In the Shadow of Freedom
by chibipinkbunny
Summary: Zack and Cloud have escaped from Hojo's lab, but they're not out of trouble yet. Cloud has mako poisoning, and Zack still has to deal with the trauma for both him and Cloud. Will they ever make it to Midgar? This story also has the ZackxAerith pairing.
1. Chapter 1

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 1**

(Revised 6/24/2010)

_**Beta Reader: Blue Jae and Cookiecat**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_**A story dedicated to Zack Fair (1984 - 2007)**_

_**May he rest in peace. . . **_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_**Until the day I die, I'll spill my heart for you**_

_**~ Story of the Year, 'Until the Day I Die'**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Twilight loomed overhead as a deep blue sky laced with lavender fell down around them. They were two men on the run, one with hair dark as night and the other with hair light as day. They'd been branded as escapees, science experiments run amok, and armed and dangerous. Long ago, they were human, born of man and woman, flesh and blood. That was before the experiments, before everything changed.

It seemed like days instead of weeks since their escape from Hojo's lab. The monotony of each day flowed into the next, a time continuum punctuated only by the interchange of the sun and the moon. Now, out in the wilderness, miles away from hell Zack was focused on the most important mission of his life: escape. He and Cloud were getting out of this alive, or they'd die trying.

He was tired, traveling every day without fail until his limbs gave out from exhaustion. Recently, his mind had started to play tricks on him, blurring the line that separated reality from dreams. Screams that existed only in his mind now gave the illusion of being real. They told him to run, run far away from the evil lurking in their midst. He was doing his best to obey, but his whole body ached with the weariness of travel. He couldn't stop for more than a few hours, or _they _would find him. So he kept going, one foot in front of the other, on and on and on towards Midgar, their final destination. Once, he knew a girl with soft green eyes and a smile as bright as the sun. He hoped that after all these years of absence Aerith was still in Midgar, waiting for him, like she was in his dreams.

They traveled through most of the day and much of the night. Zack draped Cloud's limp arm around his shoulders, and they trudged through the forest together, two men united against the world. The sun that had been their constant companion had retired for the night, so it was time to rest, find shelter in the deepest part of the woods where not even light could find them.

As they moved away from the edge of the forest, the undergrowth thinned, and the pines gave way to giant redwoods, trees as old as the forest itself. They'd seen the rise and fall of kingdoms, and through it all they remained steadfast through the ages. There was an air of antiquity amongst the trees, an ancient knowledge weaved into their course fibrous bark, and Zack felt almost as if he had stepped into the back room of a library where the old books were kept.

The wind stilled, as if the forest was hiding a secret, and it was suddenly quiet. Somewhere, an owl called, mellow, sad, faraway. Zack turned around and looked back. There was no path to follow out of the forest, nor footprints for someone to follow. "I think we're safe for now," Zack said, his voice dying in the emptiness. He looked for a spot to rest and found a small clearing bordered by rocks.

"C'mon buddy, I think you've had enough of a work-out for today," Zack said with a slight smile. He let out a grunt as he removed his friend's limp appendage from his shoulder and sat him down against a big rock.

Zack sidled up next to Cloud, propping up his exhausted frame. He took a deep breath, in his nostrils the damp rich odor of the dark and fecund earth. He took another and held it for a moment, scared that the next breath he took would be of steel, antiseptic, and mako. His body prickled with sweat, the adrenaline rush slowly receding back to normal levels. At least this ordeal was behind them. 'That's over now,' he thought. 'I'm never going back there again.' Without realizing it, he leaned in closer to Cloud and relaxed into him with a sigh."

"You ready for dinner?" he asked his unresponsive friend, half expecting an answer. Rummaging through the bag he said, "Yeah me too. Let's see what we have today. Looks like we have salami, beef jerky, and bread. Big surprise."

Zack reached down and pat his pocket. The sharp clink of coins reminded him that it had been a while since they had made a stop into town for supplies, and their food stash was disappearing quickly. Trips into town were risky, so they avoided it unless it was absolutely necessary. They had plenty of gil, but they faced a bigger problem: the perishable nature of the food. It hadn't taken him long to discover that things like cheese didn't last long in a backpack, so instead he stocked up on food items that didn't need refrigeration, were high in protein, and calorie dense .

He took out a towel and pocket-knife and began carving the salami. Just then, he heard a low rumble and gurgle come from Cloud's stomach. With a laugh he said, "I take it you're hungry. Well I guess I'll be nice and feed you first."

After their escape, it took Zack a while to figure out a method to feed his catatonic friend. Left to his own devices Cloud would have starved to death, so Zack took up the responsibility of pre-chewing the food for him.

He shoved a few slices of salami, beef jerky, and pieces of bread in his mouth and chewed it up. The food needed to be fairly well digested before he gave it to Cloud, so he rolled the mixture of food around in his mouth in a mechanical motion, as if he were a machine specifically trained for the task. After his saliva had thoroughly given the protein and starch mixture time to digest, he spit the mash-up into his hand and rolled it into a ball, all of this done without thought or emotion.

"Alright, open wide," he said as he pulled down on Cloud's slack jaw and gently placed the ball of food on the back of Cloud's tongue. "Yeah, I know it's not the best dinner you've had," he sighed, "but it's better than that crap Hojo gave us. You probably prefer that baby food we picked up the other day," he ribbed his friend.

"Unnnngh," Cloud muttered after swallowing a large lump of food.

He chuckled. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone, especially not Tifa."

Cloud responded with silence, but Zack expected nothing more.

After repeating this lengthy procedure a few times, Zack decided it was time for him to eat. He didn't notice how hungry he was until after feeding Cloud because the adrenaline rush of running from ShinRa kept his hunger at bay. Shoving mass quantities of food in his mouth, he barely paused to swallow. As he became full, he paused between bites to savor the salty tang of the salami and the rich buttery taste of the fat.

"Hey, I almost forgot about this," he remarked as he pulled out a large water bottle and some chocolate milk powder. Since the formula was hard to come by he used it as a meal supplement rather than replacement. After mixing the contents, he shook it up vigorously until most of the lumps of formula dissolved. Out of curiosity, he took a swig of the opaque brown milk drink.

"Yuck," he spat out, after reluctantly swallowing, "this tastes like chocolate covered ass." His stomach churned in protest of the vile liquid. Instead of being smooth like milk it was gritty and tasted like rancid chocolate with a bitter chemical aftertaste.

"Come here Spike." He grunted as he hoisted his friend into his lap. "Ungh, Gaia, you're heavy." Cloud's head fell heavy against his chest. "Here, drink this," he said raising the water bottle to his friend's lips.

Cloud started drinking, but before he could finish the whole bottle, he started gagging on the vile liquid.

"Whoa, take it easy there," Zack said while forcefully patting his friend's back.

Cloud sputtered, spraying chocolate milk drink on both himself and the ground. After clearing it from his lungs, he smacked his lips and thrashed his tongue around, as if it had an awful aftertaste. His head lolled from side to side before coming back to rest, slumped against Zack.

"I guess you've had enough. Alright, I'll finish the rest. No use in letting this go to waste." He eyed the bottle with a grimace. "Food is food."

Zack unscrewed the bottle top and chugged down the rest of the contents. The acrid taste filled his mouth, and the lingering bitterness made him shudder. Putting it aside, he wrapped his arms around his friend and tucked him into his larger form. Cloud buried his face into Zack's chest and huddled into the warm arms that enveloped him, like an arctic fox burrowing into the ground for protection from the harsh weather.

The bitter cold wrapped around them, strangling the warmth out of their huddled forms. Zack could feel his own hands going numb, as the winter chill started to consume them _alive_. A small voice in the back of his head told him it would be easier to curl up and let the cold swallow him whole. The bliss of eternal slumber didn't sound so bad at the moment, dark and numb, forever, but he quickly silenced the dark voice. They had come too far to give up now.

"It's okay kid, I'm not going to let you freeze," Zack said reassuringly.

Cloud let out a deep breath, and relaxed momentarily. Zack pulled Cloud into him and buried his face in a mess of blonde spikes. Cloud's scent was comforting to him, river-washed hair interlaced with musky undertones. Cloud murmured soft sounds into Zack's chest.

"I love you too kid," Zack said with a smile on his face.

Zack's smile faded as he looked upon his friend. He looked like a boy in a man's body, caught in the inescapable distance between past and present. "Great job I did. How am I supposed to be a hero if I can't even save you, Cloud?" Brushing his hand through his friend's hair he said, "Don't worry I'll help you find a way out of that nightmare. I know you're in there somewhere."

Once Cloud stopped shaking, Zack could relax. The cold barren earth beneath him had trace scents of life from the autumn before. The thought brought a smile to his face. Aerith. She always smelled of flowers and earth, light and rich at once.

He reached into his pocket and felt around for the well-worn note. The dark ink was faded, like the memories in his heart. It had been years since he last saw her, but his passion for her still burned bright. He'd make it back to Midgar to see her, even if it was the last thing he did. He made sure the note was securely tucked away before he fell asleep.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Sometime during the middle of the night, Zack took a sharp kick to the shins. He woke up with a start, his heart pounding out of his chest, and he looked over to find Cloud thrashing about.

"Nnnnngh, grrrrrr, unnnng!" Cloud's limbs flailed violently as though he were trying to defend himself against an unseen enemy.

As Zack went to grab Cloud, he noticed his eyes. The once deep pools of blue were clouded over and pulsating iridescent while the dark round islands of his pupils had narrowed into cat-like slits.

"Jenova. . ." Zack said in bewilderment, which took on a tone of anger as he spat, "damn Hojo!"

In an effort to restrain him, Zack grabbed Cloud and tightly wrapped his friend's arms across his chest. Using a loud and firm voice, he tried to get through to his friend. "Cloud! Hey, it's going to be okay, it's just you and me here!" Zack felt very much like a human straight-jacket as Cloud bucked, and writhed in his arms.

In frustration he looked up towards the heavens and said, "Leave him alone you fucking demon! You can't have him! Why don't you take me instead?" Now his voice was shaking with anger. "I said fuckin' leave him alone!"

The howling wind pierced through the night, tossing up the loose rocks and plant matter in its path. Zack dove down over his friend, shielding him from the onslaught. Finally, it was still, and his friend's thrashing weakened to a gentle tremble. Grabbing his friend, Zack pulled him close. Using the bottom of his shirt, he wiped the wetness off of Cloud's tear-stained cheeks. "Hey buddy, it's going to be okay."

Cloud broke out into small childlike sobs.

"Listen to me, kid," he commanded in a serious tone. "I'm not going to let any of those bastards ever touch you again. You're safe with me, okay?" With a tone of certainty to convince himself just as much as Cloud he said, "I'm not going to let Jenova take you either. We're going to fight it." The only problem was that he didn't know how. He wouldn't tell that to Cloud though, never.

Zack pulled back and put his hands around his friend's face. His usually pale porcelain cheeks were now a bright strawberry pink, and he was burning up. "Holy shit Spike, you've got a fever!" Unfortunately he'd seen Cloud like this more than once before, and it scared him just as much each time. He didn't have a thermometer with him, but if he had to guess Cloud was running a dangerously high fever. Cloud's immune system was responding to the foreign invader, Jenova, the only way it knew how, by trying to burn it up.

With a bit of panic in his voice, he said to his friend, "You stay here. I'll be right back." He remembered a creek that they had encountered about a mile back. He hated to leave his friend alone in such a weak state, but he had to get Cloud's fever down before he went into shock.

Zack quickly fished out a towel and collapsible bucket from the backpack and sprinted towards the creek. His mako-enhanced vision allowed him to see in the dark well enough to get around. The creek came into sight in less than five minutes. He dipped the bucket into the water and hurried back to his friend. "How ya feelin' kid?"

Cloud managed a weak groan. Sitting down on the ground next to his friend, he pulled the blonde up so that his head was resting in his lap. In this winter weather the water was barely above freezing. The frigid water burned Zack's hands as he dipped the rag into the bucket and wrung it out before placing it onto Cloud's forehead. "Here, this is going to help."

He shrunk away from the wet rag. "Hey c'mon, I've got to do this." In response, Cloud let Zack place the cool rag on his head. Zack's heart ached as he watched his friend's face twist in agony. The last thing he ever wanted to do was cause him pain. Running a hand through his friend's sweaty hair, Zack said, "Did I ever tell you how brave you are?" The corners of his mouth turned up into a slight smile as he gazed down at his friend in admiration. "Well you are. In fact, I think you're even braver than me."

Zack cradled his friend into a light slumber. The wind ushered in a period of silence, cold and dark. He could hear the shadows lurking in the background, leaves rustling, twigs snapping, and wind howling. He pulled Cloud closer.

"Hey Spike, how about a story? Hmmm, let's see. . .did I ever tell you about the time that Aerith made dinner for me?" The mere mention of the memory made him smile. "I don't think I've told you that one. Anyway. . . "

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_Aerith was the best thing to happen to him since his promotion into SOLDIER. They'd only been going out for a month, but he already knew that it was something special. She'd even reformed him of his womanizing ways, something no other girl had managed. _

_Whenever he wasn't working, he'd come down to the Slums to see his pretty flower girl. They spent most of their time in the church, a quiet sanctuary away from the clamor of the Slums, but today they went for a stroll around Wall Market. While eating hot dogs from a local vendor, he made the comment that he'd give anything for a home-cooked meal. This comment inspired Aerith to invite him over for dinner, one she would make herself. Of course, that meant he'd have to come over to her house, which meant they'd be under the constant supervision of her mother, something he wasn't fond of. But he wanted to make her happy. Besides, any home-cooked meal was bound to be better than mess hall food, or at least he thought. _

_When the night came he showed up in jeans and a sweater. In his downtime he preferred to dress casually because people tended to stare at him less when he wasn't in his SOLDIER uniform. Not that he really minded the extra attention, but it was nice to pretend that he was normal every now and then. With a touch of apprehension, he rang the doorbell. He was slightly nervous around Elmyra, Aerith's mom, because he could sense that she didn't like him. He'd been over to Aerith's house before, and she had followed him around with a cold glare. Aerith mentioned something about her mom holding a grudge against Shinra, but wouldn't elaborate. Zack set the issue aside because he could see that it bothered her, but he meant to return to it someday. _

_Opening the door she greeted him with a hug. "Hi Zack!" Taking the bottle in his hand she asked, "Hmmm, what's this?"_

"_It's just some sparkling grape juice," he said with a sheepish grin as he scratched the back of his head. She gave him a look of slight disapproval. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?" He chucked, "I swear, its non-alcoholic." _

_She couldn't hold back a smile. "You're impossible. Come on," she said grabbing his hand and pulling him into the kitchen. "It will probably be only a few minutes until dinner is done so why don't you take a seat in the living room. I've got to finish setting the table."_

"_Hey, do you need help with anything?" he asked hoping she really didn't. He wasn't very good in the kitchen. _

_Unfortunately, she took him up on the offer. With a smile she said, "Sure, that'd be great. Why don't you keep an eye on that pot with milk on the stove. Once it boils just add that packet over there. I'm just going to go set up the table."_

"_Okay, I think I can do that." He walked over to the pot of milk on the stove. "Hmmm, what's this supposed to be?" _

"_Mashed potatoes." _

"_Really?"_

"_Yeah, that's what that bag is, dried potato flakes."_

_He gulped_, _silently_,_ so that she wouldn't notice. "It's boiling now so I just pour the flakes in, right?" He wasn't expecting four-star restaurant quality, but even he could make mashed potatoes from dried flakes. His mom had spoiled him with years of delicious food, so perhaps his perspective on the issue of home-cooked meals was skewed. _

"_Yep. After that just pour it into that bowl over there, and put a plate over it so that it doesn't get cold. Alright I've got the table set. Now we just have to wait for my mom." _

_Zack's eyes shifted to the floor as he asked, "Where is she?"_

"_Oh, she's just finishing getting ready." As if reading his thoughts, she continued, "Don't worry, she doesn't hate you. She knows you're different from the rest."_

_He let out a little chuckle. How did she always know exactly what he was thinking? He walked over to her, and wrapped his hands around her waist. "Well in that case," he said with a smile as he leaned in for a kiss. _

_Surprised to see the young couple making out in her kitchen, Elmyra gave a loud cough as she descended the stairs. Startled, Aerith looked down at the floor to hide her rosy cheeks. As Elmyra approached them, she said, "It's nice to see you again Zack." _

_Trying to appear confident, Zack held his hand out for a handshake, but his voice came out a bit shaken. "The pleasure is mine Mrs. Gainsborough." _

_Aerith couldn't help but stifle a chuckle as she turned towards Zack. Ever the smooth talker, it was a rare opportunity that she saw him flustered._

"_Is dinner done dear?" Elmyra asked. _

"_Oh yes, please have a seat." She went to the oven to pull out some biscuits, and a large casserole dish._

_The kitchen table was a little square with four chairs. Zack approached the table awkwardly because he wasn't sure where to sit. Of course he wanted to sit next to Aerith, but he wanted to be as far away from Elmyra as possible, though his options were limited with three people and four chairs. He took his chances and decided to sit across from Elmyra. He figured dinner would be bearable as long as he sat next to Aerith._

"_You know Aerith prepared this dinner all by herself," Elmyra said proudly. _

"_Uh, yeah, that's what she was telling me," he said with a nervous smile, looking over in Aerith's direction. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Something about the oven made him realize that he had to change the rag on Cloud's head. "How's that fever doin' buddy?"

He reached down to feel Cloud's forehead and noticed that his bright rosy cheeks had faded into a soft pink glow. Dipping the warm rag back into the cool water, he wrung it out and placed it back on Cloud's forehead. Something grabbed his leg, and his SOLDIER reflexes made him reach for his sword, but then he noticed it was Cloud. "Hey, don't worry, I'm not going anywhere," he said reassuringly.

Cloud grunted in response, but his grip remained just as firm. Running a hand through the blonde spikes, Zack said, "It's going to be okay Spike. Anyway, where was I in that story? Oh that's right I was about to get to the part where we eat. . . . "

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

"_All right, here it is" Aerith said with a hint of excitement as she set down a bowl of biscuits, and mashed potatoes on the table. "Hold on, I have to get the main dish." _

_Zack's eyes went wide with horror as he noticed the bottom of the biscuits were black._

_Aerith returned to the kitchen table with the chicken and rice casserole dish. "Is something wrong?"_

_Shaking it off with a big grin he said, "Oh no, I'm just really hungry."_

"_Good," she said clasping her hands together in delight as she took the seat between her mother and Zack. "Alright, it's time to eat." Zack was about to serve himself when Aerith said, "Let me do that for you." Knowing he always had a large appetite, she piled his plate high with burnt biscuits, dry mashed potatoes, and chicken surprise. "Here you go," she said with a smile. _

_Gaia, he loved that smile. It was enough to get him to do anything really. It was probably even enough to get him to eat that full plate of unappetizing food._

"_I almost forgot that sparkling grape juice you brought Zack." She walked over to get it from the counter. As she poured the juice for the three of them she noticed Zack hadn't started eating. "Is something wrong Zack?"_

"_What? Oh, I didn't want to be rude and start eating before you sat down." _

"_You're sweet."_

_Zack loved it when she called him sweet. He never could get enough of her compliments, and if it took consumption of her food to be deserving of them, then that's just what he was going to do. Well, it was now or never. He'd try and eat it fast so that he didn't taste much. He shoveled a forkful of the chicken and rice mixture into his mouth. Something was crunchy. Chicken wasn't supposed to crunch, right? It didn't take long for him to realize that the crunch came from the rice. Perhaps she didn't cook it long enough. The chicken was dry and overcooked though. He wasn't quite sure how she managed to overcook the chicken while undercooking the rice; that was quite a feat. He kept shoveling food into his mouth focusing on the task at hand. The burnt biscuits were dry, and scratched his throat as they slowly made their way into his stomach. The dry mashed potatoes weren't much better, and he had a hard time swallowing because they stuck to the back of his throat. Aerith was blessed with many things in life, but cooking wasn't one of them._

_Aerith noticed the speed with which he devoured his dinner and commented, "Seems like you really like it."_

_His mouth was too full to answer, but he managed a smile and a nod. Pausing to take a drink of the juice, he noticed that Elmyra and Aerith were sort of pushing the food around on their plate. _

"_Is it okay mom?" she asked uneasily. _

"_Oh yes dear. It's very good. I'm just not very hungry tonight." _

_Zack wasn't fooled, and by the look of her face Aerith wasn't either. Hoping to cheer her up, he finished scarfing down his dinner in record time so that he could ask for a second helping. This brought a smile back to her face as she dished up another heaping plate of food for him. Mustering all of his strength, he managed to start in on his second helping. After finishing, he tried to say in a convincing voice, "That was really good Aerith." _

_She smiled at him and said, "Thanks, Zack." _

_Aerith stood up to start cleaning after dinner when her mother interrupted, "Oh don't worry about that. You and Zack go have some fun." _

_Grabbing Zack's hand, she started up the stairs toward her room. _

"_Not that much fun," her mother said tersely. She certainly wasn't going to have any of that foolishness in her house, so she redirected them to the living room. "Why don't you kids go pick out a movie, and I'll be there in a few minutes."_

"_Okay, thanks mom." They walked into the living room, and sat down on the couch. "So you really liked it?" she asked in disbelief. She had tasted the food, and even though she might have tried to convince herself it wasn't half bad, she wasn't a fool._

"_Of course," he said with a smile. _

_Raising an eyebrow, she gave his shoulder a gentle push. "Oh Zack, you're too sweet."_

"_I guess I'll take that as a compliment." He flashed a smile of indulgence before moving in._

_She was light and soft, like flowers in the spring. He captured her mouth and she breathed into him with a sigh, fluttering thin, like petals in the wind. He leaned into her, and she gave under his weight, as they fell together onto the couch. His mouth was warm and wet, the fire of a sun she had never seen, and she wanted to drink him in. More and more and more. Their tongues played, while hands touched and stroked, appreciative at first, but then greedy and avaricious. A fire burning in the forest, and she melted into him, smoldering fire. He nibbled on her neck as she clung to him, holding onto his firm muscular back. As he pressed kisses to her collarbone, she arched up beneath him and threw her head back. He slid a hand under her shirt, fluid contours, and soft skin. She managed to break away from the trance. The fire nearly consumed them. Panting and breathless, she said, "Zack I think we should stop."_

_He pulled back for a moment, saw the look of desire in her eyes, and leaned in for a kiss. _

_With a hand, she gently pushed him away. "Zack, you know my mom's in the other room," she whispered discreetly. _

"_Yeah I guess you're right." With a sigh he sat up, and Aerith straightened out her dress. Sensing his disappointment, she reached for Zack's hand and intertwined her delicate fingers in his rough calloused ones. _

_It wasn't long before Elmyra came into the room. "So what movie did you two pick out?"_

"_Uh. . . ," Zack stammered, then turned to look at Aerith. He was always trying his best to make a good impression, though the squiggle smile on Elmyra's straight-laced face told a different story._

"_Oh, this one mom," Aerith said as she pointed to the movie, "The Last Unicorn." _

"_You let her pick this Zack?" Elmyra asked with a chuckle. _

_All Zack could manage was an innocent shrug, but inside he cringed. He was weak against women, and Aerith was taking advantage of him._

"_Well, this is one of my favorites too. I like tough guys that aren't afraid to get emotional every now and then." _

_While Elmyra popped the movie into the player, Zack sunk back into the couch with a sigh. Aerith squeezed his hand and smiled sweetly. 'Oh well, it was worth it,' he thought to himself._

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

"Gaia, I really miss her Cloud. . . " His voice trailed off in a melancholy fashion. "Well, story time is over I guess."

He looked down at his friend and noticed that Cloud's fever had broken, but he was shivering again. "What am I going to do with you Spike?" he said shaking his head, "you know, you gave me a real scare tonight kiddo." His voice became deep with worry and took on a serious tone. "You better not think of leavin' me, or I'll have to kick your ass. Got it?" Zack became silent as he felt a lump rise in the back of his throat. Pushing it down, he cut himself off before he could get sentimental. "Come on, let's go back to sleep."

Pulling the wet rag off of Cloud, he lay his friend down on the ground and curled up beside him. As he drifted off, thoughts of Aerith filled his mind, and his heart ached with the desperation of a man that would give anything to see his lover once again. Well, anything but Cloud, and that was non-negotiable.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Author's Note: (Updated 6/24/10) **Okay, so this is the 3rd revision of the 1st chapter. It wouldn't surprise me if I come back and revise it again. You may have noticed that all of my scene breaks have disappeared. I don't know what happened, so I need to replace them in all 19 some chapters. Yuck. . . It may take a while. If you're reading this for the first time I should mention that this was my first fanfiction ever, so the unrevised early chapters are a bit rocky. I'm getting to them, slowly.

A heads up for the next chapter: dreams, past memories, and hallucinations are italicized while the present is in regular font. Remember that as you read. There are lots of dreams, flashbacks, and hallucinations.

In addition to my two lovely betas, I wanted to thank** Demonegg, Goopy Sentimentalist, **and **Heather** for their story help. Thank you! *Hugs*

When I stared to write this there was a shortage of Cloud and Zack friendship stories. Lol, actually there's quite a few of them now. . . I'm okay with them as lovers, but I much prefer them as friends. Maybe that's because I believe Zack's totally in love with Aerith. There's also quite a bit of Zack, and Aerith in this story, and a little bit of Cloud and Tifa. This story takes place after their escape from Hojo's lab.

As a side note, "The Last Unicorn," was my favorite animated movie growing up ^^

It's almost hard to believe that this story was to be nothing more than a one-shot. Thanks to the encouragement of my first two reviews from **Blue Jae** and **mom calling**, I continued and I'm going to go all the way through to the end. I believe Zack, and Cloud are both very strong, and masculine characters, but it was hard to make Cloud masculine in this story. He's in a very infantile state after the Mako poisoning so keep that in mind as you read.

**Disclaimer:** All characters are property of Square Enix


	2. Chapter 2

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 2**

(Revised 9/1/2010)

_**Beta Readers: Cookiecat and Blue Jae**_

_The midday sun rose above the clouds, while scattered rays of light took their roam of the land, painting the grassy hills and fields of trees in hues of gold, bronze, and yellow. He was lying down on the grass, hands tucked neatly behind his head, as though he did not expect to sleep, thinking._

_The sound of footsteps interrupted the peaceful silence. Startled out of his trance, he sat up and turned around to see a feminine figure emerging from the shaded woods. The sun outlined her slender form, creating an aura of light around her, as if she were a celestial being descended from the heavens__. __As she came closer, Zack immediately recognized her._

_"Aerith!" he cried in pleasant surprise._

_"Hi Zack," she replied sweetly, a smile on her lips. She walked over to him, kneeled down on the grass, and leaned into him._

_He pressed a soft kiss onto her forehead. Reaching over, he intertwined his hand in hers, and in doing so, he noticed a thin layer of dirt under her nails. 'She must have come from the church,' he thought to himself. He looked around and __suddenly __noticed the grass stretched out all around him, dropping off past the horizon. "Hey Aerith," he asked, slightly alarmed, "where are we?" _

"_You always ask such silly questions," she said with a light laugh, dismissive, as if his inquiry had no basis for concern. _

"_Heh, I guess you're right." Somehow Aerith managed to make everything alright, even if he was unsure of himself or the situation._

_She rested her head on his shoulder, and he relaxed into her, closing his eyes and letting himself be swept away by the moment. They sat like this, calm and peaceful, like two birds nestled together on a branch. It was the peace of being loved and loving in return. He slowly opened his eyes to find Aerith plucking a flower from the ground, a dandelion gone to seed._

_Holding it up to him she asked, "Have you ever made a wish on one of these flowers?" Her eyes twinkled with the excitement of a child: that unbridled enthusiasm that inspires those around them. _

_With playful sarcasm, he said, "Sure, who hasn't."_

_Ignoring his comment, she continued, "Well, here's how it works. You make a wish, and then you blow on the flower. If you manage to blow off all the seeds at once__, __your wish will come true." She closed her eyes tightly, as if she was focusing on an important task, something that needed her full concentration. As she blew on the flower, a gust of wind swept through the area, picking up the seeds and plastering them on Zack. She laughed as he swatted at the pesky seeds in an exaggerated gesture for her amusement. _

_He looked over at the weed in her hand, which still had several seeds attached to the stem. His voice took on a serious tone. "So, I guess your wish won't come true then."_

_With a slight smile, she said in a coy manner, "Oh, I wouldn't say that."_

_Intrigued, he leaned in close and asked, "So, what'd you wish for?"_

_She blushed a light pink and turned away in slight embarrassment, "I can't tell you. . . It's silly."_

_"I promise, I won't tell anyone." _

_"Hmmm, well. . . maybe later." Picking up another flower, she held it out reverently, presenting it to him as if it were a gift. "Here, now it's your turn." _

_Taking it in his hand, he closed his eyes in deep concentration. __After making his wish, he thought to himself, 'I'm just lucky none of the guys back in SOLDIER know about me making wishes on flowers. They'd never let me live this down.' _

_Startling him out of his thoughts, she asked, "Got your wish yet?"_

_He nodded, and with a big breath he blew on the weed. They turned to watch as the seeds flew into the air in a flurry of white, like feathers dancing in the wind, fragile and ephemeral. Zack blinked and they were gone. He smiled as he looked down at the empty stem in his hand. _

_"Looks like you get your wish," she said with a coy smile. _

_Picking at the stem absently, he asked, "Want to know what I wished for?"_

_Teasingly, she said, "To be a hero,"_

"_Not quite." He looked up to find a pair of sparkling green eyes staring up at him, and he suddenly felt himself drowning in her essence, the warm waters pulling him down, but he didn't struggle. Simply, he replied, "To be with you."_

_Giving him a gentle push on the chest, she said, "Don't be silly."_

"_No, I'm serious," he tried to say without laughing, but he was unsuccessful. After a pause he started again. "I really mean it, that's what I wished for." He reached over to hold her hands, which were soft and delicate, and gave way easily to his much larger ones. His voice was hesitant at first, but gained confidence towards the end. "You're the first girl that's really made me feel something__ like this__. There's just something special about you."_

_She looked away, as if the sight of him was painful and pulled her hands from his. Her voice echoed this sentiment, "I bet you say that to every girl."_

_He spoke with determination. "Aerith, I'm being serious here. I've never felt this way about a girl before." _

_She replied contemplatively, as if thinking out loud, "You really mean that don't you?"_

_Brushing a wisp of hair out of her face, his hand trailed down her neck in a lingering motion. They came together instantaneously, like polar opposites, positive and negative, the magnetic pull greater than the both of them, greater than understanding itself, and so they gave into their desires. Hands explored each other with eagerness, while lips grazed and nipped at areas of sensitive skin. After nearly exhausting themselves, Zack lay on his back with Aerith resting on his chest. She nuzzled him under the chin as he wrapped an __arm __around her waist. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and said softly, with a voice barely above a whisper, "I love you Aerith." _

"_I love you too," she murmured into his chest. Wrapped in each other's arms they drifted off. _

_When Zack woke up, Aerith was standing, hovering over him, light and ethereal, as if she was floating on air, Gone from her face was the cheerful smile and in its place was a cold expression and glassy eyes, like green shiny marbles. It reminded Zack of lost spirit trapped between this life and the next, searching for its reason of being._

_Surrounding them now was an enchanted forest of sorts. Out of the ground rose hundreds of trees, their bare spiny limbs stretching up towards the heavens, as if begging for mercy from a god that had yet to answer. Under the starless night the trees glistened as though coated with a fine layer of silver dust. __Zack had never seen this place before. It was a while before he could bring himself to speak, "Aerith, where are we?"_

_"The Forgotten City," she said in a somber tone. _

_Even more confused than before, he asked, "Wait, how did we. . .?"_

_She cut him off sharply, "Zack." She paused and turned away from him, "There's something important that I have to do."_

_Pushing himself up to a standing position, he said in a determined voice, "Then I'll come with you."_

_"No!" Her voice came out much harsher than intended and she recoiled at the sound of it. Clenching her fists by her side, she continued, "This is something I have to do by myself. Please understand. . . " Then she took off running and was swallowed up by the dark of the night._

_"Wait! Aerith!" Zack took off after her, but even with his Mako enhanced speed he couldn't keep up. The path before him led up to a large building fashioned after a conch shell. If the situation wasn't so urgent, he would have stopped to marvel at the unique architecture. 'She must have gone in there,' Zack thought to himself. "Hang on Aerith, I'm coming."_

_As he entered the large shell structure, his attention was drawn to a glowing blue hole in the middle of the floor. He approached cautiously. Peering down, he saw a glass staircase that spiraled downwards. His first few steps were hesitant as he tested the strength of the glass. Once he was assured of their durability, he quickly made his way down. It wasn't long before he saw her in the distance; she was kneeling on a raised altar, her hands clasped in prayer. It reminded him of the stories he'd read of lamb sacrifices to the gods, but unlike them, bleating with terror, she had accepted her fate. She had gone up willingly, and waited now, not to die, but to take away the sins of the world _

_"Aerith!" he called out to her._

_She gave no response. Her body was eerily still, and she looked more like a statue of a goddess rather than a human being, eyes frozen shut and mouth firmly closed. _

_He couldn't run fast enough as his feet led him over to the altar where she was praying. Bending down to meet her gaze, he said, "C'mon Aerith. Let's get out of here. I have a really bad feeling about this place." _

_Her eyes no longer sparkled with life, but gave off a dull glimmer instead, like a dying fire, a life about to be extinguished. Zack reached out and threw his arms around her in a tight embrace. She was cold to the touch, as if her veins had been drained of blood and filled with ice instead. It made his own blood run cold and he struggled to keep from panicking, Uncontrollable now, he started to plead and his voice took on a shrill pitch of desperation, "Please Aerith! We have to get out of here!"_

_There was still no response, so Zack decided he was going to move her himself and find a way to help her once they got out of this strange place. With a grunt he put his arms around her waist and tried to lift, but nothing happened. On the second try he thought, 'If I just try a little bit harder, I can get it,' but still nothing happened. Now Zack's thoughts were a blur and he was having trouble keeping his focus. _

_Overhead, he could hear a faint whistling, the sound of cold steel tearing through the air. He looked up and saw a man with long silver hair coming towards them, like a silver streak of lighting falling out of the sky. Zack jumped in front of Aerith's kneeling form, and pulled out his sword. As the silver streak came hurtling towards him he realized it was __none other than __Sephiroth. The Masamune met the Buster Sword with a deafening clank, and Zack bent down under the pressure. Summoning all of his strength, he pushed back against Sephritoh. Zack let out a deep groan as he slowly rose up. Through gritted teeth, he grunted, "Why?" _

_Sephiroth flashed a merciless smirk in response._

_Zack managed to parry the next few attacks, but he was quickly losing his breath, while Sephiroth was hardly exerting any effort. Despite giving everything he had, Sephiroth gained the advantage and undercut Zack's sword, thereby flinging him into the air. The Buster Sword flew out of Zack's hands and he found himself sprawled out on the floor, defenseless. The air was knocked out of him, and he struggled to get up. He only managed to push himself up on his elbows before he saw Sephiroth move over to Aerith and lift the Masamune high above her. The continuum of time seemed to slow as Zack was forced to watch the whole scene in horror. Sephiroth plunged the Masamune clean and deep into Aerith. _

_Zack opened his mouth to scream, but only a forced silence came out. Before he could get the strength to move, the General effortlessly leaped over to him with the grace of a gazelle. Sephiroth was standing over him, looking down at Zack with silver eyes that flashed an inhuman absence. He had the Masamune poised over Zack's chest, ready to strike. __Zack winced in anticipation of the final blow, the bite of cold steel as it ate into flesh. It wouldn't be long before he met his end._

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Author's Notes (9/1/2010): **

This is one of the weakest chapters, and as I go back and revise it I'm not really sure why I made it separate from chapter one. As always, revisions are slow. . .

Thanks to those friends who have helped with this chapter, **Heather**, **Goopy Sentimentalist, Armae, ****Cookiecat**, and **Blue Jae**. *Hugs* Thank you so much ^^

As a reminder dreams, past memories, and hallucinations are italicized while the present is in regular font. Don't worry as this is still a Zack/Cloud friendship story and is meant to center around their friendship. Let me know if you like the characters and/or their interactions.


	3. Chapter 3

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 3**

(Revised 4/18/2011)

**Beta Readers: Blue Jae and Cookiecat**

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

The blow from the Masamune never came. Zack's eyes snapped open. Drenched in a thick layer of sweat, his chest heaved as he sucked in large amounts of air, each breath a large white puff in the chilly night. As he examined his surroundings, he took notice of the fact that Cloud was still right next to him, sleeping soundly. With a sigh of relief, he ran a hand through his messy hair. He propped himself up against the large rock behind him and slumped against it. Placing a hand over his laboring heart, he tried to block the painful image of Aerith's death. Eyes winced in pain, he called out to her, "Aerith. . ." but his voice was lost to the howling wind. He could only hope that Tseng had kept his promise to watch out for her.

Frantically sorting through his thoughts, he convinced himself the dream was the result of mako withdrawal, a transitory blip of regression in his many days of progress, nothing more. Looking out into the distance, he said, "I'm gonna go for a walk. I'll be right back."

Just as he was about to leave, Cloud whimpered and curled into himself, wrapping his arms around his shivering frame. The edges of Zack's mouth lifted into as smile. "Poor kid. You're pretty cold, huh?" He unbuckled his suspenders and pulled off his shirt. Then he bent down and wrapped it tightly around his friend. "Here, you need this more than I do." After putting all his gear back on he was ready to go. Standing there, he took one last look at Cloud before he ran off.

His feet led the way, pounding into the ground as he fled from the horrors that plagued him. The wind lashed at his bare back like a whip, the successive lashings tearing into him, wearing his back raw. Old wounds were opened, the pain of the past bleeding out, relieving him of pent up emotions.

Stopping him in his tracks was a shimmer of luminescence on the ground. He approached it cautiously thinking it might be a trap of some sort, but as he came closer he discovered that the object was actually a white feather. Picking it up to examine it, he noticed that it was at least a foot in length, much too long to have come from a bird. Perhaps it came from the wing of a monster or maybe an angel.

_Angeal. . . _

It was as if all strength had left his body, and he came crashing down as his legs gave out from beneath him. He stayed like that for a moment before he found the strength to stand once more. "Angeal. . . " he said in a solemn tone, clutching the feather to his bare chest. He closed his eyes and gripped the feather even tighter as the wind dared to tear it from his grasp.

Opening his eyes, he looked up towards the sky, an infinite expanse of darkness punctuated by twinkling stars. Thrusting his fists down and throwing his head back, he cried, "Angeal! Why did you abandon me?" There was only silence in return. His voice softened, sounding more like the teenager he was then the man he had become. "What am I supposed to do now? How am I going to help Cloud? What would you do Angeal?"

He paused a moment, then he sat down on the ground, feather still clutched in hand. At one time he had the world at his feet, but in the flash of a fire it was gone. His hopes and dreams went up in flames as the town of Nibelheim burned to the ground, but that was only the prologue of his epic tale. The next few chapters of his life would be the ultimate test of his strength and willpower. Despite all of the trials and tribulations life had thrown at him, he would continue to play the part of the hero and fight until his dying breath.

With only the silent night as his companion, his mind drifted off to a memory of when the horror all began.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_Hojo paced the room of his laboratory, his steps slow and deliberate, each one filled with purpose._ _In the background, Zack and Cloud hung lifeless in separate tubes of mako. _"_Oh yes," Hojo said to himself, but loud enough for others to hear, "the success of these two specimens will keep me at the head of Shinra's Science Department forever. Then maybe that nitwit president Shinra will listen to me every once in a while." Turning to the guards he said, "Take Specimen 520 and 521 to their rooms. Their wounds have fully healed." He stood there, the sharp planes of his face accentuating his crooked smile, his eyes two caverns in which the mako glowed. "They're drugged up so they won't be giving you much resistance," his smile widened as he faced Zack and Cloud, "now will you?"_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_Cloud and Zack had been transferred into a small cell. It was dark; a lamp nearby provided a low level of light, casting a faint orange glow on the room. There was no sound in the room. There was nothing in it save for the sunless stone and silence and the smell of death, where people had died and people would die yet. They had a few basic amenities: two cots, and a bathroom _

_It would be several hours before the effects of the sedating drugs wore off. Cloud was the first to regain consciousness. Upon waking, his head throbbed, each beat of his heart sending another wave of pain through his skull, and his skin burned, like he had been immersed in a fire, and then suddenly everything came back to him. Nibelheim. Sephiroth. Fire! _

_In one movement, he bolted upright and looked at his arms. They were a pale shade of cream, the color they had always been, not a charred black like he had feared. 'Perhaps it was a dream,' he thought to himself. Cloud looked around the cell only to find his friend laid out on the cot next to him, his sinewy frame stretched out so he was laying flat on his back, arms down by his side, and stripped of all his clothes. That was when Cloud realized he was naked himself. _

_He looked around the cell for their clothes, but instead of their military outfits, there were two white T-shirts and two pairs of black shorts. He snatched up the smaller of the two outfits and put it on. Grabbing the other outfit, he went to go back to sit on his cot. He figured he'd give the clothes to Zack when he woke up. _

_After a few hours passed, Zack awoke, slowly opening his eyes as he took in his new surroundings. Cloud, who had been carefully watching his friend, noticed he was finally awake. "Hey," Cloud called softly._

_Zack grimaced as he sat up. He swung both legs over the side of the cot and cradled his head in his hands. _

"_Headache?" Cloud asked, his voice without emotion, without anything at all. _

"_Yeah," Zack moaned._

"_Me too. . ."_ _Tossing Zack a pile of clothes, Cloud said, "Here, you might want to put these on."_

_Looking down at himself, Zack noticed that he was naked and tried to conceal his embarrassment with a smile. "Thanks."_

_Cloud waited until Zack was fully dressed, then he looked up at him, his blue eyes glowing amidst a somber expression, like flashes of lightning in a thunderstorm. "Zack, where are we? This isn't a dream is it?"_

"_Well," he said with a sigh, "my best guess would be the dungeon of ShinRa Mansion." Zack paused as he saw Cloud's gaze drop to the floor. A moment later, a sly grin spread across Zack's face. "To answer your second question, this place must be a nightmare cause I'm stuck here with you."_

_Piercing blue eyes gazed at Zack beneath furrowed eyebrows. Then Cloud picked up his pillow and chucked it at Zack. "Zack, you're an idiot."_

_Zack easily dodged the pillow thrown at him. "Well, I can't be that dumb because I'm the one with two pillows now." Zack's eyes twinkled with mischief and in one fluid movement, he had grabbed up both pillows and threw them at his friend. _

_Cloud managed to dodge one, but not the other pillow. "Oooof," he grunted as it hit him, the impact knocking him flat out on his cot. He stayed there for a moment, thinking back on a memory. One day his mother pulled him aside, her voice dark and filled with purpose, and cautioned him to stay away from the ShinRa mansion. Not that he needed the warning, The howls that emanated from that place echoed in the hearts of even the bravest of men. He sat up, the pain in his head intensifying as he did so. In a defeated voice, Cloud said "Zack, I've got a really bad feeling about this place."_

"_Yeah, me too Spike."_

_It was silent for a moment, both men looking at a common spot on the ground, as if they were thinking the same thing yet completely unaware. Cloud looked up and spoke, "Zack, while we were in those tanks I heard, _things_." The last word was followed by an audible gulp of air. "What did he mean by calling us specimens?"_

_Zack beat his chest with his fist, "I don't know, and we're going to get out of here before we find out." Zack rose up from his cot and started to pace the room, much like a tiger in captivity. _

"_Who was that guy that kept smiling at us?" Cloud asked. _

_Zack stopped and turned towards Cloud._ "_You mean the freak with the dark ponytail and glasses?" he replied in disgust_

"_Yeah. . . "_

"_That's Hojo. Pretty damn creepy huh?" Cloud gave a slow nod in response. " He's the one that oversaw all of the Mako injections for the SOLDIER program." Zack looked over at Cloud and noticed he looked like a scared little boy, still, small, and motionless in his white shirt. Hoping to dispel some of the tension, he reached over and gave Cloud's hair a playful ruffle_

"_Stop that! It makes me feel like a kid," Cloud said, jerking away from Zack's hand._

"_Stop what?" he asked with a smile on his face. "Oooohhhhh, you mean this." Zack reached over once again, but Cloud preempted his attack and pushed his hand away. Cloud tried to fight the smile that was slowly forming on his face. He kept a straight face as he spat, "Jerk."_

_Zack couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah whatever, I know you like it." He reached his hand out to Cloud, "C'mon, and help me find something that will help us escape."_

_After standing up, Cloud took a more thorough look at the cell, but there wasn't anything but stone to the interior. "So what exactly are we looking for?" _

"_You know, something sharp. Something that you could use to stab someone," Zack explained._

"_Don't you think they already thought of that before they put us in here?" Cloud flatly responded._

"_Do you want to help, or not?" he said in mild frustration._

_With a sigh Cloud gave in. "Alright, it's not like I have anything better to do." _

_Zack gently punched his friend's shoulder, "That's the spirit Spike. Alright, I guess I'll take this main room, and you can look in the bathroom."_

_As Cloud walked into the bathroom, he noticed the mirror, which sparked an idea. Turning his head, he called out to Zack through the doorway, "Hey, what about this mirror? Maybe we could use it as a weapon. If we can break it up somehow we could use it like a dagger," Cloud explained._

"_Good thinkin," Zack patted him on the shoulder and Cloud smiled to himself. "Step back," Zack said, taking a deep breath of concentration. Cloud stepped to the side as Zack pulled his fist back. Cloud ducked, and put his hands over his head. As Zack made contact with the glass, it shattered into many pieces. "Hey Cloud, you can get up now. Looks like we got a few big pieces here," Zack said as he visually inspected the mirror remnants in the sink. _

_Cloud made his way over to the sink. That's when he noticed that Zack's hand was bloody and embedded with glass splinters. "Are you going to be okay Zack?" he asked with concern. _

"_Oh this?" he raised his bloody fist close to his face and made a small frown of disapproval. "It looks worse than it is, but I'll be okay," he reassured Cloud. _

"_How about I help you clean up your fist," Cloud offered._

"_Sure, but let's finish this first." Zack reasoned that a mirror piece with a sharp edge to cut flesh, and a blunt edge to hold would work best as a weapon. Sifting carefully through the glass shards, Zack pulled out one with a blunt edge. "Well, here's one. This one's got a nice sharp edge on it too." He handed it to Cloud. "Let's see if I can find another one with a good handle and a sharp edge." It took him a little longer to find another one. "Aha, here it is." He held up the second one in an over exaggerated gesture._

_Furrowing his brows, Cloud asked, "Why does mine have blood on it?"_

_Zack brought his face down to Cloud's large mirror shard for closer inspection. "Huh, what do you know? I guess it does." Patting his friend on the back he said with a smile, "Look at it this way, I broke it in for you. If you use it right it's going to be covered in blood anyway."_

_As Zack walked past him, Cloud muttered darkly, "Thanks."_

_Throwing his hands up in an exaggerated fashion, Zack said with a sarcastic lilt, "Well, I guess we're good then."_

_Cloud laughed heartily, as if he and Zack were back in Midgar joking for old time's sake. The sound was foreign to him. He could hear himself laughing, but did not recognize it as his own._

_Zack looked on at Cloud in confusion. Walking over to him, he crouched down and asked, "Hey buddy, are you okay?"_

_Cloud couldn't stop laughing long enough to answer, so he nodded his head in confirmation. But as his anxiety, fear, and anger bubbled up to the surface, his laughter turned into shaking trembles of sorrow. Tears were flowing freely from his eyes and he raised his hands up to cover them. Pressing hard on his eyes, he tried to get the tears to stop, but they just kept flowing. _

_Zack felt a tug on his heart strings as he looked over at his friend, who looked more like a scared child than someone in the military. He lunged forward and wrapped Cloud in a strong hug. Cloud let the warmth of Zack's embrace break him down even further. "Zack, I'm really scared. . . "_

_By this time Zack's own eyes were starting to water a bit. He moved one hand up to stroke Cloud's mess of blonde spikes and kept the other arm wrapped around him in security. "It's going to be okay. We'll get out of here, and everything will be okay."_

"_If we even get out of here, where will we go? Where will I go? My mom is dead, and I can't go back to ShinRa," Cloud said, choking on his tears. The salty liquid made him gag, and he coughed a few times before he resumed crying. _

"_Don't worry, we'll stick together and figure something out," Zack said in a reassuring voice. Once Cloud calmed down a little, Zack shook his own head and said with a sarcastic sigh, "Sorry kid, it looks like you're stuck with me." _

_Cloud managed a laugh through tears that were slowly disappearing. He felt his arms moving up and around the figure of his friend in an embrace. Managing to stifle his tears, he asked, "Promise?"_

"_Promise," Zack confirmed with a nod of the head and a sincere smile. He held his good hand out. "C'mon, you were going to help me clean up my hand, right?" _

_Cloud gripped his hand as Zack helped pull him up. Wiping the stale tears from his eyes he said, "Yeah that's right." _

_Zack noticed his friend's grisly appearance, bloodshot eyes, pink nose, flushed cheeks, and disheveled spikes. "You know Spike, you look like shit. Maybe you should take a nap first." _

_The blonde gave him a playful shove. "Fuck you Zack," he said with a smirk. Cloud followed Zack over to his cot and sat down next to him. _

_Zack was smiling as he held his damaged hand out for Cloud to inspect it. "Thanks Spike, I owe you one."_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_Later that night they attempted escape. As the stronger of the two, Zack had taken the front so that he could tackle any guards that came their way. They made it as far as the stairway, but were apprehended as they mounted the steps to freedom. While fighting off the opposition, Cloud was abducted and dragged back down towards the lab. Zack knew he probably could have made it, just a few guards and he would be free. The thought crossed his mind, but then he glanced back at his friend, his fragile body twisting against the restraints, and those sad blue eyes in the silent throes of terror. It was his undoing. He went back to help his friend. . ._

_It would be four years before they finally escaped and at that point there wasn't much left of his friend to save. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_I owe you one. . . _

Everything seemed clear to him at the moment. With a renewed sense of optimism he said, "Hang on Cloud, I'm coming back."

The soft echo of chirping birds rang throughout the forest while the sun began her ascent into the sky. 'Damn,' he thought to himself, 'I told Cloud I'd be right back. I hope he's okay.'

He ran back to the spot where they'd camped out for the night. Pumping his legs as fast as they would go, he felt the adrenaline coursing through his body, imbuing him with extra speed. As he approached the area he'd left just hours ago, he noticed immediately that something was wrong. Cloud was gone.

Panic quickly overtook him and within seconds he was trembling. "Cloud!" he yelled, holding one hand cupped around his mouth to amplify the sound. Usually Cloud reacted to his name with some sort of sound, so when Zack didn't hear anything he became really worried. He tried again, his voice thick with desperation, "Clooouuuud!" Again, no response.

Zack walked back to the place he left Cloud, and bent down to closely examine the area. There was blood on the ground.

"Someone must have taken him." He fell to his knees and pounded the ground in aguish, his fist making an imprint in the hard earth. "Fuck!" In a voice seething with anger he said, "I'm gonna kill the bastards that took you Cloud!" Zack turned toward the sun, its soft rays of light melting away the clouds. "Don't worry buddy, I'm going to find you. I promise."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Summary:** So the original version of this chapter was really bad. *sigh* Well I guess that means I've improved a great deal, but it also means this story is highly variable in style and quality. This still isn't as good as my current writing, but to completely rewrite this chapter would take a great deal more time. For now I think a revision is adequate. I might come back and do a re-revision XD I think I revised the first chapter three times before moving on. . .

This is an angst filled chapter. I don't believe that Zack is an angst filled person, but he's had a lot of bad things happen to him so he's bound to get upset every now and then. In fact I think that's the beauty of his character.

**Disclaimer:** None of these characters belong to me. All of them belong to Square Enix


	4. Chapter 4

The morning mist, which usually felt refreshing, now felt thick and suffocating. Zack felt dizzy and lightheaded, like a fish out of water, as he struggled to breathe. His anger and anxiety over Cloud's disappearance brought him to the edge of hyperventilation. He had to force his body to slow down and take big gulps of air, or he knew he was going to pass out. Just a few hours ago, he had held Cloud in slumber, safe and secure. Now his friend was gone and most likely in danger. The brutal reality of it all had almost been too much for him to bear.

After a few minutes, Zack was able to calm down and think clearly. He went back to analyze the area of Cloud's disappearance. The drops of blood were large and tear shaped, splattered in a "cast-off pattern." Zack had seen enough death in his life to know that this was an indication of blunt impact with a heavy object. Zack's stomach churned at the sight, and he covered his mouth to stop the regurgitated feeling of disgust from coming out. Reluctantly, he bent down closer and noticed that the blood was dry. "Shit! They probably took him at least an hour ago." He had held out hope that Cloud's abduction was recent, but the dried blood dashed his hopes.

Next he turned to the area of struggle, which was near the splattered blood. There were deep grooves in the ground that looked like heel prints. It looked as though Cloud had dug his heels into the ground in an attempt to prevent the abduction. The dirt and plant life was torn up and tossed aside, which meant that Cloud had thrashed about and tried to grab hold of the ground as they took him. Zack bit his bottom lip to hold back the tears as he realized that Cloud had fought back against his captors. He couldn't help but feel proud of his friend for fighting back. Cloud had become much stronger in spirit over the years. Even in his comatose state, he gave it his all. Unfortunately, that's probably why he was clubbed, Zack thought.

As he thought about his poor helpless friend fighting for his life, he felt a pang of guilt shoot though him and rip through his spirit. None of this would have happened if I wouldn't have been so indulgent in my own feelings, Zack thought. He quickly reminded himself that nothing would be accomplished by focusing on the past. He needed to look towards the future and focus on his current mission, finding Cloud.

Leading from the area of blood were several footprints, none of them Cloud's. He didn't know too much about footprints, but after a closer look he could tell that they weren't from Shinra-issued boots. Zack followed the footprints where they ended abruptly. Large tire tracks appeared instead, and led off into the forest. As he surveyed the distance, he noticed a clearing where a large off-road vehicle must have gone.

"That's where those bastards must have taken Cloud," he seethed with anger. "Those fuckers are going to wish they'd never taken Cloud after I'm done with them!" Taking a deep breath to collect his thoughts he said, "Alright, I just need to go fill up my water bottle, put my shirt back on, and then I'm ready to go."

Then he looked off into the distance where the vehicle had made its way through the forest. He said in a determined voice, "Hang in there Spike, I'm comin'."

~*~*~*~*~

On the brink of consciousness, Cloud stood poised over the cliff that separated his dreams and hallucinations from reality. Taking a step over the edge sent him into a sea of darkness, all encompassing. The harsh darkness faded to a gentle soothing grey, which gave way to a familiar bright light as he opened his eyes. He has been through this routine many times before. Cloud often felt trapped in his dreams and hallucinations, most of them horrifying. The unconscious realm no longer provided refuge for his psyche to recuperate. Through half-lidded eyes glazed over, Cloud saw reality with the same clarity as if looking through a foggy window. Shapes and colors could be made out, but the fine details were lost. His other senses had become more attuned to the environment. He recognized Zack mostly by his voice, smell, and touch. His thoughts were seemingly clear in the unconscious realm, but became a series of disjointed thoughts and fragmented sentiments when he entered the conscious realm.

Where am I? Cloud thought as he woke up. It was dark for a long time. . . Now I'm awake. . . My head hurts, throbbing, feels like it's going to explode. . . It's loud in here. . . Who are all these people around me? They look young, and small. . . I miss you Zack. . . I'm sorry, I'm so weak. . . I'm too much trouble to save. . . I tried to fight them, but I'm weak. . . I wish I was strong like you. . . It feels like I'm moving. . . The atmosphere feels tense. . . It smells like fear. . . I'm starting to feel nauseous. . . My throat feels full, and stomach feels strange. . . I feel sick, and head throbbing. . . The full feeling in my throat increases, burning now. . . Brown stuff comes out of my mouth. . . It burns like fire. . . My shirt is warm and wet now. . . I miss you Zack, your warmth and love, it feels good. . . I don't feel good now. . . I'm cold now Zack, so cold without you. . . It's growing darker, fading again. . . I want to visit a memory. . . You and me, together, happy. . .

~*~*~*~*~

_It was winter break, and most of Shinra's cadets had gone home for the three week break. Cloud, a Shinra cadet, stayed behind in the dorms because he didn't want to go home. His mom missed him very much because he was everything to her. Being fatherless and an only child, he was smothered with all of his mother's love and attention. Despite her overbearing nature, he cared very much about his mom and wished that he could see her during the winter break. However, life was never that simple for Cloud. He had other priorities that took precedence. He swore he'd make it into SOLDIER, or at least that's what he promised an important girl. Since he was still a Shinra cadet, he felt too embarrassed to go home and face her. _

_Being alone didn't really bother Cloud because he was the type of person that felt more alone in a crowded room than he ever did by himself. Cloud had five other roommates, but they had all gone home for the break. He wasn't especially close to any one of them, but they were friends and did some activities together, such as eating meals in the mess hall and going out around town. Cloud found that bullies were less likely to antagonize him if he traveled with a whole group of boys, so he had learned to travel in a group as much as possible._

_Hoping to get a head start on his studies for the next quarter, he decided to head on over to the library. It was a cold winter day in Midgar, so he put on his coat before heading out. The library was in the main Shinra building, which was about a ten minute walk from the dorms. As he stepped outside he was assaulted with a blast of cold winter air, which made him glad that he had remembered to wear a coat. Cloud noticed that there were only a few other people outside. He felt empowered by the solitude for it gave him time to think and sort out his thoughts about life. Keeping his gaze straight ahead, he tried to avoid eye contact with the few people he saw. Through experience, he had found it awkward to accidentally meet the gaze of a stranger, and have them stare back at you in turn. For that moment in time the other person could catch a glimpse into your soul, and Cloud disliked that feeling. _

_Unfortunately, he caught the gaze of another boy from his class. The boy was blonde with lots of freckles, kind of tall, and lanky. His name was Aden, but Cloud didn't know much else about the guy, except for the fact that he'd heard Aden had it out for him. Cloud didn't understand why someone would dislike him if they didn't know him personally. He just figured that people were weird like that. There were many subtleties about human interaction that Cloud never did seem to have a firm grasp on, including this. _

_Cloud tried to look away, but it was too late. His heart beat fast inside his chest as he saw Aden approaching. _

"_Hey punk, what are you looking at!" Aden spat._

_Cloud quickly considered his options. He could either be silent or say something back. If he was silent, Aden might interpret that as passive aggressive anger, but if he spoke he might just be adding fuel to the fire. Both options seemed to have an unpleasant consequence. However, he didn't feel like being pushed around today, so he decided to say something back. He replied in a cool tone, "Nothing."_

"_Nothing, huh?" Aden was about a foot away from Cloud now. He leaned over trying to get in Cloud's face as he said, "You think you're real smart, huh Strife?"_

_He could see the fury building in Aden's eyes. Well this is just uncomfortable, Cloud thought. Trying to ameliorate the situation he said, "No, not really."_

_Aden gave Cloud a sudden shove, which sent him reeling back. Cloud winced in pain as he struck the ground and landed hard on his backside. He knew that Aden was looking for a reaction so he just stayed still and silent. There were enough other people around that Aden probably wouldn't do anything more, at least Cloud hoped._

_With a sneer he said, "Yeah, that's what I thought. Better watch out Strife. I might not be so nice next time." _

_You weren't nice this time, Cloud thought. He stayed on the ground as Aden walked past him. Shaking his head, he got up to brush the dirt off of his jeans. He took a deep breath in, and blew out. "I guess it's just another day," he muttered under his breath. _

_Thankfully, the rest of the walk to the library had been uneventful. He got a sudden chill as he entered the main Shinra building. The sterile walls and aseptic smell had a harsh feeling. It was always a little jarring at first, but after a few minutes he seemed to adjust. He took the elevator up to the 15__th__ floor where the main library was. As he stepped inside, he noticed that it seemed emptier than usual. Before exams, it was hard to find an available seat anywhere in the library, but today he had his choice. He liked the seats next to the window because it felt less claustrophobic than the other seats, so he took one of those seats and pulled out his books. _

_He figured he'd start out by studying Materia Fusion. It was one of his least favorite subjects so he figured he'd get it out of the way. _

_After studying for about half an hour, he heard someone call his voice, "Cloud!"_

_Cloud thought, is someone talking to me? Fortunately there weren't many other guys named Cloud, so whenever someone called his name he figured they were talking to him. He looked around and saw a raven-haired man with a big grin on his face coming towards him. A small smile spread on his face as he realized the man was Zack, his SOLDIER friend._

_As he walked up to the table, Zack pointed to the chair opposite Cloud and asked, "Is this seat taken?"_

_A little nervous, Cloud stuttered, "uh, n- n- n-no sir." Cloud still really wasn't sure why Zack wanted to be friends with him. They bonded way back at their meeting in Modeoheim when Zack found out Cloud was a fellow country boy. Other than that, Cloud didn't see much else in common. Zack was everything that Cloud wasn't. He was charismatic, popular, cheerful, and a SOLDIER member, 1__st__ Class too. Cloud would give anything to be just like Zack. _

_Zack turned the chair around, and straddled it. He furrowed his brows in confusion as he asked playfully, "Hey kid, didn't I tell you not to call me 'sir' outside of classes?"_

_Cloud looked down in embarrassment as he said, "Yes sir. Wait. . . I mean Zack." The blonde was blushing at this point. _

_Zack let out a chuckle and moved his face closer to Cloud as he said, "Well, if I didn't know better, I'd say you have a little crush on me."_

_The strawberry pink in his cheeks grew brighter as Cloud realized the awkward social situation he was in. Cloud didn't have a crush on Zack, he just didn't know how to respond to a joke like that. _

_Zack liked to embarrass Cloud so he continued with a big grin, "What? You're acting like it's a bad thing." _

_Cloud scowled in distaste. He didn't feel audacious enough to insult a superior officer like Zack, at least not at the moment. So he just stuck with a dirty look that expressed his sentiment. _

_Zack got the hint, but he liked breaking down Cloud's hard exterior, so he continued with the jest. He feigned disappointment as he said, "Awww, that's too bad." With a wistful sigh he continued, "Who knows what might have been Spikey. . . "_

_Cloud couldn't help but let out a little chuckle. Zack could be so stupid, he thought, sometimes it's hard to believe he's a 1__st__ Class SOLDIER. . . _

_Zack wasn't stupid though, in fact he was really smart. He was very observant of people, and knew the best way to get a friend to open up. With Cloud, he learned that the best way to get him to relax was to act goofy and a little bit idiotic. He realized that Cloud had low self-esteem, so he tried to make Cloud feel slightly superior with his opening act. It obviously worked because he made Cloud laugh, not an easy feat of accomplishment. His methods were a secret, but he'd often wondered if Cloud had figured it out. _

_Changing the subject, the raven-haired man asked, "So, what are you doing here?"_

_Cloud raised an eyebrow slowly in confusion. Cloud thought, did Zack really not know what people did in a library? In a matter of fact voice Cloud responded in a whisper, "I'm studying."_

_Zack couldn't help but chuckle at the misunderstanding. "Noooo, I mean what are you still doing here on winter break? Why didn't you go home to that backwater town of yours, Nibelheim?"_

_Feeling a little more confident, Cloud smirked, "Well you're one to talk Mr. Gongoga." _

_Zack crossed his arms over his chest and rolled his eyes in response. He bantered back, "Well, that was a good one. Who taught you that one, your mom?" He then became serious again, and he refocused his gaze on Cloud as if waiting for an answer. _

_In a hushed voice Cloud says, "Eh, It's a long story. I'd rather not get into it."_

_Zack respected Cloud's need for privacy so he didn't push him on it, for now at least. Leaning over once again, Zack cupped a hand around his mouth and whispered, "Hey, why are we talking like this?"_

_Cloud whispered in confusion, "Talking like what?" Zack squinted an eye and tilted his head to the side. Suddenly, Cloud realized what he meant. "Oh, you mean whispering? This IS a library you know."_

"_Oh, I guess I was so excited to see you I forgot," he said in a soft voice with a smile. That earned him another smile from Cloud. He continued, "Hey, if you're not doing anything tonight, you want to watch the game at my place with Kunsel and me?" _

_It was hard for Cloud to hide his excitement. He really enjoyed hanging out with Zack. He tried to play it cool though as he said, "Ummm, I think I'm free tonight. What time?"_

"_Well the game starts at about 7 P.M. so why don't you come over at like 6:30-ish." Zack got up from the chair and turned it around to its original position. He came around to Cloud and put a hand on his shoulder as he warned him with a smile, "Don't study too hard." With a wave goodbye he said, "Alright, I guess I'll see ya later Spike."_

_Cloud nodded with a quiet, "Bye," and watched Zack walk off. As he buried his face deep in his book, he couldn't help the grin that spread from ear to ear. He could hardly focus for the next few hours. _

_~*~*~*~*~_

_Cloud showed up at Zack's place at exactly 6:30 P.M. because he didn't want to appear early and overeager, even though he was. Shoving one hand in his jean pocket, he used the other one to knock on door. _

_As the door opened, he was greeted by Zack. "Hey Cloud, c'mon in." Motioning towards the couch Zack said, "Cloud, you remember Kunsel, right?"_

_Cloud had seen Kunsel a few times before, so he was able to recognize him. He looked pleasant enough, though his features were a little large for his fine bone structure. His light brown hair was wispy and fell into layers around his face. Kunsel gave a wave of the hand as he said, "Hi Cloud."_

"_Hi," Cloud returned with a nervous wave. Cloud followed Zack over to the couch. _

_Zack sat down on the couch, which was positioned in front of a large screen TV. He took the middle position, and Cloud sat down on the other side of Zack. Cloud looked at the coffee table, and noticed the spread of pizza, chips, and soda. _

_Zack noticed Cloud eyeing the food, and in a casual voice he said, "Feel free to help yourself."_

_Cloud eyed the two dirty paper plates on the coffee table and realized that they'd both probably already eaten. He was a little shy, but his hunger was a stronger voice of reason, so he reached over for a plate and filled it up with food. _

_Kunsel leaned forward so that he could ask Cloud, "So what football team do you root for?"_

_Cloud didn't have the faintest idea about football. When Zack asked him over earlier, he was so excited that he didn't stop to ask what sport they'd be watching tonight. Trying to hide his complete ignorance of football he asked, "Well, what teams are playing tonight?"_

"_The Colts and the Eagles," Kunsel responded._

"_Oh, well I don't care for either of those two." Cloud was being honest because in all actuality he didn't know either team. He didn't want to appear lame and admit that he knew nothing about football. _

_He was relieved when Zack chimed in, "Well, Kunsel and I are both Colts fans so you can help us cheer them on."_

_Kunsel scoffed, "Yeah, they need all the help they can get this season. We're nearing the end of the season, and they've hardly won any games yet." _

_Cloud nodded in agreement thinking to himself, how hard could it be? Well, he really understood very little about the game, but he followed Zack's lead. He cheered and hollered when the Colts made successful plays, and he groaned and booed when the other team gained any advantage. It was actually more fun than he expected it to be. _

_After the third quarter of play, Kunsel said with excitement, "I think they might actually win this one!"_

_Zack turned to Cloud and playfully punched his shoulder. "I think you're good luck Spike." With a smile he added, "You're going to have to watch more games with us."_

_Keeping his eyes fixed on the game, Kunsel added in, "Yeah."_

_Cloud highly doubted he was actually a good luck charm for the team, but he was flattered that Zack and Kunsel thought so. He just smiled back in response and nodded in agreement. _

_As it turned out, the Colts ended up winning the game that night. Zack and Kunsel stood up and cheered wildly. Cloud stood up to join in with their fervent cheering. "OH YEAH! " Zack yelled. "Now that's what I'm talking about!" He turned to give Kunsel a high five, and then over to Cloud to high five him. _

_After the excitement died down, Zack asked the group, "It's still kind of early. Do you guys want to watch a movie?"_

_Kunsel replied, "Sure, what ya got?"_

"_Well, I rented this gory action flick," Zack responded as he scanned the movie summary._

"_Yeah man, that's the best kind. Bring it on!" Kunsel exclaimed with leftover excitement from the game._

_After putting the movie in, Zack sat back ready for the entertainment. Unfortunately, the overdone special effects didn't make up for the hackneyed plot. They tried to take the movie seriously at first, but the corny plot eventually got to them, and all three of them couldn't help falling into laughter. Eventually, all the excitement tired Cloud out, and he fell asleep with his head resting peacefully against the couch. _

_Kunsel nodded to Zack in Cloud's direction, "Hey, it looks like the kid fell asleep."_

_A warm smile spread over Zack's face as he noticed how innocent Cloud looked in his sleep. "I guess all the excitement wore him out." Turning to Kunsel he asked, "Did I ever tell you that Cloud's a country boy too?"_

_Laughing Kunsel responded, "I think you've finally met someone just as dorky as you."_

_Zack chuckled as he said with excitement, "Screw you! "_

_After the movie ended, Zack patted Cloud's knee and said, "Hey buddy, it's time to go home. It's kind of late so I'll walk you back to your dorm."_

_Cloud groggily agreed, and got up to leave. Zack had Cloud by his side as he and Kunsel said their goodbyes, and parted in different directions. Zack swung his arm around Cloud's shoulder and kept it there for the remaining walk home. Along the way, Cloud saw Aden in the distance. Aden scowled out of jealousy as he saw a smiling Cloud walking with Zack Fair, a 1__st__ Class SOLDIER. What was so special about Cloud, Aden thought, that a 1__st__ Class SOLDIER would want to be his friend? While Aden was under the impression that his thoughts were private, Cloud was good at reading people and understood exactly what Aden was thinking. In response he flashed a grin of pride as Aden passed them. _

_Zack noticed the strained exchange between Cloud and Aden, and said in disgust, "What's that dude's problem?" _

_Feigning ignorance he said, "I don't know." Cloud didn't want Zack fighting his battles for him. _

_As they reached Cloud's dorm, Zack said with a sigh, "Alright, I guess this is it." Zack put his arms around his friend, and pulled him into a hug. Cloud knew that Zack was a friendly guy, but he still felt awkward with such open displays of affection, so his arms remained stiff his side as Zack embraced him. It felt warm and soothing though, Cloud thought, and his stiffness faded in Zack's grip. "Goodnight Spike. I'll see ya around," Zack said with a smile and departing wave. Cloud smiled, returned the wave, and walked into his empty dorm. As he lay in bed that night, he was bathed by a warm feeling of happiness because for once he felt like he belonged. _

Summary: Well, my mom advised me to put this at the end because it gives greater continuity to the story. I think she's right so these will be moved to the end. That way you can read them after each chapter if you feel the need for an author's note. Also, I've updated chapters 2 and chapters 3. I wanted to thank my mom for helping me with the crime scene and various other things, such as the football scene. Also, I had a really hard time deciding how to write Cloud's thoughts. I wanted them to appear fragmented because I don't think he's 100% there. I read a story where Cloud's thoughts are fully coherent, and I just don't think that's the case. I think there's more going on in his head then he can communicate by mouth though. I have the rough draft of chapter 5 done, and I'll post it early next week ^_^

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, except Aden. All the rest are property of Square Enix.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Burning with the fury that only a father has for his lost child, Zack had thrown himself into the chase. Marathon running was not Zack's specialty, but he had lots of practice over the years thanks to Hojo's extreme fitness tests. Hojo would have them run on treadmills until their legs gave out from sheer exhaustion. If they didn't perform up to a certain level of expectation, they'd be punished. Thinking back on Hojo's cruel training methods, Zack quickly dismissed the positive thought that his extreme running abilities could be attributed to Hojo. While it was true that he was now able to run great distances due to Hojo's training, he and Cloud were in this dire situation all because of Hojo. Zack muttered under his breath, "I'd like to say a few things to that crazy son of a bitch, but 'thanks,' isn't one of them."

After what Zack could only assume to be a couple of hours of running straight, he had to stop to take a break. The subtle ache that started in his side had crept down and permeated the entirety of both of his legs. The cool winter chill was refreshing as it doused the heat emanating from his body. Before starting, he figured out that an off-road vehicle in the dense forest would probably be moving at about 5-10 mph. Zack could keep a good pace at about 8-10 mph, so he figured he'd eventually catch up with them if they stopped to camp early in the day. Since they picked up Cloud in the dead of the night, they'd most likely stop sometime during the day for a break. Cloud's captors had a head start of at least an hour, but Zack was confident that he could catch up with them. He slowed to a brisk watch because he didn't want the excess lactic acid to pool in his muscles.

The large off-road vehicle made a visible path through the forest so it wasn't hard for Zack to follow. He had more time to think while he was walking. I wonder who could have taken Cloud, he thought. The only thing they were really running from was Shinra. He considered the possibility of Genesis, but there would have been a trail of black feathers if he was involved. Zack continued on the same line of thought, Genesis doesn't drive off-road vehicles either. He couldn't help but snicker at the mental image that thought conjured up. An even more important question, he thought, is why would anyone take Cloud? What did they want with him? He cringed as he was flooded with painful images concerning what could have already happened to Cloud. Still breathless from hours of running, he spoke with the little air he had left in his lungs, "I hope you're okay Spike."

~*~*~*~*~

Cloud was curled up in the enclosed back of a large off-road truck. It was a large rectangular enclosure that was about six feet tall, seven feet across, and ten feet long. He wasn't alone though, for there were about ten other preteens and teens huddled up against the edge of the enclosure. Cloud lay on his side, with his arms stretched out behind him because his hands were cuffed. The other children didn't have handcuffs, but then again the other children didn't have the strength of a SOLDIER member. His feet were in shackles, like the other children, which would later be connected in a chain gang. This happened every afternoon when the children were released from the enclosure for meals and a bathroom break. It was done to prevent anyone from escaping. Also, the back of the truck was locked while it was in motion to further prevent any further runaways.

Some of the children had been held captive for a few weeks and others for only a few days. Cloud had become the latest member of this ragtag group of prisoners. The omnipresent smell of filth filled the back of the truck like a gas, invading every space possible. Attempts made to escape the stench were futile, but the children got used to it after a while. None of them had taken a bath since their capture. However, the addition of Cloud's vomit added another putrid layer of smell to their enclosed environment. It was making some of the other children nauseous themselves.

One of the children stated the obvious, "Yuck, it still smells from when he puked."

"He doesn't look so good. . ." said another.

"What's wrong with him?" a preteen girl asked the other children with worry.

Not really concerned with Cloud's welfare, a teen boy asked, "Ewww, why's the puke brown?"

"Why, what color is puke normally?" a preteen boy said in response.

"You guys are gross!?" a girl responded in disgust.

All of the children were staring curiously at Cloud, who appeared to be deep in sleep as far as they were concerned. Young adolescents are naturally curious, and since they had nothing better to do, they were transfixed with Cloud. When the children first saw him he was passed out, but then he woke up for a while, mumbled a few things, and went back to sleep. They noticed that his spiky blond hair was matted down with blood, especially towards the back of his head where he had been clubbed. Unlike the other kids, Cloud had put up a substantial fight during his capture.

"Why don't you ask what's wrong with him?" a preteen boy asked his neighbor inquisitively.

"I don't think he talks. He just seems to mumble," replied his neighbor.

"Go over and shake him," ordered the preteen boy.

"No way! He freaks me out. You go," exclaimed his neighbor.

The preteen boy asked in a cocky voice, "Dare me?"

"I double dare you," his neighbor challenged.

"Hmmmm," he agreed with a nod because he couldn't refuse a double dare. His name was Conlin, and he was the most daring of the group, although this dare wasn't that big of a challenge. He didn't really feel any sense of danger in the dare because Cloud was handcuffed and shackled.

As he crawled over to Cloud, his shackles lightly clanked against the bare metal of the truck, but Cloud didn't stir. The boy wasn't disturbed by the sight of blood on Cloud's face and hair. He was a runaway, and he's seen far worse on the city streets. Avoiding the pool of vomit near Cloud, he maneuvered himself to a clean spot next to the blonde.

In position, he slowly lifted up Cloud's heavy eyelid, but it didn't give easily like he thought it would. Wherever Cloud was, it seemed that he didn't want to come back to reality. The boy managed to open one of Cloud's eyes by applying extra pressure as he pushed up on the eyelid. Underneath, he found a deep pool of blue that was seemingly endless, like an ocean that stretched towards infinity and beyond the horizon. It glistened, glowing even, as the ocean does under the reflection of the sun. In a mixture of awe and surprise the boy said, "Whoaaaaa. . . . "

Of course, this sparked the interest of all the other children. They crawled over from their spots, each in turn to marvel at Cloud's eyes.

"Wow!"

"Cool."

"Freaky. . . "

Not all of the children crawled over to gawk at Cloud. A girl named Lilleas stayed up against the edge of the truck enclosure, refusing to be part of the spectacle. She was the eldest of the group at fourteen, but she gave the appearance of being much older. Her eyes revealed a tragic past, one that forced her to grow up much faster than any child should. Her pink dress was dingy, and looked as though it hasn't been washed in weeks. She was looking away from the crowd of children gaping at Cloud. In a voice of disgust she defended Cloud, "You guys should leave him alone."

Conlin retorted in an act of defiance, "Well, who asked you?"

She scowled in response, and glared hard at Conlin. "He's no different than us. He's scared. Remember how it was for you at first?" This obviously hit a hard spot, as Conlin released Cloud's eyelid and shifted his gaze from her to the floor. She continued, "You were scared. We all were."

"Yeah, yeah, I guess you're right," the boy said in a voice tinged with annoyance. "Alright, show's over."

The rest of the children groaned, but followed his lead as they crawled back to their previous spots.

"Hey, I didn't get to see it!" a disappointed voice piped up.

Conlin gave her a dirty look, so she crawled back to her previous spot to sit back against the edge of the enclosure.

No sooner had the children crawled back to their spots that Cloud spoke. In a much louder voice then they'd heard him use previously, he moaned, "Zaaaacccckkk. "

A hushed silence spread over the children as they all looked at each other in confusion. No one seemed sure of what to do. This was the first real word they had heard him say. All he could manage previously were a bunch of incoherent mumbles. Lilleas broke the silence, suggesting, "Maybe it's his name." She crawled over to Cloud and noticed a purplish tinge to his lips. As she placed her hand on his cheek she noticed how cold he felt, like there was ice coursing through his veins. Cloud could feel the warmth of her hand, and it reminded him of Zack's affectionate warmth. Cloud turned his face towards her hand, but he knew the hand didn't belong to Zack. Her hand was delicate and small with soft skin, while Zack's hand was much larger and callused with rough skin.

His response to her gentle touch, and the relaxed expression on his face, reminded her of her little sister back home. Her heart went out to him.

She asked him tenderly, "Zack? Is that your name?"

Cloud didn't seem to respond to the question so she asked again.

"Zack? Is he a friend?"

He still didn't respond so she turned to the group of kids and asked, "Well, what do you guys think? Does he look like a Zack?"

"I don't know, what's a Zack look like?" Conlin asked.

"What's a Conlin supposed to look like," a preteen stated in a smart-aleck fashion.

"Shut up! Smart ass. . . " Conlin cried defensively.

With a sigh Lilleas said, "Nevermind." Turning back to Cloud she said softly, "Well, since we don't know anything else about you, how about we call you Zack?"

Cloud liked the sound of his friend's name. It was more familiar and comforting at this point than his own, so he gently moaned in agreement.

Lilleas bent down to his face and brushed his cheek affectionately with the back of her fingers. "Well, it's nice to meet you Zack."

The warm touch of another human being kept him in the realm of reality. His heavy lidded eyes gently opened to their halfway stance, and he could make out her figure vaguely. She was dressed in a pink, a warm color, and her hair was honey brown.

~*~*~*~*~

Towards the front of the truck sat two rather burly men. In the driver's seat sat a bald man named Xander, and in the passenger seat was a man named Giles. Unlike Xander, he had a full head of dirty blonde hair, which made him appear less brutal in appearance. They were listening to the radio and appeared completely unfazed by the squalor in the back of the truck.

Xander had been a Shinra infantryman early in his life. After many years of failing to get into SOLDIER, the elusive dream, he dropped out and subsequently became disenchanted with life. After a string of dead-end jobs, he fell into this one, human trafficking. Even after all of these years, he still held onto his hatred for SOLDIER members. The other man, Giles, had been in and out of jail most of his young life for petty crime. He got into organized crime a little while later by selling drugs. Unfortunately for him, he wasn't very successful at it. A chance meeting with Xander in a bar was his first introduction to the world of human trafficking. It wasn't a job that anyone aspired to. Instead, it was one of those jobs that people turned to in desperation after failing at everything else in life. Through their life experiences, they had become bitter towards humanity, which made their job even easier. In a way, they felt that their job was a means of exacting revenge for a world that had shunned them. They had learned to tune out the screams and cries of the captive children. Eventually their wailing became nothing more than white noise in the background.

Due to the fact that human trafficking was illegal, it made good money. They'd managed to pay off the law enforcement of most towns, so they enjoyed a relatively free reign of terror selling teens and preteens as slaves and prostitutes. They didn't care what the children were used for, as long as they brought in good money.

"That last one was a real fighter," Giles snorted.

"That's cause he's a SOLDIER boy," Xander replied with a malicious smirk.

"No shit?! Really?," Giles asked in surprise. "I guess it was kind of dark when we found him. Wait, ain't them SOLDIERs stronger than that?"

Xander snickered, "Yeah, but we got him while he was sleepin'. Clubbed him before he could get a real punch in."

"Yeah, you clubbed that boy good! He went real limp after the second whack." Giles continued, "How much do ya think we'll get for him?"

With a corrupt gleam in his eyes, Xander looked off lustfully in the distance. "Pretty boys like him fetch a good price, if you know what I mean."

Xander then turned to his partner, his crooked lips forming a disjointed smile. This prompted a wicked laugh from Giles.

~*~*~*~*~

After a few more hours of running, the burning had permanently settled into Zack's muscles, and his body was starting to resist him. His legs felt weak, and each step was a struggle, so he reluctantly stopped to take another break. As he slowed to a brisk walk, he noticed his strength slowly returning. His body seemed to agree to this arrangement. He hoped that this break would give him the energy boost he needed to make the final push towards finding Cloud.

It was hard for him to feel anything but the pain of overexertion for the first few minutes of rest. After walking for a bit, the feelings started to come back until they flooded his sensibility. Sadness and loneliness came together, guilt next, and then anger.

Even though Cloud had only been gone for a few hours, the loneliness almost felt insufferable. The situation felt much different when he lost his beloved mentor Angeal. Even though he felt very forlorn after his untimely passing, the loss forced him to become the strong man that he was today. If Cloud were to die there would only be sorrow and the gnashing of teeth for Zack, for nothing would be gained. Without someone to fight for Zack would only become weaker.

It's unnatural for the young to die before the old. Cloud had only been alive for twenty years, if one could even call the last four years of his life living. Zack was certain that there was still more on this planet that Cloud needed to live for. After everything they had been through in the past few years, there was no one else on Gaia that understood his situation like Cloud. Over the years, their spirits had become intertwined in love and friendship. Cloud couldn't leave Gaia without taking a piece of Zack with him. Zack knew that he would never be whole again if Cloud died.

Zack felt weakened by his guilt over the possibility of Cloud's suffering. Not that Cloud's abductors knew that, but Hojo certainly did. Hojo found out in the beginning that Zack's outbursts were much stronger and more violent when Cloud was in pain. Zack was relatively immune to his own physical suffering, but Cloud's screams pierced his soul and left a gash that bled out guilt and sorrow. When the opportunity for punishment arose, Hojo would put them in situations where Zack was forced to watch Cloud experience pain. The guilt that Zack felt at his inability to help Cloud was worse than any physical pain he could experience. Seeing the blood splattered on the ground meant that Cloud was hurt somewhere, and Zack was powerless to help him at the moment.

Being the most primal of all emotions, anger was the most powerful one. In this case, Zack felt consumed by his anger over Cloud's abduction. He couldn't let his anger get out of control and hurt his judgment though, he had to remind himself of that. Shinra avoided sending SOLDIERs on missions where emotions would mar their judgment. SOLDIERs were killing machines, angels of death, not beings made to reason or feel. Although Zack once aspired to this, he never could completely embrace this ideology.

His legs felt a little better after the brief walking break, but he still felt like there was acid coursing through his blood and coating his muscles. He felt weak, and there was a small part of him that just wanted to go somewhere and rest. Once he started running again he could probably go for another few hours, but it was starting that was the problem. Summoning his deepest desire to help his friend, he reminded himself that Cloud was out there somewhere and most likely in danger. This provided the power he needed to start running again. He spoke off into the distance as though Cloud could hear him, "I'm almost there buddy, just hang in there a little longer."

~*~*~*~*~

The two men had been driving for several hours after Cloud's abduction when they decided to set up camp; it was early afternoon. They traveled by night and rested during the day, like prowlers of the night. They stopped the truck and made preparations to release the children for a bathroom break and a meal.

"A'ight, Xander you get the gun, and I'll get the keys," Giles said in a manner of fact voice as he dismounted the large truck with a grunt.

Coming around to the back of the truck, Xander got into position with the gun. He never had to use it before, but he kept it around to intimidate the children. Giles joined him, and inserted the key into the back of the truck to open the enclosure. As he opened it, he was met by ten pairs of despondent eyes and ten frowns of disgust. It didn't bother him though.

"A'ight, you all know the routine, " Giles commanded.

One by one the children got out, and their shackles were connected together in chain gang fashion. Lilleas was the last of the children to leave because she was reluctant to leave Cloud's side. However, the gun and the menacing look of Giles convinced her to come out and join the chain gang. The truck was empty, except for the large locked box of food and Cloud.

Giles reaches his head inside the truck and yelled, "Hey! Out with ya! C'mon!"

Cloud stayed curled up, knees to his chest, and eyes closed as if asleep. Giles interpreted Cloud's unresponsive state as passive aggressive defiance instead. When they abducted Cloud they just assumed that he was asleep. They didn't know about his delicate comatose condition, but in the end it probably wouldn't have made a difference because Xander had a special hatred for SOLDIERs. Xander handed his gun over to Giles and said, "The SOLDIER boy's mine." Looking towards Cloud, he growled in a deep voice, "It's personal this time."

The children watched in a mixture of horror and fascination, except for Lilleas who didn't want to watch. Her eyes were fixed on the ground in front of her, and her hands covered her ears.

The height of the enclosure was fairly tall so Xander didn't need to bend over as he made his way to Cloud. As he stared down at Cloud, in the light of day, he noticed how breathtakingly beautiful he was. It wasn't fair, he thought, a SOLDIER boy and beautiful, he was going to have to pay. . .

"Hey! Wake up!" He paused for a moment and then pulled his foot back and slammed it hard into Cloud's stomach. "Look at me you lil' bitch!"

The pain snapped Cloud back to reality. His eyes winced in pain as he tried to curl up in an attempt to defend himself. "Nnnnggggghhhh. . . ," he groaned in pain.

"I guess you didn't hear me the first time," he fumed in escalating anger. "Fuckin' look at me!"

Cloud's eyes remained winced in pain, so Xander came around to his back and kicked him over onto his stomach. He let out an involuntary yelp at the sudden harshness of the pain. Tears started to form and leak out the corners of his eyes. Cloud knew that he was at the mercy of this man, whoever he was, and he was scared. He wished Zack was here. He cried softly, "Unnnnngggghhhh. . . . "

Xander was really enjoying this now. In a mocking and overly sweet voice he bent down close to Cloud's face and said, "Awwww, does somebody want their mommy?" Unfortunately, Cloud's cries only fueled Xander's sick twisted pleasure. The power that he now had over a SOLDIER member was exhilarating. Xander had worked himself up into a frenzy, his heart making a commotion of fast unsteady beats.

Bending over to Cloud, who was lying on his belly, he grabbed a handful of the soft blonde hair and jerked his head up. "I want you to beg," he sneered.

Xander didn't expect what happened next. Cloud was even a little bit surprised himself, but enough was enough, he thought. He collected the hot wet saliva in his mouth, formed it into a ball, and spit it in Xander's face.

"You lil' bitch!" Xander let go of Cloud's head momentarily so that he could kick Cloud hard in the offending body part. As his lip split open, Cloud yelped in pain like a wounded puppy.

"Zack!!!" cried Lilleas from the background. Even though she had covered her ears, Cloud's cries of pain were loud enough to penetrate through the sound barrier she had formed with her hands.

Xander looked over and noticed that he had the rapt attention of all the children. Not wanting to disappoint, he grabbed a handful of Cloud's hair and yanked him up to his knees as he yelled, "On your knees!" Xander still held onto Cloud's hair to hold him up. In a demeaning voice he yelled, "I want you to beg, NOW!"

Cloud really had little control over his tears at the moment. He whimpered like a child that was begging for his life. His half-lidded eyes were deep pools of blue, swimming with emotions that pleaded for mercy and screamed for an end to the torture.

Turning his head over to Lilleas, Xander said in a mockingly smarmy voice, "What's wrong, don't you like the show?" Lilleas closed her eyes tight, trying to shut out the pain.

As Xander pulled his fist back, Cloud sensed the sudden movement and tried to jerk his head out of Xander's iron-fisted grip, but it was no use. A sickening thwack was made as Xander's hard knuckles made contact with Cloud's soft face, and sent him falling to the floor.

Then Xander got down and put a knee on Cloud's throat, pressing hard until he heard Cloud gagging and gasping for air. Xander whispered loudly, "Listen, you fuckin' cunt. You ain't worth shit. No one's gonna save you." After about a minute of depriving Cloud of air, he got up, bent over, and spit on his face. By this time, Cloud's body was arching in intense spasms as he gasped for air.

Cloud turned over to his side, unable to stop the tears of pain, or blood that flowed freely from his face. He hoped Xander was lying, but part of him was scared he might have been telling the truth. As his body shook violently with sobs, he couldn't help but feel that he was too pitiful to be worth saving.

Xander left him in the truck, walking out with a wan smile of accomplishment on his face. As Xander passed by Lilleas, he pulled a hand off of her ear so that she could hear him. Then he whispered right in her ear, "Your boyfriend cries like a fuckin' baby."

The brunt emotional force of his statement knocked her down to her knees. Lucky for the rest of the children, she was at the end of the chain gang so it didn't affect the line-up as she came down. Cloud's pain made her nauseous, and she couldn't fight the stuff that came out of her mouth as she threw-up in disgust. Cloud didn't do anything to anyone as far as she knew. She could still see the lingering disgust in Xander's eyes. She thought, why did he hate Cloud so much? What had Cloud done wrong in this world to deserve that kind of treatment? Life just didn't seem fair, but then again who said life was fair? Her life certainly hadn't been fair, but that didn't stop her from hoping things all worked out in the end, especially for someone as innocent-looking as Cloud.

The other children saw the whole horrific scene. Some of them were crying and others were in too much shock to have a reaction.

Xander came over to the children and said in nonchalant voice, as if nothing had happened, "A'ight, let's move out. Time to get some grub."

As Lilleas stood up, she took a lingering look at Cloud. His twinkling blue eyes were closed tightly in pain, and his face looked like a mess of crimson, blonde hair, and porcelain skin. She began retching once again. Her insides shook violently as her body struggled to produce the bile to actually vomit.

~*~*~*~*~

From the distance, a greenish silver object suddenly appeared in the path of the trail. At first Zack thought that it might be a strange looking tree or bush, but as he came up closer he realized it was a truck. It had large tires that matched the ones he had found at the beginning of the path.

"Oh Gaia!" he exclaimed. He couldn't believe that he was actually here. Now he had to come up with a plan of attack. His mind had been so muddled earlier with emotions that it was hard to think straight. There were a bunch of trees to the left of the truck. He figured he would hide behind the trees and check things out before he attacked. Zack figured the people who took Cloud must be somewhere near the truck.

As he ducked behind the trees, he was taken aback by what he saw. About one hundred feet from where he was, there was a group of preteen children shackled to each other. Before he could investigate further he heard soft crying noises, and it sounded very close in proximity.

"Huh? What's that?" he said as he stood up looking around. "Maybe it's coming from inside that truck." He carefully crept around to the back of the truck and saw a person curled up in a ball on the floor, a mess of blonde spikes in clear view.

"Holy Sh-- -----!" he screamed as he clamped his hand over his mouth. He suddenly remembered Cloud captors were close by, and he didn't want to be heard. His eyes opened wide as he took in the abject horror of the scene. Cloud looked like a porcelain doll, tortured and then tossed aside by a sadistic child. Zack froze for a moment, temporarily paralyzed by fear and revulsion, as he looked on at the horrible scene. The hold his mind had over his body only lasted a few seconds before he was able to break away and run over to his friend.

As he came closer to Cloud, he noticed his friend was shaking with fear, like an abused animal approached by a well-intentioned human being. Zack felt his heart shatter as he realized that Cloud thought he was the abuser. As he scooped up the broken and battered body of his friend, he pulled him close and said tenderly, "Spikey! It's me, Zack." Cloud seemed to understand and his lithe body melted into Zack's form. Zack had his legs outstretched on the floor of the truck as he held Cloud in his lap. He clutched Cloud's head against his chest, and wrapped the other arm securely around his waist. Zack felt his eyes growing heavy with sadness, and pressed his face into Cloud's soft mess of blonde spikes. The sweet musk of Cloud's hair, marred by the stale smell of blood, and sour smell of fear, brought out hot gushing tears from Zack. That's when he noticed the gash on the back of Cloud's head where he was clubbed. Choking on his own tears, he pulled back, and with a note of horror in his voice he whispered, "Cloud, what did they do to you?" Cloud whimpered in response and turned to bury his face in Zack's chest. Sensing that his friend didn't want to talk about it, Zack tried to comfort him by slowly running his fingers through Cloud's hair. Zack reassured him in a soothing voice, "It's okay buddy, I'm here now. I'm not going to let them hurt you again." Cloud acknowledged Zack's warm presence by nuzzling him under the chin. Eyes still dewy with tears of sadness, Zack bent down to kiss the top of Cloud's head. His voice rich with guilt and empathy he said, "I'm so sorry Spike, I never should have left you. . ." Zack closed his eyes, and pulled Cloud into a tighter embrace as he gently whispered, "Please forgive me."

After letting Zack hold him for a few minutes, Cloud decided that he wanted to express his sentiments to Zack. Since he was unable to return Zack's hug because of the handcuffs, he reached his head up and mumbled something affectionate in Zack's ear. Usually Zack understood what Cloud meant by his many different groans and mumbles, but it was hard for Cloud to speak because of his split lip. Bending his head down to make it easier for Cloud to speak, Zack asked, "Huh? What's that Spike?" Cloud mumbled it again, but Zack understood him this time. A smile spread over his face as he said warmly, "I love you too Cloud, more than you'll ever know."

Zack noticed the dried blood that blemished Cloud's face and felt the need to clean him up. He spit into one of his hands, and rubbed it into Cloud's closest cheek in an attempt to wipe the dried blood away. "What am I going to do with you Spike? You're always so messy," he chided.

"Unnnnngh," Cloud groaned and turned his face away in childish protest.

Zack wiped the mess on his pants, and started the process again. "C'mon, hold still. I'm almost done," he said reaching over to Cloud's other cheek. Frowning in disapproval he said, "Hmmm, you still look pretty messed up." That's when he noticed the dried vomit on Cloud's shirt, and the blood on his own shirt from where Cloud pressed his face. He laughed a little as he said, "Well I guess we're both going to have to clean up."

Noticing Cloud's sunken eyes and dry skin, Zack realized Cloud was probably dehydrated. "Hang on Spike, I have to put you down for a second," he said as he gently placed his friend down beside him. Then he pulled the large water bottle out of his backpack. He managed to save about a third of the water for when he found his friend. With a grunt he picked his friend back up and shook his head, "Just as heavy as ever Spike." Cloud couldn't form a seal around the tip of the water bottle because of his split lip, so Zack squirted it into Cloud's open mouth. Cloud greedily drank down the water, hardly pausing to swallow. With a tender smile Zack said, "Poor kid, you were pretty thirsty." Putting the empty water bottle down, Zack squeezed his friend tightly as he whispered to him, "I really missed you Spike."

Soaking in the warmth of the moment, Zack didn't want to leave his friend. Reluctantly, he picked his friend up and gently sat him upright against the corner of the large enclosure. Cloud's relaxed expression turned tense as Zack left his side. Trying to reassure him, Zack said, "Hang on Spike, I've got some business to take care of." Ruffling Cloud's hair, he tried to smile through a strained face as he said, "Don't worry, I'll be right back."

As if reading Cloud's mind, Zack answered back with a nod of the head, "Promise."

**Author's Note:** I hope I didn't make anyone wait too long for this chapter! Sorry, there's some Cloud abuse here. Well that was kind of a given since he was kidnapped. I thought about putting a warning at the top, but that would have spoiled the surprise. I will probably have other scenes with violence, but if they're really graphic I'll put a warning. I don't think I'll do anything too graphic though. I like Cloud and Zack too much :P I felt bad for Cloud as I was writing it. Poor Cloud  Ha, ha, the next chapter will most likely be quite a bit lighter. "Chapter 5" felt really heavy to me emotionally. Then again I was listening to sad music as I wrote most of it. This chapter was harder to write than the others. I knew what I wanted to say for this chapter, but it was hard to phrase it. I wanted to thank my mom for her help with this chapter. She helped me rephrase some of the awkward sentences. Lol, she knows more about Zack and Cloud now then she ever wanted to. My mom also came up with the name Lilleas. I thought it was a really cool sounding fantasy name, it kind of sounds like Legolas. Conlin, and Giles are both Gaelic names. I actually teach ballet to children, ages 5-18, so writing the dialogue of the children was kind of fun. My favorite part of the chapter though is where Zack finds Cloud. That part was surprisingly hard to write because I wanted to make it sweet without being sappy. I hope I succeeded ^_^ So what did you think? Please let me know!

**Disclaimer: **Zack, Cloud, Angeal, and Genesis are the property of Square Enix. Everyone else is mine though :P


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"Now, time to get down to business," Zack said as he pounded his fist into his other hand. He quickly hopped out of the truck enclosure and ducked behind the nearest tree. With a sigh, he realized that he still didn't have a plan of attack. He was almost certain that it was those two burly men in the distance that were responsible for Cloud's abduction. Not being in the mood to ask questions, Zack decided to stick with that assumption. It didn't matter which one of them had actually abused his friend, they were both equally guilty in his eyes. If it was only one of them that had abused Cloud, then the other must have enabled it, which was almost just as bad.

Angeal had taught Zack to kill clean and quickly without torture, but Zack didn't know if he could control himself in this situation. There was a strong feral desire within him, waiting to leap out of the cage, that desired revenge. He wanted to slowly draw his sword down their bodies from sternum to pelvis, and watch their faces grimace in pain as he sliced through them like butter. After their innards fell out, he'd smash their heads in, just like they did to his poor friend. To add insult to injury, if they were still alive he'd ask them how it felt. He slightly shuddered at the ruthlessness of his barbaric thoughts. Of course, what people want to do and what they actually do, are two different things. He had too much honor to betray himself in that manner. Torture would make him no better than Cloud's captors, or Hojo for that matter. Zack cringed at the notion that he came so close to such brutality.

He noticed that the two men, whom he'd conveniently dubbed Bastard A and Bastard B, were sitting on two comfy cushions opposite the shackled children, who were sitting on the cold hard ground. How considerate of them, Zack thought sardonically. From the distance he could make out a metallic silver gleam in the hands of one of the men. He figured it was either a knife or a handgun. A knife wouldn't be a big deal, but a gun would pose a bit more of a problem. In any case, he reasoned that a surprise attack would work best since they weren't expecting him. Lucky for Zack, the area was surrounded by trees. Deep in thought, he ran a hand through his thick mop of black spikes, and quietly said, "If I could climb up into one of those trees, I could do a surprise attack on those bastards from above." It would be too conspicuous to just walk around in a circle and climb up a tree. One of the children would probably see him and make some reaction to give him away. He'd have to run out some distance, and then walk around in a circle until he was lined up with the two men. Then he could sneak up to a tree close behind them and climb all the way up.

Putting his plan into action, he first put down his backpack because he didn't want that to be a hindrance during the attack. Then he carefully walked away from his current position, rolling through his feet from toe to heel. He'd been taught years ago, in basic SOLDIER training, how to walk quietly and evade expectant enemy forces. By slowly rolling through the foot it distributed the weight in a manner that the full weight of the body didn't come down on the ground at once.

Cautiously, he made his way around to his target destination. He let out a carefully held breath at the realization that no one had seen him yet. He'd picked this particular tree because it was a big solid oak with hearty limbs. Since he didn't have claws, like most tree-climbing animals, he had to use his sheer strength to wrap his arms and legs around the tree. The trunk was too big in circumference for him to wrap the entirety of his arms and legs around it, but he could get himself around enough of it for a good grip. Slowly but carefully, he crawled up the tree until he got to a sturdy branch, one that could support his weight. Lifting himself up to the branch, he noticed that his hands and arms were scratched up from the bark and had just started to bleed. He was too full of adrenaline to feel the pain; it was just an emotionless observation.

Balancing himself on the tree with one hand, he could see the scene below. The feeling was slightly surreal, like he was watching a movie, but this was reality instead. It looked like all of the children were occupied with something in their laps. They must be eating, he thought. Just then, he saw one of the children look up towards him. Zack was just as surprised as the preteen was, so they both stared at each other with a slightly open mouth, raised eyebrows, and wide open eyes.

"Damn!" Zack cursed himself. He'd done his best to conceal himself up until this point. He hadn't really counted on the children spotting him once he was up in the tree. He tried to wave his free hand in an exaggerated motion to stop the boy from spreading the news. Unfortunately, it was too late because the boy had already ribbed his friend and motioned above to Zack. Like a chain reaction, one by one, the children looked up above to see Zack, the strange man in the tree. If that wasn't bad enough, the whispering and pointing started. Zack realized the hand waving wasn't getting him anywhere, so he tried to put his finger over his lips in a shushing motion. This quieted some of the children, but they had already gotten the attention of Xander and Giles.

The children didn't frequently misbehave, so Xander knew something was amiss to have disturbed them so greatly. He was in an extra foul mood after expending all of his energy on Cloud earlier in the day, so he said in an irritated voice, "Hey, what's goin' on?"

Xander's voice startled Zack, and he momentarily lost his balance. He waved both of his arms in a desperate attempt to regain his balance, but he waved his right arm a little more than his left, and he became lopsided. As his upper body started to fall back, his feet slipped out from under him. He fell, reaching both hands up in desperation, and caught himself on the branch below.

Xander and Giles both looked up in the direction that the children were looking in.

With squinted eyes to block out the sun, Xander looked up and saw someone hanging from a tree. "What on Gaia is that?" Xander asked in perturbed confusion.

"I don't know, but it looks like a man," Giles replied in an uncertain tone.

So much for the surprise attack, Zack thought with bitterness. "Well, it's now or never," he muttered to himself. He needed to move fast because he was currently nothing more than a hanging target. He needed to seize the moment of confusion, and use it to his advantage. He repositioned his hands on the branch so that he had a good grip before he started to swing. The limb was still pretty thick so it could probably support his weight as he swung back and forth, or at least that's what he was counting on. After a few swings he had gained enough height and momentum to release the branch and do an aerial back tuck. He landed gracefully on both feet, inspiring applause from his audience of children.

Xander's eyes went wide, and his pupils shrank, in dread of the oncoming onslaught. He knew that he was no match for a SOLDIER in a fully conscious state.

As Xander turned to run, Zack pulled out his Buster Sword and got into his attack stance. Furrowing his eyebrows in anger, he growled, "It's payback time!"

Zack went charging after Giles first. Giles went to pull out his gun, but he was far slower than Zack, who had lightning quick reflexes. Before he could get a shot out, Zack was right in front of him with his sword cocked back. Giles had been so preoccupied with attacking Zack, that he had left himself totally open for attack. Zack swung his sword, steel whistling through the air, and made a clean sweep through Giles abdomen. Giles screamed horrifically, in a manner that was sure to give the children nightmares, as the sword cut through him. Blood splattered everywhere in crimson tear drops, coating both Giles and Zack. Without pausing, Zack looked up to find his next target, but he was gone.

"Over there!" one of the boys screamed and pointed towards the truck

"Hurry!" another girl screamed in panic.

"He's getting away!" cried another boy in frustration.

Zack looked over to where the boy was pointing and saw that Xander was running towards the truck. "Shit! Cloud's in there!" Zack screamed in alarm. He quickly sheathed his Buster Sword so that he could run as fast as SOLDIERly possible. Shooting his legs out in front of him, he quickly gained speed until he was at a full sprint. Xander had managed to find the keys, but in his panic, he was fumbling for the right one. After a short hassle, he found it, stepped on the ledge, and opened the driver's door.

Zack was now right behind Xander, facing his back. Jumping up, Zack grabbed the collar of Xander's shirt and yanked him down on the ground. Xander landed with a hard thud that knocked the air out of him. He let out a loud groan and clenched his arms over his stomach as he curled up in pain. Something about his moan sounded so uniquely human that it momentarily startled Zack. It penetrated deep into his conscience, interfering with his thoughts of justice and revenge. He quickly reminded himself that death was penance for this man who had harmed so many, including his dear friend Cloud. As Zack raised his sword up high above his head, Xander turned to look at Zack. Xander's eyes were pleading for mercy and pitifully begging for his life. It was too late though because Zack had already decided his fate. As the sword came down, Xander shut his eyes tight and raised his hands to cover his face. Zack had been planning on slicing through the man's throat to give him the quickest death possible, but he didn't have enough force to slice through both the arms and the neck. As a consequence, the sword sliced all the way through his arms that were covering his neck, but stopped halfway through his neck. Xander made a sick choking sound as Zack pulled the sword out of him, and raised it up high for the final blow. The second blow made a clean cut, and Xander's head flew back from the force and away from his body.

Zack didn't usually feel guilty after killing his victims, but he usually killed them before they could plead for their lives. In a show of remorse, Zack hung his head low and quickly apologized to Xander's remains. Then he picked up the keys on the ground. There were a bunch of keys, so he reasoned that the keys to Cloud's handcuffs must be on the keychain.

Putting his guilt behind him, he quickly ran to the back of the truck enclosure to free his friend. In all of the pandemonium, Zack had forgotten about Cloud's delicate condition and ran up to him with keys jangling. The loud and sudden noise scared Cloud, and he quickly ducked his head into his knees and started trembling in fear. Once again, Cloud thought Zack was either Xander or Giles.

Zack crouched down on his knees right beside his friend. Excited to see his friend, Zack exclaimed with a smile, "Hey buddy, it's me!" He could see that Cloud's expression was still tense with fear, so he reached a hand out and ruffled his hair. Cloud slowly opened his eyes, and through the haze he made out a smiling face with dark hair. His grimace slowly turned into an expression of relief as he realized that it was Zack beside him and not Xander or Giles. Looking over at his friend, Zack said softly, "I'm going to set you free, okay?" As Zack went to try the different keys in the handcuffs, he noticed that Cloud's fists were clenched and slightly trembling. Zack scowled to himself, "Those bastards really messed you up. Not like you weren't already traumatized enough."

Zack had to try about three different keys before he found the right one. Cloud's arms reflexively swung down to his sides. Zack pushed Cloud up close to the edge of the enclosure so that he wouldn't fall backwards as he worked on finding the right key for the shackles. Much to his delight, he got it on the first try.

Clearly more excited than Cloud, Zack exclaimed, "Hey Spike, you're finally free!" Cloud was only vaguely conscious of the fact that he was no longer bound. Zack sat down next to his friend, and pulled him up into his lap with a grunt, "Ooooof." Cloud really wasn't that heavy, but Zack still liked to tease him about it. He playfully ordered his friend, "C'mon, give me a hug." Cloud's lifeless body remained deathly still in Zack's arms, so Zack pulled him into a tight embrace. Cloud's head fell languidly over Zack's shoulder. With their chests pressed together, Zack could feel Cloud's tremulous heartbeat thump softly against his strong anxious one. Zack still hadn't calmed down from the whole ordeal, and the adrenaline was still coursing thick through his body. The slow and steady movement of Cloud's chest, like an undulating wave, felt very soothing to Zack. Slowly, both of their hearts calmed, eventually beating together in the same rhythm. For the moment, it felt like they were one person, with one heartbeat. Cloud let out a gentle sigh of contentment, and Zack smiled. He closed his eyes to concentrate on the intimate feeling of two hearts chained together into one. Zack wasn't the sappy sort like Genesis, but with Cloud's heart beating in time to his, he couldn't help but feel they were bound to each other by fate.

After remaining like that for a while, Zack suddenly remembered the children. He still had to free them. With a mild sense of urgency in his voice he said, "C'mon Spike, we've got to free the rest of the kids." Zack hadn't thoroughly inspected Cloud for damage, but he had a strong inkling that there were multiple sores and bruises on the rest of his body. For this reason he was trying to be gentler than usual, so instead of throwing Cloud over his shoulders, he scooped him up like a child. Cloud's head slumped against Zack's chest, and they took off towards the children.

Surprisingly, he found them exactly where he had left them. He thought they would have been more eager about their freedom and done something like search him out for the key. Maybe they were scared of him, he thought. He did just savagely murder someone in front of them with a sword that was larger than most of them. Even if that man was their enemy, he was still a human that Zack had brutally murdered.

Before Zack could get much deeper into his reasoning, Conlin spoke up and broke the silence. His voice was hollow and devoid of emotion, "Are they really dead?"

Zack nodded his head and replied with an affirmative, "Yeah." That's when Zack noticed that the children were all very pale, and looked like they were in a state of shock. Trying to comfort them he smiled and said, "I have the key, so I'm going set you guys free now."

He looked around for something to prop Cloud up against and found a tree nearby that was in his field of vision. Since Cloud's abduction, Zack wanted to keep an even closer eye on Cloud. After setting Cloud against a tree, he went back to free the children. He started at the back of the chain gang with the child closest to him, it was Lilleas. As soon as she had been freed, she ran over to Cloud and kneeled by his side. She reached out and held his hand, but he didn't respond to her touch like he had done a while ago. A worried maternal look came over her face, but she kept a firm grip on his hand and stayed kneeling by his side. Zack was too busy freeing the children to notice Lilleas' interaction with Cloud.

Each child's reaction to their newfound freedom was slightly different, but they all had two things in common, amazement and disbelief. They reacted with incredulity towards their legs, like a baby fawn taking their first few steps. Picking up each limb with wonder, they carefully took their first few steps unrestrained. It wasn't long before the color was restored to their faces, and they were jumping up and down, cheering like the children they were. Zack stood back for a second, crossed his arms, and let a big grin cross his face. It had been quite a few years since he had seen such simple joy. With his own freedom from the lab, he'd been beaten down for far too long to be joyful about it. What was there to be happy about? His best friend was comatose and he was a broken man struggling to hold it together. All of his friends and family had assumed he was dead and probably moved on. With his escape he felt reclamation, like an abused animal feels once they've been freed from their abuser, but there's no joy in the act. He was happy that he had gotten to these children before they'd been broken. Leaving them to continue in their merriment, he walked over to Cloud.

To his surprise, one of the children was already there with Cloud, kneeling beside him and holding his hand. Zack got down beside the pair in a squatting position. He saw the look of worry on her face as she asked, "Is Zack going to be okay?"

He squinted his eyes at her and tilted his head in confusion. Zack didn't know if he should laugh at the sheer absurdity of the situation, or whether he should take her seriously. Instead, he went for something in the middle. With a smile he asked, "Wait, how'd you know his name was Zack?"

She looked down at the ground, recalling the memory in vivid detail, "Well, it was the only word he actually spoke, so we just figured that was his name."

Zack brought a hand up over his face to shield his sudden change of emotion. Cloud had called for Zack in one of his darkest moments. His eyes started to water a little bit, but he couldn't reveal too much to this girl about their identities. She seemed like a very trustworthy person, but he couldn't be too careful. Pulling his hand down so that it now rested on his chin he said in a thoughtful voice, "Well, Zack is a good friend of his from back home. He must miss him a lot."

Looking wistfully off into the distance, she nodded, "Hmmm." Continuing she said, "So what's his real name?"

"His real name?" Zack said with a surprised lilt at the end. He used the question to help stall until he could come up with an answer. He blurted the first name that popped into his head, "Angeal." Confirming his answer he said, "Yeah, Angeal's his name." I wouldn't be surprised if the poor kid has some major identity issues later, Zack smirked to himself.

Lilleas was too occupied with Cloud to notice Zack's slightly suspicious behavior. Brushing the bangs out of Cloud's face, she said tenderly, "That's a pretty name, much better than Zack. It sounds like angel. He kind of looks like one, even with all of his wounds. More like a fallen angel in this state."

Zack didn't really hear anything after she implied that Zack wasn't a good name. Zack had always liked his name. In fact, he'd never heard anyone say something so preposterous. Aerith had even told him that Zack was a cute name, and Aerith wouldn't lie about something like that just to boost his confidence, would she? He couldn't help himself as he spouted off, "Wait, what's wrong with the name Zack?"

With a look of confusion on her face she said, "Well it's just so ordinary." Lilleas couldn't understand why he was so upset about a random name.

Realizing he was starting to blow his cover, he said, "Well, I LIKE the name Zack, but Angeal is a nice name too." In a matter-of-fact voice he said, "If you don't mind, Angeal and I have to go get cleaned up."

She let out a little giggle as she asked, "Would you mind if I helped?"

Zack chuckled in response, and jokingly said, "It's okay with me, but why don't you ask Angeal? He's the modest one." He didn't think Cloud would actually approve if he was awake, but he didn't see the harm in it.

Being the sincere person that she was, Lilleas actually took him seriously. "Angeal, would you mind if I helped you clean up?" She paused, waiting for an answer. Cloud remained silent, but she nodded her head in agreement as though he actually answered her. Turning towards Zack, she smiled and said cheerfully, "He said he doesn't mind."

Zack knew Cloud, and he was pretty certain that his friend hadn't actually answered her, but she was a nice girl so he thought he'd play along. He laughed and shook his head in mild disbelief, "Does he now?" He continued, "Alright, well I'm going to go get my bucket and towel. Why don't you watch Angeal for me, and I'll be right back."

Turning to go get the stuff from his backpack, he noticed the rest of the children and how dirty they were. They were fairly loud in their laughing and conversation, so he cupped a hand over his mouth and loudly cried, "Yo! Over here!" Once he had their attention, he turned to them and offered, "My friend and I are going to go find a stream and wash up. Anyone want to join us?"

A few children stepped forward, so he continued, "Even though the sun is out today, the water's really cold. I just wanted to warn ya." There were only three children that were willing to go after his warning, and all three were boys.

"Just let me get a few things, and then we'll go," he said to them. As he made his way over to his backpack, he second guessed himself and decided to take the backpack with him. He couldn't afford to lose their meager food supply.

Coming back over to the kids, the three children eagerly followed him, and they all made their way over to Lilleas and Cloud. He bent over to pick up Cloud in the same fashion as before. "Okay guys, let's go," he said as he started to lead the way.

It wasn't long before Lilleas joined his side and started to ask questions once again. "So, what's your name?"

With a chuckle he said, "You sure ask a lot of questions."

Lilleas stayed silent, looking up at him, still waiting for an answer.

I guess I'm not getting off that easy, he thought. Stammering he said, "Uh, well, ummm, my name's Kunsel."

Sticking her tongue out in disgust, Lilleas said, "Kunsel? That's even worse than Zack."

He couldn't help but chuckle. As much as Zack liked his friend Kunsel, he didn't have any special attachment to the name. Teasingly he said, "I bet if Angeal here was named Kunsel, you'd think it was a nice name."

"No I wouldn't!" she exclaimed in a defensive tone that was much stronger than she intended. She quickly turned her face away to hide her blushing cheeks.

This brought out an even heartier laugh from Zack. If he didn't see it before, he definitely saw it now. Lilleas had a crush on Cloud. He made a mental note to tease Cloud about it later. As far as Cloud was concerned, Zack was pretty sure he still had it bad for that girl in Nibelheim, Tifa. In addition to that, Cloud was way older than this girl. She must have mistaken his innocent look for youth. Young love was funny, he mused to himself. This girl didn't even know anything about Cloud, including his real name. Maybe she liked the dark, brooding, insecure, and mildly antisocial type. Somebody had to, he reasoned. Feeling a little embarrassed for her, he tried to change the subject. "So, what's your name?"

She proudly stated, "Lilleas."

Scratching his chin he said, "Hmmm, I don't know." With a big grin he continued, "If you ask me, that's worse than Kunsel."

"You're horrible!" she cried as she crossed her arms, and threw a pout on her face. To demonstrate her annoyance, she slowed her pace until she was behind Zack, walking with the other three kids.

Zack let out a sigh, she was just a teen, and she already had the upper hand on him. He'd forgotten how difficult women could be. Aerith had pulled the same thing on him quite a few times to get her way. The sad thing was that it almost always worked. Monsters and bad guys he could fight, but women were a different story. Like most men, he found himself powerless against their wiles and sad pouty-faces.

He kept walking, but he turned his head back and apologized. "Hey, c'mon! I was only teasing." Zack could see that she was still wavering in her decision about whether or not to forgive him so he threw on his best puppy dog face of guilt. It was his secret weapon against men and women alike. He only used it as a last resort, but it had a high success rate of getting what he wanted when used correctly.

"Oh, alright," she said with slight displeasure in her voice as she came up to join him. She decided to still wear a frown though, because she couldn't let him get off THAT easy.

One of the boys from the back said in awe, "Hey man, that's an awesome sword! Do you think I could hold it later?"

Zack knew that his mentor Angeal would be most upset if he did such a thing, wherever he was. With a slight chuckle he said, "How about, NO!"

"Awww, come on. Please!!!" the boy pleaded.

Zack turned around to face the boy, and started walking backwards. In a slightly serious tone he lowered his voice and said, "Do you really want to argue with some dude that has a big sword strapped to his back?"

The boy couldn't argue with that line of reasoning. Zack smiled and said in an I-told-you so voice, "I didn't think so."

He turned back around and continued with their trek for a water source.

"So do you actually know where we're going?" one of the boys asked.

"Kind of," he lied. He didn't want to actually admit that they were just randomly walking until a water source appeared.

"Oh okay," the boy replied in disappointment. "So is your friend going to be okay?" he asked curiously.

Looking down at his friend, Zack noticed that Cloud's head was slightly turned in towards his chest, and he had a peaceful expression on his face. His eyes were closed, which meant that he was either sleeping or completely out of it again. Wherever Cloud was, Zack was just glad he wasn't in pain at the moment. Still looking down at Cloud, he replied in a solemn voice. "Yeah, he's pretty tough. Those bastards roughed him up pretty good though. "

The boy replied in a somber tone, "We saw the whole thing."

Zack's heart seized at the painful image of Cloud being abused, and he clutched his friend closer to his body. He gritted his teeth in pain like he was living vicariously through Cloud's painful memories. He didn't notice that his feet had stopped, but the other children did. They halted and stood by him as they waited on bated breath for his next words.

With a painful sigh Zack said, "Well, it's all over now."

Lilleas came over and gently laid a hand on Cloud's cheek. She looked up at Zack as she said, "It looks like he's sleeping."

Nodding his head in agreement, he said, "Yeah, I think so." Changing his tone into one of determination he said, "Alright, let's keep moving."

It was another half hour of walking before they found a water source. One of the children pointed it out. It was a fairly shallow creek, which looked like it would only come up to Zack's knees, but it would still work. The three preteens took off running and jumped in.

"Aaaaaaah, it's cold!" one of them yelped. Soon enough, they started splashing each other and running around, chasing each other in the creek.

"Hey, be careful!" Zack warned. He highly doubted that they would heed his warning, but he figured they'd be okay because the creek wasn't very deep and the current wasn't very fast. Setting Cloud down on the ground he asked Lilleas, "Could you fill this bucket up with water?"

She nodded sharply, indicating her understanding of the significance of this task. Taking the bucket in hand, she went down by the creek bed and filled it up with water. She hurried back to Zack, who had already started taking Cloud's shoulder pads and suspenders off. Zack took the bucket and set it down. Then he started pulling the shirt off of Cloud. Lilleas giggled as the turtleneck got stuck over his head. "Here's the shirt. If you could wash that off please," he said pointing to the large vomit stain that couldn't be missed. Zack was surprised that she didn't appear disgusted by the vomit stain. Instead, she rushed off to the edge of the creek to try her best to remove the stain with only water.

There were bruises littered over the vast alabaster canvas of Cloud's body. Zack noticed a particularly large one on Cloud's stomach that extended to his bottom few ribs. It was deep purple in the center, and faded out to a sickly green color at the edge. Zack laid Cloud's head down on the towel, and kneeled beside his friend's stomach. In a playful voice he said, "Doctor Zack is at your service. " With a wan smile he apologized to Cloud, "Sorry my medical training only consists of an elective class, but it's all we have right now." Remembering something else he added in positively, "I've had lots of on the job training though."

"I'll try to be gentle, but tell me if this hurts," Zack said as he carefully palpated each of Cloud's ribs. Much to his relief, Cloud didn't yelp in pain. "You got lucky kid. It looks like you don't have any broken ribs. Let's just hope you don't have any internal bleeding from that kick to the gut." Moving up Cloud's body he noticed the bruises on his neck. In a tone of dark sarcasm he said, "Well, that's going to making eating fun." Sitting back down, in cross-legged fashion, he put Cloud's head in his lap. Brushing the bangs out of Cloud's face, he noticed the extensive damage done to Cloud's face. There was a thin coating of smeared blood, all over his face, from when Zack had attempted to clean him up earlier. In addition, he had a split lip and a black eye. Remembering the gash from earlier, Zack turned Cloud's head to the side to get a closer look at the back of his head. Much to his chagrin, it was worse than he had remembered it. The blonde hair was worn away in the spot, which must have come off with the skin. Through the deep crimson color he caught a slight glimpse of white. "Is that bone?! Damn! We better treat that fast. That's going to need stitches and some sort of antibiotic ointment or its going to get infected." Zack hoped that the Mako and Jenova cells would make Cloud's body an inhospitable environment for another organism like bacteria, but he wasn't sure. Zack knew that if Cloud got sepsis, a systemic infection, he would be in serious trouble.

In deep concentration, Zack muttered, "Stitches. Where on Gaia am I going to get you stitched up. I can't exactly bring you into a doctor. They keep permanent medical records that could be traced. I guess I'm going to have to do it, but how?" Just then he was interrupted by Lilleas as she came back with a wet shirt that only had the faint remnant of a vomit stain. "Looks like he got some on his pants too," Zack said shaking his head, more so in disapproval of the situation than of Cloud. Zack knew that none of this was Cloud's fault.

That's when he noticed Lilleas staring down at Cloud with hungry eyes. She hadn't meant to stare, but even the blotchy bruises and sores couldn't hide Cloud's gorgeous physique. Lilleas had never seen anything quite like Cloud before. With soft ivory skin stretched taut over chiseled muscles, and soft supple lips pursed in a subtle pout, he looked both delicate and masculine. She wanted to devour and cuddle him at the same time. It wasn't completely her fault for being so smitten with Cloud, for he often inspired those feelings from people. Zack felt a little uncomfortable with the way Lilleas was staring at his friend, and he sure as hell bet that Cloud would be most uncomfortable if he knew what was going on. "Why don't you turn around for a minute? Angeal's shy about these things," he commanded.

She was obedient, and quickly turned around. Zack quickly undid Cloud's pants, and then he started to remove his own clothing. His pants were clean, so he would lend them to Cloud for the time being. After undressing himself, Zack was naked except for his boxers, but Cloud was only exposed from the waist up. He handed the rest of the garments to Lilleas and thanked her.

Cloud's head was in his lap, so he put his hands on both sides of Cloud's face and looked at him upside down. Empathetically he said, "Don't worry Spike, I've got your back. I know how embarrassed you get around girls." Cloud didn't talk much about his love life, but Zack could guess he probably hadn't gotten very far with any girls. Most guys were more than willing to brag about their relationships, so being silent on the issue usually meant a guy wasn't getting much action. Zack let out a hearty chuckle, "I can't let you die yet while you're still a virgin. What kind of friend would that make me?"

Being a ladies' man himself, Zack had tried to boost Cloud's confidence about the issue, but Cloud was still as painfully shy as ever. When pressed on the issue, the only girl Cloud ever seemed to talk about was Tifa. Zack could only hope she was still alive after the Nibelheim incident. Giving Cloud's face a quick pat he said, "There's a special girl out there somewhere for you. Who knows, maybe it's that girl you like, Tifa."

Dipping the rag into the frigid water he wrung it out before placing it on Cloud. To his surprise, Cloud had no reaction. "You're really out of it, huh Spike?" Zack didn't expect a response from Cloud this time, but he still talked to him nonetheless. "This will go much quicker without you fighting me," he said as he started to wipe the dried blood from Cloud's face. Dipping the dirty rag back into the clear water, the blood came off the rag and swirled around in a pretty pattern in the water. This time he didn't wring the rag out because he needed to give Cloud's mop of hair a good rinse down. After Cloud's hair was thoroughly wet, Zack got his fingers deep into the scalp and massaged it. This action brought out a little closed-mouth smile from Cloud. Zack laughed and said, "I thought you were completely out of it. I guess you really like this, huh?"

After he had cleaned Cloud up, Zack dipped the rag into the now light pink water, and he wiped off the blood that splattered on him from earlier.

Lilleas came over at about this time, and she handed over Zack's wet shirt and Cloud's pants. Looking up at her, blue orbs filled with gratitude, he said, "Thanks. You were a big help."

She sat down beside Cloud and held his hand. "How's he doing now?" she asked Zack.

Ruffling his wet hair, Zack said, "A little better I think, but he's got a pretty bad wound on the back of his head. I wish I had something like a bandage. . ."

They both looked off into the distance in a contemplative manner. "Hey I've got it!" cried Lilleas. "My dress is pretty long, why don't we cut off a piece of it, and then we can tie it around his head."

Snapping his fingers Zack said, "I think that might work."

Lilleas kneeled down on the ground and spread her long pink dress out in a full circle. Zack pulled out his Buster sword and said in a bit of disbelief, "I guess there's a first time for everything." Then he looked up towards the sky and said apologetically, "Sorry for using your sword like this Angeal. This is for a really good purpose though. Trust me."

Even though he was a skilled swordsman, he'd never done something like this before. Using the sharp tip of his sword, he could only manage a haphazard circle around the edge of her dress. Then he made a cut down the middle of the circle he had just cut, turning it into a long linear piece of fabric with a five inch width. As he picked up the crooked piece of fabric, he put one hand behind his head and gave a sheepish smile.

Lilleas gave a pensive smile in response and said, "Oh well, it was an old dress anyway." She continued, "Would you mind if I tied it around his head?"

Zack trusted her with Cloud, so he shrugged his shoulders and said, "Sure, go ahead."

They both kneeled down by Cloud's head. Zack gently lifted up Cloud's head and his bangs, while Lilleas wrapped the makeshift pink fabric bandage around his head. There was enough fabric to go around twice. Then she tied it in a knot. She was about to tie it in a bow when Zack pulled her hand back and said in a serious tone, "I think he's had it hard enough. He doesn't need a pink bow on the top of his head right now."

After she had finished tying it off in a double knot, they both got a good look at Cloud with the pink bandage tied around his head. Zack put a hand over his mouth to stop the laughter, because as bad as he felt for his friend, it was quite a funny sight. As soon as Lilleas started giggling, he couldn't help himself, and he bust out in a roar of laughter. Through gasping breaths, Zack said, "I think pink's your color Spike." After they calmed down, Zack patted his friend on the head and apologized, "Sorry buddy, I couldn't help myself. I'll fix you up soon, and then we can take that pink thing off."

Turning to Lilleas, Zack said, "Listen, why don't you gather up the other kids and we'll head back."

Standing up, she stood frozen in her place and stammered like she was trying to say something, but she couldn't get the words out.

"What's up Lilleas?" Zack asked.

She remained in the same spot, but a rosy pink blush was slowly creeping into her cheeks. "Um, well, aren't you going to put some clothes on before heading back?"

He let out a big chuckle. Zack hadn't been around girls for a long time, so he'd forgotten how embarrassed they felt about nudity. Not that he was nude, he was in dark boxers, but it was probably something Lilleas wasn't accustomed to. "Oooohhhh, you mean why am I in my boxers?"

"Yeah," she nodded in response.

"Well if you haven't noticed, it's kind of cold, and these clothes are wet," he said holding up the dripping articles of clothing she had given him. He continued with a teasing wink, "I hope you don't mind."

In annoyance she crossed her arms and huffed, "Ugh, you're such a guy."

Zack just laughed. For once he wasn't quite sure of what to say. He was a guy, and no one had ever accused him of being anything different.

She didn't wait for Zack to finish laughing. "I'm going to go get the others," she said as she ran off.

Laying Cloud down on the wet towel he stood up and looked at his handiwork with satisfaction. "Much better, huh Spike?" After he gathered everything together, Zack squatted near Cloud and said with a big grin, "I bet you didn't know you had it in you. You're quite the stud Spike. If only you saw what everyone else sees in you."

Lilleas came back with three very cold boys. The color had drained from their faces, and their lips were purple. They were all jumping up and down in an effort to generate body heat, and their teeth were chattering. When they noticed Cloud, with the pink headband looking bandage, they started to snicker.

Now it was okay for Zack to laugh at Cloud, but that didn't mean he wanted anyone else making fun of his friend, so he cut them off. In a commanding voice he stated, "Alright you knuckleheads, I think you've had enough fun."

Zack's voice was rather authoritative, and he did have a big sword on his back, so they quickly stopped laughing.

Picking Cloud up, Zack said, "Alright it's time to head back."

**Author's Note:** I bet you didn't know that Zack had gymnastic abilities. Lol, well I don't think an aerial back tuck is too much for a first class SOLDIER. There was a little bit of a Crisis Core reference to Genesis in this chapter. I actually liked Genesis, but anyone who's played the game knows he gets a little sappy with the whole Loveless Poem. There's also another reference to Crisis Core with Angeal. In the game Angeal is EXTREMELY protective of his sword, so if he knew that Zack was using it to cut a skirt, or letting a little kid hold it, he would be quite upset. There's a quote from the game where Angeal rescues Zack and says, "You're a little more important than my sword. Well, just a little." Also, if you didn't know, sepsis is a major killer on the battlefield. It's also a big problem in hospitals too because of the development of 'superbugs', but I digress. I should note that I'm a Zerith at heart, but I'm also fond of the Cloti pairing ^_^ It was actually fanfiction that turned me onto the Cloti pairing. Zerith fanfiction tends to be depressing, but I still like them together as a couple. Both couples are so cute together. Is Zack still in character in this chapter? Any particular parts where he wasn't? I had to ask my husband's opinion on some of the situations because I'm a girl so I'm not sure how a guy would feel in some situations. I've always imagined Zack to be kind of a manly guy even though he looks quite feminine. Zack's such a pretty boy ^_^ Lol, well not quite as pretty as Cloud :P So what's Zack going to do with the children and that big gash on Cloud's head? That's the next chapter! Let me know what you think! It's okay, you can be honest. I realize we all have slightly different opinions. Reviews make me happy and inspire me to write ^_^

**Disclaimer:** Only Conlin, Xander, Giles, and Lilleas are mine. Everyone else is the property of Square Enix.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

The way back to camp wasn't as peaceful as Zack would have liked. After being submerged in the frigid water and exposed to the cold weather, the three preteen boys had slipped into a rather cantankerous mood.

"Oh man, you're so stupid, gold chocobos are definitely better than black ones," said one of the boys in a vexing tone. He was standing on the far right, and directed his comment towards his friend in the middle.

"No, my friend's uncle is a chocobo breeder and he told me that black chocobos are better!" the boy in the middle shot back quickly.

The third boy, standing on the far left, didn't really care about chocobos but he wanted to get in on the action, so he sneered, "You two are both stupid."

The two boys who were talking about chocobos suddenly turned on the boy who had called both of them stupid. The one standing on the far right sniped, "Oh yeah, well you're so stupid that you stared at an orange juice carton for an hour because it said 'concentrate.'"

The boy standing on the far left fired back, "You're so stupid that you called me to get my phone number."

"You're so stupid you thought asphalt was a rectal disorder," said the boy standing in the middle with a smug expression. He was especially proud of himself for that one because it sounded clever. He'd overheard it from his older brother. He didn't know what it meant, but he figured they wouldn't either.

"Oh yeah. . w. . well. . you're so. . so." the boy on the far left stammered, he couldn't think of a joke right away. That last joke from the boy in the middle had thrown him off guard.

As his mind desperately scrambled to find a stupid joke to fire back with, the boy on the far left took this golden opportunity to get ahead. "Well, you're so stupid you got run over by a parked chocobo."

The boy who stood in the middle snickered, and gave his friend on the far right a high five. "Nice one man!"

Zack had been able to tune out most of their conversation, but even he couldn't ignore their obnoxious 'you're so stupid' jokes. Zack was a fairly patient guy, but the sound of their insults grated on his ears and demanded his attention. The annoyance he felt reminded him of a situation he was in a long time ago when he was just a cadet. Two of his five roommates had different schedules so they woke up at different times. One of those two roommates would let his alarm clock ring forever because he didn't want to wake up. Unfortunately, that woke everyone else up. The sound of the infinite beeping alarm clock was different than the back-and-forth insults, but the feeling of inexplicable annoyance was the same. Turning around to face the arguing boys, his voice was strained with a mild hint of irritation. "Enough! We get it. You're ALL really stupid." After a few minutes of hushed silence, Zack had a change of heart and tried to lighten the mood by changing the subject. "Oh, for the record, gold chocobos are the best."

The boy on the far right pumped his arm in the air victoriously and screamed, "I knew it!" Then he turned to his friend and pompously poked his index finger at his friend's chest. He bragged, "I was right, and you were wrong."

The boy on the far left said in an accusing tone, directed at the middle boy, "Oooooo, you got told!"

Wearing a sullen expression, the boy in the middle said sarcastically, "Yeah, yeah, you know everything."

Unfortunately for Zack, this started another round of arguments about who was the smartest.

Zack shook his head, and said with a tired sigh, "Oh Gaia. . . Lilleas, are they always like this?"

"Pretty much," she said in a plain manner as though she'd been through this scenario many times before.

Looking down at Cloud, Zack said with a chuckle, "It's probably best you're not awake for this buddy."

By the time they made it back to camp the cold weather and damp clothes had gotten the better of the three boys, and they were quivering masses of jelly. Lilleas was the only one of the group that hadn't gotten wet, but she was still fairly cold. Zack had wet clothes draped over his shoulder, a wet friend in his arms, and only his boxers to shield him from the harsh weather. He also had on his SOLDIER belt, suspenders, shoulder pads, and Buster Sword, but that didn't help much in terms of insulating him from the cold. It wasn't an agreeable feeling, but it was only a mild discomfort compared to past afflictions like torture and human experimentation. Since it didn't bother him much, Zack didn't notice how cold it was until he saw the other four members of his group shivering. Their lips were tinged purple and arms laden with goosebumps, further evidence of their freezing condition. The corners of his mouth lifted into a soft smile as he said, "Hey, maybe we'll find something we can use to start a fire with. Would you guys like that?" He received four very eager head nods as a response. "Alright," he said with a slight laugh. "I'll see what I can do."

The three boys ran off to join the other kids while Lilleas stayed with Zack. He hadn't asked her to do that, but she felt it was implied. He turned to Lilleas, and focused his gaze on her to emphasize the importance of the favor he was about to ask. "Lilleas, do you think you could watch over Angeal for me? "

Her green eyes flickered with life, and she said in the most determined voice she could muster, "Yes. I'll take care of him." She was excited not only because she was going to get to spend more time with Cloud, but also due to the fact that Zack trusted her.

They walked over to a nearby tree and Zack propped Cloud up. His head, heavy with exhaustion, drooped slightly once Zack's hands left. His pale ivory eyelids, tinged a faint shade of rose, covered his expressive blue eyes in sleep. To an outside observer he appeared to be in a state of blissful slumber, but looks can often be deceiving. At that moment, Cloud was fighting desperately to resist the demons that were trying to pull him down into the dark abyss of eternal slumber. Zack would never fully understand the extensive battles that Cloud fought in the dark realm of the unconscious, but by his frequent screaming fits, Zack knew that something horrible was haunting Cloud in the recesses of his mind.

Zack turned to Lilleas, put a firm and steady hand on her shoulder, and said, "I'm counting on you. Tell me if anything happens, okay?"

In response she gave a firm nod. Zack watched as she kneeled beside Cloud, took his hand in hers, and tenderly stroked it with her thumb. Assured of his friend's safety, he took off to hang the wet clothes on a nearby tree. Then he decided to make his way over to the area of massacre to search for any valuables that may have been left behind.

On his way over to the dead bodies, he saw the group of children, they were sitting around talking. They perked up at the sight of Zack.

One of the girls ran over and cried, "Where have you been!?"

Her friend ran over to join her and added, "We were scared you might have left us or something."

It had been a long time since someone told him they cared where he was. Even though she was young, the girl who inquired about his whereabouts sounded like a worried mother. She used the same intonation that his mother used when asking the same question. Zack was a mischievous child so he'd heard that question from his mom many times; he knew exactly what it sounded like. It felt strange to miss something as simple as that about his mother. It'd been years since he'd seen or spoken to her. He hoped that she was alright and doing fine. Zack really wanted to see her, but Gongaga was a long way away. He would think about it another day because he had to help the children now. He redirected his thoughts to the girls in front of him.

With an appreciative laugh he said, "I wouldn't leave you girls out here by yourselves. We weren't gone for that long, were we?"

She grabbed his hand and looked up at him with eyes open wide, they were filled with concern. "I don't know, but it felt like forever."

The other girl grabbed his opposite hand, and together they pulled a cooperative Zack in the direction of the other kids.

In the presence of all of the children, it became obvious to Zack that many of them were staring at his boxers in disbelief. He pointed to his dark boxer shorts and said jokingly, "What, you guys don't like my new outfit?" He paused a moment for laughter, but nobody laughed. The children looked up at him with straight faces that demanded a better explanation. With some embarrassment at the fact that his joke fell flat, he scratched the back of his head and gave a sheepish smile. "Boy, you guys are a tough crowd." He continued without the abashment, "Anyway, I had to wash my clothes and they're cold and wet now. I'm going to put them on when they dry out."

Zack slapped his hands together to refocus the children. Once their attention was on him, he introduced himself proudly. He put his fists on his waist and playfully puffed out his chest as he said, "My name is Kunsel, but you will all refer to me as Lieutenant Kunsel."

A wave of laughs and giggles rolled through his audience.

"What does that make us Lieutenant Kunsel?" asked one of the girls.

"You all have the most important job of all. You're my cadets!" he said feigning excitement. Being a cadet just meant that you were in training, but he didn't want to let them know that cadets were at the bottom of the military ranking system.

Unlike the other kids, Conlin wasn't easily fooled. With distrust in his voice he quipped, "Hey, wait a minute. Isn't cadet a training position?"

Zack could have taken the factual route and told them the straight definition of a cadet, but from experience he knew that the inspirational route was more effective. In his effort to motivate the group Zack replied, "Yes, but as cadets, you are the heart of the team! If there were no cadets, there would be no Generals, Lieutenants, or anyone else because everyone starts out as a cadet. You are the future." To further sell his idea he added, "I was even a cadet once."

This inspired a set of ooo's and ah's from the boys in the audience, except for Conlin. He was still hesitant about Zack's explanation. Some of the children came from rural towns where Shinra rarely visited, so they didn't know much about the SOLDIER program. However, all of them knew that Zack was strong, had big muscles, and the biggest sword they'd ever seen in their lives. That made Zack really cool.

"Really?" asked a boy, eyes wide with admiration.

"Yep," Zack replied. "So I want each one of you to take your job as a cadet seriously. We're a team right now. Okay, now I want all of you to introduce yourselves." Being a people person, Zack had a penchant for remembering names. He made it a game for himself to see if he could remember all of their names by the end of the night. After the introductions were complete, he went on to explain the plan for the day. "Okay, I'm going to search the dead bodies to see if there are any valuables left behind. Then I'm going to need some of the guys to help me get rid of the dead bodies. I have. . . "

He was interrupted by one of the girls. In annoyance she interjected, "Hey! Lieutenant Kunsel, why can't the girls help you get rid of the bodies?"

Zack crossed his arms over his chest and raised an eyebrow at her. "Seriously?"

She answered him with tight lips pulled over clenched teeth.

Slightly flustered he stammered, "Uh, s-s-s-sure, anyone can help if they want. Sorry about that. I just assumed that a girl wouldn't want to pick up a dead body, but I guess I was wrong."

This time she answered him back with a smug smile.

"Okay, moving on. " Expecting no one to answer, Zack still asked the inevitable question, "Does anyone else have something to share?"

"Yeah, over here," Conlin said in a loud attention-seeking voice. Pulling out a hefty looking wallet he said proudly, "I already picked their pockets." He started to pull a few other things out of his pocket including, a pocket knife, matches, cigarettes, and a pocket watch. Shaking the closed wallet in the air he said, "Man, those guys were loaded."

Zack held out his hand expecting Conlin to come forward and hand it over.

"Fuck you man. I found it, so it's mine," Conlin snarled in contempt.

The children all turned their attention to Zack and waited in anticipation for his next move. Zack was used to working under pressure, and being stared at by several children didn't faze him.

Rolling his eyes Zack sighed, "Well Cadet Conlin, we can do this 'the easy way,' or 'the hard way.'" Narrowing his gaze at Conlin, he said, "Your choice."

Conlin figured out what 'the easy way' meant, but being the curious and arrogant preteen boy he was, he asked, "What's the hard way?"

"Do you really want to find out?" Zack snorted. He wasn't really going to hurt the boy, just cause him some mild discomfort, but he'd prefer not to.

Zack's glowing blue eyes fixed on Conlin's brown eyes as they engaged in a silent battle of willpower, blue eyes commanding, brown eyes sneering. It wasn't long before Conlin broke under Zack's pressure, and he shuffled up and slammed the wallet into Zack's hand.

Putting the wallet away in his pocket Zack said, "Alright, we'll split this up later after dinner." Zack ignored the multitude of groans from the children. "Okay, so back to the plan. After disposing of the dead bodies, we're going to check the truck out. I have the keys with me so we can open up that locked box in the back of the truck enclosure."

"So, that dead body. Who's with me?" Zack questioned as he surveyed the children. All of the boys stepped forward. Furrowing his eyebrows in confusion, he tried to find the girl who volunteered to help dispose of the dead bodies earlier. He spotted a girl shrinking into the background. "There you are," Zack confirmed. Noting her apprehensive expression he asked, "Wait, aren't you the girl that wanted to help us get rid of the bodies?"

She averted his gaze, her voice heavy with guilt as she said, "Well, I didn't want to actually help. I just wanted to know that I could."

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "You kids are going to be the end of me." Just then, Zack realized his mentor Angeal did the same thing to him years ago when he had frustrated him. He let out a little chuckle at the realization and said, "Oh Gaia, look what you kids are turning me into."

Turning to the group of boys Zack commanded, "Alright, so the first thing we need to do is find a big depression in the ground."

"You mean like a hole?" one of the boys asked.

"I don't think we're going to find that deep of a hole just lying around. I'm thinking of something more like a ditch. You know, something to hide two bodies in. Then we'll cover it up with a few layers of loose dirt and tree branches." Zack pulled out the wallet, and quickly counted the money. Pulling out 1000 gil he said, "I'll give this to whoever can find the best and biggest ground depression. Now remember, we need to hide two bodies in it so it has to be really big," he said stretching his arms out as wide as possible.

No sooner had he spoken that the boys took off running like it was a treasure hunt. The girls noticed this exchange and became somewhat upset. Instead of seeing Zack's monetary incentive as a reward for the boys, they saw the lack of it as punishment for themselves.

"Hey! Why can't we do it?!" huffed one of the girls.

Shrugging his shoulders, Zack turned to them and said, "Well I guess this step doesn't involve the actual bodies so why don't you join them. There are four of you, so I want you girls in pairs." He added with an innocent wink, "I can't have my girls getting hurt now." This brought out a round of giggles from the girls. Clapping his hands above his head he said in playful military fashion, "Let's hustle now! Move out!" With Zack's command the girls paired up and ran after the boys. They'd have to make up for lost time, but they were in pairs, so from their viewpoint it seemed like a fair deal.

Zack figured it would probably take them a few minutes until someone found a big enough hollow in the ground to call his attention, so he'd use the free time to check up on Cloud. On approaching Lilleas he saw that she looked distressed. He was afraid to ask, but he knew he had to. The words stuck in his throat as he choked out, "Is something wrong?"

She shifted her eyes from Zack to Cloud as she said softly, "I think he might have a fever or something. He feels a little warm."

Zack looked down at Cloud who looked slightly flushed and appeared to be awake. Soft blue eyes looked distant under a veil of thick lashes. Zack crouched down near his friend and put the back of his own forearm against Cloud's forehead. He drew his arm back and said tentatively, "Hmmm, he does feel warm." He then took Cloud's wrist and tried to find a pulse. The only problem was that he needed a watch. Conlin had a pocket watch, but he was off somewhere on the search, and it would take too long to find him. For now, one of them would just have to manually count seconds while the other person took Cloud's pulse. "Hey Lilleas, do you know how to count in seconds?"

With a nod of the head she said, "I think so."

"Okay, when I say start, count to fifteen seconds, and do it silently." Using two of his fingers to find Cloud's pulse, he directed her to start with his other hand and said, "Go."

After fifteen seconds she said, "Alright, time's up."

Rolling his eyes up in concentration, he did some quick multiplication to get a pulse rate. "He's got a pulse of 60 bpm, beats per minute, which is normal. Our method wasn't very accurate though, so it could be in the range of 50-70 bpm. That's still normal though."

Turning to look at Lilleas his tone changed to one of concern. "For now things look okay, but let's hope it's not sepsis." Zack was hoping Cloud was experiencing Mako withdrawal instead of sepsis. Cloud occasionally had bouts of Mako withdrawal, which were almost always accompanied by a fever. Sepsis was accompanied by a fever, but also came with tachycardia, a fast heart beat over 90 beats per minute.

Reaching out a hand, he grabbed a mass of blonde spikes and shook his friend's head. "You doin' okay buddy?" Seeing Cloud's vacant response he continued, "How about we put you in the truck. It will probably be warmer and more comfortable." He reached down to grab Cloud, but he put a little too much strength into his lift and ended up tossing him in the air slightly. When Cloud landed into his arms Zack grunted, "Easy there Spike. Don't get crazy on me."

Zack walked briskly over to the truck with Lilleas trailing behind him. The truck door was already open from earlier, so Zack stepped up onto the ledge and into the truck. As evidence of its old age, the gray fabric of the seats was nappy and discolored. The smell of smoke was meshed into the fabric of the seats, making the interior smell like a big ashtray. However, it was much warmer and softer than the cold ground so Zack figured it was still better for Cloud to rest in the truck. Laying his friend down across the length of the seat, he stepped out of the truck and motioned for Lilleas to enter. "You're going to have to put his head on your lap because there's not enough room for you otherwise." Before leaving he said in a serious tone, "If his fever gets worse you come get me, okay?"

She turned her head away in embarrassment because a pink glow was starting to form on her cheeks, but she managed to croak, "Okay." Lilleas had never been that close to Cloud before.

Looking at Cloud, Zack forced a weak smile and said, "It's going to be okay buddy. Lilleas is going to take good care of you."

Shutting the door, he walked away from the truck to wait for the children. It wasn't long before Conlin and a pair of girls ran up to him, panting and breathless, and asked him to inspect their findings. Their enthusiasm about such a morbid game made him chuckle a little. He was asking these children to find a deep depression in the ground to bury the dead bodies in. Instead of being horrified at the grisly nature of the situation, they went about the task with the enthusiasm of young children playing a game of hide-and-go-seek. "Well, we have to wait for everyone to come back before I start inspection so that I can compare," explained Zack.

"Awww man, so you mean we didn't have to run here?" Conlin asked still trying to catch his breath.

"I guess not," Zack said shrugging his shoulders. Giving the boy's shoulder a lighthearted punch he said, "Think of it this way, you get to spend some extra time with me."

"Yeah, lucky me," Conlin smirked.

Pointing his finger at Conlin, he said playfully, "Hey pal, don't forget, I'm not afraid to kick your ass."

"Oh yeah, bring it old man," taunted Conlin.

Zack struggled to restrain himself from laughing at the foolish kid. He thought to himself, who does this boy think he is? Bring it? Old man!? Zack couldn't let Conlin get away with that, even if the kid was just full of hot air, so he gave him a slightly harder punch to the shoulder than before. Nothing too hard, but it ended up knocking Conlin on the ground. Zack walked over to help him up. Bending over, he reached out a hand as he said, "I think you forgot cadet, its Lieutenant Kunsel."

The flicker of distrust in Conlin's eyes faded as he looked up at Zack. Instead of a scowl, Zack was offering him an apologetic smile. Conlin took his hand and Zack pulled him up effortlessly. Conlin said with an imperceptible smile of his own, "I guess I owe you a 'thank you' for helping me up Lieutenant Kunsel."

Zack threw his arm around Conlin's shoulder. Maybe Conlin wasn't such a bad kid after all, Zack thought. With a half smile he turned to Conlin and said, "Hey, don't mention it."

It was about another half hour before all of the other kids returned. A few gave up having found nothing, while others claimed to have found the biggest ground depression. On their way to inspection, one of the kids forgot how to return to the special spot he found, but all of the other kids remembered. It was a pair of girls that won the contest. Zack had a soft spot in his heart for girls, so instead of splitting the prize money, he gave each of them the full reward. Of course, he did it secretly and made them promise not to be spoilsports and flaunt their prize money to the other children.

Afterwards, the children started talking loudly amongst themselves. "Yo!" he cried to get their attention. "Okay, Conlin give me the matches," he said walking over to him. An hour ago Conlin would have slapped the matches into Zack's outstretched palm, but he was feeling less bitter towards Zack after their bonding moment. Instead, he placed the matches into Zack's palm casually, like he was setting a book down on a table.

Making his return to the front of the crowd, he held up the matches and announced, "We're going to make a fire tonight."

Having been abducted during the winter and stored in a cold metal truck enclosure, it had been a long time since many of the children felt warm. All of the kids jumped up and down with joy at the news. The three boys with the wet clothes were the most excited of the bunch.

Pointing to the right of the crowd, Zack used his mock military voice and said, "I want the boys in a group over there." Pointing in the other direction he directed the girls to get into another group. "Alright cadets, do you want to hear what your jobs are?"

They all nodded their heads with enthusiasm. In any other situation, the children wouldn't have looked forward to anything with the word 'job' in it. However, Zack was able to effectively convince them that the whole thing was more like a game. His enthusiasm rubbed off on the children, and they found themselves playing along with Zack in their mock military assignments.

"The boys are going to help me dispose of the dead bodies, while the girls are going to find firewood for the fire tonight. Do you girls know what you're looking for?"

"Twigs and branches?" asked an uncertain female voice.

"That's part of it, but we also need some grass, leaves, and pine needles. It has to be dry. Wet stuff won't make a good fire," Zack replied.

In a commanding voice he ordered, "Okay cadets, let's get moving."

With that command the girls took off to find firewood, and the boys stayed where they were, waiting for Zack. Just then Lilleas came running over. The boys saw Zack's confident expression shift into one of worry as Lilleas approached him.

She spit the words out without pause, "Kunsel, I think Angeal's fever has gotten worse."

"Hey Conlin can I borrow that pocket watch?" Zack asked. The sharp edge in his voice lent a sense of urgency to his request.

"Ah man, that too?" Colin asked with a bit of annoyance.

With the concern evident in his voice, Zack said, "Don't worry, I'll give it back. Hurry up kid, this is important."

Conlin handed it over, and Zack said to the group of boys, "Stay here, I'll be right back."

Lilleas fell behind as Zack took off running towards the truck. He was already inside the truck and taking Cloud's temperature by the time she had reached the truck.

Putting the back of his forearm on Cloud's head, Zack asked, "Hey, how ya feelin' buddy?"

"Ngggggghhhh," moaned Cloud.

Patting his cheek, Zack said tenderly, "Yeah, you feel pretty warm. I'm going to take your pulse now."

By this time, Lilleas had made it to the truck where she found Zack taking Cloud's pulse.

Using the watch he got a more accurate estimate of his pulse. Turning to Lilleas he said, "Well, it's about 80 beats per minute now. That's kind of high for him. Let's hope it's raised because of the pain." He continued, "Okay Lilleas, you take my place and I'll be right back."

He rushed off before she could spit out, "Where are you going?"

The boys watched Zack as he zipped past them and wondered what he was going to do with the wet shirt. He had already told them that he wasn't going to wear it until it was dry. They reasoned that he must have something else in mind. With wet shirt in hand, Zack was already at the truck before anyone could come up with a plausible answer.

Zack stepped up on the ledge of the truck and handed Lilleas the wet shirt. "Here, fold this up and put it on his forehead. It's fairly cold so hopefully it will take his fever down." He stayed while Lilleas put the wet shirt on Cloud's forehead because he wanted to make certain his friend was taken care of. Still on the ledge, Zack softly spoke to Cloud in a reassuring voice, "It's going to be okay Spike." Zack reached out to stroke Cloud's mess of spikes, his fingers running through the soft silken strands of golden hair.

Cloud murmured softly into the stale air of the truck, "Mmmmnnnnngggg." The childlike nature of the sound reached out to Zack and compelled him to smile affectionately at his dear friend.

The truck was in viewing range of the boys so they saw the whole scene. They figured out that the wet shirt was for Zack's sick friend, but that only increased the mystery of the situation. Who was the young spiky-haired blonde man, and what was wrong with him? With Zack's return, an awkward silence filled the area like a fog. Its nubilous existence cast a shadow of shame over the children, and smothered their desire for curious questions. Zack didn't particularly want to volunteer information about Cloud either, so their unasked questions lingered in the air.

Breaking through the silence, Zack tried to hide his anxiety about Cloud as he spoke. "So let's go dispose of the bodies. If you don't mind, keep the names a secret. I'd prefer not to know." Without a name it was easier for Zack to disassociate himself from the fact that the remains were once a living human. A name meant that someone had once cared about the bastard long enough to give him an identity. Zack didn't want to think about the fact that there might be someone out there that cared for the person he slaughtered. He continued, "Which one do you guys want to get rid of first, the bald one, or the one with hair?"

The children didn't see Xander's death close up, so they had less emotional attachment to the remains. In unison they replied in a cool tone, "The bald one."

As they made their way over to Xander's remains, a problem with disposal became apparent. Xander was in two grisly pieces, a bald head, and a headless body. The head had nothing to grab onto, it was just a bald head with purple lips twisted in a grimace, locked in place by rigor mortis. After thinking for a minute, Zack came up with a solution. "Alright, let's pull his shirt off and use that to wrap around the head and carry it." Nobody stepped forward so Zack just did the task himself. It was easier than fighting with the group of boys. Zack also knew that they had probably never disposed of a dead body, so he was trying to be somewhat sensitive to their feelings. Picking the wrapped head up, Zack asked, "Who wants to carry it?" Once again, nobody volunteered so Zack thrust the gruesome package towards Conlin, whose hesitant hands reluctantly took the head. Zack saw that Conlin felt insulted by the gesture so he got up close to him and whispered, "Hey, you know why I gave you the head right?"

Conlin searched for the answer in Zack's eyes, but he didn't find it so he stayed silent, waiting patiently for the answer.

Zack continued, "It's because you're the only one brave enough to do it." Then he put his hand on Conlin's shoulder and gave him a gentle shake as he flashed him a confident smile.

Zack could have disposed of Xander's headless body by himself because he was certainly strong enough. However, he felt that disposing of the actual body would help provide closure to this horrible chapter in their life story. There were four boys left so Zack ordered each of them to grab a hand or a foot. Zack walked around to the middle of the body where he was planning to lift it.

"Ewww, he's really cold and stiff," complained one of the boys. He was staring down with revulsion at the stiff pale hand he clutched in his own hands.

"That's what happens when you die," sighed Zack.

"Yeah, and then you rot and become bug food!"exclaimed another boy, relishing in the disgust his statement caused.

Rolling his eyes at the boy, Zack said in an authoritative tone, "Enough talk, let's do this."

Since he planned on doing the only actual lifting, Zack wrapped his arms tightly around the middle of the body. "Okay cadets, on the count of three we're going to lift. One. . .Two. . "

Before he could get to three one of the boys had already lifted. All heads turned towards the offending boy.

Zack calmly repeated his instructions. "Two is not the same as three. You have to wait until three to lift, okay?"

The boy nodded in response and apologized, "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it," reassured Zack. "Let's just do it right the second time."

On their second attempt, they all lifted together on the count of three. As they made their way over to the big ditch everyone was silent, using their full concentration to push away unpleasant thoughts about death and decomposition.

The disposal of the second body was more efficient because the children knew what to expect. Even though it was more efficient it took longer to dispose of. They had to make more than one trip because Giles body was in two equal pieces, and Zack could only help one group of kids at a time. After throwing both parts of the second body in the ditch, Zack turned to the boys and proudly said, "Good work guys." He then preceded to high five each one of them.

When they returned to the campsite, they found the girls sitting down by a large pile of leaves, pine needles, twigs, and large branches. "Alright girls!" he cheered. As Zack started to clap the boys followed suit until the air was filled with applause.

Gathering everyone together again, Zack asked them to go pick up their shackles. The children were a bit surprised and confused by this command, but they trusted Zack so they did as they were told. After they returned to him, Zack announced, "We're going to go bury them with the bodies. This is the start of a new life."

Zack led the way, leading a chain of children, a sturdy chain with each link interconnected by their shared past. When they got to the ditch, Zack ordered them to throw away their chains. The melody of steel hitting the ground rang out as the chains were disposed of. It was the end of an old life, and the beginning of a new one. A new life meant change, and even when change is for the better it can still be scary and uncertain. So the children stood over the ditch with their heads bowed in a morose fashion. Zack still hadn't told the children what tomorrow would bring for them.

Sensing their worry, Zack turned to the somber group and said in a reassuring voice, "Don't worry. We'll talk about the plan for tomorrow morning over the fire."

He continued, "Now, we need to throw a bunch of dirt, twigs, and leaves on top to cover it up." Zack bent over, grabbed a large clump of dirt, and hurled it at the grave. The children quickly followed suit throwing whatever nearby brush or dirt they could find onto the grave. It was a cathartic exercise, each clump of plant debris thrown relieved some of their pent up anger. They went about the task with wild abandon, seeking the thrill of emotional release. Those two men were gone and could never hurt them again. It was an exhilarating feeling, but it was something more, something that the children couldn't place or understand. They glanced around at each other and found that same glimmer of emotion mirrored in their neighbors. It had been a collective experience shared by all. Wherever they went in life after this, they would be forever bound to each other in this moment of time. After the task had been completed, they stood back in admiration of their handiwork.

Zack's voice lowered and became serene, as though he was thinking about a loved one that passed away a long time ago. "If you learn anything from this short time you have with me, I want you to learn this. It's better to die on your feet than live on your knees."

One of the girls standing next to Zack grabbed his hand and looked up at him with inquisitive hazel eyes. In an innocent voice she asked, "What does that mean?"

Looking out into the distance he responded, "It means that it's better to die a free man than to spend the rest of your life in the hands of another."

His statement echoed within the small group, each of them pondering the implications of it. They joined Zack in looking out into the distance, as if the answer existed somewhere out there in the vast expanse of Gaia.

After a few minutes of peaceful introspection Zack said with strength, "C'mon cadets, lets head back before it gets dark."

The children nodded in response. Hand in hand with the girl beside him, Zack led the way with the rest of the children following after.

**Author's Note:** So I thought this chapter was going to move the story along a little bit more than this. It takes a lot of words to describe a situation ^_^' This chapter could have gone several ways, but I decided to make Zack playful with the children. I got the idea for Zack to play mock military assignments with the children because of his interaction with Yuffie (she's 9 years old in Crisis Core). She's in the main story line and some optional missions. She tries to kill him, but being a child she's not very effective. He always plays along with her and pretends that she mortally wounded him. It's pretty cute. I'll admit, this chapter was hard because of all the dialogue. I've had very little practice with dialogue since all of my writing prior to this has been essays. My mom helped me a lot with the concepts for this chapter and kept me on track. Sorry there wasn't much Cloud in this chapter, but there will be in the next. The fate of the children will also be revealed. I thought I was going to get to that in this chapter, but it didn't happen. Oh, I almost forgot, **Lucifer** and all of her chocobo talk inspired the first part ^_^

**Disclaimer:** Lilleas, Conlin, Xander, and Giles are mine. Everyone else is the property of Square Enix.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

The sun fell on bloody knees, taking her last few breaths of the day as she sank behind the mountainous hills. Pearly white clouds lingered in the amber colored sky, holding onto the last vestiges of the day's innocence before being overtaken by the darkness of night.

Through the square window of the truck, Lilleas could see the beautiful scenery. She gazed out the window captivated by the orange glow of the falling sun. After a few minutes, she was able to tear herself away and look down at the young man on her lap. "Hey Angeal, you have to see this!" she said in soft excitement, she didn't want to spook Cloud with a loud voice. Taking the wet shirt off of his forehead, she put her hands behind his back and started to push him upwards. With a small giggle she said, "Kunsel wasn't joking, you are pretty heavy." Once she'd lifted him up to a forty-five degree angle, she was able to get behind him and use the force of her body to help push him up. Finally she'd gotten him to a sitting position where he could look out at the window. From behind, she placed her chin on his shoulder and asked with amazement, "Isn't it beautiful?"

She craned her neck around to see his reaction. At first, his half-lidded eyes reflexively closed because the bright light was too much to accommodate all at once, but then the warm glow slowly coaxed his eyes open. The sight of the sunset was like a match being struck, and it burned him deep within. The vivid sensation reached out and pulled him back into the realm of reality. His eyes flickered with passion and burned a bright blue, he felt alive again. He tried to move his arm, but it felt as though there was a strong resistance opposing him. The air felt thick and heavy, pushing his arm down like a strong current of water as he tried to lift it. Lilleas noticed Cloud's left arm slowly moving upwards. She gasped, "What is it Angeal?"

His arm just kept lifting in response. She wasn't sure what he wanted, but it seemed like he wanted to lift his arm. She shifted her weight so that she could help him. His fingers started to reach out, and that's when she realized he wanted to touch the falling sun. She moved over to grab his hand, and quickly unrolled the window. The light filled the truck, and the orange glow fluoresced even brighter. Then she bent his knees so that he could scoot up closer to the window. Guiding his hand towards the open window she cheered him on, "That's it, you're almost there!"

As his fingers made it out into the fresh air, he made a final push with his arm in the direction of the sun. He desperately spread out his fingers until he saw that he was touching the sun. Even though it was actually millions of miles away, from Cloud's viewpoint it looked like his fingers were making contact with the glowing orange orb. He closed his eyes, and a smile of satisfaction spread over his placid face. Having achieved his goal, the strength left his muscles, and he went limp. Lilleas rushed to catch him, and managed to grab hold of his arm before he fell. She gently lowered him until he was lying down on the seat. Then she moved back to her previous position and rested his head gently on her lap. She brushed his bangs back as she put the wet shirt back onto his forehead.

She looked down and noticed the smile hadn't left his face. She said tenderly, "You really liked that, huh?"

His voice came out in a forced whisper, "Sun. . . so warm." Lilleas was smiling down at him, waiting to see if any other words would escape from his lips. He continued in a much warmer and fuller tone, "It feels good."

Lilleas knew that Cloud was still in a great deal of pain. It was heart wrenching for her to watch him battle through his agony for a fleeting moment of happiness. With moist sapphire eyes, she managed to choke out, "Yes, the sun is very warm. It feels nice."

As she stroked his cheek, he moved his face towards her gentle caress and nuzzled her hand.

"You're so pretty when you smile." She bit her bottom lip trying to disguise the bittersweet tone in her voice. "You should smile more often Angeal."

Now in a trance, his thoughts came in fragments. That voice, Cloud thought to himself. . . it's so soft and soothing. Her pretty brown hair. . . smells like earth. . . green twinkling eyes. . . she's warm. . .skin soft as silk. . . she makes me feel. . . warm. . . happy. . . something more. . . tingly? Different. . . not same as other girl. . . girl with dark hair. . . dark like Zack's. . . warm brown eyes. . . voice sweet like honey. . . promise. . . makes me feel warm. . . more like fire. . . burning. . . I still remember. . . Tifa.

~*~*~*~*~*

_The date, May 3, was engraved on his heart, it was Tifa's birthday. Cloud hadn't done anything last year, not because he'd forgotten, but because he was too shy. This year was different because he finally summoned up the courage to get her something for her birthday. He wanted to get her something thoughtful, but nothing too audacious. It might be best to get her something safe, like a birthday card, he thought. It was best to test the temperature of the water before jumping in, or at least that's what his mother used to say. Although his mother wasn't referring to girls when she said it, Cloud felt it was still applicable for his situation with Tifa. As much as he liked her, he couldn't bring himself to admit his feelings to her. Maybe this year would be the year. He'd have to play it by ear though and see how she responded to the card. It was two weeks before her fifteenth birthday, so he figured it would get to her in time if he went out to get the card today._

_When classes were over, he came back to the room to find one of his roommates relaxing and watching TV._

"_Hey Dustin, you want to come to the general store with me?" Cloud asked as he started to change out of his uniform._

_With eyes still fixed on the TV he said, "Ummm, yeah sure. Hey, have you had dinner yet?"_

_Cloud hadn't really thought about dinner because he'd been kind of nervous about getting the card. He hadn't really thought about lunch either for that same reason, but now that his roommate mentioned it, he was rather hungry. "No, but why don't we go to the mess hall afterwards."_

"_Alright, now you're talkin'!" his roommate said with enthusiasm. "Here, let me just get my keys and wallet, and then we can go."_

_As they left, Cloud let out a sigh of relief, he was finally doing this. Dustin noticed Cloud's sigh and asked, "Hey man, you okay?"_

_Startled out of his thoughts Cloud replied, "Oh, uh, y-yeah. I'm fine."_

_Dustin lifted an eyebrow in response, and Cloud reassured him, "Don't worry, I'm fine."_

_After that awkward exchange they were quiet for a while until Dustin broke the silence. "So, why are we going to the general store?"_

_Scratching the back of his head, Cloud looked down at the ground and said, "I'm getting a birthday card for a friend."_

_Dustin said teasingly, "This wouldn't happen to be for a GIRL, would it?"_

_Cloud could feel the pink creeping up in his cheeks. He suddenly became very aware of his hands so he shoved them into his pocket. Feeling bashful he said softly, "Uh, yeah."_

"_Is it that Tifa girl?" Dustin asked._

_Damn it, Cloud thought to himself. He had sort of wanted to keep the whole thing a secret. Dustin had a big mouth so now everyone was going to know. Well, it wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but Cloud was sort of a private person. He tried to play it off like it was no big deal so he answered in a calm voice, "Yeah."_

"_Oh, man that chick is so hot! Don't EVEN get me started on her rack!" Dustin said excitedly. He'd seen a picture of her before. As something to remember her by, Tifa gave Cloud a picture of herself before he left Nibelheim for Midgar. One day, Cloud was gazing dreamily at the picture of her, unaware that one of his roommates was right behind him. His roommate snatched the picture out of his hands, and before Cloud knew it, all of his roommates had seen the picture of the pretty girl from Nibelheim. Dustin stared off into space thinking about her voluptuous body. _

_Cloud noticed his friend was suddenly silent, which was very uncharacteristic for Dustin. He was disgusted when he looked over and saw Dustin's eyes glazed over with lust. Cloud really didn't like other guys thinking about Tifa that way. Well, he certainly thought about her in that manner, but that didn't make it okay for other guys to ogle her body, either real or imagined. Unlike the other guys, Cloud really cared about Tifa, or at least that's how he justified his fantasies about her. He ribbed his friend sharply in the side with his elbow to break him out of his lust-filled trance._

"_Ow!" Dustin clutched his side where he'd just been speared by Cloud's elbow. "Hey man, it's not like she's your girlfriend, right?"_

_Cloud's expression became sullen as he realized Dustin had a point. Guy code didn't allow one to fantasize about a buddy's girlfriend openly, but Tifa wasn't his girlfriend, at least not yet. He admitted his mistake, "Sorry."_

"_It's okay," Dustin said with a sigh. "So, I guess you really like her, huh?"_

_Looking at him with a stupefied expression he said, "Is it really that obvious?"_

_Lifting up his shirt, Dustin pointed to the bruise that had started to form on his side. "Dude?! Look!"_

_Cloud let out a snicker, "I got you pretty good, huh?"_

"_Yeah, but I'll get you back," Dustin said as he gave Cloud a good—natured punch. _

_Once they arrived at the store, Dustin informed Cloud that he was going to go get some snacks._

"_Alright, yeah, just meet me over in the card section," Cloud responded._

_With a wave Dustin said, "Cool," and then walked over to the snack section._

_Cloud made his way over to the card section. As he quickly glanced down the aisle, he let out a sigh of relief because he noticed that there was no one he knew in sight. Walking down the aisle, he quickly scanned the various categories until he found the "Birthday" section. Well this wasn't going to be so hard, he thought. That was until he noticed that the "Birthday" section was further divided into many subcategories including, "Sweetheart"," Friend", "Brother", "Sister"," For Her", "Wife", and "Birthday." He let out a groan at the realization this was going to be more difficult than he initially thought._

_He figured he'd start at the "Friend" section and see if there were any good birthday cards there. He wanted a sentimental card, but nothing too mushy. Maybe a funny card would work, but did Tifa like funny things? Furthermore, did girls in general like funny things? He never had a sister or much experience with girls, so his knowledge on the subject was slim. He had a mother, but she didn't really count because she was pleased with anything that Cloud gave her. This included a very misshapen and lopsided clay snowman ornament he made when he was six. He had a feeling that girls liked sentimental stuff, so he'd try to go at it from that angle. After thoroughly looking through a few cards, Dustin came walking down the aisle with a hand-basket full of snacks._

"_Did you find a card yet?" Dustin asked._

"_Hmmm, not yet," Cloud said with a small head shake._

_Picking up a card from the "Sweetheart" section Dustin asked, "Hey, how about this one?"_

_Cloud glanced over and carefully read the words on the card out loud. "Let's get naked." Cloud threw Dustin a dirty look and said, "You're an idiot."_

_Dustin let out a hearty laugh and said, "I know, right?"_

_Cloud went back to his birthday card search while Dustin kept himself amused with the dirty humor cards. _

_Just then, a voice came out of nowhere, booming through the silence, "Hey Strife, what are you doing in my store?"_

_Cloud's heart sunk in his chest. He would recognize that voice anywhere. That voice belonged to Aden. At least Dustin's here, Cloud thought. That thought was only a temporary comfort because he noticed that Aden was accompanied by two friends. That meant he was outnumbered again! Cloud stood frozen in place as he tried to come up with something to dissuade further conflict._

"_He's looking for a card for his girlfriend," Dustin said proudly in his defense of Cloud._

_Cloud's jaw dropped open in horror and surprise. His mind scrambled to piece together the past few seconds. Did Dustin just say what he thought he said? What made him think that was actually the right thing to say?! He turned to glower at Dustin._

_Aden got in Cloud's face and said in a mocking voice, "What's that Strife, a girlfriend?!"_

_With clenched teeth, Cloud curled up his fists in anticipation for what Dustin might say next. _

_Dustin could feel the animosity radiating off of Cloud, thick and heavy. He decided to twist the knife that he had already plunged in. Getting even closer to Cloud, the words came out sharp and caustic as he snarled, "I didn't think FAGGOTS had girlfriends." Then he turned around to his snickering friends and they congratulated Aden with high fives. _

_Ablaze with anger, Cloud could feel his body trembling. All logic flew out the window as Cloud let his animal instincts take over. Cocking back his fist, he stood poised, waiting for Aden to turn around. He waited, waited, waited, until. . . BAM! Aden flew back as Cloud's fist connected with his face._

_Aden fell on the floor, legs and arms in disarray as struggled to sit up. With disgust, Aden noticed blood dripping from his nose. Both of his friends bent over to help pull him up. That's when Cloud quickly considered his options. He could either fight or run. He and Dustin were both fast runners so they could probably outrun them. Unfortunately, they were outnumbered two to three so they probably wouldn't win in a fight. The decision seemed pretty clear to Cloud. "Come on!" Cloud cried as he frantically grabbed Dustin and ran towards the exit._

"_Get back here you lil' shit!" Aden growled. He and his friends took chase after Cloud and Dustin._

_Cloud's feet flew across the slick floor, and he didn't dare look back. Almost at the exit, he noticed a figure just entering through the door. He tried to stop, but it was too late. His rubber sneakers made a screeching noise as they desperately clung to the slippery linoleum floor. Once his feet stopped moving, the forward momentum kept carrying the rest of his body forward, and he crashed into the stranger right in front of him_

"_Oooof," grunted the other person as they both fell to the ground._

_Cloud was dazed for a second, but then quickly regained his bearings. Much to his embarrassment, he realized that he was spread out on top of the stranger. The first thing he noticed was a familiar scent of laundry detergent and cologne, but it wasn't just any cologne. He had definitely smelled that fragrance before, clean and refreshing, with a hint of musk and lilies. There was only one man that could pull that off. Pushing himself up off the stranger, he confirmed his suspicion. Oh Gaia! It was Zack! _

_Zack noticed Cloud staring down at him with eyes large as saucers. With a chuckle Zack said, "You know, you could have just dropped by my place if you wanted to see me that bad."_

_Cloud quickly scrambled to his feet, and then offered a hand to help Zack up. "Hey thanks buddy," Zack said as Cloud pulled him up. _

_That's when Zack noticed Aden and his three friends. The trio looked pissed, and Aden look like he'd suffered quite a hit to the face. Aden fixed a grimace on his face and pointed a finger as he yelled accusingly, "Strife hit me!"_

_Zack turned to face Cloud, put a hand on his shoulder, and said seriously, "Is that true Cloud?"_

_Cloud averted Zack's gaze as he mumbled, "Yeah." He could feel Aden smirking behind him._

"_You're lucky this happened while I was off-duty or I'd have to report you," Zack said sternly. He felt it necessary to remind Cloud of the potential consequences of his hasty action. All SOLDIER officers, while on duty, were required to report any acts of physical violence among the cadets. Disobedience from the rules was punished with a demotion. While off-duty, SOLDIER officers were just highly encouraged to report acts of violence. _

_Cloud kept his eyes fixed on the ground out of shame. He didn't want to look into Zack's eyes and see disappointment, or even worse, pity. _

"_You want to tell me what happened?" Zack asked in a concerned voice. He knew that Cloud wasn't the type to instigate a fight, unless he had good cause or was provoked. He offered his friend a comforting smile, but it was of no use. Cloud had passed the point of reasoning long ago._

_The whole thing wasn't fair, Cloud thought to himself. Wasn't Zack supposed to take his side? Furthermore, how could he defend himself if he couldn't tell Zack what happened? He really looked up to Zack, and he definitely didn't want Zack to know that his peers teased him about being gay. The whole thing was just too embarrassing. He jerked himself out of Zack's grip. Looking up at Zack with eyes full of fury, he spat, "Fuck you! I thought you were my friend."_

_With that, Cloud pushed through the door and took off running. Zack opened the door, and yelled after him, "C'mon Cloud, I didn't mean it like that!"_

_Cloud heard Zack's voice, but he didn't want to turn around, so he just kept running._

"_Shit!" Zack said in frustration as he ran a hand through his mop of black spikes._

_Clapping his hands together he asked, "Does anyone want to tell me what happened?"_

_The trio glared at Dustin pressuring him not to talk, while Dustin kept his eyes on the ground, trying to avoid Zack's gaze. _

_Zack realized none of them were going to talk. With a bitter sigh, he shrugged his shoulders and said, "Alright, well I guess that's how it's going to be." He turned to Dustin and said, "When you see Cloud, tell him I'll be over to see him later tonight." _

"_Yes sir," Dustin nodded in agreement. He then took off running towards the dorms. _

_Zack narrowed his focus onto Aden, and gave him a scrutinizing look. He walked over to Aden and grabbed his chin as he bitterly admonished him. "Listen cadet, I don't have any proof, but I have a feeling you started this whole mess. You better watch yourself because I'm going to keep a close eye on you from now on."_

_Aden kept a straight face as Zack was scolding him because he didn't want to give himself away. He'd never seen Zack this close before. Zack's once friendly sky-blue eyes changed color into a bright cobalt, and they pulsated with rage. For once, he was really terrified of Zack. Aden stammered, "Y-y-yes sir." _

_Zack released Aden and scowled, "Go clean up." _

_The trio nodded and walked eagerly out through the doors because they were glad to get away from Zack. He looked like he was going to explode at any moment. As Zack watched them walk off into the distance, he thought about his earlier exchange with Cloud. So as not to cause property damage, he softly banged the door in frustration. With a note of despair he said, "Oh Gaia, what am I going to do with that kid?" _

~*~*~*~*~

_Sitting at his desk, Cloud was trying to study. All of his roommates were gone, but he didn't really feel like talking to anyone anyway. He figured they were probably out eating dinner. Cloud hadn't eaten since breakfast, but he now felt slightly full from the nausea he incurred from his anger and despair. It had been about an hour since he got tired of running and returned to his dorm. He tried to go to sleep, but as he started to drift off the feelings of fury only increased in intensity. He figured that studying might be able to take his mind off of it, but he'd only managed to read three pages in the last half hour. Concentrating on something else was proving to be very difficult. Just then he heard a knock on the door. "Guess one of those idiots forgot their key again," Cloud mumbled. _

"_Hold on," Cloud said loudly._

_As he unlocked the door he walked back to his desk and grumbled, "Stupid roommates can't even remember their stupid keys." _

_He expected to hear the door open, but instead he heard silence. From his desk Cloud yelled, "It's open."_

_The door opened hesitantly, and Zack peeked his head inside. Upon entering, he saw Cloud sitting at his desk with his chin resting on his hand, turned away from the door. "Hey," Zack said in a friendly voice as he walked towards Cloud._

_Cloud looked up, blue eyes sharp and accusing as he hissed, "Leave me alone."_

_The malice directed towards him made him pause for a second. Zack wasn't using to dealing with such hatred, it felt heavy and cold, making him suddenly aware of the distance between him and Cloud. Shaking it off, he continued to walk over to Cloud. He sat up on the corner of Cloud's desk with one leg hanging off and the other planted firmly on the ground. He held out a small brown paper bag as an offering. "Here, I know you like sweets, so I got you some candy."_

_Trying his best to ignore Zack, Cloud kept his eyes focused on the book in front of him. _

_Zack saw that Cloud wasn't responding, so he gently nudged the bag closer to him. This prompted Cloud to tilt his head slightly towards the bag. Smiling, Zack pulled out a large piece of candy and said, "Look, it's your favorite, a candy chocobo egg! It's got milk chocolate on the outside, sweet creamy white stuff on the inside, and yellow goop in the middle." It was Cloud's favorite, but how Zack knew that was beyond him. Zack started to wave it in front of Cloud as he playfully said, "Mmmmm, doesn't that look good." _

_Cloud's eyes followed the large piece of candy for a while before he snatched it from Zack. He dropped it into a desk drawer, he'd eat it later. Zack looked down at the book that Cloud was reading and asked, "So what ya studying?"_

_The candy offering had eased his mood a bit, so instead of snapping back Cloud just grumbled, "Sword Technique."_

"_Oh, do you need any help, cause I'm great with swords," Zack said with a smile._

"_No thanks," Cloud mumbled. _

"_Oh, okay," Zack said as though he didn't mind. "Hey, so I uh found out what happened." _

"_Yeah?" Cloud asked expectantly, his voice still course with anger._

"_I wanted to apologize." Zack said with a humble voice. "Dustin came by my room later and told me the whole story."_

"_Thanks, I guess," Cloud replied. Not wanting to give Zack the satisfaction of resolving the conflict, he remained staring down at his book._

"_That Aden guy's a real shithead," Zack snorted derisively. _

"_You can say that again," Cloud mumbled._

"_That Aden guy's a real shithead," Zack repeated in the same tone as before._

_Cloud tried to hold back a chuckle because he really didn't feel like laughing at the moment._

"_Oh, what was that?" Zack asked with mock surprise. "Was that a laugh?"_

_Cloud covered his mouth to muffle his laughter. _

_Playfully punching him Zack said, "I think it was. I think it was."_

_Cloud couldn't help himself as he burst into laughter. Zack's goofy stupidity always got the best of him. It was short lived though, and as soon as he was able to, he put a scowl back on his face._

_Zack walked over to the nearest bed and sat down on it. "So, I heard you were getting a birthday card for Tifa."_

"_Well, I was until that jerk interrupted me." _

"_How about we go together, and I'll help you pick one out," Zack offered._

_Shaking his head Cloud said with dejection, "I don't know, maybe it was a stupid idea."_

"_No, it's a great idea!" Zack exclaimed in an effort to help convince Cloud. Before Cloud could refuse the offer, he continued, "Hey, I'll pick you up tomorrow. Then we can go out to dinner afterwards, my treat."_

"_Alright," Cloud acquiesced. It was hard to refuse a free meal. SOLDIERs were paid a lot more than cadets, especially a 1__st__ Class SOLDIER like Zack. It wasn't often that Cloud could afford a nice meal outside of the mess hall. _

_Walking over to Cloud, Zack put a hand on his desk and leaned over. "Besides, who knows girls better than me," Zack said with a big grin._

"_Get over yourself," Cloud snorted._

"_Hey, I can't help it if all the ladies are in love with me," he replied with a cocky air._

"_Ugh, you're such an idiot," Cloud groaned. Looking up at Zack, he feigned annoyance as he said, "Now get off my desk."_

"_Alright, but you have to give me a hug first," Zack said in an amicable tone. _

_Raising an eyebrow Cloud asked, "Seriously?" _

_Zack gave an over-exaggerated nod of confirmation._

"_Well if I would have known it was that easy to get rid of you, we could have done this half an hour ago," Cloud replied sarcastically._

"_Oh, you know you love me Spike," Zack said with a smile._

_Zack held his arms open wide as Cloud stood up from his desk chair. Then he wrapped his arms around Cloud's lower back tightly, and before Cloud knew what was going on, he was being lifted up in the air._

_Zack's strong arms squished all of the air out of Cloud, and he found it hard to breathe. Cloud managed to squeak, "Zaaaaack, put me down," while desperately trying to push Zack away with his arms. His efforts were futile for he was no match against a SOLDIER's inhuman strength. _

_Just then the door opened and all five of his roommates came back from dinner. They caught sight of Cloud's red face up in the air and broke into a snicker. _

_As Zack put Cloud down one of them jested, "Should we leave? We don't want to interrupt." If it were any other SOLDIER officer they probably wouldn't have been joking around with him, but they knew Zack had a good sense of humor, as long as it wasn't a direct insult at Cloud. _

_Turning around with a smile Zack said, "Nope, I was just saying bye to Cloud over here."_

_Walking off, he gave a wave to Cloud and said, "See ya tomorrow Spike." Then he gave a wave to the other five cadets and said, "Goodnight boys."_

"_Goodnight Lt. Fair," they all answered in return. The boys started snickering once again after Zack left._

"_Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," Cloud retorted. _

_It wasn't long before someone turned on the TV. One of the guys shouted, "Hey, it's that sitcom with the hot blond chick!"_

"_Really? Awesome!" another guy replied._

_It wasn't long before all five of his roommates tuned into the TV with rapt attention. _

_Since they were distracted, Cloud went over to his desk and looked inside the candy bag that Zack had brought for him. Inside it was filled with lots of candy chocobo eggs and sour moogle gummies, both his favorites. He chuckled to himself. How did Zack know about his favorite candy? He didn't think he'd ever told Zack about it directly. He must have mentioned it somewhere in passing. How else would Zack know? Zack was something else, he thought to himself with a smirk. _

_The next day Zack took Cloud out and helped him find a suitable birthday card. Then they went out to dinner, and had a good time. Afterwards, Cloud went to work on the card. Zack insisted he get a blank card so that he could write his own message. _

_Cloud pulled out a good black pen and started with the words, "Dear Tifa." Well that part was easy enough, he thought. He continued his message in the large white space below. "Have a Happy Birthday!" Licking his lips in concentration, he tried to think of something else to say. He remembered Zack saying that girls liked sentimental stuff. He continued, but his hand was a little shaky as he wrote, "I hope your special day was fun, and all your wishes came true." Now that he wrote it out, he realized the message sounded much better in his head. Well, there wasn't much he could do about it now. Hopefully, Tifa would appreciate the sentiment. He signed the bottom, "Sincerely, Cloud." Then he sealed it up, addressed it, and ran it down to the "outbox" of the mail room. He wanted to get it out to the mailbox before he changed his mind and decided not to send it. _

_~*~*~*~*~_

_About two weeks later he was sitting in class when his phone went off. He was lucky he remembered to put it on vibrate or the teacher would have taken it away. After class, he checked his phone and saw that there was a message from Tifa. As much as he wanted to listen to the message at that moment, he decided to wait until he was in his dorm room to indulge himself. The rest of the day seemed to drag on, but at 5:00 P.M. it came to an end, and he rushed home before his roommates for some privacy. _

_Upon entering the room, he made his way over to his bed and plopped down. Then he opened the phone to listen to her message. _

_Her voice was sweet with a hint of excitement. "Hi Cloud. I got your card today. I wanted to thank you so call me back."_

_With a sudden sense of dread, he realized that it was now his turn to call her back. He hadn't gotten that far in his thought process prior to listening to her message. Cloud thought darkly, what if she asks me about SOLDIER? What should I say? That I'm a failure and I didn't get into SOLDIER yet? Yeah, I'll win Tifa for sure that way. Girls just love guys that are failures that can't protect them. I could lie about it, but I'm bad at lying, she would probably figure it out. Even if she doesn't bring up SOLDIER, what would we talk about? I don't have anything interesting to say. Why would she like a boring failure like me? _

_Cloud's self-doubt was getting the best of him, but thankfully his logical side stepped in at the right time. He tried to convince himself that he was thinking too much about it, just like he did with every other situation in life. With a mild sense of optimism, he thought, she called me and asked me to call her back so she must want to talk to me. I just hope she hasn't changed her mind. _

_Cloud would need an hour or two to summon the courage to call Tifa, but the timing would be perfect because his roommates would be out for dinner by then. They were bound to be home any minute from class, and he didn't want them in the room while he was talking to Tifa. _

_He pretended that he was sick that night so that his roommates wouldn't suspect the real reason he was skipping dinner. Then he patiently waited until all five of them had left before he pulled out his phone. He prepared for the phone call by giving himself a short pep talk, and reassuring himself that calling her was the right thing to do. With a shaky finger, he started dialing her phone number. After pressing the first five digits of her number into the phone, he lost his nerve and closed the phone. He walked over to his desk, sat down, and put the phone down in front of him. The phone sat menacingly on his desk giving him conflicting signals. It taunted him, told him that he was a coward, yet dared him to be a man and just make the phone call. "Alright, I can do this," he said aloud, faking confidence. He certainly didn't feel confident, but he was hoping the mere act of feigning confidence would be enough. Grabbing up the phone, he took a deep breath, and started to dial her number again. After punching in all of the digits, he started to panic before hitting the call button. He could feel his fingers twitching, aching to close the phone again. His heart started pounding in his chest, and the room felt unbearably hot. Taking another deep breath, he winced as he hit the call button. _

_She answered, "Hello? Cloud?" All she heard was silence so she tried again. "Hello, is anyone there?"_

"_Uh, hi Tifa," he nervously choked out. _

"_Hi Cloud. Thanks for the card," she said pleasantly._

"_I'm glad you liked it," he replied with shy satisfaction. His voice was shaky, but he was trying his best to disguise it._

_There was an awkward pause as both of them struggled to think of something to say next. _

"_So, how is your day going?" Tifa asked_

_In all honesty, he'd spent the whole evening worrying about this phone call. He was too nervous to focus on much of anything. Of course, he couldn't tell her that. Instead he lied, "Oh, it's going okay, and you?"_

"_It's going pretty good over here. So what's Midgar like in the summer?"_

_Eventually they both lost some of their shyness, and their clunky conversation began to flow. He had her giggling some, and she got him to open up a little. He still remained heavily guarded about his supposed role in SOLDIER. In fact, he completely avoided the subject. _

_After a few minutes, Cloud was feeling somewhat confident so he said, "Tifa, there's something important I wanted to tell you."_

"_Yes Cloud?" she asked. If Cloud had been more aware, he would have heard the hope and longing in her voice. Instead, he was so focused on his own insecurities that he didn't notice her subtle hints of attraction. _

_Damn it, he cursed himself inwardly. He lost his nerve AGAIN! He thought this was going to be the day that he confessed his feelings to her, but that would have to wait for another time. He had to think of something else to say and fast! _

"_Tell my mother I said hi," he said. As soon as the words left his mouth he realized that was a lame thing to say. He slapped the palm of his hand on his forehead in frustration. _

"_Oh, okay" she said trying to hide the despondence in her voice. _

"_Thanks," he replied weakly._

_There was a long pause as unspoken words and feelings passed between them. Torn between her affection for Cloud, and her shyness and self-doubt, Tifa quickly excused herself from the conversation. "Listen, I have to go make dinner," she said reluctantly._

"_Yeah, sure, dinner, of course. . ." Cloud said, his voice laced with disappointment._

"_It was nice talking to you Cloud. . . "_

"_It was nice talking to you too Tifa. . ."_

_He lingered on the phone until he heard her hang up. Then he stuffed the phone in his pocket, crawled into bed, and buried his face in his pillow. He was mad, frustrated, and upset with himself. He wanted to disappear into the darkness, and let the numbness of sleep consume him, but life was never that kind, at least not to Cloud. Instead, when he closed his eyes all he could see was her. _

_Tifa had been the object of his wanton desires for a long time now. Her long chocolate brown hair draped gracefully over her shoulders, making her look like a regal princess from a fairy tale. He wanted to run his hands through the silky strands as he pulled her close and kissed her passionately. Those rosebud lips, "Oh Gaia!" they were beautiful, especially when she smiled. He would do anything to make her smile, if only he knew how. He'd often dreamt of those delicious lips and what they tasted like. He craved the taste and smell of her, all of her. He wanted to feel her next to him with their naked bodies pressed together. Then he'd run his hands all over her luscious curves. He yearned for her large supple breasts, to touch, lick, nip, and bite them. As he fondled and caressed them, he'd look into her eyes as she moaned with pleasure. _

_Sadly, his make-out sessions with Tifa were nothing more than fantasies conjured up by his sexual desires. Now he really couldn't get to sleep. He'd have to go take a cold shower before attempting to go to bed once again. Maybe this time he'd be more successful in achieving slumber._

_When his roommates got back they saw Cloud asleep in his bed. They realized he was telling the truth about being sick because he was asleep and it was only 8 P.M. All five roommates went to bed, none the wiser about what really happened to Cloud that night. _

~*~*~*~*~*

Lilleas regained her composure after a while. Brushing Cloud's bangs aside, she took the wet shirt off his forehead, and put the back of her forearm to his forehead. "You're still warm, but it seems like your fever's gone down some." She noticed that his chest was moving up and down in fast steady movements. Lilleas gently placed her hand over his heart, carefully feeling the steady rhythm. Tracing the puckered scars scattered across his bare chest, she sighed softly.

In a voice tinged with sadness she said, "I wish I knew more about you. You're still such a mystery." After pausing for a moment she continued, "There's something different about you."

Lilleas mused, "I wonder if you're an angel. Your eyes are too beautiful to be human. My grandma told me she met an angel once. She told me it didn't have wings, so I asked her how she knew it was an angel. She told me it was a just a feeling. Kind of like how you know the wind is there even though you can't see it. You just know." She stroked his cheek and said, "I don't know if you're an angel, but whoever you are, you seem lost." Offering him a smile of hope she said, "I hope you find your way back."

His smile from earlier had disappeared, and he looked very much in pain. In an effort to comfort him she reached down to hold his hand. Cloud could feel the silken texture of her hand as it glided down his arm and the back of his hand. She interlaced her fingers with his, and he squeezed back firm and strong. Her heart fluttered in her chest, and she couldn't help the smile of pleasure and satisfaction that spread across her face. Filled to the brim with contentment, she let sleep slowly overtake her.

~*~*~*~*~

As they were walking back to camp, many of the children wanted to stop and look at the sunset. It had grown even more beautiful and brilliant since they left the burial site. However, Zack wanted to get back to camp and set the fire up before nightfall. He still had to check out the locked box in the back of the truck enclosure and the glove box in the front of the truck.

The girl holding onto his hand suddenly stopped, which automatically forced Zack to stop. She turned towards the sunset and said in awe, "Wow, it's so pretty."

Seeing that Zack had stopped, the other children took advantage of the situation and decided to stop as well.

With a bit of annoyance in his voice he questioned, "Do you guys really need to see the sunset for the third time today?"

The girl holding his hand turned up to look at him. Her eyes grew really wide, and her little pink mouth started to tremble in a pout, much like a kitten begging for cream.

As much as he wanted to, he couldn't resist that cute face. Somehow girls knew all of his weak spots. With a sigh of defeat he said, "Okay, but this is the last sunset." His tone changed to a more serious one as he tried to reestablish the little authority he had left in the situation. "You hear me everyone. This is the last one. Five minutes everyone, just five minutes." Nodding to Conlin, who had the pocketwatch, he said, "Start timing."

The boy next to Conlin gave him a wink, and Conlin let out a snicker. Unfortunately for them, Zack saw their deviant exchange. Zack had been young once and knew from experience that preteen boys were anything but innocent. He wasn't sure what they were up to, but he had a feeling it was nothing but mischief. "Conlin, get over here," he snapped. Zack let go of the girl's hand that he was holding, and made his hands into fists at his waist.

"Me?! What did I do?!" Conlin cried defensively.

"It's what you're not going to do, so get over here cadet," Zack commanded.

"Fine," Conlin growled. He dramatically drug his feet as he walked towards Zack, trying to impress everyone with his passive aggressive disobedience.

The other children watched the "Conlin and Zack show" with great interest, and Conlin was doing his best to make it a great performance.

Zack decided to play along, he wasn't going to let a preteen boy get the best of him. When Conlin had finally made his way to the front, Zack wrapped his arm around Conlin, put on a big grin, and said in an overly cheery voice, "I'm so happy to see you again cadet. As a reward, you can be my buddy for the rest of the walk back to camp."

Conlin rolled his eyes and grumbled in response. That only made the rest of the children snigger, and Zack smile bigger.

"Let me see the watch," Zack ordered with a grin still on his face. Just in case Conlin was considering disobedience, he squeezed Conlin tightly as a reminder of what 'the hard way' meant.

Grumbling, Conlin handed over the pocketwatch. "I wish I was a girl," Conlin mumbled almost inaudibly.

Zack heard him, but pretended he didn't. He asked in an amused manner, "What was that cadet?"

"Nothing," he griped.

With a satisfied snort Zack said, "Yeah, that's what I thought."

Looking down at the watch, Zack said to the group, "Your time starts now." With mock enthusiasm he pumped his fist in the air and said, "Go appreciate the sunset!"

While the time was running, Conlin decided to ask about his watch. "When am I going to get it back?"

Crossing his arms in front of his waist, Zack said seriously, "I'll let you have it back when you've earned it."

By the sharp edge in Zack's voice, Conlin knew Zack wasn't joking. With a little bit of fear in his eyes he looked up at Zack and said, "What if I don't earn it?"

"Then I guess I have a nice new pocket watch," Zack answered back with a genuine grin.

Five minutes passed by quickly, although not fast enough for Zack, and he went to slip the watch into his pocket before he realized he was only in his boxers. I wonder if my pants are dry yet, Zack thought. In any case they had to get back before he could find out.

"Alright cadets, time's up," Zack ordered. The children let out a collective groan.

"Yeah that's right, groan all you want, we're going back now," Zack grumbled as he started walking back towards camp. The children followed shortly after because they weren't sure that they could make it back on their own. The girl who had previously held Zack's hand ran to catch up with him.

"Huh?" Zack said in response to the loud breathing sounds behind him. He turned around and saw a girl running towards him, the same one who had held his hand from earlier. He let out a bit of a chuckle as her gangly limbs flew across the ground with her little pink tongue stuck out in determination. Now that she was beside him, she reached out a hand with a smile. He grabbed her hand and smiled back at her. "Wow, you're quite the little runner," he complimented her.

"Thanks," she replied, looking up at him with sparkling eyes.

On the other side of Zack was Conlin. Still annoyed from their previous exchange, Conlin decided to do his best to irritate Zack. He had a lot of practice with his parents, so he knew just the right things to say. Conlin whined, "Are we there yet?"

In a plain tone Zack said, "Almost."

Since the whining wasn't working, he decided to switch tactics and change his demeanor to one of innocence as he continued on his tirade. "When's almost?

Continuing in a plain tone Zack replied, "Soon."

"When is soon?"

"Not now," Zack replied patiently

"When is not now?"

"Not now," Zack replied again

"When is. . . " Conlin realized Zack had won the verbal exchange. "Damn it!" he cried.

Zack chuckled in response as did the girl holding his hand.

Within minutes the campsite was in view.

"Thank Gaia! We're back!" Zack cried appreciatively. "You kids are worse than a pack of hungry chocobos," he muttered under his breath.

He waited until the stragglers had caught up with him, and then he said, "Alright cadets, let's head on over to the truck."

Zack was the first one over to the truck. He wanted to look inside to make sure Cloud was okay, so he stepped up onto the ledge to get a better view. When he looked inside he saw Cloud and Lilleas fast asleep, hands still intertwined, with a peaceful expression gracing their faces. They were two broken halves with complementary jagged edges aligned, pieced together to make a whole. A wave of warmth bathed his heart, and a tender smile crossed his face.

Of course, this sparked the curiosity of the other children. Before Zack knew it, there were two girls crowding together on the other ledge wanting to get a glimpse inside. They started to giggle, which only increased the interest of the other children. Before long all of the girls were giggling, and the boys were shouting various words of encouragement to Cloud.

Zack just shook his head in embarrassment. He'd forgotten how immature preteens were. Turning towards the group, he said with a mild hint of frustration, "Give them a break guys. I don't want them to wake them up." Since that statement didn't work as well as he intended, he tried a different approach. Trying to draw their attention away, he said, "C'mon, let's go see what's in that locked box in the back." The children were curious and followed Zack to the back of the truck to see what was in the box.

It was too late though. The window on the other side of Lilleas was open so she woke up to the sound of the other kids cheering and giggling. She looked down and saw that she was holding Cloud's hand. She quickly let go of his hand, and pulled her hand back in embarrassment.

When Cloud noticed her hand had disappeared, he became upset. His hands clenched into fists, and he moaned in frustration through parted lips, "Mmmmmnnnn."

The unexpected sound from Cloud had a sensual edge to it. In response, Lilleas could feel her body heat rise and color her cheeks strawberry pink. Deciding that Cloud's forehead was a safe place for her hands, she put one hand on his forehead and the other one beside her. Cloud's expression seemed to relax again with her gentle touch, but his fists were still clenched. Lilleas noticed the tension in his fists and went about unfurling them. She bent down close to his face and whispered, "I'm sorry you have to fight so hard, but we'll help you get better."

That's when the realization hit her, she didn't know if Zack would take her along with him. He hadn't mentioned it. In fact, he hadn't even told her what they were going to be doing tomorrow. If it came down to it, maybe she could find some way to hide in the truck. Then he'd have to take her along. Whatever happened, she couldn't go back home, not with HIM still living there. She was certain of that now. She was also sure of the fact that she going to try her best to help Cloud find his way back, wherever he was trying to go.

~*~*~*~*~

So I haven't done this yet, but I wanted to thank the first two reviewers, **mom calling**, and **Blue Jae**. If it weren't for them, this would have most likely stayed a one-shot. I also wanted to thank those reviewers that review every single chapter. You know who you are! I can't emphasize how much I appreciate it!!! Thanks also to all those that have reviewed! I didn't realize how significant reviews are until I started writing myself. It really influences the motivation of the author. Thanks also to those that have added me as a favorite, and/or put me on story alert! I'm glad people are enjoying the story ^_^ I also wanted to thank **Blue Jae **for helping me with the Cloti moments in the Cloud flashback! She was awesome, gave me great advice, and helped me improve it. I'm not good with Cloti, I definitely needed help ^_^'

**Author's Note**: Did anyone catch the Cadbury Egg reference? Lol, I was just hoping no one thought it was a real chocobo egg that was candied. Well, that would be pretty big O_o So I was hesitant to put the flashback scene here because I know everyone wants to know what's going to happen to the kids, but Cloud needed some girl action. That was actually a friend's idea. I hashed the story out to him, and he told me that Cloud needed a girlfriend. Well, Tifa's not his girlfriend, but he had feelings for her. The only thing he was getting in this story prior to this chapter was Zack cuddling, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. Lol. Plus I felt a Cloud flashback was needed because his personality is a little flat in the comatose state. He'll become a little more responsive in his semi-conscious state as time goes on. Another thing I should address is that Cloud isn't actually in a coma. Someone that's in a coma can't breathe on their own. They also can't swallow, and can't walk assisted (like the scenes in the game show). They need to be intubated and put on a ventilator to survive. There are several semi-conscious states in between a coma and full consciousness, which is where Cloud exists. This becomes important because it means that Cloud can dream, and have memories. Even though his memories get hazy as time goes by. Another reason for this flashback is that Aden becomes an important character in later flashbacks. Well you'll see ;) As a reminder, the memories are told from a 3rd person point of view. It gives a more detailed aspect of all the characters. As far as Lilleas and Cloud go, well I'm going to keep that very chaste; nothing like Zack/Aeris or Cloud/Tifa. Make of it what you will. I believe love exists in many different forms, and some forms are hard to define. It's more like two lost souls who found each other in a time of need. Well that's just the author's interpretation. This story is rated T, so I'm trying to keep the sexual content above the waist. If you think something is too explicit just tell me, and I'll put a note above that chapter rating it M. My mom and sister can't read the sensual stuff, but I don't blame them. As a side note, it's very difficult for me to write. Lol, it's much easier to read :P


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Towards the back of the truck, the air was thick and rank with anticipation, the smell of it coated the children in a sticky film. The children were buzzing with excitement as they waited for Zack to open up the mysterious locked box in the back of the truck. They'd never actually seen the inside of it before. They knew that it contained food, but they were certain there was also something valuable stored in the box. Their young whimsical minds conjured up images of grandeur. Treasure maps, diamond jewelry, money, gemstones, silver, and gold, nothing was too big for their imaginations. One boy had even hypothesized that a dead body was being kept in there, but his idea was quickly shot down by the rest of the group. They reasoned that a rotting corpse would smell really putrid, and even though none of them had ever smelled a rotting corpse before, they figured it would smell REALLY bad.

As Zack opened the lid of the large locked box, a hushed silence spread over the rambunctious crowd of kids. They stood poised on the balls of their feet trying to get a better look at the scene. Zack's eyes opened comically wide as he took in the full sight of the box's contents.

Eagerness got the best of one of the boys, and he pushed his way through to the front of the crowd. "What is it Lt. Kunsel?!" the boy screamed out.

Zack pulled out a can of processed precooked meat product and held it up high so that everyone could see. With a small chuckle he said, "Was this what you all were hoping for?"

The sting of disappointment pierced them hard and a wave of groans rippled through the crowd.

"You mean that's it?!" another girl asked in disbelief.

"Afraid so," Zack said with a sigh as he shrugged his shoulders. He put the can of meat product down. Much to the chagrin of the children, he pulled out several more. Then he pulled out a few other boring things such as paper plates, plastic knives, crackers, a jar of multi-vitamins, and a few gallon jugs of water.

"Huh? Wait a minute," Zack said as he found something hidden deep in the box.

The children all became quiet again as they watched Zack's eyes open wide with surprise. He lifted out a dark cask filled with some sort of liquid.

"Is it a potion?" asked one of the girls. A potion certainly wasn't as good of a treasure as gemstones or diamond jewelry, but she'd never had a potion before and was curious about the taste. She'd always imagined it to be tart and tangy with the bubbliness of soda pop. Of course potions might taste horrible, but she quickly dismissed that notion because there was no fun in fantasizing about a horrible tasting magical liquid.

"How about poison?" asked one of the boys. He felt it might be poison because he held the secret belief that Xander and Giles were really pedophilic serial killers.

Eyeing the cask in a contemplative manner Zack said, "I think you're both right."

The children exchanged confused glances as their minds swirled with questions. How could something be a potion and a poison at the same time? Wouldn't the effects cancel each other out? Furthermore, why would anyone waste their money on such a useless item? Flicking their eyes back up to Zack they noticed that he was very intrigued by the cask, unusually intrigued.

Unlike the clueless children, Zack had a hunch that the cask stored some kind of alcohol. The cask was dark and opaque so it was impossible for Zack to identify the liquor that way. He took the stopper off the top and took a deep inhalation of the cask's contents. The pleasant aroma quickly infiltrated his nose while the intoxicating vapors permeated the pleasure centers of his brain. He closed his eyes so that he could concentrate on the smell. The predominant aroma was sweet wheat, and there was a hint of banana from the yeast. Zack took another large whiff of the liquor. It smelled like it was some kind of ale. He couldn't remember the last time he drank alcohol, but the smell brought back wonderful memories.

The children looked on in silent amusement at Zack because he seemed totally enthralled with the liquid inside the cask. He was wearing a smile of orgasmic pleasure, and the children felt they were awkwardly intruding on a very personal moment between Zack and the cask. Some animal instinct they didn't yet understand drew them in. As much as they tried to look away, they couldn't tear their eyes away from Zack.

Without thinking of the kids Zack purred, "Now this is the good stuff."

One of the girls raised an eyebrow slowly and questioned, "What's the good stuff?"

Startled out of his reverie Zack said, "Huh?" When he saw the girl staring up at him quizzically he reached out and ruffled her hair. Children are so naïve, he thought. He paused for a second to think of a way to phrase it properly without revealing that it was alcohol. "Let's just say it's an Adult Potion."

In response she asked, "What does an Adult Potion do? "

Another kid chimed in indignantly, "Wait, I thought you said it was a poison!"

Zack let out a laugh at the confused frustration of the children. "Well, it's more of a potion than a poison. It's a potion that makes you feel good unless you drink too much of it. Then it's a poison because it makes you really sick."

Just then the girl came up with a great idea, or at least she thought so. Looking up at Zack with hopeful eyes she asked, "Can we give it to that sick man in the truck?"

Zack lapsed into a fit of laughter at that point. He didn't expect her to come up with something as clever as that. Scrunching his eyebrows in feigned concentration he said, "It doesn't actually heal injuries like my sick friend has. It makes people feel good, but just adults though. It doesn't make kids feel good. In fact it makes kids really sick." He leaned over the crowd of children, and opened his expressive blue eyes wide in feigned horror. He dropped his voice real low, almost to a whisper as he hissed, "For kids like you it's a POISON."

The children jumped back as he emphasized the last word 'POISON.' Zack was fairly confident none of them were going to try it now.

After getting over her fright, the girl who had been asking Zack questions was still unsatisfied by his vague answers, so she asked a few more questions. "So that means I can't have a drink, but how about that sick man? Don't you want to make him feel good?"

This girl isn't giving up without a fight, Zack thought. Hoping to placate her curiosity, Zack responded with a smile as he bent down to speak to her at eye level. "I might give my sick friend some, but only a little."

He was only trying to humor her though. Giving Cloud alcohol would mess with his fragile mental state, which probably wasn't a good idea. Although it might ease the pain if Cloud drank enough, he might vomit and aspirate, which was often fatal.

However, there was no reason Zack couldn't partake of the heavenly liquor. Just a little though, his good conscience reminded him. Being drunk around all those kids would not improve the situation. He made a mental note to store it in the locked box for later retrieval.

Turning to the rest of the group, he clapped his hands together to get their attention. "How about some water?" he asked. Before he could get out the next part of his statement the children drowned him out in cheers. Zack was assaulted with a sea of grubby little fingers reaching toward him.

"Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!" shouted the children in discordance.

He was taken aback by their aggressive eagerness, and reflexively withdrew the jug. There really wasn't a good way to be fair about the whole thing. Making them pick a number for something as simple as water seemed ridiculous. He just closed his eyes, and passed it into the first hands that grabbed it from him. There were three jugs left, but he wanted to save one for dinner, one for the morning, half a jug for him, Lilleas, and Cloud, and the other half for emergencies.

The children were all giving dirty looks to the boy who got the water first because he seemed to be guzzling down more than his fair share. At the sight of water dribbling down his chin, their parched throats ached. The guzzling boy's neighbor nearly pulled it from his hands mid-drink. Zack realized he was going to have to monitor the water sharing or else he was going to have a mini riot on his hands. As it was, he ended up having to use the half gallon emergency supply for the last two kids because the water ran out before it came to them.

Now that their thirst was quenched, Zack figured they would be in a more agreeable mood than they were coming back from the burial site. He couldn't really blame the children for being cranky because they were hungry, tired, and thirsty, and children are especially vulnerable to these ailments.

The crowd was much quieter now, so Zack had no trouble getting their attention. "Alright cadets, we're going to make canned meat kabobs." Zack grimaced a little at the revolting image that statement brought forth, but he was trying to make the best of a bad situation. "We're going to roast it over the fire tonight. Everything's better fried right?"

The children gave a slight nod because most of them were fond of fried food.

"I want the girls to cut the meat into cubes, and the boys to hunt for sticks about this long," Zack said as he held his arms out to a certain length.

The boys took off running while the girls waited patiently for more instructions from Zack. He got them set up in the back of the truck where they started chopping the meat into cubes and putting the finished product on paper plates.

Then Zack took off with the partially empty water jug to get his water bottle so that he could give Cloud and Lilleas some water. His water bottle was in his backpack, so he figured he'd store Conlin's pocket watch in there for the time being. Zack filled the water bottle with water before entering the truck on the opposite side of Lilleas. He knocked on the door to let her know he was coming in because he didn't want to embarrass her again. As he entered the truck both of them seemed to wake up. Rubbing the sleep out her eyelids, Lilleas gave Zack a groggy stare. He handed her the water bottle, and she quickly downed the water.

"Hey, how's Angeal doing?" Zack asked.

The frown lines etched in her delicate face were evident as she said, "He's doing a little better, but he's still in a lot of pain. His fever's gone down, but he's still pretty warm."

Zack bit the inside of his cheek trying to hide the concern that pained him. "Come here Spike," he said with a grunt as he lifted him up.

Cloud moaned with a sleep husky voice as Zack pulled him into his lap. Zack had to slouch down a bit so that Cloud's head didn't hit the top of the truck. Cloud's head drooped onto Zack's shoulder as Zack wrapped one arm around his friend's waist and the other one around his arm.

Zack asked, "How ya feeling buddy?"

Cloud let out a soft pained whimper in response.

Zack let a gasp escape when he noticed that Cloud's hands were shaking beneath him. Zack grabbed both of Cloud's trembling fists, crossed them over his chest, and pulled him close. Then Zack started to gently bounce his legs up and down causing Cloud's body to move in quick little movements, like he was riding a prancing chocobo. Zack would have preferred a rocking motion to help ease Cloud's pain, but he wasn't able to manage that in the truck.

After Cloud calmed down and stopped shaking, Zack motioned for Lilleas to hand him the water bottle, which she handed to him without asking questions. Due to Cloud's split lip, Zack gently pinched both sides of Cloud's jaw to get him to open up his mouth. However, Cloud seemed resistant and kept his teeth firmly clenched. Zack took off a glove so that he could get his finger in between Cloud's teeth and pry his mouth open a little bit more. Usually it wasn't a problem getting Cloud to accept food or water, but he was in a different state at the moment. Cloud just wanted to curl up and sink into darkness to get away from the pain. The water being offered to him was a constant reminder that he was in reality, a painful reality which he wanted to escape from.

The first squirt of water made it into Cloud's mouth, but he winced as he swallowed. Cloud immediately shook the water bottle out of his mouth and clenched his teeth once again. The dark bruises that marred his throat were only a subtle indicator of the agony he suffered when he swallowed. Cloud drank water earlier in the day when Zack found him, but at the time his intense desire for water overrode his pain signals. Unfortunately, Cloud's pain seemed like it had intensified since the initial rescue. Zack put the water bottle down and gingerly moved his hand down the length of Cloud's throat. A soft but distinct guttural sound emerged from the depths of Cloud's throat before his head slumped back against Zack's chest. The last thing Zack felt like doing was torturing his friend so he figured it was best to let Cloud rest for the time being.

"Hey, I'm sorry Spike. I didn't realize your throat hurt that much," Zack said, his voice a mixture of tenderness and grief. "Why don't we try this later?" Zack knew that Cloud could skip food for a few days, but he needed water as the bare minimum for sustenance. He was hoping that Cloud would be thirsty enough later in the night that he would drink. The worst case scenario would involve Zack physically forcing Cloud to drink the water, but Zack disdained doing anything that caused his friend mental or physical discomfort. However, he learned from Sephiroth that sometimes apathy was necessary to do the right thing.

In his effort to comfort Cloud, Zack started massaging the top of his friend's head. Cloud's eyes rolled back into his head, and he uttered low continuous murmuring sounds of pleasure. This brought a half-smile to Zack's face as he said, "You really seem to like this." Still continuing with the head massage Zack said softly, "You just go back to sleep. We'll make a stop into town tomorrow and fix you up."

Cloud sunk into Zack's bare chest, his large pectoral muscles acting as a firm pillow. Cloud thought to himself, Zack. . .so warm and muscular. . .feels nice. . .smell is comforting. . .strong and heavy. . . feral. . . like Nibel wolf. . . I hurt. . . pain. . . head feels like exploding. . . I'm tired. . . tired of fighting. . . just tired. . . I'm sorry. . .so weak. . . Zack. . . so strong. . .safe. . . don't let go. . . I'm tired. . . . . .

Feeling safe in the close presence of his friend, Cloud succumbed to the slumber that tugged on his eyelids. Zack could sense that Cloud was asleep because his body went from the stiffness of a porcelain doll to the limpness of a rag doll. He cradled his friend's limp sleeping form for a few minutes before there was a knock on the side of the truck. The boys raised their sticks high into the air so that Zack could see. "Hang on, I'll be there in a sec," Zack called out to the boys.

Turning to Lilleas he gently laid Cloud back down on her lap. Looking up at her, he said, "I'll be out for a while, but I'll come get you guys for dinner."

As Zack opened up the door to leave the truck, he wiggled Cloud's foot and said, "Hang in there kid."

After Zack left, Lilleas stared down at the young man in her lap. The window behind Cloud wreathed him in moonlight, making his golden hair luminesce with an ethereal quality. The light bent and folded around his form, which lent a glowing quality to his pale porcelain skin. He looked very much like a celestial being, one that had fallen from the heavens above.

After watching a few of their interactions together, Lilleas realized that Zack must have some special connection with Cloud. They were more than mere friends because he watched over the young blonde man with such painstaking care. He cared for Cloud with the tenderness of a father towards his son, but it was something more. It almost seemed that Zack's life was dependent upon that of his friend. She remembered the explanation the raven-haired man gave in regards to the reason Cloud called out the name Zack in his sleep.

"_Well, Zack is a good friend of his from back home. He must miss him a lot."_

The young blonde man couldn't have someone care more about him than the man who just cradled him to sleep. She covered her mouth as she gasped at the sudden understanding she had come to. That dark-haired man named Kunsel was really Zack. Why did he lie to her? What secret was he trying to hide? Who or what were they scared of? She was determined to find out.

~*~*~*~*~

Zack hopped out of the truck to a group full of boys with long sticks in hand. Patting them on the back, he said cheerfully, "Alright, now that's what I'm talkin' about."

One of the boys asked, "What do you want us to do with 'em?"

Pausing to think for a second Zack said, "Why don't we bring them to the back of the truck and start skewering the meat."

"Awesome!" shouted one of the boys as he pumped his free arm in the air. It was obvious to Zack that the children were ready for dinner.

When they came around to the back of the truck they were greeted by the sight of four girls surrounded by a disheveled pile of empty meat cans.

"How are my girls doing?" Zack asked with a smile while leaning on the back of the truck.

"We're almost done," one of them replied plainly, not stopping to look up from the meat she was cutting.

"Our hands are really greasy," another girl complained with disgust. She held up her hands, glistening with the sheen of grease, to show everyone how dirty her hands were.

Zack pretended to be really disgusted to please the girl with the dirty hands. "Well, why don't you finish cutting up the meat, and then I'll tell you how to clean your hands."

She was grateful for the recognition from Zack and went back to cubing the meat.

"Hey, hand me your sticks cadets," he said to the boys. Zack collected the sticks into a bundle and set them down on the edge of the truck. It wasn't long before the girls finished and brought their many plates of cubed meat to Zack. Then they hopped out of the truck.

One of the girls was standing with arms crossed over her chest, and tapping her foot on the ground impatiently. "So how do we clean our hands?"

Leaning over to the girls, as if he was telling them a secret, he said, "Well it's fat so you can't clean it with water. You're going to have to wipe them on your dresses." As soon as the words registered he realized his mistake, most girls don't like to get dirty. He was much more accustomed to the ways of boys and men, and had forgotten about the gentle nature of preteen girls.

"Ewwww!" the group of girls cried as they scrunched up their noses in disgust.

Zack put on a gallant air as he apologized. "I'm sorry. I must have forgotten I was speaking to a group of delicate young ladies here." Walking over to the smallest of the four girls, he bent down on one knee and bowed his head. He took her hand and kissed the back of it. "Could you find it in your heart to forgive me?"

The girl whose hand he had kissed was blushing profusely, but she didn't make any attempt to try and hide it. She was especially pleased that Zack had singled her out to treat like a princess, and she wanted everyone to notice. Looking into Zack's sky-blue eyes rimmed with kindness, she gave him a crooked smile of childlike innocence. He returned her smile with a warm one of his own.

With an encouraging wink Zack said to the group of girls, "What are you ladies waiting for? Go wipe your dirty hands on the boys!"

All five boys looked sharply over at Zack to see if he was joking. Their eyes grew wide with horror as they saw him flash a mischievous smile in their direction. As the girls ran towards them with an impish gleam in their eyes, the boys took off running.

Zack howled with laughter as he watched the boys run around frantically like chickens with their heads' cut off. Through his laughter he managed to shout words of encouragement to the girls. It had been a fairly stressful day for Zack, and he needed that emotional release. It didn't take long before he was bent over from laughter and clutching his side.

Zack was surprised by the speed and agility of the girls. Only two boys got away, one of them being Conlin, while the girls ganged up on the three slower ones. The boys squealed like pigs as the girls clobbered them with their dirty hands. The boys shielded their faces, which was probably the only part of them that wasn't smeared with grease. The two boys who had escaped were chuckling from a distance, somewhere far enough that they didn't have to worry about being caught by the girls.

After the girls had cleaned their hands, they walked back towards Zack with a bounce in their step. Embarrassed by the fact that they were attacked by girls, the three boys smeared with grease sluggishly drug their feet as they made their way back. When all of the children had assembled in front of Zack, they found him still doubled over with laughter.

"I'm sorry," Zack said through gasping breaths. As he saw the disgruntled looks on the faces of the soiled boys, he shook his head and said, "Actually, I'm not really sorry." Then he fell to the ground and rolled around with even more laughter.

The sight of their Lieutenant in a fit of mirth made all of them chuckle a little bit. It was a bit odd seeing a man of such grace and stature on the ground rolling around with laughter. Such behavior seemed more appropriate for adolescents, but then again Zack never failed to surprise them. After Zack had calmed down to a reasonable level he got up to his feet and said, "Alright cadets, now it's time to thread the meat onto the sticks."

One of the boys soiled with grease pointed out, "Wait, won't we get dirty again."

Resting his head on his chin, he said in a contemplative manner, "You know, that's a good point. Hey, I've got a great idea!"

The kids all leaned over as Zack spoke, listening intently to the words he was about to say. "Could the three soiled cadets please step forward?"

Stepping forward, the three boys exchange dubious glances because they didn't think they'd like what Zack was about to say next.

Pointing at the three boys Zack commanded, "You three boys will be the ones putting the meat on the sticks, but. . . "

He was interrupted by the loud groans of disappointment from the three boys.

Zack hushed them by raising his index finger in the air. "Hold on I didn't finish. After everyone else has received their ration of food, you three will get the extras."

The end result was much better than the three boys had expected, and they gave each other high-fives in celebration. The other children were okay with the deal. It seemed fair enough to all of them, especially for the girls. They didn't eat as much as the boys anyway, so their ration of food was already adequate.

"Hey Conlin," Zack said motioning him to come forward. "Do you want to earn that pocket watch back?"

"Uh, yeah," Conlin replied hesitantly.

"I'll give you your watch back if you join in and help these boys make the kabobs," Zack said.

With a sigh Conlin agreed. In a hopeful voice he asked, "Does that mean I get extra food too?"

Squinting his eyes, Zack tilted his head and said indecisively, "We'll see how much food is left. If these three boys have had their fill then you can have what's left."

As Conlin mulled over the deal, Zack put his hand on the boy's back and said convincingly, "You do realize you're getting that nice pocket watch back for doing this."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Okay, I'm in," Conlin replied.

Now that dinner was being prepared, Zack and the rest of the children headed over to the pile of firewood. About halfway there, Zack realized that Conlin still had the matches. He told the kids to keep on walking while he went to go retrieve the matches from Conlin.

Once he'd made his way over to Conlin he requested the matches. With greasy hands, Conlin pulled out the matches and gave a wry smile as he said, "Here."

Much to Conlin's surprise, the grease didn't bother Zack. He took the greasy book of matches with a smile and made sure Conlin saw him wipe the grease off on his bare thigh. Then he took off in a sprint towards the other kids.

The boisterous children danced around the large pile of fire kindling. Under the light of the silver moon they looked like fairies partaking in a joyous celebration. Zack hated to disrupt them in their merriment, but the fire and dinner weren't going to make themselves.

"Alright, are you guys ready to start a fire?" Zack asked enthusiastically.

Jumping up and down with excitement, the children erupted into a cacophony of cheers.

"I guess I'll take that as a yes," Zack said with a grin. "There are a few things we have to do first though. I'm going to need someone to check and see if my clothes are dry," he said pointing in the direction of his wet clothes. The children all turned their heads in unison to see where Zack was pointing. "So do I have a volunteer?"

The children glanced around at each other to see if anyone was going to volunteer. The whistle of the wind and moaning of the trees could be heard because all of the children were silent.

"Don't volunteer all at once," Zack said with a sarcastic lilt.

Realizing that no one else was going to step forward, one of the girls took upon herself to volunteer. Besides, she thought, it wasn't that bad of a job. "I'll do it," she said plainly.

With a nod of confirmation from Zack the girl walked off in the direction of the wet clothes. "Okay, for the second thing I'm going to need two people, but first let me go my bucket. I'll be right back." The children looked over their shoulders at Zack with a questioning glance. What did he need a bucket for?

Coming back with his collapsible bucket, Zack held it up and said, "I need two people to go and fill this bucket up with wet dirt. We're going to use it to put the fire out."

He got more of an enthusiastic response for this task, at least from the lone boy of the group. "Oooo, I'll do it!" cried the boy, reaching his hand up towards the sky.

"Well, that's more like it," Zack said with a chuckle. "I guess I have no other takers?"

The three girls that were left shifted their gaze from the ground to each other, taking special caution to avoid Zack.

With a friendly smile Zack said, "Well I guess I can't expect my respectable little ladies to get dirty again." Talking to the boy with the bucket he said, "You're just going to have to work extra hard."

The boy nodded and took off in a sprightly walk to go find wet dirt. Admittedly, it was kind of fun to have someone tell him to go play in the dirt, or at least that's how he saw it.

Just then the girl that was checking on the drying status of his clothes came back. "The pants are almost dry, but both of the shirts are still pretty wet."

"Well at least the pants are dry. Bring me the pants please," Zack said in a jovial tone.

When she came back with the pants, Zack pumped his fist in the air and cheered, "Woo hoo! Yeah, know I have something to wear!" As he slipped on the pants he suddenly realized something didn't feel quite right, they felt about two sizes too small. That was when Zack realized he had let Cloud borrow his pants. Zack turned around to look at his behind and noticed that instead of being loose, the seat of the pants was stretched taut over his ass. To add insult to injury, the bottom of the pant legs was about four to five inches off of the ground. He did a squat to test things out, but on the way down he heard a startling sound. "Riiiiiiip." With a sense of alarm, he realized what had just happened. "Shit," he cried in a low mumble.

The ripping sound was loud enough that the three girls overheard it. Combined with the look of shock and alarm on Zack's face, they realized that he had ripped the seat of his pants. The three girls covered their mouths in an attempt to hide their giggles. Zack scratched the back of his head, and gave a sheepish smile in return. "I guess this is my friend's pair of pants. I'll have to fix that later." The situation could have been worse, Zack thought. At least he was wearing a pair of dark boxers to match the dark exterior of the pants. Now if he would have been wearing the pink chocobo boxers Aerith gave him for his birthday, that would have been embarrassing. It was beyond Zack to know the reason Aerith felt he needed pink chocobo boxers. He only wore them on special occasions when he knew she'd be looking.

Clapping his hands together Zack said, "The only thing left to do now is to build a fire." Zack and the four girls got to work building the fire. Even though Zack did most of the actual construction of the stick and kindling structure, the girls aided him by handing him various twigs and brush from the pile they had collected earlier. Once the structure was built, Zack realized they had forgotten an important element of a safe fire. Snapping his fingers he exclaimed, "Oh Gaia! I almost forgot to create a fire ring of rocks." Turning to the girls he said, "Okay cadets, we're going to have to find some big rocks to put around the fire so that it doesn't get out of control. Here I'll help out so that we can get this done fast."

The girls scattered in different directions looking for large rocks and collecting them in the bottom of their long skirts. Once they had enough rocks, they set about making a ring around the stick and kindling structure. "It's now time to light the fire. Are you girls ready for this?" he asked the question with boyish excitement. Even though his eyes conveyed a spirit that was much older and more tortured than that of a child, his voice echoed their youthful sentiment. His childish excitement energized the girls to new heights, and they clapped their hands and gave enthusiastic cheers.

It actually took a while for the fire to grow into a hearty flame capable of warming a group of people. By that time the boys had returned with the finished kabobs, the boy with the bucket of wet dirt had also returned, and the children were ready for dinner. Everyone was huddled around the fire, its warmth driving away the chill deep in their joints. Zack told them to stay put and to not do anything until he returned with Cloud and Lilleas.

On his return to the truck he found Lilleas enjoying a light nap and Cloud still immersed in a deep sleep. Upon entering he asked, "Has Angeal been sleeping this whole time?"

Rubbing the sleep out of her eyes Lilleas said, "Yeah, I think so."

"Well that's good. His body needs to rest." Zack looked down at his friend and noticed the pink flush of a fever covering his face. With a half-smile of sympathy he looked down at his friend, who was totally unaware of the sickness consuming his body. Shifting his gaze back to Lilleas he said, "We're going to have to check his temperature and pulse later."

She leaned in closer to Cloud, her sapphire eyes filled with disappointment, and said in a dull tone, "I thought he was getting better."

Mirroring her feelings of disappointment, Zack let out a sigh. "Yeah, I thought so too." Zack was still holding onto the hope that Cloud was suffering from Mako addiction withdrawal, but only time would tell. It had been less than twenty-four hours since his fever started. In any case, he couldn't explain that to Lilleas. Not without telling her more than she needed to know. Pushing up Cloud's knees Zack said, "Excuse me Spike, I just have to check out this glove box real quick." The inside was crammed with an assortment of maps and pens that spilled out upon being opened.

"Oh man, jackpot!" Zack exclaimed. He was in desperate need of maps for navigation purposes. Up until this point, he and Cloud had been wandering around without a clear direction in mind. They'd been using landmarks as their guide, but maps would enable them to plot out a more direct path to Midgar.

He set them down on the dashboard for the moment with the intention of taking them back to the campfire and sorting through them at dinner. "Hey Lilleas, why don't you go join the other kids at the campfire. Cloud and I need to switch pants, and you know how he gets around girls."

The blush of embarrassment crept up on her cheeks as Lilleas thought about Cloud in only his boxers. It's not that she was trying to think of him like that, she reassured herself. Zack mentioned it, and she was only having a normal female reaction to a VERY attractive muscular man in only his boxer shorts. Trying to logically resolve her feelings only made her blush brighter. She tried to leave before Zack caught sight of her, but as she left she could hear a faint chuckle reverberate off the walls of the truck. Raising her hands to her face, she tried to hide her soft pink cheeks as she approached the other children.

~*~*~*~*~

Back in the truck, Zack had some explaining to do to Cloud concerning his ripped pants. As Zack began his story, he avoided looking at his sleeping friend because it would make him feel too guilty. Scratching the back of his head, Zack tried to ease into the conversation, "So, uh, listen Spike. I kind of got a tiny little hole in the knee of my pants." Once Zack saw that Cloud was okay with that much, he continued. "See the thing is that by 'tiny hole' I mean 'big hole,' by 'knee' I mean 'ass,' and by 'my pants' I mean 'your pants.'" Zack spit the whole thing out really fast, "I ripped a big hole in the ass of your pants." Zack cringed as he finished the statement hoping that he didn't incur the wrath of his friend. However Cloud just laid there asleep and motionless, totally oblivious to the whole conversation. Sometimes Zack got carried away with his imagination, and believed that his friend was more responsive and animated then he actually was. As time went on, Zack started believing much more than he was pretending in regards to Cloud's responsiveness. Perhaps it was a sign of burgeoning insanity, or it could have just been the manifestation of his isolation and loneliness. Considering this was one of his only psychological quirks, he escaped relatively unscathed from Hojo's prison.

In a humble voice Zack continued, "So you're not mad at me Spike." He picked his friend's lifeless body up and embraced him tightly. "Thanks buddy." Setting his friend back down he said, "Don't worry, I'll fix your pants up and they'll be as good as new. Well, maybe not good as new, but they'll be fixed."

Zack then proceeded to switch pants with his friend. Cloud was not aware of the big hole in the seat of his pants, but if he knew about it he would have tried to kick his friend's ass. Not that Zack was worried; Cloud wasn't in any condition to beat him up at this point. So as not to feel guilty about such an underhanded trick, Zack kept reassuring himself that he'd have the pants fixed quickly, and in the meantime Cloud didn't mind.

,~*~*~*~*~

A few minutes later Zack returned to the campfire with Cloud cradled in his arms, and the maps and pens stuffed in his pockets. Now that the kids were warm, the bright color of life returned to their faces. They were running around, laughing, giggling, teasing, and eating. Eating?! "I thought I told them to wait until I got back," Zack mumbled under his breath. He could only hope they didn't eat it all. It'd been a while since Zack ate anything and he was really hungry. Just then, two of the girls came over with a plate full of kabobs, perfectly roasted, with some crackers on the side. One of the girls stood in place with her hands behind her back, swaying with anticipation. The other one stepped forward to hand him the plate. With a bashful smile she said, "Here, we made this for you."

Zack's face lit up with elation as he accepted their generous offering. If he weren't holding Cloud, he would have swooped down like an eagle and given both girls a hug before they even knew what was going on. Instead he gave them a big smile and said warmly, "Thanks girls, it looks great. Hey would you mind bringing the plate over to that tree by my backpack." Nodding down at Cloud he said, "I've kind of got my hands full at the moment."

The two girls were pleased that Zack liked the food, and followed along beside him in a jaunty gait. When they reached the tree, Zack sat his sleeping friend up against the tree, and the girl handed him the plate of food. Setting the plate down, he got down on his knees so that he could give both girls a big hug. He could tell it had been a while since they felt some form of affectionate touch because they were initially tense within his embrace. Over the time of their kidnapping they had built up a wall to protect themselves. Zack radiated gentle warmth and melted the thin sheet of ice covering their hearts. As Zack tried to pull away from the embrace he noticed that the two girls had a firm grip on him, they obviously didn't want the hug to end. With a chuckle he said, "I know you girls love me, but you've got to let me go sometime."

They released him with a shy giggle. Afterwards, he gave them each a playful tap on the nose with his index finger. "Why don't you girls go and play with the others."

Flashing Zack a mischievous smile, the two girls joined hands and scampered off to join the others.

Zack let out a sigh of relief for he was finally able to relax for a minute. It was just him and Cloud, the way it was meant to be. As much as he enjoyed the kids, they were a handful. As he picked up the kabob his stomach gurgled in hungry anticipation. Now that the canned meat was cooked, it had a smell akin to bacon instead of dog food. He wanted to savor the flavor, but he was so hungry that he inhaled the first kabob. The warm hearty taste of cooked animal fat coated his mouth and left a pleasant lingering sensation. He paused to look over at his sleeping friend. Putting his hand on Cloud's knee, he gave him a half-smile as he said, "It's a shame you can't enjoy this Spike."

Cloud was still unresponsive so Zack turned his attention back to the kabobs and inhaled a second one. He never was good at eating food slowly. Aerith had pointed that out to him once when they were at a fancy restaurant. He tried to work on it for her, but she wasn't here with him now so he felt free to gobble up the food in a hurried manner. As he was about to pick up the third kabob one of the girls came over to him. He noticed it was the same girl from earlier whose hand he had kissed. When she got close to Zack she approached him with three infinitesimal steps, as though she was scared or nervous about something. Zack grabbed her hand and asked her in an empathetic voice, "Hey, what's wrong little one?" He crossed his legs underneath him so that she could sit in his lap.

She plopped down on his lap and looked up at him with sad eyes. Zack could tell that she was shy about what happened, so he questioned her some more. "Is it one of the other kids?"

She gave a slow nod.

"Was it one of the boys?"

She gave an even bigger nod in response to that question.

"Well, why don't you tell me what happened."

She froze in place like someone had struck her. Zack gently nudged her shoulder to encourage her to talk. Taking a deep breath she said, "It was Conlin. He asked if I knew what the number "69" meant." Uh, oh, Zack thought to himself, he didn't like where this was going. She continued with great trepidation. "I said yeah, it's a number. Then all of the boys laughed at me. I was confused so I asked them what was so funny." She paused for moment. The next part came out clunky and awkward as the words stuck to her tongue. "Then, well, he told me what it meant. . . "

Zack slapped his hand on his face and shook his head in embarrassment for the poor girl. He pulled her off of his lap so that he could get up. Bending over to meet her gaze he asked softly, "Would you mind watching my friend for a minute. I'm going to go have a talk with Conlin." He gave her a friendly pat on the head and turned to go confront Conlin. He found him laughing it up with the other boys.

"Conlin, come here you arrogant bastard," he said sternly. Conlin turned towards Zack with an impertinent smile. He knew exactly why Zack was mad. "Did you just explain the crude details of the term"69" to that girl?"

"Yeah, so what's the problem?" Conlin asked in a nonchalant voice.

"She's like ten years old! She doesn't need to know that kind of stuff right now." Zack's anger was laced with disappointment because he expected better behavior from Conlin.

Conlin stared straight into Zack's eyes, tempting the raven-haired man to strike him down. "Well, I guess now she does."

Zack embraced the challenge, tilting his chin up slightly in acknowledgement of Conlin's defiance. "Yeah, well I guess NOW you're not getting your pocket watch back."

The bubble of confidence Conlin had been floating on broke easily with that last jab from Zack. "Hey that's not fair! You said I could earn it back if I helped make dinner," Conlin cried.

"I also said you had to earn it back, and explaining the kinky details of sex to a young girl kind of cancels out what you did earlier."

"Yeah, but. . . "

Zack cut him off before he could continue, "No buts about it. I'm keeping the watch now."

As Zack turned to walk away, Conlin flipped him off and yelled, "Asshole!"

Zack was going to just brush the insult off, but Conlin had bothered him one too many times today. He turned around and walked back towards Conlin. Getting in his face, Zack said in a calm stern voice, "Maybe you'd like to say that to my face."

Now that Zack was up close he was a much more intimidating figure. Conlin could feel the palpable tension emanating off of Zack's muscular body. His muscles were like strong coiled springs ready to strike. His blue eyes flecked with violet pulsated with rage. The once friendly smile was fixed into the grimace of a lion prepared to pounce.

Zack had managed to assert himself without the use of force. The sheer weight of Zack's close presence broke him down and Conlin turned into a pool of scared little boy. Stammering he said,"N-n-no. . n. . no sir!"

In a haughty voice, Zack replied with a swift up-jerk of the head, "That's what I thought punk."

Walking off, Zack held his chest up high knowing that justice had been served for the traumatized girl. He returned to find the girl sitting next to Cloud resting her head against him. Her eyelids fluttered and head jerked as she tried to stay awake. He didn't want to disturb her up so he just sat next to the Cloud to finish up his food. Zack needed his strength for what was coming up. The inevitable task of telling the children what was going to happen to them was looming over his head like a raincloud, and he was tired of getting drenched by guilt. It was only a matter of time before he gathered the children together and explained the situation.

**Author's Note:** So I initially wrote Chap. 9 and Chap. 10 as one really long chapter, but I ended up separating them. The reason I didn't want to separate them was because Chap. 10 seems a tad melodramatic without Chap. 9. Lol, but on the other hand I didn't want to put out a 16,000 word chapter ^_^' Just keep that in mind when you read Chap. 10. So I actually have the rough draft of Chap. 10 done, and you will finally find out what happens to all of the children, including Lilleas. The revelation was initially supposed to come in Chapter 7, but as I write out the stories they seem to take on a life of their own. I have an outline, but I only write the next chapter after I've posted the previous one. I won't promise anything anymore unless I've written the chapter out. Sorry about that! Regarding the pants, Zack is supposedly 6'3" (Some sources quote 6'1") and Cloud is 5'7" so they most likely wear fairly different sizes. Even if they were the same muscular build a taller person is going to be bigger. For those that haven't played Crisis Core, Zack does squats ALL the time. It's like a hobby of his, so I felt it would only be natural for him to test out the pants that way. Oh yes, regarding the alcohol that was the idea of a friend. He felt that poor Zack needed a break. I agree! Lol, those pink chocobo boxers were for you **Lucifer**! I almost forgot about this. So I don't know if the sexual term "69" is international, but I don't want to explain it here. Lol, that would make this more of an M rating. I'm sure its on the internet though! Just in case you forgot the ages of everyone or needed a refresher: Lilleas/14, preteen children/9-12, Zack/22, Cloud/20. So Zack is 23 when he dies, and this is about a year before death so he's closer to 22 at this point then 23. Cloud is 21 in FF 7 so he's 20 years old right now. This is a bit different than the last chapter, but I hope you enjoyed it ^_^ Thanks again for the reviews!


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Tonight the moon appeared to be hovering dangerously close to Gaia. It was an ominous sign of bad things to come. However, Zack still felt a trace of sympathy for the moon because he realized she had probably been too tired to make the full ascent into the midnight sky. Of all people, Zack knew how hard it was to keep going every single day without rest. Sometimes he wished he could just stop running, but just like the moon, he rose every day without fail.

The children couldn't come with him and tonight he was going to have to break the news to them, but how? He couldn't reveal too much about their dangerous situation because they might unknowingly leak information to the wrong individuals. Shinra was lurking in the shadows with eyes and ears everywhere, waiting to pounce on any new information regarding the renegade experiments, Zack and Cloud.

Then there was also the issue of delivering the news to the children. Maybe he'd start it as a casual conversation instead of gathering them around in a menacing circle like he was about to tell them news of someone's death. It would be best to ease them into the situation, which would make them more amenable to Zack's precarious situation.

He still needed to check Cloud's vitals and try and get him to drink some water. "This night just keeps getting better and better. If Shinra troops were to find us here that would make this night complete," Zack mused with a resigned sigh.

Turning to his sleeping friend Zack ordered, "Don't move. I'm going to go get your water bottle." Zack knew that Cloud wasn't going to actually move. What he really meant by that statement was don't let yourself get kidnapped again. However, holding his helpless friend accountable for his own kidnapping sounded ridiculous, which is why he stuck with the generic phrase 'Don't move.'

When he came back he noticed that the little girl beside Cloud was restless, which meant she was probably in a light stage of sleep. Zack needed her to move because he didn't want her to be freaked out by Cloud's fit when he tried to give him water again. Feeling in a youthful spirit, he decided to play a harmless little trick on her. He could have woke her up and just asked her to move, but this way he'd probably get a laugh out of it.

Getting into a crouch, he put his face very close to her face, only a few inches away. His warm soft breath on her face slowly coerced her into waking up. She groggily opened her eyes to find a big grinning monster right in front of her.

Just waking up, she didn't have the voice to scream so as she opened her mouth all that came out was a small squeak. Trying to get away, she frantically scrambled backwards and wound up falling on her back. That's when she heard Zack's familiar hearty laugh, and realized she'd been duped. He offered her a hand to help her up, but she took it hesitantly because she was a little miffed with Zack. Standing up she aggressively brushed the dirt off of her dress. Looking up towards Zack expectantly, she stood with her arms crossed over her chest waiting for an apology.

His bright blue orbs showed nothing but kindness and sincerity as he apologized. In all honesty, he felt rather bad for giving her such a nasty fright because he only meant to startle her. He had no intention of scaring her so bad that she was probably going to have nightmares for a week about a big grinning monster.

She scrunched up her little pixie nose and furrowed her brows as she mused over his apology. Her voice was strong and full of conviction as she said, "Well, okay, but don't do it again!" Zack was surprised by the boldness demonstrated by the young girl. She had actually acted as though she the authority to order him around. Zack found it cute though and decided to play along. He made sure that she saw him slumped over in defeat before she scampered off to join the other children.

Turning his attention to Cloud he noticed that his friend was still asleep. He tried to concentrate on being apathetic and separating his emotions from his actions. This shouldn't have been hard for an ex-SOLDIER of his caliber, but Cloud had a way of making him feel guilty. Every time he hurt Cloud he felt like he was torturing a baby chocobo. Cloud's sweet innocent eyes were big pools of blue that looked into his with infinite trust. He hated betraying Cloud's trust and the subsequent look of hurt that followed.

Zack figured he would take Cloud's pulse first before he got geared up about the water situation. He was relieved to find that it had come down to 60 bpm, but Cloud's cheeks were still flushed pink with fever. Zack was dreading the next part almost as much as he did Mako injections. Taking a deep breath, Zack slowly exhaled through puffed cheeks. Grabbing the water bottle, he crouched near Cloud. Usually he pulled Cloud into his lap to give him water, but he had to distance himself at the moment.

Shaking Cloud's shoulder he said, "C'mon, wake up buddy."

Cloud's head wobbled on his limp neck, but his eyes stayed closed.

He shook Cloud's shoulder again and accidentally let his frustration come through in a much louder voice. He barked, "Hey! Wake up!"

The recent kidnapping had made Cloud jumpy and more alert than usual because the fear was still fresh in his mind. Even though he was in a deep sleep, the loud voice pierced through the darkness and scared him into thinking he was being kidnapped again. Cloud woke up instantly, his muscles tensed and his back became ramrod straight. Frantically looking around, he expected to see his kidnappers around the corner somewhere. Zack was distinctly reminded of a spooked chocobo. Cloud was relieved when he heard Zack's gentle voice. "Hey, Spike, it's just me."

Now that Cloud was awake, Zack squished Cloud's jaw open and pushed the water bottle in. Cloud had learned from his most recent experience that the water bottle meant pain, and he was going to have none of that. Shaking his head, he managed to get the offending object out of his mouth. He fixed his mouth into a grimace and clamped his teeth down hard. Zack tried to comfort Cloud by stroking his head, but his efforts fell flat. Cloud was more determined than ever not to drink the water. Deciding to try again, Zack went to open Cloud's jaw again, but Cloud had switched to playing offense. With his mouth open wide, Cloud jerked himself forward and took a big bite out of Zack's hand. The thing about chocobos is that they're usually friendly, but when they bite they bite hard.

"Owwww!" Zack growled. He had to forcefully pull his hand free because Cloud had a pretty strong grip on him. Once his hand was free, he pulled off his glove to examine the damage. His leather glove had bite marks and two holes on each side where Cloud's incisors managed to chomp through.

As he examined his hand, he noticed a fresh hemicircle teeth imprint on both sides of his hand and a few places where Cloud's teeth had broken through the skin. "Damn it Cloud!" Zack snarled at his friend. Looking down at his friend, he saw him smacking his lips, trying to get the bitter taste of leather out of his mouth.

"Yeah, I hope you liked the taste of that," Zack said with bitter sarcasm. He narrowed his eyes seriously at the blonde in an attempt to make him feel guilty, but Cloud looked back at him with amusement. The corners of Cloud's mouth lifted into a smirk and his eyes glistened with impishness.

Pointing an accusing finger at the blonde Zack said in irritation, "Oh, so you think this is funny?!" He drew out the last word and emphasized it. Zack managed to refrain from slapping Cloud across the face by hanging onto a thread of self control. Even though he was mad, he knew that Cloud didn't fully understand the consequence of his actions. He crouched down by Cloud to admonish him instead. Firmly grabbing Cloud's face in his hands, Zack looked at him sternly as he said, "I'm trying to help you asshole."

Cloud's eyes flicked up under long lashes to glare at Zack. Much to his surprise, instead of the usual haze that covered Cloud's eyes they were clear like mountain spring water. Zack noticed there was something else swimming in the depths of Cloud's deep pools of blue, a faint glimmer of life.

As irritated as Zack was at his friend, he was overjoyed that he saw some spark of animation in Cloud. Zack had become so accustomed to the dull lifeless expression that Cloud usually wore that he almost lost hope that his friend would ever come back to life. Even if it only lasted a minute or two, it was progress in the right direction.

Unable to contain his excitement, he dove into Cloud and wrapped his arms around him in a big hug. Cloud was still mad at Zack so he stayed tense, but allowed Zack to embrace him. After about a minute, Cloud had enough hugging so he started to wriggle himself free. Zack loosened his grip so that Cloud could think he was strong enough to escape. It was a small victory for Cloud, but Zack knew that even minor things were important in building back his friend's fractured psyche.

He let out a soft chuckle because Cloud's aversion to hugs reminded him of the old Cloud, HIS Cloud. The Cloud that existed before Jenova, Hojo, and Mako had broken, shattered, and destroyed him. Zack had been trying to hold onto the fragments of Cloud's psyche, but they were like grains of sand that slipped through his fingers. With the course of time, the grains of sand only became finer making it even harder to hold onto. Zack couldn't piece Cloud back together by himself, he needed Cloud's help, and it looked like Cloud had been doing his part.

Pulling back, Zack was still wearing a big grin on his face as he looked at his friend. Ruffling his hair playfully he said, "Didn't your mom ever tell you not to bite the hand that feeds you?"

A trace of a smile made its way onto Cloud's face along with a small snort. It was like he was trying to laugh, but had forgotten how.

Zack took notice of Cloud's weak attempt and said, "Don't worry, we've got lots of time to practice." After picking up his friend he said, "Hey Cloud, we've got to talk to the kids now. We'll try that water thing later."

~*~*~*~*~

When he made it back to the fire, he was surprised to see the children huddled in a disheveled heap instead of actively running around. Unfortunately for Zack, they had been going non-stop since their rescue, but now it looked like someone had taken their batteries out. Zack was thankful for whatever higher power had managed to accomplish that feat.

Lilleas, who was lying huddled over the girls, perked up at the sight of Cloud and Zack. "Hey you're back!" she said with hushed excitement. Gently pushing a girl off of her lap she ran over to them. Zack paused so that she could speak to Cloud. She brushed the hair out of Cloud's face and said in a sweet voice, "I hope you're doing better." Then her expression turned serious as she turned to Zack and asked, "How's he feeling?"

"How's he feeling? He bit me, that's how he's feeling." Zack said it in a much lighter tone than would be expected for someone that had been ferociously bitten.

"What did you do to him?!" she spat defensively.

Zack let out a chuckle before speaking with a hint of exasperation. "What did I do to him? He's the one that bit me! I tried to give him water, and he didn't like it."

"Oh," she said in a short burst of embarrassment. She opened her mouth to say something, but Zack gave her a look telling her that he understood.

Lilleas walked back to the group and settled down by the girls while Zack took a spot a few feet from all of the children. Zack got down on the ground, propped his knees up and spread his legs apart, essentially making a chair out of himself for Cloud to lounge in. He then braced himself by putting his hands behind his back.

With his head against Zack's chest, Cloud could hear the soft staccato beat of his friend's heart. It was a familiar tune he had often heard as a child while falling asleep on his mother's chest. The gentle rhythm soothed Cloud's anxious heart and it wasn't long before he fell asleep again.

The children were silent and looked at him with a sense of dread because they knew what he had come to talk about. Zack was going to start the conversation casually, but he figured it was pointless to ignore the white elephant in the room. "So I guess you kids have figured out I can't take you along."

"So what's going to happen to us?" one of the boys asked anxiously.

"You're not going to leave us here in the woods are you?" one of the girls piped up. Her voice was shaky, and sounded like she was on the verge of crying.

Zack grit his teeth and ran a hand through his dark mop of hair. This certainly wasn't going over as well as he hoped. Shaking his head he replied, "No, don't worry I'm not going to leave you here. You all have homes I assume." He looked around to see everyone nodding in agreement except for Lilleas. "So I was thinking about dropping you off on a main road about ten to five miles out of town. I was going to split up the money in the wallet, which should be enough to buy you food and transportation to get home."

"Why can't you take us into town?" a girl asked. She was absently drawing figures in the dirt with her finger while waiting for Zack to answer.

Zack's eyes shifted uncomfortably as he tried to come up with a suitable explanation. "Well, I just can't walk into town with ten kids because it would look too obvious. My friend and I are being chased by some bad guys, and they have spies everywhere. We're trying to stay hidden, and hauling around ten of you makes that really difficult."

"Cool, so are you guys criminals?!" asked a boy excitedly.

Zack slapped his palm on his face and drug his hand down in irritation. "No we're not criminals," he said in a mocking voice. "We're. . ." his voice trailed off because he didn't really know what they were. He hadn't really stopped to classify himself as being anything other than human.

Before anyone else could ask a question he took control and said, "Alright, that's the end of this discussion. I'm going to split up the money tomorrow morning, and give it to each of you before you leave. In the morning we're going to plot out a route, and I'll give you guys a map to follow into town." Looking over in Lilleas' direction he could see that she looked distant, as though she was trying to separate herself from her emotions. "Lilleas, do you think you can lead the way?" She gave a resigned head nod. He realized he needed to talk with her before the kids went to sleep, but before he could stand up he was approached by the group of girls. They gave Zack and Cloud an awkward group hug as they tried their best to hug the two men who were sitting on the ground. After they were done, Zack flashed them a big smile of appreciation.

"We'll miss you Lt. Kunsel," one of the girls said bashfully

"Can we kiss the pretty blonde man goodbye?" asked another one of the more daring girls.

With a chuckle he teased, "What, you don't want to kiss me?"

This generated a harmonious set of giggles from the girls.

"We can kiss you too," said another girl softly. She tried to turn her head away because the pink was creeping up in her cheeks.

Another girl finished her thought. "It's just he looks like he needs it more than you."

Zack gave a gentle nod of understanding, and the girls formed a line to kiss Cloud. After giving Cloud a peck on the forehead the girls lined up by Zack. The littlest girl, who Zack had taken a special liking to, made sure to get in the back of the line. He lifted his cheek up so that they could give him an innocent kiss. When it got to the end of the line the littlest girl took Zack by surprise and threw her arms around his neck.

She pressed her warm little face into his hair, breathing him in so that she had something more than a face to remember him by. "Thank you for saving us Lt. Kunsel," she said softly into his ear. "Also, thanks for taking care of Conlin for me. He's real nasty." As she stepped back she looked at him with the innocent admiration only a child possesses. "You'll always be my hero." Then she gave him a quick peck on the cheek and ran off before she could see his reaction.

Zack was stunned to say the least. It had been the first time anyone had openly called him their hero. He may not be able to save the world, or even able to save Cloud, but he had saved this girl. It was a nice warm feeling, but something more that he couldn't quite decipher. To his closest approximation it seemed to be a mixture of excitement and joy, he definitely liked the feeling.

He was about to relish in the moment when the boys came over to say their goodbyes. Slapping him on the back they all thanked him for his bravery, and for killing those bastards with the biggest ass sword they'd ever seen. As the boys were turning to leave Conlin asked, "So am I really not getting that pocket watch back?" Zack's dirty look answered his question and he sidled up to the group of boys as they walked back.

As the children prepared to go to sleep, they gathered together in a huddled mass to share their body heat. The girls were in one lump, while the boys were in another, with only a thin line of space separating the two groups. It was too cold to be picky about the situation. Sitting off away from the group, Zack noticed Lilleas with her knees pulled up to her chest and her head resting in her arms. Picking up Cloud, he walked over to her and motioned for her to follow him. He didn't want to have a private conversation with her in the company of the other children.

Once they were out of ear-shot from the other children, Zack sat down and pulled the sleeping Cloud into his lap while Lilleas sat down beside them. She was still silent waiting for Zack to make the first move. With a sigh Zack began, "Look, I know you want to come with us, but you have no idea how dangerous it is." He looked into her face, and saw a flicker of understanding so he continued. "I can't really tell you much more, but they're an evil group. If they caught you they might kill you or do something even worse." Zack flinched at the last part of that statement. Shinra could make death seem kind in comparison to the nasty secrets they kept underground in the labs. "I could never forgive myself if something happened to you."

Her voice came out in a soft whimper, "I can't go home." By the pensive look on her face he could tell that she probably didn't want to talk about it. Sweet Shiva, he thought to himself, what was he supposed to tell her? Racking his brain for something decent to come up with, she spoke once again. "I think I understand what you're talking about." Seeing the confused look on Zack's face she continued, "I mean I don't understand your situation, but I know what it means to have to go alone in this world."

Lilleas averted her gaze because she knew she would break down if she saw Zack's kind face. The last thing she felt like doing now was blubbering like a baby. Shaking her knee Zack said, "I tell you what, I'll think about it."

By the sincerity in his voice, it sounded like he was telling the truth instead of just trying to blow her off. However, Lilleas had learned early in her life that you couldn't trust people so easily, so she was doubtful he would stop to consider it.

Trying to change the subject, Zack asked, "Do you want to help me give Angeal some water? I REALLY need some help with it, and he likes you."

Lilleas would have refused, but looking at Cloud's sick face made her reconsider. She gave a silent nod in response.

With a half smile of sympathy he looked at her and said, "Why don't you calm down, and I'll come get you in a little bit." As she started to get up Zack pulled her hand and said, "Actually, wait for me. I need to go and put the fire out."

They walked together in strained silence to the place where the children were nestled, and Lilleas went to join them. Zack placed Cloud by Lilleas and said, "He hates being cold. Could you keep him warm for a little bit. I'm just going to put out the fire."

~*~*~*~*~

After putting the fire out, Zack went to get the water bottle and then fetch Lilleas. She had fallen into a light sleep while waiting for Zack. Gently shaking her he said softly, "C'mon, it's time to give Angeal some water."

With a dazed look, she started to rise to her feet. Zack gave her a hand and helped her up. "Why don't you grab the water bottle, and I'll grab Angeal. Stay close by my side."

With his Mako-enhanced vision he could see through the dark, certainly not as well as he could see in the day, but well enough to make his way around. He scooped up his sleeping friend while Lilleas grabbed the water bottle. Close together, they slowly but carefully made their way over to the truck. When they got to the truck, Zack handed the keys to Lilleas and directed her to open both doors.

Stepping up on the truck ledge, Zack hoisted Cloud head first into the truck. He had Lilleas hold open the door by Cloud's legs so it didn't accidentally close on him. Then he ran around to the other door so that he could pull Cloud all the way through so that he was fully outstretched on the seats.

With a stern voice Zack said, "This is the plan." Before he could continue, he took a big gulp in an attempt to swallow the bitter taste of guilt. Looking straight into her eyes he said, "I'm going to brace his head with his mouth open, and you're going to get the water bottle in between his teeth and squirt the water into the far back of his throat."

"Won't that be uncomfortable?" she asked, her voice wavering with distress.

"No Lilleas, it's going to feel great," he said with dark sarcasm. With a sigh, he hung his head before he returned her gaze. "Of course it's going to be uncomfortable. I really don't want to do it either, but do you know any other way of getting this water into his body?"

She knew that Zack was right, but that didn't make it any easier. Turning her head to the side so that she could be alone with her thoughts, she contemplated whether she could do what Zack asked of her.

In a kind voice shaded by despair Zack said, "Listen, I'm sorry I sounded a little harsh. If you're not going to do this then I'm going to have to wake up one of those other kids to do this. I know Angeal doesn't understand what we're doing, but he needs this."

He looked at her pleadingly, his deep blue orbs conveying the urgency of the situation. Biting her bottom lip to hold in her feelings of indecision, she gave a silent nod. He nodded back in confirmation before giving her further instructions. "Okay, you're going to have to straddle his thighs so you can get up close. Also, he's probably going to try to kick so be careful."

Beneath her strong mask of determination, Zack could see the uncertainty and embarrassment she was trying to hide. Trying to reassure her he said, "Don't worry Lilleas, he's probably not going to remember this. At least I hope not."

Zack lifted up Cloud's head and pulled him close to his chest in a partially reclined position. Then he patted his cheek and said, "C'mon Spike, we need you to wake up."

Lilleas saw the confused and dazed look on Cloud's face as he woke up. She tried to muster a smile for him and gave a friendly wave. By the glazed look in his eye, she doubted that he even saw her. "Is it really necessary for him to be awake for this?" Lilleas asked, the concern evident in her voice.

"Yeah, if he's asleep he'll choke on it," Zack replied gruffly.

~*~*~*~*~

In his partially delirious state of pain and fever, all Cloud could hear was mumbling, but it sounded like Zack and that nice girl in pink. They were nearby, but they sounded upset. He felt very tired, but as he tried to close his eyes again he could feel someone patting his cheek. Cloud tried to shake off his sleepiness so that he could wake up and figure out what was going on. All of a sudden he felt his head pulled back and his jaw yanked open. Then something was shoved in his mouth, which Cloud figured must be something like a gag to stop him from screaming. He tried shaking his head to rid himself of the object stuffed in his mouth, but a pair of hands was squeezing his head tight and holding it firmly in place. Then he felt someone strong pin his arms to his side. Panic set in, but as he tried to squirm away the forces holding him down just got stronger. Someone must be trying to kidnap him again. What if someone was harming Zack?! He could definitely tell that Zack was near. He had to scream and warn Zack of the impending danger!

~*~*~*~*~

As Zack was restraining Cloud from any possible movement, Lilleas paused before she could squirt any of the water into his mouth. Her eyes were wide with horror, and she was eerily still, like an animal caught in the headlights of a car.

"Damn it Lilleas! C'mon!" Zack screamed straining his vocal cords. "Let's get this over with quick. Can't you see, he's freaking out?!"

She resolved with fierce determination that she had to do this. Being hysterical and paralyzed with fear wasn't an option, at least not now. She vowed to help Cloud and she couldn't back out now that things had gotten tough. Ignoring the churning in her stomach, she started to squirt the water at full force into Cloud's tense mouth.

~*~*~*~*~

All of a sudden, Cloud heard the harsh voices come to an abrupt end. Then he felt a flood of liquid entering his throat, it felt like he was drowning. He tried to scream, but the water quelled the sound from deep inside his throat. The only thing that came out was a pathetic gurgle. The force of the water was too great and he couldn't help but continuously swallow the massive amount filling his throat. Each time he swallowed it felt like there was a burning hand clenched around his throat, squeezing tight and cutting off his air supply. His panic turned into sheer terror as he realized his captors were trying to kill him. He was going to die. He'd been fighting against death for so long, and this was how it was going to end. His writhing form stilled as he realized death wasn't so horrible now that it was actually upon him. Death in itself wasn't physically agonizing. It was only the afflictions that caused death that were the painful part of the whole dying process. He wasn't scared anymore, just sad. He wanted Zack, to touch him at least one last time before he left this world. Tears came, but none fell. He didn't want to die alone. . .

~*~*~*~*~

It took Lilleas about a minute to empty the contents of the water bottle into Cloud, but it felt like much longer. Zack laid Cloud back down on the seat of the truck so that he could rest. He found it highly disconcerting that Cloud went from thrashing about to being deathly still towards the end of the ordeal. Hopefully, Cloud wouldn't remember this the next day.

Both Zack and Lilleas were panting hard from sheer exhaustion. Even with his super enhanced strength, Zack strained every muscle fiber in his arms trying to hold Cloud still. Disgusted with themselves, they couldn't look at each other or Cloud. Perspiration poured down Zack's face, stinging his eyes and salting his lips. The word _monster_ kept coming to him, filling his brain until he thought his head was going to explode from the pressure. Trying to chase those awful thoughts away, Zack reminded himself that he wasn't Hojo. He wasn't torturing Cloud, he was helping him instead. So why did he feel so guilty?

Zack reached out and caressed Cloud's cheek. He bent down to place a gentle kiss on the top of his friend's forehead. The tears finally escaped from Cloud's eyes and rolled down his pale porcelain cheeks.

Not able to find his voice immediately, Zack struggled to choke out, "Don't do that Spike. You're going to make me cry." Zack pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes to prevent the moisture from actually forming into tears.

In the background he heard Lilleas sobbing like the child she was. Her hands were shaking as her body undulated with the sadness that was racking her body. She'd acted so mature up to this point that Zack almost forgot he was dealing with a young teenager. Lilleas stared up at him, studying his face as though he held onto a secret of the Ancients. She noticed that the weary warrior looked much older than he appeared earlier in the day. He was much closer to Cloud than she was, so she couldn't fathom how torn up inside he really was. A feeling of guilt, sadness, and dread clenched her stomach. She needed something or someone to hold onto to keep from being swept away by her emotions.

Then she lunged at him, and threw her arms around his neck. Zack was a bit startled by her forceful hug, and reached out with both arms to hold the side of the doorframe so that she didn't push him off the ledge. As he wrapped his arms around her, the tears fell hard and heavy from her eyes, flowing in a crystal clear rivulet down his shoulder. He ran his hands through her silky brown tresses trying to calm her down.

He whispered in her ear, "Hey, it's going to be okay Lilleas. You didn't do anything wrong. Trust me, Angeal's real strong, he's going to be okay."

She pulled back and sniffled, "Promise?"

Zack was starting to grow bitter at the fact that everyone wanted him to make promises to them, like he was a god with the exclusive power to grant prayers. Damn, he wished he could. He wished life was that simple and worked out like everyone wanted it to. He never stopped hoping that everything would work out for the best, but he knew that wasn't always the case. Only in fairy tales did "happily ever after" come true. However, she needed to hear some encouraging words at the moment, some confirmation that life was going to be okay. It was what she needed now, no, it was what they both needed now. Meeting her gaze, he tucked her hair behind her ears and said in a solemn tone, "Promise."

Wrapping her arms around him again, she pulled him into an even tighter embrace.

Up until this point he was unsure of whether he should take Lilleas along with them on their journey. He didn't want to be making the wrong decision for selfish reasons. She would be quite helpful on their trek across the globe, and Cloud seemed to like her, but he didn't want those to be factors in his decision. He knew their journey was dangerous, much too dangerous for a sweet and innocent teenager like Lilleas. Nonetheless, he saw now that she needed them as much as they needed her. With a warm voice he said, "Lilleas, why don't you come along with us. At least until you figure things out."

Pulling back once again, lips pursed in a soft pout, she nodded her head in confirmation. If it weren't for the sadness that consumed her at that moment, it would have been an eager head nod, but instead it was a slow and certain one.

Zack pressed a light kiss on her temple before lifting her out of the truck. Setting her down, he went back in the truck for his sleeping friend. After pulling his friend's limp body out of the truck, he cradled him as they walked back to the other children. Lilleas remembered the routine and stayed only a footstep behind Zack.

When they got back to the sleeping children, Zack was pleased to see that they were just as he left them, sleeping in a huddle. He gently laid Cloud down near the mass of children, whereby he curled up in a fetal position, trying to protect himself from the dangers of the world. Lilleas paused, almost as if waiting for instructions from Zack.

Zack put his hand on her back and said with a gentle smile, "Why don't you go to sleep near Angeal. He doesn't like to be alone."

Lilleas gracefully stepped over the other children and came down to rest near Cloud.

Before she could lie down Zack said, "I'm going to step out for a bit. I'll just be in the back of the truck if anyone needs me."

"Okay," she said in response. As Zack turned to leave she curled up facing Cloud and reached her trembling fingers out towards his hands. Wrapping her hands around his, she rested her forehead against him and fell asleep.

~*~*~*~*~

Zack quietly crept out of the campsite so as not to disturb the children. He wasn't quite sure of the reason behind it, but he felt the need to get away again. He promised Cloud that he wouldn't leave again, but he was just going over to the truck so in essence he was still keeping his promise. Lilleas knew where he was so she could find him if there were any problems with Cloud. As he approached the truck he remembered the alcohol that was stored in that box in the trunk. He'd been so busy during the night he hadn't really thought about it again until now.

Upon entering the back of the truck he took out the cask from the unlocked box. He pulled off the stopper and took a big swig of the light amber colored liquor. The intoxicating taste swept him away. The chalky wheat sweetness gave way to a dry and refreshing aftertaste. One sip turned into another until he had finished the cask. He was glad the cask was only half full or he would have had a bad hangover the next day. As it was, he felt slightly buzzed, but Zack could hold his liquor well. His worries and fears slowly dissipated as his ethanol laden blood coursed thick, and the effects of the alcohol slowly took over. He felt himself surrender logic in favor of nonsensical thought. He had the sudden urge to crack a few jokes and laugh, but was alone so he stayed silent instead. It was a nice relaxed feeling that he wished he could feel more often.

He crawled out of the truck, lied down on the ground, and put his hands behind his head as he looked up at the stars. He let his drunken stupor fade as he ruminated about the events that took place that day, which eventually led to thoughts of Aerith.

"I made a promise to you too Aerith, in Nibelheim." He paused, his voice becoming heavy with emotion, "I promised I'd come see you again right after the mission was over. It was the last time we spoke. . . " His voice trailed off as he felt the words getting stuck in his throat. Zack felt the grief crawl in the pit of his stomach, a sick nauseous feeling. Anger came as a slow feeling of warmth, but it rapidly grew into an all consuming fire that threatened to ravage his insides if he didn't blow off some steam. He exploded, pounding his fists into the ground. "Damn it! It was supposed to be an easy mission. Things weren't supposed to be like this!" His voice turned dark with anger as he said, "I'm not going to let those Shinra bastards can keep me away from you."

Zack waited a few minutes until he felt the heat slowly dissipate through his skin and into the cool night air. Sitting up, he spread his knees out in a comfortable position and placed his hands behind his back. In a solemn tone laced with sadness he whispered, "I miss you Aerith."

~*~*~*~*~

In the least likely of places, the Midgar Slums, a princess named Aerith awaited the arrival of her prince. In the ruins of an old church, she bided her time until his return because he made a promise that he would come back for her. At his suggestion, she wore a pink gown in preparation for his arrival. He should have come home soon, but it's been years and she's growing tired. She could feel his spirit fading, a cold numbness, a dark void that grew heavy within her being. Her kingdom of flowers waited for the return of their prince, but they too have grown weary and weak. She carefully tended her flowers, but her soul was weak and distant. As she cried, she bathed the flowers with salty tears, and they withered under her grief. They tried to comfort her, but they weren't her prince, they weren't Zack. She wore a crown of flowers symbolizing her close connection to Gaia, a common bond she shared with the ancestors before her. Lying down on the floor of the church, she clasped her hands over her left breast and spoke the words that flowed from her heart.

I lie in church, eyes closed to avoid lights jagged edge,  
my mind blazing with thoughts of you.  
Years have passed since I last saw you.  
The outline of your face is already fading,  
fading from my memory into a blur.  
The sugary smell of lilies floats through the air,  
and pervades my thoughts,  
but only for a moment.  
I wish to take retreat from my remembrance of you,  
your fingers gently interlaced with mine.  
It's breaking up now, hard to recall,  
your face as we exchanged smiles. . .  
The buzz of silence is maddening, cutting into my thoughts, and my eyes open.  
In my heart the fire still flickers, the flames licking at my sanity.  
As desire swells I cannot escape,  
my insatiable appetite for you.  
The sugary smell of lilies turns rancid,  
and my eyelids grow heavy,  
just thinking of you.

After emptying her heart of sorrow, a single tear rolled down from her cheek. "Come back home Zack. I love you and I'm still waiting for you, but it's getting harder. I'm sorry my dear prince, but I can only wait so much longer."

~*~*~*~*~

He stared out into the vast expanse of the midnight sky, hoping she could hear his voice if he just focused enough. With conviction he stated, "Wait for me Aerith. I still love you very much, and I'm coming home to Midgar to see you, just as soon as I can."

Zack stayed like that for a while, reflecting on his love for Aerith. The brisk night air was a sharp reminder of the children sleeping in a huddled mass, and he decided to return to the campsite. Walking slowly around the children, he searched for a mess of blonde spikes with a pink bandage tied around it, Cloud's new trademark look. Even though he thought it might be difficult, he had no trouble finding his friend in the dead of night. Cloud's golden hair glowed in the light of the moon acting as a beacon to guide Zack back to him. "There you are Spikey. Trying to hide from me again, eh? Next time you should cover up that blonde hair, it really gives you away," Zack said jokingly.

He lied down next to Cloud and curled up around his friend's sleeping form. Zack carefully positioned himself so that his friend's head fit under his chin because he wanted to avoid aggravating the bandaged gash on the back of Cloud's head.

So as not to wake anyone up Zack whispered to Cloud, "I'll find a way to fix you up tomorrow. You'll see. I'll make it better."

All Zack could hear was the hum of chirping crickets because Cloud was silent in response. After the traumatic episode he suffered earlier in the night, Zack didn't think Cloud was going to be very responsive for a while.

As Zack drifted off to sleep, a memory flashed before him quick and sudden. Some memories were filed away neatly and he could pull them out at will, but his darker memories were scattered around his subconsciousness and mounded in disheveled heaps. He couldn't control the timing of these dark lurid memories for they seemed to happen randomly when he closed his eyes. The horrible reminiscences from Hojo's lab were burned into the back of his retinas and still pulsed with the same heat. Even the benign memories from Hojo's lab seemed to be lumped together with the abhorrent ones. He was never sure what triggered them, but closing his eyes or being surrounded by darkness was always a necessity. They played over in his mind like the movie reel of some sick twisted horror movie. Once a dark memory started, it was hard to escape because even if he did open his eyes, the memory would resume once he closed his eyes again. Thus, he had more than a few sleepless nights on account of these dark lurid memories. Tonight as he closed his eyes the darkness was shaded green, the bright glowing green of Mako.

~*~*~*~*~

_On a cold winter night in Hojo's dungeon, Zack was curled around his friend as they shared Cloud's cot by the wall. They were given a thin blanket to cover themselves at night, which sufficed during the warm and mild seasons, but was immensely inadequate during the frigid winters. Nibelheim had merciless winters that didn't take pity on unfortunate souls, like that of Zack and Cloud, who were imprisoned in a stone cold dungeon._

_Hojo didn't care if his specimens were comfortable, only that they didn't die. He felt that it was best if they were uncomfortable because it aided in the process of breaking them. In a physically agonizing state an individual's desire for higher logic wanes and basal animal instincts predominate. Hojo needed to strip them of their humanity before he could build them back up in Sephiroth's image. He wanted to create angels of death, powerful creatures lacking free will that answered the call of Jenova. _

_Zack tried his best to prevent their conversion into automatons, but the changes had already started due to the heavy courses of Mako injections. Given in small amounts Mako was absorbed and assimilated by the cells of the human body, but there was no scientific evidence on the effects of extremely large doses of Mako. It was never meant to be given in such large doses, but Hojo didn't care. That's what experiments were for, Hojo reasoned, and human experiments were the best kind because they provided the most valuable information._

_Zack and Cloud were given a fresh course of injections once every Monday, so their agony hit its peak at the beginning of the week. The raging fire of pain slowly died down to a smoldering fire by the end of the week, but by then it was time for another fresh round of Mako injections. Nights were always the worst part of any day because that's when they weren't distracted from the pain. As brutal as the physical endurance tests and strength training were, they were a welcome distraction on Mondays when the pain was at its worst. _

_The Mako festered in their bodies leaving them extremely sick and nauseous. Oftentimes the Mako bubbled up, manifesting in bloody vomit tinged a sick shade of green. A few hours after the Mako injections, the gnawing ache that started in their joints grew into an all consuming fire that burnt them from within. As the Mako coursed thick through their bodies they could almost feel their blood boiling. They were ravaged from the pain, their insides raw and bleeding._

_Zack grit his teeth and clenched his fists in an attempt to endure the agony. From his bed at night, Zack could hear the pained groans of his friend. Cloud rarely complained, but his shaking form and silent tears spoke for him. He was a quivering mess of spiky blonde hair and big blue eyes that stuck out from the blanket tucked tightly around him. His lips, a deathly shade of purple, were strained over his chattering teeth as he tried his best to suffer in silence. Zack had learned that sympathy only made it worse for his friend because Cloud didn't want sympathy, only an end to the pain, and that was one thing Zack couldn't give him. So Zack was forced to endure his friend's torture along with his own at night._

_Now that it was winter things had become worse, if that was even possible. Instead of cooling their seemingly overheated bodies, the cold night air exacerbated the pain. The fire flickered inside where the cool air couldn't reach the flames. In this manner, the opposing sensations coalesced to form an even more intense and tortuous pain. _

_For whatever the reason, the icy cold didn't have as much of an effect on Zack. It was uncomfortable for him, but it wasn't anything that he couldn't manage. However, Zack couldn't sleep while his friend lay in bed suffering just a few feet away. Between the burning, freezing, and Cloud's trembling, neither of them was getting much sleep._

_One Monday night in winter, Cloud lay in bed with his knees pulled up to his chest praying for slumber to come quick and take the pain away. The agony was almost unbearable for he was freezing on the outside while roasting on the inside. The torment he suffered escaped his lips in the form of soft little cries. Zack tried to sleep, but being callous wasn't his style, so he made his way over to his friend's cot. Zack climbed into bed with Cloud and wrapped himself around his friend's shaking form. Normally Cloud would have protested, and asked Zack something like, "What the hell do you think you're doing?" However, things were different now, and he felt too sick to say anything. Surprisingly, Cloud found it comforting to be so close to another human being. Not only did Zack prevent him from freezing, but the ability to take solace in Zack's warm nightly embrace reminded him that he wasn't a cold and calculating angel of death like Sephiroth, at least not yet._

_Every night since the first night that they slept together, Zack crawled into bed with his friend. Things worked out rather well for the duo, except for the occasional night that Zack had a hot and steamy dream about Aerith. Those nights were extremely awkward, and Cloud found himself crawling over to Zack's empty cot in the middle of the night. He'd rather freeze to death alone than suffer the indignation of being manhandled by his hot and horny friend. Zack eventually figured out the reason behind Cloud's sporadic absences in the morning, but Zack was a little embarrassed about it himself. A silent understanding existed between them about this matter. Cloud never offered to talk about it, and Zack never bothered to question him._

_As much as Cloud enjoyed his friend's company at night, he didn't realize that his initial acceptance of sleeping together had become an open invitation to share his cot EVERY night. Not only that, but Zack had taken the dominant position in their sleeping arrangement, which relegated Cloud to the 'girl' position. It was an insult to Cloud's pride as well as being a tad embarrassing. If that wasn't enough, the Shinra guards had cracked quite a few crude jokes in their presence. Over time, his doubts started to get the best of him, and he found himself questioning their nightly ritual. One night when he wasn't feeling so sick, Cloud decided to assert himself and question Zack about it._

_Zack was almost asleep when Cloud called out his name. "Zack?"_

_Speaking into the cot, Zack's voice was muffled as he asked, "Yeah Spike?"_

_Cloud's body tensed in anticipation of what he was going to ask next. He opened his mouth but he just couldn't seem to force the words out. With a sigh he mumbled, "Nevermind." _

_Zack was about to go back to sleep but he could feel the tension in Cloud's silence. Slightly disturbed that Cloud woke him up he groaned, "What is it Spike?"_

_Cloud said in a low voice that almost seemed like a whisper, "It's stupid. Just forget about it." The silence that followed seemed even more hesitant. "Just go back to sleep."_

_It was obvious that Cloud was trying to dodge further conversation, but now that Cloud had told Zack what to do it seemed more like a challenge. "C'mon Cloud, what's bothering you?"_

_With a barely noticeable shake of the head Cloud said in a plain manner, "It's nothing Zack. I don't want to talk about it."_

_In a gruff voice tinged with annoyance Zack said, "Well if it was something you REALLY didn't want to talk about, you never should have woken me up in the first place. I'm up now, so out with it."_

_Cloud knew that neither one of them was going to get any sleep if he didn't reveal his thoughts. He still found the words stuck in his throat, but he managed to awkwardly mumble, "Why am I always in the 'girl' position?"_

_Still groggy, it took Zack a little while to figure out that Cloud was referring to their unusual sleeping arrangement. Zack raised himself up on his elbow as he snorted fondly, "'Cause you're the little one."_

_Cloud rolled over onto his back and scowled, "I'm not little, and I'm not a girl Zack."_

_With a chuckle Zack said, "Well no shit. I know you're not a girl. That thing between your legs makes that kind of obvious. If it makes you feel any better I'm on the outside because you're always cold at night. I can't go to sleep while you're over here by yourself shaking like a leaf. This way both of us can get some sleep."_

_As Cloud contemplated the truthfulness of his friend's statement, Zack asked in annoyance, "Is that what you woke me up for?"_

"_Y-y-yeah. . ." Cloud responded slightly embarrassed._

"_You're a dumbass," Zack said playfully as he plopped back onto his side. "Now go back to sleep." _

_Cloud rolled back onto his side and Zack squeezed him with a one-armed hug._

"_Zack," Cloud said softly._

"_What now?" Zack asked, his voice distant as he started to fall asleep again._

"_I'm not little," Cloud said defensively_

_Rolling his eyes Zack quipped, "I must have forgotten. You're big and strong and you're going to save the world someday."_

"_You're an ass," Cloud responded dryly_

"_Well you my friend worry WAY too much. You're like my mom multiplied by ten," Zack said. "So can we go to sleep now?" _

_Cloud just let out a loud sigh in response, a subtle cue to let Zack know he was unhappy._

_Zack tried to lighten the mood by saying, "You know how much I need my sleep for those fun sadistic tests Hojo has planned for us tomorrow."_

"_Hmph, we wouldn't want to be bad specimens and underperform," Cloud said in a sharp and biting tone._

"_Now you're creepin' me out Spike," Zack said as he gave Cloud an affectionate punch. He closed his eyes once again and prepared to go back to sleep. His words garbled by a loud yawn, Zack said drowsily, "Goodnight Cloud."_

_This prompted Cloud to yawn, after which he said, "Goodnight Zack."_

_Zack fell asleep instantly of his own accord, while Cloud stayed up for a while worrying about what horrors the next day had in store. Tomorrow was Monday, which meant a fresh round of Mako injections. Hojo and his lackeys were going to force him into that dreaded chair and strap him down with titanium alloy restraints. With Cloud's newfound strength, regular metal wasn't strong enough to contain him anymore. Last time, he earned welts on both his ankles and wrists from bucking and writhing against the bondage because the searing green acid they pumped into him sent his body into involuntary spasms. _

_After the sharp pain from the injections had subsided, the gruesome all-consuming fire would start from within. That was the worst part of Mondays, the hours that followed the Mako injections. Some people on Gaia wished for more money, a better job, a spouse, or fame, but not Cloud. He spent most of his time wishing that the blissful darkness would sweep him off his feet and carry him into the unconscious realm where both Hojo and pain were forbidden. _

_All of these thoughts made it difficult to go to sleep. Even when he closed his eyes he was reminded of Mako because it had managed to leach into the darkness and tinge it a bright glowing green. Despite his incessant worries about the next day, he was eventually lulled into slumber by Zack's warm breath gusting on his neck, like a gentle wind on a warm summer day. _

~*~*~*~*~

The memory roused Zack from his semi-sleep state, and he wrapped one arm around Cloud and squeezed him tight.

"Goodnight Spike," he breathed affectionately into his friend's hair.

Zack heard a weak mumble coming from his friend that sounded very much like, "Goodnight Zack."

He wasn't sure if it was wishful thinking, or reality, but it comforted him all the same. He rested his head in Cloud's mess of golden spikes, and had a peaceful night's sleep for the first time in days.

~*~*~*~*~

**Disclaimer: **I own Lilleas, Conlin, and the rest of the kids. Everyone else is the property of Square Enix. This goes for all chapters. I think I forgot to put this in some of them.

**Author's Note:** I wanted to thank **Blue Jay** for helping me with the Clack flashback!!! She guided me, gave lots of important suggestions, and helped make Cloud more masculine and "Cloud-like." She's so awesome ^_^ So I apologize it took this long to reveal what would happen with the children. I talked with my sister about their fate a while ago and she was strongly insistent upon them starting their own colony in the wilderness. Even after I reminded her they were preteen city kids she was still insistent upon it. Lol, I couldn't do that because it sounded like a Lord of the Flies setup. Also, I didn't originally plan to keep Lilleas, but she grew on me and I thought she fit with the flow of the story so she'll be in the story for a little bit longer. If it didn't make sense, Cloud thought he was being drowned by kidnappers when Zack was trying to give him water. He has a very fragile psyche already, and he's slightly delirious from the pain and fever. If you didn't know ethanol = drinking alcohol (beer, wine, vodka, etc. For those that haven't played Crisis Core, Zack gets a call from Aerith while he's in Nibelheim on that fateful mission. It's cute because his face lights up as he talks to her. He tells her that he can't really talk at the moment, but that his mission is short and he'll be home soon. She sounds sad so he promises that he'll come see her when he gets back. It's the LAST time they ever speak. Oh my gosh, I cried SO hard. . . . Lol, my husband can testify ^_^' Unfortunately those Shinra bastards did keep Zack away from Aerith. . . so sad. . . I also realize the part with Aerith is a little OOC. She's not that depressed, but everyone has their sad moments. It's not like she mourns for Zack every day, but I bet there are a few days where she just gets really sad. Besides, after those happy dreams/memories Zack has of Aerith in this story, they needed a little more angst. I'm not sure if angsty Zerith is for you **Goopy Sentimentalist**, but there will be a happy Zerith flashback soon! For those that haven't played Crisis Core, there's a DMW memory where Zack asks Aerith if she could wear pink for him. Aerith is in a white dress in the beginning of Crisis Core. She laughs it off and calls him silly. Well, by the end of the game she's wearing a pink dress. It's like she was waiting for him and wanted to surprise him because she knew he wanted to see her in a pink dress. He never gets to see her in the pink dress! O_O So sad. . . Well, this was a fun chapter to write. I think I like writing sad things better. Lol, well it's just more dramatic I guess. I love listening to sad music too ^_^ That poem I used is actually a one-shot I wrote a while ago, but I liked it a lot so I figured that I would use it for this. Those that have read it already, I hope you don't mind reading it a second time :P Oh, and about Cloud getting manhandled by Zack, a guy friend of mine brought that up after he read the first few chapters. He said, "Wait, is Zack dreaming about his girlfriend while cuddling Cloud?! That could definitely lead to trouble." Lol, poor Cloud O_o

I realize I've been updating relatively quickly this past month or two because my school is still out. However, I'm a married full time pharmacy student in my early twenties, and my school starts up in late September, which is next week. I'm in my third year of pharmacy school (it's 4 years) and it's going to get pretty hectic this year. I'm also neurotic about my 4.0 GPA so updates will be significantly slower. Plus, ballet starts again in the fall along with my mom's Christmas production of, "The Nutcracker," so I will resume teaching ballet on the weekends. I may also undergo surgery for a cartilage tear in my hip that I got from ballet. I understand pain all too well ^_^' Anyway, updates may come slow at times, but I'm dedicated to finishing this story all the way to the end, and a little beyond. Well if you stick with me you'll see what I mean ;) I was updating about once a week, but after school starts I will be updating more like once every 2-3 weeks. Reviews will definitely help ^_^ Thanks! As a side note, if anyone is interested in American pharmacy schools you can give me a PM and I'll try to help you out and give you helpful advice. I'm actually chibibluepenguin on the "student doctor network forums," if anyone knows what that is. Sorry for the long Author's Note! Subsequent ones will be much shorter. You don't have to read it if you don't want to, although if you're read this far then you probably don't mind them. Lol XD


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Distant voices hovered above Zack like a thick fog, suffocating. It felt claustrophobic and gave him the sudden urge to run, but where? He was shrouded in darkness. The once muddled sounds increased in clarity as the darkness started to fade. Suddenly, a harsh bright light beckoned him to open his eyes.

"I think he's waking up," said one of the girls

"Good morning sleepyhead," a cheerful voice rang out.

As Zack's blurry vision came into focus, he was surprised to see a cluster of smiling faces right above him. His eyes darted from face to face as he took in his surroundings. Their faces seemed to swirl about him in a disorienting pattern as he sorted through the events of the past few days. Oh Gaia, Zack thought, these children weren't a dream.

"Come on, let's help him up."

The girls took hold of his hands and arms and helped him sit up. Zack pressed his palms into closed eyes, half-expecting the children to disappear when he reopened them.

"What are you doing?" one of the girls asked in curiosity.

When he opened his eyes the children were still there. Nope, Zack thought, this is definitely not a dream. The incessant chatter continued.

"You talk in your sleep," one of the girls informed him as though it were an important announcement.

"You must like that Aerith girl A LOT," another girl teased.

This generated a sheepish smile from Zack, which sent all the girls into giggles. Zack wasn't sure what he said or did in his sleep to demonstrate his love for Aerith, but he wasn't about to ask. Looking at the girls he said with a smile, "Yeah, she's my girlfriend back home."

"Hey, you never told us you had a girlfriend!" one of the girls piped up, she was slightly offended by the revelation.

With a chuckle Zack said, "Well, you girls never asked." After they settled down, he turned to them and asked, "Can one of you girls get the shirts hanging on the tree?"

Unlike the last time Zack asked them for a favor, the girls were in high spirits because they would soon be going home. They all ran over in an energetic cluster to retrieve Zack's belongings. In the meantime Zack nudged his friend. "How ya feeling buddy?"

Cloud let out a deep moan of pain, "Unnnnggghhh." He was still curled up in the same fetal position from the night before trying to conserve the little warmth he had left in his body. Zack had unknowingly rolled over during the night leaving Cloud to fend for himself in the winter chill. The situation was only made worse by the fact that Cloud hadn't eaten in a while, so his body was selfishly conserving energy by diverting it to vital organs instead of providing heat.

Zack pulled Cloud into his lap and wrapped his arms around him from behind. Leaning over, Zack pressed his cheek into his friend and whispered, "It's going to be okay. I'm not going to let you freeze." Cloud leaned into Zack's embrace and absorbed the warmth as it slowly penetrated through his cold exterior. Much to Zack's surprise, his friend's feverish heat had disappeared. Placing his forearm against Cloud's forehead he said with relief, "Hey Spike, I think your fever's gone down. I guess it was just another case of Mako withdrawal. You really scared me there for a while."

When the girls returned with their shirts, Zack placed them beside him for later use because he didn't want to let go of Cloud until he stopped shaking. It took a long time for Zack to transfer enough body heat to sufficiently warm up his friend. Then Zack gently set Cloud down and quickly changed into his sweater. He said with excitement, "Oh man, it's never felt this good to wear clothes. So girls, how do I look?"

Hushed whispers passed between them before one of them spoke out. With a saucy smile she teased, "We think you look better without your shirt."

Zack countered with a chuckle. "Come here," he said in a playful voice as he reached out and tried to tickle the girls. He almost caught the closest one, but she managed to slip away just in time. They all ran away screaming and laughing in delight.

Lilleas had been waiting patiently by Cloud, enjoying the merriment of the other children. Since she was nearby Zack said, "Hey Lilleas why don't you help me put on Angeals' shirt." She gave an eager head nod, though it was a little more enthusiastic then she had intended.

After dressing Cloud, Zack announced to the group, "It's almost noon now, so we better get moving." After double checking to make sure he had all of his stuff, Zack herded the children into the back of the truck. "Is everyone okay in there?"

Zack received a few subtle head nods in response. "Alright, just knock real loud on this enclosure if you need something. It might be a few hours because we don't have a compass so we're just driving until we find the highway. Does anyone have any questions?"

"So you don't know where we're going?" Conlin's annoying remark earned him a dirty look from the other children.

"Nope, and neither do you so why don't you sit down, shut up, and enjoy the ride," Zack said with a cocky smile. "I'm going to close this thing now and we're going to get going in about five minutes."

After shutting the enclosure, Zack lifted up his friend and said, "C'mon buddy, we're going for a ride." He directed Lilleas to sit in the middle so that Cloud could sit on the end, which was more supportive. There was another reason that Zack wanted Cloud to sit on the end though. Cloud often got motion-sickness so he needed easy access to an open window because Zack didn't feel like cleaning up another vomit spill anytime soon. Once Zack was assured that both Lilleas and Cloud were buckled in, he started the ignition. As he hit the gas, the engine roared, and the hulking vehicle lurched forward. "Oh yeah! We are movin' now!" The next thing he did was turn the heater on high and direct all of the air vents towards Cloud. "We'll get you warm buddy," Zack reassured his friend.

Keeping his eyes on the path ahead Zack asked Lilleas, "Can you pat Angeal on the knee for me and tell him we're on the road again."

"Ummm, he looks like he's asleep," she responded with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh c'mon, he won't mind," Zack said with fresh enthusiasm.

Lilleas did as she was told, and Cloud let out a low husky grunt in response.

"See Lilleas, he said he's excited."

"You sure that's what he said? It sounded more like 'Leave me alone I'm sleeping,'" she responded.

He dismissed her with his hand. "Well, Angeal's got his own language. Trust me, he's excited."

Lilleas just shrugged her shoulders and said, "I guess." She didn't understand how a sleepy grunt could be interpreted as excitement, but what she thought was gibberish was actually a means of communication between the pair. Cloud lived in his own world with a special language of grunts and mumbles. In Zack's travels to this foreign land, he eventually came to learn the native language of Cloud's secret world. Cloud really was excited, though it was for a different reason than Zack proposed. After freezing all night, he was happy to be surrounded by warmth.

Now that they were on the road there was a sort of peace that had washed over them, gently lapping at their troubled minds. Lilleas hated to ruin the moment by confronting Zack about his real name, but it had been nagging her ever since she found out, and she couldn't silence that inner voice for much longer. Mustering up her confidence, she turned to Zack and said, "Umm, Zack can I ask you a question?"

"Sure Lilleas, what's up," he asked in a plain voice. He hadn't made the connection yet that it was strange for Lilleas to call him by his name.

She just paused and stared at him, her wide open eyes trying to communicate the meaning of her question.

"What, do I have something on my face?" he asked as he pulled the rearview mirror down to check his face.

She just rolled her eyes at Zack's ignorance. "Well I was trying to be subtle about it, but that didn't work so I'll just tell you. I know your name's Zack."

"You do?" he asked with slight surprise. "Well, I just figured it'd be a matter of time," Zack lamented with a sigh.

"So what's Angeal's real name?"

Zack realized he might as well tell her because it was going to slip out at some point. He was pleased at the fact that he'd done such a good job with maintaining the whole charade. As far as he could remember, he hadn't revealed Cloud's name even once to Lilleas or the kids. Trying to convey the sincerity of the situation, Zack lowered his voice until it had a sharp edge to it, slicing through air as he delivered his statement. "Before I tell you his name, you have to promise me that you're not going to tell anyone. What's the highest form of a promise for you?"

Lilleas stared at him with a puzzled look on her face.

"That came out weird. I mean like if you really want someone to keep a promise, how would you do it?"

"Oh, a pinkie-swear," she said with an affirmative head nod.

After showing Zack how to do it, they crossed pinky fingers and kissed each other's fingers. Of course they couldn't do the kiss together because Zack was driving, but Lilleas assured him the promise was still just as sacred.

Glancing over at his friend he said, "His name's Cloud."

She said with pleasure, "That's a nice name. I think it fits him perfectly." As she pronounced his name for the first time she found that it rolled off her tongue with ease. She enjoyed saying his name and felt a certain joy knowing that she'd have the opportunity to call him by his real name now.

His voice darkened to a serious tone, which sounded more appropriate for prying a secret out of an enemy than talking to a young teenager. "Alright, now that you know his name I'll have to kill you if you tell anyone now."

Lilleas furrowed her eyebrows and flashed him a look of horror and confusion. "You're joking right?"

Zack let out a small chuckle, "Fooled ya, huh? Oh man, I just love saying that." He stopped laughing and became deathly austere. "Seriously though, you can't tell anyone."

"I won't," she promised.

After their tense discussion, it wasn't long before Zack rolled down the window and stuck his elbow out. The cool breeze that swept through the vehicle carried away the tension and replaced it fresh air. Zack suddenly felt lighter and was somewhat looking forward to a new day. Hopefully they'd hit town by nightfall and find someplace to stay for a few days while Cloud recovered.

They found something that looked like a trail after about an hour of driving. It was a wide dirt path that seemed to stretch on forever. The shrubbery, which had once grown in the path, had lost the will to live after being trampled on by so many people. Only the heartiest of weeds now dared to venture growing in the dirt path. Zack was hoping that the trail led to a highway, but since they were currently driving around aimlessly, following the trail would definitely be a better option.

The vehicle didn't go very fast, only about 10-20 mph in the forest terrain, so it took them about two hours until they spotted a sliver of light peeking through the trees. As the vehicle drew closer, the sliver of light expanded into a diamond and then into a vast expanse of light. Zack's breathing started to quicken as they approached the open clearing and came away from the comfort of shadows. Being hunted like an animal made him wary about wide open spaces where he could easily be spotted. Zack was a magnificent creature with the speed of a cheetah, ferocity of a lion, and the grace of a purebred stallion, but he felt no reason to taunt the predators searching for him.

It had been about a month since he and Cloud escaped from the Shinra mansion and except for the initial onslaught in Nibelheim, they'd avoided the Shinra troopers. Shinra couldn't afford to lose SOLDIERs so they sent the grunts from the regulation army out as cannon fodder. They were little more than pawns in a chess game to Shinra who strategized with the same skill as a young child playing chess.

Zack had learned to distance himself from death over his many years in SOLDIER, but every now and then it still got to him. The shocking realization that he was essentially a cold-blooded killer was just as sharp and painful as it had been when he was a teen. His mentor, Angeal, had taught him that there were ways to restore balance in the world, such as returning life to Gaia in the form of plants. It was Angeal's attempt to atone for his sins. Zack had enjoyed helping Angeal with his gardening, but only because he liked spending time with him. Gardening wasn't in Zack's heart so after Angeal's death he quickly lost interest. Instead, Zack became more fervent in his efforts to help people. Over time, Zack realized that his passion for helping others was his way of atonement.

At times Zack wondered if saving Cloud was meant to be his ultimate act of redemption. His desire to save Cloud wasn't driven by that thought, but it floated around in his mind nonetheless. The children reminded Zack of Cloud, utterly helpless and innocent, which factored into his initial decision to save them. He wouldn't be able to make peace with himself if he abandoned them in their time of greatest need. That wasn't the way a hero behaved. His only regret was that he couldn't help them more.

When he stopped the truck he could hear the children excitedly banging on the enclosure demanding to be let out. Lilleas and Cloud were asleep, but he had to attend to the children first. As he opened the enclosure the children bounded out with enthusiasm. After being cooped up in a cold metal enclosure for a few hours they were eager to get some fresh air.

"Alright, stay right here. I'm just going to go wake up Lilleas." He wanted to let Cloud rest as long as possible so he figured he would get the kids started on their way before he disturbed him. He thought about letting Lilleas sleep, but knew she'd regret it if she didn't say a final goodbye to the children. Gathering everyone together, he split the money up and gave them a warning to use it wisely. It was more than enough to buy them transportation home, a few meals, and lodging. He pulled out the maps in anticipation of plotting out a route for the children. The only problem was that he still had no idea where they were. Zack was hopeful that they would come across a sign along the trail, but as of yet they still hadn't found one.

"Lilleas, why don't you go down with some of the children to the shoulder of the highway and check for signs. Pay close attention to the names because we're going to need them to plot out a route," Zack ordered.

Lilleas gathered up some of the children and headed towards the highway. Zack watched them until they disappeared down the embankment, while the rest of the children were still bouncing around with nervous excitement. He would have gone inside the truck with Cloud, but he needed to keep an eye on the children. He headed over to the side of the truck, put his knees up and rested his head against the metal enclosure. His body still felt heavy with exhaustion, and his mind felt fuzzy like he was swimming in an ocean. It reminded him of Costa Del Sol and that was the last thing he remembered before being woken up by a large group of children.

Zack still hadn't gotten used to seeing a whole group of faces upon waking up. The children kept trying to shake him awake, so he stopped them by putting out a halting hand out and saying, "I'm awake now, I'm awake."

Now that she had his attention, Lilleas informed him that there was a town called Hillcrest about five miles from here, and another town called Fairton about ten miles beyond that. Zack figured that the children could go to the first village, and he, Lilleas, and Cloud would head to Fairton. As he pulled out the maps for the two villages he noticed they were both of moderate size. Normally Zack liked to stop in more remote towns, but he needed to get some medical supplies to fix up Cloud and he doubted that a rural village would have a pharmacy. With a pen he marked various exits off the highway, places to eat, and hotels. He instructed the children to find a hotel and use the phones in their rooms to call home. Then he reminded them to stay together as much as possible because children walking alone were prime targets of child predators. The children listened carefully as he gave them various other safety tips.

Before they left, Zack gave all of them a big hug, even the resistant ones like Conlin. The children thanked him again for his kindness and told him that they'd never forget him. Years later the children would grow up and eventually lose contact with one another, but they would never forget the bright-eyed ex-SOLDIER with the dark raven hair. As if chasing a shadow of the past, three of the four girls ended up marrying men with dark hair and blue eyes. It wasn't the same though, and they could never figure out why the magic wasn't there. No one would ever be able to match up to Zack, the hero of their childhood dreams and fantasies.

As the children departed, echoes of laughter trailed behind them, ringing within the forest walls. A strange hollow feeling rose within Zack as he watched them disappear out of sight. He could tell Lilleas felt it too because she had a hand clasped over her heart and a wistful look on her face. The children had made him temporarily forget that he was a fugitive on the run, and he almost felt normal for a short period of time. With their departure the festivities had ended and Zack was left to clean up the mess.

As Zack turned to retrieve Cloud from the car, Lillieas followed behind him. A semi-awake Cloud greeted him when he opened the door of the truck. Zack had been prepared to catch him in case he fell out, but he seemed to be sitting up on his own. "Alright kiddo, it's time to go."

Zack was met with resistance as he tried to lift Cloud out of the vehicle. Cloud laid his body out along the length of the seat, which distributed his weight in a manner that made it much more difficult to be carried out. Zack then reached over and firmly grabbed him around the legs and started to drag him out. This elicited a loud groan of protest from Cloud, "Nggggghhh."

Cloud dug his gloved fingers into the fabric of the seat in a futile attempt to stay in the truck. With a little chuckle Zack said, "You're being difficult lately." It didn't take long for Zack to realize Cloud wanted to stay in the truck because it was warm. The heater had been running the whole time, and Cloud didn't understand why he had to leave the warm place and go back into the cold. As Zack exerted more force so did Cloud. His fingernails eventually caved under the pressure and he let out a yelp of pain as a few of them bent backwards. It didn't take much for Zack to overpower Cloud, pull him out of the truck, and cradle him in his arms.

Zack heard Cloud's yelp of pain so he tenderly asked his friend, "What's wrong?" Cloud turned his face into Zack's chest to hide from him because he was mad. It was his only way of demonstrating anger given his fragile physical and mental condition. Zack leaned over close to Cloud and tried to coerce him out of hiding by saying, "C'mon Cloud, don't be like that. I'm really sorry if I hurt you." Cloud's head lifted up slightly, but it was only to listen better. Zack thought his apology was working so he continued on. "I know you're mad about the cold now, but we're going to be staying in a warm room tonight. You'll see. I'm not going to let you freeze." Cloud remained firm in his grudge and burrowed his head back into his friend's chest.

Zack's words of remorse did little to stave off the numbing cold that was starting to consume his hands. The leather gloves helped somewhat, but they couldn't compete with Cloud's total lack of body heat. It wouldn't be long before the chill worked its way into his core and Cloud hated being cold.

Cloud was able to wedge the hand closest to Zack in between their bodies, but the other arm hung limp beside him. Hoping to get Zack's attention, he started twitching his fingers and making needy little moans. As Zack looked down at his friend's desperate attempt to get his attention, it didn't take him long to realize what Cloud wanted. However, he had both arms full so he turned to Lilleas and asked, "Hey Lilleas, can you take Cloud's hand and tuck it beside him like the other hand?"

She came over to the pair and tucked Cloud's loose hand in between their bodies. As she stepped back, she smiled at the tender image of Zack sheltering his friend from the cold world that threatened to swallow him whole.

Zack spoke softly to his friend, but loud enough for Cloud to hear him with only one ear exposed. "I'm sorry Spike. I didn't realize you were so cold. Sometimes I forget how cold you get." Cloud turned his face slightly towards Zack and a ghost of a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. The smile was ever so slight, but Zack knew it meant that Cloud had accepted his apology. Zack returned the smile with a much bigger one of his own.

After they gathered up their things, they left the truck behind and walked through the forest towards their next destination, Fairton. It would have been more convenient to drive, but a large green off-road vehicle close to the freeway would have been too conspicuous. Fifteen miles wasn't a long distance, and Zack figured that if they walked 3-4 miles per hour they'd get there in about four hours.

They'd been walking for about an hour when Zack brought up the issue of closing up the gash in the back of Cloud's head. He'd been thinking about it for a while, but he still wasn't sure how he was going to go about doing it. From his own experience with stitches, he knew there was a special needle and thread used for the procedure. It's not likely that he was going to find those supplies, so he'd have to use a regular sewing needle and cotton thread. However, that method of closing the gash was reminiscent of mending an article of clothing. Zack grimaced because the image conjured up by that thought was a mixture of disturbing and wrong. Besides, even if he did have the correct equipment, he didn't think he was skilled enough to do it without major scarring from inadequate closure of the wound.

He explained the situation to Lilleas and asked her if she had any ideas. She thought about it for a few minutes before she came up with an answer. "Since we can't sew it up, how about we use something sticky?"

Furrowing his brows in concentration he mulled over the idea. "Something sticky, maybe some sort of glue. . . " His statement lingered in the air waiting for a more affirmative answer. Just as the idea popped into his head he said excitedly, "I've got it, superglue!"

"Superglue, do you really think it will work?" she asked in slight confusion.

Zack said, "Yeah, it actually does a good job of holding skin together. Let me tell you a story and then you'll understand. "

~*~*~*~*~

_Zack was sitting at his desk twirling the remnants of a broken earring and bemoaning the fact that he couldn't wear it anymore. Normally a broken earring wouldn't be anything to cry about, but this was Zack's 'Lucky Stud.' Its magic had enticed many girls into going out on a date with him. Sometimes the earring worked even better than expected, and he got REAL lucky after the date. _

_Before Zack met Aerith he was quite the ladies man. He was fifteen at the time, not yet a man, but a far cry from being a young boy. He was good looking and he knew it too, which added a flair of arrogance to his personality. In his opinion, there was nothing better than a fine piece of ass, and he was always on the chase. To him the world was a buffet of women and he needed to try all the different dishes and flavors. Anything with a shapely bottom and cleavage was fair game for Zack and his raging teenage hormones. _

_It certainly was a magic earring, and he was at a loss because he had a date tonight, a really hot date. As he was lamenting his fate, his roommate Kunsel came through the door. _

"_Hey Zack, what's up?" asked Kunsel_

"_Oh hey," Zack replied in a mildly dejected tone. _

_Kunsel immediately knew something was wrong because Zack always met him with a cheerful greeting. "What's wrong?"_

"_I broke my 'Lucky Stud' and I have a date tonight," Zack replied._

_Kunsel rolled his eyes and groaned, "Not that 'Lucky Stud' thing again."_

"_Hey, don't bash it, it really works," Zack said in a defensive tone._

_Narrowing his gaze Kunsel said in annoyance, "You don't think your luck with the ladies has anything to do with the fact that you're incredibly hot?"_

_Flashing Kunsel a cocky grin Zack said arrogantly, "I'm flattered that you think I'm fuckable, but you know you're not my type."_

_This elicited an even louder groan from Kunsel. "Oh Gaia, I can't believe I'm friends with you." He walked over to his desk and pulled out a small tube of super glue. Tossing it over to Zack he said, "Here, maybe this will get you to shut up."_

_Zack turned the little tube over in his hands and perked up when he saw it was superglue. "Hey thanks man! You're so awesome!"_

"_Yeah, yeah, don't mention it. I just can't stand to see you so unZack-like," Kunsel said with a half-smile. "Alright, I just came in here to pick up my bag. I'll see ya later."_

_Already occupied with the task of fixing his special earring, Zack yelled into his desk, "Bye Kunsel."_

_He pinched the earring back between his right thumb and left forefinger and put a generous dollop of glue on the earring back. Then he brought it together with the ball of the earring. Zack said aloud, "So I just hold this for about five seconds and then I can let it dry on my desk." Almost as soon as he brought the two broken parts of the earring together, he started to fantasize about his date for the night. _

_Before he knew it about a minute had passed. When he went to put the earring down, he realized it was stuck between his fingers, essentially meshing his right and left hand together in a tangled mess of fingers and an earring stud. "Shit," he mumbled. _

_Just then he heard someone rapping their knuckles on his door. That's when he remembered Angeal was supposed to pick him up at 3 PM for his afternoon training session. Not only did Zack glue his hands together, but he'd been so preoccupied with fixing his earring that he completely forgot to prepare for their afternoon lesson. "Angeal's going to kill me!" he blurted out. Getting antsy, he started to bounce from foot to foot trying to think of a place to hide. He needed to find a place fast! The bed looked like it would work so he shimmied himself under the closest bed. It was a tight fit, but he was sure Angeal would never find him there_

_Angeal said in a gruff voice, "Zack, open this door now." Nothing but silence followed so he tried again in an even louder voice. "Zackary, you better open this door now or I'm using my key."_

_Stay calm, Zack thought. If I just stay calm, he'll go away eventually. _

_With the metallic click of the doorknob, Angeal entered the room. Zack's heart skipped a beat as he saw Angeal's feet pass by him. _

_Much to Angeal's surprise, he looked around to find that the room was empty. Angeal was about to go look somewhere else when he heard a phone ring, but it wasn't exactly a ringing sound, it was a song instead. One that Zack had been annoying his mentor with for the past week. "That must be Zack's phone," Angeal growled. He walked over to the source of the sound, Zack's desk, and picked up the phone. _

_A sweet sounding feminine voice answered the phone. "Hi there hot stuff. Are you ready for our date tonight?"_

_In a menacing voice Angeal replied, "If by hot stuff you mean Zack, then he's not interested." He could hear the girl respond with a huff of anger. After hanging up the phone, Angeal said with slight disgust, "I think that's the third girl this month. No wonder that boy has trouble concentrating on his lessons." Then he announced, "I know you're in here Zack, and I canceled your date for tonight." He continued on in sarcasm, "I hope you don't mind, because I certainly don't mind playing hide-and-go-seek with you."_

_Zack couldn't help but curse himself inwardly, damn it! She would have been the fourth girl this month too if you wouldn't have interfered. _

_After searching the entire bathroom and almost every other hiding place he could think of, Angeal was starting to get frustrated. "Zack, come on out. The game's up," Angeal said, his voice worn out of patience._

_Not on your life old man, Zack thought. _

_Angeal got a new idea and started looking underneath all the beds. Zack tried to flatten himself as close to the wall as he could. It wasn't long before Zack heard a booming voice followed by a head turned sideways under the bed. "Found you Zack." If Angeal expected Zack to give up that easily, he was wrong. _

"_I'm staying here," Zack said stubbornly. _

_Angeal reached his arm underneath the bed in an attempt to grab some part of Zack to drag him out. However, Zack was far enough under the bed that Angeal couldn't get him. Zack breathed a sigh of relief as he saw his mentor leave, but that relief was short lived. Angeal removed himself from underneath the bed so that he could sit on top of it. If he couldn't pull Zack out he was going to squish him out. _

_Bouncing heavily on the bed, Angeal said with a wry smile, "Don't worry Zack, I can wait here all day."_

_This elicited a yelp from Zack as Angeal's weight pressed the springs from the underside of the mattress into him. It didn't take more than about three bounces for Zack to give up. "Alright, I'm coming out," Zack groaned. _

_As he crawled out from under the bed, he was met by a pair of stern green eyes glaring down at him. Angeal was waiting for him with brows furrowed and arms sternly crossed over his chest. "Come on, we're already running late for your training session," Angeal said in frustration. Grabbing Zack's arm, he started to drag a reluctant Zack out the door. That's when he noticed that Zack was moving very strangely today, almost like his hands were glued together. "What on Gaia is wrong with you today?"_

_Zack couldn't bring himself to tell his mentor that he had done something as stupid as glue his hands together, so instead he slowly offered his hands up to Angeal so that he could observe the problem for himself. _

"_Zack, did you glue your fingers together?" Angeal asked in utter bewilderment. _

_A slow nod was followed by a meek admission, "Yeah."_

_With a sigh of frustration, Angeal closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. He could only wonder what he did in another life to deserve this. _

_Motioning with his hand Angeal said, "Let me see your hands Zack."_

_Trusting his mentor completely, Zack offered his hands up once again to Angeal._

_As Angeal tried to pry his fingers apart, Zack howled with pain and quickly jerked his hands away. Zack's large puppy eyes and sad pout implored Angeal to keep his distance. _

_Shit, the sad puppy look, Angeal thought. "Hmmm, well there's got to be another way to get your fingers apart." Scratching his stubble laden chin, he suddenly came up with an idea, "Acetone." _

_Angeal whipped out his phone and started dialing Genesis' number. _

"_Angeal, what's. . ." Zack was cut off by Angeal who hushed him with his finger._

_Genesis lazily picked up the phone on the fifth ring. He always waited for the phone to ring a few times before he picked it up, but there one exception and that was Sephiroth. The General was the only individual that commanded the privilege of Genesis' immediate attention. _

"_Oh hi Genesis," Angeal said with a sigh of relief, "I'm glad I caught you."_

_On the other side, Genesis purred, "What seems to be the problem my friend?"_

"_Do you happen to have nail polish remover?"_

_An amused smirk made its way onto Genesis' graceful features. "Since when are you so worried about your appearance?"_

_This elicited a hearty chuckle from Angeal. "No, it's not for me, it's for Zack."_

"_Oh?" Genesis asked with hushed excitement. He couldn't wait to hear about the new predicament that Angeal's apprentice had gotten himself into. _

"_Not now Genesis, I'll tell you later."_

"_Alright," Genesis said with an eloquent sigh. "The nail polish remover is in my bathroom. I'm not home, but you can let yourself in."_

"_Thanks, you're a lifesaver," Angeal said._

"_Oh, one more thing Angeal, I don't want your puppy touching any of my stuff," Genesis warned in a dark tone. _

_Giving Zack a wary look Angeal said, "I'll have Zack on his best behavior."_

"_Farewell my dear friend, until we meet again," Genesis said in a smooth melodic voice._

"_Alright, I'll see you later." Angeal hung up the phone and turned his attention to Zack who was bouncing with impatience._

"_Come on Zack, we're going to Genesis' apartment on the upper level."_

_Zack eagerly followed his mentor because he was anxious to get his hands apart. _

_~*~*~*~*~_

_As they moved from the elevator towards Genesis' apartment, Sephiroth came rounding the corner. His moonlit hair cascaded behind him with gentle waves as he took powerful yet elegant strides towards the duo. _

_Zack thought, what is Sephiroth doing here?! He was hoping that no one would see him with his hands glued together like an idiot, but especially not the General! Within microseconds, his brain sent strong signals of anxiety to the rest of his body, and a flood of adrenaline rushed through him. Zack's heart started racing in his chest, and all of his muscles tensed up, even his toes curled in anxiety. He was thankful he'd recently gone to the bathroom or he might have accidentally emptied his bladder on the spot._

"_Good afternoon Angeal," said Sephiroth in a cool tone._

"_Same to you General," replied Angeal._

"_Good afternoon Zackary," the General nodded in his direction._

_As Zack looked up into the General's eyes, he could only hope they didn't reveal his feelings of shame and embarrassment. Zack tried to bring his hand up in a salute, but in his nervousness he had momentarily forgotten that his hands were glued together. Instead, both hands came up in a salute. His voice cracked as he tried to finish his greeting without looking completely ridiculous. "Good afternoon sir."_

_Zack lowered his two-hand salute, but Sephiroth had already noticed his odd behavior. With concern in his voice Sephiroth asked, "What's wrong with your hands SOLDIER?"_

_As if rehearsing a dance, Zack lifted his hands up in a servile manner to show the General. "I glued my fingers together," Zack admitted._

"_What's this shiny metal thing stuck in your mesh of fingers?" Sephiroth asked as though it were an order and not a question._

"_That's my 'Lucky Stud' sir."_

_Angeal just shook his head in embarrassment. Yep, he thought, Sephiroth and Genesis were NEVER going to let him live this down._

_Sephiroth mouthed the words as though they were a foreign language. "What's a 'Lucky Stud'?"_

_The embarrassment crept up into Zack's cheeks as he flushed bright pink. If it were any other officer Zack might have tried to pass off a lie, but this, well this was the General! There was something about the General's mere presence that demanded the truth. He just hoped it didn't come off as stupid as it sounded in his head. "When I wear my 'Lucky Stud,' it helps me get lucky with the ladies." Oh Gaia, Zack thought, that came out sounding MUCH stupider than it had in his head. _

_Angeal just rolled his eyes and looked away. It was like a train wreck, but he didn't want to watch the ensuing carnage. The corners of Sephiroth's thin lips turned upwards into an imperceptible smile. His voice was calm and steady, but the mischievous gleam in his eyes revealed his amusement. "Very well then Zackary, I hope it brings you more luck than this." Nodding to both Angeal and Zack, Sephiroth said, "Carry on then."_

"_Thank you sir," Zack nodded politely. What he really wanted to do was go find a corner and hide in it, but Angeal had a firm grip on his arm._

_They walked the rest of the short distance in a tense silence until they entered Genesis' apartment. Upon entering Zack was taken aback by the lavish and opulent furnishings. It was a breath of fresh air from the surrounding sterile environment of the main Shinra building. It harkened back to a time of the past, before Shinra's industrialism took over the world. In a way, it was a cry for help, Genesis' passive way of rebelling against the company, but no one knew that then. At the time people just thought Genesis had a passion for flamboyant furnishings. _

_Looking around the room Zack said in awe, "Whoa, this place is awesome."_

_Before Zack could get much further in his observations, Angeal pointed to the couch and commanded, "Sit." Like the obedient puppy he was, he went over to the couch and sat on his hindquarters. While Angeal went to fetch the acetone nail polish remover, Zack took in the wondrous sights of the room. A fine silk Wutainese rug laid under an ornate cherry oak coffee table. The sheen of the fabric shimmered in a way that made the dragon pattern slither when viewed from different angles. The couch was covered with lush crimson velvet, giving it a regal appearance. Across from the couch was a mother-of-pearl inlaid triptych. Zack figured Genesis must have also gotten that from Wutai because it depicted a scene of the Wutai dragon god Leviathan. Interestingly enough, in place of a TV was a large bookshelf filled with books. The entire top shelf was dedicated to LOVELESS, and its various analyses and interpretations. _

_His eyes turned back to the coffee table and noticed something that he had missed upon first glance, a large ebony bowl filled to the brim with beautiful purplish-blue apples. Zack was rather hungry, and those apples looked so juicy and plump, just waiting to be eaten. Surely, Genesis wouldn't notice the disappearance of one apple, Zack thought. Why would he leave them out for guests if he didn't want someone to take one? Using his hands as a unit, he scooped up an apple. Taking a bite, his teeth sank into the firm and crisp apple. As the chunk of apple made its way into his mouth, there was a flavor explosion of sweetness and tartness that mingled together perfectly. He quickly took another bite trying to savor the mouthful this time, but it was no use for this apple was much too delicious to savor. As soon as he had one bite, he impulsively had to have another, and another, in an effort to satiate his demanding taste buds. He only got about halfway through the apple when he heard Angeal cry, "Zack!" The expression of horror on Angeal's face reminded Zack of the time they were on a mission together and he almost got his head eaten off by a Behemoth. _

_Unsure of what danger would cause his mentor such a fright, Zack quickly scanned the room for any threats. _

_Walking towards him Angeal roughly exclaimed, "Zack, didn't I tell you not to touch anything?!"_

_Zack still didn't understand until he noticed his mentor staring at the half-eaten apple in his hand. Holding it up Zack asked in innocent confusion, "You mean this apple?"_

"_Yes! That's one of Genesis' specially imported Banoran apples." _

_Looking down at the floor in shame, like a puppy caught stealing scraps of food, Zack said submissively, "I'm sorry Angeal. I didn't mean to. Well I meant to eat the apple, but I wouldn't have if I knew it was so special to Genesis."_

_Angeal put his hand on his forehead and shook his head in resignation. He said with a sigh, "Well, let's just hope he doesn't count his apples, and if he does I'll cover for you."_

_In the most convincing voice Zack could manage he said, "You don't have to do that, I'll take the punishment."_

_Angeal crossed his arms over his chest in authority and gave Zack a half-smile. "That's nice, but you don't know Genesis like I do. He'll be much easier on me." Looking around the room Angeal asked, "You didn't touch anything else did you?"_

_Zack shook his head, "No."_

"_Good," Angeal scoffed, "Now come over to the kitchen so we can get your hands apart." Acetone could ruin fabric and furniture alike, and Angeal didn't want to take any unnecessary chances, especially with Zack. Genesis wasn't fond of Zack already, but if Zack permanently ruined some of his stuff there would definitely be hell to pay. _

_As Angeal poured the acetone into a bowl, Zack walked on over to the kitchen counter. "Hey Angeal, how did you know that acetone removes superglue?"_

_With a laugh Angeal said, "Let's just say you're not the only SOLDIER stupid enough to glue your fingers together." _

_Zack looked up into the face of his mentor to find that he was wearing a big grin. "You?!"_

"_Well, I was young and stupid like you once. Don't worry most of us grow out of it." Angeal forced a smirk as he finished the thought, "MOST of us."_

~*~*~*~*~

Lilleas had been carefully listening the whole time and was disappointed when he didn't finish the story with an explanation of what happened to the 'Lucky Stud.' She decided to just ask him about it. "So what happened to the 'Lucky Stud?'"

With a dreamy look he said, "I was wearing it the day I met the girl of my dreams so I guess it really was lucky."

"You mean the girl you were talking about in your sleep last night?"

A big grin crossed his face as he thought about the coincidence. "What do ya know? I guess Aerith really is the girl of my dreams."

"Do you still have it?"

The grin quickly faded as Zack thought about the last time he had seen his 'Lucky Stud,' it was before the Nibelheim incident. It was somewhere in his room before Shinra destroyed all evidence of his existence. He doubted that they had been kind enough to send everything back to his parents. It was the Turks that dealt with orders to 'take care of the situation,' so they would have been the ones responsible for cleaning out his room. He smirked at the humorous image of Reno and Rude boxing his stuff up like movers. Zack thought Kunsel might have gotten in there before Shinra, but he was doubtful because Shinra knew about his 'supposed death' long before Kunsel. It was a humbling thought to know that his existence on this planet was so ephemeral and could be erased so easily. He thought of all the meaningful memories in his room that were disposed of, his father's watch passed down through generations, his first SOLDIER medal, love notes from Aerith, pictures with friends, all of it destroyed.

Lilleas noticed that Zack had been quiet for a while, which was quite unlike him. She wanted to say something but his grim expression hinted at the fact that he wanted to be alone in his thoughts for a while.

His shoulders sagged under the burden of his brooding thoughts. Finally he spoke, the words sounding distant as they disappeared into the air. "No, I don't have it anymore. It's gone."

By the tone in his voice Lilleas deduced that he was referring to more than an earring. In a voice laced with sympathy she said, "Oh, I'm sorry."

He stared at the ground as he said in a soft voice, "Yeah, so am I."

They both walked on in silence with the sadness acting as a wall between them. Suddenly, a gust of wind swept through the air driving a flock of birds from the trees. Zack's desire for freedom embraced the birds as they took to the sky above. Watching them with fascination, it reminded him of his own plight. It was too easy to get bogged down by the depressing nature of his current situation. The whole thing was mind-numbing to Zack, and at times he felt like he was in a twisted science fiction horror story. Only in this story Zack had a say, and he decided that he wasn't going to die. He wasn't going to let his life unfold like the chapters of a book where his destiny had already been decided. Zack was going to write the story this time, and both he and Cloud were going to survive.

Looking down at his helpless friend, he realized there was too much at stake to falter in his thoughts, he had to stay focused. Snapping out of his trance, he tried to change the subject to something light-hearted. "Come to think of it, I was only a year older than you at the time of the superglue incident. I guess I was kind of immature."

Lilleas looked over at him and was surprised to find him smiling. It was a fake smile, but she knew that he was trying to switch back into his usual optimistic state so she played along. "Kind of? Are all guys like you?"

"Only the good ones," he said with a cheeky smile.

She rolled her eyes and gave him a little shove. Then she let out a teasing feminine groan and said, "Ugh, you're impossible."

Zack chuckled in response.

The rest of the walk was carried out in peace with Zack carrying the weight of most of the conversation. After a few hours of walking, Zack accompanied Lilleas down to the shoulder of the highway to see how far they were from Fairton. When they finally encountered a sign it said that it was four more miles to Fairton so they hiked back up the embankment into the forest. Zack pulled out his stopwatch and timed it so that they'd head back down in half an hour. He didn't want to spend unnecessary time out in the open, but at the same time he didn't want to miss the exit.

When it was time they headed back down to the shoulder of the highway. As they made their descent down the embankment they were assaulted with a pungent smell, and the smell only got stronger as they got closer to the highway. As a whole the smell was indescribable, but it had components of rotten eggs, garlic, and burnt rubber mixed in. It was so strong and putrid that it made their eyes water. Lilleas spotted a black lump off in the distance. Before Zack could stop her she had taken off running towards it.

"Wait up Lilleas. Don't touch it! It might have a disease!" he cried after her. He quickly caught up to her and followed her over to the dead skunk, it was a bloody mess. Someone must have scraped it off to the side of the road after it was run over. Its black fur was stained crimson and its entrails were hanging out. The flies had already started buzzing around the dead beast, claiming it in death.

Lilleas kneeled down by the creature, arms hanging limp by her side, and she let the sadness consume her.

Zack attempted to breathe through his mouth to avoid smelling the creature, which was a somewhat effective strategy. Cloud wrinkled his nose up in disgust and turned his head once again into Zack's chest. He couldn't understand why Zack pulled him out of the warm comfy place, brought him to a cold place and then a cold smelly place. Things only seemed to be going downhill. Cloud could only wonder what the hell his friend was thinking. Zack had come up with some bad ideas, but this was definitely one of his worst. His only solace was that the putrid smell was a good distraction from the pain.

"Are you okay Lilleas?" Zack asked in a concerned voice.

She looked up at him with watery sapphire eyes. She wanted comfort, but that was hard for Zack to give at the moment. He had both hands full with Cloud and the smell was nauseating. What Zack really wanted to do was get as far away as possible from the rotting corpse, but he knew that Lilleas was upset so he tried his best to soothe her. "I know you're upset Lilleas, but he's in the Lifestream now. He's probably happy playing with the other dead skunks."

Her lips formed a soft pout as she asked, "What if it's a mama skunk and the babies are motherless?"

Zack couldn't believe he was actually having this conversation. "It's not a mama skunk," Zack tried to say convincingly. He had no idea what gender the skunk really was, but he knew that if he wanted to get out of there fast he had better come up with a logical explanation. "He just looks like a guy skunk. He was probably coming home from a party with his skunk friends when he got hit. I'm sure it was really fast and he didn't feel much."

She looked up at him, her gaze full of hope, looking for affirmation. "You really think so?"

"Yep," Zack said confidently. "Now c'mon lets go. We're almost to Fairton."

"Wait, I want to say a prayer. It's the least we can do for him." She walked over to Cloud and clasped his hands in prayer while Zack bowed his head out of respect. As she stood beside them, she closed her eyes and muttered a silent prayer. With an elaborate sigh she concluded the prayer. "Alright, I'm done now. Thanks."

"Well I'm glad I could be of some help." He quickly changed the subject and continued on in a tone of excitement, "Look I can see the main exit sign from here Lilleas. We're almost there."

Nightfall was approaching as they marched off the freeway and into town. Step by step they moved closer towards the future and shed a layer of their troubled past in the process. They were focused on moving forward instead of looking back in regret.

~*~*~*~*~

**Author's Note:** Special thanks to my wonderful beta **Blue Jae** for helping me come up with the flashback on this chapter! She also helped with the characterization ^_^ I also wanted to thank **Alexis4 **for doing a final check on the flashback! That was so nice of you ^_^ The next flashback should be a Zerith one unless something radically changes while I'm writing. So Zack's never messed up by accidentally letting Cloud's real name slip? Lol, that's an inside joke for those of you that are reading this chapter by chapter and helping me fix my mistakes XD. Thanks so much! I had to make up some town names. If you look at the map of FF 7 you'll notice that Nibelheim and Gongaga are on the same continent, and it took Zack about 6-7 months to go from Nibelheim to Gongaga. There HAD to be other towns on that continent. Just like the villages in FF 7 only have about 10 houses to represent like 1,000 people, they can only create so many villages. I have assumed that FF 7 is similar to a real world, and has more than four cities on a continent. When it comes to the actual canon game story they will pass through the actual towns in the game. I was actually fairly sad when the children left. Not crying sad, but I didn't realize how attached I'd grown to them all. These characters are becoming too real. Lol. So they actually use something very much like superglue in surgeries called Dermabond. It's really not out of the question, and probably the best thing they could have done without seeing a doctor to stitch it up. About the flashback for this chapter, I love Zack, I really do, but I think he was a bit of an imp when he was younger. Too many people in fanfiction make Zack the perfect human being, and I don't think he was. Considering the fact that he was an extremely good looking child prodigy, I think he was a bit of arrogant until he grew up. I actually dated a 'ladies man' when I was in college. He was on the college swim team, very muscular, hot, popular, blonde, good looking, tall, charming, and nice. He was a lot like 15 year old Zack but he was 20. Needless to say our relationship didn't last long, but it seems a lot of really good looking guys are like that until they grow up. . . I'm assuming everyone knows who Genesis is right? He's a 1st Class SOLDIER with Angeal and Sephiroth. He's an antagonist in Crisis Core. He's a very feminine looking guy, even prettier than Cloud I would say. I kind of liked him actually, but he's quite demonized in fanfiction. SquareEnix did a pretty bad job handling his character too. They didn't have much time for his character so he came off as extremely sappy and annoying. I figured I should explain Lilleas' role in this story. For those that don't like her, she won't be around long, and for those that do like her she'll be around a bit longer. Her purpose in this story is actually to further serve the story of Zack and Cloud. There's certain discussions that can't happen unless you have a trusted third party member. I have two planned out in particular, one of them revealing a much darker side to the Zack/Cloud relationship. Lol, I hope you'll trust me on this. I'm not a fan of OC characters myself because they often distract from the main characters so I'm going to try not to do that much. Once again, thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate each one ^_^


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

On the outskirts of Fairton a sidewalk loomed before them, a grey pattern of worn concrete slabs cracked and splitting at the seams. The houses that lined the street were a mishmash of colors, painted in a drab pastel rainbow of yellows, greens, and blues. Many of them looked worse for the wear, their eaves caving under the pressures of old age. The chain link fences that once stood shiny and proud were now slumped over and rusted. A few of the houses had even left their laundry out to dry on clotheslines. The clothes hung shriveled and limp just like their dreams of long ago.

It was becoming dark outside as night was quickly coming upon them. The dark blue sky blanketed the town and allowed Zack to creep unseen through the shadows it provided. Zack had planned the trip so that they would hit town sometime in the middle of the night. He knew that he looked a bit too conspicuous carrying a full grown man in his arms like a baby. It wasn't the townspeople that he was worried about because he could care less what they thought of him, it was Shinra that he feared. He had to remind himself not to fall victim to the comfort of safety. Just because they hadn't seen Shinra for about a month didn't mean the company wasn't actively hunting then down.

Even though they had been deemed failed experiments, Zack had no doubt that Hojo would have another sick and devious purpose in mind for them. After spending four years of precious grant money and valuable time on his specimens, Hojo was hell-bent on finding them and dragging their asses back to the lab. The thought of spending even another minute with Hojo chilled Zack down to the bone. He shuddered as he thought about the grotesque ramifications of their disobedience.

Lilleas noticed Zack's odd behavior and asked in a worried voice, "Are you okay?"

"Me?" Zack asked as he kicked an empty glass bottle out of the way. "Uh, yeah it's just really cold outside," he said in a distant voice to cover up his true feelings.

"Oh, okay. . . " Her voice trailed off, an affirmation that she understood something dark was haunting him.

Zack looked down at Cloud and saw his friend's eyes glazed over in pain. They flickered In and out as Cloud tried to push himself back into the unconscious realm. It had been a full day since he had anything to drink and his joints ached with the pain of dehydration. Zack was hoping to get his hands on some pain medicine after they got settled somewhere so that Cloud could drink some water. If it came down to it, he'd have to pin his friend down and again and forcibly drown him with water. Zack was ready to do whatever was necessary to keep his friend alive, even if Cloud didn't agree.

It never got any easier for Zack to watch his friend flounder in pain. Cloud's silent screams pierced through the night and ripped open Zack's phantom wounds. Their souls bled together, their physical and mental anguish coursing through their hearts in a crimson river. Zack raised Cloud up high enough so that he could bend over and lay a kiss on his forehead. He was hoping a kiss would magically ease the pain, like it did when his own mother kissed his wounds as a child. It was the least he could do for his friend at the moment. In a soothing voice rich with strength he said, "Don't worry, I'm going to take care of you. I promise." Their eyes met in a tender glance before Cloud's eyes fluttered closed. The tension slowly eased out of his body as he opened up and let Zack share some of his pain.

Lilleas surveyed her surroundings and turned to look at Zack, eyes wide open with fear. Her voice was a little shaky as she said, "It's kind of spooky around here."

"Heh, it's not that bad, just stay close to me" Zack responded. He'd seen spooky in Hojo's dungeon and this was definitely not it.

"Do you think Cloud is scared?"

Zack let out a small chuckle, "Nah, he's got me here to protect him. He knows I won't let anything bad happen to him. Don't ya Spike?"

Cloud's eyes were closed, but he could still hear fragments of their conversation. He let out a weak mumble in response to Zack's question.

"See Lilleas, he knows he's safe with me," Zack affirmed with a smile.

The dilapidated sidewalk eventually led to the main part of town. The atmosphere was stagnant with the comfortable smell of the middle class. Fresh cut grass and the lingering smell of pot roast filled the air. This was a neighborhood brimming with middle-class families living middle-class lives and raising middle-class children having middle-class dreams. Zack could almost hear the faint sound of children laughing as they played games with each other. Their moms would call them in for dinner and the children would grumble as they were forced to part with friends and come inside. Zack was one of those children once, and as much as he longed to return to that blissful period of childhood, time was a river that only flowed in one direction, forward. So they pressed onward following the current that pushed them towards an uncertain future.

Walking further, they came across the business sector of town. Lilleas eyed the food shops hungrily because she hadn't eaten all day. Zack reminded her that Cloud wasn't feeling well and that they could get something to eat after they'd gotten to the motel. Lilleas wanted to point out that there might not be any food shops close to the motel, but she understood the severity of Cloud's condition so she kept her hunger to herself.

They passed by a few hotels along the way, but Zack pointed out that they couldn't stay at a nice hotel because that would require an ID. Even if Zack did have an ID, he certainly wasn't going to reveal his identity to strangers. So they continued their walk until they eventually ran into the rough part of town. It had once been the thriving hub of town, but had degraded in its old age. It had been taken over by gangsters and other unsavory characters that operated business in the dark of the night.

"Wrap your arm around my waist Lilleas, this isn't a good place for young girls," Zack ordered. "Let's not dilly-dally. We're going to walk fast through this area."

Lilleas did as she was told and wrapped an arm around his waist. It wasn't long before they encountered a disabled bum on the side of the street begging for money. Zack paid the man no attention, but Lilleas stopped and consequently pulled Zack along with her.

"Can we give him some money?" Lilleas asked looking up hopefully at Zack.

"No, he'll just use it to buy some drugs." Zack growled. "Now come on, let's go."

She continued pleading, "The sign says he's a war veteran. Maybe it's not his fault he's a bum."

"War veteran, huh?" Zack said in a bemused manner. He bent over to read the sign, "Wutai War veteran. Homeless and in need of food. Gods bless."

"So did you fight in the Wutai War?" Zack asked the bum.

"Yes sir, I was a Shinra infantryman fighting under the command of the great Sephiroth," he said with a smile. "If ya don't mind me askin', what's a SOLDIER like yourself doin' in a town like this so far from Midgar?"

"It's a confidential mission, I can't say," Zack replied looking down at the ground. He couldn't help but feel sorry for the man because he knew what it felt like to be screwed over by Shinra. "Lilleas, grab the food from my backpack."

"All of it?" she asked.

"Yeah, he needs it more than we do. We'll buy some tomorrow."

The bum reached out his hands and accepted the food with a grateful smile. He squinted at Zack as though he were trying to recall a memory and said, "You look kind of familiar."

Zack flashed a nervous smile. "I guess I just have a familiar looking face."

Shaking his finger at Zack the bum said, "No, that's not it. I've definitely seen you before."

Zack wanted to get out of there fast before the man figured it out. "Well, we better get going, but take care of yourself," Zack said with a curt nod.

"Gods bless!" the bum shouted after them.

As they were walking away Lilleas asked, "How did that guy know who you were?"

"Don't worry about it," Zack said bluntly. "It was a long time ago."

They walked in an awkward silence until Zack spotted a pink neon sign in the distance. It flashed the word, "OTEL." "Looks like that's our stop," he pointed out to Lilleas and Cloud.

"Huh? I don't see it," Lilleas replied. He nudged her shoulder so that she was angled towards the sign. "Oooo, now I see it. Why does it say 'OTEL?'' she asked.

"It's probably because the light burnt out and they were too cheap to replace it," Zack said with slight distaste. Turning to look at Cloud he asked with excitement, "Hey Spike, you ready to sleep on a real bed tonight?"

Cloud's head just lolled towards him and his blonde eyebrows furrowed deeper in pain. "Hang in there buddy, we're almost there," he said in a sympathetic tone.

~*~*~*~*~

As they approached the motel, they noticed it had seen finer days. The charm it used to hold as a quaint lodge of respite was lost when the town's bigger and fancier hotels moved in. None of them were complaining though, it was a big step up from sleeping on the cold hard ground. The whole building was one story tall with about sixty rooms. The lobby was set apart from the main building with a big sign above it so it wasn't hard to locate. They walked into the lobby to find an overweight middle-aged woman manning the desk. She was flipping through a gossip magazine when Zack drew her attention, "We'd like a room tonight."

While smacking a piece of gum she gave the odd trio a one-over. Her eyes lingered on Cloud in a lewd fashion as she undressed him with her eyes. This prompted Zack to clutch him tighter to his chest. "How many beds?" she asked.

"Uh, two," he replied.

She leered at the trio once again trying to determine their sleeping arrangement. "We only have one room with two beds left and it's a 'smoking' room. Do you still want it?"

"Yeah, that's fine," Zack said with a sigh.

Do you want the night rate or the hourly rate?" she asked with a wry smile.

Zack was uncomfortable about what she was implying. "Look lady, can you just do your job and give us the key?" Zack asked, his frustration starting to show.

"Boy, someone's in a hurry," she replied with a smirk. She asked for the payment and Zack handed it over in cash.

"Here, room 10," she said dropping the key into Lilleas' hand. "If you're staying the whole night check out is at noon."

Zack briskly walked out of the lobby towards their room. "Don't have too much fun," she called out after them. Lilleas was curious about why Zack was irritated, but she knew better than to bother him at the moment.

As they entered the room, the first thing that Zack noticed was the faded sea foam green walls. He couldn't help but grimace as he pushed back thoughts of Mako from surfacing. The green walls surrounded him. He could almost feel the green walls closing in around him, slamming into him, and drowning him. A large gasp escaped his lips as he felt himself struggle to breathe.

Lilleas put a hand on his back and asked, "Are you okay?"

Panting, he managed to admit with a grimace, "Yeah. . . I just really don't like the color of these walls."

His thoughts were interrupted as Cloud loudly coughed to rid himself of the smoke that forcibly filled his lungs. Looking down at his friend Zack said, "I'm sorry about that buddy. I know this room smells like an ashtray, but it was the only thing they had left." Walking towards the bed Zack asked Lilleas, "Can you pull back the covers?"

With a nod of understanding she went over to the closest bed and pulled down the covers, leaving only the sheets exposed.

Zack carefully set Cloud down on the bed and proceeded to remove his SOLDIER equipment, including his gloves and boots. Cloud didn't provide any resistance because he was tired and the bed felt soft underneath him. Zack threw his equipment down in an unceremonious heap beside the bed. "Alright, let's get you into bed buddy," Zack said to his friend. Rolling Cloud over on his side, Zack pulled the covers over him so that the only thing sticking out was Cloud's big blue eyes and his spiky-haired head. Then he kneeled beside the bed, sitting on his heels and facing Cloud. Resting his hands on his knees he leaned over close to Cloud, his warm breath caressing his friend as he spoke. "I'm going to go out and find you some pain medicine. I'll get you feeling better."

Cloud's lips parted and a faint murmur escaped, "Zaaaack." He reached out to the face in front of him because he wanted to feel his friend and make sure he wasn't a dream. His fingertips gently brushed over Zack's features like the bristles of a paintbrush caressing a developing piece of art. Using a language of the fingers, he was able to interpret the familiar lines, scars, and crevices as belonging to Zack. His fingers finally came to rest on pouted coral lips whereby Zack placed a gentle kiss on Cloud's fingers before cupping his friend's hand around his cheek. "It's me buddy, Zack." He then placed Cloud's hand back on the bed before he leaned over and ruffled his hair. A smile softly traced its way across Cloud's face. "I'll be back soon, so don't worry your spiky head about it," Zack reassured his friend playfully.

As Zack turned to leave he felt something stop him, almost like his pants got caught on the bed. As he turned around to free himself from the clutches of the bed, he saw Cloud's hand tightly gripping his pant leg.

"I don't think he wants you to leave," Lilleas said with a knowing smile.

Zack couldn't help but smile at the fact that his friend worried over him so. Once again, he kneeled by the bed to talk to Cloud. Running a hand through Cloud's soft blonde hair he said in a soothing whisper, "Didn't I tell you to relax? Everything is going to be okay." Cloud leaned his head into Zack's touch, an indication that he understood. "You're going to have to let me go if you want me to get some pain medicine. Don't you want to feel better?" Zack tried to convince his friend. Tilting his head to the side he said confidently, "I'll be back before you know it."

After reassuring Cloud that everything was going to be okay, he got up to leave. He took the remote from the side table and tossed it to Lilleas, who was beside Cloud on the bed. "Why don't you guys find something to watch? Maybe something funny to get your mind off of things."

He was almost out the door when Lilleas asked, "Where are you going? No store is open this late."

Avoiding her gaze he said flatly, "I'm going out. Where else am I supposed to get narcotic pain killers?"

Lilleas knew that Zack had a good point. From the little he had told her, she figured that they couldn't just walk into a doctor's office with Cloud and get a prescription for opiate pain killers. With a slight frown she said, "Well, be careful out there."

Zack rolled his eyes and said sarcastically, "Yes mother." He left with a wave saying, "I'll see you guys soon."

Before Zack walked away from the premises of the motel, he stuck a hand in his pocket to ensure that his wallet was secure. He'd learned a thing or two hanging out with Aerith around the slum market. Keeping his eyes open for danger, he proceeded on his midnight drug run. When he was on night patrol in Midgar he busted drug dealers, but now he was searching them out to buy drugs, at least he knew what to look out for.

Strolling down the isle of broken dreams, he eventually came upon a bar. After asking around, he was informed that there was a drug dealer named the 'Candy Man,' standing alone outside the building. Zack tried to look inconspicuous as he looked around for a stray loner on the outside of the building. It didn't take long for him to find the person that everyone was referring to. Trying to look casual he approached the man. He sidled up next to the lone man and copied his posture. Zack was the first one to speak. "Hey, are you the "Candy Man?'"

"That's right," the man snorted keeping his gaze focused on the ground. "They call me the 'Candy Man' cause my deals are sweet as candy." The man looked up and saw that Zack was a SOLDIER. "Hey, how do I know you ain't one of them SOLDIERs that's gonna bust me?" he asked, the distrust evident in his voice.

Zack saw that he needed to assert his authority if he wanted to get anything from this guy. Grabbing the man by the shirt, Zack pulled him up close and growled, "Listen man, I'm in need of a fix. Are you going to help me or not?"

"Whoa, whoa, easy there, I'll help you out." As Zack released him he stumbled back.

"Let's try this again," Zack said holding back his frustration behind clenched teeth, "Got any painkillers?"

"Hold on, let me talk to my friend." As the man entered the bar he shook his head and said, "Shit man, them opiate addicts are getting aggressive these days."

Zack leaned against the wall with clenched fists, biding his time until the drug dealer returned. The drug dealer came sauntering out of the bar and said, "So we got some oxycodone and hydrocodone. Take your pick."

Zack didn't really know the difference between the two, but if he admitted that then he'd lose his credibility. He was hoping that he could get a better deal on the drugs if he acted like he knew what he was talking about. "I'll take ten of each."

Turning around to face the wall, the drug dealer counted out ten of each. "Alright, that's 200 gil for each tablet of the oxycodone and 100 gil for each tablet of the hydrocodone. That comes to 3000 gil."

Shaking his head in disbelief Zack said, "Shit man, that's not a sweet deal. I'll just go somewhere else."

As Zack turned to walked away the drug dealer held up a hand in a halting motion. "Now don't just be leavin' yet. Let me go talk to my friend and see what I can do."

It wasn't long before the man came out again and said, "Alright, alright, I can give you a discount, but not because I like you. How about 150 for the oxycodone and 50 for the hydrocodone? That would come to 2000 gil."

"I don't know that's still sounds overpriced," Zack said with a wavering voice of uncertainty.

"What do you think this is a charity service? I got kids to feed. Either take it or leave it," the drug dealer said.

With a sigh of frustration Zack pulled out his wallet, took out the money, and roughly slammed into the drug dealer's hands. "Alright now let me have the pills."

The man handed over the pills, and told him that the blue ones were the oxycodone and the yellow ones were the hydrocodone. He didn't know much else about it. As Zack walked away he let out a breath that he didn't know he'd been holding. As much as he wanted to run back to the motel, he didn't want to draw unnecessary attention to himself. Not that having a 200 lb sword strapped to his back was noticeable.

Finally he made it back and opened up the door to their room. Once inside he could hear the faint hum of the television. Lilleas was reclined on the bed beside Cloud, who appeared to be in the same position Zack had left him in a few hours ago. "So what are you guys watching?" Zack asked as he plopped down on the bed beside them.

"'My Little Chocobo,'" Lilleas responded.

"Do you really feel the need to torture Cloud?" he asked with playful disbelief.

"It's not that bad," she said.

"Yes it is that bad, they're chocobos with pictures on their asses." Turning towards her he asked, "Can you hand me the remote?" It was more of a statement than an inquiry.

"Okay, but there's nothing else on," she scoffed as she handed him the remote.

"Lilleas, paid programming is better than this."

As he was flipping through the channels she asked hesitantly, "So, did you get the stuff?"

Staring at the TV he replied with a sigh, "Yeah, I got it. Now I just have to give it to Cloud."

The silence that lingered in the air was indicative of their tension. It was a while before Zack broke the silence, "I'm going to crush up the pill and put it in some water so he doesn't choke on it." Zack went into the bathroom and emerged with a clean cup to crush the pill in. Lilleas watched him as he placed a blue pill in the cup and crushed it with the butt of his pocket knife.

Speaking over his shoulder Zack said, "Lilleas, could you go find some sugar packets? They should be somewhere in this room by the tea bags."

She returned and handed him four sugar packets. "Here, this is all they had."

He took the sugar packets and dumped them on top of the crushed pill. Then he went into the bathroom to fill the cup up with some water. "Alright, Lilleas can you get the water bottle out of the backpack while I stir this up?"

"One step ahead of you," she said as she handed the water bottle to him with a small smile.

After carefully pouring the medicine mixture into the water bottle, he approached his friend. Turning to Lilleas he answered the question she didn't want to ask, "I think I can manage it myself this time. I can use the headboard of the bed to prop him up." He looked down at the ground before speaking once more. "You might want to go in the bathroom, you know, in case he gets upset."

With a nod of understanding she went into the bathroom.

Kneeling by the side of the bed, he brushed the hair out of his friend's face and said, "Hey Spike, are you awake?"

Cloud's eyes slowly opened in response. He struggled to keep his heavy eyelids open as Zack's soft voice lulled him into back slumber. "I have some stuff that's going to make you feel better. Do you think you can trust me this time?"

A sparkle of understanding crossed Cloud's eyes and he let out a sleepy mumble.

Zack interpreted this as a sign of agreement from Cloud, so he crawled into bed from the other side and put a pillow on his lap. Grabbing his friend under the arms he grunted, "Easy does it Spike." Cloud immediately sank into the soft pillow on Zack's lap and started to fall asleep again. Gently shaking his shoulders Zack said, "C'mon Spike, you can't fall asleep yet. We'll be done soon."

~*~*~*~*~

Cloud's eyes opened once again, but he slipped between this realm and the next as he waited for Zack to make him feel better. He couldn't remember why he was in such pain. Already he could feel the burning in his joints, the throbbing headache, and the ache in his throat. That's when he noticed the green, everywhere, surrounding him. It was lighter than usual, but it was definitely green. Something must be wrong with his eyes now. Those fuckers must have found him and stuffed him back in his crystal cage. He'd been a bad boy and gotten out. They'd make him pay for sure. Someone was holding him from behind, the arms were warm and strong, the smell was familiar, and the voice was soft, cheerful, and masculine. It was Zack! They must have gotten him too. Damn, he hoped at least one of them had escaped. He couldn't help but feel glad his friend was with him. Was he selfish? He was selfish. He was a selfish bastard that was going to get punished. Did he deserve it? Nobody deserved this. For the moment they were together, but a moment doesn't last forever. Being with Zack made things tolerable in this gods forsaken hellhole of a lab. He could feel his mouth opening, maybe he was screaming, it was hard to tell. He could feel the Mako filling his throat. It was cold and bitter like he remembered, and every bit as painful as he swallowed. The pain would stop soon because Zack said so. Zack said he was going to make him feel better, and he always kept his promises, always.

~*~*~*~*~

Putting the empty water bottle down, Zack positioned himself so that his head was propped up by the headboard of the bed with Cloud resting on his chest. Zack placed a kiss on the top of his friend's head while Cloud returned his affection by nuzzling him. "You did good Cloud," he said with a smile of pride. "Don't worry, you'll feel better soon. I'm not going to let you suffer."

He called out to Lilleas in the bathroom, "It's okay you can come out now."

She slowly peeked around the door and took hesitant steps until she saw that Cloud was calm and nestled on Zack's chest. She approached the bed and took the empty spot next to Cloud. "How's he doing?" she asked playing with a lock of his golden hair.

"I think he's doing okay now." With a trace of sadness in his face he looked down at his friend and said, "Gaia only knows what goes on in that head of yours." He tried to reach down to pull the blankets up over Cloud, but from his current position he couldn't manage it. "Hey Lilleas, can you. . . "

She cut him off before he could finish his sentence by pulling the blankets up. If it was even possible, Cloud seemed to relax even more into Zack as the blankets were pulled up over him. Zack picked the remote up from the nightstand said with a sigh of relief, "Alright, it's time to watch some TV." Stroking Cloud's upper arm Zack asked, "What do you want to watch Spike?"

Cloud let out a sleep husky mumble, "Mmmmmnnnnnn."

"What did he say?" Lilleas asked with interest.

"He said anything but that stupid 'My Little Chocobo,' show" Zack said with a cheeky grin.

"He did not," Lilleas huffed.

With an exasperated laugh Zack said, "I swear he did. I'm not making it up." Trying to keep a serious expression on his face he turned to her and said, "Why, do you think he really wanted to watch that?"

"Well, I guess not," she responded.

"See there ya go." Zack had already started flipping through the channels. "How about some naked ladies Cloud, would you like that?"

"Oh Gaia," Lilleas said rolling her eyes, "We're not watching that."

"I wasn't asking for your permission Lilleas," Zack responded with a wry smile. He paused a few seconds before allaying her fears. "Don't worry we'll wait till you're asleep."

"You're joking right?" she asked in mild disbelief.

"Maybe," he said with a chuckle, "but I wouldn't wake up in the middle of the night if I were you."

She just sighed and sank into her pillow. "So what are we doing tomorrow?"

"Well, Cloud's just going to chill here while we go out shopping. I'll look much less suspicious with a teenage girl. You're going to pretend to by my kid sister," Zack responded as he stopped on a random channel.

"You think he'll be okay?" she asked, the concern evident in her voice.

"Spike? I hope so," Zack said mirroring her tone. "We'll be quick about it. I'm more worried about him freaking out. He doesn't do well being alone for long periods of time."

They were silent for a while, listening to the TV drone on. Zack didn't recognize any of the shows because it had been about four years since he watched TV, so he just settled for some random sitcom. The noise was comforting, distracting even, pulling his mind away from unwanted thoughts.

The somnolent effects of the drug had taken root, and Cloud was fast asleep on Zack's chest. His hands were desperately clinging to Zack's sweater because he had fallen asleep under the premise that someone was going to tear his friend away from him. Zack could feel the rhythmic breathing of his friend as Cloud's chest moved against him in deep rolling breaths. Cloud's mouth was parted in slumber, the saliva flowing freely from his mouth and onto Zack's shirt.

"Look Lilleas," Zack whispered. "Cloud's drooling," he snickered.

"Awww, he's so cute," she squealed.

Reaching over to the nightstand, Zack grabbed a tissue and carefully dabbed the wetness off of his friend and himself. He went back to watching TV for a while when all of a sudden he heard a loud gurgle coming from Cloud's stomach. With a half-smile he said, "You're probably pretty hungry, huh Spike?"

Lilleas was half-asleep, her head on the pillow as she mumbled, "I'm hungry too."

Turning towards her he said, "You know what, I think there's a vending machine outside. Cloud will probably want something to eat tomorrow before we go shopping. I'll be right back." As he tried to roll Cloud off of him, he found that Cloud's grip on his shirt just got reflexively tighter. Trying another strategy, Zack gently plucked his friend's hands off of his shirt and stood up from the bed. Cloud was now on his back, hands empty at his side, whimpering at the loss of his friend.

Zack tucked him in and tried to appease his friend by saying, "Don't worry Spike, I'll be back soon. Don't you want something to eat?"

Cloud responded with a low groan.

"Alright, I'll be sure to get you something sweet," he said as he grabbed his backpack and started walking out the door. "Watch over him while I'm gone Lilleas."

Once he was outside, it didn't take him long to locate the vending machine. He ran towards it because he was worried about Cloud and wanted to get back to him as soon as possible. Inside the machine he found a veritable smorgasbord of junkfood. He hadn't eaten all day and his mouth watered at the sight of such succulent offerings. Knowing that Cloud liked sweet things, he punched in the numbers for a few cookies, packaged cupcakes, and honey-buns. After not eating for a few days he knew that Cloud was probably voraciously hungry. He was about to get a few more snacks when he heard a muffled scream, coming from the direction of their room.

"Cloud!" he screamed. Zack grabbed his bag and rushed over to their room. In his nervousness he couldn't think straight and he fumbled with the key as he opened the door. Once inside the room he found Cloud screaming and thrashing underneath a pillow Lilleas had pinned on top of him. "Lilleas, what the fuck are you doing to him?!" he yelled. He quickly made his way over to Cloud who was still in the throes of terror, but Lilleas had already dropped the pillow by then. Not waiting for an explanation, he scooped up his traumatized friend and sat in a nearby chair. Clutching his friend's head to his shoulder he said, "It's okay Cloud, I'm here now."

Lilleas' eyes had dropped to the ground. Her voice rose in an effort to be heard over his screams. "I didn't mean to, I panicked. Shortly after you left he started screaming, and I was scared someone would hear him. When I put my hand over his mouth he bit me, so I used the pillow instead." She looked up, her eyes brimming with tears as she said, "I'm sorry. . . " She didn't wait for a response as she ran into the bathroom and locked herself in.

Zack glanced up as he saw her run into the bathroom. He'd have to deal with her later, but for now he needed to calm down Cloud. He made gentle shushing noises to try and placate his screaming friend. Under the lulling effect of Zack's gentle voice, Cloud eventually calmed down and his screams weakened to whimpers. "What's the matter with you today Spike?" Zack asked in a concerned tone. Cloud just buried his face deeper into Zack. "I guess you don't want to talk about it, huh?" With a sigh he picked up his friend and said, "Why don't we try to go to bed again."

After setting Cloud down on the bed, he took off his own SOLDIER gear and crawled into bed beside his friend. Wrapping Cloud in a one-armed hug, Zack could feel the tension wracking Cloud's body. Trying to relax his friend, he started a one-sided conversation with Cloud; he talked while his friend listened. Cloud didn't have much to say, but his ears were always open, listening. Even if it was a monotonous conversation, Cloud much preferred the voice of Zack to the scary voices in his head. He had heard more about Zack's love life then he ever cared to know, and unfortunately it happened to be one of Zack's favorite topics. Zack rarely held back from Cloud and told him everything and anything he could think about. After spending many years in the close vicinity of his friend, Cloud probably knew more about Zack then he knew about himself. Cloud knew things such as Zack's favorite flavor of jam, strawberry, and Zack's favorite flower, lilies. Maybe someday he'd tease Zack about having a favorite flower, but he was too tired now and Zack was so warm. He pressed himself into Zack's larger frame and let out a sigh of contentment. He was safe and warm for now and that was enough for him.

"Goodnight Spike," he whispered into Cloud's hair. Much to his pleasant surprise Cloud didn't stir when he got up. Zack still had something he needed to take care of before he went to sleep.

Knocking on the bathroom door Zack said, "Why don't you come out now? Everything's okay."

Her voice came out harsh and stubborn, even through the thickness of the door. "No."

"What if I have to take a piss?" he demanded.

"Piss outside," she hissed back.

"You'll have to come out sometime," he sharply insisted.

"Why?"

"Don't you have to eat?" he asked in a matter of fact voice.

Silence followed

"I have some treats out here. Aren't you hungry?"

An even more hesitant silence followed. He thought she was going to come out but instead she blurted out, "He hates me now!"

"Cloud? No he doesn't hate you. He might be scared of you, but he doesn't hate you."

Silence again.

"Okay, maybe that wasn't the right thing to say. . ." his voice trailed off as he thought of something to say that might appease her. "He'll get over it. I mean what you did wasn't right, but you didn't know." His voice was laced with melancholy as he continued on, "He's had a lot of bad things happen to him and sometimes he lives out his dreams or memories from the past. Why don't you come out and apologize to him."

Zack could hear the slow metallic sound of the doorknob being opened. She slowly peeked her head out, her eyes were red and puffy from crying. Emerging from her sanctuary, she came out and followed Zack over to the bed where Cloud was sleeping. Running a hand through his hair she sniffled, "I'm sorry Cloud." Looking up towards Zack she asked, "Can he hear me? He's asleep."

He responded with a half-smile, "You'd be surprised at what he picks up in his sleep." Putting a hand on her back he said, "Why don't you go to sleep. He'll still be here tomorrow and you can apologize again to him if you want." He motioned her over to the empty bed and said, "I'm going to go take a shower, but if anything happens to Cloud you come tell me, okay?"

"Okay," she agreed.

"I'll keep the bathroom unlocked so if you need to tell me anything just cover your eyes and come in."

"Goodnight," she mumbled as she turned her head into the pillow.

"Goodnight Lilleas," he said with a small smile. "Get some rest."

He was just about to enter the bathroom when he heard the phone ring. Who could that be, Zack thought with alarm, did someone know where they were?

~*~*~*~*~

**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of these characters except for Lilleas, and I don't intend to make any money off of this.

**Author's Note:** So I think I've come to realize that most people reading this either really like Clack, or really like Cloud. I must admit I'm a big Zack fan, but I doubt that most of you reading this are. There are actually a lot of you reading this that have never said anything, but I'm guessing none of you are big Zack fans. That's right I can see you, all of you O_O Lol. Anyway, I will try and fit as much of Cloud in this story as I can, but it is difficult with him being unresponsive for the most part. I thought about having Zack rob a pharmacy, but my mom suggested that wasn't a good idea for a future pharmacist to be promoting pharmacy theft in a story. So instead I'm talking about contraband drug deals. The FDA would be so proud XD I honestly don't know anything about illegal drug deals so if anyone wants to give me some advice on that part of the story, let me know. Also, any medical stuff I mention in here shouldn't be taken as advice. I wouldn't recommend applying superglue to a bad gash. Oh, the way that Zack gave Cloud the pills is the way you give it to babies. Some pills like thyroid medicine can't be bought in liquid form. Only with babies you put it in a small amount of milk so they drink the whole thing. Did anyone get the "My Little Pony" reference? It was a hit cartoon in the 80's. Yep, I'm that old _ Did internationals have that show? I know England had something called, "My Little Pony Tales." I was so obsessed with ponies as a little kid and unicorns ;) I still collect them actually ^_^ Thank you to all of those who have taken the time to review! It keeps me motivated to write ^_^

Hi **iwalkinthelight**! I wanted to answer your questions, but I couldn't reply to you :P Anyway, Cloud is very childish in his semi-comatose state. He is 100% dependent on Zack, like a toddler or an infant is on their parents. His ways of demonstrating emotion are limited, just like that of an infant or toddler. He's got the mind of a grown man though so things are going to be a bit different. In this story he's not AC Cloud, Crisis Core Cloud, or post-AC Cloud, he's semi-comatose Cloud with intermittent psychosis. As far as infection goes with respect to Cloud, he does have Jenova cells and extremely high levels of Mako so his body is more resistant than most to infection. I'll explain that in the next chapter, and Zack will be using a disinfectant and a local anesthetic as well, just for good measure ^_^


	13. Chapter 13

**Warning:** I changed the rating from T to M because there will be a few scenes in this complete story that border on M. I don't plan on many though. I'm trying to keep this appropriate for teens for the most part. I plan on rating each subsequent chapter, and if I give it an M rating I will specify the situation that makes the Chapter M so that you can avoid it if you want to. There is a heavy make-out scene in the flashback of this chapter, which is slightly explicit, but the two characters involved DO keep their clothes on. Actually it's not as bad as many of the M scenes I've read, but it's still what I would consider explicit enough to be above a T rating. I think it's what they call a "lime," not quite as sour as a "lemon." I don't like that term though because it sounds like I threw it in there for good ol' smut's sake, which I didn't. It also gives citrus a bad name. . . so my mom says. Oh another note, a dream within a flashback will be un-italicized. If that's too confusing let me know.

**Rating M:** Sexual situations in the flashback. Explicit make-out scene with clothes on.

**Chapter 13**

The phone rang again with a sharp trill, taunting them to pick it up. Lilleas paled with alarm and looked over at Zack, waiting for a signal of what to do next. Zack quickly thought through the possibilities. If it was someone associated with Shinra, it wouldn't be a big deal if Lilleas answered it. Then again, Cloud was screaming earlier in the night, so it might be related to that issue. If they didn't pick up the phone the hotel might send over some cops to investigate, which he definitely didn't want. The third ring came even louder than the second, urging Zack to make a sudden move. He gave a series of hurried nods and hastily told Lilleas, "Pick it up."

While her hand darted out to pick up the phone, her eyes betrayed her confidence. Taking a deep breath, she tried to sound as calm as possible as she answered the phone. "Hello. May I ask who this is please?"

Zack was kneeling next to Lilleas in an effort to eavesdrop on the conversation.

Lilleas made sure to enunciate each word and syllable so that Zack knew what was happening on the other side of the phone, "Oh, so this is the front desk calling about some very loud screams. You say they came from this room."

Zack backed off with a sigh of relief when he realized the phone call didn't have anything to do with Shinra.

Lilleas said in a plain voice that lacked inflection, "I'm sorry. I was having a really bad nightmare. My friend woke me up and told me I was screaming bloody-murder." Zack could see that Lilleas wasn't very good at lying. She continued, "Yes, I won't do it again. Okay I understand that we'll get kicked out next time." She hung up the phone with a languishing sigh, she was glad the whole thing was over.

At the very worst they would get kicked out, Zack thought, but they'd probably be able to find another motel. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. The seafoam green walls were making him a tad nauseated, and he could only imagine the horrible effects of the wall on his poor hallucinating friend.

Zack could see that Lilleas was still tense about the phone call. He hadn't explained much to her, only that they were running away from a very dangerous group who wouldn't hesitate to kill her. With a half-smile he said, "Don't worry about it Lilleas. Everything's okay for now." He didn't have much energy at the moment or he would have tried a little harder to comfort her. Looking over at Cloud he said, "Remember what I told you about Cloud, come get me if he freaks out again."

She gave a slow nod of confirmation and watched him disappear into the bathroom. She waited until she heard the shower water turn on. Then she crept over to Cloud's bed and crawled in with him. He was lying on his side, so she came up behind him and nuzzled the back of his neck. "Goodnight Cloud," she whispered.

~*~*~*~*~

It had been a long time since he'd had an actual shower. He'd dreamed about it for years now, that comforting stream of hot water lapping his body, washing away the pain along with the dirt and grime. Here it was in all of its anticlimactic glory, a cheap fiberglass tub rimmed with mineral stain deposits and a cheap silver shower-head to complete the look. It looked a bit different in his dreams, but as long as it had hot water it was good enough.

Quickly shedding his clothes, he left them in a heap before stepping into the shower. The warm water felt like a tender embrace, and his body reflexively relaxed under its spell. Grabbing the bar of soap, he got it wet before gliding it over taut muscles and corded tendons. With amusement, he watched as the layers of grime and dirt washed away, uncovering a new layer of skin in the process, one that had yet to be exposed to the harsh environment. This might be the start of something new he thought, a renewed chance at life for both him and Cloud, one they both deserved.

Grabbing the little bottle of shampoo, he applied a large dollop to his hair and began to massage it through his hair. It smelled sweet, like a field of blooming flowers in the spring. The pleasant smell conjured up a faded memory, which fluttered through his mind like the petals of a cherry blossom tree falling through the sky. Flowers, he fondly reminisced, Aerith. . .

~*~*~*~*~

_Zack had finally done the impossible. He had managed to sweet-talk the General into letting him have the afternoon off, or at least that's how Zack saw it. In exchange for the afternoon off, he had agreed to stay late for the next few days to help the General with his paperwork. However, Sephiroth never disclosed the full details of their agreement, including how much paperwork there was to get done. Zack had unknowingly traded five hours of time off in exchange for about fifteen hours of extra paperwork. It wouldn't be until tomorrow that Zack realized he had been duped, but for now he was cheerful as he thought of the bright prospects that afternoon had in store._

_He called up Aerith with the good news, and she rushed over to meet him at the church. With his Mako-enhanced speed he had managed to beat her and was waiting inside the church with open arms. After a more than amiable greeting, they settled in under the golden light of the sun that poured in through the church. Zack was lying on his back with Aerith resting on his chest. Zack talked about his day while Aerith interjected comments every now and then. After she'd been silent for about five minutes, Zack looked down to find her asleep. He watched the slow rise and fall of her chest with fascination. Almost everything about the pretty flower girl drove him over the edge of excitement, and he never felt more alive than when he was with her. She was the first thing he thought about in the morning, and the last thing he thought about before going to sleep. On the nights that he had an arousing dream, "Aerith" was the name that shattered the midnight silence._

_For the first time in his life he was in love, and the only thing he was surer about in life was that he wanted to be a hero. Now he had her wrapped up in his arms, safe from the rest of the world that threatened to harm her. She was his, damn it, and he wasn't going to let anyone else lay a finger on her. That was his last thought before fading off into the dark abyss of sleep._

_Basking in the warmth of the afternoon, they slept with limbs intertwined in affection. About an hour later, Aerith started to wake up. As she slowly lifted her head up from Zack's chest, she noticed that he was still asleep, his face peaceful in slumber. Resisting the temptation to wake him up, she pulled back from his arms to gaze at the beautiful man beside her. His body glistened a rich shade of beige under the illumination of the mid-day sun. Amidst golden tan skin, his full lips appeared a soft coral and were slightly parted like that of an innocent child. His muscles were sharp and defined, dynamic in movement, but lax in slumber as he lay totally unaware of his surroundings._

_With eyes closed in slumber, he looked gentle as a puppy, the kind of animal that enjoyed activities such as chasing its tail and running to catch a ball. Aerith noticed that even when he was awake, he still looked much like a puppy and acted like one too. With his boundless energy, he enjoyed plastering her with kisses and running around the park. At times, he reminded her so much of a puppy that she could almost imagine him wagging a tail._

_Yet there was another side to Zack that scared her, his SOLDIER side. To her he was Zack 'the puppy,' but to Shinra's army he was Lieutenant Zack Fair, SOLDIER 1st Class. In combat he was ruthless, capable of felling monsters and humans alike without batting an eye in regret. She was in love with a SOLDIER, someone who had slaughtered, butchered, maimed, and killed many of Gaia's children. Their only crime being that they lived on the wrong side, the non-Shinra side. Killing was only part of his profession she had reminded herself, an obligation to SOLDIER. She couldn't fully convince herself of his blamelessness though because his eyes betrayed his innocent puppy façade. No puppy Aerith ever knew had glowing blue eyes that flared with the intensity of death and fire._

_Her fears often manifested at night when she was caught off guard and unaware. She had a dream last night, perhaps a vision of sorts. Zack's eyes burnt feral as he emerged from the ruins of a city burnt and torched to the ground. Covered and dripping with blood, he dropped to his knees and screamed the anguished cry of a thousand tormented souls. Then he turned to look at her, blue eyes pleading in desperation for her to run away, far away and as fast as she could. She didn't run though, instead she walked slow and steady towards him, never dropping his gaze. After closing the distance between them, she dropped down to her knees beside him. He threw his arms around her waist with a fierce intensity of longing, as though he was about to leave her forever. He buried his face in her shoulder and shuddered against her. She whispered words of love and affection as he cried about failed dreams and lost honor._

_Perhaps it didn't mean anything, but she couldn't shake the feeling that something bad was going to happen to Zack. The planet spoke to her in many different ways with dreams being an important means of communication, but sometimes a dream was just a dream; nothing more than a bunch of random thoughts thrown together. At times it was hard to tell the difference between an omen and a dream, but there was something too real about this one. When she woke her heart was still felt heavy, as though her sorrow had somehow transcended the dream world._

_She thought about warning Zack to be careful, but if she didn't say anything maybe the thought would just go away. Perhaps she was making a big deal out of nothing. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't stop the feeling of dread from rising up in her throat, urging her to warn her beloved of an unknown impending peril. Maybe she would say something to him, not now, but later. He had rearranged his schedule so that he had the rest of the afternoon off, and she didn't want to spoil it._

_Propping herself up on her elbow, she ran a hand through his dark raven spikes. "You're so beautiful when you're sleeping," she said softly, "and quiet too," she added with a whisper of a laugh._

_Zack pressed his head up into her hand with a contented sigh. That voice, Zack thought, so beautiful and light, like the melody of wind chimes dancing in the wind. His heavy-lidded eyes slowly opened as he took in his surroundings. As he fully opened them the fuzziness started to disappear, and he immediately recognized Aerith._

_"I was wondering when you'd wake up sleepyhead," she said with an angelic smile._

_The opportunity was too perfect for him to pass up, so he flashed a smile as he turned over to face her. His voice was still heavy with the aftereffects of sleep as he said, "Did I die and go to heaven because I think I'm seeing an angel."_

_"Oh Zack," she giggled, "didn't you use that line on me the other day?"_

_His smile became even more indulgent as he looked into her eyes and said, "Maybe, but I can't help if it's true."_

_"You're so sweet," she inclined her head and gave him a scrutinizing look. "Well, a bit corny, but definitely sweet." She leaned over and gently brushed her lips against his before pulling back. A tease every now and then was fun._

_"What, is that all I get for being the most awesome boyfriend?" he said in a comically pompous voice._

_"Well, for being the most AWESOMEST boyfriend on the planet I guess you deserve something a little more." Leaning over once again, she pressed her lips onto his, but before she knew what was going on he rolled her over on her back. His arms were extended on both sides of her face, and he was kneeling, straddled over her._

_"Zack," she laughed, "what are you doing?"_

_"I'm not sure," he said with a slight laugh. It was more a release of tension than anything else. "Gaia, you're so beautiful Aerith," he said in a deep husky voice of desire. His deep blue eyes captured her green ones in passionate glance before he bent down to take her lips in a kiss. She closed her eyes and slightly lifted her head up in anticipation, but at the last second he pressed a quick kiss to her forehead._

_"Tease," she smirked._

_"Oh, so you want more of where that came from?" he asked playfully. Before she had a chance to ask what he meant, he pelted her with light kisses all over her face._

_She closed her eyes and brought her hands over her face to block the affectionate assault, but she was no match for his SOLDIER prowess. She had trouble getting the words out between giggles. "Zack, stop it. Please?"_

_He drew back and said with a sarcastic undertone, "Well, since you asked so nicely I guess I will, but you might not be so lucky next time."_

_After sitting down beside her, he helped pull her up into a sitting position whereby she nestled down beside him. "So, what do you want to do today?" Zack asked._

_"Hmmm," she hummed in concentration. "How about we go see a movie?"_

_"Yeah, sure. Anything you want to see in particular?" Zack asked. He crossed one set of fingers behind his back hoping that she didn't want to see anything with princesses in it._

_"Well, there's that 'Little Mermaid' movie that just came out. I've been really looking forward to seeing it," she said with a dash of hope._

_He bit the inside of his cheek to prevent himself from blurting out something he'd regret later. He threw his head forward in resignation as he said, "I don't know Aerith, there are going to be a lot of little kids there. Besides, what if any of the guys are there?"_

_"Since when have you cared what others thought about you?" she asked_

_"Since the day my girlfriend asked me to go to another animated princess movie," he said with a cheeky smile._

_She gave him a slight shove, "You're horrible." He could only chuckle as he watched her fight against the smile creeping up on her lips. "Well, how about I make it worth your while," she purred in a soft demure voice._

_"Oh yeah," Zack said with sudden renewed interest and a beaming smile. "What did you have in mind?"_

_Clasping her hands together she said with a smile, "I'll make you dinner again. You seemed to really like it last time. I've improved too, and I want to show you my new skills."_

_More like use me as a test subject, Zack thought grimly. Zack shifted uncomfortably and his eyes darted around avoiding her gaze. "Uh, well that's not exactly what I was thinking of, but sure dinner sounds great." He could only hope she didn't cook that same crunchy rice and dry chicken slop that she did last time._

_She gently batted her lashes and gave an innocent pout as she looked at him with hopeful eyes._

_"Alright, you win," he said with a small chuckle. "The 'Little Mermaid' it is."_

_"Yaaaay," she squealed with delight. She pounced on him and threw her arms around his neck. Her eyes shined with affection as she gave him a big smile of gratitude. "Thanks."_

_THAT was what he was waiting for. Somehow her smile made anything worth the trouble it had caused him. He would have to remember that when he was in the movie theater watching a princess movie and wondering how she had talked him into it, AGAIN. Amusement mixed with the desire in his voice as he said, "You're just lucky you're so cute."_

_As he leaned in to kiss her, he could feel her warm breath on his face, it smelled sweet like honey. Capturing her lips with his, he gently opened her mouth with his tongue. He explored the hot wet expanse of her mouth before she opened up for an even deeper kiss. He gently lapped at her tongue in a slow rhythm before pushing himself deep within her mouth. This elicited a moan of pleasure from Aerith as she felt her body tingle with pleasure. Pulling back, he nipped her bottom lip before letting go. With foreheads pressed together, Zack placed his hands on her flushed cheeks. His words came out thick with desire and affection as he said, "Aerith, I love you so much."_

_Echoing his sentiments she whispered back, "I love you too Zack." She grabbed hold of one of his wrists and led his hand down to her breast. Her voice came out a little awkward as she looked up at him and said, "I want you to touch me." It wasn't something that she said often, or ever for that matter. However, Zack was too lost in the moment to notice her embarrassment. He pressed a kiss to her forehead before gently laying her down on the ground. Tugging at his shirt, he quickly pulled it off and folded it up so that it resembled a pillow. Lifting up her head, he put the folded up shirt underneath her. "Here, that should be more comfortable."_

_"You sure you didn't just want to show me your muscled chest?" she said with a teasing smile._

_"Maybe. Why do you like it?" he asked, releasing a laugh that was a bit more nervous than intended. He lay down next to her on his side and crossed a leg over her thighs. It was more than just a position of convenience. He was claiming her, a silent announcement to the world that Aerith was his and no one else's. Pulling her close, the side of her hips fit perfectly against his groin. The look in his face was desperate, lustful, and raw. Aerith reflected his expression of need with one of her own but much less wild in its intensity. His need was like that of a starving lion for food while hers was like that of a cat for its next meal._

_Reaching a hand out, he slowly started caressing the breast closest to him. She turned her head to give him a soft smile before he dove in for her neck. Trailing sloppy kisses down the alabaster column of her neck, he finally came to the sensitive base of her neck. Slowly, he scraped his teeth against her until she made a soft sound in the back of her throat. He started to nip at that spot, while her sounds of pleasure increased in intensity. Then he started to suck at the delicate skin, which felt so smooth and tender in his mouth, until she gave a little whimper of pain. He drew back with a whisper of an apology before capturing her once again in a passionate kiss._

_She opened her mouth as wide as she could for because she wanted as much of him inside of her as possible. His tongue filled her mouth with a warm and sensual sensation. Tilting her head up, she gave him even deeper access to the warm moist cavern of her mouth. He greedily took the offer and slid his tongue down as far into her as he could. She fisted his hair in her hands, gently tugging at his black spikes. While kissing, he still managed to caress her breast in stimulating strokes. Every now and then he paused on her nipple area and gave it extra attention, which earned him a cry of bliss from his lover._

_As he drew his tongue out, she whimpered at the loss. Her swollen lips formed into a soft pout, imploring him to kiss her once again. "Greedy little thing, aren't you?" he said in a deep husky voice. He went back for her neck, and it wasn't long before she was making small incoherent sounds of pleasure._

_He was becoming hard, and she could feel his unfilled desire as he bucked against her side. She wanted to stroke his cloth covered erection and make him cry out with the kind of pleasure that only she could give him. As she started to reach a hand down, Zack took the hint and guided her hand down until it settled on his hardened length. She started stroking him, and he rocked into her hand in an attempt to get even more of that wonderful feeling._

_"Oh gods Aerith," he moaned into her shoulder. "Keep going, that feels . . ." His breath hitched in his throat before he could finish his statement. She kept her strokes at a maddeningly slow pace while he groaned with frustrated need. "Please baby, don't stop," he begged, to which she obliged by stroking him at a now feverish pace._

_It wasn't long before Zack wanted more, so he sat up first and then pulled Aerith up to a sitting position. Now that he had better access to her back, he pulled down the back of her dress so that he could unsnap her bra. It gave with a simple twist of the wrist, and Aerith was alarmed that he managed it with such ease. He'd obviously had some practice with other girls, unless he was just a natural at unsnapping bras, or really lucky. She started to falter in her faith when she thought of all of the other girls Zack had been with. He'd never gone into the details, but rumors spread like wildfire in the Slums. The word around town was that Zack was quite the ladies' man and had ample experience with women._

_She tried to silence the doubts in the back of her mind, but they were too strong at this moment to ignore. How many other girls had he pledged his love to? Was she just another conquest? He probably hadn't had a flower girl before. . . No, that couldn't be, she thought, Zack's love and affection seemed too real. So why did she feel ashamed of herself all of a sudden? Her cheeks burned red with embarrassment as she suddenly became aware of how naked she felt. "Zack," she said panting against shoulder, "I think we better stop."_

_His hands dropped down and fell limp at his sides while Aerith went about re-snapping her bra. Not wanting her to see his look of disappointment, he looked away while he quickly composed himself. Giving her a small smile he said, "Yeah, I guess you're right." Pulling her into a hug he sighed, "Gods Aerith, I'm sorry." His voice came out ragged and raw with pent up sexual frustration. "I just want you so much."_

_She reached for his hand and nuzzled him under the chin. "I know," she said in a wistful tone. He stroked her head as she buried her face into his chest. Wanting to brighten the mood Aerith said, "Why don't we go to the movie now?"_

_"Uhhh Aerith, I think I need to calm down before we leave the church," he said with a sheepish expression on his face. The color crept up into his cheeks as he realized his girlfriend was starting to analyze his 'problem.' She looked down at his pants to find evidence of his arousal still bulging outwards. The situation was more than a little awkward for both of them._

_"Oh," she said in surprise. She put a hand up over her mouth to stifle a giggle._

_"I'll uh. . . just be at the back of the church," he said scratching the back of his head while avoiding her gaze._

_Aerith tried to distract herself with the flowers while Zack walked to the back of the church hoping to solve his 'problem.'_

_Zack found a comfortable spot at the back of the church in the corner and sat down. He tilted his head back and let the cool air wash over him as he tried to think of unsexy thoughts. Zack thought to himself. What's unsexy? Men in thongs, yeah that should work._

_Just then his mind drifted off to a conversation he'd had earlier with the General. Zack never was very good at concentrating on a single subject for long periods of time. He reflexively jerked his thoughts back to the task at hand, unsexy thoughts. Unfortunately, his thoughts of Sephiroth mixed with his previous musings of men in thongs. Before Zack knew it, he was fantasizing about the General in a thong._

In the light of the moon, the General was resplendent in all of his handsomeness. His finely sculpted physique was reminiscent of the gods from the days of the Ancient Cetras. The night luminescence played in prismatic patterns with his moonlight hair, which cascaded down his back in waves. It wafted ever so slightly in the breeze, caressing the muscular and fleshy cheeks of his bare ass. Sephiroth's package, laying delicately against his thighs, looked ample enough to satisfy a whale.

_With a bit of alarm, Zack realized he was having one of those infamous Sephiroth boner-dreams everyone talked so much about. Not only was he not calming down, he was getting more aroused. He cursed himself inwardly, stupid sexy Seph, stupid sexy Seph! It wasn't his fault right? What mere mortal could resist the lure of the General? He needed to think of someone else fast! Zack reminded himself that he had to concentrate on UNSEXY men in thongs. Heidegger! It didn't take long for Zack to start calming down with thoughts of Heidegger's rotund figure bursting out of a tiny thong. His thoughts roamed again. Hojo in a thong! Now what could be unsexier than that? Like a moth drawn to a flame, Zack's eyes went directly to Hojo's scantily clad package, which hung limp like a dead snake, a very small snake._

_"Sweet Shiva, that is wrong!" Zack exclaimed without realizing he was speaking aloud._

_The sudden sound startled Aerith, and she stood up from her flower tending. "Are you okay Zack?" she called towards the back._

_"Yeah," he squeaked. The calming effect of Hojo's thong image was almost instantaneous, and Zack was back to his pre-arousal state in no time. He stood up and did a few squats to help get his blood moving to the appropriate body parts. Then he did a few more to help clear his mind of that disturbing image of Hojo in a thong, nothing like a few squats to help one get over a traumatic experience._

_Clearing his throat, he strode up to the front in his usual gallant air as though nothing had happened. "You ready to go Aerith?" he said with a smile as he reached out a hand to help her up._

_She gave a slight head nod. "Only if you are," she giggled._

_He couldn't help but laugh a little. "Yeah, I think I'm good. Just no more kisses for the rest of the night," he playfully chided her._

_"I don't know if I can manage," she responded with a sparkle in her eyes._

_He reached for her hand with a smile and intertwined his sweaty fingers with her dirt-covered ones. Love wasn't always clean like it was in fairy tales._

_~*~*~*~*~_

_With Aerith at his side, Zack was at the counter of the movie theater ordering some popcorn when he heard someone call out his name._

_"Hey Zack, what are you doing here man?" Kunsel slapped a hand on Zack's shoulder and turned him around._

_With a friendly smile Zack shook his head and said, "Not much man, just taking Aerith out to see a movie."_

_"Oh, what movie are you going to see?"_

_Zack hesitated a moment too long in deciding what to say. In the meantime Aerith blurted out, "The Little Mermaid."_

_"Dude, 'The Little Mermaid?!'" Kunsel's buddy had already started laughing before Kunsel could get all of the words out. "Man, just wait till the guys hear about this. First Class Officer Fair is watching 'The Little Mermaid.'"_

_"Yeah, yeah," he said dismissing them with his hands. "I'd rather be watching 'The Little Mermaid,' with the most beautiful girl on Gaia then watching a movie with you chuckleheads."_

_Their laughter slightly subsided when they realized that Zack had a valid point_

_"Come on Aerith," Zack said grabbing her hand, "let's go watch that movie." Flashing his friends a cocky grin he waved and said, "I'll see you later guys."_

_"Alright man, see ya," Kunsel said with a departing slap on Zack's arm. Kunsel turned to Aerith and winked, "Make sure my boy doesn't enjoy that movie too much, okay Aerith."_

_"I'll keep a close eye on him," she said tossing Zack a mischievous smile._

_After their goodbyes, they walked towards the movie following the path of children into the theater. Zack quickly scouted some seats in the back, and they made their way up. Unfortunately, the theater filled up relatively quickly, and in a matter of minutes Zack and Aerith were surrounded by children. Zack discreetly reached for her hand underneath the cupholder, and she gave him a smile as their fingers intertwined. He would have been happy to stay like that for a while, but the young boy beside Zack had other plans._

_"Hey mister," said the eight year old boy. He was directing his comment to Zack._

_Zack looked around to make sure the kid wasn't referring to anyone else before asking, "Are you talking to me?"_

_"Yeah you, who else?" The boy peered over Zack to look at Aerith, and she gave him a friendly wave._

_"Is that your girlfriend?" He shoved a handful of popcorn in his mouth while waiting for an answer._

_"Why yes she is," Zack said with a proud smile._

_"Ewww, I bet she's got cooties," he responded in disgust._

_Aerith was giggling, but Zack took the comment as an insult, and no one insulted his girlfriend and got away with it. "Look little dude, she doesn't have cooties because she washed them off before she came here. In fact, I even saw her wash them off."_

_While Zack remained oblivious to the implications of what he had just said, Aerith could feel the heat rising in her cheeks. She sat back in her seat waiting for the embarrassment to pass._

_"Oh yeah?" the boy said in a daring, taunting manner._

_"Yeah!" Zack said in an escalation of the boy's tone. "So why don't you say you're sorry?"_

_"Sorry," he said half-heartedly, almost sarcastically. It was an apology made out of force rather than one out of sincerity._

_"Wait a second," Zack said with hushed urgency. He brought his face up close to the boy's shirt and narrowed his eyes as though he was watching something. Throwing Aerith a sidelong glance he said, "Don't look now Aerith, I think this boy has cooties."_

_"What?!" the boy asked with panic. Standing up, he threw his head around trying to look for the cootie bugs Zack had supposedly seen._

_"I can't look," Zack said covering his eyes, "this is the worst case I've ever seen. There's no hope for this one."_

_"Please, mister you have to help me!" the boy pleaded._

_At this point, the people around them were starting to stare. Zack realized he had to cut the joke short if he didn't want to make a scene._

_"Gotcha," Zack said pointing an accusing finger at the boy._

_"Hey, that's not very nice," the boy complained._

_"Yeah," Zack said with a swift up jerk of his chin. "Show me where it says I have to be nice to little punks who insult my girlfriend."_

_The boy did the most insulting thing he could think of, he squinted and stuck out his big pink tongue._

_Rolling his eyes Zack said, "Well that was clever. Anyway, where's your mom? Shouldn't you be bothering her instead?"_

_"Oh, she's right here," the little boy said pointing over to his mother. Zack noticed that she was busy talking on her cell phone. She probably didn't even notice her son's annoying behavior, which meant Zack was going to have to deal with it for the time being._

_The boy took a few nibbles of popcorn and a big slurp of soda before he began bothering Zack again. If Zack thought the cootie bug joke was the end of it, he was wrong. The boy had made it his personal mission to annoy Zack, and wasn't giving up without a fight. "Hey mister, why is your hair so spiky?" The little boy stood up to touch Zack's hair with his greasy hand, but Zack quickly dodged the attack._

_"Whoa, kid, what do you think you're doing?"_

_"I'm just wondering how soft your spikes are," the boy said, trying to pull off a tone of innocent childlike curiosity. Anyone else would have been fooled, but not Zack, he knew better._

_"Well don't, okay," Zack responded in irritation. He quickly ran his hands over his hair making sure no damage had been done._

_At this point Zack couldn't wait for the movie to start. If nothing else, it would get that little boy beside him to be quiet._

_"Hey mister, aren't you a little old for this film?"_

_Zack rolled his eyes before responding, "Listen kid, what's your problem? Do you have a stick up your aaaa. . ." Aerith squeezed his hand tightly causing him to rethink his word choice,". . . aaask me some more questions. Do you have any more questions you'd like to ask?_

_The little boy wrinkled his nose and said, "You're kinda' weird."_

_Zack had to bite his cheek to refrain from saying exactly what was on his mind. If Aerith wasn't there he would have sworn at the boy, but he didn't want Aerith to think he was an insensitive brute, so he kept quiet instead. With a sigh he slumped down into his seat. Yep, this was going to be a LONG movie, Zack thought. It hadn't even started and he couldn't wait to get out of here. Aerith turned and gave him a comforting smile of gratitude, and Zack responded with a wan smile that said, "You're totally worth it, but being here sucks."_

_A hushed silence spread over the whole audience as the movie started, even the annoying little boy next to Zack became quiet. It wasn't long before Zack started squirming uncomfortably in his seat. Sitting still for long periods of time had never been his specialty, which was only compounded by the fact that he had relatively no interest in this film. Aerith gave him a comforting smile and rubbed his knee in soothing strokes, which calmed him down for a few minutes. As the movie progressed, Aerith noticed that he was becoming less restless, a sign that he might actually be enjoying the movie. When it came time for the prince to rescue his mermaid lover, Zack's enthusiasm got the best of him. In a voice much louder than a whisper he said, "Oh yeah!" The people sitting in the immediate vicinity of Zack gave him a mixed variety of shushes and glares. Aerith tried her best to hold in her laughter, but when Zack sank down in his seat and gave a sheepish smile, she couldn't help but laugh._

_He would never admit it to her, but he actually enjoyed the movie. As they made their way out of the theater Aerith asked, "So what did you think of the movie?"_

_Scratching the back of his head, Zack mumbled, "Eh, it was okay."_

_"Just okay?" Aerith asked with a teasing smile._

_With a small smile Zack responded, "Well, maybe a little more than okay."_

_They made their way outside and found a recess in the back of the building where they could take shelter from prying eyes. Zack wrapped his arms around her in an embrace while she curled her fingers into his shirt._

_Looking up at him, she asked in a solemn voice, "Zack, will you come rescue me if I'm in trouble?"_

_"Of course Aerith" he said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. Looking down at her with an over -confident smile he said, "I'd even be there before you could finish screaming for help."_

_"Hmmm," she hummed into his chest. He could feel her lithe body go rigid against him as she asked, "What if you need rescuing?"_

_"Me?!" Zack let out a hearty laugh. "I'm supposed to be the hero, and everybody knows that heroes don't get need rescuing. Besides I'm a 1st Class SOLDIER, nothing happens to guys like us."_

_She cut him off sharply, "Zack, I had a terrible dream last night." She winced as though the words were shards of glass cutting her throat on the way out. "There was fire and lots of blood. You were crying Zack, and there was a deep sorrow within your eyes that I'd never seen before." Her eyes started to water as she lost control of her emotions. She pressed her face into his chest. "I'm scared Zack. . ." her voice began to drift away—to fade—to die._

_The trees snapped in the wind, wild and irregular, like the heart beating in her chest. Zack pulled her close, allowing her to take refuge in his sheltering embrace. The rest of the world seemed to bleed into the background as she buried herself in his chest. Her muffled cries burned him, like acid coating his insides. It pained him to hear her cry because he felt utterly helpless against it. She looked up at him with glassy eyes, tears spilling over and sliding down her face in crystal clear rivulets. Raising his hands to her cheeks, he gently wiped the tears away. In a soothing voice he said, "Don't cry Aerith, it's going to be okay." He gently placed a kiss on the top of her head as he pulled her close once more. He held her for several minutes, safe and secure, until she calmed down._

_Her voice was laced with sadness as she looked up at him and said, "Zack, promise me that you'll always come back to me."_

_He looked deep into her sparkling emerald eyes, damp with hope turned asunder, and felt weak for the first time today. She could have asked for the world in that moment, and he would have given it to her. At the very least he would have died trying. In a gentle but determined voice he said, "Aerith, there is nothing that could keep me away from you, I promise."_

~*~*~*~*~

"Damn it, I was such an arrogant bastard," Zack growled through clenched teeth. "Nothing bad happens to 1st Class SOLDIERs. Yeah right," he said with bitter sarcasm. He pressed his back to the shower wall and closed his eyes. Running his hands through his hair he sighed, "I should have listened to her. Maybe she thinks I left her. . ." His voice trailed off, his thoughts disappearing with the water down the drain. The water continued to pelt him from above, steady, unwavering, and merciless. The warm water had passed the point of being comfortable long ago, and had turned into the sweltering heat of a Gongagan summer day.

Opening up the shower curtain, he stepped out into the cold tile floor. It felt refreshing as the coolness wrapped around his feet and slowly traveled up his legs. The room had become a make-shift sauna, and the sticky mist coated the mirror and walls. Grabbing a towel, he quickly dried himself off before putting on his clothes. He didn't notice it before the shower, but his clothes had a funky smell to them. Now that he was clean, the difference was quite apparent. He was a tad reluctant to put his dirty clothes back on, but he couldn't just go out there naked. It felt strange to take a shower and put on the same clothes he'd worn for months, yet the familiarity of it was comforting. Everything was so different now. He hardly even recognized his own reflection.

Walking up to the foggy mirror, he cut through the mist with a few swipes of his hand. He stared at the stranger in the mirror, a man of twenty-two with bright blue eyes, and jet-black hair. The man blinked when Zack blinked, stuck out his tongue when Zack stuck out his tongue, and crossed his eyes when Zack crossed his eyes. It was hard for him to accept that the stranger in the mirror was himself. So much had changed in all of the years that he had lost. His face was thinner, sharper, and hardened with the burdens inflicted upon him. He looked more like a man than the teenager he was four years ago. Yet underneath all of the pain and hardships, his eyes still managed to hold the same sparkle. He may have been beaten, but he wasn't down, at least not yet. If they were going to take him it would be a fight to the death. He'd choose the liberation of death over the captivity of a sadistic scientist any day.

Giving his hair a quick shake with the towel, he walked out of the bathroom prepared to face the world again. Under the dim glow of the lamp he managed to make out two lumps in the bed and none in the other. Pulling back the covers he found Lilleas snuggled against Cloud. It might have been endearing given a different situation, but he was tired and wanted to go to bed.

He bent over and gently shook her. "Lilleas, come on, you need to go to your own bed." She didn't respond so he picked up her limp form and carried her over to the other bed. Once he set her down on the bed she started to stir. "Why can't I sleep with Cloud?" she asked with a bit of hope in her voice.

He responded curtly, "I'm not discussing this with you tonight."

Her features scrunched up into a pout. "Meanie," she huffed. She pulled the comforters over her head in a statement of anger.

"Well, goodnight to you too," Zack said with a smirk.

Cloud appeared to be deep in the throes of slumber, so Zack carefully got into bed beside him. After all Cloud had been through tonight, Zack didn't want to wake him up. Zack noticed that Cloud was sleeping on his back, peaceful and unguarded, like a child that didn't have a worry in the world. Cloud trusted Zack to be his shield during slumber and protect him from evildoers both real and imagined. That was something Zack could do, he could fight evildoers and get rid of the monsters. It was comforting to know that someone still needed him and actually gave a damn about his existence. Brushing back Cloud's soft blond spikes, Zack said, "See buddy, I told you I'd take care of you. Goodnight Spike."

Zack curled up on his side facing Cloud so that he could watch his friend as he fell asleep. A few minutes of silence passed before Lilleas emerged from under the large pile of blankets. "Goodnight," she managed to say in a meek voice as though it was an apology.

Zack's voice was distant and half-asleep. "Finally saw things my way huh?"

"That, and the fact that I couldn't breathe under there," she said softly and without resentment.

She waited for a response, but none came because Zack and Cloud were fast asleep. When she looked over at the other bed all she could see was a pair of spiky-haired heads, one dark as night and the other light as day. She turned to face them because it made her feel less lonely. It wasn't long before she succumbed to the effects of drowsiness and fell asleep.

~*~*~*~*~

**Author's Note:** I was happy to hear that so many people liked Zack! I was worried because this story does ere towards Zack a bit more than Cloud, just because Zack is not comatose. Oh, and thank you so much for the reviews!!!! I really appreciate feedback ^_^ I wanted to give a big thanks to my lovely beta **Blue Jae** for going over this flashback for me!!! She thoroughly picked through it on two hours of sleep and gave it back to me the next day so I'd have plenty of time to revise it. I also wanted to thank **Mint** for going over some of the story specifics. Thanks **Mint**! Was this the Zerith flashback you wanted **Goopy Sentimentalist**? Yes, no? I know you waited patiently for a while, so I don't know if it lived up to your expectations. I tried! I know that there are other Zerith's out there and I hoped you liked it ^_^ I'll make a note of this here, Aerith and Zack won't be having sex in any of the flashbacks, so rest assured. I think she was a little young, and I don't know that she was ready for it emotionally. I do believe that people in love have sex, but things were complicated for them because she was so young. If she were 18 when they met things might have been different regarding their sexual situation. Aerith is about 16 here and Zack is about 18. Some people just have them kissing, and some people have them going all the way. Knowing what teenagers do in modern day society, which is where this game takes place, they probably did something in between. Also, not every flashback will have them making-out. I'm really not into writing smut (I have no aspirations of becoming a grocery store romance writer), but I think the scene serves a purpose here. Most people write Aerith as someone that's very shy, pensive, and sad. I think she was a bit nervier than people gave her credit for. She may have been a bit socially inept, but she knew how to work her way around the Slums. Did anyone think their relationship came off as a little corny? I hope so because that's how it was in the game. It was incredibly awkward to watch Zack ask her out on a date, and then have her refuse it. Lol, move over Aerith, I'll take him!!! What was she thinking? O_o I bet she fixed that roof of the church so she'd have cute SOLDIER boys drop in. Either that or she was incredibly lucky. I also thought it was funny how Zack tried to explain subtle social rules to her in the game. Also, if you've played FF 7 you probably remember the scene where Aerith explains to Cloud that she thought Zack ran off with some other girl and left her behind. She must have had some doubts about their relationship, which is what I tried to communicate with their make-out session. I still believe that Zack was madly in love with her, but guys and girls are different, well at least I think so. Guys tend to be more physical in their love, and girls tend to be more emotional in their love; I'm just generalizing here. Anyway, if you play FF 7 in light of Crisis Core, it could be interpreted that Aerith is really in severe denial of Zack's death and that she actually knows something really bad happens/he dies. That's just my opinion, and there are others.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

The sun tried to force its way into their room, but it was turned away by the dark beige curtains. Zack had insisted that the curtains remain closed at all times because he was trying to keep their exposure to the public at a minimum. Being obstinate, the light crept around unseen corners and peeked through the cracks where the curtains met the window. Despite the sun's best efforts, its bright rays of light only managed to impart a faint glow to the room.

Upon waking, Lilleas immediately noticed the lack of natural light that she had grown so accustomed to. She was thankful that at least some light had leaked into their dingy motel room because the room was depressing enough as it was. During a quick survey of the room, she noticed that Zack and Cloud were both still asleep. At the moment Cloud was sprawled over Zack like a dirty blanket, his limbs thrown over the raven-haired man in a haphazard fashion. In the middle of the night, Cloud had crawled over to Zack seeking out his warmth and comforting scent. Zack took his friend in and sheltered him, wrapping an arm protectively around his waist.

Remembering Zack's desire to wake up early, she went about trying to wake him up. He just gave an annoyed grunt in response so she figured she'd give him about twenty minutes before trying again. After a couple of failed attempts, it became obvious to her that the sleeping duo wasn't going to wake up easily. It was almost time to resort to more drastic methods, like dumping cold water on Zack, but she figured she'd give him one more chance to wake up before she did that. It's not like he didn't deserve it, she impishly thought.

Giving him a firm shake she said, "C'mon Zack it's time to wake up."

A warm smile crossed his face as he groggily mumbled, "Ma, is that you?"

"Uh, yeah," Lilleas lowered her voice to try and sound more like an adult. She realized he must be coming out of a dream, or still in one. Pretending to be his mother seemed like a good idea at the moment because she didn't have any other ideas to work with, besides the use of cold water. "Time to wake up Zack, uh. . . sweetie." She cringed as her lips managed to form the last word.

His eyes were still lightly closed in slumber, and he clutched Cloud to his chest like a large teddy bear. "Ma, could you make me some pancakes?" he asked. His voice was smooth like that of a juvenile boy, void of the rough edges of masculinity.

Lilleas would have agreed to anything to get him up at this point. "Sure," she replied. She started to walk off in an attempt to fool him into thinking that she was walking to the kitchen.

"Ma!," he called after her as though it was something urgent. "Could you make something for Cloud too? He's real hungry."

Throwing her voice over her shoulder she said, "Okay."

"Ma, I love you," he said in a warm tender voice with a smile enveloping the lower half of his face.

Her heart melted at the childish innocence of his voice. Initially, she wasn't going to return the sentiment, but the simple nature of his voice reminded her of her little sister. She thought it would be harmless to indulge both of their desires. He missed his mom, and she missed her little sister. After a long pause she said, "I love you too."

For a moment she pretended that Zack really was her loving son, she was about to make pancakes, and Cloud was a friend of Zack's that came over to have a good time. She reveled in the thought, allowing herself to actually believe it was true for a few seconds. The feeling was a warmth that wrapped around her, cradled her, and insulated her from the harsh coldness of reality. She could have stayed in that moment forever, suspended in her web of imagination, caught in her own trap.

Suddenly, her momentary flight of fancy came crashing down, like a falling star on a path of destruction. Fading, falling, and plummeting towards the planet, its luminescent path would become nothing more than a memory as it crashed into the planet. The impact of reality temporarily shattered her spirit. The truth of the matter was that she didn't have a loving family, they were going to have vending machine food for breakfast, and Cloud was definitely not having a good time. She glanced over at the blond man, so fragile and child-like, clinging onto Zack and trying so desperately to hold onto life. It just wasn't fair, she thought. . .

A voice, soft and sudden, broke through her thoughts. "Ma! How's it comin'? Cloud's getting really hungry."

"Almost done," she replied softly.

Rubbing Cloud's arm, Zack whispered in a reassuring voice, "Don't worry buddy, we're going to eat soon."

Cloud nuzzled him in response and let out a soft moan of hunger.

She came over to Zack and said, "Alright, done."

As he sat up, he took in the scene with half-lidded eyes glazed over with sleepiness. Zack noticed that the room was green and smelled more like cigarette smoke than pancakes. Actually it smelled exactly like cigarette smoke. That must mean. . . turning to his side he found a fourteen year old girl where he expected his mom to be. He turned to look at Cloud and let out a long languid sigh. "Guess that means no pancakes."

"No. . . " she said dragging out the word in embarrassment. She felt slightly ashamed that she had fooled him in such a vulnerable state.

He looked up at her with a half-smile and said, "Nah, don't worry about it. Junk food's still good. Anything's good on an empty stomach." Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes he said, "Why don't you get some tea started for me, and then wake me back up again."

She gave him a discerning look as she contemplated whether she could trust him or not.

Zack noticed her worried expression and said, "Don't worry, I'm just going to rest my eyes. Look at poor Cloud, he looks like he wants some company."

"Alright," she said in irritation, "but you better wake up because I'm just going to let you sleep next time."

He gave a slight nod while yawning and plopped back on the bed beside Cloud.

She came back a few minutes later with a cup of steaming tea. True to his word, he woke up when she brought the tea. He took a slow sip of the piping hot liquid, which came close to scalding his mouth. "Ooo, that's kind of hot," he said into his cup. As the warm liquid filled his body, he started to feel revitalized. He took another few sips before setting it down on the nightstand.

Lilleas sat on the bed, watching and observing, waiting for instructions. She watched as Zack got up and started doing some squats. "Is that what you normally do every morning?"

His pace slowed a bit as he answered her question. "Yep, well most of the time. It helps get the blood moving."

Her head moved up and down with his movements until he came to a stop. "Okay," he grunted. "You want to help me prepare Cloud's medicine?"

She acquiesced with a slight nod. After preparing the medicine in the water bottle Zack went over to his sleeping friend. Zack gave Cloud a gentle shake, but he was reluctant to wake up. "Come on buddy," Zack said, "after you drink this you can have some food." Cloud's head seemed to perk up a little bit so Zack continued in words Cloud could easily understand, "Mmmm, tasty food. Yum, yum. You like food, remember?" Zack started rubbing his belly to emphasize his point, but his efforts were lost on Cloud.

~*~*~*~*~

Cloud did remember, he liked food, and it had been a long time since he last ate. He wasn't sure what they were going to have for breakfast, but he didn't really care. As long as it stopped the gnawing pain in his stomach, that was good enough for him. His body still hurt all over, but as the pain had subsided, his hunger had increased in intensity. Food didn't hold the same excitement that it used to though. Everything seemed to have a very similar texture now, akin to oatmeal that's been left out too long, lumpy, slimy, and thick. What the hell was Zack feeding him? Well it didn't really matter because he'd eat anything at the moment to quell the roaring beast of hunger in his stomach. Once, Zack gave him that sweet creamy food. He couldn't remember the exact taste, but it was creamy, sweet, and fruity. Maybe if he was good Zack would give him that again. One could always hope, right? It's not like he had anything else to look forward to in life. . .

~*~*~*~*~

Zack gave soothing words of encouragement as Cloud reluctantly drank down the medicine water. After Cloud finished the bitter medicine-water, he gave a quick shake of his head while his features twisted into an 'ugh face.' Lilleas brought a hand up over her mouth to stifle a giggle, but she really did feel bad for him. "Yeah, I know, that stuff is pretty nasty," Zack commented as he eyed the water bottle ensuring that Cloud drank all of it.

In a voice filled with pride Zack said, "Alright buddy, you just accomplished 'Mission: Take your medicine.'" Zack took one of Cloud's limp wrists and simulated a high-five as he said, "Give me five Spike." He continued, "After that medicine kicks in we'll commence, 'Mission: Breakfast.' Trust me," Zack said with a waggle of his eyebrows, "you'll like this mission better than the last one."

Zack carefully repositioned himself against the headboard with a pillow resting on his abdomen. He pulled his friend up on the pillow whereby Cloud turned his head to the side and closed his heavy eyelids. Resting a hand over Cloud's chest, Zack could feel himself falling into the realm of sleep once again. With a big yawn, Zack tried to wipe the sleepiness from his face, but it was becoming hard to stay awake. The soft staccato of his friend's heart was like the sea rhythmically crashing into the cliffs. Not only that, but his friend looked so calm, peaceful, and content at the moment. It felt like an invitation to go to sleep. How could he refuse when Cloud was being so polite about it? Perhaps he would just close his eyes, that wouldn't hurt, right? He was Zack Fair, former 1st Class SOLDIER. He could fight this sleepiness thing. The lulling beat of his friend's heart continued to pull him under. Lub-dub, lub-dub, lub-dub, lub-dub. . .

"Zack, c'mon you fell asleep again," Lilleas said in annoyance as she roughly shook him awake.

"Huh? What?" Zack took a quick look around the room and saw an empty water bottle next to him. "I guess Cloud's already had his medicine." A sleepy smile started to spread on his face. "Hey, that means it's time for breakfast." Looking over towards his backpack he said, "Lilleas can you bring me the backpack?"

She brought it over to him and put it up on the bed so that he could access the contents inside. As he started pulling out the food, he asked, "Have you already eaten Lilleas?"

"Yeah, well let's just say I had a lot of free time this morning," she said in a dry manner that was sure to be noticed.

Zack paused for a second, but he decided it was too much trouble to respond to her comment, so he just resumed pulling the food out of the bag and arranging it in a haphazard line-up. His eyes went wide with huger as he looked at all of the food. After the events of last night, he didn't get a chance to eat anything so his stomach was burning from emptiness. "Alright, what do we have here? Honeybuns, cookies, chocolate cupcakes, and crispy rice treats." Turning to Cloud he gave him a gentle nudge and asked, "What do you want buddy?"

Cloud let out a deep hungry moan, "Unnnnnggggghhh."

"Good choice, honeybuns it is," Zack said with some excitement.

Lilleas watched Zack rip open the package and stuff the honeybun into his mouth. She turned her head and gave him a scrutinizing look. "Wait, I thought you were going to feed Cloud first."

His words were garbled by a large chunk of food in his mouth as he said, "I am." He put a hand over his mouth as he finished chewing and then spit the large wad into his hand. "Well, the poor kid can't chew. How else am I supposed to feed him?" His tone was sharp and biting, though it was directed at the situation and not at Lillieas.

"Oh. . . ," her voice trailed off, she felt a tad guilty for her accusation.

Zack rolled up the ball of food and set it down on the night table while he pulled his friend up so that he was in an upright position. Cloud's head was resting on his shoulder, his eyes were only slightly open, but he was awake and ready to eat. "Alright Spike, open your mouth wide," Zack said as he squished open his friend's mouth. He stuffed the ball of food towards the back of his tongue so that it would be easier to swallow.

Using his tongue, Cloud crushed the malleable ball into fragments before swallowing. Cloud noted that this lumpy ball of oatmeal tasted sweet, unlike the rest of the lumpy balls that Zack fed him which tasted salty. His lips twitched into a small smile as he relished the sweet aftertaste that coated his mouth and the back of his throat.

Zack chuckled, "Oh, so you like that huh?" Well there's plenty more where that came from."

Zack fed Cloud the rest of that honyebun, and then the other two honeybuns that were left. He expected Cloud to be full after the first one, but Cloud kept eating so Zack kept feeding him. "You've sure got an appetite today. I hope you're not going to get sick on me because if you throw up again I'm going to make you clean it up this time." It was an empty threat, but he didn't want Cloud to think he could do whatever he wanted without consequences. The line had to be drawn somewhere, even if it was an imaginary line.

After scarfing down three honeybuns, Cloud managed to finish off several cookies, some crispy rice treats, and a cupcake, well almost. Zack noticed that he started to slow down on the cupcake. His swallowing time kept getting longer and longer until he eventually just stopped swallowing. Cloud really did want to eat it, but his shrunken stomach was twisting and churning in protest.

"Here, spit it out," Zack commanded. He put a hand out in front of his friend's mouth to catch the partially chewed up object. Cloud spit out a mass of partially chewed gooey chocolate cupcake. Zack slightly grimaced at the sight in his hand, "Oh man, this looks like shit." His expression softened as he looked over at his friend, his mouth covered in the same chocolate cupcake goo. "It had to be a chocolate cupcake, huh buddy? Well next time, no chocolate cupcake for you." He let out a laborious sigh as he realized Cloud's cupcake mess was only the start of the day. "You stay right here, I'm going to get something to clean you up."

Zack got up and promptly dumped the offensive object into the nearest trash can. As soon as he entered the bathroom he washed his hands. Then he took a rag and applied some soap and water to it. Coming out of the bathroom he went right over to the bed and said, "Alright Spike, let's get you cleaned up."

Kneeling by the bed, he lifted his friend's head and tilted it so that Cloud was facing him. Cloud could sense what was coming next so he squinted in anticipation of the wet rag. The indignation of it all was almost too much to bear. He was twenty years old, not two. Why didn't Zack understand this simple point?

As the wet rag descended upon him, he tried to turn his head away and wiggle out of Zack's firm hold, but his efforts were futile. "If someone didn't know better they'd think I was trying to torture you there Spike," Zack said with a sympathetic half-smile. "Hold still, I'm almost done." After he finished wiping the mess off of his friend, he inspected his work and said, "There, you're clean now. That wasn't so bad was it?"

Cloud let out an angry grunt, "Nnnngggh."

This prompted Zack to scoff, "Yeah, well if you weren't so messy, we won't have to do this." After throwing the dirty rag in the bathroom, Zack came back and popped the other half of the cupcake in his mouth. After clearing it from his mouth with his tongue, he rubbed his hand together as he said, "Alright, let's get ready to go. Are you all ready Lilleas?"

"Yep."

"Okay, now we just have to get Cloud ready. This SOLDIER gear is just screaming fugitive." He walked over to his friend and removed Cloud's SOLDIER gear. "What do you think Cloud, sword or no sword?"

Cloud gave a listless head nod in response.

"Yeah, you're right. I can't risk leaving it in here. This isn't a good part of town." Rubbing his chin he pondered, "Well at least one of us is disguised." He sighed, "Oh well. Not much else I can do about the sword."

"Alright Spike, you ready to go?"

Cloud lay motionless against the beige bedding, which was a sharp contrast to the ragged pink thing tied around his head. Looking at his friend contemplatively, Zack said, "You know what, I better take a look at that wound again and make sure it hasn't gotten worse." Lilleas came over to watch as Zack removed the pink make-shift bandage. As she bent forward to get a closer look, she brought her hands over her mouth to hide a gasp. Zack shifted uncomfortably on the bed. "Shit, that's worse than I remembered. There's not enough skin for the superglue to hold it together. What are we going to do now. . ." Zack said in slight despair.

Lilleas just sat back on the bed in an effort to remove herself from the situation. She thought about saying something that would ease the tension in the room. However, she didn't have anything beneficial to add Zack's one-sided conversation, so she just tried to stay out of the way.

With a sigh, Zack pulled Cloud into his lap. "Come here buddy, let me have a closer look." Being careful not to touch the actual wound, Zack softly parted the surrounding hair so that he could see the wound better. Cloud found the simple tactile sensation to be much more painful than anticipated, and he squirmed in response. "Easy there Spike, I'm not trying to hurt ya." Turning to Lilleas he asked, "Could you shine the lamp over here?"

She brought the lamp over and held it above Cloud's head. The lamp was heavy so she had to hold it with two hands. Slowly she opened an eye to peek at his wound. It looked kind of like freshly butchered meat, chunky and red, very, very red. Her eye shut almost as soon as it opened.

"Lilleas, could you hold the light steady?" Zack asked in annoyance.

"Oh, sorry," she said, opening her eyes.

"There, thank you." Turning his attention back to Cloud he carefully examined the wound. "Well I can't just leave it like this. I've got to try something. I kind of remember something about this in that first aid elective class I took."

"Are you talking to me?" Lilleas asked.

"Hmmm," Zack said coming out of his reflection, "sort of." With an affirmative nod of the head he said, "I think I've got it."

"Got what?" she asked in response.

"You'll see."

"Well that's what you said the last time with the superglue. Is this idea going to be any better?"

"Why, you got any better ideas?"

"Well no," she said bringing the lamp down over her face to cover her embarrassment.

Zack let out a slight chuckle, "Well then I think we're going with my idea then." Turning his attention to Cloud once again he said, "Alright buddy, I'm going to wrap it back up now. Don't worry, it's going to get better." Giving his friend a sympathetic smile he wrapped the pink rag back around his head. Once the bandage was back on, Cloud seemed to relax once again into the bed.

"That's it Spike, you can go back to sleep now," Zack said tenderly.

Since everyone was ready, he picked up Cloud and was about to head out the door when he noticed that a blanket was dragging behind them. "Huh?" His eyes trailed the blanket all the way up to Cloud, who had a firm grip on it. With a slight chuckle he said, "I guess you want to take the blanket. Alright, let me wrap you up and then we'll be out the door."

Setting Cloud down on the bed, he spread out the blanket and then wrapped him up like a human enchilada. As he picked him up, Zack said playfully, "I spoil you too much Spike, you know that right." Cloud turned his face in towards Zack's chest to hide the small smile that crept up on his lips. He almost always got his way with Zack, and he knew it too. It was one of the few benefits of being a twenty-year old man that bore some resemblance to a cute cuddly chocobo.

With his wrapped-up chocobo in tow, Zack and Lilleas headed towards town. With a hint of dark sarcasm, Zack said, "Don't we look like a freak-show." He wasn't sure who he was directing the comment towards, but Lilleas took it as an insult.

"Hey," she said in indignation, "speak for yourself."

Leaning down towards Cloud Zack said, "I think Lilleas just called us freaks."

"What?! That's not what I said," she replied, but she could see that Zack was smiling so her voice softened. "Besides, I was directing the comment towards you, not Cloud."

"What can I say," Zack said with smugness, "I'm one of a kind."

With a cocked eyebrow she said, "How is it that you manage to turn everything negative into something positive."

His smug expression melted into one of wisdom, the kind possessed by a battle-hardened warrior who has seen more trauma than any human should see. Looking down at Cloud, he said, "Sometimes that's the only thing you can do. Isn't that right buddy?"

Cloud let out a sleep husky moan, "Mmmmmnnnnn."

"See Lilleas, he agrees with me," Zack said with a smile.

"Always," she said returning his smile with one of her own.

~*~*~*~*~

The light of day had transformed the nice part of town into something that was much more glamorous. Now that the mask of night had been removed, its homey essence had been replaced by a much more opulent one. There was a fresh coat of paint on almost each of the buildings. They stood proud, happy of their position in life, for being a well cared for building is a nice thing to be.

In their search for the pharmacy, they passed through the center of town. They couldn't help but notice a large fountain that stood in their path. With angels spouting water up towards the heavens, it lent an elegant feeling to the town square. Quaint wooden benches encircled the fountain while blossoming flowers adorned the area. It was a place where moms watched their children play and lovers enjoyed a quaint afternoon. Zack couldn't help but wish that Aerith was with him at the moment.

"Is something wrong?" Lilleas asked.

"No, I. . .uh. . . I was just looking for the pharmacy," Zack managed to reply.

"Oh, okay. Me too," she said. She was hoping he'd start to open up, but he still seemed very secretive about certain issues. Perhaps in time he'd learn to trust her, she thought.

Finding the pharmacy had proven to be more difficult than Zack had anticipated. Unlike the motel, it didn't have a pink neon size advertising its location. It stood hidden amongst the other buildings, taking shelter in their flashy style that was typical of this part of town. Upon approaching it, Zack directed Lilleas to stay outside with Cloud. "Scream if anyone suspicious comes near you okay?"

"How will I know?"

"Trust me, you'll know. If someone points a gun at you then that's a pretty good hint," Zack said in slight exasperation. "Alright, I'm going to try and be quick about this. Take care of Cloud, and don't hesitate to scream if someone threatens you." As he walked backwards towards the store, he shook a finger at her and said, "I'm counting on you."

"Okay," she said with a nod. She wrapped an arm around Cloud, and his floppy head fell onto her shoulder. "Don't worry, Zack's going to be back soon," she reassured him. She thought she heard Cloud let out a sigh of relief, but she tried to tell herself it was only the wind, a very light and human sounding gust of air.

~*~*~*~*~

Briskly walking into the pharmacy, Zack quickly located the lotion and cream aisle. Zack reminded himself to stay focused because he needed to limit their time out in the open. He couldn't be distracted by such things as. . .

"Condoms," he said in a surprised whisper. It wasn't his fault if they were conveniently located in the lotion and cream isle. Picking up the box, his fingers affectionately graced over the package. "It's been a long time since I've seen you guys." With a sigh he put the box back and said, "Well, I guess I won't be needing this for a while." As he went to turn around, he heard a light feminine giggle from behind him.

"Do you always talk to condoms?" she asked in a flirtatious manner.

He flashed her a sheepish grin, "Uh, not usually, no."

She reached out a hand, and said, "Hi, my name is Haley."

He gave her a bit of a blank stare before he returned the greeting. "Hi, my name is Zzzz. . . ," he stopped himself before he revealed his name. With a nervous laugh he said, "Sorry, it's been a long day and I have my mind on other things. My name is Kunsel." Taking her hand, he firmly shook it, more like a business greeting than a flirtatious one.

"That's quite a firm handshake you have there," she said in a coy manner. She could sense his reluctance to chat, but she wasn't about to let him get away so easily.

"Yep," he said in a matter of fact voice. Avoiding her gaze he said, "So listen, I've got lots of stuff to do but it was nice meeting you. Maybe I'll see you again." With his head bowed down, he walked away and left her standing dazed and confused. He thought to himself, see you again? Where did that come from? Scolding himself, he tried to refocus his thoughts on finding the items that he came in there for.

~*~*~*~*~

Drawing imaginary circles in the ground, Lilleas asked, "So Cloud, what are you thinking about?"

There was no answer.

"Are you asleep again?"

There was then such a silence that Lilleas could hear his shallow breaths against her ear.

She let out a soft chuckle, "I can see why Zack likes talking to you. You're a good listener." Turning to look at the man asleep on her shoulder she said, "I bet you hear everything I'm saying though."

Just then, a hard cold object landed on her leg, and she jerked her head up in anticipation of a fight. She had already taken a large breath in and was ready to scream, but what she found brought a smile to her face, it was a 10 gil pence.

Holding it up to Cloud she said with enthusiastic cheer, "Hey, this must be our lucky day. Someone gave us some money."

It wasn't long before more coins started falling out of the sky from random benefactors. Lilleas couldn't help but think that maybe this really was their lucky day.

~*~*~*~*~

Back in the pharmacy Zack was actively hunting down the items he needed. "Alright, so I got the petroleum jelly, now I need some sterile saline, gauze, and some iodine." He managed to pick up the rest of the items without running into any more amorous females. Walking up to the cash register, he saw some chocolate, which reminded him of the fact that he'd only eaten half a cupcake for breakfast because Cloud had eaten the rest of the food. He picked up a few chocolate bars and added them to his purchase. After buying everything, he walked outside to find Lilleas with Cloud, her skirt full of coins.

"Look, people gave us money," she said lifting her skirt a little.

Zack's face contorted into a grimace.

"What? I thought you'd be happy," she said with slight bewilderment. "What's wrong with money?"

"Do you remember that war vet we saw on the way to the motel?"

"Yeah,"

His voice carried a tired tone as he continued his explanation. "Well those people throwing money thought of you and the war vet as one and the same. They took pity on you because they felt sorry for you."

"Oh. . ." her voice trailed off as she came to realize what Zack had just told her. "I thought they were just being friendly." In defense she exclaimed, "We didn't ask for it!"

Zack shushed her, "Ssssh, keep your voice down. I'm not mad, just. . . " he took a big breath as he struggled to find the words, "well, it's hard to explain."

Crouching down on the ground beside Cloud, Zack pulled his friend to his chest. He tucked Cloud's head under his chin and slowly threaded his fingers through the flaxen hair. "I'm sorry buddy. I know this is so far from where you wanted to be." Holding his friend close, Zack's mind started to drift off.

Zack wasn't sure what to make of things anymore. In a world where angels deserved to die and people walked topsy-turvy on a straight path, he wasn't sure where his place was in the scheme of things. He thought he knew, once, but that was a long time ago. Perhaps the time of heroes had long past. What was he to do in a world that chewed him up and spit him out?

Fight.

That's what he could do. If the world didn't have a place for him then he was going to create one, together with Cloud. He knew they'd be fine as long as they were together.

Cloud sensed Zack's troubling thoughts and nuzzled him under the chin in an affectionate gesture.

Zack placed a kiss on the top of his friend's head. "Thanks Spike," Zack said with renewed vigor, "you always know what to do. We'll make it through this thing, together we'll fight."

~*~*~*~*~

**Author's Note:** I wanted to thank **Mint** for helping me with a lot of the details of this chapter! It usually takes me forever to figure that stuff out by myself, so she was a big help. Thanks **Mint**! Also, I wanted to get this chapter out sooner rather than later because I have two more exams next week. I had two this week, one last week, and one the week before that, and so on. If I didn't get the chapter out today then it might not get done for another week and a half. The next chapter should be longer. Well, in the next chapter they go to the grocery store, something a bit traumatic happens, Cloud gets a bath, and gets his wound fixed up. Let's see if I can fit all of that in for next time! Also, I learned a bit more about wound care because I'm taking pathology. Well I couldn't go back and reverse things, but Cloud's wound was too bad to stitch back together. When a wound is that large, they either do a skin graft or let it heal by secondary intention. A skin graft was out of the question, so healing by secondary intent it is! Lol, I guess it would help if this story was fully written out before I posted everything, but this is like the live performance of a show I suppose. Everyone gets to experience my mistakes with me. Also, do not do any of these things at home! I don't know that I should have to say this, but I just want to cover myself in case someone does ^_^' You never know. . . Also, Haley is not going to have a large part. This will probably be her only appearance, but she did need a name. If she does appear it will only be like another chapter or two. I've had enough problems with Lilleas and this is a Clack story. I just didn't want anyone to get worried that I was introducing another OC. The next flashback will be a Clack one, well the next one will be short, and then Cloud will have a nightmare, and then there will be a long Clack flashback. Yep, that's the order of things. Oh, if you didn't understand the food thing, here's my explanation. So Zack prechews all of Cloud's food. Much of the taste must be gone by the time he gives it to Cloud. Also, it would be really mushy, but kind of chunky, like oatmeal. So I just tried to think of how Cloud would see the situation. The sweet, creamy, fruity thing was a reference to baby food. Once again, thank you so much for the reviews!!! I really appreciate them ^_^

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Zack or Cloud, or the Final Fantasy World. I do own Lilleas however and the town of Fairton.


	15. Chapter 15

**Warning:** This chapter is rated **Teen**, but it does have some violence, implied torture, and offensive language in the flashback.

**Chapter 15**

While Cloud and Zack were huddled together, absorbed in their own world, Lilleas stared off into the distance. A chirping bird in a lone tree caught her wandering eyes, and she couldn't help but wonder who it was talking to. Maybe it wasn't talking to anyone, she thought, perhaps it was just singing for its own enjoyment. It was a pretty song, a lilting melody with a melancholic edge. She closed her eyes to focus on the song, letting it transport her through various fantasies. Just as she happened upon a particularly nice fantasy, concerning a knight with golden hair and glowing blue eyes, the bird seemed to stop and fly away. Then she was left alone with the empty buzz of the background, which slowly started to lull her into a light slumber.

After a while, Zack turned to Lilleas and gently shook her shoulder. "Are you ready to go to the grocery store?"

"Yeah, I guess so," she said, her voice still heavy with sleep.

"Here," Zack said handing her a chocolate bar, "these always used to make Cloud feel better."

She took the candy bar with a reluctant smile, and allowed Zack to help her up. After picking Cloud up, Zack tried to motivate the group with enthusiasm. "Alright, now that we're all ready, let's go to the grocery store. Eh, who am I kidding?" he added dismissively, "it's just a boring old grocery store." Zack looked down at his friend, who appeared to be fading from exhaustion. "Hang in there Spike, we're almost done."

~*~*~*~*~

Zack looked up at the bright red letters popping out of a large rectangular building. "FOODMART. Well guys, it looks like we've found it." Nodding his head in the direction of the grocery carts he said, "Hey Lilleas, why don't you go over and get a cart. I kind of have my hands full with Spike here."

She promptly returned with a cart, and Zack carefully placed Cloud inside. She gave words to what they were both thinking and said with hesitation, "I, uh, think he's a little big for it."

Looking at his friend in contemplation, Zack tried rearranging the blanket a few different ways, hoping that it would make a difference. But it didn't matter. In the end, Cloud's knees were still bunched up to his chest, and there was little room for food in the cart. With a half-smile of sympathy Zack said, "Sorry Spike, I guess they don't make grocery carts for twenty-year old men. Hmmm, why don't you go get another cart Lilleas. We'll just each push one."

She did as she was told and they both entered the store with a cart in hand. Upon entering, they were immediately greeted by the pleasant aroma of freshly baked donuts. The enticing smell of warm dough coated in fat and sugar lured them in, and before they knew it they had a bag full of donuts. Dropping them off in Cloud's lap Zack said, "Here, I'll leave you in charge of the donuts. "

Cloud didn't respond. His eyes were open, but they looked vacant, like a blue bottomless pit. Zack noticed and gave Cloud a playful shake of the head. "Hey, is anyone in there?" Zack threw him a hopeful expression and answered for him, "Don't worry, I know you're somewhere in there."

Pushing the cart down the bread aisle Zack said, "Alright, we're moving on." Zack's eyes went wide as he took in the vast bread selection. "Let's see, we're going to need something to eat for a week while we're in the motel." He turned to Lilleas and asked, "What do you think of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches?"

"Sure." Her voice picked up in enthusiasm as she asked, "Can we get some grape jelly?"

"Yeah, that's fine." He gave her a little smile, "you like it that much, huh?"

"Yep, it's always been my favorite."

After picking up several loaves of bread, along with peanut butter and jelly, they picked up some dried meat, crackers, a can opener, and plastic utensils. Zack took an unexpected turn down the baking aisle and Lilleas followed a step behind, all the while wondering how they were going to bake a cake without an oven or the rest of the ingredients.

"Ah, here it is," Zack said after carefully examining a small can, "just what I was looking for."

Handing her the can, he started to load boxes of it into the cart. Reading the label, she asked in utter confusion, "Condensed milk, what's that for?"

"To drink," Zack said in a matter-of-fact voice.

Her nose wrinkled in a show of disgust, "Drink it?"

"Yeah, these are old-fashioned war rations. They've got a lot of calories, so they pack quite a punch."

"Oh."

Zack's certain expression seemed to fade as he came over to Cloud. Giving Cloud an affectionate pat on the arm he said, "Besides this morning, he hasn't been eating much. He needs a little more meat on his bones."

Lilleas walked over to Cloud and squished his sizeable bicep. "I don't know, he looks meaty enough to me."

Zack gave a small chuckle because it wasn't often that someone called Cloud 'meaty.' Moving past her comment he explained, "Well he used to be really strong. He's gotten weak ever since the. . . uh. . ." The last few words tumbled out of his mouth, falling onto the ground, waiting to be picked up.

"Hmmm," she said resuming the conversation where it left off, "I get what you mean."

With a big sigh, Zack tried to put the issue behind him. "Okay, now it's time to find the baby food, and then we can go home."

As they moved over to the baby food aisle, a sudden thought dawned on Zack. "Lilleas, could you get some children's acetaminophen? You know the liquid kind they give to small children that can't chew."

Tilting her head in concentration she said, "I think I know what you're referring to." She continued on in innocent curiosity, "Wait, how come you didn't get it at the pharmacy?"

His face started to flush a light pink as an image of that girl in the pharmacy came up. It wasn't that he had a thing for her, but she was attractive and he felt guilty for being so easily distractible. Lying never came easy to Zack, so he avoided her gaze as he curtly said, "I don't know, I just forgot. I'm human, okay."

There was a sharp edge to his voice that cut, and Lilleas felt wounded. She wondered why he felt the need to be so defensive over something like acetaminophen. Slowly backing away from him, she put up her hands in defense and said, "Okay, okay, I'll get the medicine."

"Get three bottles," he called out after her.

After she left, he felt guilty for being so harsh towards her. Lilleas wasn't accusing him of anything, so why did he feel as though it was an accusation. He held back a frustrated sigh as he wondered what had bothered him so. At least he didn't think it was the girl. Maybe he was just tired, he told himself. He looked over at Cloud to help him take his mind off of things. "How are you doing with those donuts Spike?"

Cloud was silent at the moment with his head slumped over, but both hands were resting protectively on the full bag of donuts.

"Good job buddy, I knew I could count on you." There was true pride in his words as though he was praising Cloud for completing a difficult mission, such as killing a Holy Tonberry. Although difficult is a relative term, and at the moment guarding the donuts was a difficult task for Cloud.

Zack then turned his attention to the shelves full of baby food. "Let's see what we have here," Zack said while pulling down various jars. With a voice full of sarcasm he said, "Yum, yum, turkey with stuffing. You like this one remember?"

Despite Cloud's silence, Zack paused as though his friend was really answering his question.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to give you this crap again." Continuing his one-sided conversation, he shrugged his shoulders and said, "What? How was I supposed to know it was going to taste bad? Turkey and stuffing is good right? I guess it's just not good blended together and liquefied."

Zack shuddered as he remembered the taste of it. He had a bad habit of tasting the food that Cloud refused to eat because he couldn't resist the chance to prove his friend wrong. Much to Zack's chagrin, Cloud had been right every time, so far at least.

Looking through the top shelf, Zack found the fruit-flavored baby food, which he knew was Cloud's favorite. "Oh yeah, now we're talking, strawberries and bananas. It doesn't get much better than that, does it Spike?"

After a period of silence, Zack turned around to face his friend because the quietness was starting to bother him. Bending over, he closely examined Cloud. Nothing seemed of the ordinary, except for a long line of saliva hanging from the corner of his mouth. Zack's neutral expression softened into one of affection as he said, "You're drooling again kiddo. Here," he said raising the blanket to wipe off his mouth and chin. "It's okay, we're almost done. Then you can drool all you want."

Cloud gave a grunt of annoyance, leading Zack to conclude that he was more aware than he led on.

"I'm kidding!" Zack said holding up his hands in defense. "Man, you really can't take a joke. You need to lighten up there Spike."

He then loaded several jars of baby food into Lilleas' cart. After he was done he came up behind Cloud, draped himself against Cloud's shoulders, and wrapped his long arms around him. "I'm kind of tired Spike," he said with a sigh as he leaned into him. A soft smile of comfort spread over his face as he rested his chin on Cloud's shoulder. "You know, you're kind of comfy. I could get used to this."

Before their conversation could get any further, Lilleas approached with a bounce in her step, as though nothing upsetting had happened five minutes ago. Her voice was full of excitement as she said, "Okay guys, I got the children's liquid acetaminophen, and a surprise."

Zack pulled his chin up and stood at attention. "Hmmm? What ya got?"

Whipping it out from behind her back she said, "This!"

Cloud and Zack immediately froze, both paralyzed by the sight in front of them, a large cylindrical tub of green gelatin. Under the fluorescent lights of the grocery store, it radiated an unnatural glow, like Mako. They both fell into a trance, unable to turn away from the sight in front of them.

Lilleas immediately noticed their disturbing behavior, but hadn't yet realized it was the gelatin that was responsible for it. "Uh Zack, what's wrong?" That's when she realized that both Cloud and Zack were staring at the gelatin, so she put it on the shelf and hid it behind a box. Her voice took on a tense edge and started to waver. "Why are you guys still staring? The gelatin is gone now. Cut it out, you're really starting to scare me."

It was too late for they'd both already started to fall into a dark reminiscence, a shared memory of something they thought they'd hidden deep enough that it would stay buried. But like a dead body disposed of at sea, some unwanted things surface no matter how hard you try and weigh them down.

~*~*~*~*~

_His world was made up of the alternating colors of green and black. Each color filled the entirety of his vision until nothing else was left except for one color. It was always the same, green darkened to black and black faded to green. Over time, Zack had grown used to this monotonous pattern. As he shifted between colors, he could never remember his experiences from the previous one, but a lapse of memory was better than a dark reminiscence. _

_One day, his world faded to light green, which gave way to a faint translucent green. Suddenly, a whole other world materialized in front of him, something beyond the green and black worlds he'd been living in. This was a new world filled with sterile metal, medical apparatuses, and a table with constraints. Confusion and a paralyzing fear overtook his being, and he started to question himself. Had this world always been there? What of the green and black worlds? Why was he in a large cylindrical tank filled with glowing green liquid in nothing but his boxers? Then came the throbbing, a sharp pulsating pain in his head. Something was trying to make him remember that which he forgot. _

_Looking around the room he saw another tank, much like his own, complete with a blond spiky-haired man bobbing up and down in the viscous green liquid. The throbbing in his head grew more intense, something was so familiar about the man. Why did that blond hair remind him of a chocobo? Once again, the throbbing continued, like a hammer pounding into his head, the intensity of the pain was excruciating. The thoughts kept rapidly cycling in his head, blond. . . spiky hair. . . chocobo. . . lab. . . green. . . blond. . . spiky hair. . . Spike! That other man was his friend, Spiky! _

_As he moved to the side of his tank, a searing pain crawled through his limbs, like a thousand fire ants on the attack. Looking down at his body he noticed numerous scars, many that appeared freshly formed. "What the hell is going on here?" Zack asked incredulously. "How long have I been in this tank?" He turned his attention to his friend's tank hoping that his friend could provide some answers. _

_A strained hiss escaped through his clenched teeth as he slowly trudged through the pain and Mako. Now that he was facing his friend, he could see just how utterly lifeless he looked. Banging on the glass, he screamed, "Cloud wake up! C'mon buddy it's me! It's. . . " _

_Wait, who was he? He stopped to ponder the disturbing thought. There was a sinister voice in the back of his mind that said, "You're in no position to be making demands Specimen 520, so I suggest you listen up. Unless you want a repeat performance of that thrilling game we played yesterday, which your little blonde friend enjoyed so much. What do you say Specimen 520? It's all up to you." _

_Those chilling words worked themselves under his skin, like a feeding parasite, giving him a creepy-crawly feeling. Digging his nails into his arms, he tried to scratch away the horrible feeling, but it didn't go away. For now he'd just have to live with it. _

_He was almost certain that the person behind that creepy voice had something to do with his current imprisonment. In any case, he was pretty sure that his real name wasn't Specimen 520. He knew that no mother would bestow that kind of a name upon her child, unless she was an evil scientist with a penchant for human experimentation. _

_A much sweeter voice, distinct from the sinister one, rose up from the depths of his mind. Her voice rang out much louder and stronger than the other one. "It's good to see you again Zack. The flowers kept me busy, but I still missed you." She wrapped her arms loosely around the nape of his neck as she reached up for a kiss. As their lips met, he gently opened them with a soft swirl of his tongue. She smelled like lilies on a fresh spring morning with sweet feminine undertones, it was light yet intoxicating. His hands moved from the small of her back to cup her bottom. He pulled her close against him, and she gave in with a breathy sigh and a moan. _

_He wished he could have stayed in that memory for a little while longer, but his mind was working in overdrive trying to figure out his identity. That girl seemed to care for him quite a bit. Maybe she was his girlfriend, or at least Zack hoped she was his girlfriend. She knew his name was Zack. That's right, he was Zack! Like a flood overtaking a village, his memories started to pour in. He was Zack, the spiky-haired blond man was Cloud, and they were trapped in a lab as human experiments. They needed to escape, and he needed to make it back to the pretty flower girl--HIS girl--Aerith! Now that he knew his own identity, he started banging on the glass again. "Cloud, it's me Zack! Wake up buddy." _

_The blond-haired man hung lifeless in the green liquid, suspended in Mako like a fossilized creature in amber, never to return to life. _

_Cloud's inability to wake up just spurned Zack into trying even harder. Throwing his whole body up against the glass, he made an even bigger sound, but Cloud still showed no semblance of life. Zack was about to resume his frantic glass pounding when he noticed a tiny crack, a hairline fracture in the glass. It was quite miniscule, and he was certain he would not have seen it were it not for his Mako-enhanced vision. This inspired him to start smashing the cracked area of glass in the hope that it would eventually shatter. _

_With the ferocity of a mama bear trying to rescue her endangered cub, he pounded away at the crack. It wasn't long before his knuckles were bruised and bloody, damaged from the blunt impact of fist against glass. The pain would come later, he figured, but now he had to focus on getting them out of the lab. Ever so slowly, the crack started to widen and extend upwards. Now he started to throw his whole body up against the crack. He was determined to fight until either him or the glass gave out. After exhausting himself, the glass finally shattered with a high pitched crackle. He flew out of the tank with the outpouring Mako and found himself on the floor, limbs splayed out and head turned to the side. Unbeknownst to Zack, a silent alarm had been triggered by his breakout, and a group of Shinra guards would be there within minutes. _

_The glass dust and shards coated his body and cut into him like little daggers. "Shit, that was kind of messy," Zack groaned. He was drenched in Mako, which clung to his body and dripped onto the floor in sickening plops as he worked to pull himself up. He was about to brush himself off, but his palms were coated with glass too. Blood started seeping out of his wounds, but he couldn't do much about it now, so he focused on standing and walking over to his friend's tank. _

_In the Mako he was weightless, but in the thin air of Gaia, gravity was not kind and tried its best to pull him down. He couldn't remember the last time he bore weight on his limbs, and his legs were struggling to support him. Step by step he managed to stagger over to his friend's tank. He stumbled into the tank with a loud crash as he took his last step._

_The loud noise woke Cloud up, and he looked upon Zack with tired blue eyes, weary from carrying the heavy burden of the horrors inflicted upon him._

_Unable to contain his excitement, Zack exclaimed, "Hey Spike! It's me Zack."_

_Cloud stared out at Zack through half-lidded eyes glazed over in pain. Closing his heavy eyelids, he tried to go back to sleep._

_Zack started banging on Cloud's tube until he opened his eyes once again. Cloud acknowledged Zack's presence with indifference and looked at him with eyes that were blank, as though it was his first day of existence. _

_Zack struggled to speak against the tightness in his throat, and his voice came out as an impassioned plea, "Don't you remember me? I'm Zack, your friend." After all they'd been through together Zack didn't want to believe his friend had forgotten him. Not being one to give up, he decided he'd keep trying to jog Cloud's memory until he did remember. He carefully enunciated his name while pointing his index finger at himself. "ZACK."_

_The blonde man tried to mirror Zack's actions, but found that movement was much more difficult than it seemed. Zack waited patiently while the blond man struggled with his shaking arm. Eventually he managed to point to himself and say, "ZACK."_

_Zack shook his head in frustration. Pointing towards the glass he said, "CLOUD."_

_Once again, the blonde man copied Zack. With painstaking movements, he brought his index finger up to the glass and pointed towards Zack as he said, "CLOUD."_

_Zack muttered under his breath, "This is going to be harder than I thought." Then Zack decided to try something else, something a little bolder. He started emphatically pointing his finger at the glass towards his friend, repeating, "CLOUD, CLOUD, CLOUD, CLOUD. . . "_

_Finally, the blond man got the hint and started pointing at himself saying, "CLOUD, CLOUD, CLOUD, CLOUD." He ended with a question for Zack, "I am Cloud?" His voice was tentative and childish, almost like he feared punishment for daring to ask such a simple question._

"_Yes!" Zack said in fervent excitement with several sharp nods of his head. _

_After his self-discovery, a bright spark of life returned to Cloud's eyes. Cloud slowly pointed at Zack and formed the words, "Are you Zack?"_

_It had been so long since he heard his friend say his name, and it sounded so warm and beautiful. Zack was overcome with emotion and his eyes became moist with happiness. In isolation he had become so numb, but in the presence of his friend he felt his spirit coming back. Zack wanted to wipe his watery eyes, but was prevented from doing so by the glass covering his hands. Instead he let a tear roll down his face as he answered his friend, "Yes, I'm Zack. We're friends, remember?"_

_A soft smile came over Cloud's face, and his eyes twinkled with affection. "Yes, Zack is my friend, I remember."_

_Zack was ecstatic that Cloud finally remembered him. Most everything about their recent habitation of the Mako tubes was a blur, but Zack still had some horrid memories from before he blanked out. Every day since he could remember, Cloud would writhe in agony and scream as though his insides were being ripped out. Their tubes were only several feet apart, but they might as well have been worlds apart because his comforting words did little to soothe the internal demons that haunted Cloud and ripped his mind apart. All he wanted to do was wrap his arms around Cloud and tell him that everything was going to be all right, but he was trapped in a separate tube, so all he could do was watch as his friend slowly turned into a monster. _

_Eventually, Cloud screams withered into whimpers, which ultimately faded into silence. The quietness was even more alarming to Zack than the screaming. Not only did he not know what was going on in Cloud's head, but he was utterly alone with only his own voice to keep him company. That was until his own world went black. Then no voices existed, only an eerie silence that accompanied the alternating worlds of green and black. _

_Now that they were together, Zack desperately wanted to feel the comforting touch of his friend, so he pressed his palms into the glass and gave his friend a smile of reassurance. Cloud followed suit, carefully matching their hands up finger by finger across the thick glass that separated them. It was only a faint whisper of a touch, but it bridged the gap of loneliness between them. Their eyes locked in a tender glance, neither one wanting the moment to end for this was the closest contact they'd had in months. Zack's eyes were deep pools of blue filled with enough hope for both of them, while Cloud's eyes were filled with relief, for he wasn't alone anymore. _

"_Cloud," Zack whispered, his breath fogging up the glass. _

"_Zack," Cloud answered back with an urgent longing in his voice. _

_Cloud noticed the thin film of blood covering Zack's body. A worried expression came over his face as he asked, "Are you hurt?"_

_As much as he wanted to ignore the question, Zack couldn't help but feel pleased that his friend cared about him so. Playing the stoic hero, Zack said, "Yeah, I'm fine. Hey, I'm going to get you out of here. We're finally going to escape." Unfortunately, neither one of them knew how the Mako tubes worked. _

_As Zack walked around the tube searching for some sort of release apparatus, he was interrupted by a set of booming footsteps entering the room. "Stop or we'll shoot!" ordered a Shinra guard. Flanking him were four other guards, more than ready and willing to shoot. Despite the guard's resolve to remain calm, his heart was racing in his chest, and he was having trouble holding his gun steady because he was shaking. Zack's presence was intimidating under any circumstances. _

"_Hang on Cloud, I've got some business to take care of," Zack said with a smirk. Unfortunately, Zack had forgotten the simple fact that his full strength had yet to return. Being caged in that tank for months had allowed his super -enhanced muscles to atrophy. Just because he could walk didn't mean he could still jump up fifty feet in the air, that type of skill would take a few days to return._

_Zack charged towards the guards, his only weapon being his bloody glass-encrusted fists. The guards made good on their promise and immediately started firing. Usually he could dodge bullets with ease because his Mako-enhanced hearing allowed him to anticipate the bullet long before it reached him. His hearing was still adept, but as the barrage of bullets came he noticed that his movements weren't as quick and nimble as they used to be. As the bullets came straight at him, he dodged all four of them, narrowly missing the last one. _

_Four of them, he thought, wasn't there. . . his thoughts were cut off by the fifth bullet zooming towards him. He zagged to the right, but he wasn't quick enough and the bullet ripped into his thigh. "Damn!" he cried. However, it was only a minor distraction because he was too hyped up on Mako and adrenaline to really notice the pain at the moment. _

_With reloaded guns, the guards were able to shoot out a second round before Zack got to them. It was a cacophony of gun blasts as they all fired at different times, trying to catch Zack off guard once again, but he had learned from the last round of gunshots that jumping might be a better means of defense. He had to time it just right, so that he jumped before the first bullet and landed after the last bullet. As the first bullet sped towards him, he jumped up into the air, his foot just clearing the bullet. He anticipated a much higher jump, but he came down before the last one had been fired. Swiftly weaving out of its path, he managed to clear the last bullet. He was quickly closing the distance between him and the guards. _

_As Zack was dodging bullets, Cloud was pressed up against the glass, trying his best not to turn away. He was scared for his friend, and he just wanted the whole thing to be over. Every muscle in his body was screaming for him to go crouch down in the back of his tube and wait it out, it would have been easier. Maybe he would have done something like that years ago, but things were different now. They both needed each other to get out of this place, but being stuck in a tube limited his ability to help his friend. A diversion, Cloud thought. If he could convince the guards that he was in trouble then maybe it would distract them enough so that Zack could get the upper hand. Cloud wasn't sure if it would work, but he didn't have a lot of options at that point, so he did the only thing he could think of at the moment, he faked a seizure. _

_Throwing his limbs around in a spastic manner, he accidentally hit his head on the tube with a loud thump. As he fell to the ground, he kept up the jerking seizure-like movements. It wasn't as hard as he thought it was going to be, but he definitely could have done without the head bump. There was a certain rhythm to the aberrant movements, but it was taxing on his body. He'd be lucky if he didn't bite his tongue off or get whiplash from the whole thing. _

_Alerted by the loud thump, one of the guards called out to another one, "Quick, call Hojo! Something's wrong with the blond specimen!" One of the guards quickly left the room in search of the scientist, Hojo._

_Zack thought the man was bluffing at first, using a dirty trick to throw off his concentration, but the look of horror on his face was too real. As he turned around, he was met by the sight of his friend jerking around like he was possessed by a demon. "Cloud!" he called out. Without thinking, he started to run towards his friend, and that lapse of concentration was all it took for the four remaining guards to pump their bullets into him. His body reacted before his mind and tried to keep running as he was falling. This resulted in him flying across the room and landing hard on his stomach, only a few feet from Cloud's tube. Summoning the energy deep from within, he stood up and lurched forward. When he had finally made it to Cloud's tank, he leaned on it for support, and called out to his friend. His voice was hoarse and weak as he asked, "Spike, you okay?"_

_Cloud was reluctant to stop his seizing lest he be suspected of faking, but Zack sounded so desperate and hurt. He'd just assumed Zack had dodged the remaining bullets, but he couldn't ignore him now. Easing himself out of the jerking movements, he turned to see Zack leaning on his tube, veiled in a thick crimson coat of blood. "Zack!" Cloud screamed in a shrill voice of horror. _

_He quickly scrambled from his position on the ground to stand up. As he met Zack's gaze, he noticed that his lopsided smile was still there, but his glowing blue eyes flickered in and out, like a light that refused to die. With bloody palms pressed weakly against the glass, Zack made a silent request for comfort, to feel the touch of his friend once again. Lining his fingers up with Zack's, Cloud pressed his hands up against the glass. Cloud wanted to say something reassuring to his friend, something that would make things better, but all that came out was a scared and trembling voice. "Zack, don't go."_

_Zack went to open his mouth, but his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he fell to the ground as his legs gave out. Struggling to keep his eyes open, Zack looked towards Cloud and said in a faint voice, "I'm tired Spikey. . . "_

_Panic mixed with sorrow as Cloud started to cry. "Zack, wake up! C'mon, don't leave me alone here! I'm sorry I was just trying to help!" He watched in dismay as Zack lay in a crumpled heap, bleeding out onto the floor. _

"_Do something!" Cloud screamed to the guards as he pounded on the glass of his tank. "You can't just leave him there!" The guards seemed unaffected by his pleas and waited for Hojo's command like mindless sheep._

_Hojo entered the room in a brisk business-like manner as though he still had everything under control. Immediately he began barking orders at the guards. "You there, go get the surgeon and prep Specimen 520 for surgery." He gave a disapproving shake of the head, "You bungling fools! You're not supposed to kill the specimens! I'll have your heads if this one doesn't survive! Do you know how long it's taken me to acquire a 1__st__ Class SOLDIER?"_

_One of the guards said in defense of their attack, "But sir, he was. . . " Hojo cut him off with his hand before he could finish. In a demeaning voice Hojo said, "I don't care if he kills the whole lot of you. You don't kill the specimens." Turning to the rest of the guards he ordered, "Hurry, get some towels and apply some heavy pressure on his wounds until the medics get here."_

_The guards acknowledged Hojo with bowed heads and went about finding towels to place over Zack's wounds. _

_Hojo then turned his attention to Cloud, and watched him with the same amusement that one would watch a caged animal doing a trick. "Isn't that sweet," Hojo cooed to Cloud in sarcasm. "You seem to care about Specimen 520 here. Don't worry, I won't let your friend die. He's far too valuable to me."_

_Cloud was too mad to be scared at the moment. He puffed up his chest and threw a punch at the glass, his weak fist shaking violently from the sudden force. _

_Hojo threw back his head and cackled in response. "Even after all this time in the lab you still have so much to learn little one." His thin lips twisted into a crooked smile as he continued, "My sources tell me you were having some sort of seizure." Pausing for a moment, his eyes narrowed at Cloud as he said, "I can't believe I didn't think of examining the effects of Mako on your brain before, but now that you've brought it to my attention, I think it's a great idea."_

_With a shudder, Cloud recoiled in horror and backed away from the edge of his tube. Cloud knew that Hojo was a hands-on sort of learner, so when he said 'brain examination' it most likely meant the top half of his skull was coming off. "You sick fuck!" Cloud growled in the most menacing voice he could muster. He considered telling Hojo that the seizure a ruse, but he doubted Hojo would believe him. People believed what they wanted to believe no matter how rational the explanation was. _

_Flashing Cloud a vicious smirk, Hojo asked, "Now, is that any way to treat your creator?" Not giving Cloud time to answer, Hojo continued, "I have given you the abilities of a superhero, and ingratitude is how you repay me." His voice turned sinister once again, dark and commanding. "Listen boy, you and that foolish friend of yours have a lot to learn around here. Don't think this escape attempt will go by unnoticed. Every action has a reaction, and that explosive escape attempt deserves quite the punishment." _

_Just then the nurses came in with a stretcher and laid it down beside Zack. With the help of the guards, they lifted Zack's body onto the stretcher, and started to carry him away. Zack reached out a hand towards Cloud, as if to comfort him, to say that everything would be okay. Their eyes met in a lingering glance before they carried Zack far, far, away. Cloud felt his mouth open, but no sound came out. At the moment he was too overwhelmed with losing his friend, losing the only hope he ever had in this gods forsaken hell-hole. _

_Hojo walked away with the nurses, accompanying Zack to the medical room of the building. Throwing his head over his shoulder, he noticed Cloud looking longingly at his friend. It was sickening, he thought, the way they depended on each other. Those two were much harder to break then he initially thought. Their transformation would never be complete as long as they still held onto each other. He would be left with two failures, and he never failed! He needed to say something quick to antagonize the boy. With a malicious scoff he said, "Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about you. I'll be back for your brain procedure later."_

"_Fuck you!" snarled Cloud, the venom dripping from his voice._

_In response, Hojo threw him an insidious smirk. Excellent, Hojo thought, he'd managed to switch the boy's thoughts over to anger, which was infinitely easier to deal with than love._

_Now that everyone was out of the room, Cloud didn't feel the need to hold back his emotions. The sheer weight of his fear and sorrow brought him to his knees, and he broke into sobs. Banging his fist softly against the glass, his voice came out in angry whisper, "Fuck you Hojo, fuck you. . . "_

_After a while, he calmed down enough to ruminate about the situation. Zack was wrong because everything was not going to be okay. Just minutes ago Zack had promised Cloud the world, yet once again he failed to deliver. A small part of him wanted to hate his friend for raising his hopes once again. It just hurt so damn bad every time he crashed from such a high, but he knew it wasn't Zack's fault. To hate Zack for trying to escape would be to hate a bird for flying, it was just something that was an instinctual part of his nature. _

_It was Hojo that he hated. It was Hojo that did this to him, that took Zack away from him, and raised Sephiroth, the demon that would one day attempt to destroy them all. It was Hojo that tortured them, and experimented on them like they were nothing more than lab rats. It was Hojo that was going to come back, have the guards strap him down, and slice his head open. Everything that was bad in his life could be traced back to Hojo. _

_He didn't know whether he should cry because fate was so cruel, or laugh because he was the center of some sick cosmic joke. Slowly, Cloud could feel himself breaking down, so many emotions and only one mouth to vocalize it all. With the disappearance of Zack, he had nothing left to hold onto. No honor or dreams, just shame and a cold and cruel reality. He did the only thing that he could do at that point, he screamed._

~*~*~*~*~

Zack's arms were locked around Cloud, squeezing him defensively. His head was buried deep in the crook of Cloud's shoulder because he was trying to hide from the explosion of painful memories raining on him from above.

Lilleas' frantically shook Zack, trying to get his attention. "Zack, you have to help! Cloud's screaming and it's drawing attention."

A crowd had started to gather, watching the scene with morbid curiosity. The image the duo made was more like a pair of war refugees than grocery store shoppers. The raven-haired man looked as though he was taking shelter in his friend while under bombardment, hiding from the falling sky that dared to destroy them. The blond man was screaming as though he already knew their grisly fate, and it had driven him to the point of insanity.

The crowd didn't know what to make of the situation, so they stayed, hoping for a new development that would reveal more information.

Now Lilleas was really starting to panic as she could feel their gaze burning into her. Her hopelessness manifested as tears streaming down her cheeks. "Zack, c'mon, you have to wake up!"

Snapping out of his trance, Zack looked around with surprise to find that a crowd had gathered. The last thing he remembered was green gelatin. . . Now that he was awake, he noticed a sea of watchful eyes staring directly at him and Cloud, effectively pinning them in place. That's when he realized they were back in reality and the screaming noise was coming from Cloud.

He knew that he had to pick his words wisely because he was being watched from all sides. In a loud and firm voice, Zack said, "Hey buddy, there's no more green gelatin. We're back in the grocery store. I'm here with you." In an effort to reassure Cloud of his presence, he squeezed him even tighter. "It's okay, I'm here. No one is going to tear us apart. I'm not going to let them." Even though his voice was loud and commanding, there was only affection and comfort within it.

Zack's soothing voice reached down to the depths of Cloud soul and pulled him back into reality. Cloud wasn't sure where they were exactly, but he knew they weren't in the lab. In one moment his friend had been taken away, and in the next Zack had returned. It was too much for Cloud to bear. His emotions got the best of him, and he started to cry. He didn't care who was watching. There was a time to be macho and brave, and then there was a time to let the walls down.

Zack pressed Cloud gently into his chest and whispered words of reassurance to him until he calmed down. He'd been too occupied with Cloud to notice the subsequent reactions of the crowd. Most of them had disbanded when the screaming stopped, but there were still a few stragglers left behind. Zack felt that he didn't owe them an explanation, so he just ignored them until the scene became boring enough that they lost interest and left.

Lilleas was still quite shaken, so Zack motioned her over and pulled her into a hug. "Hey it's going to be okay." While he spoke words of comfort, his voice held traces of fear and sorrow.

She knew that he was trying though, so she relaxed into his strong embrace. "Yeah," she managed to choke out, "I guess so."

With a gentle release he said, "Well I guess it's time to buy this stuff and go home." Lilleas stepped back and grabbed her own cart. She followed behind him as he grabbed his 'Cloud cart' and started pushing it towards the cash register. All of a sudden, he came to a stop, but Lilleas didn't notice and accidentally rammed her cart into his Achille's tendon.

He let out a small grunt of pain before turning around to face her. Dragging his hand down his face, he released a sigh that was large enough to encompass all other sighs. His voice was firm, but without malice as he issued the order, "No more green gelatin, ever."

She gave a silent head nod before Zack turned around and preceded to the nearest cash register. Just as he expected, the whole store seemed to stare in his direction as he emerged from the baby food aisle. A lesser man would have given into the pressure, but Zack straightened his spine and carried on as if he wasn't being scrutinized by a large crowd. Lilleas couldn't help herself though, and she stared down anyone that even glanced in their direction. Most everyone turned away once they'd been caught staring, except for the children, they continued to stare.

"Here Lilleas, let's change carts," Zack said, "You wait over there with Spike, and I'll purchase the food."

She did as she was told and waited on the other side of the cash register with Cloud. Looking down at his hands, she noticed his knuckles were white from gripping the donut bag tightly. She had been so worried about herself that she had forgotten about how scared Cloud was. She knew that her voice lacked the calming effect that Cloud desired, so without speaking, she came around and held his tense fists while waiting for Zack. It was the least she could do for him.

Zack was done before she knew it, and saw her holding Cloud's hands. "Is he still scared?"

"I think so."

"Here, I'll put the bags back in the cart, and we'll get situated outside." After exiting the store, they grabbed the grocery bags and Cloud and walked towards the back of the store, a more private spot. Zack didn't feel the need to draw any more attention than he already had today, though he realized that might be hard to do.

Setting the grocery bags on the ground, they sat down against the building. Zack noticed that Cloud still had the donut bag clutched tightly in his hands. "Hey buddy, thanks for taking care of the donuts. Here, let me take these for you," Zack said as he tried to wrest the bag from Cloud's death grip. Cloud wasn't letting go so Zack gave the bag a quick yank. The donut bag gave with a rip, and Cloud fell back from the sudden force, but he was still holding onto the top of the torn donut bag. Zack realized that Cloud was either still tense from the green gelatin trauma, or he was taking his job as donut boy too seriously.

Pulling Cloud into a tender hug Zack said, "Hey, it's going to be okay. We're together right?"

Cloud gave a soft grunt of affirmation and started to relax. Slowly, his clenched fists uncurled, and the color returned to his blanched knuckles.

Since Cloud was going to have to walk home, Zack figured it was best to get moving while his friend was still riding on the highs of anxiety. "Spike, do you think you can walk home? I'm going to need you to do that so that I can carry the groceries." There really wasn't another option, but Zack posed the question to Cloud anyway. He knew that his friend liked to be given responsibilities because it gave him a sense of purpose.

As Zack helped Cloud stand up against the wall, his blanket fell down around his ankles. Zack bent down quickly, and tied the blanket around his friend like a cape. "There," Zack said taking a step back to admire his ingenuity, "that should work. Why if I didn't know better I'd say you look like a superhero."

In an attempt to be funny Lilleas blurted out, "A superhero of what, dreamworld?" It came out sounding much more insensitive than intended, and she was immediately regretful.

"Give him a break," Zack quipped dryly.

Walking over to Cloud, she hugged him around his waist. "I'm sorry Cloud. I didn't mean it. I just meant to be funny." Looking up at him with adoration she said, "You can always be my hero."

Zack just rolled his eyes. "I swear Lilleas, you're almost more exhausting than Cloud."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means, you can help me arrange these grocery bags."

With a huff, she headed over to help Zack. Zack loaded his backpack with the heaviest stuff, gave the light bags to Lilleas, and reserved all of the leftover heavy bags for himself. Lilleas help position Zack so that he had Cloud supported on one shoulder, and the grocery bags hanging off of the other.

"Well, it looks like we're ready to go," Zack said glancing at both Cloud and Lilleas.

Up above them, the sun bowed down gracefully as the moon ascended into the sky. There was about an hour or two of daylight still available, so they walked back as fast as Cloud could manage. Zack could only hope that the grocery store incident would be the peak of their troubles for the day.

**Author's Note:** I wanted to thank my wonderful beta **Blue Jae** for thoroughly going over the flashback! I told her it was going to be about 1,000 words and then I sent her something that was 4,500 words. Lol, she was a good sport about it though ^_^ I also wanted to thank **Mint** for helping me with a ton of story details! If it weren't for her, Zack might have ended up pushing a grocery cart home XD Lol. Sorry I didn't get to the bath scene. . .I won't mention names, but I know some of you were looking forward to it ;) Lol, I thought it would happen but that flashback wound up being way longer than I anticipated. Condensed milk was actually used as a war ration in the American Civil War. It's got about 1,300 calories in that little can. I don't think it's used as a modern day war ration because they probably have other food. **Cookiecat**, you might know about this, no?

While sawing off the top of Cloud's head sounds really gory, that's what they do for brain surgery. They numb the area, and saw off the top of your skull, well only the part that they need. You are awake during brain surgery, or at least that's how I understand it. Supposedly your brain doesn't feel pain. Eeeeesh, I was reminded of this when my mom told me she was watching a special on epileptic children. Anyway, one of the children needed brain surgery to correct the seizures, so they had his skull off and they were stimulating different parts of his brain and asking him questions. My mom said it looked like torture. Actually a lot of medical stuff, even though it's done to save a patient's life, could be considered torture. I imagine Hojo wouldn't think anything of it. However, I disagree with some people's portrayal of him that he outright tortures them. I mean if they escape, well then he would punish/torture them, but operations without anesthetic just for fun? I don't know. . . that makes it sound like a bad horror movie. There will be more lab scenes. In fact I should comment that it was Jaydee Grey's "Reduced to Specimens," that inspired me to write. It's a really good story, but if you're squeamish I wouldn't recommend it. I really love the lab scenes because I think it's one of the most interesting parts of the story. Although, for those that haven't played the video game they don't go into any of this. Torture is just implied, but it's not actually shown. Maybe I'll go into the game evidence sometime that supports this notion. Thanks again for the reviews!


	16. Chapter 16

**Rating M:** I'm rating this chapter M because of the bath scene. It has some graphic sexual content, but not that graphic. I'm not sure what people consider graphic. No yaoi. Zack is washing Cloud, but that's not the sexual situation XD If I haven't made that clear yet, this story doesn't have any yaoi in it. The only romance is between Zack and Aerith.

**Chapter 16**

Everything seemed to be going fine, and the trio had almost made it home when the Fates decided to stir things up. From their position in the netherworld, they controlled everyone's fate and ultimate destiny. They were a meddlesome bunch, and they took much delight in interfering in the lives of mortals. Unfortunately, Zack and Cloud had been targeted as just another one of their games. The Fates had enough of death for the day and were in the mood for something small this time, nothing too much, just a trifle annoyance. They set to work with a cackle, spinning Cloud's thread of life on their spindle, adding in a meddlesome knot where there shouldn't have been one. Now that the task was done, his fate was set to take a different turn for the day. All they had to do now was watch. . .

~*~*~*~*~

As they were walking along the path towards their motel, Cloud suddenly slowed, his feet dragging on the ground. Zack interpreted it as exhaustion, so he tried to give Cloud some encouraging words. "Come on buddy we're almost there. Do you think you can make it?"

Cloud kept his head down and gave a barely audible grunt.

Lilleas turned to Zack and asked in anticipation, "What'd he say?"

With a sigh Zack replied, "He said he's tired but he thinks he can make it."

Lilleas peeked around Zack to find Cloud heavily slumped over with his chin to his chest. "I don't know," she said with a shake of her head, "he doesn't look too good."

"Cloud said he's okay," Zack replied without looking over at his friend. The listless image of his friend would only make him want to stop, so he kept his focus on the ground. "Pick up your bags Lilleas, we're going to try to make it. We're only like ten minutes from home."

"Okay," she said in slight disbelief. She wanted to protest, but she thought she heard a bit of a growl coming from Zack, so she quickly picked up her bags and resumed walking.

It was only about a minute or two later when Zack felt a strong tug on his arm from Cloud. Like a vehicle running out of gas, Cloud took a few more sputtering lurches forward before the tank ran dry. He suddenly collapsed, pulling Zack with him as he fell down towards the ground. Zack reflexively tightened his hold around Cloud's arm and put a leg out in front to stabilize himself. Luckily, he managed to keep Cloud from falling on his face as he met the ground.

Dropping the grocery bags, he came over to Cloud, who was lying on his side with limbs askew. From a crouched position he reached out a hand and gently shook his friend. "Hey Spike, are you okay?"

There was no response. Instead, Cloud stared out into the distance with clear glassy eyes.

Zack reached a hand over to Cloud's wrist to check his pulse. It was slow and steady, a reassuring indicator that he was still alive. As Zack pulled back, Cloud's eyes rolled to the back of his head and his eyelids fluttered violently.

Fear ripped the words from Zack's mouth, "Oh shit." He stood up and took a large step back, tucking Lilleas behind him. "Stay back Lilleas, he's having a seizure."

Within an instant he became a whirlwind of arms, legs, hands, and head. His limbs went swirling into the air, thrashing around violently in a flurry of spasms. After about a minute, he came crashing down, down, down into the ground, and it was over just as soon as it had started.

Zack ran over to his friend, crouched down and brushed the hair out of his face. With a soft voice he said, "It's over now, you're going to be okay." With a sigh he added, "You know, you don't always have to be a tough guy. "

Unsure of the situation, Lilleas approached them with hesitation. "Zack? You sure he's going to be okay? He just had a seizure."

From behind, she could see Zack's back ripple with tension as he spoke, "Yeah, he's had this before. It's a reaction to the withdrawal. . . " He shut his mouth to stop the words from coming out. After a pause, he looked over at her with tired eyes and said in a wavering voice, "He's just very sick, that's all. We need to get home soon." Taking a deep breath he regained his composure. Using a firm voice he ordered, "Lilleas, pick up your bags. It's time to go."

She didn't feel like getting into an argument, so she picked up the bags and waited for Zack.

It wasn't until he went to pick up the grocery bags that he noticed his fists were tightly clenched. This incident had stressed him out more than he was willing to admit. He hadn't figured out what Cloud's seizures meant, but this was the second one he'd had since they left the lab, which meant it was more than a fluke. He realized it probably had something to do with Cloud's mako addiction and sudden withdrawal, which meant he was inevitably going to have another one. Then again, it might also have something to do with the Jenova cells. Unfortunately, the only person who knew wasn't speaking.

Zack turned to look at his friend, so fragile and helpless against the dark asphalt. Cloud looked like a fallen angel that the gods had turned asunder and cast out of the heavens. Wings torn and tattered, he fell from the sky with only the concrete to break his fall. Once he could fly and soar the universe, but now he's broken and can't even walk. Forsaken by the gods, he was condemned to live out the rest of his life in misery.

Closing heavy eyelids, he let out a pained whimper as Zack picked him up. "C'mon Spike, we're going home." It was just then that he noticed a sudden wetness on one of his arms. Looking down at Cloud he found a large wet spot on the front of his pants. He didn't have the heart to be disgusted because he knew it wasn't Cloud's fault for wetting himself during the seizure. Giving his friend a half-smile of sympathy he said, "Don't worry Spike, you'll feel better after you get a bath."

Lilleas perked up at the mention Cloud taking a bath. "Oh! I'll help," she enthusiastically volunteered.

Zack rolled his eyes as he said, "No Lilleas, he doesn't need his fan club watching him bathe."

"Oh. . . " she said, quickly turning her face before Zack could see her blush. However, that didn't stop her from trying again. "Wait, you let me help last time. Why can't I help this time? I'm a big help," she added with a hopeful smile.

Zack couldn't help but let out a small chuckle at her youthful enthusiasm. Well that and her raging female hormones. He didn't have a sister, but he figured if girls were anything like guys, Lilleas was at that age where guys seemed to matter. "The answer is still no, but. . . "

She cut him off before he could finish, "Yeah?"

"You can help me give him his medicine. It's about time for another dose," Zack continued.

"Well, okay. . ." she said, her voice rich with disappointment. "Maybe next time I can help with his bath?"

He answered her question with a knowing glare, and she turned away with embarrassment. She could feel the heat rising from within her bosom and shading her face an even darker shade of pink.

They continued on their path to the motel, an awkward silence settling between them. Zack finally spoke to break the tension. "Don't worry," he said in a reassuring voice, "we were all there once."

"Really?" she asked in disbelief. "Well, how about you?"

His face lit up with a bright smile, and his eyes twinkled as he responded, "Me? Well, I was always a stud."

"I can't believe I actually took you seriously," she huffed.

"What? I am serious. With these eyes and this smile, how could I be joking?"

"That's it," she said in annoyance, "I'm walking home by myself. Everything is a joke to you." She picked up her speed, making a point of ignoring him as she passed.

"I'll see ya soon," he called after her. When she was out of hearing distance, he said to Cloud, "I think we should let her win this time. She's had a hard day." He paused as if Cloud was answering him. "Yeah, I know, _women_," he said in exaggerated frustration. "Damned if I'll ever understand them either Spike."

While walking back, a gentle breeze wafted through the trees, rustling the branches against each other. The soft whisper of leaves dancing in the wind soothed his spirit. Enough for him contemplate the given situation. Thinking aloud he said, "You know, sometimes I wonder if someone up there has it out for us Spiky. It just seems like every time things are going good something bad happens." His voice took on a dramatic tone as the anger started to break through his voice, "If someone up there is playing with us, I won't let them win." He gripped Cloud tight to his chest, looked up towards the sky and cried, "I'm talking to you up there! We're going to make it, whether you like it or not. Right Spike?" That's when he looked down and noticed how tight his hold on Cloud was. As he loosened his grip, Cloud took in a sharp gasp of air. With a small smile of embarrassment he said, "Ooops, sorry about that buddy. Guess I forgot my own strength."

~*~*~*~*~

Approaching the motel, they found Lilleas outside, leaning against the door with the bags down on the ground. "Finally," she said with an exaggerated sigh.

"Finally? What you were here like a whole thirty seconds before us. I saw you," he said with a cocky smile. "Anyway, could you reach in my pocket and grab the key," he said to Lilleas. "I don't think Cloud can stand on his feet right now."

Approaching him with reluctance she asked, "Um, you mean your pants pocket?"

"Yes, my pants pocket."

As she went to reach in, her hand paused right above his pocket, as if there was an invisible barrier barring the entrance. She hadn't been that close to Zack before and the thought of reaching down into his pocket struck her as vulgar.

"For heaven's sake Lilleas, just reach down in my pants and pull it out."

Lilleas raised a hand over her lips to stifle a giggle.

"Oh Gaia," Zack said rolling his eyes, "you know that's not what I meant." The exhaustion came through in his voice as he asked, "Could you please just do what I asked?"

Pushing modesty aside, she swallowed her concerns and pulled out the key. Opening the door, she let Zack and Cloud in first before she carried the rest of the bags into the room.

Carefully balancing Cloud on his knee, Zack opened up the bathroom door with his other arm. Setting him down against the wall Zack said, "Alright buddy, you just stay there and I'll get you your medicine."

After washing the urine off his arms, he clapped his hands together and said, "Alright, we just need to give him his medicine and then it's bath time. Lilleas, why don't you get the stuff together for me so that I can prepare his medicine."

With a quick nod, she gathered all of the materials together and brought them to Zack. He quickly ground up the pill, dissolved it in the water bottle, and coaxed Cloud into drinking it. Then he got some water for himself, sat down on the edge of the tub and drank it. It was his first real break of the day, and now that he was sitting down, the achiness was starting to settle in his joints. He was exhausted, and all he really wanted to do was go lie down and take a nap. But as Cloud sat propped up against the bathroom wall, soaked in his own urine, Zack knew it couldn't wait any longer. There was no way around it, Cloud needed a bath, and he needed it now. So he turned on the water, adjusting the knobs until the water coming out of the spigot was very warm. "How warm do you like it Spike?" He reached out a hand to his unresponsive friend ruffled his hair. "Yeah, I like it really warm too."

Standing back with fists at his hips he said, "Well, I guess it's time to get you undressed." With a sigh, he got to work removing Cloud's clothes, which he threw in a heap on the floor. After removing his boxers, he held them out with his thumb and forefinger and eyed them with a grimace. "You know what, I think I'm gonna' throw these out and get some new ones for you tomorrow. Gaia only knows the last time Hojo gave us new underwear." He quickly repressed a shudder before picking Cloud up and gently lowering him into the tub.

As he entered the water, Cloud winced as the painful heat engulfed him, setting his nerves on fire. Once he was submerged, it didn't take long for his body to adapt to the heat, and suddenly it felt warm and comforting, like a sunny day at the beach. Not that he'd ever been, but he imagined it must have felt something like this. His muscle fibers uncoiled, releasing the tension from his body, and for once he felt at ease. The warm liquid surrounding him felt so hot and wet, it was more than just nice—it felt arousing. It wasn't long before he began to indulge in wanton thoughts. Any female would have done for this purpose, but Tifa was the first one that came to mind. Thoughts of _hotwetTifa_ filled his mind and slowly began to coax his flaccid penis to life.

"Wait right here," Zack ordered, "I'm going to go get a washcloth." He hurried off, and came back with not only a washcloth, but a bar of soap and some shampoo. Pouring some of the shampoo into the water, he moved Cloud's legs to the side and swirled it around. "This should take care of. . ." he paused thinking of a way to phrase it before he settled on saying, "um, yeah, well you know what I mean Spike."

"Here," Zack said reaching under Cloud arms and pulling him up with a grunt, "I'm going to need you to sit up." Lathering up the washcloth, he started spreading suds on Cloud's muscular shoulder and arm. "You like that, huh?" Zack asked, happy to see a smile on Cloud's face. Reaching across Cloud's chest, he quickly washed the other arm and shoulder.

Then Zack started with the idle chatter that he often used to fill the silence. "I can't say that I've ever given anyone a bath before. I've taken plenty though. Sorry we don't have any tub toys," he finished with a teasing smirk. He ran the washcloth around and inside Cloud's ear, earning him a moan of disapproval. "Stop squirming Spike," Zack said as he tried to hold down his friend with the other arm, "you're making this difficult." Water sloshed all over the side of the tub and onto Zack before he finished washing Cloud's face. With a sigh he said, "Nothing's ever easy with you, is it?" He wanted to frown, but instead he felt a slight smile tug at the corners of his lips. His smile became brighter as he noticed the unusually large smile enveloping Cloud's face. "What are you smiling about Spiky?"

Cloud let out a low raspy mumble, "Ugggghhhnnnaaa."

Zack let out a chuckle before trying his best to imitate Cloud's mumble. "Well this 'Ugggghhhhnnnaaaa,' must be very interesting. Maybe it's a girl, huh?" Giving Cloud a playful punch to the shoulder he said, "Who's the lucky lady?" Zack bounced the heel of his hand against his forehead in a gesture of sarcasm. "How could I forget, her name is 'Uggghhhhnnnnaaaa.' Well, I'll have to meet her someday and see if she's good enough for my Spiky. I'm not going to give you away to just any girl." He finished the statement with a small smile, reflecting on the absurdity of the present situation. Cloud was slowly turning him into a mother hen.

Taking the washcloth, Zack dipped it into the water before going over Cloud's finely sculpted pectoral muscles. Tracing circles over his chest, Zack worked the lather down Cloud's firm abdomen. He paused at his navel when he saw something sticking out of the water. It took him a few seconds before he realized it was the tip of Cloud's prominent erection. With a hearty chuckle he leaned back and said, "So that's what you were smiling about. Hang in there buddy, I'm almost done."

Unfortunately for Zack, Cloud couldn't wait. The feeling of _hotwetTifa_ had increased to a feverish intensity, and the pressure in his groin was bordering on painful.

Reaching the washcloth into the water, Zack went to rinse off his friend's torso when Cloud started thrusting his hips upwards. Zack quickly raised his hands in surprise, accidentally dropping the washcloth in the tub. "Whoa there Spike, I am definitely not your girlfriend! That goes waaaay beyond my call of duty."

As Zack stood up, he turned away from the tub, his cheeks blushing an obvious shade of pink. Slicking his hair back with a wet hand, he looked down in embarrassment as he said, "Why don't I give you some alone time so you can, uh. . . " his voice caught in the back of his throat as he continued, "take care of things." As he opened the door, he shook his head and muttered under his breath, "Dear Gaia, the poor boy can't even chew, but he can still do _that_. There you have it world, the wonders of Mako."

He shut the door quietly and sank against it to a sitting position. He brought his legs up to his chest and buried his weary head in his knees.

The footsteps outside the door peaked Lilleas' attention, so she crawled down to the end of the bed to investigate. Upon finding Zack she threw him a casual greeting, "Hey."

"Hey," Zack replied, lifting his head just enough so that she could hear him.

"What's up?"

Sensing that this was going to be a long conversation, Zack sat up straight and answered. "Not much."

"Why aren't you in there with Cloud?" she asked, searching his face for an answer.

"Oh _him_? He wanted to be alone for a while."

"You aren't afraid of him drowning?"

Zack scoffed, "Drowning is the least of his problems right now."

"Oh, well. . . " she was going to ask if she could sit next to him, but she realized mid-sentence that she hadn't apologized to him yet. "Sorry about earlier."

"Ah, it's okay," he said in his usual care-free tone. Even if she hadn't apologized, he had already forgiven her earlier. Given the traumatic event that happened earlier in the day, he couldn't fault her for being in a bad mood.

"Can I sit by you?"

"Yeah sure, do whatever you want," Zack said dismissively before burying his head in his knees once more.

She came over and sat next to him, asking, "What are you doing?"

Talking into his knees he mumbled, "Nothing."

With a small childish smile she said, "Oh, well then I'll do nothing with you."

This earned her a light laugh from Zack.

After a while, Lilleas closed her eyes to join Zack in slumber. As she was drifting off, a noise suddenly startled her, and she tensed with alarm. "Huh, what was that?" she asked looking around.

By now she had gotten Zack's attention, though he had just woken up from a light sleep. "Hmmm," he said groggily with half-lidded eyes, "what was what?"

The noise came again, a soft moan that almost bordered on pain.

"That!" she cried.

With his Mako-enhanced hearing, he immediately recognized the sound as coming from Cloud. He heard the sound again and broke out into a chuckle.

She was slightly annoyed that he wasn't taking this situation seriously. "What? What's so funny?" she asked.

"It's just Cloud," Zack said, dismissing her with his hand. He went back to resting on his knees while Lilleas put her ear up against the door.

Shaking him awake, she said with worry, "It sounds like he's hurt. Aren't you going to do something?"

"Do something?" Zack asked incredulously before he broke out into another laugh. "Don't worry Lilleas, he's definitely not hurt."

"Are you sure? I really think he's hurt. Can't you just let me go in there and check," she said, her voice growing more panicked.

"Trust me Lilleas, he's not hurt." She reached up to grab the door handle, but his arm shot up before she could get to it. "I can't let you in," Zack said, his tone growing more serious.

"Please? I'm just really worried about him," she pleaded.

Staring her down with blue eyes of steel, he said, "I said, _no_."

She gave a pained whimper as she backed down from his gaze and focused on the carpet in front of her. Aimlessly picking at the carpet fibers, she came up with an idea that might get her into the bathroom. While Zack wasn't looking, she reached an arm up and tickled his armpit.

Unfortunately, Zack had never been trained against tickling. It wasn't a tactic that the enemy used often, or ever for that matter. The strange tickling sensation made him curl up and momentarily relax his grip on the door handle. She used the opportunity to her advantage by pressing down on the door handle, and throwing her weight against the door. She let out a yelp of pain as she fell on the floor. Quickly pulling herself up, she walked over to the tub, frozen in place by what she saw.

Zack came in after her only to find her dumbstruck and white as a ghost. With a sigh he said, "Alright Lilleas, peep show's over." He tried to drag her away, but she was so firmly grounded in place that he ended up carrying her out of the bathroom. After setting her on the bed, he nudged her, "Hey, you okay. You look like you've seen a monster or something."

She blinked once, twice, slowly clearing the image from her mind before speaking. "No, I didn't see a monster, or at least that's not what I would call it."

This prompted a hearty chuckle from Zack, "Well, I told you not to go in there." Bending over to face her at eye level, he said with a touch of annoyance, "Maybe next time you should listen to me." He refrained from berating her any further because he figured she had already learned her lesson.

Looking up at him with eyes wide as saucers, she asked with slight disgust, "Is that what _it_ really looks like?"

"What? Oh, you mean. . . " he coughed, trying to clear his throat. He started again, but the words seemed to trip over his tongue on the way out. "Lilleas, what you saw in there can be a beautiful thing in the right situation. Look, ummm. . . " He was scrambling for the right words to use when he decided to try a new approach. With a sigh he began, "So when a man and a woman love each other. . ."

Lilleas cut him off with a groan, "I know all of that. I mean I know what I saw. I'd just never _seen _it before."

Zack swung his arms and let out a big breath of air, "Oh Gaia, well that's a relief. For a minute there I thought we were going to have a very awkward conversation." Under his breath he muttered, "Not that this isn't awkward."

Lilleas picked up on his mumbling, "What was that?"

"Huh? Oh nothing," Zack replied with a sheepish smile. Rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment he said, "So, I'm uh, just going to wait till he's done in there, and then I'm going to finish up his bath. Why don't you watch some TV to get your mind off things."

With an affirmative head nod, she eagerly reached for the remote and clicked on the TV.

Zack went back to his previous position, sitting by the door, until the sounds from within the bathroom had calmed. Then he grabbed a clean bathrobe that the motel had provided and went in to finish Cloud's bath.

After getting another washcloth, Zack crouched down by the tub, reached out a hand and ruffled his friend's hair. "I think you've had enough fun in here for today. How about we finish this bath?"

Cloud just smiled in response, a sweet smile that emphasized his boyish good looks. At the moment he looked more like a teenager than a grown adult. Briefly, it reminded Zack of the Cloud he knew before Nibelheim. He quickly brushed the thought away, but the thick lump in his throat was still there.

Zack quickly scrubbed the rest of his friend down and dried him off before wrapping the bathrobe around him. "There we go," Zack said as he tied the waistband tight, "we don't want anything slipping out." As Zack picked him up, Cloud melted into his arms, and rested his head against Zack's chest. Upon stepping out of the bathroom, Zack already found the covers pulled back on the bed.

Lilleas looked at him and smiled. "I like him much better like that," she said.

"Good. Well let's keep it that way," he responded.

"Alright Spike, why don't we take a nap before we fix up that nasty gash on your head." After making sure his friend was settled, Zack took off his SOLDIER gear and hopped into bed. It wasn't long before the gaping maw of slumber swallowed him whole.

~*~*~*~*~

Upon waking up, he lifted his head to look at the alarm clock. "Was I really asleep for five hours?" he asked incredulously

"Yep," Lilleas replied.

"Oh man," he groaned as he plopped back on the bed. "I could have slept for like ten hours." Turning his head to the side, he saw Cloud curled up, sleeping. He slowly sat up and wiped the sleepiness from his face. "Guess we've got to take care of Cloud," he said, his eyes aimlessly scanning the ground. Summoning some energy he said, "Okay, I'll just get a cup of tea and then we can get to work."

Zack hadn't been looking forward to fixing up Cloud's wound. In fact, he dreaded it more than a large round of Hojo's Mako injections. He'd have gone to the ends of the world to spare Cloud from pain, but in an ironic twist of fate, he'd now be the one actually administering it. It didn't matter to Cloud that it was for his own benefit. Cloud didn't understand that he had a large gash in the back of his head. He only understood pain, a language he'd been fluent in for too many years.

But the wound wasn't going to fix itself, so after gulping down a revitalizing cup of tea, Zack went about thoroughly sterilizing his hands with soap before collecting the materials necessary for mending the wound. Looking over his shoulder, he caught a glimpse of his friend. Tucked under layers of covers, he looked so calm and peaceful. A satiated smile still graced his lips, leftover from the tub incident earlier in the day. As Zack sat down on the bed he thought to himself, this definitely isn't going to be easy. With a despondent sigh, he pulled Cloud out from under the covers and placed him in his lap so that his head was resting on his thighs, turned down to fully expose the injury. "Alright buddy, it's time for your procedure. I'm Doctor Fair, and Nurse Lilleas will be assisting me today."

"Hey, why can't I be a doctor too?" Lilleas asked, pursing her lips in a soft pout.

"Well only one of us can be a doctor, and I'm older so we're doing what I say." He cut her off before she could complain, "Besides, there's no way you're getting me into one of those little nurse outfits."

"You know they don't actually wear that. Where do guys get that fantasy from?"

Zack quickly considered her question and decided it would be easiest to just ignore it and move on. He didn't feel like discussing the details of his sordid fantasies with a teenage girl. In any case, it had been years since he'd seen a real nurse, and perhaps his memory had been faulty. "Alright, moving on, let's get this show on the road."

As Zack started to remove the pink bandage, Cloud shifted and curled back up into a fetal position. He nuzzled his head into Zack's thigh like he was preparing a pillow for sleep, and let out a soft murmur of contentment. Cloud definitely wasn't making things any easier for Zack. "Come on Spike, you're killing me here. Now stop playing around. This is serious. You're going to have to keep your head down so I can get a good look at the injury." Zack paused for a moment, eyes focused on the wall, thinking. "You know what, let's do this in the bathroom. It's too comfy here, and besides, it's probably going to get messy."

Picking his friend up, he asked, "Lilleas, could you get a few pillows and the stuff to fix his head up. I'm going to get him settled down in there."

Once he was in the bathroom he propped himself up against the tub, crossed his legs, and situated Cloud so that his head rested in his lap. Zack tenderly said, "Sorry buddy, you know I hate doing this."

Lilleas entered the bathroom with carefully measured steps because she had everything balanced precariously on top of a pillow. "I didn't know how many pillows you wanted, so I brought three of them." She carefully placed everything down beside Zack, and took a seat on the edge of the tub, waiting for further instructions like the good assistant she was trying to be.

"Oh, one more thing," Zack said. "Could you get a warm wet rag?"

"Uh, sure. What's it for?"

"It's something for him to bite down on. He's going to want to scream." Zack fought back the urge to scowl as the statement came out. The further he could remove himself from the situation, the easier it was going to be for all three of them.

Lilleas wasn't quite as stoic and made a slight grimace as she fetched the rag and soaked it with warm water. "Here," she said as she handed it to him.

Zack folded the wash rag up and stuffed a substantial portion of it In Cloud's mouth. Lilleas could see Cloud's body visibly stiffen, his muscles contracting in a sudden burst like he was trying to run. Zack spoke in a soothing voice, trying to appease the primal fear within his friend. "It's going to be okay buddy. It's just me, Zack. You remember me, right Spike?" Cloud was still very tense, so Zack softly stroked his hair, moving his hand in a slow steady rhythm until his friend finally relaxed.

Trying to sound confident Zack said, "Let's begin." Cautiously, he unwrapped the pink bandage, slowly revealing the grisly wound underneath. Lilleas bit her bottom lip to hold back a cry, but Zack was too preoccupied with the details of the procedure to notice. With dark eyebrows knitted in concentration, he held out the dirty bandage, a silent request for her to throw it away. Taking the sterile saline, he poured it over Cloud's wound, making sure to thoroughly coat it.

Cloud whimpered softly, his cries muffled by the warm rag in his mouth. He curled his hands into the linoleum floor in an attempt to grab onto something. Wanting to give him something to hold onto, Lilleas reached out to hold his hand. Zack quickly slapped her hand away. "Don't, he'll crush your fingers. He's much stronger than he looks." Zack didn't have time to obsess about Lilleas' potential hurt feelings at the moment. He had a job to do, and he needed to do it quickly. "Hang in there buddy, we're almost done." Turning to Lilleas he asked, "Could you uncap the Vaseline and hand me the gauze?"

Lilleas did as she was asked, and Zack spread the Vaseline over the gauze. Then he wrapped Cloud's wound up, and sealed the bandage with some paper tape. He leaned to the side so that he could get a good look at his bandaging handiwork. "Well, that's not bad. At least it's better than that pink thing." Bending over, he spoke to Cloud, "Don't worry, your spiky hair will grow back in no time."

Drawing Zack out of his conversation with Cloud, Lilleas asked, "So what does the Vaseline do?"

"It forms a temporary scab." Lilleas still looked quite skeptical, so Zack continued, "I know it looks bad, but he's healing pretty well. There wasn't much pus, so it's not infected, which is good. Come on, why don't you help me clean up, and then we can have dinner. I just have to put Cloud to bed first." Standing up, Zack scraped Cloud off the floor, and tucked him into bed.

Zack crouched down beside the bed and brushed the stray hair out of his friend's eyes. "You did a good job Spike, I'm proud of you." He lingered at the bedside, watching the soft rise and fall of Cloud's chest. As Zack reached out to stroke his friend's hand, Cloud mustered all of his energy to try and jerk his hand away. It was useless though because he was still too weak to do even that. Instead he glared at Zack, the only other person he could take his anger out on besides himself. Concentrating, he gave him an icy cold stare, effectively freezing Zack in place. Zack could feel the cold malice emanating off of Cloud, and it burned, like the frigid breath of Shiva.

"You okay Spike?" Zack asked, the worry evident in his voice.

A rough growl escaped from the back of Cloud's throat, a not-so-subtle warning for Zack to leave. He was mad about the painful procedure, and just wanted to suffer by himself.

"Okay, okay, I guess that's a no," Zack said as he stood up and backed away from his friend. "Well, I guess that means you won't be eating dinner with us then. I hope you feel better tomorrow," he said trying not to let the disappointment show in his voice.

~*~*~*~*~

The night was unusually silent between Zack and Lilleas. Neither one was in the mood to talk, so they ate their dinner quietly watching TV. Not long after dinner they got ready for bed, hoping that tomorrow would be a better day. So as not to disturb Cloud, Zack carefully crept into bed. With a heavy heart, Zack said, "Goodnight Spike." Then he turned to Lilleas, and said, "Goodnight. I'll see ya in the morning."

She echoed him in a faint voice, closed her eyes, and tried to get to sleep.

~*~*~*~*~

Sometime in the middle of the night, Lilleas' voice broke through the dark silence. "Zack, are you asleep?"

"Yes," he replied in a sleep husky voice.

"Zack, I can't get to sleep," she said with a despondent lilt at the end. It was an open invitation for Zack to complain, and he took her up on the offer.

"Me neither," he replied, his voice lacking inflection. "I guess I've just got stuff on my mind."

"Does it have anything to do with Cloud being mad at you?" she asked.

He let out a deep painful sigh and paused a few seconds before speaking. "Look, I don't want to talk about it."

"Oh," she said, carrying out the vowel in a remorseful way. She was beginning to learn that he was overly sensitive about Cloud. This was her second faux pas of the day concerning Cloud. She made a mental note of this and kept the conversation going. "So what do you do to get to sleep?"

Hoisting himself up on his elbow he said, "I count chocobos."

"Does it work?"

"If it did, would I be talking to you now?" he said narrowing his eyebrows at her. Of course, the only thing she could see in the dark was the faint outline of his face, but his sarcastic intonation was not lost in the darkness.

"Well it's better than nothing," she said, trying to be optimistic. "Maybe I'll try it. Wait, what color chocobos do you use?"

"Whatever color you like. I like yellow because it's a happy color."

"Oh," she said contemplatively, "I think I'm going to try a rainbow."

Lifting a dark eyebrow in question Zack asked, "You mean a rainbow chocobo?"

"No," she said rolling her eyes, "I mean like a bunch of different colors."

"Good luck with that," Zack scoffed. Before laying back down he re-adjusted his pillow with the hope that it would help him get to sleep. He tried not to look at the clock, but its bright green glow was too hard to resist in the dark. 3:24, it read. "Another sleepless night," he mumbled with a heavy sigh. After a few minutes of silence passed he asked, "Lilleas, are you still awake?"

"Hmmm, no answer," he said. "Guess that rainbow chocobo thing worked after all. Maybe I'll give it another try." This time he decided he'd try something different and use lilies instead of chocobos. He closed his eyes and focused on the image of the soft petal flowers, yellow representing the odd numbers and white representing the even numbers. Something slightly unexpected happened as he started envisioning the flowers. He remembered what it felt like to be young again, and to have the world at his feet. It was empowering. Things had changed since then. Now he had the weight of the world on his shoulders, and its large weight was slowly crushing him. He consoled himself with the fact that at least some things were the same. He still had Aerith. He knew that she was still waiting for him, tending her flowers until he returned. With that pleasant thought filling his mind, he started counting once again, from the beginning. Now that he was relaxed it didn't take long for him to fall asleep. He was only able to count to sixteen lilies before everything went black. As the image of a white lily faded into darkness, a soft smile crept up on his face.

~*~*~*~*~

**Author's Note:** I wanted to thank **Mint** for helping me! She helped me with a lot of ideas for this chapter. I think she was the one that came up with Lilleas busting into the bathroom. She also pre-read a few scenes for awkwardness including the bath scene. I wanted to make sure it wasn't too vulgar!

I started another story, which means that this story will probably be updated less frequently. This story is still a priority over the other one. When I came up with the idea I just had to go with it. It's an AU story based on Tess of the D'urbervilles, which is an awesome story. It should be good as long as I don't botch it up XD Zack's supposed to be a bit of a bad boy, so we'll see how that turns out.

Back to this story, I wanted to introduce the concept of fate. You have to admit, a lot of bad things happened to Cloud in the Compilation of FF 7. In a way it almost felt like there were outside forces trying to screw up his life. I mean SO many bad things happened to him. That brings up another good point about the difference between Zack and Cloud. To me, Cloud has always had a very fatalistic personality. He's always taken things as they came. Zack wouldn't accept fate and tried to change the inevitable with his sheer willpower. I think the whole thing of fate is an interesting one, and I often wonder about it in my own life. Anyway, I guess I was just playing around with it here. I also thought of it in terms of lemons. Life gave Zack lemons and he made lemonade. Life gave Cloud lemons, but didn't give him a pitcher, sugar, utensils, or a knife to cut the lemon. So he just takes it as it is and sucks the juice out of it because what else can he do? Anyway, taking care of a person that can't take care of themselves is not always glamorous. I'm sure there were many other un-glamorous things, which I won't be getting into. I'm still surprised at how easy they made it look in the video game. . . This was sort of a light chapter, but it gets darker soon. Probably the next chapter, but I can't be certain, though the next chapter will probably be long because I'll be writing it on Christmas break. I really didn't think I was going to get this chapter out before Christmas because of finals so I'd like to those who gave me words of encouragement!

I want to make another little note about Cloud's comatose condition. **Artic Whisper** brought this up, and it's a good point. How awake/conscious is Cloud? Well I discussed it with my mom, and we determined that since he has to eat, go to the bathroom, and breathe by himself his autonomic nervous system is working fine. Then it must be his central nervous system/central processing that is impaired. Also, when he finally snaps out of his condition, he talks fairly normal, which would lead one to believe he said a few words here and there. People waking up out of actual comas are much less responsive than Cloud when he woke up from his. Another thing that's interesting is that I read an account of someone that was put in an induced coma, and she said that while she couldn't respond to anything she could hear everything her family was saying to her. My mom told me that the hearing is always the last to go, so it's very probably that Cloud is hearing most of what Zack is saying even if he can't respond. It may be jumbled up in his mind though, which brings me to another point. Cloud is going to have some good days and bad days. He may be more responsive on some days, and maybe less responsive on others. I kind of see his condition as something that's actually constant, with fluctuations. Does anyone have any other thoughts on this?

I know some of you reread this, so I'll probably be fixing up the early chapters over break. This has been my first story writing experience so it was a little rough in the beginning, or as my mom put it clunky. O_o She's brutally honest. . .always. When I was in high school she rolled on the ground laughing because my essays were too sappy. She had an accident more than once, and wet herself from laughing too hard. Not exactly the best confidence booster in the world, but she was right. My writing was sappy when I was younger. It wasn't until college that my writing came out of that phase. I still have trouble with dialogue and such because prior to this my writing experience was exclusively essays.

I'm so thankful for the reviews! It means so much to me :) I probably won't put out anything else until after Christmas so I'm wishing everyone a Merry Christmas! For those who don't celebrate Christmas, Happy Holidays! Oh and thank you to those who have wished me good luck on my exams! This is supposed to be the worst quarter ever. Five exams in about a week and then a cumulative exam that we need to pass to move onto our rotations. I wish everyone else luck with exams! Be it high school, college, or post-graduate education, exams are never fun. . . Boo :(


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

Zack had woken up a few minutes ago, but since Cloud and Lilleas were still asleep, he decided to linger in bed a while longer. For once it was quiet and peaceful, and he had no desire to shatter the silence, at least not yet. Through half-lidded eyes filled with sleep, he stared at the harsh white ceiling, which inspired thoughts of yesterday's events. On the blank white canvas above, the light played in intricate shadows, and before Zack knew what was happening one of the shadows took the likeness of his friend. The dark image glided across the ceiling before falling down and vibrating quickly, almost as if convulsing. The image was too lifelike, too real, too _Cloud_. He clamped his eyes shut, using the darkness to block everything out. When he reopened his eyes the shadow that looked like his friend was gone, and he relaxed into his pillow with a sigh of relief.

From his position in bed, he could hear the soft pitter-patter of rain gently falling down on the roof of the motel. He found comfort in the familiarity of the sound for it was constant, like the color of snow or the smell of grass. Throughout the last few years, he'd learned to take pleasure in even the simplest of things because joy was hard to come by in Hojo's barren dungeon. After four long years of being without the rain, he fully appreciated this natural phenomenon. He reminded himself with a smile that he'd have to go out and stomp in a few puddles before everything dried up.

The soft noise tempted him to fall back asleep. His eyelids were growing heavy, but the air was too thick and moist to be comfortable. Yet his body refused to get up and move, so he decided to stay in bed, bathed in the aftereffects of sleep, dreaming of his joyous reunion with Aerith. He'd never forgotten the feeling of her soft velvety skin flush against him, so soft and luxurious, like a regal fabric import from Wutai. Thoughts of Aerith could occupy him for hours on end, but eventually his stomach got the best of him, and he got out of bed to get breakfast.

The rustling of the food woke up Lilleas. Rubbing the sleep out of her eyes she said, "Good morning."

"Oh hey Lilleas," Zack replied, his thoughts occupied with food. "Listen, I'm making some peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Do you want one?"

Her mind was still foggy from sleep so she was a bit slow in her response. "Sure, that's sounds good."

"Alright," Zack said with enthusiasm, "two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches coming up."

"Huh, what about Cloud?" she asked with concern.

Zack chuckled, "Have you ever seen a dog eat peanut butter?"

She wasn't sure where this was going so she replied with a hesitant voice, "Yeah."

"Eh, that's kind of what it's like when I give it to Cloud. He has a hard time chewing so it kind of sticks to his mouth and throat."

Lilleas looked over at Cloud and smiled as she thought of a dog eating peanut butter. The image of Cloud's soft pink tongue frantically darting around trying to get rid of the sticky sensation made her giggle.

Zack was almost done preparing the sandwiches when Lilleas interrupted. "Hey, how come one of them is so much bigger than the other?"

"Oh, this?" Zack questioned while pointing to the larger sandwich. "This is a triple-decker PB and J."

"Is that for you?"

"Of course." Zack looked up from the sandwiches and gave her a saucy grin. "What, do you think you can handle this?"

"Sure, why not," she replied nonchalantly with a shrug of her shoulders.

Quirking an eyebrow, he said incredulously, "You do realize that your mouth isn't even as big as the sandwich."

"So," she said defensively, "it stretches."

"Alright," Zack said with a skeptical shake of the head, "two triple-decker sandwiches coming up."

Her eyes grew wide as he presented it to her. "That looks a lot bigger up close."

"It's what you wanted right?"

She agreed with a subtle nod of the head. Zack sat down opposite of her and started eating his sandwich. After taking a few large bites, he looked up from his sandwich to see Lilleas still sizing it up. He waited until he finished chewing his current mouthful to ask, "Still think you can eat it?"

"Yeah, I'm working on it," she replied with as much confidence as she could muster.

Zack chuckled lightly before devouring the rest of his sandwich. He didn't stop to look up until he'd finished it, and by then Lilleas had taken the top part off and made it into two separate sandwiches.

"So I guess your mind is bigger than your mouth is," Zack said with a cocky air as he threw out the paper plate he'd been eating on.

"Well I wish I could say the same for you," she shot back teasingly.

"Oooo, that's a good one," he said shaking his finger at her. "Don't worry, I'll get you back. No teenage girl outsmarts Zack Fair."

"You sure about that?" There was a sweet smile on her face, but the fire in her eyes told a different story.

Scrunching his eyebrows in confusion Zack said, "Whoa, what got into you this morning. Maybe I should stop feeding you." Putting his hands behind his head, he reclined on the bed. With a sigh he added, "You know, you kind of remind me of my girlfriend at times."

"Really?"

"Yeah, well just a little bit. Maybe that's why Cloud likes you so much." He finished the statement with a soft smile as he looked over at his sleeping friend.

She looked away from Zack to hide the blush creeping into her cheeks. The thought of Cloud with another girl made her slightly uncomfortable. Looking at the ground she asked in a low voice, "Did he really like her?"

"Spike? Nah, he actually never met her. I just know he'd like her though." A large dreamy smile graced his face as he thought about Aerith. "Well, everyone seemed to like her."

"She had to have some enemies though, right? I mean nobody's that perfect."

His bright smile disappeared almost as quickly as it came, and his voice took on a somber tone. "Yeah, you're right. She did have some people that didn't like her." He paused, looking at Lilleas with blue eyes that said everything, but lips that refused to speak. Finally, the words found their way out, fluttering down, like the petals of a dying flower. "I have someone taking care of her, but I don't know that I can trust him anymore."

Lilleas tried to reassure him by saying, "I'm sure she's safe." She didn't actually know much about the situation, but she knew it had to be bad if Zack was depressed about it. Being the optimistic one seemed like the right thing to do at the moment.

"I hope so. . ." his voice dropped off suddenly, like a rock on the edge of a cliff, falling into the dark abyss of despair below. With a scoff he added, "I'm such a pathetic boyfriend. I can't even protect her."

Lileas stood up from the bed and walked over to Zack. Her face softened as she placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder and said, "I don't know much about you, but you're a good person. I know you'd be with her now if you could. I'm sure she knows that too."

Placing his hand on top of hers, he looked up at her, azure eyes clouded over in sorrow. A faint smile tugged at the corners of his lips as he said, "Yeah I guess you're right." The moment between them was brief because Zack quickly changed the subject. "Well, I should probably feed Cloud now. He hasn't eaten since yesterday morning. So I'm sure he's pretty hungry."

"I'll get the food for you," she politely offered, "what does he want?"

"Just get the condensed milk. He needs some calories." Zack crawled over to his friend and gently shook him. "Wake up Spike, it's time to eat."

An annoyed grunt was all Cloud gave in response.

"Okay, well I have to go to the store soon so you're going to have to eat now."

This time, a much more threatening moan followed. Although, neither Zack nor Cloud knew what the threat was meant to be.

Pulling back the covers, Zack grabbed his friend saying, "Come here tough guy. It's time to eat. You can go back to sleep after this."

Zack had a firm grip on his friend so now he was trapped. Cloud was tired of Zack making all of the decisions for him. Since when did Zack know best? It was time for a change, but there wasn't much that he could do in his current state, or was there?

Lilleas handed Zack the can of condensed milk and sat down close to Cloud. Sensing his tension, she reached out a hand and delicately cupped his cheek. "Don't worry. It's going to be okay. Zack's just trying to feed you."

Her soft touch and gentle words did little to console him. Zack poked a hole in the top of the can so that there was a small opening for the liquid to flow through. "Alright Spike, you ready to eat?"

Unable to properly vocalize his thoughts, all he could do was moan or grunt, hardly an intelligible response. What he was really thinking was, "Zack. . . no tell me what to do."

Of course, Zack couldn't hear Cloud's thoughts, but he had an intuitive feeling this wasn't going to be an easy feeding session. Using one hand to tilt Cloud's head back, he used the other to pour the thick sweet liquid down his throat. Instead of swallowing, Cloud relaxed his bottom lip ever so slightly, which allowed the liquid to drain out of his mouth.

"Ewww, yuck," Zack said in disgust as he watched the liquid drain out of Cloud's mouth and onto his bathrobe. Reaching over, Zack managed to clamp Cloud's mouth shut with his hand, but he still managed to spit out a steady stream of liquid. Zack managed to catch some of the liquid that came out by placing his hand underneath Cloud's chin. Unfortunately, much of it had already gotten on Cloud's bathrobe. "Lilleas, could you get me the trashcan, some towels, and a wet rag?" he asked, like a desperate parent at the end of their patience.

She was already up and on her feet before Zack finished his statement. Quickly, she gathered everything together and brought it to Zack.

"Thank you so much," he said with great appreciation. "Oh Gaia, I don't know what's gotten into him today. You think he's still mad about last night?" Zack asked while cleaning up the mess.

"Anything's possible," Lilleas said as she helped Zack clean up.

"Yeah," Zack said with derision. With a swift jerk of the head in Cloud's direction Zack snorted, "Look at him, he's laughing at me."

Lilleas looked over at Cloud, who wore an expression of severity on his face. His lips were pulled taut into a scowl, and his eyes were fixed intently on Zack in a burning glare. "You sure he's laughing?" Lilleas asked with surprise, "He looks mad instead."

"Believe me, I've known this guy for a long time and he's enjoying this. Underneath that callous exterior, he's chuckling to himself." Zack stopped cleaning for a moment and sat on the bed next to his friend. Firing a fierce gaze at Cloud, Zack asked in a voice tinged with anger, "What's your problem man?"

Cloud just narrowed his gaze, upping the ante. His eyes burned bright with fury, a corona of blue light pulsating within. It was harsh signal for Zack to back off, but instead Zack took it a step further. Nostrils flaring and teeth clenched, he got up close to Cloud's face. Now inches away, Zack could feel the warm breath of his friend gusting over his face. The moment was hot, sweaty, and uncomfortable, but neither one was backing down. It was a battle of testosterone as each vied for control.

By this point, Lilleas had become scared, so she ran into the bathroom and shut herself up inside. She wasn't sure what was going to happen, but if the tension in the air was any indicator, it wasn't going to be pleasant.

After several minutes, the tension had grown to an unbearable level. Zack's patience was stretched to the limit, and his sanity was about to burst. Then the corners of Cloud's lips twitched into a smile, and Zack exploded. "You think this is all a game, don't you?!" Getting up from the bed Zack continued his rant, "Fine, go ahead and starve! See if I care! It's not like I rescued you or anything, or care about what happens to you." Moving towards the door he said, "When you get real hungry we'll see who has the last laugh."

He made a loud exit as he slammed the door on his way out. Lilleas slowly cracked the door open and peeked around to make sure everything was okay before she emerged from her porcelain sanctuary. She quickly ran over to Cloud and found him in the same exact position she'd seen him in earlier. Shifting her weight to the side, she put a hand on her hip and said in a motherly tone, "I think you took it a little too far this time." As she started to tuck him into bed, she noticed that he was still sticky. Zack and Cloud had gotten into their fight in the midst of the cleaning process. With a sigh she grabbed a wet rag and finished cleaning him off.

Then she tucked him into bed and crawled in beside him. She wrapped her arms around his waist and held onto his tense hands. With a hint of hurt and betrayal in her voice, she asked, "Why have you been giving Zack such a hard time lately?"

Not having a good answer to give, Cloud remained stiff and quiet, hoping she would eventually excuse the silence and move onto something else.

She started playing with his fingers, plucking them slowly as one would the strings of a guitar. His fingers were rigid at first and difficult to move, but they eventually loosened up and became soft and pliable in her hands. Still playing with his fingers she said, "Don't worry, he didn't mean what he said. He loves you more than anything else in this world."

His body reacted with a brief fit of tension before relaxing into the bed. She snuggled into his lithe form, wrapped herself around him, and pressed her face into the back of his neck. In a soft calming whisper she said, "You're lucky to have someone that loves you so much. You know he'd do anything for you."

A single tear escaped from the corner of Cloud's eye. Yes, he knew.

~*~*~*~

The rain wasn't as much fun as Zack thought it would be. Sure, the puddle splashing was fun, but it didn't outweigh the fact that he was now miserable and sopping wet. His dark black spikes were limp and plastered to his head, and he felt just like a wet cat. There was a reason wet cats had such an angry mewl.

He cursed Cloud all the way to the general store. If Cloud hadn't started that fight, he would have waited until the storm cleared to go to the store and would have avoided the rain all together.

Now that he was in front of the store entrance, he gave his head a thorough shake to get rid of the excess water. He wanted to look at least half-way decent while shopping.

Upon entering the store, he found that there was a squeaky noise following him. The sound stopped when he stopped and resumed whenever he started walking, almost like someone was following him. It only took a minute or two before he figured out that it was his wet boots squeaking on the linoleum floor.

"Get a hold of yourself Zack," he mumbled quietly to himself, "no one's following you." Returning back to his original purpose, he recited the shopping list aloud, "So I need a needle and thread, boxers, a blanket, and an outfit for Lilleas. Well, that shouldn't take me very long. Hopefully."

He headed off in the direction of the men's clothing department because it was the first one he saw. It didn't take him long to navigate through the clothing and find the underwear section. Sorting through the underwear to find some plain colored ones, he came across several novelty pairs. He chuckled to himself, "Smiley faces? Hearts? Chocobos?! What idiot would wear this kind of stuff?" With a sheepish grin, he suddenly realized that he had been that idiot once. Aerith had given him a pair of pink chocobo boxers long ago. All it took from her was a sweet smile and fluttering eyelashes, and he'd do just about anything, which included wearing pink chocobo boxers. She had him wrapped around her finger like a piece of string, and he knew it too. But he was a happy piece of string, happy to be wrapped around her in any size, shape, or form.

Finally, he found some plain black boxers. In contemplation he said, "Hmmm, I wonder what size Spike is. He's a pretty small guy so maybe a small." Picking up a small pair of boxers, he stretched it over his waist and found that it didn't go all the way around. With a sigh he said, "Well, these boxers run pretty small so I guess I'll just get one in every size and something should fit the two of us."

Moving on to find the next item, he couldn't help but worry about Cloud. As he dried off, his anger started to dissipate and was replaced by genuine concern. He hadn't left his friend alone since the kidnapping. Everything should be okay, he reminded himself. He was only going to be gone for an hour or two, but nothing was ever certain with Cloud. Just about anything could happen while he was gone, and that's what he was worried about.

~*~*~*~

Snuggled up together under the warm blankets, Cloud and Lilleas had no trouble falling asleep. They both looked peaceful, wearing innocent expressions, much like children when they slept. However, Cloud was in some place far from peaceful, a nightmare blended with reality.

_Tucked away from the harsh Nibelheim winter, Cloud slept comfortably in his bed at the Inn. Over the course of the night, the room had grown uncomfortably warm__. __Not even the summers in Nibelheim were this warm, which meant that something was definitely amiss. Unable to tolerate the sweltering heat, he sat up in bed, drenched in a thick layer of sweat. _

_He was about to get up and get a glass of water to cool his parched throat when he noticed a faint orange glow peaking in through the bottom of door, and a strong smell of charred wood that permeated the air. The air was thick and heavy with smoke, making it hard to breathe. He had a sinking feeling that something was wrong. Something was very, very wrong. _

_Oddly, Zack wasn't in his bed. He searched the hotel room for his friend calling out in a panicked voice, "Zack! Zack! Where are you?!" _

_He didn't wait for a response, but it didn't matter because none came. Quickly throwing on his Shinra gear, he bolted out the door and down the stairs. That sinking feeling he had turned into a drowning feeling as he staggered back in horror at the sight of flames engulfing the lower half of the building. Thick tendrils of smoke rose up from the fire and snaked its way into his throat, choking him, and corroding his airways. As he made his way across the room, he ducked down to try and avoid the thick layer of smoke, but he still received a hefty dose of the suffocating fumes. _

_In between coughs, he frantically called out for any survivors. "Hey! Is anybody still here? Does anyone need some help? Hey, is any. . ." His voice dropped off as he saw several dead bodies laid out in front of him, strewn about the floor in a haphazard fashion. There was a trail of blood that led from their bodies to his feet, and he was standing in a big pool of it. His eyes grew wide with terror as he struggled to take in the whole scene. He blinked a couple of times, hoping that maybe it was all a bad dream, but each time he opened his eyes the grisly scene was still there and just as horrible as ever. His eyes started to water, though he couldn't tell if it was from the smoke or absolute terror. _

_Frozen in place by fear, he nearly jumped out of his skin when a fiery beam crashed down inches away from him. Escape, he thought. He needed to find a route of escape. Thoughts of everything else could wait, but right now if he wanted to live, he needed to get out of this place. After gathering his wits together, he scurried over to the door. He reached up to turn the doorknob, but immediately withdrew his hand from the burning object. "Shit," he cried as he examined his burnt hand. It had already turned a bright shade of red, but the worst was yet to come. The painful blistering and peeling that accompanied a severe burn would come later. _

_Realizing that the door was no longer a viable option, he frantically scanned the room for another exit. There was only one other way out, and that was the window. He needed something to bust through the glass, and that's when he spotted a chair next to the window. Picking up the hefty object, he hurled it forcefully through the glass. It shattered with an explosion of glass shards, raining down in a storm of sharp little crystals. With very little time to react, he only managed to close his eyes and turn his head away as the glass came raining down. His exposed arms were ripped up, but at the moment that was the least of his problems. _

_He hastily jumped through the jagged glass hole, cutting the front of his legs in the process. Once he made it out of the building, he saw something so horrific it knocked the air out of him and brought him to his knees gasping, "Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. This cannot be happening!"_

_The whole village was alight in flames. It was all part of the grand finale of a madman intent on destruction. The heinous flames were beautiful and abhorrent all at the same time. Flames leapt from rooftop to rooftop performing their deadly dance in fine precision. It was to be their last and final performance, and now they had an audience of one, Cloud. Transfixed by the fiery glow around him, he gave the fire his undivided attention as he watched his childhood dreams, hopes, and memories go up in flames. _

_He was still on the ground, pinned down by shock and fear. He knew he needed to get up and do something, a__nything__, but all rational thought had left him long ago. That's when he caught sight of his own house, flames hungrily lapping the sides, and smoke billowing out the cracked windows. _

_Realizing that his mom was probably still in the house, he got a sudden burst of energy to go rescue her. It was sheer adrenaline that pulled him up to his feet and set him off running towards his house. The door was slightly open. For a split-second he hesitated. Did he really want to see what was waiting for him on the other side of that door?_

_Gulping down his fears, he kicked open the door and dodged the flames to get inside. On the floor before him was his mother, heavily bleeding from a stab wound to the chest. _

"_Mom!" he cried out in a half-sob. His voice was barely audible above the sizzling and crackling of the flames. _

_Scooping up her lifeless body, he hugged her tightly as though the mere action would somehow bring her back to life. He could feel his body shaking against her still form, and the whole thing just felt so wrong. He never imagined his mother dying in such a horrible manner, stabbed like a piece of meat and left alone to slowly die. Unrestrained tears that were afraid to fall now came out in full force. _

_Holding her against him, he sobbed, "Mom, who did this to you?" Staring back at him were glazed blue eyes, cold and lifeless, like a lake that had frozen over. Moving his hand to her chest, he searched for a heartbeat, but he couldn't find one. He didn't want to let go, but his mother had already passed, and the fire would consume him whole if he stayed. _

_Before laying her back down on the ground, he nuzzled her cheek affectionately saying, "I love you mom." Once she was on the ground, he brushed back her bangs and hoarsely whispered, "I'll find the monster that did this to you, and I'll make him pay."_

_For all he cared, the whole town could burn in hell, everyone except his mother and Tifa, of course. They had done nothing but tease and taunt him his whole life, but not his mother, she had always loved him. She was the one who nursed his wounds, tucked him in at night, cooked him nice hot meals, and provided a supporting voice when he was down. She was his rock of stability and the one who loved him when no one else did. Now that his mother was dead, the whole situation became personal. He needed to avenge her by bringing justice, and disposing of the monster that murdered her in cold blood. He didn't want to believe that it was his childhood hero, Sephiroth, that had committed such atrocities, but in his heart he already knew. _

_Before leaving the raging inferno that was once his house, he took one last look at his mother. With golden hair stained crimson, and a delicate frame twisted in pain, she was still beautiful, and would remain like that forever in his memories. Wincing in pain, he wiped away his tears as he sniffled, "I'm sorry I wasn't a better son." _

_Then he darted out of the house and headed towards the reactor. In the background he could hear the symphony of destruction playing a death march. It only spurned him into running faster up the mountain. The long trek had been shortened considerably by the fact that the monsters were hiding; they too were scared of the fire. _

_Now that he was finally outside the Mt. Nibel reactor__, __he paused on the steps so that he could catch this breath. He wanted to be prepared for whatever horrendous surprise was waiting for him inside. _

_A familiar voice caught his attention as soon as he opened the door and walked inside. "Well, it looks like our guest of honor has arrived," Sephiroth said with a delicious smirk. Standing at the top of the metal staircase with great poise, he looked down on Cloud in an intimidating manner. "We've all been waiting for you Cloud." With an elegant hand gesture Sephiroth continued, "As you can see Tifa and Zack are just _dying_ to see you."_

_Cloud tightened his grimace as he looked on in abject horror at the lifeless forms of his friends. Zack was sprawled out on the stairs, clinging to life, his blood dripping through the mesh metal staircase. Then his eyes turned to Tifa, who was crumpled up in a heap on a ledge at the bottom of the reactor. With a sigh of relief, he noticed that she was still breathing, and unlike Zack she was free of blood._

_Sephiroth descended the stairs with a carefully measured stride, each step slow and seductive, filled with purpose. He kept his gaze fixed on Cloud, being careful not to blink and ruin the tension between them. As he passed by Zack, he raised an eyebrow in contemplation before he lifted the heel of his boot and brought it down hard on his hand in a bone-crushing stomp. Zack yelped in pain and used his last bit of strength to pull his hands in close to his body. The corners of Sephiroth's lips twitched upwards, and his eyes twinkled with childlike amusement, as though this whole thing was a game, like jump rope or hopscotch._

"_Stop it!" Cloud yelled._

"_Oh? You mean this?" Sephiroth asked with a smug grin. He kicked Zack in the stomach and then rolled him over with a flick of his foot. Now that Zack was on his back, the front of his body was visible. His chest was littered with stab wounds, each hole oozing crimson liquid. Zack tried to curl up into a ball to ease the pain, but all he could do was moan through blood splattered lips. Cloud had never seen Zack so completely damaged and helpless before, and it scared him. Zack was always the hero, the savoir, the one who got 'the job' done. Now who would be the hero? _

"_Cloud," Zack groaned, nearly choking on his own blood, "stop Sephiroth." Even though his voice was weak, there was enough strength behind it for Cloud to grab hold of it and steal some for himself. _

"_Pathetic," Sephiroth said with a tinge of disgust. _

"_What do you want?!" Cloud snarled, putting on his best tough face._

"_What I want, Cloud, is for you to fight me," Sephiroth said with smug delight. He flashed a dangerous come-hither look, tempting, like the serpent of Eden. _

"_What?! Are you…are you crazy?" Cloud asked with bewilderment. He never thought he'd live to see the day that Sephiroth invited him to fight. _

"_Perhaps," Sephiroth replied with an indifferent expression as though the comment didn't faze or surprise him. "Zack's Buster sword is by the bottom of the stairs. What are you waiting for?"_

_Suspecting that this was a trick, he hesitantly walked over to the sword, being careful not to let Sephiroth out of his sight._

_As he picked up the sword, Sephiroth egged him on by saying, "That's it. Good boy."_

_Once the sword was in his hands, his whole body went numb, like he was paralyzed from the neck down. Instead of falling to the ground, he stayed upright, like some outside force was supporting him. Cloud was alarmed as he lost total control over his body. Even though he couldn't feel it, he could see himself walk closer to Tifa. He tried to fight each painstaking step with his mind because he had a bad feeling that whatever force was controlling him wanted Tifa dead. His efforts seemed futile as he continued to close the distance between him and his childhood friend._

_He could feel Sephiroth's gaze boring into him, drilling past the fleshy exterior to access him at his most vulnerable, his soul. It _hurt_, gods did it hurt, but there was nothing he could do at the moment to stop it. _

_Beads of sweat collected on his brow, dripping into his eyes and making it hard to see. Even with blurry vision, he could still see what was happening. Now that he was hovering over her, she managed a weak smile for him, her knight in shining armor. In a sweet voice she whispered, "Cloud, you came." Her eyes fluttered shut in relief now that she knew her hero had come to rescue her._

_When he tried to speak, he found that his lips were unable to move, like they were glued shut. Even though something had control of his body, his mind was still his own. In his thoughts he screamed, "No! No, no, no, no, no! Please not Tifa!" _

_A dark feminine voice answered back in a soft crescendo, "Yes. Kill Tifa." _

_He couldn't quite place where that voice was coming from. It almost sounded like it was coming from the walls or materialized out of thin air, but how could that be? How could the voice even know what he was thinking? Could she read his thoughts?_

"_Why? Why is this happening? Why are you making me kill Tifa?" he thought, knowing that she would hear him._

"_Why?" The voice gave a dry cackle before answering back, "That little whore has too much control over you. She could never love you as much as I do. I'm your mother Cloud. I always know what's best."_

_Mother? That voice, he knew it sounded familiar. It was Jenova. "Get out of my head you stupid bitch!"_

_Feigning hurt, she sighed, "My dear son, that's no way to speak to your mother. We'll have to have a talk about this later. Now it is time my son. It's time to kill Tifa."_

_He could see his arms being raised up over his head, like some outside force was pulling up on them. He decided that he wasn't going to kill Tifa, he wouldn't let Jenova use him for that purpose. As he struggled to regain control over his body, his arms shook in resistance to Jenova's power. _

_He pleaded desperately with her in his thoughts. "No, no, no! This can't be happening! Please don't make me do this!"_

"_Don't worry son, I won't let you do this alone, we'll kill her together," she reassured in a sweet cajoling voice. No son of hers was going to disobey. She'd make sure Cloud killed her and liked it, so she used her powers to slap a smile on his face._

_In the end, he lost the battle against Jenova. It felt like an out-of-body experience as the sword came down and sliced through Tifa like butter. He could see what was happening, but had no control over his actions. Once the deed was done, control was restored to him and he screamed, "Tifa!"_

_She looked up at him with deep pools of brown swimming with hurt and betrayal. Dropping his sword, he rushed to her side. He wanted to cry, but he was still in too much shock to do so. Kneeling beside her, he softly cupped her cheeks and whispered, "Tifa, it wasn't me. I swear." His voice cracked as he lost control over his emotions. "You know I'd never do anything to hurt you." _

_Her breathing slowed, and she closed her eyes, refusing to look at him. He pressed a soft kiss on her forehead, which made her cheeks flush a pretty pink. "Good…goodbye, Tifa," he said tenderly, his voice soft, warm, and filled with affection._

_Then she closed her eyes, waiting for death to come and take her home, away from her current pain and suffering. _

_Sephiroth was still at the bottom of the stairs, watching, observing Cloud the way a scientist would observe a lab specimen. With a few slow claps of applause, he purred in a deep voice, "Excellent show Cloud. I've enjoyed every minute of it."_

_Cloud abruptly turned his attention to Sephiroth. The muscles in Cloud's jaw tightened and relaxed a few times before he spoke, "H-how could you?"_

_With a calm and collected expression, Sephiroth stared at Cloud impassively. "How could I do what? It looks like you did all that yourself Cloud." He gave a harsh emphasis to Cloud's name, which didn't go unnoticed by Cloud. _

"_Lies," he cried punching his fist down by his side. "All of it, lies!"_

_With a fury he'd never known before, Cloud grunted as he picked up the large Buster Sword and charged toward Sephiroth. With perfect timing, Sephiroth raised the Masamune as Cloud came within his reach, and plunged it into him with cold steel that sliced clean and sharp. Cloud screamed, an earsplitting wail that shattered the nightmare._

His loud scream pierced through the darkness of sleep, and woke Lilleas up. Shaking him hard she said, "Cloud, wake up! You're having a bad dream." She said it firmly hoping it would have some effect, but her voice lacked the magic touch, and Cloud was screaming just as loud as ever. The shrill noise reverberated in her ears and felt like a hammer pounding on her eardrums. She would do almost anything at the moment to make that excruciating noise stop. Her fingers started inching closer to the pillows, but luckily she had enough sanity left to keep from repeating the pillow smothering incident.

Out of options, she ran into the bathroom and closed the door behind her. The screaming still managed to work its way past the door, but it was at a much more tolerable level. She was about to crouch down and cover her ears when she spotted a used wet rag on the counter, which reminded her of something. "That's it!" she exclaimed with relief. She found a clean rag, wet it with warm water and rushed back out to Cloud. She dodged his flailing limbs and successfully stuffed the rag in his mouth.

He still screamed as though there was an army of Tonberries after him, all with their knives out, ready to shank him. At least now it was muffled so it came out much quieter. Lilleas made her way behind Cloud and clutched his head to her chest. She whispered soothing words in an effort to calm him. It eventually worked. Either that or Cloud just got tired of screaming. She tucked him back into the bed and wrapped herself around him. Neither of them could go back to sleep this time, no matter how warm and comfortable the blankets were. They both needed Zack.

~*~*~*~

Zack saved the worst for last, shopping for teen girl clothes. On his way to the store he realized that he hadn't thought this whole shopping trip through. Without Lilleas, he was going to have to shop for girl clothes by himself with only his manly instincts as a guide.

Well, it had to be done, so he sucked up his pride and headed over to the Juniors Department. As he started searching through the clothes, he realized he had no idea what he was looking for. Everything looked the same, and there were so many different variations of the same thing. That's when he remembered that Lilleas requested another dress. At least it eliminated some of the possibilities.

He started going through the racks, searching for a dress he thought she would like. Upon finding a nice pink dress, he placed it up to himself, and looked in the mirror.

"I think pink is your color," came a sweet feminine voice from behind him.

Upon turning around he saw Haley, the girl from the Pharmacy that had flirted with him. He was now acutely aware of the dress in his hands, and gave an embarrassed grin as he greeted her, "Hi, how are you?"

"I'm pretty good, but it appears you have a secret you've been hiding," she said as she directed her gaze towards the dress Zack was holding. "First I see you talking to condoms, and now I find out you like to wear dresses. You sure are an interesting person," she said with a suppressed giggle.

"Oh you mean this?" he asked with a sheepish smile on his face. Putting the dress behind him, he said, "t-t-this isn't for me."

"You don't sound too sure about that," she said with a coy smile.

He blushed a light pink, which added a healthy glow to his face, making him even more attractive than usual.

She took a step closer to him and gently placed a hand on his bare muscular arm. "You know, you're kind of cute when you're embarrassed."

He took a step back, putting an awkward distance between them. Not being in the mood to flirt back, all that came out was an innocent but confused reply. "Uh, thanks?"

She giggled in response. To keep the conversation going she asked, "So really, who are you shopping for?"

"Oh, uh, my little sister. My little brother is sick so she offered to stay with him while I went shopping," he said in a somber tone.

"Awwww, that's really sweet of you." Her voice came out overly sweet and sappy because she tried to sound empathetic, but she really could have cared less. Using her female cunning, she realized she had a way in. "How about I help you with that," she said sweetly, "you look like you could use some help."

How could he refuse an offer like that? After quickly weight his options, he decided to let her help him. It sure beat the alternative of scavenging through the forest of dresses alone with hordes of women around.

Surprisingly, he found that shopping with Haley was kind of fun. He'd forgotten what it felt like to talk to someone his own age, and he realized he missed it.

After picking out a new outfit for Lilleas, she escorted him to the cash register. As they were standing in line, she decided to go ahead and ask the question they both knew was coming. "So how about dinner tonight?"

Trying to let her down gently, he said, "Look, Haley, I had a really fun time with you, but I have a girlfriend."

Her eyes shifted to the floor, and he could tell that she thought he was making it up. He turned her to face him and looked her in the eyes as he said, "It's not like that. I really do have a girlfriend. You're a nice girl and all. Maybe in a different situation I would have said yes."

"Really?" she asked, looking up at him through long dark lashes. "You're not just saying that?"

"No, I'm serious."

"Well, okay," she said, still hesitant to believe him. "You know, guys like you are hard to find. Your girlfriend must feel very lucky."

This comment brought out a charming smile from Zack, one she hadn't seen before. "I'd like to think so," he said.

"Maybe I'll see you around, and if anything ever happens to your girlfriend don't forget to call me." She quickly jotted down her phone number on a spare piece of paper and handed it to him with a sweet smile.

After making his final purchases, he grabbed his bags and rushed off to their motel room. As opened the door of their room, he said in a cheerful booming voice, "Hey guys, I'm back!"

Lilleas quickly got out of bed, ran over to Zack, and threw her arms around his waist.

"Whoa," Zack said, a little surprised, "it's good to see you too." He used his free hand to give her comforting pats on the back.

Looking up at him, doe eyed, she said, "We missed you. Cloud's not doing so well."

Consumed with thoughts of Cloud, he immediately looked over at him and dropped the shopping bags. "Fuck, I knew this would happen if I left."

Lilleas let go of him so that he could make it over to the bedside where Cloud was laying. Crouched by the bed, he ran a hand through his friend's hair. He looked up at Lilleas and asked with concern, "What happened?"

"I don't know," she shrugged, "we were sleeping, and all of a sudden he woke up screaming. I stuffed a wet rag in his mouth and that seemed to calm him down a little bit, or at least it made the screaming not as loud."

With a sigh Zack said, "Sounds like he had a nightmare. Alright, come here buddy," Zack said as he picked up his friend and sat down in a chair.

Before Zack could even get himself situated, Cloud burrowed his head into Zack's chest, like he was trying to hide from someone or something.

Rubbing comforting circles on his back, Zack spoke to Cloud in a high pitched falsetto, like one would talk to an infant. "Spike, did you miss your Zack, huh? Did Spikey miss his Zack?"

In the background Zack could hear Lilleas giggling. "Cloud likes baby-talk?"

Zack chuckled lightly, "Yeah, sometimes, but only when he's traumatized. He's gets pissed off if I do it any other time."

"How can you tell?"

With one hand supporting Cloud's head, Zack dipped him down a bit to show her his face. "See, he looks much more relaxed now." Pulling Cloud back up, he clutched his friend's head to his chest and began speaking normally again, "It's okay buddy, it's just you and me here. You want to tell me what happened?"

Cloud looked up at him, eyes clouded over, and Zack couldn't tell if Cloud was in this world or the next. Then Cloud spoke, and all doubt was removed. His voice was thin, barely a whisper, quaking, and it died on his lips, "Jenova."

A grimace marred Zack's feature for a few seconds, before he pulled himself together, and clutched Cloud tightly to his chest, like someone was trying to steal his friend away from him and he wasn't giving him up. His eyes started to water, "I'm so sorry Cloud. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you." Tucking Cloud's head under his chin, he whispered a promise, soft but filled with reassurance. "I'm not giving you up to that alien-bitch. No one's going to take you from me."

"Who's Jenova?" Lilleas asked, not realizing she had horrible timing.

Still wearing a serious expression on his face, Zack said, "It's nothing that concerns you."

"Oh," she said, slightly taken aback. She had nothing more to say at the moment, so she watched as Zack put Cloud to bed. Zack went back to sit in the chair. One knee started shaking nervously as he contemplated the current situation. Jenova had a stronger hold over Cloud than he once thought, and she wasn't giving up without a fight. Well, if it's a fight she wants, then it's a fight she'll get, Zack thought to himself.

Lilleas came over and sat across from him at the small little table. It was obvious that Zack was absorbed in thought, so she tried to ease her way in with an innocent question. "How much longer are we staying here?"

Zack's voice was distant, because his mind was occupied with far more important things at the moment. "Probably another week, just until Cloud recuperates. I'm worried because he's not eating much."

"Oh yeah," Lilleas said solemnly. "Maybe tomorrow will be better," she said giving him a weak smile.

"Yeah, perhaps," Zack said, trying to force a smile. "Listen, I'm going to take a nap, so why don't you watch some TV for a while and then we'll have dinner."

Lilleas liked the sound of food. "Okay," she agreed.

Zack crawled into the bed with Cloud, and tucked his friend into his larger form, fitting together like lock and key. Then he wrapped his strong arms around Cloud, letting him know that he was there and always would be. At the moment, with Zack wrapped around him, Cloud felt complete. Zack was his arms when he couldn't reach, eyes when he couldn't see, and faith when he didn't believe. Zack was the beginning, the end, and everything in between. It felt good to be loved. After a few minutes, when he was certain Zack wasn't going to leave, he allowed himself to relax for the first time that day and sank into the bed.

Before falling asleep, Zack spoke the words that Cloud knew so well, simple words that held such hope and promise, "It's going to be all right."

~*~*~*~

As fate would have it, while Zack and company were still in town, two Shinra grunts found themselves taking an unplanned trip to Fairton. They had orders to enter, "Barados," a town about thirty miles north of Fairton, but some outside force, be it natural or supernatural, made them deviate from their original plan. As if guided by an invisible hand leading them forward, they walked into Fairton despite their underlying doubts.

"Johnny, are you sure about stopping in Fairton? It's not on our schedule," Ashwin commented as he warily surveyed their surroundings.

"I've never been surer about anything in my life," his friend replied with arrogant confidence. "I just have this _feeling _that the runaway specimens are here."

Scratching the back of his head in uncertainty, Ashwin asked, "Didn't you have a feeling about the last town we were in? Come to think of it, you had a feeling about that last town we were in, and the town before that, and the town. . . "

Johnny cut him off before he could drone on much longer, "Yeah, yeah, I get your point, but it's really different this time. You got to believe me man," he said pounding his fist against his chest in a demonstration of confidence. "I really got a _feeling_ about this place, kind of like the spirits are talking to me and shit."

"Alright," Ashwin sighed, "but if you're wrong we aren't listening to any more of your stupid-ass _feelings_."

"Yeah, but if I'm right then you owe me a lavish victory dinner," Johnny retorted.

"Hell, with that reward money, I'll buy you several victory dinners," Ashwin said mockingly.

"I guess I'll have you to thank then when I'm savoring my nice juicy steak."

"In your dreams," Aswhin said with a good-natured chuckle.

"Your mom's in my dreams," Johnny said with a sly smile.

This prompted Ashwin to shove his friend, and they continued to laugh and joke for a while as friends often do. After the laughter died down, they were both overcome by silence, a reticent period of calm as they continued on their way to Fairton.

Ashwin's voice cracked as it broke through the stale air, "Do you think the rumors are true that those two runaway specimens were really human once?"

"I don't know," Johnny said with a wistful sigh, "I guess anything's possible with Hojo. I'll tell you one thing that's for sure, that guy's a creepy ass freak. I wouldn't even go near him with a ten foot pole." A cold shiver ran down his spine and he said with trepidation, "It gives me goosebumps just thinkin' about him."

"So what do you think is going to happen when we uh, um. . ." the words stuck in his throat like a lump of food, one he was unable to spit out or swallow.

Johnny, being the less sensitive of the pair, finished the question for him, "capture them? I don't know man, that's not our job."

"Yeah. . . "

"Cheer up Ashwin, it's not the end of the world. It's not like they're humans anymore after those experiments." He could hear his friend audibly gulp after he finished saying the word 'experiments.' "Remember, they told us not to be fooled by their human looking appearances. You don't feel sorry for killing monsters, do you?"

"I guess not," Ashwin replied hesitantly.

"Well same thing then. Just think of them as a Grand Horn, or a Tonberry."

Ashwin, not wanting to linger in his guilt, asked, "Can we talk about something else now?"

"Like how you're going to buy me a victory dinner," Johnny said in his best attempt to cheer up his friend.

A deep-seated groan escaped from Ashwin's lips. "Oh gods you're impossible."

"Well you were the genius to volunteer us for this mission," Johnny reminded his friend.

"That was before I knew what a jack-ass you were," Ashwin teased with a twinkle in his eyes.

~*~*~*~

Johnny and Ashwin were on a top secret mission to find the two runaway experiments that had escaped from Hojo's lab on December 2006. Not much had been revealed to them about the case, except for the fact that all information concerning said case was extremely classified, and the consequences for leaking any information would be most dire. Before they left for their mission, they were sworn to secrecy and given only the information that would direct them to find the pair of fugitives. They were quite surprised when they weren't even shown a picture of the two creatures. All they were given was a vague description of their appearances and told that they'd recognize them immediately upon first sighting.

Since Zack and Cloud's escape, orders had been handed down from the President to make sure that neither one of them saw the light of day again. President Shinra was no fool. A bit ruthless perhaps, but not a fool by any means. If Zack Fair, SOLDIER 1st Class, was announced dead then Zack Fair didn't exist to the rest of the world, and the President paid good money to make sure that happened.

The details and specifics of the mission were not the President's problem. That was for someone else to worry about. If the company was a well-oiled machine, then the President was the owner, the one that set the cogs in motion and kept them moving. When there was a problem with the machine, the President never actually got his own hands dirty, that's what mechanics were for.

Hojo had already contacted the President and demanded that the specimens be returned to him for further research. They may have been failures, but they were his failures, and he could always find another use for them. President Shinra knew the gruesome experimental methods that Hojo used to obtain his results, but he turned a blind eye to the inner mechanics of the whole Science Department. One didn't become the president of an oppressive multi-billion dollar corporation by being empathetic and caring.

After considering Hojo's request, President Shinra made the declaration that the two specimens were to be found and brought back alive if possible. Of course, Hojo warned the President that the creatures were very dangerous, so extra special care was needed to successfully capture them.

No one knew the current whereabouts of the specimens, so a pack of Shinra grunts was dispatched to various parts of the world to find them. Once the specimens were found, the Shinra grunts were to call in reinforcements for their capture. Ashwin and Johnny were just two of many Shinra grunts that had been sent out on the search. They didn't mind the job. In fact, they had volunteered for it when they got word of the large reward money being offered upon the successful capture of the specimens.

In the big scheme of things, Ashwin and Johnny were nothing more than two cogs in a machine among thousands of others. Their only purpose was to spin as instructed without asking questions. This large machine had been rusting from the inside out for many years now, but it could have lasted for quite a while longer in its decrepit condition. President Shinra would just have to add another layer of gold to the outside. He learned early in his successful career that appearances trump everything else in life.

Unbeknownst to everyone, Zack was about to throw a wrench into the whole operation and bring it to a screeching halt. At the moment, everyone was too focused on finding the specimens to realize that the company was crumbling, which included Ashwin and Johnny.

Once they had made it into town, they focused on creating a search strategy. They reasoned that it would be best to start their search at a grocery store versus a motel because there were only four grocery stores in town and about fifty motels. With their search strategy in place, they went about searching the grocery stores.

After a search of the first three grocery stores turned up fruitless, they finally came to the last grocery store in town, "FOODMART."

Ashwin had become highly skeptical by this point. "Can we just go to Barados after this? We weren't supposed to come here anyway," Ashwin nagged.

His reservoir of patience having dried up, Johnny snapped, "Shut the hell up."

"Fuck you man," Ashwin said, more tired and hungry than he was angry.

"Let's just hold it together for this last store, and then you can let loose on me," Johnny said, his words slow and plodding. He was tired because it had been a long day, and he'd already heard enough of his friend's complaints.

Ashwin just grunted in response. As they entered the store, Ashwin found himself drawn to the case of donuts that had been strategically placed by the store's entrance.

Johnny grabbed a fistful of his friend's shirt and drug him away saying, "You and your stupid stomach. You can eat later. Right now we have work to do."

After Johnny let go of him, Ashwin brushed himself off, recovering the little bit of dignity that he had left.

"So, let's get in line and ask the checker if we can speak to the store manager," Johnny said as he scanned the store for the shortest check-out line.

"Sounds good to me." Ashwin followed his friend, being careful to stay a step behind so he didn't accidentally invoke Johnny's anger.

Once they were in line, Ashwin reached out to grab a couple of candy bars.

This earned him an irritated groan from his friend, "You really couldn't wait, could you?"

"What? I'm really hungry," Ashwin complained.

"Well, it wouldn't hurt you to lay off the candy." Emphasizing his point, Johnny threw a disapproving glance at Ashwin's growing belly.

"Just leave me alone," Ashwin grumbled.

Johnny was about to respond when it suddenly became their turn in line. After Ashwin bought his candy, Johnny posed a question to the checker, "Is it possible for us to speak with your manager?"

The checker threw him an annoyed glance before responding. "Sure, just stand over to the side and I'll page him."

They had to wait for ten long minutes with nothing to do but stare at people purchasing their groceries. Finally, the manager came up to them in a brisk walk. Upon approaching them, he plastered a cheesy smile onto his face and asked politely, "What can I do for you gentlemen today?"

"Well, we wanted to ask if you'd seen or heard anything about these two men," Johnny said, taking a determined step towards the store manager.

The store manager squinted in anticipation of what Johnny was about to say next.

"We don't actually have a picture of the two men, but we do have a picture of the outfit they were last seen wearing." Johnny handed over a photo of the SOLDIER uniform and the store manager's eyes lit up with recognition.

"This picture rings a bell of some sort. Go on please."

"So about the two men, one has black hair, and the other has light blonde hair. The man with the dark hair may have been carrying a really big sword on his back, even taller than himself. Let's see, what else. . ." Johnny said rubbing his chin in concentration.

"Oh, the blonde one is in a coma-like state supposedly, and they both have glowing blue eyes," Ashwin interjected with a smile. He was a bit proud of himself for being able to help.

"Oh yeah!" exclaimed the store manager as he put the puzzle pieces together. "Those two men were at my store the other day. I'd have to say about three days ago. They were. . . "

Johnny had already grabbed Ashwin and was almost out the door when he looked back and cried, "Thanks!"

"Wait, don't you want to hear about the incident?" the store manager called after him.

"No, we got what we needed," Johnny said as he disappeared out the door. Once they were outside, Johnny shook his friend with excitement. Breathless, he huffed, "Do you know what this means?!"

"We get to finally eat lunch?" Ashwin joked.

"No you idiot, it's time to find the specimens! We don't have time to eat. Come on, let's go!"

**Disclaimer:** All characters except Lilleas are the property of Square Enix

**Author's Note:** **Blue Jae** helped me do a lot of research for this chapter. She also helped me work through the flashback. I think it sounds much better now! There's a few Tonberry references in there for you too **Blue Jae**. I know you love them! There's also a wet cat reference for you **Cookiecat. **I'm sure you know how mad/sad wet cats get when coming in from the rain =^..^=

So someone asked this, and I think it's a good question. The italicized part here is a dream, but Cloud feels that it's real. When you're in an actual nightmare/dream it feels so real. If you actually recognize that you're in a dream/nightmare while you're in it, it's called lucid dreaming. I've had the experience before a couple of times. Actually, as an interesting explanation, some drugs like antidepressants can give you extremely vivid dreams as I have found out. By extremely vivid I mean they are just as detailed as I wrote them. Perhaps Mako has that side effect, or I guess I'm assuming ;) It effects everyone differently though. Extremely vivid for some people are pleasant dreams that are very detailed. As for me I get horrifying nightmares that make me wake up screaming in the night, at least once a week and by screaming I mean I wake up the neighbors I'm so loud. The fact that it's a nightmare means certain events are changed. His mind would change things around in a nightmare, maybe even exaggerating certain parts, or certain fears. Like the fact that maybe he didn't feel he was a good enough son. Then there's Jenova, which was a suggestion by **Arctic Whisper** a while back. There will be more appearances of Jenova, or at least I have a few more planned. She's a big part of Cloud's life, unfortunately.

Crisis Core had a lot of plotholes, unfortunately. Here are the things that are known, and someone can correct me on any of this if I'm wrong. Tseng knew that Zack and Cloud were Hojo's experiments and tried to get them before Hojo did. He tried to free them, but he was unsuccessful. Upon their escape, I'm not sure if Tseng knew that it was Zack and Cloud that escaped. He might have, but if he did, then why did Cissnei not know that the specimens were Zack and Cloud. I don't think the Turks were aware of the identity of the specimens. Tseng might have been though, and just couldn't find Zack. Although how no one could find Zack for over a year is beyond me. It's not like he stands out or anything. . . .lol. Also, Tseng wanted to help Zack, but how would he explain that to the President? Anyway, Blue Jae and I came to reasonable answers and they'll be revealed as this story progresses. If you ask me, someone at Square Enix didn't do a good job of filling in the plotholes. . . lol.

I must admit there is one line in this story that is eerily similar to a Celine Dion song. I'm not going to point it out, but yeah, I had that song going through my head and I kind of took some parts of it and put it into a sentence. I don't know the exact lyrics of the song, or the name though.

So there's a bit of suspense in this chapter, I think, right? I'm not real good at suspense, but I'm trying. Thanks again for the reviews and words of encouragement! It really helps ^_^


	18. Chapter 18

**Rating: Mature.** Okay, let me explain this one. This chapter is more like in between a Teen and a Mature rating, and it concerns the flashback. Zack convinces Cloud to wear a dress . There's some sexual undertones, but no sex, kissing, yaoi, etc. Cross-dressing just seemed like a bit of an adult concept.

**Chapter 18**

Zack felt surrounded by green, green, and more green.

He didn't know how long he'd been staring at the green walls, seconds, minutes, or maybe even hours. Time was all relative, sometimes hours passed in the blink of an eye, and other times seconds plodded along like a snail. At the moment time seemed to have slowed to a stand-still. Now Zack was watching, waiting, trapped inside these walls, sharp and angular, like the corners of a cage. Defined boundaries and definite edges formed the rest of the cage, four walls and a ceiling.

Long ago, he thought life had been like that, there was a definite answer to every question and defined boundaries and morals to live by. Life was in shades of black and white, not murky muddled grey. He was a SOLDIER because he thought that was the right thing to do, that way he could become a hero and help people. At least that's what he'd been told.

No one was telling him anything now, just whispers from ghosts of the past, weak and faint, almost too quiet to be heard. At the moment he was stuck in a rut, trying to pull answers out of thin air and make sense of problems that didn't seem to have a solution. It didn't used to be like that. The answer to Shinra's need for Mako was war and that seemed to be what everyone thought. Mako was the way of the future, bringing electricity to the masses, making their lives easier and better. He fought for this noble purpose and was lauded with medals and honors for his military service. In the end it only brought him pain, blood, fire, and things too horrible to even mention out loud.

Then there was Cloud, a poor sweet innocent kid, always struggling, trying to find his way in life. He always gave everything he had and more, but in the end it wasn't enough. He couldn't change the fact that the universe had condemned him to being the nail for everyone's hammer. Zack didn't even know if Cloud wanted to live, walking through the flames of hell only to find damnation in the end. He only hoped that when Cloud finally came to, he wouldn't look back in anger, wouldn't hate Zack for bringing him back into this world that only brought him pain and suffering.

"Poor bastard," Zack muttered under his breath. Cloud's head was resting on his chest while his hand was lightly clutching the blanket wrapped around them. Pulling Cloud closer, he softly said, "My poor little bastard."

"Did you say something?" Lilleas asked from the other bed. She was watching TV, but it was silent for a moment because she had muted the commercials.

Her voice crept its way into his thick mire of thoughts. "Huh? Oh, it was nothing," Zack replied.

"Oh, okay," she said, only partially believing him. She turned her attention back to the silent TV hoping she might catch some more snippets of conversation.

As he stood up, he carefully removed Cloud from his chest and tucked him under the blanket. Lifting up a frail hand, Cloud reached out towards the air in a weak grasping motion. Helping his friend lower his arm, Zack said, "Go back to sleep kiddo." Kneeling down beside his friend, Zack gave him a few comforting pats. "It's going to be okay. I'm not going anywhere." A weak smile crossed Cloud's face as he twitched and turned into the pillow. Before leaving, Zack said, "Sleep well."

They'd been stuck in this room for a few days now, and Zack's muscles were screaming for action. Finding some space near the door, he started to do some squats. He started out slow to get the blood flowing and work the ache out of his tired muscles. Gradually he increased the pace, feeling the subtle burn of his buttocks and thighs, it was a welcome sensation, much better than being numb.

Just when he'd established a steady pace, Lilleas interrupted, "What ya doing?

Between grunts of exertion, he said, "I'm just doing some squats. Being trapped in this room is making me go crazy. I just had to get up and move."

Without realizing it, her head started to match his movements, up and down, up and down. "Oh, it looks like a lot of work."

"Eh, it's not so bad. It's actually kind of fun."

Quirking an eyebrow, she asked, "you mean kind of fun, like chores are fun?"

"No," he said with a chuckle, "kind of fun, like a party is fun."

"Well, I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but if they're as fun as squats, I don't think I'd want to go." Realizing that Zack was doing nothing interesting, she turned back to the TV, taking it off mute to watch the show.

Now that he was alone, he could finally get a steady rhythm going, concentration was the key to everything. He picked up his speed, and within time the burning feeling in his thighs increased to a blazing fire. It made him feel alive once again, empowered, in control of his body.

Being stored in the Mako tank for months without release had made his muscles weak, and the same thing was true for Cloud. Eventually Zack was going to need to get his friend up and walking again. Not today though, he'd give Cloud one more day of complete rest.

After a few more minutes of doing squats, Lilleas turned her attention back to him. "Wow, you've done a lot of those. Want me to count?"

"Nope," Zack said through a gasping breath.

She paused, staring at him for a while, wondering if he was ever going to stop. It felt akin to watching a pendulum swing, back and forth, over and over until friction slowly brought it to a halt. She figured he had to stop at some time, even if he was a superhuman.

After a few minutes more, he finally came to a stop, panting, breathless. He walked around the room to cool off, allowing the smoldering heat to slowly dissipate. Then he got a glass of water before plopping down in the chair. He tipped his head back against the wall and closed his eyes, melting into the chair, allowing his whole body to relax.

Lilleas seized the opportunity. "Can you tell me about Cloud?" she asked eagerly.

"What do you want to know?" he asked through pants, his voice coming out rough and tired.

"I don't know. . . what was he like?"

Zack looked over at his sleeping friend, calm and peaceful, at least for the moment. Thinking of the old memories they shared brought a hint of a smile to his face. "He was a good kid. You know, hard-working, smart, loyal, nice. He was a bit shy though, and he was picked on a lot, but he could defend himself in a fight."

"Why did people pick on him?" she asked with a trace amount of sadness in her voice.

Shrugging his shoulders he said, "I don't know. I guess because he was different. He never did anything to anybody, unless they asked for it."

They both turned their attention over to Cloud. "Oh man," Zack said with a big grin on his face, "you should have seen his face sometimes when I made him mad."

"I bet it was cute," she said with a sweet smile on her face, small.

His voice seemed a bit distant and weak. "Yeah, that was Spike."

"Tell me a story about you and Cloud."

Zack came back into reality. "A story, huh?" Gesturing a hand towards the TV he said, "You can't find something to watch over there?"

"I'm tired of TV, I want to hear about Cloud," she said with an enthusiastic grin.

Letting out a hearty chuckle, he said, "I guess you really like Cloud. Well, what kind of story do you want to hear?"

"A good one."

"A good one huh?" A cloud appeared on Zack's horizon, and he squinted, trying to see the memories more clearly. "Gaia, there's so many. Me and Cloud go way back. . . "

"Pick one," she said impatiently, interrupting his steady flow of thoughts.

"Hmmm, actually I think I have one you might like." He watched as her eyes widened in anticipation, emerald eyes sparkling in delight. "You know what, I don't think I can share that memory," he said, slightly saddened to see her pert little lips change into a frown.

"Awwww, why not," she whined.

"Eh, I promised Spike I wouldn't tell anyone. It's kind of embarrassing." He tried to suppress a chuckle as the memory started to play out in his head.

"Please, I promise not to tell anyone." She tried to sound as convincing as she could, but the juvenile undertones in her voice made her plea sound insincere.

Zack raised an eyebrow. "You mean you promise not to tell anyone, just like I promised to not tell anyone?"

"Oh," the sound was short and to the point, like the period at the end of a sentence. She scrunched her eyebrows in contemplation as she mulled over his statement. Even though he had a good point, she wasn't going to let him rest until he told her that story. "I promise. Pretty, pretty please, with a cherry on top?"

Zack tilted his chin down, the way adults do to children. With warm green eyes and the bright glow of youth, she looked harmless. Cracking a half-smile, he gave in. "Alright, but that better be a damn good cherry," he said as he stood up. "Why don't you go get me a glass of water. This is going to be a long story."

She was back with the water before he could even get in bed with Cloud. After setting it down on the nightstand, she hopped in the bed and crawled over to Cloud. "Yay, story time!" she said with a beaming smile, so bright it lit up the dingy room for a moment.

"Alright, let me just get Cloud settled here." Picking up his friend's limp body, he set him in his lap and propped him up with a pillow. Running a hand through his friend's hair, Zack spoke softly, "Hey Spike, I'm going to tell a story. Do you remember that time you wore a dress?"

Cloud's body jerked and he pulled his head up. Cold blue eyes flickered with vague recognition as he let out a low whine, the air vibrated with sound.

"Ssssh," Zack hushed his friend, "it's okay. She's not going to tell anyone."

Lilleas grasped Cloud's hand and stroked it softly. "I promise Cloud, I won't tell."

He slowly relaxed into the pillow mumbling incoherent words.

"That's it," Zack soothed while stroking his friend, "just relax and enjoy the story." The memory was still fresh in his mind, like it had happened recently instead of years ago. Turning his attention to Lilleas, he started the tale of, "Zack Charming and His Princess Cloud."

~*~*~*~

_It happened once a year._

_Once a year, President Shinra threw a grand ball and invited all of his rich business friends to attend. Exchanging pleasantries was a cover for the real purpose of the event, which was for Shinra to showcase his SOLDIERs, and he took no shame in parading them around like they were horses in a show._

_Sephiroth was the star of the event, and Shinra expected him to perform for his friends. Needless to say, Sephiroth was not amused. His place was out on the field, not in some extravagant party with President Shinra's stuffy friends fawning all over him. Instead of comforting him, their affection made him cringe and shudder. He was a weapon of war for gods sake, not some animal that was to be used for someone else's amusement! To say it was humiliating was an understatement._

_Every year, it took all of his restraint to keep from bolting out of the party, but Shinra still held the reins of control. Sephiroth had been trained well and knew what was expected of him at public events. He tolerated their grubby hands, but beneath his calm composure the anger simmered. By the end of the evening, his anger boiled over, and he took it out on some poor unsuspecting sap, which usually happened to be Zack._

_The only thing that made the event even tolerable for Sephiroth was the company of his friends, Angeal and Genesis. Unfortunately, they would not be there this year to commiserate with him about the pretentiousness of the whole affair. It was rumored that they had been killed, though Zack and Sephiroth knew the actual truth._

_President Shinra had made plans to explain the sudden disappearance of Genesis and Angeal. Damage control was just as important as the party itself, if not more important. He had already prepared the speech he would present. After weeks of practicing, he had the somber voice down perfectly, just enough sadness to seem sincere, but not an excess amount, which would put a damper on the party. In a well-rehearsed voice, he would say, "Sadly, two of Shinra's finest, Genesis Rhapsodos 1st Class SOLDIER, and Angeal Hewely 1st Class SOLDIER, were killed in the line of duty. We are very sorry for their loss." With the exception of Zack and Sephiroth, everyone would shake their heads in understanding and give him their condolences. It was imperative that everything be perfect for the ball because it could mean the difference between important business deals made or lost. Anyone who was anyone in the business world was attending, along with all ranks of SOLDIER, and the upper crust of the ShinRa Corporation._

_The theme of this year's party was the play, "A Midsummer Night's Dream," something Genesis would have appreciated were he in attendance. It was meant to be very elegant this year, in contrast to the playful theme of last year, "Beach Fun in Costa del Sol." The color scheme for the party was ivory and champagne, with accents of antique gold throughout. Thousands and thousands of roses were imported from Kalm to make the centerpieces. Each one would be an explosion of roses in shades of gold, white, light blush, and cream, dripping with strands of pearls and crystals. In accordance with the theme, custom lighting was temporarily installed in the ballroom to create a rich amber glow. The dinnerware was of the finest silver, crystal, and bone china, which would be set upon gold silk table cloths. No expense was spared and no substitutions were allowed. Shinra and his company were about being the best, and his party would be no less. Now that the big day was almost here, the party planners were working around the clock to make sure that everything was ready according to Shinra's strict specifications._

_~*~*~*~_

_Zack was so excited for the ShinRa Ball that he started preparing a few months ago. This would be his first time attending as a 1st Class SOLDIER, which meant he had to make a good impression on his fellow SOLDIERs. He was no longer a follower, but a leader, and appearances were more important than ever if he wanted to gain everyone's respect. Someday he hoped to be like General Sephiroth, and even though he knew it was only a dream, it didn't stop him from trying._

_It would also be the first time that he was bringing Aerith along as a date. Usually he brought along his current girlfriend, but Aerith was much more than that. She was the girl that had stolen his heart and locked it away forever. Many of his friends had only heard stories about her, so he was looking forward to showing her off. At first she was a bit hesitant about the whole thing. She'd eventually gotten used to the fact that Zack was a SOLDIER, but her instincts still made her feel uncomfortable about going to ShinRa's home base. It took Zack a few rounds of puppy eyes, begging, bribing, and consoling before Aerith finally agreed to go. Even more surprising was the fact that Aerith's mom was letting her go. After a few months of dating Aerith, he managed to charm his way into Elmyra's heart._

_Aerith's mom still watched him like a hawk to make sure he didn't put the moves on her daughter, which is why Zack was pleasantly surprised with the lenient curfew Aerith had been given. She had to be home by midnight, which left quite a bit of time for hanky-panky after the party. If the night went well, the mood was right, and she was comfortable, then he was hoping they'd be able to make love for the first time. Of course he wasn't going to push it, but he figured there was no harm in asking. He'd only been denied every time, so he really had nothing to lose by asking again._

_Being the optimistic sort, he made preparations in the event that she agreed to have sex with him. He had enough condoms and lubrication for several nights of lovemaking because he got a little too excited at the store. He strategically placed vanilla-rose scented candles around the room to create a romantic atmosphere. The candles were pink of course, her favorite color. Unlike its usual messy state, his room was now immaculately clean, even the windows had a streak-free shine. He tried to make everything perfect because he wanted her first time to be special, something she would always cherish._

_Just when it seemed like nothing could go wrong, he got a phone call that was about to change everything. Picking it up, he saw that it was from Aerith, so he started with a cheerful greeting. "Aerith, hi how are you?" Before she could answer he joked, "Can't get enough of me, huh?"_

_What came out from Aerith's side of the phone was a hacking cough as she tried to laugh. Her voice came out raspy and unusually low. "No, well that's not why I called."_

_She was obviously sick which meant. . . Zack's could almost feel his heart stop for a second as he waited for her to drop the bomb._

_"I can't go to the ball. I know it's in two days, but I woke up with a really high fever today and I feel like death warmed over. I have a pounding headache, and I'm afraid I might be stuck in the bathroom all night." With a loud sigh she continued, "I'm really sorry Zack, I know how much it meant to you."_

_His little bubble of hope burst as she delivered the news. She actually had no idea how much it_ really _meant to him. With her mom always around they didn't have many opportunities to have sex, and this event would have been a golden opportunity. The words caught in his throat as he struggled to come up with something acceptable to say. He wanted to whine and complain and ask her to reconsider, but instead he said, "Don't worry about it. It's not your fault. I'll think of something." Deep down in his heart, he knew it wasn't her fault and that she'd feel horribly ill if she went._

_"Why don't you just take another girl?" she asked, her voice laced with a trace amount of sorrow. It was a subtle hint that would have gone unnoticed by most boyfriends, but Zack knew enough about girls to read between lines. What she was really saying was that she would be angry as hell if he took another girl, and she'd give him the silent treatment for a week._

_"No, it's okay," he reassured her. "You're the only girl I want to take." He smiled as he heard her let out a small sigh of relief. "Don't worry about it. I'll figure something out."_

_"Hmmm, can you go by yourself?"_

_"I don't know. You know how the guys are," he groaned, "If I show up without a girl, they'd never let me live it down. From all the wonderful things I've said about you, some of the guys actually think I'm making you up. Besides, I do have a certain reputation for being a stud."_

_Aerith couldn't help but laugh, although it came out sounding more like a snort because of her nasal congestion._

_"What's so funny?" Zack asked while laughing lightly. "You know it's true."_

_"Yes, I know, I know. Thank you for reminding me in case I forgot," she said sarcastically. "Hold on a sec," she said through a light cough. Turning her head away from the phone she let out a few dry coughs and then turned back to the phone. "Sorry about that."_

_"Hey, you okay," Zack asked with genuine concern._

_"Yeah," she coughed out, "I'm fine." After clearing her throat she started again, "Well, why don't you take a friend? I'm sure there's got to be another guy without a date."_

_Zack burst out laughing because taking a guy with him to such a formal event would imply that his friend was his date. Even if he was a homosexual, the ShinRa army had a strict "Don't ask, Don't tell policy," which meant he still had to take a girl with him, unless he wanted to be socially ostracized. Sephiroth seemed to be above this cruel social convention, but that didn't mean he flaunted his relationships out in the open._

_After explaining the situation to her, she said in a defeated voice, "Well I guess you better take another girl then."_

_"Don't worry about it Aerith, I'll figure something out," he said feigning confidence. The last thing he wanted her to do while she was sick was to worry about him. "Listen, why don't you get some rest and I'll swing by later to check up on you."_

_"Thanks Zack," she said sweetly, "I'll be looking forward to it. I love you."_

_"I love you too baby."_

_After hanging up the phone, he threw it on the floor and flopped on his bed. He had about an hour before his meeting with Sephiroth to discuss the logistics of battle for their next mission to Nibelheim, which meant he had time for a quick nap. Everything seemed better after a nap, so he closed his eyes and thought about his grim date prospects for the ball. As he started to drift off, an idea suddenly came to him. He almost dismissed it, but after ruminating about it for a while he realized it would probably work. The more he thought about it, the better the idea became. I'll give him a call when I wake up, Zack thought to himself. Right now I need a nap or I'm going to fall asleep at that meeting._

_~*~*~*~_

_It had been a bad day for Cloud. It was one of those days where nothing seemed to go right, and the harder he tried to fix the situation the worse it became. This morning he woke up late because he over-slept his alarm. None of his roommates bothered to wake him up either, so he missed all of his morning classes. If that wasn't bad enough, he managed to squirt ketchup on his white shirt during lunch. He was on his way home to change out of his ketchup-stained shirt when he got a phone call._

_"Hey it's Zack," Cloud said in surprise as he picked up his phone. It wasn't often that Zack called him, so he was a little excited. Trying not to sound like a gushing fan girl, he tried to answer the phone in a calm voice, "Hello."_

_From the other end of the line, Zack replied, "Hey Cloud, it's me Zack." Zack's voice came out a little more enthusiastic than usual, which caused Cloud to worry. Cloud's initial excitement was replaced by a certain sense of dread because Zack's fervent enthusiasm often led to bad ideas. "Listen, I need a favor."_

_"Okay. . . "_

_"Alright, let me start out by saying I would love you forever if you did this for me."_

_Cloud's stomach churned and twisted in anxiety because he figured it must have been something big if Zack had trouble saying it. At this point, Cloud's voice started to quiver slightly. "Just spit it out Zack."_

_"Will you be my date for the ShinRa Ball?" Before Cloud had a chance to speak Zack continued, "Aerith is really sick and she doesn't want me to take another girl. So how about it buddy?"_

_Cloud paused a moment before answering. "Wait, did you say date? Does that mean I have to dress up like a girl?!"_

_"Perhaps," Zack said trying to play it off as an insignificant detail._

_". . ."_

_"Cloud? Are you still there?" Zack asked_

_"Did you actually expect me to answer that?" Cloud's tone of voice made it obvious that he was annoyed Zack even suggested such a preposterous idea. Why didn't Zack just go ask him to sneak into the Turks' office and pull up some secret files? At least it would have been less embarrassing._

_"Uh, yeah, that's why I asked," Zack replied, pretending to be oblivious to Cloud's irritation. "C'mon, you're my only friend that could pull this off."_

_"Do you mean it's because I look like a girl?" Cloud asked while tightening his grip on the phone. Zack wasn't the first person to insinuate that he was quite feminine looking and it was getting rather tiresome._

_"I didn't' say that, I just meant. . ." Zack pretended to cough into the phone, using it as a distraction. "Excuse me. Anyway, what was I saying?" Before Cloud could answer, Zack answered his own question. "Oh yes, I was talking about how much I need your help. Please?"_

_". . . not interested."_

_Not one to take no for an answer Zack asked, "What do you mean not interested?"_

_Cloud's voice came across strong and irritated, even though it was partially washed out by the static of the phone. "There's no way fuckin' way I'm getting in a dress. That's what not interested means."_

_"Awww, come on Cloud. It won't be so bad. I'm sure you'd look pretty in a dress. C'mon it's not like anyone will recognize you." He expected Cloud to say something, but instead there was silence, and not one of those "Cloud silences," either. Pulling the phone away from his ear, he noticed that Cloud had hung up on him. "Damn." He wouldn't have time to call him back before his meeting with Sephiroth, but he had all evening to work on Cloud. Zack didn't accept no for an answer._

_~*~*~*~_

_In the past few hours Cloud had received numerous phone calls from Zack. He didn't want to listen to Zack's appeals because his friend had a way of making him feel guilty, and that often resulted in him doing something he didn't want to do. It didn't take more than the first two phone calls for Cloud to put his phone on silent mode. He had to give his friend some credit for trying, if anything Zack was persistent._

_He thought that Zack would have given up by bedtime, but he was wrong. While he was sitting on his bed watching TV with his roommate Dustin, he heard a loud knock on the door. As Dustin rose from the bed, Cloud pulled him back down and yelled, "Don't get it!"_

_"What's wrong Cloud? Why don't you want me to answer the door?"_

_"I just have a bad feeling about it, that's all. Just ignore it and it should go away."_

_Dustin gave Cloud the benefit of the doubt, and turned his attention back to the TV._

_The knocking grew louder, and a muffled voice from the other side of the door said, "Hey, it's me Zack. Are you in there Cloud?"_

_"Hey, it's Lieutenant Fair!" Dustin said as he went to go answer the door. Cloud quickly grabbed his friend's arm in an attempt to prevent him from opening the door. Dustin gave his arm a quick shake to rid himself of his friend's grasp. As he started towards the door, Cloud pounced on him, bringing him to the ground. While trying to squirm out of Cloud's hold he asked in annoyance, "Hey man, what's your problem? Isn't Lieutenant Fair your friend?"_

_Tightening his grip, Cloud said, "Yeah, well it's sort of a long story."_

_After a short struggle, Dustin finally freed himself and opened up the door._

_Cloud just lay on the floor, accepting the fact that the universe was against him._

_"Hey Dustin," Zack said with a friendly smile, "you wouldn't happen to know where Cloud is would ya?"_

_Dustin stepped to the side, revealing a disheveled Cloud, face down on the floor. "Tell him I'm not here," Cloud groaned into the carpet._

_"What ya doing on the floor Spike?" Zack asked with a laugh._

_Cloud rolled over and stood up, straightening out his clothes in the process. Purposefully avoiding Zack's gaze he mumbled, "Trying to hide."_

_Zack ignored Cloud's sarcastic comment and turned to Dustin. "Hey, you think you could leave us alone for a few minutes. I have something to ask Cloud and it's strictly confidential."_

_"Yes sir," Dustin said with a salute, "Let me just grab my keys and I'll come back in a little bit." As he walked out the door he said, "See ya later Cloud. Bye Lieutenant Fair."_

_Now that they were alone, Cloud knew the inevitable begging, pleading, and puppy eyes would begin, but he wasn't going to give in this time. Zack had asked him to do some crazy things in the past, but this was by far the most outlandish of them all. Friendship only went so far and dressing up as a girl went beyond the call of duty._

_At least that's what Cloud had told himself. He started out with a firm resolve, but slowly Zack broke him down. Somehow seeing Zack in person made Cloud realize how much his friend really needed his help. That, and Zack the saddest puppy eyes ever, blue eyes wide as saucers with just the right amount of moistness. So Cloud found himself once again agreeing to something that he really didn't want to do. It helped that Zack promised him a meeting with General Sephiroth and agreed to take him out to dinner at least one a week. Being treated to dinner sealed the deal for Cloud because he really disliked mess hall food._

_Caught up in excitement, Zack threw his arms around his friend. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"_

_"Zack?" Cloud gasped into Zack's chest._

_"Yeah buddy?"_

_"I can't breathe. . . "_

_"Oh," Zack laughed, "sorry. I guess I got a little too excited." Releasing Cloud he said, "Meet me at my room tomorrow after lunch around 1 PM. We've got lots to do tomorrow."_

_"Can't wait," Cloud said in sarcasm._

_"Ah, you're such a joker," Zack said as he ruffled his hair. "Alright I'll see ya tomorrow." Pretending to be serious, Zack pointed a finger at him and said, "Don't forget, I know where you live."_

_Zack was already out the door by the time Cloud replied. "Unfortunate, isn't it." Flopping onto his bed, belly down, he spoke into the mattress, "What the hell did I get myself into? It wasn't long before Cloud's imagination took off conjuring up possible scenarios, all of them bad. He just hoped that Zack didn't make him look like a hooker. It couldn't possibly be worse than that, right?_

_~*~*~*~_

_It was already 2 PM and Cloud still hadn't shown up. Zack felt a little silly watching the clock like a girl waiting for her date to show up. He tried watching TV to help him take his mind off of it, but that only made him more cognizant of the fact that he was waiting, so he ended up staring at the clock instead. The room was so silent that he could hear the sharp staccato of the clock's ticking hands._

_Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick. . ._

_Suddenly, there was a soft timid knock at the door. Zack almost jumped out of his seat from excitement and surprise. Pulling himself together so he didn't look like he'd been waiting, he went to open the door._

_"Hey kiddo! You finally made it," Zack said, slapping Cloud on the back._

_Cloud gave a small smile in return as he walked through the door. As he started to explain the reason behind his tardiness, he looked down at the floor out of shame. "Sorry about being late. My roommate forgot his key and. . . "_

_Zack cut him off, "Hey, don't worry about it. As long as you're here it's all good."_

_Now that Cloud wasn't distracted, he noticed something was wrong. Something was different, something was. . . cleaner. Not only was it clean, it was immaculately clean, like Zack had summoned some god of cleanliness to do his bidding. Cloud followed Zack as they walked towards his room, observing everything silently as they proceeded._

_"Hey, you okay?" Zack asked in concern. "You're awfully quiet. Well. . . more quiet than usual."_

_"Yeah, I'm fine."_

_When they got to his room, Zack turned around and saw Cloud avidly exploring his room, like he was a Junon tourist sightseeing in Midgar's upper plate._

_"You okay buddy? You're acting like you've never seen my room before."_

_Picking up a pink scented candle, Cloud smirked, "Looks like someone was planning on getting lucky tonight."_

_Zack let out a large sigh that filled the room with sorrow, a sharp contrast to the lively and bright colors of his room. "Yeah __was. Not anymore. Sorry buddy, but you weren't my first choice."_

_"Thanks for the confidence boost," Cloud half-joked. "Well it's not like I was begging to do this."_

_Cloud had a legitimate point, and the discussion could only go downhill from there so Zack concluded it by saying, "Fair enough. Well I guess we should get started with the dress fitting." Zack bounced over to retrieve his measuring tape and note pad. With a mile-wide grin, he brandished the measuring tape like it was a weapon and said, "Now, let's get you measured for that dress."_

_Zack had the ability to turn even an ordinary item into a dangerous weapon, so Cloud didn't know how to react. Taking a cautionary step back, he said in a hesitant voice, "You're just going to measure me right?"_

_Zack cracked the tape measure in the air like it was a whip and playfully said, "Yeah, what'd you think I was going to do with it?." He started barking out orders like they were on the field, "All right, let's start at the top. Hold your arms out so that I can measure your chest."_

_Instead of fumbling around with the tape measure, like most guys, Zack had it wrapped around Cloud's chest in one smooth motion. It was obvious that he'd had prior experience before. Cloud repressed the urge to squirm because he felt a little uncomfortable being so close to Zack. Aiming for a distraction he asked, "Hey, where'd you learn how to measure for dresses?"_

_"Oh, this?" he asked while writing down the measurement. Rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment he answered, "My mom was a seamstress in Gongaga. Every now and then I helped her with measurements and fabric cutting. It was a long time ago though, so it's no big deal."_

_"No big deal?" With a mischievous gleam in his eyes, Cloud mocked him, "I can't believe I'm standing in the presence of the almighty Zack Fair, Dress Maker 1st Class."_

_"Hey, it's Zack Fair, SOLDIER 1st Class to you, Miss Strife," Zack retaliated._

_They both looked at each other for an awkward second, imagining one another in a frilly dress with ruffles, and burst into laughter. Eventually, they both calmed down enough for Zack to resume taking measurements. He still had to measure Cloud's waist, hips, and girth. As Zack went to measure his friend's hips, Cloud's eyes narrowed in challenge. "If you go anywhere near my dick I'll kick your ass."_

_Zack scoffed, "You kick _my_ ass? You're joking right?"_

_Cloud's voice was sharp as he said, "I mean it Zack." If words were knives, Zack would have been quartered and disemboweled on the spot._

_Zack paused for a second, looked into Cloud's cold menacing gaze, and decided to not take his chances. "Alright, I guess we'll skip that measurement. Let's move onto accessories."_

_"Accessories?" Cloud squeaked out, like a child about to get a dose of a foul tasting medicine. "What do you mean accessories?"_

_Letting out a hearty chuckle, Zack asked, "What, you though it was just the dress? Sorry friend, we've only just begun." Without pausing to address Cloud's concerns, he started reading off the accessories list that Aerith helped him make. "Now hair. We've got to do something about that messy mop of yours." Zack walked over to Cloud and started grabbing random spikes and moving them around in an attempt to create a feminine hair style. The whole time Cloud fidgeted like a child getting their hair brushed. With a sigh of disappointment, Zack said, "Looks like we can't do much of anything with this. How about a wig?"_

_"A wig?"_

_"Yep. Ever wanted to be a brunette? Brown hair is fun and flirty," he said with a wry grin, thinking of Aerith._

_"Blonde hair is fine," he groaned._

_"Okay, moving onto shoes. How about heels? " Zack waggled his eyebrows as he added, "Tall women are sexy."_

_". . . . "_

_"So I guess that's a no. How about those flat shoes without a heel?" Zack asked, trying to drown out Cloud's dour mood with cheerfulness and optimism._

_". . . fine," he said with a dramatic sigh. He felt the need to continually remind Zack that he didn't enjoy doing this._

_Smacking his palm on his forehead, Zack said, "I can't believe I almost forgot this. Cup size, what size boobs do you want?"_

_"Huh?" Cloud's head was still spinning. It was now just starting to hit him. He was actually going to be in a dress as he encountered some of the top ranking officers at the ball. At the moment, he couldn't think of anything more embarrassing than being in a dress as he met Sephiroth for the first time. For a few seconds he thought about reconsidering, but then logic kicked in and reminded him that the ball was tomorrow, and Zack probably wouldn't be able to find another guy stupid enough to dress up like a girl. He couldn't just abandon his friend like that._

_Waving his hand in front of Cloud, Zack said, "Calling Cloud. Come back to Gaia. Are you there Cloud?"_

_"Huh? Oh sorry, I guess I was just thinking about something."_

_Zack got right back to where they left off. "So we were talking about bra size. I suggest you go with a size D, but you could get away with a size C if you're uncomfortable with it_

_Size C, Cloud mused, why did that sound familiar? Oh Gaia, that was Tifa's bra size! He'd overheard it at school when some boys were gossiping about the fact that her chest was rather large for a thirteen year old. He was going to be fairly well-endowed if he was wearing a size larger than a C cup. As he thought about Tifa's chest, he could feel the heat creeping into his cheeks and turning them a rosy shade of pink. Turning away to hide his embarrassment, he asked, "Wait, why do I have to have. . ." he paused a second before continuing, the words had a strange taste in his mouth, awkward and unfamiliar, "a large bosom."_

_"Bosom?" Zack asked before cracking up into laughter. "You sound like my grandmother." Getting inches away from Cloud's face, he breathed the word on his friend, slow and seductive, "Breasts." Taking a step back, his voice returned to normal, "Does that make you feel uncomfortable?"_

_Cloud fixed a mask of determination on his face with clenched teeth and flaring nostrils. His voice came out cold, like steel, "No."_

_"No?" Zack smirked, "Then why don't you say it with me?" He started a chant, each sound just like the next, but louder each time. "Breast, breast, breast, breast, breast, breast, breast, breast, breast,. . . "_

_Zack had pushed him over the edge, so Cloud screamed, "Breasts!" Exasperated, he looked up at Zack. "There, is that what you wanted to hear?!"_

_"Whoa, what's wrong with you? Were you dropped on your head as a kid?" Zack joked darkly._

_"No, but I can't say the same about you."_

_Zack pat his friend on the shoulder with a smile. "You're funny Spike, you know that? You shouldn't take things so hard. It might make the guys tease you less." His hand stalled on Cloud's shoulder, gripping firmly, an act of reassurance. "I'm looking out for you, kid."_

_Cloud's face softened, but his voice was still tense. "Is that why you're putting me in a dress? You're looking out for me?"_

_"Hey, I got you a date on Saturday night to the biggest party in town, hell, the world. I wouldn't be complaining if I were you."_

_Cloud gave his friend an exaggerated eye roll, which Zack chose to ignore._

_"Anyway, back to breasts, what size do you want to be? Remember, bigger is better." Pointing his pen in the middle of Cloud's chest he said, "Oh, but if you go too big it's not really believable."_

_"The smaller size I guess," Cloud shrugged._

_"Nah, I think you need a size D. Not too big and not too small." Cloud still looked concerned, so Zack continued, "Trust me, I've unsnapped enough bras to know what I'm talking about."_

_"Somehow that doesn't reassure me," Cloud mumbled._

_Zack moved down the rest of the list while Cloud sighed, groaned, and fidgeted. Much to Cloud's chagrin, Zack added several more accessories to his ensemble, including pantyhose and a purse. However, Zack did offer to buy everything and go shopping alone. Not that Cloud would have gone anyway, but it was a nice gesture on Zack's part._

_As Cloud made his way to the door, Zack tossed him a magazine, throwing it in a gentle upward arc. "Here catch."_

_Straightening out the crinkled cover, Cloud realized Zack had just given him a porn magazine. Raising it up, he asked, "What's this for?"_

_"Oh, it's just something from my stash." His voice cracked in embarrassment over the last few words. "I thought it might help you feel more like a man after this whole thing."_

_Cloud didn't quite know how to react. It was a bit embarrassing to be given a porn magazine from Zack, Lieutenant of the world's most powerful army. "Uh, yeah, thanks." Wanting to show his appreciation, he tried to smile, but it came out as a misshapen squiggle._

_Zack's laughter broke through the awkwardness and made both men smile. "Alright, take it easy. Anyway, I'll see ya tomorrow at 5 o'clock."_

_Still flustered, Cloud looked down at the floor as opened the door and said, "See ya tomorrow."_

_~*~*~*~_

_When Cloud came over the next day, Zack was a whirlwind of excitement and cheerfulness. He was acting more like a puppy whose master just came home, than a top commanding officer of the world's largest military. Before Cloud could even say hello, Zack had placed the dress and accessories in his hands and ordered him to get changed._

_On his way to the bathroom, Cloud noticed that Zack was dressed in something entirely different. Instead of his normal dark pants, suspenders, and sleeveless sweater, Zack was dressed in a dapper white military jacket and fitted pants. On the right side of his jacket there were several rows of rectangles denoting the many awards he had won for his service in the military. He also had a few other pins and other adornments that Cloud couldn't figure out._

_The little green monster of jealousy that lurked beneath the surface reared its ugly head. Cloud started ruminating about the fact that Zack seemed to have it all. He was in SOLDIER, had an awesome girlfriend, friends, money, honor, and prestige. Not only that, but he was the nicest guy in the universe. Gaia, it just didn't seem fair. It didn't take Cloud too long to realize that he was thinking about it in the wrong way. He silenced the little green monster by telling himself that he was lucky to even be friends with such an awesome guy. Zack was the kind of guy that would take a bullet for a friend, so maybe dressing up as a girl wasn't so bad. After all Zack had done for him, he felt a little satisfaction in the fact that he was finally able to help Zack out._

_Once he was in the bathroom, Cloud took a look at the bundle of clothing Zack had handed him, and he was pleasantly surprised that Zack had bought him a midnight blue dress. If the dress was a bright candy-pink, he might have just ditched Zack before even putting on the dress. Some things were not up for negotiation, like wearing pink._

_The first thing he did was figure out how everything worked. The dress didn't look complicated, but he'd never worn a bra before, or pantyhose for that matter. Then there were two bags of vanilla pudding, which he was clueless about. He resolved to put everything on first and then maybe their usage would become more apparent._

_After putting everything on, he was a bit scared to look in the mirror. He'd stepped off to the side so that he could purposefully avoid seeing his reflection. It shouldn't have mattered because no one would recognize him, but he didn't want to be an ugly girl. There was nothing strange about that, was there? Then there was still the issue of the vanilla pudding. . ._

_"Hey Zack," Cloud yelled out, "what's the pudding for?"_

_Zack got up close to the door and spoke through the thick wood, "Those are for your boobs."_

_"My what?!"_

_"Your boobs, you know, stuff 'em in your bra."_

_Cloud looked down and suddenly noticed that his bra didn't fit right. Even with the padding, there was still a gaping hole that needed to be filled with something, but pudding? "Why couldn't you have used socks?"_

_"This is much more realistic looking. Just don't let anyone feel you up and you'll be fine," Zack reassured him._

_"You sure?" Cloud asked in a meek voice._

_"Yes," Zack said in a soothing voice, like he was trying to comfort his paranoid girlfriend. "Now stuff 'em in and come on out so I can get a look at you."_

_After a bit of rustling, the door slowly opened and Cloud peeked out, his long blonde hair framing his face nicely._

_"It's okay," Zack said encouragingly, "I'm the only one here."_

_"That's what I'm afraid of," Cloud grumbled. "Don't laugh at me or I won't be your date. My self-confidence isn't the best, even before I did this."_

_Cloud stepped out of the bathroom in a large clunky movement, unbefitting of the pretty girl he now appeared as. He noticed that Zack was staring at him, eyes wide with amusement and something else he couldn't figure out . It was hard to tell because he'd never seen Zack look at him like that. Shaking himself out of whatever fantasy world he was in, Zack moved Cloud over to the full length mirror in his bedroom._

_With a big smile, Zack presented Cloud to the mirror and asked, "So, what do you think?"_

_Cloud paused for a while to take in the whole of his reflection. The dark blue dress made his eyes stand out, and complemented the blonde wig nicely, making it shimmer a golden blonde. Unlike his usual spikes, he now had soft shoulder-length curls, which softened the angular nature of his face. __The dress had long arms to disguise his burgeoning biceps, and it was floor-length, which helped cover up his hairy legs and thick manly ankles. His ample bosom helped detract from his shoulders, which were broader than a woman's, though not quite as expansive as Zack's. He never really thought about it, but he had a cute behind, lean but muscular and slightly round. In short he looked. . ._

_". . . hot!" Zack blurted out. Cloud was still admiring himself in the mirror when Zack ordered him to get ready to leave. Cloud grabbed his purse, waiting by the front door while Zack made sure everything was turned off, and the house was safe before leaving. Smacking Cloud on the butt, Zack said, "Come on sweet cheeks, let's get moving. We don't want to be late."_

_Cloud scowled and punched his friend in the arm._

_Zack just chuckled and dismissed Cloud's anger saying, "You hit like a girl."_

_Out of all the things he could have said, he had to say that, Cloud thought. Cranking back his shoulder, he summoned his accumulated anger and threw a much more forceful punch._

_Zack yelped in pain. "Owww," Zack said as he rubbed his tender bicep, "that one actually hurt."_

_As he listened to Zack complain, he smiled. There was nothing more satisfying then delivering a little bit of pain to his friend, especially when he deserved it._

_In a low seductive voice Zack leaned over and purred, "You know, you're pretty feisty for a girl. I like that in a woman."_

_Rolling his eyes, Cloud responded, "Oh gods Zack, stop being such a pervert."_

_"What you mean like this?" Zack said playfully as he spanked Cloud again, but much harder this time._

_Cloud yelped in pain. Even through the dress layers, Zack packed quite a wallop in his spankings. He was going to have a bright red handprint on his ass the next morning, and it took all his effort not to rub his sore butt cheek. The last thing he wanted to do was give Zack even more of a reason to tease him. "That's it," Cloud snorted, "I'll see ya there." He picked up the front of his floor length dress and started running towards the ballroom. He felt like a princess in a fairy tale, running away from the villain. It was a very unsettling feeling for many reasons._

_Zack hooted and hollered as Cloud ran away, thoroughly enjoying himself._

_Cloud slowed down once he realized that Zack wasn't pursuing him. Looking over his shoulder, he shouted, "Fuck you Zack!" As soon as the statement made it out of his mouth, he immediately regretted his choice of words._

_Cupping a hand over his mouth, Zack yelled, "Maybe later tonight." After a brief pause he added, "If you're lucky." To torture his friend even more he yelled, "Once you go Zack, you never go back!"_

_The faint echo of Zack's laughter made its way down the empty hall. Cloud could feel his cheeks redden with both anger and embarrassment. Being mindful of the wig he was wearing, he gently shook his head in resignation as he wondered why in Shiva's name he agreed to go along with Zack's stupid idea. Zack owed him big for this! He would have never agreed to dress up like a girl if he knew Zack would act like a horny teenage boy. Now he realized that all the rumors about Zack were true. He really would hit on_ anything _with boobs in a dress, which included Cloud in his current padded-bra state and floor length dress._

_Cloud kept running as fast as his legs would carry him, trying to put as much distance as possible in between him and Zack, the raging inferno of testosterone. Unfortunately for Cloud, this was only the beginning of a long night._

~*~*~*~

Trying to talk through a big yawn, Zack mumbled, "Well I think that's it for tonight. What do you say Spike?" There was no response so Zack gave his friend a gentle shake. "Cloud? Are you asleep already?"

As if answering his question, Cloud let out a light snore.

Zack chuckled, "Well, I guess that's a yes."

"Awww, but I have to find out what happens to Cloud at the ball," Lilleas whined, insistent and demanding.

"I guess you'll just have to wait till tomorrow. Cloud and I are going to bed."

Putting on a pout, she asked, "You promise?"

"Promise? That's a bit much for a story."

Her eyes started to become wet and glassy, threatening tears if he didn't promise to finish the story.

"Alright," he said in defeat, "I promise I'll finish the story tomorrow."

She erupted in a loud cheer, "Yay!"

Cloud jerked in Zack's arms, raising his head up, blinking a few times before going limp once more.

"Ssssh, be careful," Zack warned, "we don't want to wake him up."

"Oh, sorry," she said in a light whisper before giggling. After pressing a kiss on Cloud's forehead, she said, "Goodnight, I'll see ya tomorrow."

"Goodnight Lilleas." As he tucked Cloud into bed, he mused upon the fact that tomorrow was another day. No matter how bad the day went, the sun would always rise the next day. Life would go on and tomorrow he'd still be stuck telling Lilleas that stupid story.

~*~*~*~

The night fell upon them suddenly, like a light switch had been flipped, turning the sky from light to dark, day to night. Johnny and Ashwin hadn't much time left if they wanted to catch those specimens. For all they knew, the two specimens might have already left town. The sooner they could find them, then the sooner they could finish this mission and go home.

Yesterday, after the good news at the grocery store, Johnny was so excited that he drug Ashwin all over town, trying to find motels and hotels. By nightfall, they'd only managed to investigate four of the approximately forty motels in town. They needed to pick up the pace if they were ever going to find the specimens in a timely manner. So they packed it up for the night, went to a motel and formulated a plan for the next few days.

The plan was to check out at least fifteen motels a day, but Johnny's expectations were a bit high, unrealistic. Much to Johnny's chagrin, today they only managed to make it to nine of the fifteen motels. He blamed it on the hour lunch break Ashwin insisted upon, but in the end they both knew it didn't make a difference.

Since it was too dark to continue, they ended their search for the day and called it a night. Unfortunately, their search turned up fruitless, not even as much as another clue was found. Gloomy and dejected, they headed back to their motel. Johnny was particularly upset, because this mission was of great importance to him.

Failure, Johnny had always been labeled as a failure, and this was his one chance to do something right, perhaps even make it into SOLDIER. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he failed just one more time. He was orphaned at five, doing drugs at twelve, dropped out of school at sixteen, selling drugs at eighteen, and saw his brother killed at twenty, an innocent victim. It's hard to keep your chin up with a record like that. After his brother's death, he made the decision that he was going to turn his life around. He was going to join the Shinra military and 'be all that he could be.' Five years so far, and he'd seen enough blood and guts to make several horror movies, watched one too many friends die in his arms, and pulled the trigger that ended a life just one too many fuckin' times. Not this time though, he was going to prove himself by finding those specimens, even if it was the last thing he did. He'd rather be remembered as a dead hero than a living failure.

Ashwin was a good companion for Johnny because he helped keep things in perspective. He was a happy guy, laid back, the one you always knew you could call on if you had a problem. Unlike Johnny, Ashwin had a fairly normal life. Growing up, everything about his life had just been normal, mediocre, boring. He joined the military after high school because he wanted some excitement in his life, and he didn't want to be a plumber like his father. Eventually he fell in love, got married, and had a baby. He was living proof of the 'Midgarian dream,' so to speak.

They were two young men from very different backgrounds, but for now, they were just two buddies on a mission, walking back to their motel room. It had been silent for a while, Johnny was usually the one to initiate conversation, but he wasn't feeling very talkative after today's failure. He eventually pushed his worries aside, and broke through the silence. "Hey Ashwin, how's the baby doing?"

With a long sigh he started. "Jenny says the baby's been crying a lot lately. Thinks it might be an ear infection. She's taking her to the doctor tomorrow."

"Ouch," he said as he scrunched up his face in an imitation of pain. "That's got to hurt. Being a baby is kind of tough."

"Yeah, well being the one that changes the diapers isn't so easy either," Ashwin smirked.

"I hear ya on that one," Johnny said.

"So, how's your girlfriend Liza?" asked Ashwin

"Oh you know, she's doing okay. She's been sad since I've been gone on so many missions recently. I wish she knew how much I care about her. I'd rather be with her than with you." Johnny gave his friend the once over, making a face of disgust as he paused at his friend's face.

Giving his friend a friendly punch, Ashwin said, "Get out of here man. You know I'm a much better lover than Liza ever was."

"In your dreams," Johnny retorted.

"Your mom's in my dreams,"

Johnny chucked. "You're lame, stealing my jokes like that." After a pause he continued, "I guess I deserved that one."

"Yeah," Ashwin released a small laugh, and then sighed, "I guess so."

Looking over at his friend, Johnny put on a serious expression, trying to convey the sincerity of his words. "You really miss your family don't you?"

Biting his bottom lip, Aswhin gave a slow nod. "Yeah. . . "

The two men lingered in the silence of the night, with the crunch of the gravel under their feet, and the howl of the wind being their constant companions. More was said in those few moments of silence than in the whole day.

Finally, Johnny spoke up, "Don't worry Ashwin, we'll find those bastards tomorrow."

Ashwin cracked a smile. "What is this, another _feeling_ of yours?"

"Asshole," Johnny grumbled. "Here I was being all nice to you for once."

"Yeah, you'd hate to make that mistake again," Ashwin teased.

Johnny threw his hands up in the air in defeat. "Like I said, I'll be glad when this mission is over."

Little did they know that their wishes were about to come true, and in ways they didn't even imagine.

~*~*~*~

Author's Note: A big thanks to my dear **Cookiecat **for her help on this flashback! Without her it probably wouldn't have happened. I told her that I wanted Zack to take Cloud to the ball dressed up as a girl, how do I justify it? She told me all that I needed to know ^_^ She also helped me revise a big chunk of it. **Blue Jae** and **Mint** helped a lot with the ideas for the flashback, and **Blue Jae** beta read this chapter for me. Thanks **Blue Jae**! I've wanted to put Cloud in a dress for a while. Lol. The flashback was only supposed to be 4,000 words but it quickly grew to 10,000. I just had too much fun with it. The second half will be in the next chapter. I've already written most of it. I'm not sure if anyone cares, but I'll post weekly status updates on which story I'm currently writing and my progress. Just look for the Bunny on my profile page and it will be under that. Not the avatar bunny, this one!

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	19. Chapter 19

**Rating: Mature.** Okay, let me explain this one. This chapter is more like in between a Teen and a Mature rating, and it concerns the flashback. Zack convinces Cloud to wear a dress . There's some sexual undertones, but no sex, kissing, yaoi, etc. Cross-dressing just seemed like a bit of an adult concept.

**Chapter 19**

It was sunny outside and warm with a cool summer breeze. In the distance, he saw her, pink fluid contours and warm chestnut brown hair. The lilies surrounding her leaned palely into the wind, bowing down before her, a rainbow of pastels waiting at her feet. Enrobed with light, and haloed by a crown of red roses, she looked even more beautiful than he remembered. She was on her knees with hands clasped together, praying for redemption. In the trees, the starlings echoed her prayer, twittering joyfully and fluttering from branch to branch.

He walked towards her, the fresh grass reluctantly squishing under his boots. He called out to her, "Aerith!"

She stopped praying, turned to look at him, and smiled. "Zack!"

Unable to contain his excitement, he started running towards her. Taking one step, two steps, then ten steps at a time, he was making record strides and closing the distance between them quickly. She was cheering him on, "Zack! Zack! Zack!"

He was wearing a bright smile, so brilliant it could have lit up the entire city of Midgar. Nothing was going to stop him now.

Then the starlings took to the sky and sounded the alarm. Within seconds, the earth shook violently and threw Zack down on the ground. Hairline fissures quickly spread throughout the land and opened up into large crevices that threatened to swallow them whole.

Once he managed to gain stable footing, he searched for Aerith. She was on the other side of a large gaping hole, so big that even Sephiroth would have trouble bounding over it. Tears filled her eyes, and she cried out to him, "Zack!" The planet quaked and shuddered, but she wasn't done with her outburst yet.

Another wave of seismic energy rolled through the ground and tossed up loose plant material and rocks. Zack screamed, but it was too late. The shower of debris rained down on Aerith and knocked her out cold. Beside her was the halo, red petals strewn and torn asunder, the planet was bleeding.

Pushing all fears aside, he took a running leap over the dark chasm. His eyes never left her as he made the jump. He almost made it, but he was a foot away from the edge as he came down, so he threw his arms out in haste and grabbed onto the edge of the precipice. He scrambled to find some kind of foot-hold, anything that would aid him in hoisting himself up over the edge. The grass was slick so he dug his fingers deep into the dirt.

Another strong rumble came, but the force was too much, and he lost his grip. The planet's gaping maw devoured him as he fell into darkness.

A voice followed his descent. "Zack. Zack." It was weak at first, but as the darkness faded into light the voice became louder, "Zack. Zack, c'mon wake up."

He opened his eyes only to be greeted by the image of Lilleas hovering above him. "You must have been in some deep sleep. I've been trying to wake you up for the past five minutes."

Propping himself up on his elbows, he warily took in his surroundings. "Why am I on the floor?" He looked over at Lilleas, but she looked even more perplexed than he was. Shortly after sitting up, a throbbing pain pulsed through his head, and he winced in pain. Slowly, he lowered himself back to the ground, and pressed his forefingers against his temples. He closed his eyes to block out the sharp rays of morning light.

"Hey, you okay?" Lilleas asked with concern. She sat back on her heels to give Zack some breathing room.

"Yeah," Zack groaned, "just a little headache. I think it might have something to do with being kicked out of the bed."

She echoed his thoughts, "Kicked out of the bed? I don't remember hearing anything last night."

"Yeah, I had this crazy dream last night that I was kicked out of bed, but I guess it wasn't a dream." Zack tried sitting up again, but this time he slowly opened his eyes as they accommodated to the light.

"You think Cloud did it?" she asked incredulously.

Zack smirked, like it was an inside joke. "Wouldn't be the first time he's done it. He's got restless legs, and it doesn't help that we've been cooped up in this place for a while." Squinting, he pointed at the liquid acetaminophen bottle on the far table. "Lilleas could you please get that for me?"

"Sure." As she stood up, she looked over at Cloud who appeared to be sleeping peacefully, but the blankets were in a heap and bunched up around him, like he'd run a marathon during his sleep. Zack seemed like a tough guy, but maybe Cloud was tougher. She couldn't help the giggle that escaped her lips, which inspired a loud groan from Zack.

"Lilleas, could you please stop looking at Cloud and just get the medicine."

"Oh, s-s-sorry," she stammered. Blushing profusely, she picked up the medicine and a clean plastic spoon. Without another word, she walked over and gave them to Zack.

He accepted the medicine, but pushed away the spoon saying, "Nah, I don't need that." She watched as he hassled with the childproof cap before opening the bottle and taking a big slug of medicine.

After their earlier exchange, Lilleas was feeling a bit more timid than normal. "I don't mean to be rude or anything, but isn't that kind of dangerous to take medicine without measuring it."

Screwing the cap back on the medicine, he leveled his gaze with her and said, "You know, after all the things I've been through, this is the least of my worries. I've got so many chemicals in me, I feel like a toxic waste dump."

Lilleas narrowed her eyes in contemplation. There was a lot of information about their past that Zack was keeping relatively guarded. She made a mental note to ask him about it later. "Well, you measure it for Cloud don't you?"

Looking over at his sleeping friend, Zack let out a big sigh. "Yeah, well he's not doing so well."

Realizing she may have overstepped her bounds, she said, "Oh, I'm sorry."

"What? Oh, it's not your fault. Don't worry, he'll get better. It just takes time."

"Yeah. . . "

"Hey, I'm sorry I snapped at you earlier. Headaches bring out the worst in me." Trying to show he meant no harm, he gave her a small smile.

She smiled back, and all was forgiven for the moment. Purposefully changing the subject, she asked, "Hey, is it story time yet?"

"Story time?" He chuckled, "I just got up."

"Please?"

"Well, I was going to go back to sleep for a bit and see if this headache goes away." Zack walked over to the bathroom and Lilleas followed a step behind, but stopped outside as he shut the door.

She waited outside. As he emerged with a large glass of water, she pounced on him with her question, "How about story time after your nap?"

He delayed answering by taking a large gulp of water. After swallowing, he looked over his shoulder to see if she was still there, and she was right behind him with a smile. "You sure are insistent," he said with slight amusement. She smiled proudly as if it were a compliment. "Alright, after my nap I'll finish the story. "

Clasping her hands together, she cheered, "Yay!"

Zack climbed into bed with Cloud and wrapped him in a surprise bear-hug from behind. "You think you're such a tough guy, attacking me in my sleep. Well, how's it feel, huh?"

Cloud started squirming and thrashing about, but Zack held onto him tightly.

Lilleas' eyes got large as she watched from the side. It all happened so fast. "What are you doing? You're not hurting him are you?"

"No," Zack grunted, "we're just having a little fun."

Giving him a disapproving look she said, "It doesn't look like fun." The tension in the room made the furniture cow under its weight, and the air became thick and heavy. She was still worried and found herself moving closer to Cloud, ready to step in if necessary. She hadn't even stopped to consider the simple fact that she was no match for Zack.

Finally, Zack let go and Lilleas started breathing normally again. Both men were flat on their backs, panting and breathless.

After a minute or two, Zack caught his breath. Then he straightened out the covers, making sure that both he and Cloud were fully covered. "So Spike, are you going to kick me out of the bed again?" Cloud gave a low grunt. "Good boy," Zack said, patting his arm. Then he turned over on his side, facing Lilleas. "Alright, wake me up in an hour, would ya?"

"Sure."

Zack closed his eyes, and shortly after Cloud rolled over and rested his forehead against the base of his neck. Zack smiled as he fell asleep.

~*~*~*~*~

When Zack woke it was silent. The blaring green light of the clock indicated 12:00. He closed his eyes to go back to sleep when he realized he'd been asleep for three hours. He looked around the room and saw that Lilleas was tucked into bed, peacefully asleep. "So that's what happened," Zack mused. Upon rising, he said, "It's time to get up." Turning over to Cloud, he said, "Hey buddy, it's time to wake up." Cloud groaned and rolled over to the other side. "Not so fast," Zack said sitting him up. "C'mon you can't sleep all day."

Then he got out of bed and went over to wake up Lilleas. She woke up, confused and disoriented. "Huh, what time is it?" She glanced over at the clock. "Three hours? Oh, I'm so sorry. I was just resting my eyes."

Zack replied, "Hey, don't worry about it. Why don't you help me feed Cloud, and then I'll tell the story."

"Right," she nodded.

Zack got the condensed milk while Lilleas went to get a towel and fixed it into a make-shift bib for Cloud. Mealtime went over without a fuss, and they were one step closer to the story.

Before starting, Zack got a refill on his water glass, and Lilleas came and sat beside Cloud. When Zack came back to the bed, he sat on the other side of Cloud so he was sandwiched in-between. "Alright, it's time to start that story. Let's see, where was I?"

"Oh, I remember, you were being a jerk to poor Cloud." Lilleas fished for Cloud's hand, grabbed it up, and squeezed it reassuringly.

"Right," Zack smirked, "how could I forget?" Zack picked up the story from where he left off the day prior. "So after. . .

~*~*~*~*~

_. . . being teased, taunted, and Zack-handled, Cloud was thoroughly pissed off. At the moment he wasn't sure how he was going to handle the situation, but he knew that something needed to be done before things spiraled out of control. It was only the beginning of the night, and Zack had already spanked him and insinuated sexual relations. If it got much worse. . . Cloud shuddered as his mind drifted off into the possibilities that the night held in store. Yes, something definitely needed to be done. Cloud wasn't the type to discipline a superior officer, but he figured that wearing a dress for said officer certainly entitled him to some benefits, like disciplining him for inappropriate behavior, even if he was a 1__st__ Class SOLDIER. _

_He found a secluded area behind a tall potted plant to bide his time because he didn't want to attract attention. The last thing he wanted was to be the 'gossip du jour' on tomorrow's "Shinra Daily." Being labeled as Zack Fair's feisty date was nothing he aspired to._

_Zack strolled up to the ballroom in an easy stride and realized upon entering that he didn't know where his date was. After doing a quick scan of the room for blonde spikes, he couldn't find his friend, which made him realize that that Cloud no longer had his infamous hair-do. "Guess I better call him," Zack mumbled to himself. _

_Moving to the side of the ballroom, Zack whipped out his phone and dialed Cloud's number, "Hey, where are you?"_

_After making sure that he wasn't being watched, Cloud replied into the phone, "I'm behind a tall plant on the outside of the building."_

_Zack couldn't help himself as the words came out quicker than his self control. "Playing hard to get, eh?" He heard a loud groan on the other side of the phone followed by silence. "Guess he doesn't know how to have a little fun," he humphed._

_It didn't take Zack long to find his friend once he made it outside. Even without the blonde spikes, Cloud still stood out from the crowd. As Zack approached him, he noticed that Cloud looked rather upset, and for some reason, his dour expression reminded him of the time Aerith got mad at him for stepping on her flowers. Eyebrows knitted in anger, lips upturned in a petulant frown, and arms crossed below the chest; it was the look of a woman scorned. A gut feeling kicked in and warned him to turn the other way, but it was too late because he had already been spotted._

_Now that Zack was within reach, Cloud hit him with his purse_

"_Owww," Zack groaned, rubbing his arm. "What was that for?!"_

_Cloud cranked back his purse, ready to administer a deserved second beating._

_Zack put out a hand out to stop the impending attack and said, "Okay, okay, I get your point. Earlier, I was a bit. . . "_

"_. . . of an ass," Cloud responded sharply._

"_Yeah, okay. I guess I deserved that." With a sigh he started again, "Look I'm sorry." Reaching out a hand, he gave one of his genuine smiles. "Friends?"_

_Cloud looked at Zack's smile, narrowed his eyes in contemplation, and took the proffered hand. "Yeah, friends."_

"_That's it, now give me a hug."_

_Before Cloud could protest, Zack enveloped him in a warm embrace. For a moment it almost felt nice, warm, strong, and sheltering. Then Zack opened his mouth, "Wow, those tits really do feel real." Stepping back, he took a look at Cloud's chest and proudly said, "I did a damn good job."_

_This earned him another wallop from Cloud's purse._

"_Sweet Shiva! What did you put in that thing, lead?"_

"_Sort of," Cloud smirked, "Before we left, I took one of your weights and stuffed it in my purse. Self-defense."_

"_What do you need self-defense for when you have me? You scared I won't protect you?"_

"_When I said self-defense, I was referring to you," Cloud said dryly, keeping his eyes straight ahead._

"_Who me? I'm always a gentleman," Zack said, half-jokingly. _

"_Yeah right. . . " Cloud grumbled._

"_Hey, it's not my fault if you look hot enough to be a centerfold model." Zack lapsed back into that tone of voice that made Cloud's skin crawl. _

_Clenching his fists, he tried to refrain from throwing a fit. "That's it, as soon as we get back to your place I'm taking this dress off."_

_Leaning in close to the blonde, Zack growled, "So, you've considered my offer for the night."_

_They were inside of the ballroom now, so instead of giving his friend another hard helping of purse, he elbowed him sharply._

"_Kidding!" Zack yelped. A few heads turned at the loud verbal intrusion, and Cloud shrunk into himself at the unwanted attention. Zack leaned over and whispered, "Damn. You need to loosen up a bit or you'll get your panties in a knot."_

"_Let's put you in a dress and see how happy you are," Cloud hissed._

_Zack shut up for the moment, which ushered in a reticent period of calm. Now that it was quiet, Cloud finally had a chance to notice the grandeur of the ballroom. Authentic crystal chandeliers dangled from the ceiling, a five piece orchestra played at the front of the room, elaborate centerpieces decorated the tables, ice sculptures of Sephiroth and Zack stood proudly. Wait, Zack? Cloud did a double-take, checking to make sure that his eyes weren't deceiving him. Sure enough, there was an ice sculpture of Zack on the table opposite Sephiroth. Being friends with Zack, he sometimes lost perspective and forgot how famous his SOLDIER friend really was. _

_Noticing that his friend was staring at something, Zack clapped the blonde's shoulder and asked, "What ya looking at?" Then he noticed the direction of Cloud's gaze, and spotted the ice sculpture of himself. "Whoa, that's awesome! That's me up there by General Sephiroth. Would it look too obvious if I went over there and took a picture of it?"_

_Zack's inane comments sent Cloud hurtling back to Earth. "Yes."_

"_Yeah, I guess you're right," Zack agreed. Just then, he looked away from the sculpture and spotted Kunsel from across the room. "Hey, look it's Kunsel," Zack said as he started walking toward his SOLDIER friend. "C'mon, let's go say hi."_

_Zack led the way, expecting his date to follow him, but instead Cloud pulled back on Zack's arm causing him to stop. In a voice fraught with worry, he whispered in Zack's ear, "Wait, he's not going to recognize me is he?"_

"_What? No way," Zack announced in a voice much louder than a whisper. "I did a totally awesome job dressing you up. Alright, now come on." Zack grabbed Cloud's hand and started dragging him across the floor._

"_Could you say that a little louder?" Cloud grumbled, "I don't think the whole ballroom heard you."_

"_Sounds like you've got a stick up your ass," Zack teased._

"_Yeah, you would know," Cloud said discreetly, barely moving his lips while keeping his vision straight ahead. _

_As Zack and Cloud approached, Kunsel said in a vulgar tone, "Well, well, well, if it isn't Zack Charming and his Lovely Princess." Then Kunsel braced himself for one of Zack's man-hugs. _

_Zack nearly jumped on Kunsel as he hugged him, patting him on the back a few times before parting. Looking around, he asked, "Hey, where's your girlfriend, Chelsea?" _

"_Oh, she's just in the bathroom. You know how girls are," he said with a sigh. Zack rolled his eyes in acknowledgement. "Speaking of girlfriends, where's Aerith?"_

_Zack looked down at the ground and nervously rubbed the back of his neck. "Oh, uh. . . she was really sick so she couldn't make it." Turning to Cloud, Zack said, "She let me bring one of her friends." Zack blurted out the first name that came to his mind, "His name is . . . Skye." Cloud flinched and Zack realized his mistake, so he tried to redo the introduction. "Her," Zack said definitively, "Her name is Skye."_

_Cloud felt like smacking his palm onto his forehead, but instead he looked at the ground to hide his expression of annoyance. He just hoped Kunsel was as dense as Zack._

"_Huh," Kunsel said speculatively, taking a step back and crossing his arms over his chest. "That's quite an unusual name. She isn't related to your friend Cloud is she?"_

"_Uh, n-n-no!" Zack stammered, "Why would you think that?" _

_Taking a step towards Cloud, Kunsel peered into his eyes. "There's something about those eyes that just looks so familiar." Cloud focused on Kunsel's forehead so that his eyes wouldn't betray his identity. _

_Kunsel noticed an errant blonde spike, a different shade from the wig, sticking out. Why did that blonde spike look so familiar? Leaning close to the blonde, he whispered, "Is that really you Cloud?"_

_Cloud slumped forward and hung his head in shame. Zack pat him on the back, mockingly empathetic, saying, "Being my date isn't the worst thing in the world."_

"_Yes it is," Cloud grumbled as he pulled himself back up. Then he tucked the blonde spike under the wig._

"_Dude, that's awesome!" Kunsel said, trying to keep his voice down but doing a poor job of it. "You really look like a girl. Hey, if that SOLDIER thing doesn't work out, you could probably get a job at a bar dancing as a cross-dresser." Kunsel burst into laughter as he finished the statement, and Zack joined in._

"_Thanks," Cloud said, his voice flat and annoyed, "I'll remember that."_

_After calming down enough to form a coherent sentence, Kunsel asked, "Hey, are those boobs real?"_

_Cloud threw him a dirty look. "What do you think?"_

"_Awesome," Kunsel said with a big grin on his face. Completely mesmerized, he reached a hand out toward Cloud's breasts as he asked, "Can I touch them?" _

_Zack sharply slapped his hand away, "Paws off my girl." With a smug smile smeared on his face he said, "Touching her boobs is my job."_

_Kunsel gave Zack a high five and said in a chauvinistic voice, "Score! You the man Zack!"_

_Cloud turned his back on the whole thing, acting much like a mad girlfriend whose boyfriend had just offended her. Defending himself would only add fuel to the fire, and Zack was blazing brightly at the moment. He decided that he wasn't going to give in because it was time for Zack to apologize. His pride may have been buried beneath nylon stockings and a padded bra, but it was still there._

_After a few minutes of conversation, Cloud overheard Kunsel say, "I better let you get back to your girlfriend. Dude, she looks pissed." This statement was followed by a great deal of snickering._

_Zack came up behind Cloud, gently put his hand on his shoulder and tried to spin him around, but Cloud refused to move. "Hey, c'mon you know I was only teasing," Zack pleaded. "I didn't mean it."_

"_. . ."_

_Lowering his voice, Zack gingerly pulled on Cloud's arm and started to whisper something in his ear. "People are starting to watch because we're making a scene. Like I said, I'm really sorry. How about I go get us some drinks and give you some more time to cool down." _

_Cloud's scowl only deepened because this whole thing wasn't his fault. In fact, Cloud knew stuff like this was going to happen, but Zack convinced him to come to the ball despite it all. Trying his best to salvage appearances, Zack gave Cloud a few friendly pats on the forearm before leaving him at the side of the ballroom._

_While Cloud was waiting for Zack to return, he started to feel slightly uncomfortable, being alone in a room full of strangers made him feel oddly vulnerable. Now he wished that Zack hadn't left. He thought about chasing after him, but he couldn't find him in the midst of the crowd because black hair and glowing eyes were no longer an anomaly in a room full of SOLDIERs. With the low lighting, the room almost looked like a field of fireflies, glowing in different shades of blue, green, and brown. At least he was finding things to amuse himself while he stood around, feeling like an idiot, waiting for his date to return. _

_Little did Cloud know that from a distant corner of the room someone was watching him. That someone was Sephiroth. He latched onto Cloud's vulnerability like a hawk to a mouse and dug his claws in deep. He found it amusing how the blonde shifted and fidgeted, clearly as uncomfortable as he was at the party. That was supposed to be the end of the matter, but he found himself unable to turn away. Her blue eyes burned with a fiery intensity, the mark of a fighter, and he was drawn to her like a moth to a flame. Sephiroth liked his lovers feisty, he always liked a challenge. For all his grace and poise, he was aloof when it came to social matters, so he kept his distance for the time being, it was best not to get burned. Every now and then there were exceptions, and there was something_ exceptional _about that blonde in the deep midnight blue dress._

_As he gazed into her eyes, he felt himself get lost in those deep pools of blue, and before he knew it he was drowning in her essence. This really wasn't like him, so unrestrained and lacking in control. He tried to fight his emotions, to keep from feeling, but the more he struggled the deeper he sank. This was more than simple attraction. He wanted her, no needed her to be his. He would make her submit to him as his humble servant when he ruled supreme, and in return he'd bring her the salvation she desired, but not without making her beg for it first. _

_Startling him out of his thoughts, his secretary rushed in and discreetly whispered, "Sir, I'm sorry to bother you, but another Genesis sighting has registered on the computer. You told me to come get you if that happened."_

_Distancing himself from his emotions, he replied in a composed voice, "Yes, yes, of course. I'll be there as soon as possible."_

_As he walked toward the ballroom exit, he looked over his shoulder and caught her gaze. Her eyes opened wide with surprise and something akin to fear. From across the room he could almost hear her take in a sharp gasp. Someday she would be his. Only next time, she would bow down before him, on her knees, as his slave. This brought a subtle smirk of satisfaction to his face, and then he left the ballroom to attend to business. _

~*~*~*~*~

_With a champagne glass in each hand, Zack headed back over to Cloud only to find that something was completely amiss. The blonde looked painfully afraid, like he'd seen a ghost. "Hey, you okay?" Zack asked. Cloud was still unresponsive, so he gave him a gentle nudge to bring him back to reality. _

"_Huh?" Cloud was relieved to see friendly blue eyes instead of the cold green ones he expected. "No I'm fine, it's just. . . "_

"_What is it?" Zack rushed in, worried, "did some guy harass you while I was gone? I'll go talk to him, where is he?!" _

_Cloud just looked down at the floor and shook his head. "No, that's not it. It's stupid. . ." His voice trailed off in a melancholy fashion, a silent plea for further inquiry._

"_Well, what is it then?"_

"_Like I said, it's stupid."_

_Realizing this was going to be a lengthy conversation, Zack put the two glasses of champagne down on a nearby table. "Why don't you save us both some time and just tell me instead of making me drag it out of you."_

_With a sigh Cloud started, "You promise not to laugh?"_

"_Promise," Zack agreed, crossing his fingers in a visible location. His friend threw him a dirty look._

"_What?" Zack asked shrugging his shoulders. "What if it's really funny?"_

"_Nevermind," Cloud groaned and turned his back on Zack._

_Spinning his friend around, Zack apologized, "Sorry. I won't laugh."_

_Cloud eyed his friend suspiciously before deciding to trust him. With a sigh he said, "Sephiroth looked at me."_

"_. . . and?" _

"_That's it." _

"_That's what you were so afraid of telling me?"_

_Cloud expected a stronger reaction from Zack or at the very least a reflective pause. Even laughter would have been better than the casual tone Zack responded with. Trying to add more emphasis to the gravity of the situation, he lowered his voice. "Well, that's not it. He didn't just look at me. He _stared _at me like he was undressing me with his eyes." His eyebrows furrowed as he relived the memory. "Then he smirked, like we shared an inside joke or something. It was really creepy."_

_Zack chuckled, "Come on, you're messing with me." He half-expected Cloud to join in on the laughter, or crack a smile, but he didn't. There was nothing funny here. _

"_Zack, I'm not joking."_

_Trying to lighten up the situation, Zack said, "You were probably just seeing things. Maybe you're hungry." Grabbing Cloud's wrist, he started to pull him in the direction of the appetizers. _

_Cloud yanked his hand out of Zack's grip. "I'm not a kid Zack, and I know what I saw."_

"_Look, I'm not saying I don't believe you, but it could have been many things. You always assume the worst, am I right?"_

"_Maybe."_

"_See. Now, why don't we go get something to eat. I'm sure it will make you feel better." Seeing that his friend was still reluctant to move, he tried a more enticing strategy. "Hey, I heard they have those cloudberry tarts you like so much."_

_Cloud's ice-cold face cracked and melted into a smile. Cloudberries were indigenous to cold climates like Nibelheim because they needed cool summers to grow, which is why he hadn't had any since he left home. He loved cloudberry tarts, which were warm flaky pastry shells with a luscious filling that was both tangy and sweet. It made his mouth water just thinking about them. He eventually conceded, "Alright, but only because of the tarts."_

_The food only reminded him of how hungry he was. He'd been so nervous about the whole affair that he'd forgotten to eat earlier in the day. It took all of his self control not to scarf down the whole platter of tarts. Zack had to remind him more than once that his voracious appetite was unbecoming of a lady, to which Cloud responded, "Bite me."_

_Dinner was right around the corner, but it couldn't come soon enough for Cloud. The less time he spent mingling with Zack's friends and acquaintances, the better. Being introduced as Zack's date was bad enough without the snide glares he received from most of the girls in the room. He'd always assumed being a girl would be easier, but now he wasn't so sure. His thoughts drifted to Tifa. She must have it hard, he mused, being the perfect package of brains and beauty. He'd get into SOLDIER so that he could come back to protect her. He'd be her hero, and the next time she called he'd be there. It was a promise they'd made by the well years ago on a starry night._

_Zack jostled his friend out of his musings. "Hey, wake up there buddy, it's time for dinner."_

"_Huh?"_

"_Dinner, you know. Food. I thought you were hungry." Just then he took notice of the dazed look on Cloud's face. "Hey, you okay buddy?"_

_Shaking himself out of it, he responded in a certain voice, "Yeah, I'm fine. Let's go eat."_

~*~*~*~*~

Zack's stomach growled, interrupting the story. "Speaking of food, I'm kind of hungry. Why don't we take a break and go get something to eat."

"I'm not hungry," Lilleas replied.

"Well, I didn't ask if you were. Notice I said I'm hungry." After propping Cloud up with some pillows, he went over to the table with the food.

Trying to sound authoritative, she said, "Okay, but don't think you're getting out of telling the rest of the story. I have to hear about dinner."

Zack brushed her off as he went over to the table with food to fix up a couple of sandwiches. "Hey Lilleas, do you want one?"

"Ummm, okay. How about Cloud?"

Pausing, he looked over his shoulder, "Why, did Cloud say he was hungry?"

She looked over at Cloud who was slumped over and silent. Then she turned to Zack and shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know."

Calling out to his friend, Zack asked, "Yo Spike, food?"

With an imperceptible lift of the head, Cloud replied, "Nnnngggggh."

Lilleas watched Zack's face for a reaction, but he'd already resumed sandwich-making. "What'd he say?"

"He just said he wasn't hungry." In the same nonchalant tone he carried on, "Oh, and he also said 'tell Lilleas to stop being annoying.'"

"What?!" Lilleas asked, insulted. "He did not say that." Zack broke into a big grin, so Lilleas picked up a pillow and chucked it at him.

Zack dodged it with ease. "You throw like a _girl_."

Before realizing what he said, she automatically replied, incensed, "I do not." Zack broke into a chuckle. "Oh. . ." she paused and thought about it for a moment. "Well what's wrong with throwing like a girl?"

"Nothing," Zack replied, trying to appear earnest, "you seem to be the one upset about it." He sat down and started to eat his peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

"Cloud, I don't know how you've put up with him for so long."

Zack chuckled while taking a bite of his sandwich, which turned into a series of coughs. Lilleas paused, staring intently at Zack, unsure of what to do next. Finally the coughs slowed down, and Zack was finally able to take a sip of water from a nearby glass.

"Hey you okay?"

His answer came out in short cough-like spurts, "Yeah. . . I'm fine." Curling his hand into a fist, he brought it down hard against his breastbone. "It just went down the wrong pipe."

Lilleas threw him a 'be-careful-look,' while Zack resumed eating the rest of his sandwich. While Zack went on to make another, Lilleas became entranced by something she saw outside. Through gauze colored curtains, she saw dancing shadows, dark figures from her past. She rose from her place on the bed, and went over to the window. Slowly, she peeled back the curtains, and looked under the blinds to find only trees swaying in the wind. Her heart stilled.

"Hey, you alright over there?" Zack asked, worried.

Still distracted, Lilleas replied, "Yeah, I just thought I saw something."

Zack waited for some elaboration, but there was none, only silence. Lilleas returned to the bed beside Cloud, and Zack finished devouring his sandwich. The incident went without further mention.

After giving the food a few minutes to settle, Zack said, "Alright, now it's time for a little exercise."

"Wait, I thought you were just going to get something to eat."

"Change of plans," Zack announced over Lilleas' huff of impatience.

Zack walked over to the front entryway and did a few warm-up squats before he went over to the bed and roused Cloud. Grabbing him up, Zack positioned him on his feet, and wrapped one of Cloud's arms around his shoulder. "C'mon Spike. We've got to keep in shape."

Cloud moaned in protest, like Zack was going to change his wound dressing instead.

"That's right buddy, no pain no gain." Zack pulled out the pocket-watch and checked the time. He muttered to himself, "Okay, so we'll do about an hour of this today."

Sensing that it was going to be a while before story-time resumed, Lilleas went over to her bed and turned on the TV. Zack and Cloud began their exercise regimen. They started off with a few laps around the room, taking it slow at first. Then Zack added in the bed as an obstacle, and they had to climb over it like a stair-step every few laps. Cloud became much more vocal about his distress when the bed was added into their regimen.

At first she tried to ignore it, but after a while she couldn't hear the TV above Cloud's loud vocalizations. Putting the TV on mute, Lilleas asked, "Do you really have to climb over the bed? Cloud seems most unhappy about it."

Without taking a pause in their exercise routine, Zack said, "Of course he doesn't like it. But if he we did everything that Cloud wanted, we wouldn't even be here. He has to keep his strength up and if he doesn't like it, tough titties."

"Well hang in there Cloud," Lilleas said encouragingly.

They continued their exercise regimen alternating walking laps with bed-climbing laps until a full hour had passed. Afterwards, Zack dropped Cloud off on the bed. "Hey Lilleas, could you. . . "

She sat up at attention, "Take care of Cloud?"

"Yeah," Zack chuckled. "Guess I didn't have to ask twice. Listen, I'm going to go take a shower." He was about to continue, but Lilleas had already stopped listening, so he saved his effort and went straight to the bathroom instead.

When Zack emerged from the bathroom, he found Cloud tucked into bed and covered with a thin sheet. As Zack approached, Lilleas said, "I gave him a glass of water. He was tired so I put him to sleep."

"Heh, guess that exercise wore him out." Getting into the bed beside Cloud, Zack said, "Well, it's best he's asleep for this next part. I don't think he'd forgive me for sharing."

Lilleas' eyes twinkled with interest, "Really, even worse than that thing with Kunsel and Sephiroth?"

With a big grin on his face, Zack said, "Oh yeah, much worse."

~*~*~*~*~

_As they approached the table, Cloud stood right behind Zack. Since the table was mostly vacant, they had their choice of seats, so Zack picked out the two closest to them. Before Cloud could pull out the chair from the table, Zack beat him to it. "Here ya go," he said with an inviting arm gesture. _

_This was the first time tonight that Zack had shown him some respect. Ironically, it made him feel even more uncomfortable, if that was even possible. "Uh, thanks."_

"_Sure, no problem." Zack flashed him a friendly smile as he sat down. "Hey, there's a basket of bread, you want some?" _

"_Yeah." _

_As Zack was reaching for the bread, Cloud heard footsteps approach the table and stop right beside him. Then a smooth baritone voice asked, "Pardon me miss, is this seat taken?"_

_Cloud looked up into soft blue eyes, and a million dollar smile, full of bright white teeth. It was Rufus Shinra, the president's son, heir apparent to the world's fortune. He could hardly believe it. He'd never actually seen him in person before. Not that he really cared to, but he found himself in awe, like it was Sephiroth standing beside him instead. Frozen and unable to move, the most he could do was take a big gulp of stale air._

"_I guess I'll take that as a no," Rufus said, taking the seat beside Cloud. "So Zack, who is this charming lady you've brought with you tonight."_

"_Oh her?" Zack asked in surprise, nearly choking on a piece of bread. He didn't anticipate Rufus taking a liking to Cloud. "She's just a friend of my girlfriend, Aerith."_

_Rufus gave a wolfish smile. "Friend you say?" Then he turned to Cloud. "Well it's a pleasure to meet you," he said in a smooth gravelly voice, the type that made women swoon. Cloud had never heard anything quite like it. A voice so seductive and soothing he could almost feel himself melting in his seat. "I assume you already know who I am, so why don't I skip the introduction. Please, tell me about yourself."_

_Cloud may have looked like a girl, but there was nothing that could be done about his masculine voice. He needed some help out of this one. Since it was Zack that got him into this mess, it was Zack that should get him out of it. But at the moment, Zack was completely engrossed in the bread before him, so Cloud elbowed him sharply to get his attention._

_Zack turned around and was greeted by a panicked Cloud, who silently mouthed the words, "I can't talk."_

"_Oh, I got ya." Leaning forward so that he could see Rufus, Zack said, "You'll have to excuse my friend, she had a bout of laryngitis so she can't really talk at the moment."_

_It was as good of an excuse as any, so Cloud played along and gave a shy nod. _

_Rufus leaned in towards Cloud and lowered his voice in a seductive fashion, "Don't worry, words aren't needed to express one's feelings."_

_Cloud could feel his face getting warm, and his cheeks turned the color of ripe tomatoes. Suddenly, locking himself in the bathroom for the rest of the night didn't seem so bad, but he didn't want to bail on Zack_. Stupid conscience,_ he thought to himself._

"_Since you're currently at a loss for words, why don't I tell you a little about myself," Rufus said with a charming smile. Before Cloud even had a chance to respond, Rufus started discussing firearms and how he'd recently perfected his one-handed firing technique with a sawed-off shotgun, something even Cloud had to admit was quite a feat of achievement. _

_Firearms eventually led to talk of business, but then again, almost everything circled back to business. It had been the sole focus of his twenty years of existence. From the cradle to present, his father had been grooming him for the family business. ShinRa: it was a name that meant something, which is why he used it to flirt with women. It worked 99.9% of the time, with Cloud being the one exception. Cloud wasn't like most girls, even without the bulge under his pantyhose. _

_Rufus bragged about his newly acquired stocks and investments before droning on and on about how Mako-powered vehicles were the way of the future. Cloud could feel himself losing interest, and he struggled to keep from nodding off. After a while, Rufus noticed this and decided to liven up the conversation with some tales of his breathtaking adventures around the world._

"_So, have you ever been to the Northern Continent to see the Aurora Borealis?"_

_Cloud perked up a bit, but tried to refrain from looking too interested lest he give off mixed signals. If nothing else, it was a more interesting topic. Growing up he'd seen pictures of it in books, rainbow colored lights dancing in the sky against a stunning white background. Nibelheim had snow, but that was about it. Someday he wanted to take Tifa up there to see it, but she'd never go with a loser like him. He needed to get into SOLDIER first. Then she'd want to spend time with him. Unfortunately, it was Rufus who wanted to spend time with him at the moment. _

"_When you get the chance, you should go see it sometime, or better yet. . . "_

_Rufus was interrupted by a booming voice that carried a hint of warmth and familiarity. "Rufus, it's good to see you again." It was Mark, the CEO of a small power company that was contemplating a merger with ShinRa. There were small pockets of the world that ShinRa didn't own, at least not yet_

_Rufus turned and greeted Mark with a firm confident handshake before inviting the man to sit down beside him. While Mark was getting settled, Rufus turned to Cloud and said, "I'll just be a minute." Business_ always _came first._

_Taking advantage of the opportunity, Cloud moved his chair as close to Zack as possible, all the while trying to be discreet. _

"_Whoa, you're getting friendly," Zack said with a light chuckle. _

_Cloud just sighed and leaned into Zack. "Don't worry, you'll feel better after dinner," the SOLDIER reassured his friend. Then he proceeded to introduce him to several people at the table. _

_While he'd been occupied with Rufus, the table had filled up with well-to-do businessmen and top Shinra executives. Zack kept the conversation flowing freely on his side of the table, while Cloud listened about half of the time. The other half of the time he stared at his plate and listened to the rumble of his stomach. _

_At last dinner came and for Cloud it was the event of the evening. Being at the head-table had its advantages because they were served first. The mouthwatering aroma of seared meat wafted through the air making Cloud almost forget about the Rufus situation, almost. _

_Zack hadn't told him what they were being served for dinner, but it sure smelled good. The servers started with President Shinra and went around the table serving dinner in a clockwise fashion. Finally the plate was in front of him. The entrée was a tender filet of Wutain corn-fed beef along with a roasted free-range chicken breast stuffed with garlic herb cheese and served with lemon butter. Garnishing the entrée were sides of garlic mashed potatoes and tender asparagus spears. _

_Cloud had no trouble picking out what he wanted to eat first and started with the steak. On the first bite, he savored the warm flavor of the meat and let it melt in his mouth. Then his stomach got greedy, and he started devouring the steak as fast as he could swallow. _

"_Whoa, slow down there Skye," Zack said humorously. Then under his breath he muttered harshly, "You're eating like a Shinra grunt that hasn't seen decent food in weeks."_

_Cloud stopped mid-bite and looked up from his plate only to be met by a few curious glances. Zack had a point, so he tried to slow down. _

_He finished his steak and was about to start in on the chicken breast when he felt something funny on his right foot. It felt kind of hard and nondescript, like a foot. Was someone playing footsie with him? _

_His first inclination was to stomp hard on the assaulting foot because he had enough of Zack's shenanigans for the night. Then he realized Zack was on his left and it was his right foot that was being played with, which meant. . . He looked over at Rufus who was wearing a sly grin. Suddenly, he lost his appetite._

_He tried to pretend that everything was okay, but he was focused so hard on not thinking about it that it made him think even harder about it. It was a vicious cycle of thought, and it had to be stopped. Leaning over, he cupped a hand around Zack's ear and whispered, "Meet me under the table."_

_Before Zack even had a chance to ask his friend what he was talking about, Cloud had already slipped under the table. _

"_Uh, excuse me folks, my friend lost her earring and I'm going to try to help her find it," Zack explained. He ducked under the table to find Cloud crouched down on his knees. "Hey buddy, what's the problem? Is there any reason we're under a table?"_

_With great hesitation he said, "Well. . . you're not going to believe me."_

"_If you don't want to tell me then why did you call me here?" he asked with annoyance._

_Cloud let out a tired sigh and was about to explain the situation when another voice spoke behind him. "Did anyone lose an earring?" Cloud recognized that voice, it was Rufus. "Zack, your dinner is probably getting cold, why don't you let me handle the situation." _

_Zack shifted his gaze from Rufus to Cloud a couple of times before noticing that his friend's eyes were as wide as saucers. Something wasn't right. He hadn't been paying much attention earlier, but it didn't take a genius to figure it out, Rufus was hitting on Cloud. "Uh, no that's okay. I know what the earring looks like so I think I'll be of better help. It won't take long."_

_Rufus' face remained expressionless, but his voice had a cold, sharp edge to it. "Lieutenant Fair, I insist you eat your dinner if you know what's best for you."_

_Rufus always got what he wanted and he'd make trouble if he didn't, so Zack clenched his fist and acquiesced to his request. "Listen Skye, Rufus is going to help you find your earring but I'll just be right above the table if you need me."_

_As Zack went back to his seat, Rufus crawled over to Cloud. Now in close proximity, Cloud could see the freckles on the bridge of Rufus' nose. _

"_Looks like someone wants to play a game of hide and seek," Rufus said. "Peek-a-boo, I found you." _

_Like a scared animal trapped in a cage, Cloud backed away from Rufus, which was futile because there wasn't much room under the table to move. "Don't be scared," he cooed. Reaching out a hand he caressed Cloud's cheek. "I don't bite," he paused for emphasis, "hard."_

_A wave of panic rushed over Cloud, and he shot straight up into the table. It felt like someone bashed his head with a hammer, but that didn't matter now because he had to get away. Using the distraction to his advantage, he crawled away from Rufus and back to his seat where he was met by a table full of curious glances. Rufus followed shortly after. Unsure of the proper reaction, everyone looked at Rufus, waiting for him to make the first move._

"_It's okay everyone, she was just excited that she found her earring," Rufus explained. He cracked a smile, and the table erupted into nervous laughter. _

_Eventually people resumed eating and the incident was quickly forgotten by everyone except for Cloud. He had a quarter-sized bump on the top of his head, and at the moment he had a horrible headache. His appetite left along with his dignity, so he resorted to pushing the food around on his plate for the rest of dinner. Zack gave him an empathetic look before asking if he could finish it off. _

_Cloud and Zack were the first ones to leave the table after dinner, which Zack blamed on the fact that his date didn't feel well. They stepped off to the side, out of reach of prying ears. Cloud asked, "Can we go home now? I'm feeling really tired."_

_With open arms, Zack said, "Come here let me give you a hug."_

_Cloud took a weak step forward into Zack's arms and relaxed, letting his friend support the bulk of his weight for the moment. _

"_Do ya feel better?"_

_Cloud just weakly nodded._

"_Good, cause there's one more thing we have to do tonight before we go." Before Cloud could get away, Zack had a strong grip on his wrist and started pulling him towards the dance floor. Unlike last time though, Cloud didn't have the energy to fight, so he just meekly followed._

"_Zack, I just want to go home," Cloud complained._

"_Come on, just one dance, please?"_

_Looking over his shoulder, Cloud saw that Rufus was still eating. The coast was clear; he would be safe for now. "Alright," he groaned, "just one dance and then we go home."_

_Stepping onto the dance floor, Zack showed Cloud how to stand. "You put your hand on my shoulder, and put your hand out like this and now we're ready."_

_Furrowing his eyebrows, Cloud asked, "How do we move?"_

"_That's the easy part. You just follow my feet."_

_Zack started moving and Cloud looked down at his feet, which prompted Zack to say, "Don't look down, keep your head up."_

"_What if you step on my feet?"_

"_What if you step on my feet?"_

"_Then it's funny," Cloud smirked._

_Zack just shook his head in dismissal of the comment and kept his feet moving. Soon enough, they were moving across the floor in a semi-clunky fashion._

"_That's it, you're doing good," Zack said encouragingly. _

_It did little to change the frown on Cloud's face. "Just admit it, we suck." _

_Zack chuckled, "No, you suck. I'm actually pretty good at dancing, but I'm doing the best with what I have here."_

_Cloud let out a groan, "Thanks for the encouragement."_

"_Hey, no problem. That's what friends are for."_

_Eventually, they found a certain rhythm to the waltz music, and their movements started to take the shape of dancing. "One, two, three, one two, three," Zack said softly in time to the music. _

_Suddenly, Cloud's face paled. "What is it Spike?" Zack asked, temporarily forgetting his friend's disguise. _

_Unblinking, Cloud stared straight ahead, like his face was paralyzed. Turning around, Zack saw Rufus standing right behind him, waiting with a smile. _

"_May I have this dance," Rufus asked Zack, nodding towards Cloud. _

_Zack hated to sacrifice his innocent friend to Rufus, but it was only for a dance. Besides, he'd be close by so nothing bad could really happen. Cloud would forgive him eventually, just like he always did. "Okay, but only one dance. My friend isn't feeling well after dinner. I think her steak didn't set well." _

"_But of course, I'll return her back in perfect condition."_

_Cloud thought up a few swear words and mentally sent them in Zack's direction, which was all he could manage at the moment. _

_Rufus bowed before the beautiful blonde lady in front of him, and Cloud in turn just stared at him in bewilderment. "My fine lady, shall we dance." _

_Before Cloud could even refuse, Rufus snaked an arm around his waist and tried to pull Cloud flush against him, so that they were like two lovers in the 'heat of the moment.'_

_Doing his best not to draw attention, Cloud tried to resist Rufus' attempt to pull him close, but Rufus was determined. Cloud lost the struggle and crashed into Rufus with a loud pop._

"_Oooo," he said with a sultry laugh, "is that the sound of your heart beating for me?"_

_Cloud just nodded nervously. It was better than trying to explain that one of the pudding bags stuffed in his bra had a leak. The wet pudding against his skin made him shudder, it felt gross and uncomfortable. At least Zack had gotten him an underwire bra so the pudding didn't dribble down his dress. It was fairly contained within the bra cup, at least for now._

_They were close enough now that Cloud had to either stare Rufus in the face or rest his head on Rufus' shoulder, so he chose the latter. As Rufus started moving, Cloud closed his eyes and tried to imagine that he was dancing with Tifa instead. He assumed the role of a handsome SOLDIER and she was his beautiful date. They were here together at the annual ShinRa Ball and gliding across the dance floor in graceful movements. There was magic in the air, they both could feel it. Since this was his fantasy, he was definitely getting 'lucky' tonight, and Tifa would like it, _a lot_. The illusion worked at first, until he felt Rufus' hard erection pressing into his lower abdomen. He struggled to calm his gag reflex._

_Then Cloud tried to focus on something else. Maybe Zack could get him out of this mess? Unfortunately, his SOLDIER friend had lost focus and was on the sidelines absent-mindedly watching the other couples. Trying to get Zack's attention, he carefully enunciated each silently-mouthed word. "Hey, the pudding bag popped."_

_He had to repeat it a few times before Zack noticed. However, his friend wasn't fluent in reading lips so he had no idea what Cloud was saying. He gave him a thumbs-up sign. Those never hurt, right?_

Unbelievable,_ Cloud thought to himself._

_A hand came up and started stroking his hair. "Mmmmm, your hair is so silky." Then Rufus leaned forward, "and smells like. . . like plastic?"_

_Even Cloud had to smile at that comment. _

"_Ah, so it's humor you like, I wish I would have known earlier as I am quite the comedian when I want to be."_

_Rufus tried to get another smile out of Cloud, but he was unsuccessful. As soon as the music ended, Rufus loosened his grip, and Cloud broke free of his embrace. He nearly ran to the bathroom to take care of his misshapen breast._

_Zack noticed a blonde and blue blur moving quickly towards the bathroom. He realized it was Cloud, so he rushed in to cover for his friend. "Sorry sir, you'll have to excuse her. She wasn't feeling well."_

_Rufus held up his hand as if halting the apology, "No apology needed. Perhaps she'd feel better on another date." Reaching into his pocket, he took out a business card from his infinite supply. "Give this to her for me." The he kissed the back of the card, "Courtesy of Rufus Shinra."_

"_Uh, yes sir," he said, taking a lingering look at the card before putting it into his pocket. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go check on my date."_

_Rufus gave a nod to excuse the SOLDIER, and Zack took off towards the ladies restroom to wait outside for his date. Cloud emerged about ten minutes later, with a slightly misshapen chest and a crestfallen expression. There were a whole slew of profanities he wanted to say, but he was tired and at the moment and it seemed like too much work. In fact, he didn't even want to talk, so they walked back to Zack's apartment in silence. Zack tried to drape his arm around his friend's shoulder as a demonstration of amity, but Cloud shrugged him off. It would be a long time before Cloud could tolerate the friendly touch of another man. _

_As soon as they made it inside Zack's apartment, Cloud threw off his shoes and ran to the bathroom. He'd never been so happy to get naked in his life. _

"_Hey Spike, aren't you forgetting something?"_

_Peeking his head out of the bathroom, he stared blankly at Zack._

"_Here, let me get you a clean towel and some clean clothes."_

"_Thanks."_

_When Zack came back the bathroom door was closed and the shower was running, so he knocked on the door. He spoke loudly so that Cloud could hear him over the running water. "Hey, I set the stuff outside for you."_

_Then he went over to the fridge, grabbed a beer for himself and Cloud, and flopped on the couch. Actually, the night turned out better than he expected. Of course, he would have preferred to take Aerith, but Cloud was an okay guy. Perhaps the only friend he had that would play dress-up for him, which said something about Cloud's character and their unique friendship. _

_Putting his feet up leisurely on the coffee table, he rested his head on the back of the couch and started to doze off. The sound of rustling clothes woke him up about a half hour later. _

"_Hey Spike where ya going?" he asked groggily, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes._

_Cloud looked embarrassed, ashamed even, like he'd be caught in the middle of some scandalous activity. "Oh. . . I didn't mean to wake you. I was just leaving."_

"_Leaving?" Zack asked with a mix of humor and incredulity. "Nah, why don't you spend the night. It's pretty late and you must be tired. I'll even let you have the bed."_

_Cloud paused, contemplating, "Where are you going to sleep then?"_

"_In the bed with you."_

_There was silence, except for the loud thud as Cloud's bag hit the floor. "I. . .I should be going."_

"_Hey, I'm just messing with ya. I'll take the couch." Zack hit his knee and started laughing, "Oh man, you should have seen your face." Zack did a mock imitation of Cloud's startled face, which even had Cloud laughing a bit. Patting the cushion next to him, he said, "Come on, I saved you a seat." _

_Zack stretched out, propping his feet up on the coffee table, while Cloud joined him on the couch. "Hey, I got you a beer."_

_There were two empty beer bottles on the coffee table. "That was so nice of you," Cloud said sarcastically._

_It took Zack a second or two to realize the problem. "Oh, I'm sorry. Guess I got a bit carried away. I'll go get you another one."_

"_No, I'm okay," Cloud said casually._

"_You sure? Cause you look like you could use one." _

"_No, really I'm okay," he said with a bit more annoyance. Not only was he under the legal drinking age, he didn't feel like having one at the moment._

"_Don't worry, I'm not going to tell on you. I got your back."_

_Seeing that Zack would leave him alone until he had one, he finally agreed. "Okay, I guess it's alright."_

_Ruffling his friend's wet hair, Zack said, "That's the spirit Spike." He went to the kitchen and came back with a beer. Sitting back down on the couch, he said, "So, that was some party wasn't it."_

_Cloud released a large sigh, a culmination of the night's stress. _

"_That bad, huh?"_

"_Zack, my pudding boob popped."_

_This sent Zack into snickering laughter. "Oh, by the way, Rufus told me to give you this." Zack produced a business card from his pocket and handed it to his friend._

_Taking the card, Cloud ripped it up and shook his head in dismay. "I'd have to be brainwashed or crazy to wear a dress again."_

"_. . . or both," Zack chimed in. A dark silence settled between them, bringing a sense of foreboding. Zack decided to lighten things up. "So what do you think I'd look like as a girl?"_

_Cloud replied almost instantaneously, "An ugly one." Taking a sip of beer, he waited for Zack's response._

"_Hey, you sound like you had that one prepared." Zack looked over at Cloud and saw him smile, which sent him back into laughter. "Yeah," he paused to catch his breath. "I guess I'm a bit manly looking," he said humorously flexing his biceps._

"_You don't have to impress me, I'm not a girl," Cloud replied in annoyance._

"_What you mean like this?" While sitting down, he straightened out his back and flexed his biceps like a body-builder. He added in a growl for effect._

_Cloud was speechless for a moment. When his voice came back it was soft and quiet. "I want to be like that someday. . . "_

_Zack relaxed his arms and went back to his reclining position on the couch. "Don't worry Spike, you'll get there someday."_

"_Yeah. . . "_

_Giving him a friendly punch to the arm, Zack said reassuringly, "Hey kid, you got me on your side. How could you not get into SOLDIER. I tell ya what, if you don't get into SOLDIER I'll dress up like a girl for you." _

"_You're just saying that."_

"_No, I'm serious. I, Zack Fair SOLDIER 1__ST__ Class, will put on a dress."_

_Cloud started to perk up. "And wear pudding boobs?"_

"_Yes, I'll even wear the pudding boobs. See, you win either way."_

_Finally, Cloud was starting to get his confidence back. "Yeah, but if I make it into SOLDIER I'm sure I'll be able to get a better date than you." _

_Pretending to be offended, Zack said, "Hey, I'll have you know I'm a damn good kisser."_

"_Says who, your grandma?" Cloud snickered._

"_Says my girlfriend and every other girl I've dated." _

_Looking into Zack's eyes, Cloud paused a moment before speaking. "Thanks Zack, for being a good friend."_

"_Don't get all mushy on me Spike."_

"_Jerk," Cloud scoffed. He was tired, so now seemed like a good time to head off to bed. _

"_Hey," Zack called after him. Cloud turned and paused, expectant. "You're a good friend too."_

_Cloud gave a small genuine smile, "Thanks."_

"_You should smile more, it looks good on you,"_

_Rolling his eyes in an exaggerated fashion, Cloud said, "Goodnight Zack."_

"_Night Spike." He started to talk, but his next few words were mumbled by a yawn, "See ya in the morning."_

~*~*~*~*~

Zack paused for a while, letting the story come to a natural close.

"So that's it?" Lilleas asked.

"What do you mean, 'that's it'?"

"Did you dress up like a girl or did Cloud make it into SOLDIER?"

Her question was totally unexpected, and it hurt, like a punch to the gut. "Oh, neither."

"What?! You mean to tell me that after all you put Cloud through as a girl, you wouldn't do the same for him?"

Clenching his fists, he said in an angrier tone than intended, "Sometimes things don't work out the way you plan."

The room grew suddenly silent, like someone had opened up the windows and sucked the sound out of the room. He didn't apologize, and she didn't ask. There was nothing more to be said. Getting up from the bed, Zack fished out some money from his pocket, counted it, and gave it to Lilleas. "Here, why don't you go pay for the room tonight."

Eager to get out of the tense situation, Lilleas took the money and left.

Outside, the shadows were taking their last run of the land, running back into the darkness from whence they came. To the east the sun bled into the clouds, while rays of copper colored light painted the sky. It made her stop for a moment before she made her way over to the cashier.

The large double windows of the cashier building gave off a dingy yellow light. As she came closer, something unusual caught her attention, two strangely dressed men wearing blue outfits with silver helmets. This sparked the motors of recognition. She muttered softly, "These must be the men Zack was referring to, the ones that are chasing them."

She found herself unable to move any closer to the building, like her feet were glued to the ground, and her heart fluttered with nervous anticipation. Then one of the strange men turned and caught her gaze, and her heart nearly flew out of her chest.

~*~*~*~*~

**Disclaimer:** All characters except for Lilleas belong to SquareEnix

**Author's Note: **

Yay! This story made it to 200 reviews! *Hands everyone cookies* In honor of my friend Cookiecat I'll make them chocolate chip cookies, her favorite ^_^ Thank you everyone for the reviews!**  
**

I wanted to thank **Blue Jae** for being my lovely beta reader for the flashback! Also, **Demonegg** and **Armae** helped with this chapter. Thank you so much!

Before I say anything else, Blue Jae drew a picture of Princess Cloud for me ^_^ She scanned it and put it on Deviant Art. I'll put the link in my profile and on LJ. Thank you! Cloud looks so pretty ;)

The cloudberry actually does exist. I was looking up Norwegian food, because Nibelheim kind of reminds me of Norway, and I came upon the cloudberry. I thought, I have to use that! So yeah, if you go to Scandinavian countries you can get cloudberries. I looked up the description on Wikipedia, when ripe they're golden in color, kind of like Cloud ;)

Also, Rufus' official weapon is a sawed-off shotgun that he shoots with one hand. I don't know what Square Enix was thinking. . .

I realize that this chapter took about two months from the last one. Well, life happens. I actually detailed some of it in my periodic updates because I felt bad that it was taking so long. I just had hip arthroscopy surgery, which is part of it. Anyway, I started a Live Journal account if anyone is curious. It just felt kind of weird to be telling my life story in the Author's Notes. Lol.

The next chapter should be relatively short so I think I'll just update this story again before I go back to the Aerith story. Also, I updated/revised Chapter 1. I think it sounds a lot better. I'm going to try to revise an old chapter with each new chapter I put out.


	20. Chapter 20

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 20**

_**Beta Reader: Blue Jae **_**and **_**Cookiecat**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

"_**What happened to dreams and honor?" ~ Zack Fair, FF 7: Crisis Core**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

The windows of the reception building were frosted over with a light film of condensation while the neon lights overhead flickered doubtfully, casting shadows on the men in the room. Somewhere a clock was ticking_._ The Shinra grunts had been waiting for a few minutes behind the counter for the receptionist, but he was still on the phone with an angry customer. Johnny started to tap his foot to the beat of the clock.

Ashwin's eyes wandered around the room, pausing on the window as he caught sight of something outside glimmering in the darkness, a pair of eyes accompanied by the slender figure of a young girl. Through the frosty window pane, she looked like a delicate piece of colored glass perched on a shelf in a display case. Her eyes were large, as if she was frightened, and he wanted to reach out to help her, a father's instinct perhaps. He could feel himself moving closer, only his feet were still on the ground and he hadn't moved an inch.

Eventually, Johnny noticed that his friend was staring out the window, engrossed in thought. "Hey, what ya looking at buddy?"

Aswhin shook himself free of the trance and turned to look at his friend. "It's just, there's this girl outside." They both looked over to the window only to be met by darkness. She was gone.

"You're just shittin' me," Johnny said, giving Ashwin a playful nudge.

"No, I'm serious. There was a girl out there." His voice took on a tone of uncertainty, and his eyes shifted to the ground, "At least…I thought there was."

"Don't worry about it, you're probably just hungry."

"Yeah, maybe that's it," Ashwin agreed, wanting to believe his friend. But he wasn't hungry, he wasn't hungry at all.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

As soon as she could pull herself away, Lilleas made her way towards their room. She wanted to run, gods did she want to run, but she couldn't afford any unnecessary attention. Zack and Cloud already had enough trouble of their own without having to worry about her.

When she got to the door she knocked twice, pounded the door once, paused exactly five seconds, and then gave three knocks in quick succession.

The door cracked open about the width of a hand, just enough space for her to squeeze through. Once inside, she checked to make sure that the door was closed and locked behind her. The words flew out of her mouth faster then she could speak, "The guards! I mean the people that are after you! They're out there!"

Zack stopped suddenly and turned to face her, "Wait, what did you say?"

"The bad guys, the ones you told me about, they're out there!"

Now he had a panicked look in his eyes, feral, like an animal cornered in a cage. "Who, you mean Shinra?"

She flinched at his accusatory tone, "Yeah."

"Out where?"

She started once again in a frenzied pace, "I was going to go pay for the room and I was just about at the cashier's building when I looked through the window and I saw these two scary guys in dark blue uniforms and I remember you telling me that ShinRa troopers wear blue uniforms and as I got closer I think one of them saw me and. . . "

He cut her off sharply before she could ramble on much longer. "Wait, slow down for a second. I'm having trouble understanding you."

Taking a deep breath she continued, as slow and steady as one could be under the given circumstances. "So I was on my way over to the reception area when I saw them through the window. I've never seen a real one in person, but from what you told me I'm sure they were ShinRa troopers. I think one of them saw me and. . . "

"Shit! This is bad." Suddenly, Zack found it hard to breathe, like someone had sucked all the air out of the room, and he started to feel faint and light-headed. He found a chair and stumbled over to it just as a barrage of tiny black dots attacked his vision.

He took several deep breaths before he was able to speak again. "Shit, they're in Fairton now. I bet one of those bastards in the grocery store tipped them off. It will only be a matter of time before they send out the whole army." While clutching fistfuls of hair, he hung his head between his hands as he contemplated their dark fate.

"What are we going to do?"

"I don't know Lilleas, just be quiet and let me think." He stared intently at the table in front of him as if it had a solution to their problem, faint lines etched in an even pattern, too perfect to be real. He looked up from the table, the answer wasn't there.

She stopped pacing and took a seat on the bed.

"Hold on, maybe this isn't as bad as I thought. We don't know that the clerk ratted us out, do we?" Zack asked, looking over at her hopefully.

She could feel his eyes on her, watching her closely. "Actually, I think the clerk was someone different, someone I haven't seen before."

"How sure are you?"

"About seventy percent," she said with wavering certainty, almost as if it were a question.

"Damn," Zack cursed, the words dying on his lips. He looked over at Cloud who was buried under layers of blankets and curled up in a fetal position with his head protectively nestled in his arms. Zack released a sigh. "I don't think he's well enough to endure a bunch of ShinRa bastards chasing after us. He might not make it."

Lilleas countered, "But if we stay here we're just like sitting ducks. They'll find us for sure!"

He pounded his fist on the table and Cloud stirred, turning on his back with a groan before curling back up. "Then that's just a chance we're going to have to take. Besides, they've probably got this village surrounded by now. If we leave now we may just be walking into a trap."

The thought of impending doom made Lilleas come undone. She tried to hold back, but the comforting warmth of the first few tears broke down her resistance, and she fell into wracking sobs.

Before, Zack was too preoccupied with their current situation to notice that Lilleas was ramping up into a fit of hysteria, but now she was too loud to ignore. He turned toward the wet noise and saw her hunched over, shaking, with her face buried in her hands. At the moment, she looked more like a child than the adult she pretended to be.

Crying females had always been a weakness of his, so he got up from his chair and sat down beside her. Placing a comforting hand on her back, he remained silent because he couldn't bring himself to say anything useful at the moment. Being the quiet person he was, Cloud had taught him that sometimes words weren't necessary. Sometimes just being there was enough.

Eventually she calmed down enough to form a coherent sentence. With damp eyes, she looked up at him hopefully. "Zack, I'm really scared."

Pulling her into a tight embrace, he said, "I know."

He held onto her while she coughed and hiccupped into silence, moistening the front of his shirt with sorrow.

"Zack, why are those guys after you? You didn't do something bad … did you?"

Zack smirked, "Not unless you consider thwarting the attempts of a mad scientist to be a crime."

She stared at him blankly, wiping the tears away from her red and puffy eyes.

Zack started again with a sigh, "Well, without going into details it's like this. Cloud and I used to be in ShinRa's army. Actually Cloud was a trooper, like those grunts you saw. I was in a different organization, but we were fighting on the same side."

He was about to continue, but she cut him off sharply, "Wait, that doesn't make any sense. Why would they be after you if you were one of them?"

With a dark laugh he continued, "You're right, none of it makes sense and if I were to tell you the whole story," he sighed and looked over at her. She stared back at him with those large green eyes of hers, innocent and trusting, but it wasn't enough. Clenching a fist, he turned away. "Some things are better left unsaid."

"No please tell me." She gently tugged on his arm and said, "I promise I won't tell anyone." Then she looked up at him and smiled: that same sweet innocent smile of another, Aerith. For a moment his heart stopped, and all logic and reason left, carried away by the memory of soft pink lips and an even softer smile.

He gave his head a quick shake, and the memory left just as mysteriously as it appeared.

"Zack, you okay?"

"Yeah," he said with a nod, "I think so," but his firm resolve was shaken. With a sigh he said, "Alright, I'll tell you the story, but you have to promise on your mother's grave that you won't tell anyone."

With a stern look on her face, she looked up at him and said, "I promise."

And so he began recounting their harrowing tale of escape from one mad man only to find themselves in the hands of another. They had barely escaped the fire, only to find themselves burning alive in vats of green poison, trapped as human experiments under the direction of a mad scientist bent on world domination. Hojo tried his hand at playing God, splicing human genes with alien ones and giving men the powers of heaven and beyond, but instead of making heroes, he made monsters of men.

None of his supposed friends came to rescue him, at least those who knew of his whereabouts, like Tseng. He couldn't blame those who thought he had passed over into the next life. ShinRa had spread word of his untimely demise, and if ShinRa said you were dead, you were either dead, or as good as dead. They could convince people believe that the sky was green if they wanted to.

In the end it came down to just him and Cloud, both of them united in a fight against the world for their freedom. Everything was going to work out because the good guys always won. At least that's what he thought.

Things went from bad to worse when Hojo separated them and put them in large tanks saturated with Mako. The little hope that they had started to disappear as they both grew weaker by the day. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and months turned into a green eternity.

In the end, it was an angel of mercy that freed him from his prison. Broken, shattered, and sprawled out on the floor, he was hanging on the brink of consciousness. It might have been another dream. He wanted to go back to sleep, fade back into the green oblivion, but he couldn't take his chances. He had to get over to his friend before they were caught, again.

Unfortunately, Cloud wasn't in good shape. He was suspended in Mako like a puppet, invisible strings attached to his jointed limbs, lifeless until someone pulled the strings from above and made him dance. His eyelids were paper-thin and his body was utterly still, except for the small movements of his chest with each shallow breath.

At this point in the story, Zack became silent, stood up, and walked over to the window. He cracked open the blinds just a hair and looked outside. It was a starless night, restless like the ocean, gaseous waves rippling throughout the phosphorus dark, and he felt a sudden chill creep down his spine.

Lilleas sat very still, her hands motionless on her lap.

It was a few minutes before he spoke again, but his back was still toward her. He knew that she was watching him, but he wouldn't let her see his pain. "I thought I knew what despair was before that day, but I was wrong." His voice started to waver, and the next few words poured out of his mouth like syrup, thick and slow, but there was nothing sweet in them, nothing sweet at all. "He was just a kid. Just an innocent kid when I drug him into this whole mess. About your age, Lilleas, and if we hadn't been friends he probably wouldn't be here. He would have been better off. . . " Something within his gut tightened and he struggled to finish the sentence, ". . . if he never knew me."

Lilleas rose from the bed and slowly made her way over to Zack. She threw her arms around his waist and pressed a tearstained-cheek into his back. Her warm tears soaked through his sweater of sweatfaded black. "I'm sorry," she mumbled against him.

He expelled his breath, a release of pent-up sorrow. "Yeah, I'm sorry too." He coughed, pretending to clear his throat, but Lilleas wasn't fooled.

"Who knows about this?"

"Well, besides the crazy-ass scientist that experimented on us, I'm guessing only a few of the higher ups. Oh, and the people that are hunting us. But knowing ShinRa, those people probably think we're monsters."

Incensed, she asked, "Wait, how could they do that to you? Aren't there laws against it?"

"Yeah, I'm sure there are, somewhere, but give someone enough money and they'll turn their head the other way. I did, once." He walked over to the bed where his friend was sleeping, and sat down on the edge next to Cloud's feet. "Before all of this happened I thought people were good at heart, and even those that were bad had some good in there somewhere, but I was wrong. There are some that let the darkness consume them, and for them, there's no turning back."

Zack was about to continue, but Cloud started twitching and gave a low whine. Zack rubbed his friend's shin and said, "It's okay buddy. It's only a dream." He waited until Cloud calmed down before he turned to Lilleas. His voice became grave, quite quiet, "No one with a heart could do this to another human being."

Lilleas stretched out a hand and placed it on Cloud's leg. "Yeah. . ."

Then there was just the stillness, and the silence, and the sound of Cloud breathing, soft and muted. It was a while before either one of them spoke. Zack broke the silence. "Anyway, those goons have been chasing us ever since our escape. We'd been lucky so far, until now."

"They're not going to give up, are they?"

His face became stern, like that of generals about to engage in battle, and he beat his fist against his chest. "Not likely, but if it's a fight they want, then it's a fight they'll get."

Without realizing it, Lilleas copied Zack's enthusiasm. She pumped her fist in the air and cheered, "Yeah!" When she realized what she had agreed to, she paused and asked, "Wait, we're not going to actually fight are we?"

He smiled faintly and said, "Heh, I didn't mean it like that." He directed his attention toward the Buster Sword in the corner of the room. Propped up against the wall, it stood tall and proud, timeless, like a revered icon from an era long ago. Fused into the steel of the blade was the blood of past, present, and future, life in its entirety, everything that had been or would ever be. Such was the burden of a warrior, and it was his to bear. He spoke with a heavy voice, "I won't fight unless I have to. Enough innocent lives have been lost over nothing."

"So what's the plan?" she asked.

"Well, if I know ShinRa, those grunts have the patience of a kid in a candy store. They'll be gone in a week. We just have to wait them out, that's all."

Lilleas looked over at their dwindling food stash: a loaf of bread, half jar of peanut butter, and two half jars of jam. Unlike the rest of the food, the condensed milk was stacked in a neat pyramid. It had given her some purpose amidst the boredom, and she had been proud of it, but now the whole thing seemed pointless. "Do you think we have enough food to last?"

Zack scoffed, "Probably not, but there's nothing we can do about it now. Don't worry, I'll give my share to you and Cloud."

"Oh. . ." she muttered. Lilleas watched her hands. They were moving, as if they had a mind of their own, playing with her skirt, nervously folding and crinkling the edges.

His tone lightened and he gave her a small smile. "Believe me, there are worse things than being hungry. I'll live."

"Well, he can have my share, too."

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves here," Zack said. "How much can one guy eat? He's only human. Well, sort of. . . "

The weight of his words fell heavy upon her shoulders, and her hands become motionless, as if they had died there. A silence passed between them, a momentary pause of mourning for something that was and would never be again. It was a while before she spoke. "Yeah, I guess you're right." She looked up from her dress, but kept her focus on the wall. "So I guess we're going to be here for a few days. Got any more stories?"

"I have a few more up my sleeve."

She turned to face him, trying to hide the smile creeping up on her lips. "Any more with Cloud in them?"

"You really like him, don't you?"

"Perhaps. . . "

"Ha! Perhaps my ass." He noticed her turn red with embarrassment. "Hey, don't worry, I'm just teasing. Cloud's a likeable guy. I'd go after him if I were a chick." Lilleas watched him with mild amusement as he fumbled for the next few words. He stammered, "Uh-I-uh, think that came out wrong. My point is. . ." He found himself unable to finish because the thought flitted away like dust in the wind.

"Cloud's a likeable guy?" she suggested.

"Yeah, that's it, I think. . . " Something was missing, different, and the loss of that which he didn't know made him sorry. "Well, I guess it's time for bed then. There will be plenty of time for stories tomorrow."

"Okay," she said with a reluctant nod. She crawled under the covers and waited for him to do the same, but instead there was a long period of silence punctuated by sighs. She looked over and saw him staring into the distance, his expression frozen, stuck on a thought that he couldn't resolve. She wanted to say something, but she was tired, and her body felt heavy, as if filled with sand, so she fell back into bed, closed her eyes and tried to sleep.

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Sporadic images of zombies flitted through her mind while she slept. In her dreams she was running, always running, through the dark corridors of a castle. Cloud held her hand and led her down the circular staircase. They were fast, but the zombies were faster, gaining ground with every step. Their flesh-thirsty moans filled the air and echoed off the stone walls, existing everywhere at once. It would only be a matter of time before they were cornered against a wall. They had to find the door out of this place and fast.

Finally, they had made it to the bottom of the staircase. The door to freedom was right in front of them, light peeking out through the bottom, taunting them. Cloud turned the handle, and went to push open the door, but it wouldn't budge. She stepped to back to give him room as he attempted to kick down the door, but once again nothing happened. The zombies were plodding along, now only a few steps away.

They smelt of necrotic flesh, like a dead animal left out to rot with muscle tissue broken down till it's unrecognizable, a heap of black and green semi-solid goo. Behind her, Cloud was frantically trying to open the door, but to no avail. The heat of their breath was upon her, rank and nauseating. Her stomach churned. As they came closer and closer, she noticed that they were wearing the unsettling blue uniforms of ShinRa. She pressed herself up against the wall in a futile attempt to blend in with the stones. Now she was within their reach. They lunged. . .

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Her eyes flew open in panic. She tried to scream, but sleep had stolen her voice, and the only thing that came out was a forced silence. After doing a quick scan of the room she realized it was only a nightmare. The clock flashed 1: 47, which meant she'd only been asleep for two hours.

"Damn," she silently cursed. It would be a while before she could relax enough to go back to sleep. The zombies were waiting for her when she closed her eyes, so she turned on the lamp beside her bed, rolled over, and watched Cloud as he slept.

He was asleep on his back, his chest rising and falling in slow even movements, calm and peaceful. She would have been content to watch him all night, but a soft noise drew her attention: someone was crying.

The sound was faint and muffled, as if the noise was coming from the adjacent room. That's when she noticed that Zack was still sitting down at the table, hunched over, trembling. A pile of crumpled tissues were scattered about the table. She realized he must not have noticed her yet. He looked fragile, like a hollow shell of glass that would break at the slightest touch, so she kept silent. Not that there was anything to say, nothing that would change their situation at least.

She slowly lowered herself into bed, being careful not to disturb him. Seconds later, there was a pause of silence followed by a few sniffles, and then more crying. The clock read, '2:05.' It was going to be a long night.

When she woke up again, she was surprised to find that it was morning. She had slept through the rest of the night without any more interruptions. The darkness had lifted and was replaced by soft winter light filtering in through the cracks of the blinds. She looked over and saw Zack in bed with Cloud. He was sitting up in the bed watching TV, as if nothing eventful had happened last night. "Good morning," he said, a bit more cheerful than usual.

Slowly sitting up, she swung her legs over the edge of the bed. "Morning," she said with a yawn. "I had the most horrible dream last night."

"That sucks," he said, keeping his attention directed towards the television.

"Yeah, there were zombies, lots of them, and they were chasing us."

"You mean you and Cloud, right?"

She looked down at her feet, contemplative, and replied, "Yeah. . ."

Zack chuckled lightly, "Figures."

Ignoring him, she continued, "We almost made it out of the ca-building I mean, but the door wouldn't budge, and they were about to eat me, but I woke up."

"Flesh eating zombies, sounds intense."

"Yeah, it was really scary. I had a hard time getting back to sleep. You know, last night," she paused a moment and swallowed hard, but the lump in her throat was still there. "I thought I heard someone crying last night."

He silenced the TV and looked towards her, "What are you talking about?"

She cringed, realizing her mistake only after she had made it, but it was too late to not finish the thought. "I woke up in the middle of the night and heard someone crying."

"Must have been another dream or something. I went to bed shortly after you went to sleep, and Cloud slept like a baby." He turned the volume up on the TV and resumed watching, but his teeth were tight together and the rest of his body was rigid, like he was about to engage in battle.

"Yeah, must have been a dream," she said pensively, trying to reassure herself as much as him. Perhaps the vague vision was nothing but a manifestation of her inner fears. Anything was possible, especially in the dark.

She got up to have some breakfast, and quell the sudden wave of nausea that had surfaced. On her way over to the food, she caught sight of the table, and strewn across the surface were several crumpled white tissues.

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Johnny and Ashwin returned to their motel that night with nothing to show for their efforts but tired bodies and a loss of spirit. Tomorrow would be their last day in Fairton, and unless they found the specimens, their mission was far from over. After this they'd have to move onto another town and start the process all over again.

They got in after twelve that night, too late to do much else but sleep. Ashwin conked out as soon as he hit the covers, not even bothering to change out of his uniform. Johnny stayed up for a while, thinking, dreaming, and scheming. He blathered on to his sleeping friend about how they would someday be rich and successful. He hadn't stopped to think about what he would do if they didn't find the specimens. Failure wasn't an option.

At Johnny's urging, they set out early the next day. They needed to cover a lot of ground if they were going to hit all ten hotels, motels, and inns today. A few days had already passed since they first got word of the specimen sighting, and every day that passed was a lost opportunity.

They walked side by side along the road as they made their way into the center of town. It was silent, save the song of some birds in a nearby tree, twittering joyful and melodic. The cool morning air breathed upon them, smooth against their cloth covered skin. Rising up from the east, the sun painted the sky a golden bronze, gilding the ground below. The river beside them turned into liquid gold, shimmering brilliantly as it followed the twisted path.

Johnny glanced over at the river, and shielded his eyes from the bright light reflecting back at him. Gold, it made him think about money and such, something never far from his mind. He turned to his friend and asked, "So, have you thought about what you're going to do with the reward money?"

"We haven't gotten it yet," Ashwin grumbled.

"What's your problem?" Johnny asked with irritation.

"It's five in the fucking morning, that's my problem."

Johnny chuckled lightly, "And here I thought it was 'cause you didn't get breakfast."

"Nope," pulling a bagel out of his pocket, Ashwin said, "I got that covered."

"Hey man, share the love."

Taking a bite of the bagel, Ashwin said, "No way man, get your own."

Johnny reached over to grab it, but Ashwin pushed him away.

"Ass," Johnny spat.

After a minute or two, Ashwin realized it wasn't worth the grudge Johnny was going to hold against him for the rest of the day. "Fine," he conceded, more tired than irritated. He reached into his opposite pocket and pulled out another bagel. "I was saving this one for a snack, but you can have it."

His face lit up as he received the bagel. "Awesome."

Johnny chewed his food with purpose, like it was a mission, something to be accomplished, while Ashwin gnawed at the dry bagel idly, taking in the scenes of the early morn.

"I had a dream last night," scratching his head, he recanted, "more like a nightmare actually."

"What was it about?" Johnny asked midbite, as if he didn't have time to pause.

"That girl I saw last night, she was in it, and. . ."

Cutting him off, Johnny asked, "Wait, you're still thinking about that?"

"Yeah. . ."

"Hey man, you okay?"

"No," Ashwin replied sourly.

"What's with the moodiness? You're starting to remind me of my girlfriend."

"Fuck off man." Aswhin picked up the pace so that he was about five steps in front of his Johnny, which didn't go unnoticed by either of them.

"Heh, so that dream really got to you huh?"

Aswhin slowed down till they were side by side again and looked over at him with cold, glassy eyes, as if there was no thought behind it, only fear, violent and threatening.

"I guess you don't want to talk about it," Johnny said, and Ashwin nodded, though none too eagerly. "That's cool. We can talk about something else." So Johnny rambled on to fill up the awkward silence.

At long last, they approached the business sector of the city. The buildings stood out sharply against the morning light, their demarcated forms stretching towards the sky, reaching for the rising sun. It made Ashwin feel small, and he could almost feel himself shrinking as he took in the city from a distance.

"Hey," Aswhin said, and Johnny turned suddenly, surprised that his friend was speaking again. "Do you ever think about death?"

Scratching his head, Johnny replied, "Uhhh, not really. I mean, we're soldiers, so it's crossed my mind, but I don't really think about it. It's not like we're in the safest line of work."

"How do you think you're going to die?"

"What kind of fucked up question is that?" Johnny asked.

Ashwin didn't answer. He kept his gaze on the ground, as if the conversation was between him and himself alone. Johnny continued with a tired sigh, "Is this about the nightmare you had last night?"

"Yeah, I guess so. It just got me thinking."

"Look man, you're not going to die."

"How do you know that?" Ashwin snapped.

Johnny teased, "The little girl told me."

Ashwin looked up, saw the smirk on his friend's face, and gave him a shove. "Get out of here man."

With a chuckle Johnny said, "Look, I'm just sayin'." He reached out a reassuring hand and placed it on his friend's shoulder. "You're just thinking too much. You know what you need?"

"What?" Ashwin asked, hopeful, as if his friend might actually be serious.

"You need to get laid."

Ashwin chuckled, "Don't I know it. This is the longest dry spell I've had since boot camp."

"Me too." Johnny sighed, "but I don't know if there will be anyone to go home to after this."

"What, you and Liza are breaking up?"

"Maybe," Johnny said, distant, as though he'd already gotten over the emotional trauma of it all. "Guess I'll just get a bit friendly with my hand."

"That sucks man. Sorry about that."

"Yeah."

Hoping to cheer up his friend, Ashwin suggested, "How about we grab a beer after this is all over?"

"Sounds good to me. Now we just have to find the specimens and our mission is over."

"Alright, now you're talking," Ashwin said with great enthusiasm, "Let's do this!"

And so it began. This was to be the day of victory, or so they thought. Their spirits were high as they entered the first hotel, but there had been no sighting of the specimens there, or anywhere else for that matter. They had no better luck at any of the other places they visited.

Ashwin came to doubt whether the specimens had ever been in Fairton at all. Perhaps someone had been playing a cruel joke on them, but Johnny wasn't convinced. While Ashwin wanted to pack it up and move on to the next town, Johnny wanted to stay in Fairton another week. He had been certain from the first day that they were hot on their trail, and he was still firm in his belief. It would be easier to fit a chocobo through the eye of the needle than to convince him that he was wrong.

The whole plan was against his better judgment, so Ashwin phoned in to their superiors and explained their current situation. After some deliberation, the order was handed out. They were to stay in Fairton for now, the reason being that the neighboring towns were currently being searched by their comrades.

Their strategy was to stay in town and watch for the specimens like a cat does for a mouse. The mouse can hide, but give the cat enough time and he will find it and bring it home for dinner. The mouse has speed and agility, but the cat has patience and willpower. As to the winner of the game, only time would tell.

On the way home they hit a bar and drowned their sorrows in liquor. It did little to solve their problems, but amidst their booze induced haze, the pain of defeat lessened, at least to the point they could return home to face another day.

As they returned to their motel, the friends said little to each other, but they stayed side by side as they mounted the hills and rounded the curves on the path to their temporary home. Shortly after entering their room, the two men got ready for bed, but neither one could sleep. Johnny tossed and turned, while Ashwin stared up at the ceiling. After about an hour of this, Ashwin threw on a coat and stepped outside, away from his friend.

The night felt dark and heavy, as if the sky was about to collapse in on itself and drag the stars through its boundless plasma. Spiraling toward the rip in spacetime, the stars would flash violently on their path of destruction, going out with a burst of energy as they exploded into nothingness.

Home had never felt so far away, and he missed his wife greatly. He pulled out his phone and dialed her number, his fingers acting of their own accord, pressing the familiar numbers in sequence.

A cheerful voice answered from the other side, "Hi, how are you doing?"

"Well, you know, same old same old. Not much happening over here, really. How's the baby?"

The other sighed quite audibly, "Oh, well, she misses her daddy."

The corners of his lips twitched, and he smiled briefly. "Yeah?"

"Here, I'll put her on for you."

His voice took on a singsong falsetto. "Hi Emile, it's your daddy. Do you remember me?"

She gurgled cheerfully in response, which was followed by a several bursts of static. In the background, he could hear his wife saying, "Sorry Emile, daddy's not in the phone."

He chuckled at the realization that his baby was grasping for the phone as if he was inside it. "Yeah, it's me, daddy. I miss you sweetheart. I'll be home soon, and then we can play."

There was a brief rustling over the phone, and then his wife came back on. Her voice was soft and seductive as she said, "She's not the only one that misses you."

Ashwin gulped, hard, and without even noticing it his voice lowered a register. "Yeah, how much do you miss me?"

She'd heard this question many times before. At first she'd tried to quantify the loneliness in her heart, but it always led to a somber moment, so she'd learned to take a more light-hearted approach. "This much," she said, playfully, as if she was a child holding their arms out to give the biggest hug imaginable.

He chuckled, "That much, huh?" He looked around to make sure that he was alone. Even still, he talked softly into the phone. "When I get home, could you wear that thing I bought you? You know, the red lace one."

There was a long pause, and he could tell she was blushing. "Yeah, just for you, but the offer is only good for a month."

He smiled brightly. "Don't worry, I'll be home before you know it."

She smiled in return, "I love you."

"I love you too." Unable to pull himself away, he stayed on the phone, waiting for the dial tone . After it sounded, he slowly closed the phone and slid it into his pocket. The night was dark and cold, eerily still, as if a storm was coming. Little did Ashwin know that in a few days he'd be facing his own storm, the likes of which he had never seen before.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Author's Note:** Well this wasn't exactly a happy chapter, but the next one will be pretty dark. . . dun, dun, dun! *Cue dramatic cat* Lol! Yeah, I guess that's about all I can say without giving anything else away :P

So it's been a while since I last updated _ I think most of you know that I had hip surgery about two months ago, and everything just seemed to fall apart after that. *sigh* Anyway, things are much better now, even though I am working 6-7 days a week at the moment. O_o It's only a temporary thing though! In four more weeks I'll be doing a different pharmacy rotation and I don't have to teach ballet during the summer. I'll have two whole days of freedom! Yay! So I'm hoping the next update will only take me about 4-6 weeks, and then 3-4 weeks after I'm done with this rotation. I don't know, it may be faster *crosses fingers* I hope so! I was working on another story, but I'm taking a break from it until my life becomes a little less crazy. This story is quite enough for me at the moment :P I'm still working on updating the whole story. I finished chapter one, and now I'm moving onto chapter 2. Progress has been slow. . .

An acquaintance of mine (I think that's the best way to say it) suggested I find a beta reader. After I got over my pride, I realized my story could use a bit more help, so from now on the chapters will be beta read. I want to thank the lovely **Cookiecat** and **Blue Jae** for beta reading this chapter for me! I think it's much improved after their help :) Blue Jae just used to do the flashbacks, but now she's agreed to help me with the whole thing, *cough* I mean the whole chapter. Also, thanks to **Demonegg**, **Goopy Sentimentalist**, and **Heather** for their additional help!

I must say that **Cookiecat** is a lovely writer, which is why I trust her with my story. If anyone likes Genesis and/or Angeal I'd recommend her story, "Fragile Bonds." Another good Genesis/Seph/Angeal writer is **sphinxofthenile**. I recommend her stories too! They're on my favorites list if you're curious ;)


	21. Chapter 21

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 21**

_**Beta Readers: Blue Jae **_**and **_**Cookiecat**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Zack lay in bed surrounded by darkness, heavy and oppressive, binding him in place. In his mouth was the sour taste of hunger, sharp and biting, a reminder that it had been a while since he last ate. The pain in his stomach had subsided, as if it had given up the fight.

He reached a hand out to the nightstand, his fingers walking over various objects until they settled on a glass. Rolling over on his side, he brought the glass of water to his lips. It was cool, coating the inside of his mouth and back of his throat as it made its way down, but the relief was short lived.

They needed to get out of this place and get some food. Most of their supplies had run out, everything but the condensed milk, which was rationed for Cloud. They only meant to stay for an extra week to outlast the ShinRa grunts, but Cloud's condition was unstable, so one week quickly turned into two. The days had lost meaning, one fading into the next, as fall gives way to winter, the leaves withering and falling off the dying trees.

Then he looked back, tried to remember how long it had been since their escape. He saw his past as though it were a flat pattern, a boundless plane where everything was laid out and he could see it all at once. Tomorrow and all the days to come were to be a part of that pattern. With quiet astonishment, he thought about it, all that had ever been was the same as all that was to ever be. He had no choice, tomorrow they would leave.

His thoughts came to an abrupt end as his friend beside him stirred. Caught up in the blankets, Cloud struggled like a wounded animal in a trap.

Zack turned towards Cloud and helped untangle him. His voice was soft, empathetic, as though he was speaking to a child. "Geez buddy, how did this happen?"

After freeing Cloud of the blanket snare, he pulled him close and layered the blankets over him comfortably. Cloud's breath came out in fast spurts, warm, ghosting across his cheek. A hand reached over and grasped weakly at Zack's chest, managing to hook some fingers into the fabric of his shirt before falling limp once more. Zack reached over and wrapped his hand around Cloud's. "It's okay Cloud, I'm here. Everything is going to be okay. "He paused, letting the words settle in the darkness before continuing. "How are you feeling?"

Cloud gave a low whine, tightening his grip on Zack's shirt.

"You probably need some more pain medicine, huh?"

There was a sigh from Cloud, deep and mournful, a sound of acceptance, of coming to terms with an unbearable burden.

Zack pulled Cloud closer and gave a sigh of his own, an echo of the one before. Then there was just the silence and the sound of Cloud breathing, deep and slow. His grip on Zack's shirt had relaxed. "Still just a kid," Zack said, his voice flat, somber. "Don't worry Spike. I'll get us out of this mess."

Then he turned to face the ceiling, directing his attention forward, toward the future and away from shadows of the past. He spoke in the manner of generals preparing their soldiers for battle, sharp and powerful without a trace of malice. "Tomorrow we leave." He made a fist with his free hand. "Yes, tomorrow."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Lilleas awoke to the sound of Zack sharpening his sword, hardened steel gliding across stone; the solemn hymn of a warrior. As her eyes adjusted to the light of day, she sat up in bed. She saw him over by the table sliding his sword against a stone in slow even strokes, gentle almost, like the caress of a lover. His eyes were focused intently on the task, as if nothing else existed, and the rest of the world was but a mere background.

As she continued watching, she no longer felt like an observer standing on the edge, but an intruder on the private act of a man with a woman. With the morbid curiosity of a child, her eyes remained fixed on the scene, and she waited in bed, sitting ramrod straight against the headboard. It wasn't until after he finished that he noticed she had forgotten to swallow. She waited for him to speak, but he did not, so with great hesitation she began, "You must really love that sword."

Propping the sword up against the wall, he crouched down to carefully examine the edge. He kept his gaze steady on the sword as he spoke, "Love doesn't begin to describe it. There's not another one like it in the world."

"Where did you get it?"

He stilled, shifting his gaze to the floor. The words came out slowly, as he labored over each one, "My mentor gave it to me years ago." With great care, he strapped the sword onto his back and made his way over to the door.

"Hey, where are you going?" she asked, surprised, rising from the bed.

"Out." He jerked his head towards Cloud, "Take care of Spike for me while I'm gone."

Her voice took on a panicked air, "Gone? What do you mean gone? Where are you going?"

He replied in a cool tone, "Out to the store. We need food and Cloud needs some more pain medicine. Don't worry, I'll be back."

Reaching out a hand, she cried, "Wait!" As he turned towards her, she withdrew her outstretched hand. "What about ShinRa?"

"It's been two weeks since the sighting. If they haven't found us by now, they're not going to find us."

"How do you know?" she spat out.

"I just know." Seeing that she was not easily dissuaded, he walked over to her. She turned her head away from him, taking care to avert his gaze as he approached. He smiled, placed his hands on her shoulders, and gave her a gentle shake. "Hey don't worry about it. I'm going to go get some food and come back. We'll eat and then leave later tonight. Everything is going to be okay. Trust me."

"Yeah. . . "

Then he made his way over to Cloud, crouched down beside the bed, and playfully ruffled his friend's hair. "Be good for Lilleas while I'm gone. I'll be back before you know it." Cloud gave a sleep husky moan in response. "That's my boy," Zack said with satisfaction, a smile on his face.

Standing up, he turned to Lilleas and said, "Alright, looks like everything is good. I'll see you guys later."

Lilleas darted over to the door and threw herself across it. The morning light flickered before going out, and the shadows that roamed the room engulfed it in darkness, wild and fierce. Zack approached, and stopped about a foot away from her. "What are you doing?" he asked, annoyed.

Mustering up her courage, she asked, "What if you don't come back?"

"Lilleas, this is ridiculous. Nothing is going to happen to me." He paused, waiting for her to move but instead she dug her heels into the thinly carpeted ground and furrowed her brow. He hung his head in exasperation, half-expecting her to have moved when he looked up, but she was still there. Catching her unaware, he lifted her off the ground, her legs dangling in the air as she was removed from her previous spot, and set her down. Without looking back, he headed towards the door.

Trying to sound as commanding as possible, Lilleas said, "I don't want you to go."

His voice was dogged now, yet he kept his head up straight. "Everything is going to be fine." Placing his hand on the doorknob, he turned it, and opened the door. A sliver of natural light crept into the room, tracing its way along the wall, fighting off the darkness. He paused in the doorway as a gust of fresh air made its way in, a sharp contrast to the stale smell of the room.

One foot had made it past the doorframe when he heard a voice, sudden and thin. "Isn't that what you always say to Cloud?" She looked at him in quiet surprise, as though she did not believe the sound of her own voice. It was foreign and strange, as if it had come from someone else.

The door shut, quietly, and he stepped back inside the room. Placing his forehead against the door, he could feel her eyes on him, burning into the back of his head.

Her voice shook as she spoke. "Everything is going to be okay. Isn't that what you say to Cloud?"

He was still facing the door, but he spoke loud enough for her to hear. "Damn it, what else am I supposed to say?" He turned to face her, both fists clenched now. "That everything is going to hell and there's no chance for us? Is that what you want?"

Her voice lost the confidence from before as she answered, "No. I-I don't know what I want. . ." He did not help her as she struggled for words, a meaning to the hopelessness. "I don't know what I want, but do you always have to be so—so _damn_ optimistic?"

"Because. . ." His voice ceased, faded. Out of the corner of his eye he saw his friend, lifeless on the sheets, pinned down by his immobility, his limbs in disarray, like a dead bug pinned to a display board, a scientific specimen. Zack's face cracked with a grimace, faint, fleeting. The tension left his fists, and he found himself walking over to Cloud, his feet leading the way. His voice was hollow and empty as he spoke, "Well, what else is there?" He took a seat near his friend, and cradled his own head in his hands, tired and despondent.

Lilleas looked down at her hands upon the table. She was silent, musing upon the movement of her hands, preoccupied and inconsequential.

Zack sighed audibly, and ran his hands through his hair. "Shit. I didn't want it to come to this."

Her hands stopped moving, and she looked up from the table, "Didn't want it to come to what?"

Without speaking, he dug a hand into his pocket and pulled out a handful of change. He walked over and dumped it in her already open hands. Then he looked at her long and hard, as if her life depended on it; his eyes being the rope holding her over the precipice, and she was scared to look down, let go, and fall to the depths below. Holding her gaze steady he said, "This is enough money to buy several antidotes in case something ever happens to me."

She broke contact with his eyes to look down at the pile of coins in her hands and could feel herself falling, suspended in air with that sick feeling of dread, knowing she was going to hit bottom. "I don't understand. This would buy enough antidotes to kill someone."

Zack flinched, and his voice came out as a choked whisper, "Exactly."

It felt as if the ground rushed up beneath her, suddenly, knocking the air out of her: she had hit bottom. The color drained out of her face and she was now very pale, as if she were on the cusp of life, death at its inception. Her hands lost their strength, the ability to hold, and the coins came crashing down, scattering as they hit the ground. She leaned onto the table for support, slowly regaining her breath and the ability to speak. "I can't do it. " She looked up at him, pleading, "Why can't I save him?"

"It's not that easy. You think you can take care of him? Carry him around, feed him, bathe him, calm him down from his nightmares, change his soiled clothes, and take care of his wound?" He didn't wait for her to answer. "Even if by some miracle of the gods you could do all that, you think no one would notice a little girl dragging around a semi-comatose man? What's going to happen when they catch you, catch _him_?"

"They won't catch us," she answered back with all the grace of a child, insistent and stubborn.

With biting sarcasm he replied, "Yeah, you against the world's largest army. It doesn't take a genius to figure out how that's going to end." His anger rose, restless like a beast, so he paced, like a tiger in a cage, slow and plodding in its restrained rage. "You know what they're going to do when they get their hands on him? I'll tell you what they're going to do. They're going to drag his ass back to the lab and finish what they started. It won't be long before there's nothing left of him. He used to be so full of life and now look at him." She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, keeping her gaze focused on the ground. "Look at him Lilleas," he commanded, but she did not. "Look at him," he said with increasing intensity.

"I already know what he looks like," she said coolly.

"Damn it! Look at him."

"No!" she said more afraid then angry, scared of what she might see.

Then there was a sudden pause, as if time had stopped, a moment for the world to stop and breathe. Out of this silence was born a scream, sharp and sudden. "No!" It came from Cloud. The terror had found him, crept up on him insidiously while he was turned away.

Almost instantaneously, both Zack and Lilleas turned towards Cloud, the former out of instinct and the latter out of concern. "Shit, I think he heard us," Zack said, before rushing over to his friend.

Cloud continued screaming. "No, no, no, no, no! NO!"

Zack took off his sword and propped it against the nightstand. Then he eased himself into the bed and scooped up his friend, while Lilleas hung behind, hovering over the scene like a shadow. Clutching Cloud's head to his chest, over his beating heart, he shushed him, "It's going to be okay."

Cloud gave a muffled cry, almost pained, "Noooo."

"Ssssh, don't say that. I didn't mean what I said. It's just that I promised you I would never let one of those bastards touch you again, ever." His voice rose in anger, restrained, "I'll rip out their balls before I ever let it happen again." Zack pulled his friend closer, wrapping his arms around him tightly, as if he was afraid someone was going to come and rip Cloud from his arms. Perhaps he was afraid, nothing in his life had ever been certain, at least in the past few years, which might as well have been a lifetime. His voice softened, "You're safe with me Cloud."

"Zack. . ." Cloud's voice was fading now, distant, as he made his way into that other world, the one of phantasms, illusions, and nightmares. Zack pressed a kiss on Cloud's forehead, a memento for the long journey back, a remembrance to keep them tied together.

"That's right buddy, I'm here. We're both going to make it though because we're survivors." Zack could feel the man in his arms weaken, his muscles going slack, but he wanted to hold onto Cloud a little longer.

From a distance Lilleas watched the scene with avid interest, as one would watch an engaging movie, caring about the characters but detached from them still. She didn't really know them and perhaps she never would, at least not like they knew each other.

After a few minutes, Zack was able to put his friend back to bed, taking one last look at him before strapping on his sword and walking over to the door. As he passed by Lilleas their eyes met briefly, but not on the same level. It was as if he didn't really see her, not in outright refusal but something more like indifference.

Zack turned the doorknob, opened the door, and paused, contemplating. Awash in natural light, he looked down past his left shoulder towards the shadows. He spoke, his voice grave, quite sincere. "You have much to learn about dreams and honor. Losing them is a fate far worse than death."

With that statement he left, his words lingering in the room long after his absence. It was a while before Lilleas could move; find the strength in her muscles to walk. When she was able, she made her way over to the coins scattered on the ground and started to gather them into a neat pile. Perhaps a time would come when she would need them, perhaps.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Aswhin could hear the sound of a far clock strike noon, the long drawn out chime heralding the death of another hour. The finality of it reminded him of his long stay in Fairton. Each day ended with a check on his calendar, the dark ink emphasizing the end of the day, another one down, many many more to go. What had started out as a simple mission was quickly turning into something complex.

There was a new development in the case a few days ago. There had been a random sighting of the specimens, which was confirmation that they had been in Fairton recently. Orders were handed down for John and Ashwin to remain in Fairton and security was tightened in the surrounding cities.

The runaway specimens were proving to be an elusive catch, the likes of which ShinRa had never seen before. There were rumored to have been other specimens that escaped from Hojo's lab, but they only lasted for a day or so, hardly long enough to cause a stir. Something was different about these specimens, and Ashwin was determined to find out, end this mission, and return home to his family.

Behind him, dark clouds loomed in the distance, a large amorphous mass encroaching upon a blue-grey sky. In the air, he could feel the tension, palpable, clammy, as if something was about to happen. It sent a shudder down his spine. He looked around him to find the townspeople carrying on with their normal activities.

Out of the crowd, he spotted a young couple pushing a stroller. The woman's hair was a dark wavy brown, just like his wife. It had been a long time since he'd taken a casual stroll with his wife and child, longer than he could remember now. His followed them with his eyes until they rounded the corner and disappeared out of sight.

The phone in his pocket rang, bringing him out of his thoughts. He picked it up and saw that it was from Johnny. Before he could get a word out, the voice from the other end of the line asked, "So, anything new?"

"No not really," Ashwin answered, simply.

"You sure?" asked Johnny, his voice a bit desperate.

"Yeah, I'm really sure." After a pause, Aswhin continued, "Shouldn't you be asleep?"

"Well that's the thing, I can't get to sleep. These damn sleeping pills aren't doing the job."

Aswhin smirked, "So you decided to annoy me instead, thanks."

"Anytime man, anytime," Johnny chuckled.

"Why don't you just relax, you know, take a hot bath or something. You're too worked up over this whole thing."

With a sigh Johnny said, "Yeah, I suppose so. Alright, well I guess I'll try going back to sleep. Let me know if anything happens."

"Alright, I'll talk to you later man."

Sliding the phone back into his pocket, he started off towards a café to get lunch. It was a white building with a small patio underneath a blue-plaid overhang and a line that extended past the door. As he walked toward the building the loud chatter quieted to a nervous silence, as if this place was a church with some deity reigning above, omniscient, judging them for their sins. He became self-aware as their eyes followed him, watching, waiting for him to strike out. As of late, it seemed that anti- ShinRa sentiment was increasing in the world. He tried to shrug it off, blame it on coincidence, but as he moved through various towns he found that this was not so.

He stepped up to the counter clutching his wallet. He believed that the people had all stopped talking to watch him, because the only sounds he could hear now were from the kitchen, knifes chopping, meat frying, and coffee brewing. The cashier spoke to him quickly while taking his order and managed to do the whole thing without stopping to look up, not even once. He picked a sandwich, something that was portable and could be taken outside. Ashwin looked at the man as he handed him the money, challenging him to look up, but the cashier kept his eyes glued to the counter. 'Perhaps he's just busy, that's all. I must be imagining things,' Ashwin thought to himself.

When it was ready, Ashwin took his meal and walked outside, not stopping to look back. He found an empty park bench and sat down, making sure that he was alone before he settled down. He unwrapped the outer layer of white paper from the sandwich with care and started to eat. Slowly he could feel the heat in his belly spread to the rest of his body, and he started to relax. Food always seemed to have that effect on him, a rock of stability when the waves of life tried to drown him, crush him, and swallow him whole, yet still, even after the sandwich he felt like he was sinking.

After he finished eating he moved on to patrolling the streets, walking up and down the corridors of the city, looking for any suspicious characters. The paved road stretched out before him, tired, worn down by years of activity, by both man and automobile alike. The city had been rebuilt, but the cracks in the pavement still showed, weeds growing up through the breaks, finding an opportunity for life where there was none.

He walked the path before him, tracing his steps from the day before, and the many days before that. He made his way all the way up to a grocery store when in the midst of the crowd he saw the saw the sharp glint of a sword. The sword was massive, almost as large as the man who carried it, a strapping young man in his early twenties, built of finely muscled proportions, carrying several large grocery bags. Then thinking started, quick and swift, 'Large sword, black hair, blue eyes, SOLDIER uniform, about six feet. This man perfectly fits the description I was given. That's the specimen!' He paused, as his thoughts started racing, uncontrollable now, and he couldn't decide what to do next. He watched in horror as the specimen started walking away and he was standing still, frozen in place.

Over the top of the crowd, Ashwin could see the specimen's black spikes bobbing up and down, proudly, like the plumage of a chocobo. Now he could feel his feet moving, and he followed along, watching for the black spikes and the glint of the sword. He stayed back, far enough so that the specimen couldn't see him, but close enough that he didn't lose sight of him.

The large crowd served as an advantage for this covert mission. He weaved in and out, making his way through the vast maze of people. The specimen kept walking, seemingly indifferent to the curious glares he received, but at one point he stopped. Ashwin didn't wait for him to turn around. He leapt behind a rather portly couple having a conversation off to the side of the road. Trying to blend in, he pretended to catch his breath, huffing and puffing in a slightly exaggerated fashion. After a short while, he peered around the couple only to find the specimen disappearing out of sight.

His feet led the way once more, faster this time, his rubber soles muffling the sound of impact, boot against ground. As they made their way through town, the crowd started to thin, and Aswhin found it increasingly difficult to keep himself well-concealed. He made his way over to the nearest building and tucked himself behind the large supporting column. He hurriedly dug into his pack and pulled out a pair of binoculars, ShinRa's latest design, 18x50 with image stabilization. It only took a few seconds to bring the specimen into focus and now he was back on the hunt.

"Damn, that's one hell of a sword," Aswhin muttered under his breath. 'Wonder where he got that. That's no ShinRa-issue sword,' he thought, quietly. Eventually the specimen moved out of range, and Ashwin followed suit, his movements careful and calculated, like a predator hunting his prey.

As they made their way toward the edge of town, the well preserved buildings gave way to dilapidated and abandoned ones, relics from an era long past, a time of prosperity that had soured into economic depression. The specimen walked through this area the way a god would walk through the dominion of hell, head forward and eyes straight ahead, defying the chaos in his midst. Ashwin hung back a few extra steps.

The pair walked through the rough area of town before coming upon a motel. Ashwin paused for a moment as a cord of thinking started, swiftly, connecting past and present. "We went to this motel. This is the same one with that scared girl, but I thought. . . I thought they weren't there. Shit, Johnny isn't going to believe this. They were here under our noses the whole time."

He picked up his phone, his sweaty palm struggling to hold onto the device, and dialed his friend's number. His grip intensified with each empty ring, the silence between mocking, taunting him to lose his composure. He was put through to voicemail. "Damn it Johnny, where are you? I found the specimens! Call me back as soon as you get this. I'm going to phone Lieutenant Smith for backup. "

As he dialed the phone number of his superior, he said half-aloud, half thinking, "Where is that knucklehead? Probably doubled up on those sleeping pills." The ringing stopped and there was a pause before he spoke. "Lieutenant Smith?"

The voice from the other end came out direct, like an order, "Affirmative."

"Infantryman Ashwin, sir. Located the specimens. 'Town House Motel' in Fairton." There was a moment of silence, tentative, as if the other was about to speak, but did not. "Lieutenant Smith?"

A few sounds of static, and then a voice. "Copy that. Standby and wait for support. Two hours max. The specimens are to be held under all circumstances. Understood?"

"Roger. I'll try my best," Ashwin responded.

The phone slipped out of his hand as he went to put it away, but he managed to grab it and put it into his pocket. He walked over to a large tree nearby and squatted down behind it. Now he was within firing range of the motel, so he pulled his rifle out of his scabbard.

Pointing it up towards the sky, he cocked the rifle and pulled the charging handle back to make sure there were no bullets caught in the chamber. Then he inserted a loaded magazine under the trigger and pushed up until the catch engaged. He brought his hand down sharply on the magazine, it stayed. The gun was ready now, ready to aim and fire.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Zack made his way into the motel room to find Lilleas reclined on the bed next to Cloud, watching TV. Laughter sprung forth from the TV and she laughed in turn, but it was like an echo, faint and empty with no mirth at all.

Setting the bags down, he pulled out a few chocolate bars and made his way over to her. He held them out to her and said, "I know you like mint chocolate so I got you some. Thought it might make you feel better."

As she turned towards him, he offered a small smile, and she found herself smiling in return. "Thanks." She tore into the wrapper and stuffed a large chunk of the chocolate bar into her mouth.

He gave a light chuckle, "Don't eat the wrapper."

Placing a hand over her mouth full of chocolate, she said, "I was really hungry."

"Glad you enjoyed it." With a glint of excitement in his eyes, he said, "Oh hey, I got something for Cloud too."

Lilleas sat up in bed and watched as Zack made his way over to a large bag, and pulled something out, a large amorphous bundle.

"What's that?" she asked, eyeing the bundle.

"It's a blanket." He crouched down beside Cloud and held the blanket up to him for inspection. "So Spike, what do ya think?"

Cloud stared back at him with eyes glazed over and a blank expression, as if his face had been drained of all emotion.

"Come on, you have to feel how soft it is." Taking grip of Cloud's hand, Zack moved his friend's limp fingers against the nap of the blanket. There was still no response from Cloud and Zack sighed in turn.

"I'm sure he'll appreciate it when it's cold outside," she said encouragingly.

"Yeah, you're probably right. He's bundled up in blankets right now. It's not like he needs another one." Zack reached out and brushed an errant spike off of Cloud's face, tucking it behind his ear. "Well I guess it was a tough day for you. Then again, what day isn't."

He stood up with a grunt and walked toward the pile of bags. "Alright, I'm starved. It's time to eat." Realization struck, and he paused momentarily. "I should probably get Cloud his pain medicine first." He turned to face Lilleas, who had already started devouring a second candy bar. "You think you could give me a little help?"

"Oh yeah, sure."

She hopped up from the bed and helped Zack prepare the medicinal tincture and administer it to Cloud. Then they made several sandwiches and ate till their bellies were more than full. They knew it would be a while before they could feast again.

"Oh man, I just want to curl up and take a nap right now," Zack said as he sluggishly rose from the table.

"Why can't you?" Lilleas asked.

"I just want to get out of this place. We've been here long enough as it is. Why don't we pack up now?"

Lilleas nodded, though none too eagerly, and helped him pack up their meager belongings. To be thorough, Zack checked under the bed to ensure nothing was left behind.

Zack took a brief survey of the room, and then walked over to his friend, now asleep in the bed. With a sigh he said, "Now comes the hard part, getting Cloud up and ready."

After much fussing on Cloud's part, Zack managed to rouse him and get him standing on his feet. As they made their way over to the door, Zack said, "I don't know how far we'll be able to travel today. He hasn't moved much in the past few weeks so we'll have to go easy on him." Lilleas walked in front of them and took responsibility of opening the door and closing it behind them.

Zack looked out toward the horizon and saw the dark clouds curling in the sky, angry, as if they had come to spite the daylight. "Looks like a storm is coming. Good, the rain should cover our tracks."

Suddenly, the sound of an explosion ripped through the air, and birds flew out of the trees in every direction. Zack's body reacted instinctively, pulling him down to the ground with Cloud trailing after. Lilleas let out a choked wail and ducked down behind the pair.

"Gunfire! Get down!" He put his hand on Cloud's back and pushed him down to the ground. Lilleas looked up at him in soft, wide horror. Another bullet whizzed by, nearly striking Zack's shoulder. "Damn. They found us," he growled.

Behind him he could hear the muffled crying of a girl. It didn't register until he turned around and saw Lilleas' eyes glisten with moisture. He pulled out her tightly clenched hand and opened it. Pressing the room key into her cold and clammy hand, he said, "Take Cloud into the room and stay there till I come and get you."

She looked up from her hand, slowly, with mouth agape, as if she did not believe it, could not believe what was happening.

"Do it now!" he cried.

His voice brought her out of her trance, and she drug Cloud towards their room.

He rose from the ground and unsheathed his sword. With eyes wide and nostrils flared, he said, "I'll be back." When he spoke, Lilleas knew he was not addressing her, he was not addressing anyone at all.

He turned toward the source of the sound. On the crest of a hill there was a large tree, and behind it was a rifle rearing its ugly head, the black ring of the muzzle pointed at him. It was about to strike once more.

Zack took flight, his feet barely making contact with the ground as headed toward the rifle. Anticipating the shot, he jagged to the left before it came towards him. He saw the glint of human eyes peeking out from the tree. For an instant they looked at one another, and Zack could see the wild fear and panic in Ashwin's eyes. Then the rifle vanished behind the tree and its owner took off running.

The ShinRa infantryman dashed around wildly, like a rabbit that was being hunted. He started in one direction before changing his mind and turning to go the other direction. Zack followed, gaining on him with every step. Now he could hear the panting and desperate breath of the man, who by now was ragged from running.

In a desperate attempt at survival, the ShinRa infantryman turned around and brandished his rifle like a club. His teeth were bared, and a thread of spittle hung from the corner of his mouth. Zack approached the man cautiously.

The man swung the rifle, hoping it would connect with Zack's jaw, but it was intercepted by the sword instead. The ShinRa grunt cocked the rifle back, ready to administer a hit, but he never got that chance. Zack jumped on him and severed his neck with one blow of the Buster Sword.

The last thing Ashwin saw were the glowing eyes of a monster, blue flames alight like a creature from another world, beautiful and deadly.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Author's Note: **

First off I would like to thank** Goopy** **Sentimentalist** for helping me with this chapter! She held my hand as I wrote this. Well, virtual hand holding. Lol. *Hugs* I must also thank **Cookiecat** for her extensive military knowledge. In addition to beta reading, she helped me so much with the military parts of this chapter. Of course, many thanks to both **Cookiecat** and **Blue Jae** for beta reading for me ^^ *Hugs*

So this was one of the reasons I kept Lilleas around for so long. Okay, some of you may think it's OOC of Zack to want to kill Cloud, especially considering the fact that he tells Cloud to live in the end. I think it's keeping in line with the whole 'dreams and honor' ideal. Zack actually saw some human experiments that had been left in Mako too long, and they turned into monsters, not even recognizable as humans. Zack would not want this for his beloved friend. Of course, he still holds onto the hope that they're both going to make it. So you can see why this chapter was hard to write.

If any of you are readers, there's a great book out there, _The Road_, by Cormac McCarthy. I highly recommend it as McCarthy is one of my favorite authors and is a master at lyrical prose. It reminds me a lot of Zack and Cloud, and if you read the story you'll see what I mean. It's the story of a father and son trying to make it in a post apocalypse world. The world is infested with cannibals and they often harvest humans for body parts. (Yeah, it gets a bit gory) Anyway, the father loves his son more than life itself and at some point in the story is left with only one bullet in his gun. He is willing to give it to the son (kill him) in case they get found by cannibals. That way the son doesn't have to suffer, but unfortunately it would mean that the father would be tortured/eaten alive/harvested for body parts. I actually came up with the idea before I read this book, but this sort of confirmed it for me.

I realized that I never made this clear. I actually have played both Final Fantasy VII and Crisis Core. In fact, I played FF VII when it first came out ;) I was 13 then. I was a big fan of Aerith at the time. I didn't like Cloud until after I played Crisis Core and fell in love with Zack. So if there was something I included or didn't include, there's probably a reason behind it. You can always ask if you're curious ;)

As to why this took so long. Well, I was working 70 hours a week for a while. That ended like four weeks ago, but I also have health problems. Hoping that will get cleared up eventually. Also, this was a hard chapter to write. I think Zack found it hard too. . .


	22. Chapter 22

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 22**

_**Beta Readers: Blue Jae and Cookiecat**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Rating: Mature. **This chapter has some gory content. I thought a warning was in order. Nothing too bad, but it might offend some readers, especially those that aren't prepared.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Stretched out before Zack lay the body of a man, the sinew and bone of his neck severed, his head twisted around looking back, and his cold, hard eyes fixed open in surprise, as if waiting for an attack that had already come. Zack took one look at the body, nothing more. It was not his job to mourn for this man. With hundreds of men after him, the timer was already ticking. Letting his concentration falter for more than a second would be deadly.

He gave his sword a quick shake, letting the blood fly off in a crimson arc and splatter on the ground. Sheathing the blade, he turned to go back towards the motel. A crowd had already assembled outside the motel, and he could feel their eyes following him with a mixture of fear and curiosity. He looked down upon them, their still and quiet faces, expectant, as if waiting for him to strike out once more, so he flared his nostrils and threw them an indomitable glare. The crowd dispersed, running in all directions at once, a group of people in mass hysteria. Doors were bolted in quick succession as the patrons of the motel haphazardly scrambled into their rooms.

Running the rest of the way, Zack reached their room quickly. With a shaky hand, he fished the key from his pocket and opened the door. As he stepped inside, he immediately noticed that there was no sign of either Lilleas or Cloud. "Lilleas," he called out.

"Here," came a muffled sound from an indeterminate location.

"Where is here?" He was curt, almost to the point of being sharp.

"Over here," came the voice again, stronger this time, "under the blanket in the corner."

His attention was drawn to the corner with a large blanket settled over the forms of two people. He walked over and pulled it off in a brisk motion. "Hey, are you guys all right?"

Lilleas gave a weak nod in response as she eyed Zack apprehensively. His upper half was covered in blood, and he smelled of death, a metallic scent that stung her nostrils. Instinct kicked in, and before she even realized the reason behind her fear, she backed into the furthest recess of the corner, like a half-scared cat.

Crouching down, he reached out a hand and placed it on her shoulder. "Hey, it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm still the same old Zack." He gave a small smile and waited until she eased up before speaking once more, "See nothing to be afraid of, right?"

Another small nod as she stood up, weaker than the one before. She watched with detachment as Zack quickly inspected Cloud for injuries. With a sigh, he said, "Thank gods you guys weren't hurt. Now come on, let's go." He looped Cloud's arm around his shoulder and hoisted him up to a standing position and they ambled over to the door.

As he stepped outside, he noticed that Lilleas wasn't behind them. She hadn't moved from the corner and was standing stone-still, arms hanging down limp by her side, eyes fixed on something beyond Zack, something that he couldn't see, or perhaps wasn't even there.

"Hey you okay?" Zack asked, trying to sound compassionate, but hurried still.

She paused momentarily and then shook her head softly.

Zack looked out in the distance, scanning the horizon before speaking, "How about we discuss this later? We _really _need to get going."

"No." The word came out firm, like the period at the end of a sentence, the end of discussion.

"What do you mean no? Lilleas, this isn't a game. Do you want them to catch us and drag Cloud back to the lab?"

She stood firmly fixed to the ground, like a sapling tree, its young roots embedded in the earth, anchoring it down. After taking a deep breath, she spoke, "You killed him didn't you?"

His grip on Cloud tightened. "I didn't have much of a choice. It was either him or us."

"You could have just scared him and run him off. You didn't need to kill him, did you?" There was a pause, tentative, as if neither one of them knew what to say next. Finally, she looked up at him, her voice desperate and pleading, "What if he had a family?"

Zack flinched as his heart clutched at the biting words. "That's just the way it is. That guy knew what he was getting into when he enlisted in the army. I didn't make the rules, someone else did. ShinRa."

Cloud groaned, suddenly, and Zack could feel the man under his arm going limp, pulling him down. "Hey Cloud, you okay?"

Another moan followed by a yawn. "Come on Cloud, this is no time for a nap. I'll let you have one later." Zack pulled him up gently and turned to face Lilleas. "Look we've really got to go. Are you coming with us or staying here?"

She looked at Zack, then at Cloud, and then at Zack once more. "I don't know. . ."

With a wan smile, Zack said, "You're a smart kid. I'm sure you'll figure things out." He looked over at Cloud, his heavy lidded eyes straining to stay open. "I guess we better go."

A brief wave later and they were gone, walking out of her life. She felt empty at once, as if she were a vase and the impact of their absence shattered her, suddenly, and she was no longer whole.

She was silent through the whole ordeal and silent still as fear and desperation uprooted her from her spot, and sent her running towards the door. Peering around the doorframe, she saw them walking away, as fast as Cloud's gait would carry them, toward the forest in the far distance. "Wait!" she screamed, her voice trailing after them.

Zack paused briefly, a reaction to the loud noise, but then continued walking as before. Lilleas ran after them as fast as her legs would carry her, feet pounding into the soft earth, splashing mud up behind her. They didn't slow down, but she didn't expect them to, so she kept running until she caught up with them.

Panting and breathless, she sidled up next to Zack. They were silent for a while, both of them looking straight ahead as they walked. "Hey. You came back," he said, without surprise, as if he expected it.

"Yeah, well, someone needed to take care of Cloud," she replied, simply.

"Heh. Of course." There was a pause after he spoke, tentative, but there was nothing more to say.

Above them the sky darkened while the clouds curled in anger. Rain started to tumble down, falling in fat droplets upon their dry skin. Then it started to pour, but they trudged on, the rain pelting them in sheets, drenching them from head to toe.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Tseng could barely hear himself think over the roar of the helicopter. He sat on the edge of his seat, slumped over, exhausted. The call to ShinRa headquarters regarding the specimens had come long after the sun had set. Roused out of a light sleep, he threw on a suit, combed his hair back into a ponytail, and slipped out of his apartment, a shadow in the night.

The mission brief had been delivered as he made his way to the helicopter: "Find the specimens and return them to ShinRa headquarters, dead or alive. Preferably alive." He cringed inwardly upon receipt of the message, its blatant meaning in-between the lines. Hojo couldn't perform experiments on dead specimens. Even a Turk had limits, and Hojo surpassed all tolerability.

Tomorrow would come and he would be gone. He had already made arrangements regarding his absence. Cissnei would wake up in the morning to find this message on her PHS: "This is Tseng. I was called out on urgent business so I'll be gone tomorrow. Finish the summary on the recent AVALANCHE uprising in Sector 7. Report to Reno for further instructions, and call me if anything important happens."

He sat back in his seat, listening to the rhythmic thwop of the propellers overhead, punctuating his thoughts. It was the closest thing to sleep he was going to get in the next twenty-four hours, but nothing that a strong cup of coffee couldn't handle.

When he first heard word of the specimens' escape from Nibelheim, he felt both exhilaration and a lightness of the spirit, something he had not felt for years. Perhaps it was hope that allowed him to believe Zack might still be alive after all the time that had passed. No, he dared not call it that. Hope was something that existed in the hearts of starry-eyed military recruits, men with dreams as big as Midgar itself. He'd been like that, once, before he'd seen the depths of depravity humanity could sink to, but it was not his job to right the wrongs of the world. That was someone else's burden to bear.

Reaching into his pocket, he fingered the edges of the well-worn envelope, pink hearts decorating the front and back of it. This love letter was only one of many that Aerith had entrusted him to deliver to Zack. At first he meant to humor her; he was a Turk, an assassin, not a damn mail courier. But the way she looked at him, soft green eyes brimming with faith, as if she never doubted him, made him come undone. He couldn't say no to her. Then again, he never could.

He thought he'd seen it all throughout the years, humans mutated into monsters, babes ripped from their mothers arms, and innocent men shot in cold blood, but nothing tore at his heart as much as this, that is, if he even had one left. Eighty-six letters written over the course of four years to a man that was either dead or as good as dead. If that wasn't love, then love didn't exist.

His grip tightened around the envelope. Zack had to survive, at least until this letter was delivered. He would see to it, even if it was the last thing he did.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.`**_

The sharp buzz of the alarm woke Johnny from a sound sleep. He sat up, groggy, confused, and disoriented. "Must have taken one too many of those sleeping pills," he muttered, wiping his hand over his face. He reached over and grabbed the PHS on his nightstand. There were ten voice messages and over half were from Ashwin. 'Damn, something big must have happened while I was asleep.'

After putting the phone down, he went over to his pile of clothes, thrown over the back of a chair. He jammed his legs into the pants, threw on his shirt, and stuffed his feet into a pair of boots, haphazardly laced. There was no time for a shower, so he applied a few extra sprays of body deodorant. He could hear the sound of rain falling down, pelting the window of his room, so he grabbed his poncho before leaving, along with his wallet and phone.

Once outside, he was assaulted by a fresh gust of wind, thick with rain, making him wish he was back in bed curled up under the warm blankets. He looked back toward the room, and then silently cursed himself for being weak.

He pulled out his PHS, drew it under his poncho, and listened to the messages; a voice tinged with panic, only accentuated by the tinny speakers of the phone. That didn't sound like his friend. He gripped the phone and pressed it close to his ear. Ashwin confirmed his suspicions; the specimens had been found. They were at Vagabond Inn, which was on the other side of town. He'd have to walk into town, and then hitch a cab ride from there.

He pulled the phone back to look at the time receipt of the message. "Shit, this was four hours ago." Grotesque images of the many possibilities played through his mind, like a movie, but they all ended the same, screams and ripping flesh. He flinched, and then reminded himself he was always thinking the worst. Maybe it was okay. Maybe. . .

The dirt road leading into town had become soft and gave way easily to the weight of his boots. Each step was accompanied by thick suction, the sound of mud clinging to his boots. The trip took twice as long as usual, but he finally made it.

The streets, once lined with townspeople, were empty save for the occasional car making its way down the road. He would have thought it was deserted were it not for the string of bright lights across the rooftops. In the rain they looked disconnected, like floating orbs of light, fire without a source, and he found himself mesmerized by the sight momentarily.

He took refuge from the rain in the overhang of a nearby building and called a cab with his PHS. As the cab approached, he could hear the muted sound of tires kicking up water. Then it stopped. He walked over to the side and entered the cab. It was silent for a moment, and he could hear himself breathing, fast and hard.

Looking straight ahead, the cab driver asked, "Where to?" His voice was thick with a foreign accent, his tongue stumbling over the hard consonants.

"I want to go to Vagabond Inn."

The cab driver propped his elbow on the seat and turned around, glaring. "Wait, did you say you Vagabond Inn? You've heard the news haven't you?"

Johnny could feel his heart beat even faster, the steady thump turning into an irregular frenzy, almost painful. "Why, what happened?"

The cab driver took an unusual delight in hashing out the details, relishing in the macabre. "There was a murder there. They don't know the killer yet, but they say that the man was beheaded. Man, what a way to go."

His voice firm, certain, Ashwin said, "Just turn around and do your job."

"Alright," the driver replied with a sarcastic drawl, "just trying to help you out."

"Just drive," Johnny said, trying to contain his anger.

Putting the car into gear, the driver mumbled something quietly under his breath. Then they were off, the world a wet blur as they sped past. Minutes moved by in silence, one man lazily focused on the road before him while the other man preoccupied himself with the myriad possibilities of what might lie ahead.

As they approached the specified motel, several dark figures came into view, muted shades of ShinRa blue. The various forms fused into an amorphous being, a single dark figure musing as one upon something inscrutable. Johnny watched the scene in horror, his eyelids peeled back so far his eyes seemed a little protuberant. 'Oh gods no!' he thought to himself. 'Oh gods no! It can't be!'

Taking note of Johnny's reaction, the cab driver said, "I tried to tell you."

"Stop," Johnny ordered. The car stopped on command, its wheels coming to a halt in a jerk of deceleration. Johnny flung the door open and jumped out, his feet barely making contact with the ground as he hurried toward the grisly scene.

"Hey, where's my money!" the cab driver shouted, leaning his body half out of the window.

The ShinRa grunt stopped mid-stride and took off running back towards the cab. Pulling his wallet out in a fumbling motion, he grabbed a handful of bills and stuffed them into the cabby's hand. "Keep the change." The cabby sped away from the scene without looking back.

As Johnny rounded the hill, the large nebulous figure dissolved into a myriad of individuals, ShinRa personnel of all ranks. He saw them now, his colleagues and superiors all gathered round a black tarp strewn over metal stakes shoved in the ground. Some were taking pictures, others were gathering evidence, and then there were those that appeared to be just standing around. He pushed his way past the idle observers, and found the people that looked like they were responsible for the investigation.

"Sir, what happened?"

"Looks like we got a murder here," the man said grimly.

Johnny's heart sank. He had not allowed himself to believe it until this very moment, until someone had uttered the actual words. Unbidden tears collected at the rim of his eyes, but they did not fall, not yet, not when he was surrounded by all of these people.

Taking notice of Johnny's reaction, the officer asked, "Was he a friend of yours?"

"I think so. . . I mean, if the person under that tarp is the one I'm thinking of then yes, he was a friend."

The officer looked towards the tarp and then back at Johnny in a slow, fluid motion. "Do you think you might be able to identify him?"

Johnny looked up at the officer, meeting his gaze, looking into his eyes for the first time. "Yes."

"Alright, but I have to warn you, it's a gruesome sight."

The other nodded and followed the officer under the tarp. On the ground was the body of a man, stiff with rigor mortis, a rifle still clutched firmly in his deathly- pale hands.

Looking over the body, the officer said, "Poor bastard must have died trying to defend himself."

Johnny only heard words. It was as if the other man was speaking a foreign language, and there was no meaning at all to him, just a garbled set of sounds. He was too focused on the body, the stiff boots pointing up towards the sky, the face. . .

A shocking realization came to him. The face wasn't there, just the bloody stump of a neck. With a voice barely above a whisper, Johnny uttered, "Oh gods." He scanned the ground for the remains of the body. In retrospect, he wished he would have seized this moment to turn and run away.

He found the truth staring back at him. The severed head lay a few feet from the rest of the body, ragged edges of skin delineating the border, cold eyes glazed over in death, and a mouth twisted into a scream. Johnny visually connected the head to the body and realized with sudden certainty that it was his friend, Ashwin. It could be no other.

His stomach started to churn, the disgust bubbling up, and he could feel the violent heat making its way up through his throat. He bent over as it came out. He wiped his mouth on his sleeve and turned away from the body. To stare at it any longer would induce more episodes of vomiting and sickness. This time Johnny walked out and the officer followed a few steps behind.

After taking a few heavy breaths, Johnny spoke. "Yeah, that's Ashwin."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Tseng arrived on site hours after the incident. There was only so fast a helicopter could fly, about three hundred miles per hour. Anything greater than that and the aircraft might crash. He jumped out of the helicopter as it touched ground. No need to waste an extra few minutes waiting for it to properly land.

What awaited him were masses upon masses of ShinRa personnel. "Talk about overkill," he snorted. It was just like ShinRa to pour another pail of gasoline on a body that's already burning nicely. With grim certainty, he realized he had seen it all before, hundreds of men sent on a mission that could be accomplished with only a few. It shouldn't have surprised him; not much did anymore.

As he made his way over to the corpse, the Infantrymen moved out of his way, soundlessly. There was already a group of men, high ranking officers of the ShinRa miltary, surrounding the black tarp shanty.

He ducked under the warning tape and sidled up next to a man that was writing something down. Chances that he knew something of importance were good, at least better than the others. "What happened here?" Tseng asked.

Too busy to look up, the officer replied, "Looks like we got evidence of a homicide here."

"Mind if I take a look?"

"Sorry, that area is off limits." The officer could feel Tseng's heated glare upon him, burning into the back of his shoulders. He glanced up from his paper, and then stumbled back in surprise. "Sir! I didn't realize it was you. My deepest apologies."

Tseng spoke, cold, emotionless. "No problem." He parted the loose flaps of the tarp and entered the structure to find a decapitated corpse. Not something he saw every day. In his line of work, gunshot wounds seemed to be the rule and not the exception, but he could work with this.

He slipped on some gloves, stepped over the puddle of vomit, and examined the body. It appeared to be a clean line of decapitation, void of a plethora of hack marks. 'Whoever killed this man did it in a single blow with either a sword or an axe,' he mused. 'No normal person would have that kind of strength.' He scoured the area for additional signs of the killer. Before leaving he took one last look at the body. The man must have died quickly. Being caught on the other end of this sword wasn't the worst death imaginable.

Heads turned as he emerged from the enclosure, but he ignored them for he had his mind on more important matters. The murder happened only yards away from the motel. Someone must have seen something.

He made his way down towards the motel, a series of connected rooms in the shape of a long rectangle, curved up into an angular semi-circle. Several of them were lit up, which meant those people were awake, at least awake enough to answer some questions. Starting at the end and going through them systematically seemed like the most efficient way of doing things, so he walked over to the room at the end and knocked on the door.

After a brief period of silence he knocked again. There was a hushed sound of footsteps scuffling across the floor, followed by the click of the door-handle. The door opened infinitesimally, and a pair of aged eyes peered out at him, squinting in suspicion.

"Who are you?" she asked.

"I'm from ShinRa." He said it with a certain finality, as if that was all she needed to know. His ID badge stood proudly fastened to his left coat pocket, confirmation of the fact.

Seconds later, she went to slam the door shut, but Tseng had already wedged his foot in the small opening. He winced in pain, briefly.

The voice was distant now, and had a panicked quality to it. "Go away! We didn't do anything wrong."

He remained calm, his voice betraying none of his frustration. "No one is accusing you of anything. I'm just here to ask a couple of questions. We'd like to catch the killer."

A few seconds later she was back at the door, lips quivering and hands shaking. She stood before him now, looking all of her seventy years of age: gray hair pulled back into a tight bun, wrinkles worn into her face, and a slight stoop in her upper back. Scaring old people wasn't in his job description, but he'd do whatever it took to get the job done.

In the same voice as before, he said, "Earlier today there was a murder. Did you see what happened?"

She sunk back into herself, becoming even smaller and more shriveled, like a plant in the vicious heat, the vicious sun, as if recollection of the event actually burned. Her voice came out near a faint whisper. "I heard some gunshots and screaming so I went outside to see what all the commotion was about. I saw a tall man, with a sword about as large as he, with black spiky hair, and glowing blue eyes." Then she looked at Tseng, her eyes coming alive for the first time as she spoke. "Those were not the eyes of any normal creature. They burned like fire, a demon's hellfire."

Tseng looked away, trying to appear unaffected by it all. "I see, so what happened after that?"

"Well," she looked down at her hands, playing with the belt of her oversized bathrobe. "He looked at us real mean, like he was going to come after us or something. I made my way back as quickly as I could. You see I have arthritis and I'm not able to run."

Trying to speed up the investigation, he prompted her, "And after that?"

She sighed, "After that, I stayed in my room, and watched out my window."

"There's more than one window in this room. Which one was it?"

Quietly, she turned and pointed towards the window at the back of the room. Tseng opened up the door to get a better view. Then he spoke, "Did you see which way he went exactly?"

Her arm fell to her side, hanging limp as she pondered his question. "He went towards those trees out yonder."

Without asking, he invited himself inside and walked towards the specified window. The small elderly lady hobbled after him. Peering out through the window, he said, "There are quite a few trees out there. Can you be any more specific?"

She stood a little behind him. "It was raining really hard so I couldn't see really well." Tseng threw her an intimidating glare, and she continued, "Well, can you see that really tall tree out there? You know, the one that stands above the others. I think it was a little to the right of that."

Slowly, she turned to face him, waiting for what was to happen next. As if on cue, Tseng parted his coat in a seemingly innocuous gesture, revealing a gun fastened at his waist. Her reaction came as expected, a small gasp, and eyes widened in fear. "I'd appreciate it if you kept this information just between you and me."

With eyes trained onto the gun, she gave a small nod of the head, imperceptible if one wasn't looking for it.

"Good, looks like we have a deal," he said with a small hint of satisfaction. He turned on his heels and left, without looking back, and closed the door behind him, not soft, but not hard either.

There were more people that needed to be seen. How reliable could an old woman's testimony be when life and death decisions depended upon it? Not reliable enough, so he made his way through the next couple of rooms, interviewing people, and soon a clearer picture started to emerge. Two men in SOLDIER uniforms, accompanied by a young girl, headed off into the forest, to the east of the motel.

The only part of the puzzle missing was the identity of the specimens, though it wasn't missing so much as being an ill-formed fitting piece. He was all but certain that Zack was one of those two men, one of the specimens that escaped from Nibelheim, but some of the other details didn't make sense. He still didn't know much about the girl accompanying them, or the identity of the second specimen. Not one of the people he interviewed had gotten a good look at the other man, but most agreed he looked ill.

One of the people he had interviewed had informed him of the room at which the specimens had been staying in, room no 52. Perhaps an examination of Zack's room might provide more clues. Before he picked up the key, he decided to walk by and see if it was unlocked. There was no need to make trouble that wasn't necessary in the first place.

Upon encountering the room, he found the door slightly ajar, as if someone left in a hurry. As he entered, he was assaulted with a sharp chemical smell, the essence of mako. A wave of nausea swept through him, and he leaned onto the wall for support. Even after all of these years, the smell was as repulsive as ever. Reaching for a nearby towel, he dabbed the sweat off of his forehead. 'They must be damn near saturated with mako,' he mused, 'to the point that it's leaking out their pores.' Then he chuckled, dark, sarcastic, 'I'd hate to be the cleaning maid for this room.'

After opening up the windows in the room for ventilation, he put on his gloves and began to investigate, starting with the beds. Rumpled blankets, pillows haphazardly arranged, but nothing unusual. He bent down to get a closer look. A thorough search revealed a few long black hairs and a couple of blonde ones, which he placed into a sterile plastic bag. On the other bed were a few long brown hairs, which were probably from the girl he was traveling with. He got out another plastic bag to collect those as well. One could never be too careful during an investigation. He'd have the hair samples tested for DNA later, but he had more than enough evidence that Zack was here.

He scoured the rest of the room, but there were nothing left behind, at least nothing that would be of any use. Zack was smart, even the trash cans and closets had been emptied. He must have known someone might come and search for signs of inhabitance.

His job here was done. He just needed to call in and report his findings. He pulled out his phone and dialed the number of the officer in charge of the search effort. "Hi, it's Tseng here. I'm at the Vagabond Inn in Fairton." One of his hands reached down into his pocket and found the letter. Without thinking, he wrapped his hand around it. "The specimens are headed north of this motel." He paused before speaking once more. "Yes, I'm certain." Then he hung up the phone and walked out of the room.

Outside, the rain was still falling, a thick blanket of mist hung in the sky. Tseng looked off to the east, the direction Zack was purported to have taken. "Good luck Zack, you have some more time now. Use it wisely."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Author's Note: **So I took this chapter down for a bit because I was embarrassed by all of the mistakes. It's back up now so I hope it sounds a little better :)

Believe it or not, this chapter was difficult to write. I'm not well accustomed to Tseng and so it was hard to write him. I want to thank all those that helped, most of all, **Goopy Sentimentalist** and **Blue Jae** for their extensive Turk knowledge, and the lovely **Cookiecat** for her extensive knowledge of just about everything XD I also wanted to thank **Armae**, **Demonegg**, and **Heather **for their help as well. Thanks girls! *Hugs*

Yes, I do realize there was a lack of Cloud in this chapter. . . The story seemed to mandate some Tseng involvement though. He's sort of a big deal in this whole thing with Zack. He's also a main character in Crisis Core. There will be a flashback of Cloud and Zack sometime soon :) Not sure if it will be the next chapter or not. Those sorts of things seem to work out while I'm writing. Thanks again for the reviews! I really appreciate them ^_^ Reviews make me a happy bunneh! Also, I'm not sure if the story is still interesting, so if you're still reading, and you don't like something it would be helpful to know. Thanks!


	23. Chapter 23

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 23**

_**Beta Readers: Cookiecat, Blue Jae, and Demonegg**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

As morning dawned, a thick mist rolled down from the hills, covering the forest like a burial shroud. The lingering moisture was so thick they could barely breathe. Visibility was now next to none, so Zack listened attentively to their surroundings. It was quiet now, deathly silent save for the snap of twigs under their feet and the occasional moan from Cloud.

There had been no signs of ShinRa yet, but he knew they couldn't be far behind. Any minute now and hoards of ShinRa grunts were going to ambush them, springing out of the bushes and running down the hills. But the attack never came, and the anticipation of their eminent doom had Zack on edge. It didn't help that they hadn't eaten or taken a break since they left the motel many hours ago, and the effects of exhaustion were wearing them down.

Just then, without warning, Cloud's grip on Zack loosened. His knees buckled, and he came crashing down. Quick on his feet, Zack managed to prevent his friend from doing a face-plant into the ground. After re-positioning himself, he grabbed Cloud and carried him over to a tree. The ground everywhere was soft, so Zack struggled in propping him up.

Crouching back on his heels, Zack brushed the wet strands of hair out of Cloud's face. His cheeks were stained a sickly pink, and beads of sweat delineated the outline of his face. Lilleas walked over to Cloud and kneeled down hesitantly. Looking toward Zack, she asked, "Is he going to be alright?"

Placing the back of his palm against Cloud's forehead, he could feel the heat against his hand. With a sharp indrawn breath, he spoke, "Yeah, he's made it through worse than this, but we need to cool him down." He looked around for something they could use. Most of their possessions were still sopping wet, but they were too bulky to use as a cold compress.

"How about the wet blanket we've been carrying around?" Lilleas said pointedly.

Zack was already up and retrieving the blanket as she spoke. It proved to be a bit wieldy as he folded the thick material over itself, but he managed to get it in the shape of a haphazardly arranged rectangle. After laying Cloud down, he placed it on Cloud's forehead and said softly, "This should make you feel better."

Cloud didn't even flinch. Instead he remained still, almost too still. It made Zack fear that Cloud might have lost control of himself once again. He lifted Cloud's eyelids and was relieved to find that his pupils were round and reactive to light.

"Why are you checking his eyes?" Lilleas asked.

Zack paused for a moment, contemplating. "Just making sure everything's okay."

"Oh. . ." Her voice trailed off. There was more to it then he was letting on, but she knew that he didn't want to, or couldn't explain. "Do you think we'll be safe here?"

Zack looked up at the forest around them. The mist was still thick, and he could only see a few feet in front of him. It worked to both their advantage and Shinra's as well. "For now this will do, but we can't stay here for more than a few minutes." There was always the possibility Cloud might not be able to go one, but he wouldn't think about that, not yet.

Lilleas nodded in understanding, and they turned their attention back to the ailing man beside them.

Zack reached down, grabbed Cloud's limp hand, and held onto it tightly. For all of his best intentions, he couldn't save Cloud from himself, or from the demons within.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_The moon crept into the sky. Haunting the horizon, pale as snow, her glow illuminated the night, while the stars lingered in her shadow._

_Cloud awoke to find himself trapped under Zack's arm. He looked up at the sky for a moment, before summoning the strength to wrest himself from Zack's vice-like grip. "Damn it Zack, I'm not your teddy bear, or your girlfriend." Glancing over at his sleeping friend, he thought, 'Must have rolled over in his sleep or something.'_

_Cloud gazed at the sky. The constellations manifested as figures in the night, sparkling like diamonds on black silk, gallivanting about while those on Gaia marveled at their presence. There was the hero Orion, most brilliant of the night, stretching his arms out over a vast expanse of sky, fighting the snorting charge of Taurus the bull. Cloud wished that he could be a hero, if not for himself then for a certain girl. _

_He looked over at Zack and realized with fatalistic certainty he would never make it into SOLDIER. Zack was everything he wasn't, strong, charismatic, and brave. _

_Startling him out of his thoughts was a voice that sounded throughout the forest, as if it was coming from everywhere at once. It was both strong and feminine, and the familiarity of it struck him hard. _

_Piercing through the silence, the voice came again. "Cloud!" _

_Scanning the forest, he saw a lone figure emerge, slender hips clad in a short skirt, ample breasts held in place by a vest, and a cowboy hat and boots to tie it all together. The name was already on his lips before he spoke, "Tifa."_

"_It's been a while Cloud," she said, a shy smile on her lips. She stepped towards him, and Cloud gulped hard. _

_His voice cracked as he uttered her name once more, "Tifa." The color had drained out of his face and he stood staring at her, unblinking, in disbelief. _

_Sweetly, she asked, "Are you okay? You look like you've seen a ghost or something." _

"_I'm just surprised that you're here. I thought you were. . ."_

"_Gone?" Taking another step forward, she grabbed Cloud's hands and intertwined her fingers with his. _

_Startled, he gasped. Seconds passed before his eyes found her once more, and before he knew it, he was losing himself in her essence. She was warm and sweet, reminiscent of his mother's warm apple pies, something he had waited all day to taste, but he dared not for he feared it was too good to be real. In the end, it was never as he imagined, but that didn't stop the want of it and he wanted her now more than anything. _

_The wait had been many years now, and his hunger for her burned with a primal ferocity. He longed to taste her smooth creamy skin, run his hand along her curves, and touch her sensitive skin. She was here and they were now, and this moment felt real, but something in his gut felt so wrong. When had Tifa ever held his hand? _

_He didn't want to ruin the moment for perhaps a moment was all they had, so he hushed the nagging voice of logic inside his head, and just let himself be. She moved closer, and he followed suit, until they were pressed up against each other, two burning hearts in the dark of the night. His hands, tremulous, slid down her waist to the small of her back. _

_With a voice barely above a whisper, he said, "Tifa, I. . ." He licked the chapped flesh of his thin lips and started over. "Tifa, I. . . "_

_Pressing a finger against his lips, she said, "It's okay Cloud. I know. I've always known." She looked up at him and smiled. His hands found the strength they were looking for and he pulled her closer. Their lips met in an awkward exchange of tongues and saliva._

_She pulled back and laughed softly. "You're a sloppy kisser." Embarrassed, his grip on her slackened, and he looked down at his feet. This wasn't the way he had imagined it._

_Her hands slid up his chest in a soft caress, and she said, "Don't worry, I liked it. Let's do it again." _

_Now his head was swimming, and his face was red from the flush of adrenaline. His feet, firmly planted on the ground, felt like they were losing their grip on the grass beneath, and the only keeping him from floating away in a blissful reverie was his firm hold on Tifa. Pulling her closer, snug against him, he leaned in for another kiss. _

_It was the desire of youth, unfilled passion quenched by hasty, hungry kisses. All he could taste, smell, and feel was her, so he drank her in, as a man stranded in the desert, parched, would drink a glass of water. _

_Off in the distance, the lone howl of a Nibel wolf reverberated through the air, solemn, the cry of a creature searching for others of its kind. _

_They paused, momentarily, and Tifa said, "We should probably go home." _

_It took Cloud a moment to respond. The whole thing ended as mysteriously as it had started, and he was struggling to make something of it, but the intoxicating effects of love kept him from thinking clearly. He nodded. "Sure, just let me go get Zack."_

"_Oh, I was sort of thinking we could walk home alone," she said with beguiling sweetness. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she leaned in, and brushed her lips against his. She whispered, her breath gusting over him, warm and sweet, "You know, just you and me."_

_Cloud's heart hammered heavily in his chest. He turned to the side and looked over at Zack. Under the pale light of the moon, his still frame looked fragile, like a sleeping tiger, its vulnerability only apparent during intervals of rest. He couldn't leave his friend behind, not now, not like this. Gently pushing her away, he said, "Hang on, it will only take a second._

_Before she could protest, he was making his way towards Zack in bounding strides. Now in close proximity, his friend looked still, deathly still. Cloud bent over, and gave him a hard shake, "Zack, come on wake up." He didn't move. Upon closer inspection, Zack's skin and lips were tinged a __purplish-blue, the color of someone gasping for air,__ only he wasn't gasping. He wasn't even breathing. Cloud reached down to palpate the radial pulse on Zack's wrist, but there was nothing, not even a faint throb of life. _

_Cloud turned around and yelled for Tifa, but she was nowhere to be found. He'd never felt more alone before. It dawned on him with sudden certainty that no one was coming to help him. The task of saving his friend was his and his alone. _

_Memories of a CPR training class rushed to the forefront of his mind. The cool night air suddenly felt clammy as Cloud rolled up his sleeves in preparation of resuscitating his friend. Placing the heel of one hand on his friend's sternum, he interlaced the other and pressed down hard, once, twice, keeping a steady rhythm all the way up to thirty chest compressions. Then he pinched his friend's nose and blew two full breaths of air into his lungs. He felt for a pulse, as faint as it might be, but there was nothing. _

_Throwing himself into the act, he started the process once more. "Come on Zack, you can't die on me," he said in heavy, panting breaths between compressions. "You promised you wouldn't leave me, you promised, you promised, you promised. . . " His words continued, a mantra to focus his energy, as he tried to pump the life back into his friend. _

_After several rounds of agonizing labor, he eventually found a pulse, Zack's heart was beating once more. He gave his friend a shake, "Gods Zack, you're alive!"_

_A painful moan escaped from Zack's lips, and Cloud realized Zack still wasn't out of danger. He needed medical attention, but surrounding them was nothing but grass, and trees, and sky. He didn't know the way into town, but he figured if he kept walking he would run into one eventually. It was the only choice he had for survival. _

_Squatting down, Cloud positioned his friend in a manner conducive to standing up, and with Zack's arm looped around his shoulders they rose together. They lurched forward, one man supporting the weight of two, as they moved through the forest with heavy steps. _

_The once brightly lit sky started to fade, and the night grew suddenly dark. Cloud looked up to see the stars disappearing, dying orbs of light fading into the cold space around them. He pulled Zack behind a tree and watched with horror as the world imploded before his very eyes. _

_Surrounding him now was an all consuming darkness, a void that had never known light. Beneath him, he could feel Zack's huddled form, breathing, taking slow shallow breaths. He tightened his grip and spoke to him without words: "Hang on Zack, don't die on me now. I'll find help." _

_As he struggled to make sense of their current atmosphere, he saw a figure enrobed in light emerge from the darkness, apparition-like, materializing out of the air. Her blonde hair hung loosely about her small face, accentuating her blue eyes, which sparkled despite the fine wrinkles etched in her face, a part of her soul that the rough mountain life couldn't touch. He recognized her at once. His voice came out in a choked whisper, "Mom?"_

"_That's right Cloud, it's me."_

_His heart was too full for words. After setting Zack down, he turned to face her, mouth open in quiet astonishment. _

_She reached a hand out and softly cupped his cheek. "I've missed you son." _

_Leaning into her touch, he said, "I've missed you too mom."_

"_Come with me and leave your past behind. We can go back home and everything will be as it was before. Wouldn't you like that?"_

_He paused and took a step back, not even aware he had done so. "What about Zack?"_

"_What about him?" she asked, mirroring his somber sentiment. _

_With hesitation, he replied, almost as if he was embarrassed, "He's my friend. . ."_

"_Your friend is he?" She laughed, high and thin, piercing the impenetrable darkness. "Where was he when you were alone for all those years of your life? Where was he when we had to scrape by for a week on a loaf of bread? Where was he when you were up in your room crying because you were the only kid in town not invited to Tifa's eighth birthday party? Where was he when you really needed someone?"_

_Cloud opened his mouth to respond, but thought better of it and remained silent. _

"_That's right, but who was there for you?"_

"_You were mom. . ."_

_Her eyes sparkled, "Always." She stepped forward and offered an embrace. "Come here my child." He walked into her arms, docile, with the unquestioning loyalty of a child, instinct that acts, not speaks. Her voice was soft and comforting now. "You are special. I knew it from the day I first laid eyes on you. You were meant for greater things than this world can offer you. I can make you live up to your potential, make you the man you always wanted to be." She paused, the silence deafening. "Remember what it felt like to be weak? Like that time you failed to save Tifa on the bridge."_

_Something within his chest tightened, and he found it hard to breathe, as if the air had become thick and viscous, and each sucking breath took painstaking effort. He couldn't see it, but her lips curled into a smile. _

_The softness from her voice disappeared, and all that was left was a sharp accusing tone. "You trailed after her like some lovesick puppy dog with the notion of keeping her safe, but that's not what happened, is it? That bridge was rickety and old. You insisted she stay back, but she was too intent on seeing her mother to listen." Her words felt like lashings, each one coming down and tearing into scarred flesh, wounds healed over from years ago. Cloud's whole body went rigid as she continued to speak. "The plank broke right under her feet. She was left hanging over a small mountain cliff. You rushed to save her, but you weren't strong enough, were you?" _

"_No. . . " he gasped, his voice filled with the agony of a man who had spent his whole life in regret._

_As if spurned on by his torment, she spoke at faster pace. "Her little hands hanging desperately onto the edge of the plank. She cries for help, her small voice barely audible above the roaring wind, tears in her eyes as she begs for you to save her. You rush to her side."_

"_Stop it!"_

_Her verbal lashings continued, sharp and stinging, bearing down relentless and without mercy. "Without thinking, you grab onto her hands, and try to pull her up, but your measly chicken-bone arms don't have the strength. Your arms are shaking with fatigue as you desperately rack your brain for some solution to the problem."_

"_No!" His cry clung to the air, the way a dying leaf falls off a tree, a slow and sustained fall. He started to pull away, but she only held onto him tighter. _

_A moment of silence, profoundly still, before she continued, "It's too much. She eventually pulls you over and you both fall to the bottom of the cliff."_

"_NO!" Cloud twisted himself from her grasp, panting, taking in more air than he could exhale. He could see Tifa now, in the darkness, her fragile limbs splayed out in an unnatural position, and her pallid visage, so deathly pale. Then the taunting accusations that followed, and he, just a small boy of nine, had to endure the hatred of the whole town. _

_Realization struck him suddenly. He never told. He never told a single soul _

_He looked up to find her smiling, victorious, as if she had won something. Straightening up, he glared back at her. He could see her now as she really was. Despite wearing the mask of his mother, she had a look about her that was not quite human, eyes that shined too bright, and a smile painted on, doll-like, an imitation of the real thing, an attempt at being human. In a tone deathly serious, he said, "I never told anyone about that. My mother never knew."_

_Her smile spread from ear to ear. "A good mother would have known." _

"_Fuck," he growled, "You're not my mother!"_

_Ever calm, she kept her composure as she replied, "Oh Cloud, that's not a nice way to talk to your mother."_

"_What do you want from me?"_

"_What do I want from you?" She laughed, bordering on maniacal. "What I want Cloud is for you to obey me."_

_Behind his clenched fists and flared nostrils lurked a profound fear, but he wouldn't let her know. He replied, his voice stoic, "Never." _

"_We'll see about that. That's what they all say at first." __She hid a laugh behind her cool and level demeanor.__ "Don't worry, I'm patient. You see Cloud, I am older than time itself. I have existed long before this planet, and I'll exist long after it has turned to dust. I can wait it out." _

"_I'd rather die first."_

"_Have it your way. Of course, it looks like your friend over there couldn't wait."_

_Acting out of instinct, he puffed up his chest to make himself appear bigger, the same way a cat raises its fur and arches its back before a fight. "Bring Zack back."_

_With a smirk she replied, __ "Well now, you're not in the place to be making demands." _

_Anger coiled within his belly, so tense now he felt like he could burst. He pounced on her, his fists raining down only to be deflected by an invisible shield. "You stupid bitch!"_

"_You'll have to try harder than that," she said with a laugh, amused. _

_He threw his fists down. Taking a step back, he studied her expression, her face inscrutable, eyes cold and without reflection, merciless. He said nothing._

"_You know there is another way." _

"_Like I said, I'd rather die than be your slave," he spat._

"_Ha! You fool, it's not your life we're talking about here," she gestured over to Zack, "it's his."_

_Cloud looked over at his friend. In the dim light there was no shadow, just the faint outline of a still form, not yet rigid with death. Zack had sacrificed everything for him. A thick lump arose in his throat. He swallowed, but it didn't go away. He turned to face her. _

"_Okay, name your price." _

"_It's something small. You won't really miss it. Just a few memories. In fact, you won't even remember it." _

_He flinched, infinitesimally, and then met her gaze straight-on. "How do I know I can trust you?"_

"_What other choice do you have?"_

_Struggling to hide a pained grimace, he gave a sharp nod of the head. _

"_As you wish." _

_With the abruptness of a thunderclap, the silence was filled with voices, a myriad number from different periods in his life. As they grew in volume, they lost their distinction and melded into one large sound, booming, throbbing in his ears, like an ice-pick driving through his brain. Holding his ears, he dropped to his knees and screamed. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Hey Cloud!" Zack gave his friend a quick shake. "Wake up buddy, it's just a dream."

Cloud's anguished cry softened. Then he began babbling, his voice bubbling over, like a shallow brook flooded in the winter. "Zack. . . nnnn. . . don't go. . . don't. . . nnnnggggg. . . Zack."

Grabbing up Cloud's hand, Zack squeezed it firmly in affirmation of his presence. In a faint, but distinguishable gesture, Cloud responded by squeezing back. Zack smiled, ever so slight.

Sitting back on her heels, Lilleas watched the scene in quiet terror, alarm bells going off in her head, their shrill chime reverberating to the depths of her being. Seeing Cloud in the violent throes of terror always threw her off guard. Her eyes became moist, but she did not wipe them.

"Looks like his fever is gone," Zack said, feeling Cloud's forehead with the back of his palm. He glanced over at her and saw her wet pink eyes brimming with tears. His voice softened, "Hey you okay?"

"Yeah," she sniffled.

"You sure?"

She nodded fervently, and wiped her wet nose with the back of her hand.

"Alright, well then looks like we're ready to go." Zack looked around. Addressing no one in particular, he said, "I just hope no one heard us. . . "

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

On the other side of the forest the ShinRa army marched on, their dark forms rising in silhouette against the morning sun. Leading the company was the Major, while his two officers, a Lieutenant and Captain, remained close behind. The rest of the infantrymen followed along like shadows, clinging to the Major's every move. Suddenly a scream sounded, distant and barely audible above the whistling wind. The Major, head of the line, stopped. The men jolted, prodding into one another like a train of freight cars stopping.

"Queer," the Captain said, but the Major did not answer. The sound came again, a low-pitched wail that dies borning. "That sounds like a man screaming sir. It's coming from the east."

"Yes," the Major said. His word in turn hung sluggishly, and faded. Then he pulled out his map and began to pore over it.

The Major folded the map and turned abruptly towards his men. "Atte-e-e-tion!" the Major said, his voice booming. The company clashed, a single muffled sullen sound. "At ease men," he said. Standing before him were several rows of soldiers, backs rigid, eyes fixed straight ahead, and their faces still, set like stone.

He paced back and forth, his steps deliberate, mud slopping onto his shoes as he did so. Then he stopped and turned to face his Captain and Lieutenant. "We will split up the troops. Captain, you take half of them to the North, and Lieutenant you take the other half to the East. Is that understood?"

"Sir, yes sir!" they said in unison, saluting him.

"Alright then. See that it gets done," the Major ordered.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Tseng stood before the large brass doors of the church, their rusty handles a gateway to another world, a place where the sanctity of life still existed, as if goodness had found the one place in the world where it could rest in peace. He pulled out a handkerchief and dabbed at his sweaty forehead with clumsy grace. He tucked it into his back pocket with a sigh. He paused before entering. The doors moaned in protest as he made his way into the building. He was not welcome here.

Aerith was hunched over the flowerbed, her back toward him. As he approached her, the wooden planks creaked underneath the hard sole of his shoes. He kept a respectful distance from her. She did not turn to face him. Either she was lost in another world, or she did not care to see him. He knew it was the latter.

His voice came out a dry whisper, "Hello."

She continued to water the flowers in silence until she was finished. Then she brushed the dirt off her hands and turned to face him. "Hi," she replied, averting his gaze.

They stood there for a few seconds, heads bowed in silence. This dance, this routine, they had performed it many times before, with cold precision, always. Aerith was usually the one to break the silence. Tseng was not a man of many words, and even less when he was nervous. "I have something for you," she said, her voice sounding hesitant.

He followed her with his eyes as she walked over to the pew to pick up a letter. Inwardly he cringed. She came back and handed it to him, her eyes hopeful, and her smile genuine. "Could you deliver this to Zack?"

"Of course." He accepted the envelope as though it were an important mission. On closer examination, he saw little pink and yellow flowers decorating the edges of the envelope, like something out of a romance movie. '_Damn,_' he thought to himself, struggling to hide a grimace.

"So any word on Zack?" Aerith asked.

"No."

Her voice hardened, almost accusing, "No, you can't tell me or no, you don't know?"

After a pause he replied, "Both. . . "

She glared at him. "What do you know?"

"Aerith," he sighed, "you know that's confidential information."

She stood thin and taught, her hands clenched at her side. A few moments passed before he found himself walking towards her, his footsteps slow and soft, the way one would approach a frightened animal. She looked at him briefly. Gone from her face was the exuberance that lit the world aglow, and in its place were deep-sunken eyes ringed by shadows. He reached out a hand and touched her shoulder, gently. "Aerith, I'm sorry."

"I want you to leave," she said, her voice shaking.

A solemn nod and he withdrew his hand. There were things in this world that he didn't understand, that no man could understand. He walked away, his steps echoing throughout the empty corridor. As he shut the heavy church doors, he could hear the faint sound of sobbing. Part of him wanted to slap some sense into her and the other part wanted to. . .

"Damn. . . " he cried in frustration, slamming his fist into the church wall.

Stunned by his own reaction, he stood staring at the outside of the rotting church, a distinct mark where his fist had met the wall. The sobbing stopped momentarily, and it was silent save for the distant laughter of children playing on the playground. Shaking himself out of a daze, he descended the lonely steps. From inside the church, he could hear her crying once more, the echo following him all the way home.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

With shaky hands, Johnny held the letter of his late friend, Ashwin, in front of him. "To be delivered to my wife, upon my untimely death." The scrawled letters in dark ink were barely legible, as if he had penned them in haste, had known that his time was limited.

Johnny had seen his friend write the letter only a month earlier. Shaken by a dream of the world ending, he had penned the note to his wife before leaving on a mission, ironically, the same mission that would end up taking his life. Johnny had teased him about it then, but he wasn't laughing now. No one was laughing, except for fate.

He'd just gotten into Midgar a few hours ago. If he didn't do this now, he might lose his nerve and never be able to do it. Aswhin's family lived on the outskirts of Midgar. ShinRa didn't pay its infantrymen nearly enough money to live on the Upper Plate. Red and bleary-eyed, he mounted the steps to her house. A quaint canary-yellow house, which would have looked pleasant, almost cheery, on any other day, but now it appeared old and sickly, like an elderly person afflicted with jaundice.

He raised his hand to ring the doorbell, but pulled it back at the last second. A moment of indecision progressed into agonizing doubt. 'Get ahold of yourself Johnny, you can do this, no, _need, _to do this for Ashwin,' he thought to himself.

His hand shot straight out, as if acting of its own accord, and connected with the buzzer. Seconds later he heard the sound of soft padded footsteps, bare feet on carpet.

The door opened, and he was greeted by two friendly faces, Ashwin's wife and her baby. "Hey Johnny," she said, smiling, her face pleasant, "what are you doing here? I thought you were on a mission with Ashwin."

He did not look at her, nor did he look away. Out of the corner of his vision, he could see her gaze fixed on the stark white envelope in his trembling hands. "I'm afraid I have some bad news for you. Aswhin—he—he- died in the line of duty." He heard her gasp, but he did not stop talking, "He wanted me to give this to you." Johnny offered up the letter, but she did not take it, as if accepting it meant her husband had really died. He pushed the letter into her hands, "Ashwin would want you to have this."

Clutching the token of love to her chest, she let out a low wail, which dissolved into child-like sobs. Then the baby started crying, and before long he could not distinguish between the two, it was just one long agonizing sound. A single tear rolled down his cheek. It was all he would allow himself at the moment. He wrapped his arms around the melancholic pair and embraced them tenderly.

In a soothing voice, he tried to calm her, but his words were only false promises. Nothing would ever be okay again. Johnny would not rest until he found the man, no, _monster, _that killed his friend. The specimen would get nothing less than what he deserved, death.

Johnny looked up to the grey sky and grimaced. "I'll kill you—you—you—bastard!" His cry was barely audible over the sobbing in the background, the sound of a heart breaking.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**A/N: **I've been really busy lately. Lol, I'm optimistic that someday I'll be able to say I'm doing okay :P Anyway, this story is never far from my heart so I write whenever I have the chance ;) I had lots of help on this chapter. As always, a big thanks to the girls who devoted their time to beta reading, **Cookiecat, Blue Jae, and Demonegg. **Also, a many thanks to **Goopy Sentimentalist **who also helped me a great deal with this chapter and **Armae,** who was there to remind me I don't suck :P *Hugs* you all! I enlisted **Demonegg's** help for this chapter because she's an expert at Cloud's characterization and there was a lot of Cloud in here. Actually she's my favorite Cloti/Cloud writer :D She brings such life to his character. She was also the one that recommended, "The Road," to me. One of my favorite books ever!

Thank you everyone for the reviews! I greatly appreciate them :D Also, thanks also to those who answered the poll. I'm going to continue this story for now. I had my doubts after the last chapter, but I think I'll keep going ^_~ It really would have been easier to start another story from scratch, but I'll stick with this one.

So it's up to the reader to decide whether Cloud was having a dream, or that stuff with Jenova was really happening inside of his head. In any case, Jenova is a shape shifter. That's how she decimated the Cetra. She lured people by disguising herself as the victim's loved ones. Who better for her to imitate then both Tifa and Cloud's mom ;) I got the idea for it from Jaydee Grey's story, "Reduced to Specimens." I was thinking you might enjoy the Jenova dream **weirdsquirrelgirl ^_~**

Awwww! Poor Aerith misses her Zack :( Tseng isn't a good substitute.

Johnny is actually in the game, so he's not technically an OC. What do I mean by that? Well, you'll have to keep reading to find out :P I got kind of attached to Aswhin. . .


	24. Chapter 24

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 24**

_**Beta Reader: Cookiecat**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

The sunlight filtered down through the nebulous mass of grey clouds, creating pockets of light on the ground, illuminating their path through the forest. Zack and Lilleas half-carried, and half-drug Cloud between them. As they weaved through the trees and underbrush, Cloud stumbled his aimless legs along, his head lolling, and sweat dripping down his mud-encrusted face.

Months before the forest was teeming with life, but after the winter chill the trees were sparse, their naked limbs on display like an eccentric skeletal structure. Weeds thrust up stubbornly through the cold hard ground, sapping nutrients from the already depleted soil.

A refreshing breeze blew through the trees, cooling their clammy skin, but still Cloud struggled with every step. Zack had taken notice of his friend's rapidly deteriorating condition, but at the moment, there wasn't much he could do. Somewhere in the depths of the forest, the enemy lurked in unseen shadows. If they held this pace, Zack knew they wouldn't make it out of the forest alive.

In the distance, there was a small clearing with a shallow river running the length of it. He was thirsty, a thin film of dried saliva coating the roof of his mouth . "C'mon, I think we should take a break." Lilleas followed without question. They made their way over and flopped down by the muddy bank. The water was murky, but they drank of it anyway, quenching the ache in their parched throats. Then Zack pulled out an empty water bottle and filled it. He sat Cloud upright and squirted the water into his mouth until it dribbled down his chin. Zack returned to the river, grabbed a handful of water, and splashed it on his face, washing away the grime and sweat.

He was able to think clearly for the first time this morning. A quick succession of thoughts flitted through his mind, only a few of them practical solutions. Their options at this point were limited. 'We will hide,' he thought, 'yes, that is what we must do.'

Zack looked over at Lilleas who was currently washing the dirt off of Cloud. That gave him an idea. "Lilleas, stop!" he said with haste.

She looked up, half-expecting ShinRa guards to be surrounding them. When she saw it was only Zack, she gave a sigh of relief. "Don't scare me like that."

"Sorry," he said with indifference, his mind occupied with other thoughts. "Here's the plan. We're going to hide in a bush."

She responded, "Don't you think they could still see us?"

"Maybe. . . " He looked around at the forest, leaves and twigs scattered on the ground, dull rocks by the side of the river, and wet dirt surrounding them. "How about we cover ourselves with mud?"

She grimaced, making no sign to hide it. "You think that would really work?"

"Well, it might not be the best solution, but right now it's the only one we've got. This riverbank has plenty of mud so we're going to have to do it here." Without another word, he unfastened his suspenders and started removing his shirt.

She stared at him in dismay, eyes wide and unblinking, her hand clasped over her heart, as if she was afraid it was going to fly out of her chest. While taking off his pants, he noticed that she was watching him, horrified. In his haste Zack had temporarily forgotten about Lilleas. With one leg out of his pants, he stopped momentarily and looked up at her. "Oh. . . I suppose you have on underthings, right?"

She nodded meekly.

"Hang on, let me finish what I was doing here and then I'll see if I can't find something to use as a cover-up." Standing unabashed in his boxers, he made his way over to their luggage and dug out the still-moist blanket. He shook out the dirt and presented it to her, all but pushing it into her limp hands.

Then he turned his back to her and walked to Cloud's side. "Guess you're not going to undress yourself, eh buddy?" He didn't wait for a response, but none was given. Buckles were undone rapidly, a tinkling cacophony of metal, and then his shirt was yanked off over his head. Zack removed his boots and then his pants, which he managed to pull off despite Cloud's resistance.

Standing in the same spot as before, Lilleas clutched the blanket to her chest, as if it were a prized possession she could not bear to lose. Her eyes were glazed over, looking at something but focused on nothing in particular. "Lilleas?" Zack asked, bringing her to attention.

She looked directly into his eyes. "I don't want Cloud to see!" she bit out, flush with embarrassment at her sudden outburst.

The situation called for some light-hearted laughter, but Zack was not in the mood. Instead, he picked up Cloud in resignation and walked a few feet in the other direction. "Okay, go ahead, we're not looking."

"You sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure," he said, exasperated.

Zack paused for a moment and listened to his surroundings. The most prominent sound was the flowing water of the spring rushing past. He tuned that out and kept listening. The air was calm, still frigid with the remnants of winter. Somewhere a bird was calling, a broken melody that spoke of his journey south for winter and his early return for spring.

Zack directed his attention elsewhere. Still no sound of ShinRa. Breaking him out of his thoughts, Lilleas spoke, "I'm done."

Zack gave a nod in her direction before picking up Cloud and returning to the muddy bank of the river. "Alright, now it's time for a mud bath."

"You're really serious about this, aren't you?"

Digging his hands into the wet earth, he picked up a handful and slathered the viscous substance onto his chest. "Does it look like I'm joking."

"No."

"Alright then, I'll show you how it's done. Just grab a handful like this," he paused, a heaping pile of mud in his hand, and waited until she did the same. "Yeah," he said, almost relishing in her disgust. "Now here comes the fun part." He slapped it onto his right shoulder and spread it down the length of his arm. "See it's that easy. Now you try."

She eyed the contents of her hand with suspicion before she brought it close to her body. A grimace preceded the application of the mud on her right arm.

Zack laughed lightly, "Oh come on, it's not that bad."

"Yes it is. . . "

"Well, we don't really have another choice at the moment," he said with a sigh. Zack looked over at his friend, curled up with his head tucked into his arms, shielding what he could from the scathing wind. His heart sank. Cloud would be as fond of the mud as a cat was of water. Better to just get it done and over with. "Hey Lilleas, why don't we start with Cloud first, and then maybe you won't think it's so awful."

Her frown melted into a small smile. Starting with his legs, she applied the cold mud even more gingerly then she would have done on herself. She was surprised by his lack of reaction, not even as much as a flinch, so she continued coating him with it.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_It had started, the filling of the mako tank. He could feel the cold and slimy substance creeping up his legs and seeping into his pores. It felt like hundreds of spiny legged spiders crawling under his skin. The sensation was unbearable. Rising higher, the mako was already up to his knees_. Runrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrun! RUN! _But he couldn't move. He knew this before he even tried. His muscles were slack from disuse, but it was more than that. Perhaps they had paralyzed him. He attempted to flex his hands. Nothing. Damn! _

"_Cloud!" The voice was distant, detached in a way, as if the person was not here despite the presence of their voice. "Cloud!" Again that voice, vaguely familiar, but so far away, like an echo off the top of a mountain, and him standing at the bottom unable to climb up and reach the other side. The dark-haired angel of mercy couldn't save him this time, couldn't save him from the avalanche of green that was threatening to bury him alive. _

_The mako was up to his chest now, and his heart was pounding ferociously against his ribcage. He looked out and saw a bespectacled man smiling and knew at once he was bad. Those all-encompassing eyes held him as he burned alive in mako. All he could do was pray that he passed out quickly. _Oh Gods let me die!

_Invading his nostrils, the mako choked out his air supply, and he coughed and gagged on it. His lungs felt like bursting as he was drowning and drowning and drowning in green._ . . .

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Zack gave his friend a playful tousle of the hair. "Hey good job buddy, you didn't even complain."

Lilleas stood back and admired her handiwork. In his new suit of mud Cloud blended into the background, save his bright golden hair. "What do we do about his hair?" she inquired.

"Hmmm, I hadn't thought about that. It is really bright."

"And spiky," Lilleas added.

With a sigh Zack said, "Well, I hate to say it, but we're going to have to cover that up as well." Picking up a thick gob of mud, he spread it onto Cloud's hair, distinctly avoiding the bandaged area.

"He doesn't really look like Cloud anymore. . ." she said, her voice carried off by the wind.

"Heh, well that's the point right?" Directing his attention at Cloud, he said, "Don't worry Spike, after we wash you up you'll be good as. . . " He paused, looking down to obscure his blaring thoughts, so loud inside his head he was sure Lilleas could hear, 'Good as a comatose person will ever be? Come on Zack, you can't start thinking like that.' He glanced up to find Lilleas staring at him, catching him in a moment of weakness. Collecting the thick saliva from the back of his throat, he leaned over and spat. "Well, let's get moving. We don't have all day," he said, slightly irritated.

She looked away. A moment of somber silence passed between them, before he spoke, "Hey, I didn't really mean it."

With her head still turned towards the ground, she replied, "I know."

Angry words would soon be forgotten. The threat of ShinRa still loomed overhead, weighing heavily upon them, so they hurried as they finished the task of camouflaging themselves with mud. Then they crammed what would fit into their backpacks and carried the rest. Lilleas helped Zack as they stood Cloud's floppy body upright. "Hang in there buddy, we just need to walk a bit more and then you can rest. How does that sound?"

Cloud let out a low whine, almost pained.

"I know it's tough," Zack said, the fire back in his voice, burning fierce, "but you have to be strong."

With jerky movements Cloud managed to lift his head up slowly and turn towards Zack. His eyes had an awful quality to them, smooth and glassy, unlike any human eyes Zack had ever seen. It reminded him of the blue marbles he used to play with as a kid, perfectly opaque spheres carved out of glass, but unlike those marbles the luster from Cloud's eyes was gone. Before Zack could make sense of it, Cloud's head returned back to its prior position, hanging limp with his chin to his chest. Perhaps Cloud had been reaching out to him. Maybe. . .

They headed back in the direction they had come from. "Keep your eyes open for a large bush," Zack said.

Lilleas nodded, and they kept walking. As time passed, the mud began to dry, pulling at their bare skin. They would not even realize this until later. For now they were too focused on finding a place to hide, catching ShinRa before they were caught themselves.

As the light of the morning dimmed, the shadows came out from hiding, covering the forest in a dark haze. Their pace quickened as they realized time was running out. In her enthusiasm to help, Lilleas was apt to point out several hiding spots, but none of them were suitable.

"There should be something around here," Zack said in frustration.

"You sure that last one wouldn't have worked?"

"Maybe. It was big enough, but the leaves were a bit sparse on that one. We'll use it if we can find anything else." Zack stopped suddenly with Cloud and Lilleas trailing after. "That's it!" Lilleas followed the direction of Zack's hand, but all she could see were trees, so she followed him blindly as he led the way. Standing a few feet from the beaten path was a shrub, a wild mass of foliage, green-leafy branches sticking out every which way, as if it couldn't decide on a direction to grow.

"That's an odd looking plant," Lilleas said with a mixture of humor and derision.

Zack smiled, more out of relief than anything else. "Well it doesn't have to win a beauty contest, just has to hide us from ShinRa." Turning to face them, he said with a fist pump, "Come on, let's do this!"

Zack was the first one in. Parting the numerous branches, he crept inside, being careful not to trip. Then it was time for Cloud. It was a joint-effort with Zack at his head and Lilleas at his feet. Zack took the brunt of Cloud's weight as he moved farther into the shrub, coming down with a hard landing as he tripped over a stem.

"You guys okay?" Lilleas called out.

"Yeah, we're fine, but I might be a bit sore tomorrow. I landed on my butt, and Cloud landed on top of me."

She was sincerely concerned. "Oh. . . Is there anything I can do?"

"Why don't you get me some ice. "

She nodded and took a few steps in the other direction before she stopped and turned around. The leaves around Zack shuddered; she could hear him laughing. "Hey, that's not funny! I was trying to help."

After trying to calm himself, he said, "I'm sorry." There was a few seconds of restrained silence before the laughter started up again.

She crept up to the plant and peered inside. In the manner of young females, she put on her best pout in an attempt to garner sympathy. "It's not funny."

"You're right. I'm sorry." Leaning over Cloud, he stuck his hand out through the bush. "Friends?"

The softness of his voice took away the little defense that she had. She couldn't see it, but she knew he was smiling. Taking his hand, she shook it. "Friends."

"Why don't you get your stuff and join us," he said, his voice suddenly serious.

"Right," she agreed. After quickly surveying the area, she picked up her belongings and climbed into the low-lying shrub.

Within the confines of the plant it was dark, the dense foliage forming a barrier against the mid-day light. Zack could feel her hands groping wildly, searching for something to hold onto. "Hey, it's okay Lilleas. I'm right here, and Cloud is here too." He took her hands and placed them on Cloud's shoulders. She squeezed him gently for reassurance before her hands fell limp at her side.

"So what do we do now?" she asked.

He replied thoughtfully, "Now we just wait."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Crammed into a small space, they huddled together for warmth, keeping as quiet as they could manage. To keep the boredom away they had turned it into a game, but the novelty of it only lasted for the first hour, and then Lilleas had fallen asleep. There was too much at stake for Zack to take a break, so he kept alert, vigilantly watching through the leafy slats.

The day had come and gone, disappearing behind the clouds. Now it was evening and all was dark. Beside him, the outline of two bodies curled together as one. It was best not to wake them lest they be traumatized by future events.

In the distance he could hear the sound of a group of animals on the prowl, their muffled footsteps quiet on the ground. A pack of wolves perhaps. The sound moved closer, and as it did so it took on a more distinct quality, leaden footsteps echoing with a thud. Creatures of the wild possessed a natural grace that men had yet to learn.

Zack's heartbeat quickened, thumping heavily against his chest. His eyes strained though the dark to catch a glimpse of these men, though there was no doubt in his heart as to their identity. As they approached he could make out their bulky forms: metal helmets, packs on their back, and boots, row after row of boots.

Without thinking, he threw an arm out over Cloud. Now they were just mere feet away, dozens of ShinRa grunts. The pace of his heart intensified, and he could hear the pounding of his pulse in his ears.

Suddenly, one of the men yelled, "What the hell is that?"

"Sir, I think it's a. . . "

His voice was cut off abruptly. Out of the quiet night an angry wind arose, stirring up the trees. The men scrambled to get away. In the midst of the dark, Zack could see what looked like a flurry of ice and rain. There were several screams, low voiced guttural wails as the men ran for their lives. A shimmering ripple of water arced through the air followed by the sound of ice shattering. Then it was quiet, deathly still, and the only thing Zack could hear was his own breathing.

The scene was reminiscent of a dream, a series of disconnected events strung together by a single thread of thought, fragile, like the silken thread of a spider's web, broken easily by a wisp of wind. Zack turned to find Lilleas crouched down, burying her head in her hands. She shook her head, her messy brown hair sticking to her back. Placing a hand on her shoulder, he gave her a reassuring squeeze, prompting her to burst into muffled sobs. A gentle smile and a pat on the back was all he could spare at the moment. Anything more might give them away. The cause of the chaos might still be out there. A creature capable of felling a small army. A summon perhaps? But someone would have had to call it. . .

His thoughts continued as night faded into day, the sun rising through the trees. Zack continued watching, his eyes dry from constant surveillance while Lilleas remained silent. She had not spoken since last night. Keeping his gaze straight ahead, Zack spoke, "I think it's okay to come out now."

"Are you sure?"

"There's only one way to find out." He turned to face her, "Why don't you stay here with Cloud while I go check it out." He shifted his weight slowly before rising out of the shrub. Immediately after taking a few steps, his muscles started cramping from disuse, and he gave out a loud grunt.

"You okay?" Lilleas asked, still behind the cover of the bush.

Straightening up, he answered back, "Yeah, I'm fine." Now, out in the open, he could see the scene in all of its horrendous glory. Dozens of corpses littered the ground, all of them tinged a cyanotic blue. He approached them cautiously. Their facial expressions were similar, a look of shock and surprise plastered onto their cold hard faces, laying in wait for something that had already come. It was as if they were still hanging onto the precipice of life and had yet to fall into the great abyss of death.

Zack scanned the area for any clues to help him identify the murderer. That's when he noticed a tree a few feet away with a note tacked onto it. Stepping over a few bodies, he made his way over to the tree and picked up the letter, beige vellum paper penned in dark ink. Zack marveled at the impeccable penmanship, smooth calligraphy strokes crafted by a steady hand. For a moment, he actually thought it was the work of a computer, but the slight unevenness of the lines gave it away.

_My friend, the fates are cruel  
There are no dreams, no honor remains  
The arrow has left the bow of the goddess_

_My soul, corrupted by vengeance  
Hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey  
In my own salvation  
And your eternal slumber_

_Legend shall speak  
Of sacrifice at world's end  
The wind sails over the water's surface  
Quietly, but surely_

_~LOVELESS, Act IV  
_

Zack crumpled the note. He wasn't aware of it, but his voice came out shaken, "Genesis. . ."

"Can I come out now?" Lilleas called from the shrub.

He turned in her direction and firmly replied, "No, why don't you and Cloud stay where you are for now." His eyes were drawn to the ground. A trail of black feathers and footprints led away from the note, continuing for about ten paces before coming to an abrupt stop. Zack looked up towards the sky, but it was as barren as the ground. Genesis was long gone by now, leaving only a cryptic message to explain his motivations.

Straightening out the paper, Zack tried to make some sense out of the poem. "Legend shall speak of sacrifice at world's end. . ." His grip tightened as he said, "Well, no one is getting sacrificed if I can help it." He folded the poem and put it in his pocket. "Heh, I guess I owe you a thanks Genesis." His voice was somber, almost melancholic.

The sun had taken its place in the bluish-grey sky. A new day was already beginning. He paused momentarily as he looked out over the mass human carnage. Once he might have felt something, but that was long ago, when dreams were bought for free. There was nothing left to do now but check the fallen men for supplies.

In the distance, he could hear the sound of leaves rustling. He looked towards the sound and found Lilleas pulling Cloud out of the bush.

Upon realizing she had been spotted, she stopped and looked up. "Cloud said he wanted to get out and stretch."

A slight smile crossed his face. "He said that, did he?" She nodded. "Well, it looks safe for now. Stay there until I come get you. I'm just going to check these guys and see if they have anything useful on hand."

As he went about searching their bags, he tried to ignore the gruesome faces of death staring back at him, empty eyes searching for a reason why. He had no answer to give, so he went about his business as quickly as possible. That was until he met the gaze of one corpse and found himself unable to look away. Those brown eyes seemed to reach out and grab his attention, leading him to the floodgates of time, behind which was a reservoir of illicit memories, bursting forth against the weakened gate and flooding his mind with past remembrances.

He knew this man, knew him before he could even remember the name. The features were unmistakable, large brown eyes, a nose much too small for a heavy-set face, and thin lips that seemed to sneer even in death . It was Aden. Suddenly, Zack went limp and dropped to his knees. In the background he could hear someone calling his name, but it barely registered.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_Zack flipped through the pages of his planner and opened it up to the calendar section. Tomorrow it read: _

*Training with Kunsel

*Guest teach Cloud's class

*Dinner Date with Aerith at 7pm (Don't be late, she hates that!)

_Tomorrow was going to be great, a night out on the town with his girl and teaching the Infantrymen. Not only would he have the undivided attention of a class full of starry-eyed recruits, but he'd be able to see how his lil' buddy was progressing. _

_He'd never admit it, but he was actually fond of teaching opportunities. It had garnered a negative reputation with SOLDIER's because they had more important things to do than waste their time on something as insignificant as teaching Infantrymen, but it was something they were required to do by contract. _

_Before going to bed, he sent Cloud a text message on his phone, "See ya tomorrow. Lunch afterwards? My treat :)"_

_He received a reply about five minutes later, "Sure, thanks Zack!" _

_Zack went to bed with a smile on his face. Yep, life was great. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_As always, morning came about three hours too early. Zack hit the snooze button on his alarm a few times before getting up and getting into the shower. _

_His training with Kunsel went as expected, he beat him in every single match. It was a confidence boost if nothing else, not that Zack needed any more confidence given that he was in the top ranks of the world's most elite military. He was trying to help his friend make it into SOLDIER 1__st__ Class, but it was going to take more than a few days of hard work and sweat. _

_Zack walked over to the side of the room and took a big slug of water. Turning to face his friend, he said, "Hey man, good work-out."_

_Nearly doubled over, Kunsel panted heavily as he struggled to catch his breath. "Thanks." He paused momentarily, sucking in a big breath of air. "Though I guess I should be the one thanking you ."_

_Waving a hand in dismissal, Zack said, "Don't mention it."_

_After a few minutes of cooling down, Kunsel walked over to Zack and propped himself up on the wall. Then he grabbed up his water bottle and took it down in slow sips. Wiping off his mouth, he said, "I'll beat you one of these days." _

_This prompted a smirk from Zack, "Ha! And I'll manage to beat Sephiroth someday. . . "_

_With a shrug, his friend said, "Well, stranger things have happened, like Bubba getting laid last Friday night." _

_Zack nearly choked on his water, "Oh man, I heard about that. What happened?"_

"_I think he met her at a bar. Not sure what she was thinking. He's no Prince Charming, if you know what I mean." _

"_I almost feel sorry for her," Zack said, his voice taking on a serious tone. _

"_Don't be. I heard they're going out again this weekend." _

_Zack gave his friend a playful shove, the force of it sending Kunsel back a few steps. "Get out of here."_

"_No, I'm serious," Kunsel said, trying not to laugh. _

_Looking down at the floor thoughtfully, Zack replied, "Heh, guess there's someone out there for everyone."_

"_Yep, guess so." Kunsel glanced at his watch and then up at Zack. "Hey, it's almost one o'clock. Don't you have that teaching thing at one?"_

_Zack pulled out his phone and took note of the time, fifteen minutes before one o'clock. "Damn. . . Guess I don't have time for a shower. I better get going." He crammed everything into his bag and grabbed a protein bar to eat along the way. "Alright, I'll see ya later man," he said while jogging out the door. _

_He made it to the gym in record time, running the whole way. As he opened the door, the nervous chatter of the Infantrymen burst out, nearly assaulting him. 'They must be excited cause it's their first time with a real sword,' he thought with a smile. Upon entering, he noticed several heads turn in his direction, and like a ripple that went through the audience, more heads turned toward him in succession until the whole auditorium had their eyes on him. While walking across the room, he searched for Cloud in the audience and found him, a flaxen blob towards the back. He caught Cloud's gaze and gave him a smile. _

_The room had become suddenly silent as Zack assumed his position at the front of the room. The overseeing instructor introduced Zack to much fanfare and applause. Once it quieted down, Zack spoke, a big smile on his face. "Are you guys ready?" _

_The room replied with an enthusiastic, "Yeah!"_

_With a hearty fist pump, Zack said, "Now that's what I like to hear. Before we get started, we need to go over a few things. Unlike the wooden swords you've been practicing with, these steel swords can send you goons to the infirmary with a life threatening wound. Their tips have been blunted on purpose, but they can still deal some hefty damage." Zack looked back towards the other instructor as he spoke, "I was of the understanding that to be in this class you all had to pass a mandatory sword safety test, is that correct?" The instructor nodded. "Alright then, so if I see any of you violating the safety rules I'll take away your sword and give you a potato peeler instead. Is that clear?"_

"_Sir, yes sir!" they chanted in unison._

_Zack walked over to the bin of swords and pulled one out. He held it up for everyone to see. "You will be using the standard issue Longsword for now. When and if you move up to SOLDIER, you will be allowed to specialize in sword fighting and choose your blade. Are there any questions so far?"_

_An eager hand shot up. Zack acknowledged him and the infantryman started speaking, "Since you're a 1__st__ Class SOLDIER, do you know Sephiroth?"_

_Zack smiled, nearly blushing. "Yes, I do know Sephiroth. One might even call us friends. Alright, next question." _

_Several more hands went up in the air. "Alright, guy with the freckles," Zack said, pointing in his direction. _

"_What is Sephiroth really like? Is he as cold as everyone says he is?"_

_Scratching the back of his head, Zack responded tentatively, "Well, he has his moments. . . " Zack cut himself off before he said something he might regret. _

_Then he called on another person with their hand raised, who asked, "Does Sephiroth really impale his enemies?" _

_The room grew suddenly quiet, everyone leaning in towards Zack to hear the response. Zack raised an eyebrow and paused before replying, "Uh. . . That's not really something I feel like talking about here." There was a loud groan from the class. With a sigh, Zack replied, "Does anyone have a question about what we're doing today?" All hands in the air came down with the rapidity of a burst balloon. "Okay, now you may come to the front and we will pass out the equipment."_

_Everyone rushed up to the front of the room, whereby Zack reminded them to form a single-file line. Zack then proceeded to pass out the swords, while their regular instructor passed out helmets and steel abdomen guards. As Cloud came up to collect his weapon, he looked down, avoiding Zack. "Hey Cloud, you ready to show me your stuff?" Zack asked._

_Cloud looked up and met Zack's gaze. Giving him a shy smile, he replied, "Yeah."_

_Zack gave his friend a hearty slap on the arm, "Awesome!"_

_The line stopped momentarily as several people watched Cloud walk back to his spot. Zack couldn't help but notice the cold glares sent in his friend's direction. With a loud clap of his hands, Zack garnered everyone's attention. "Alright people, let's keep this line moving."_

_Once everyone had gotten their equipment, Zack grabbed one of the leftover swords and walked back to the front of the room. He held up the pock-marked, tarnished blade for everyone to see. "These swords have seen better days, some more than others." The class laughed softly. Zack waited a moment before it was quiet again. "But they're just for practice." As he continued, his voice changed, as if he was __channeling__ someone else, someone with a somber deep-pitched voice. "You must earn the right to wield a sword with honor." The room was silent for a few seconds, in mourning for something that had already come to pass. Then his voice returned to normal. "Alright, let's do this!"_

_Zack instructed them to pair up and chose the other instructor as his partner. Before each exercise, he would break down the steps and demonstrate it as he talked them through it. Then he would go through the whole thing in real-time. He was patient at first, but as time went on their awkward stances and fumbling thrusts started to wear him down. To prevent himself from giving up on the class, Zack had to remind himself that up until this point, they'd been practicing with wooden swords and the weight of the steel was throwing off their balance. _

_However, Cloud stood out from the crowd, proving to be more skilled than he led everyone to believe. Unlike the other students, he simulated the movements with ease, accompanied by a certain level of grace not usually seen in beginners. _

_With his trained eye Zack was quick to notice. What Cloud lacked in rifle skills he made up for with a sword . Great swordsmen were born not made and Zack was beginning to think Cloud's destiny was to wield a sword. He kept his sights on Cloud frequently throughout the session. SOLDIER was always looking for new talent and try-outs for the program were only a few weeks away. It was all Cloud had been talking about for the past few weeks and it looked as if his friend actually had a decent chance. He would talk to him about it during lunch. _

_At the end of two hours Zack called for a much needed break. When the recruits came back he made the announcement that at the end of each session they would hold a tournament. He explained the rules of the game, mainly that it ended after an effective hit from one of the opponents. However, a critical hit capable of sending their opponent to the infirmary would result in an automatic loss for the aggressor. _

_Scanning the audience he said, "Hmmmm, let's see. Who wants to be first?" Looking past a multitude of raised hands, he saw Cloud shrinking down as much as possible, trying to avoid the inevitable. "How about Cloud and. . ." he pointed to the eager boy in front of Cloud, "you, what's your name?"_

"_Aden," the guy replied._

_With much vim and vigor, Zack said, "Alright, Aden and Cloud, come on up." Aden came forward with large strides while Cloud drug his feet the whole way to the front. Clapping Cloud on the shoulder, Zack said, "Have some faith in yourself." _

_Cloud nodded and replied with a meek, "Yes, sir."_

"_Any questions before we start?" Both opponents shook their heads. "Come over here," Zack said, pointing to an area of the gym away from the crowd, "and assume a fighting stance." Cloud and Aden moved over to the designated area. Each slid back into a lunge, gripping their sword with their right hand. "Alright, ready and begin!"_

_Aden smirked and Cloud gripped his sword tighter. They danced around each other for a few seconds before Aden thrust his sword out towards Cloud's sternum. Cloud parried the attack and took advantage of the opening and swiped at Aden's middle, but Aden jumped back just before the sword made contact. Cloud stepped back into position. A moment later Aden swung his sword overhead to cut from above while Cloud countered the attack with a cut from below. Their swords clashed in an impressive display of steel on steel. Aden was quick to strike, but always at the expense of leaving himself open to attack. Like before, he came at Cloud with an overhead cut, but this time Cloud swung his sword at Aden's neck with just enough force to stop before slicing into the delicate skin. _

"_Game!" Zack yelled._

_Cloud stood back, stunned, barely able to grip his sword. In the brevity of a sword swipe the fight was finished. Zack came over and inspected Aden for injury while the rest of the class came up to Cloud and congratulated him. Aden threw a scowl in Cloud's direction. Either Cloud was ignoring him or didn't notice because he continued on as before, basking in the praise of his peers._

_Zack dismissed the group and they took off towards the showers. Cloud straggled behind, so Zack ran up to him and threw a friendly arm around his shoulder. "Oh man, that was amazing control! Where did you get that can of whoop ass?"_

_A smile tugged at the corner of Cloud's lips, and he replied, "Why, you want to buy one?"_

"_Look at you, one win and it goes right to your head," Zack said with a playful ruffle of his friend's hair. Before Cloud could protest, Zack took off towards his belongings. "We're still on for lunch, right?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_Okay, I need to talk to the instructor about a few things and then rush home and take a shower. I'll meet you at your apartment."_

_Cloud nodded in agreement and continued walking towards the locker room. Upon entering he went straight to his locker, avoiding the glances of curiosity thrown in his direction. His friend Dustin was already there and preparing to take a shower. "Hey Cloud, that was quite the show out there eh?"_

"_Yeah. . . "_

"_What kind of water are you drinking?" Dustin joked._

"_The kind that makes you a superhero, obviously," Cloud replied, a touch of dry sarcasm in his voice. They undressed and showered, Dustin engaging in aimless chatter to fill up the silence. As they came back to their lockers they noticed Aden and his friends standing there, brows furrowed and eyes narrowed, waiting for them. Cloud ignored them even though he realized it wouldn't make a difference in the end. _

_Aden slammed Cloud's locker shut before he could get to it. "Hey, thanks for making a fool of me out there."_

_Cloud stared at his locker, as though doing so was the key to opening it. He replied in a flat voice, "You don't have to thank me, you did that yourself."_

_His friends, "ooooohed," provocatively, spurning Aden to punch a nearby locker. He shook his inflamed fist as he said, "You better watch your back Strife. Next time this will be your face."_

_Cloud kept his focus on the locker, while Dustin looked up tentatively at Aden and his gang. As they walked away, Cloud opened it with the same nonchalance as usual, acting as if nothing had happened. "Damn. . . That guy's a jerk," Dustin commented._

"_Yeah. . . " Cloud replied. _

"_Sorry Cloud. . . "_

"_Not your fault." _

_They were silent as they finished packing up. The background noise of showers running was all the sound they needed at the moment. Walking out of the locker room, Dustin asked, "So you ready to get lunch?"_

"_I forgot to tell you, Zack's taking me out," Cloud said brightly, almost beaming, as it were an accomplishment to be proud of. _

"_Oh okay, that's cool. I'll just grab something and bring it back to the dorm. "_

_Digging into his pockets, Cloud said, "I better call Zack and tell him I'm on my way." He stopped suddenly, a panicked expression taking over his face. _

_Dustin turned around and watched Cloud pawing frantically through his bag. "What's wrong, did you lose your phone?"_

"_I remember taking it out while we were in the locker room and. . ." He paused momentarily as realization set in, staring straight ahead as he said, "I bet I left it in the locker room. I've got to go back." Cloud darted off without a response from his friend. _

_Dustin trailed after him, running the whole way to keep up with him. Arriving at the entrance to the locker room, Dustin spun Cloud around and said, "You sure this is such a good idea? Aden and his douche-bag friends might still be in there."_

_Cloud furrowed his eyebrows. "I'm not going to let him boss me around. You can stay out here if you want." _

_With a shake of the head, Dustin replied, "No, I'll come with you."_

"_If you insist." As they walked through the door, Cloud added, "Besides they're probably already gone." The locker room was silent, save for the sound of water dripping from a faucet. Cloud let his defenses down as he ventured toward his locker. As he turned the corner, he saw Aden leaning against the wall with his phone in hand. _

"_Looking for this Strife?" Aden said, holding up Cloud's black state of the art cell phone. His three friends chuckled in the background. Cloud's body went rigid, and he clenched his fists in preparation for a fight. Then Aden dropped his beloved possession. Out of instinct, Cloud leaned forward to grab it, but the phone had already hit the floor. As Cloud's fingers came within inches of the shiny black object, Aden brought his heel down and crushed it, black shards scattering everywhere. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_With a torn shirt and a bloody lip, Dustin came running into the gym looking for help. He found Zack in a corner talking to the instructor, so he ran over to the pair and blurted out, "There's a fight. Aden and Cloud in the locker room." _

_Zack took off before Dustin could turn around to lead. He flung open the door to find Cloud being shoved up against a locker. "What the hell are you doing?" Zack announced. _

_Aden let go of Cloud and took a step back to remove himself from the situation. Cloud wiped his bloody nose and stared at Aden with a harsh accusatory glare. It was enough. 'The scene spoke for itself,' Zack thought, 'four against one.' As Zack walked towards Cloud, Aden stepped away even further. Placing his hands gently on Cloud's shoulders, Zack asked, "Hey Spike, you alright?"_

_Cloud shook his head in denial, his wet spikes clinging to the side of his head. The fresh bruises had yet to form, but Zack knew his friend would be in a world of hurt tomorrow. "Dustin, take Cloud to the infirmary to get checked out." As Dustin approached, Zack added, "I don't want you skipping out on this to go home. This is an order, do you understand?"_

"_Yes sir," Cloud mumbled weakly._

"_I'll come by later to check on you and make sure you're alright. We'll have to do lunch another time." Zack handed Cloud off to Dustin, wrapping his friend's arm around Dustin's shoulder. He grimaced as he watched them walk off together, Cloud walking stiff and awkward in an attempt to hide a limp. _

_Zack turned around to face the culprits. "You guys didn't have enough fun at practice?" he reprimanded. _

"_Cloud started it," Aden replied defensively._

"_That's not the way it looks from here." In an authoritative voice, Zack said, "I'm reporting this incident to your superiors. You four are dismissed until you receive further orders. Is that understood?"_

"_Yes sir," they replied. Aden glared at Zack before turning to follow his friends. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

"Zack!" she cried, her voice straining. Standing several feet away from Zack, there was little she could do but call for him. "Zack, are you okay?"

This time he turned his head to the side and looked up at her with glossy eyes. Then he shook his head and took a long survey of the surrounding area. He got up, quickly brushed the dirt off his pants, and replied, "Yeah, I think it's the mako in my system."

His heart beat laboriously under the thin film of mud. He wouldn't tell her what he already knew, for what had started could not be undone. The tide of repressed memories had risen past his barrier of self-defense and it was only a matter of time before he started to drown.

Walking towards her, he closed the gap between them. "Looks like Cloud is doing okay." She nodded in agreement. His voice was weak, but gained strength as he continued talking. "I think this incident bought us some time. Let's head back to the river, take a bath, and make a fire."

She couldn't look him in the eyes. She merely nodded and gave a weak smile while her hands wrung her dress wildly. "You sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied, his voice a bit too confident. With his eyes trained on Cloud, Zack said, "I bet Cloud can't wait to get a bath." After standing Cloud up, Zack hugged his middle and threw him over his shoulder. "Alright, let's go."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

A/N: Thanks so much to my wonderful **Cookie** for beta-reading and providing ideas and inspiration for this chapter! Thanks also to my lovely friends who helped me with ideas, grammar, and what not: **Goopy Sentimentalist, Blue Jae, Armae, **and** Shippudenfanatic**. *Hugs* you all! This story wouldn't be possible without you ^_~

So it's been longer than 3 months since I published the last chapter and for that I am sorry. I never had writer's block or lost inspiration. On the contrary, I've stayed devoted to this story. Life has almost been too much to handle in the past few months. In the last few weeks I've had to work as much as 80 hours/week. I'm a pharmacy student in my last year and about to graduate. We do rotations like medical students, and some of them are 12-15 hours/day. I also have several health issues which consume much of my time and energy, and then there was the most unpleasant fanfiction drama in January.

Then this last week there was the earthquake in Japan. I'm sure you all know about it. My husband is full-blooded Japanese, so his whole family lives in Japan. His hometown, Ishinomaki, is in the Miyagi prefecture, which was devastated by the recent earthquake and tsunami. It's about a one and a half hour drive northeast from Sendai. His parents survived, but they may have lost their home and they're taking refuge in an elementary school. The rest of his family, brothers and sisters, live in Tokyo, but even there it's getting bad.

Needless to say life has been difficult lately. . . I don't want sympathy, just trying to explain why this chapter took so long. Updates should be faster from now because I'm about to graduate :D Thank you once again for all the support and reviews! It's helped keep me going when I was completely exhausted. If you want to stay updated about me or my story you can check out my blog. The link to it is "Homepage" on my profile.


	25. Chapter 25

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 25**

_**Beta Readers: Cookiecat and Bluejae**_

_**Rating: M**_

_The flashback in this chapter contains implied sexual content**  
**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

They walked back to the stream, following the path outlined by their footprints: two pairs of large ones, followed by a smaller pair half a step behind. The morning became still, settling around them, stagnant almost, like the precipitation in the air that preludes a rainstorm. The wind that had been blowing through the trees was now no more than a hushed whisper, while the sweet serenade of nearby birds had all but vanished. Consumed with recent events, Zack kept his head down and focused on walking, one step at a time.

Trying to lighten the atmosphere, Lilleas shared some stories about a cat she once owned, but Zack remained silent. She realized that either Zack was so lost in his own world that he didn't hear her talking or he was ignoring her.

Upon reaching the stream, Zack approached it without hesitation. He slid the backpack off along with his other bags in one fluid motion. With Cloud at his side he continued his current pace as they walked through the water.

There was something about the way Zack walked that made Lilleas worry, a steady gait with head tilted down, as if he was approaching death and did not want to meet it face on. She stayed at the edge, apprehensive, eyes wide and unbelieving as the murky greenish water began to swallow them up, first their legs, then their hips, waists, chests, shoulders. . .

"Stop!" she cried, her voice shattering the silence.

The pair stopped and turned around. Zack stared at Lilleas and she, unable to look away, stared back at him. What she saw took her breath away and for a moment she ceased to breathe. His eyes, glazed over and vacant, reminded her of those of a ghost, the apparition of a little boy she had known long ago. A house in her neighborhood had burned to the ground, and none of the children survived. Even still, after all these years, his haunted expression was seared into her memory, and those eyes, she remembered those most of all. Eyes so empty she could see right through them, like tinted blue glass.

She had hoped she would never see those eyes again, but there they were, staring her down. Without even testing the temperature, she jumped in the water and froze for a second as her body acclimated to the frigid conditions. Then she made her way through, the cool liquid resisting her every step of the way, slowing her down as if she had leaden shoes on her feet. When she finally reached him, she stood on the tips of her toes and tilted her head up so that she could maintain her head above water.

"Zack!" the word hung in the air before crashing down, waking him out of his stupor. "What's wrong with you?"

He shook his head. "I don't know. . . " As he regained his bearings, his grip on Cloud started to slip, and Lilleas watched in horror as he was submerged.

"Cloud!" was all she could manage to spit out. Zack looked to both sides and immediately noticed Cloud was missing.

Zack went under, grasping wildly at the water to find his friend. After a few tense seconds, his hand found Cloud's arm, then the rest of his body. He encircled his friend's waist and yanked him up. Upon surfacing, Cloud coughed and sputtered, spraying droplets of water as he cleared his lungs.

Zack's own chest heaved with anxiety, his heart laboring wildly. With shaky arms, Zack struggled to hold onto his friend while scraping the mud off of his own face. Now that he could see, he gave Cloud a few rough pats on the back to help him cough up the remaining liquid he had inhaled.

He turned to face his friend, his voice trembling, "Gods I'm really sorry about that Cloud." Grasping Cloud firmly, he moved them to shallow waters. Then he began to wash off the slimy mud. After a minute of painstaking labor, cupping the water with his free hand and then wiping off the viscous substance with the same one, he'd only managed to clean part of one arm. He turned toward Lilleas and asked, "Can you give me a little help here?"

She took a step towards Cloud, close enough now that she could feel his warm breath in spurts across her forehead. She looked down, watching the brown globs of mud slowly sinking through the water and then disappear. Turning her head up towards Zack, she asked incredulous, "What am I supposed to use, my _hands_?"

Without stopping his current task, he replied, "What else are you going to use?"

"I don't know. . . " Cupping the water in both hands, she looked upon it with great consideration, watching as the liquid leaked through the small crevices of her fingers.

Zack prompted her out of her thoughts by asking, "What's the holdup?"

In a noticeably flustered voice, she answered, "Oh, I-I was just thinking."

"Wash now and think later," he replied curtly.

Afraid she might further embarrass herself, she remained silent and gave a slight nod of the head. Digging her hands deep in the water, she brought up a handful of liquid with which to bathe him. By this point he was trembling, his teeth chattering in time to the splash of droplets falling from her hands. The sun overhead could not penetrate beyond the top layer, so the stream was icy cold. Only now did she notice that she too was shaking. She attempted to still her arms, but that only made her whole body shake with a greater intensity, so she did the best she could, sloppily splashing water onto Cloud, and wiping the mud off in large awkward strokes.

When they were finished, brown flecks still dotted his skin and hair. It would have taken too long to clean him spotless, time they didn't have for Cloud was blue and tremulous from the near freezing temperature of the water, as was Lilleas. While Zack walked Cloud out of the stream, Lilleas hurriedly washed herself off, not even stopping to realize that she was only in her underwear. Her semi-nude state become apparent as she emerged from the water, the air cold against her skin, like fingers of ice wrapping around her.

On the bank of the stream Zack was busy dressing Cloud, too distracted for anything else at the moment. Behind him was the backpack with her clothes. She covered herself up best as she could with her arms before calling attention to herself, "Zack," he turned towards her, "could you get my clothes out for me?"

"Sure, I just have to finish dressing Cloud."

She waited for about thirty seconds, until the cold got the best of her, then decided to go about getting the clothes herself. Once out of the water, she quickly snatched up the bag. Out of instinct, Zack stopped and turned towards the noise.

"Don't look," she said sharply as she ran for cover behind the nearest tree.

"I wasn't looking at _you_," Zack said, slightly annoyed but more tired than anything else

Lilleas figured responding wasn't worth the effort. Before putting on her dress, she shook the wrinkles out of it, then smoothed out the stubborn ones after putting it on. When she came back from behind the tree, she saw Zack crouched down by Cloud, waiting, still and patient, like he had always been waiting. As she approached, he looked up and said, "You stay here and take care of Cloud. I'm going to go wash up." She nodded and took his place beside Cloud. Zack wrapped the blanket around them before walking off.

The blonde man sitting beside her seemed like a stranger. If it was possible, she knew him less now than when they first met, but her heart still reached out to him. She wrapped her arm around his shoulders, her numb fingers holding onto him as firm as they would allow. He leaned into her with a groan. She replied, her voice somber, "Yeah. I know, I'm cold too."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

After everything was done, Zack built a small fire out of dry twigs, branches, and shrubbery. Such fires were his custom, born out of necessity during the Wutai war while spending long cold nights in the forest hiding from the enemy.

Zack had managed to catch a fish with his bare hands, so he prepared it for consumption while Lilleas watched on, her eyes large as he deboned and gutted the creature. They speared pieces of it on twigs and roasted it over the fire, the white flesh turning a golden brown as it cooked. Zack took turns eating while feeding Cloud for he was too hungry to wait. Then he moved a few feet away from the pair and sat down. Lilleas didn't question and he didn't answer.

Hunched over, he watched the fire burn, its orange glow lapping at the grey sky above. The smell of smoke was strong. It filled his lungs and made him cough. He looked over to the side to check on Cloud and Lilleas; they were sleeping. Some time must have passed since the fire first grabbed his attention. He sighed, not even aware he had done so.

The pop and crackle of the burning branches brought his thoughts back to the fire. It spoke to his soul, the element of fire, to a deep-seated desire for security, reassuring him that everything would be okay. He leaned in closer to the enticing warmth. It was a lie, all of it lies: nothing would ever be okay.

He looked deeper into the flames, his mind projecting horrific images of the past onto the amber glow. He wanted to look away but he did not. At first the figures clung to the fire but as he continued to stare, the figures became more realistic, seemingly emerging from the fiery background and coming to life. . .

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_He awoke in a grey room, the walls, ceiling, floor, all of it grey. He blinked once, twice, but nothing had changed. A few seconds later he remembered that he was trapped in the underground lair of Hojo's lab. His heart started pounding in his chest. It always took him a while to adjust to the fact that this was reality, his reality. Or perhaps it was something he would never let himself accept. It had only been a matter of days since they'd been captured, but that didn't matter. Death would own him before another human did, he was certain of that. _

_Zack turned on his side. To his left was Cloud, bunched up in blankets, wide-eyed and staring up at the ceiling. He watched him for a few moments before speaking. "What ya looking at?" Zack asked._

_Cloud replied, his voice void of emotion, void of anything at all, "Nothing."_

"_Yeah that's what I thought." Zack rolled onto his back. After staring at the ceiling for several minutes, he managed a close approximation to calm. It was solid stone interlaced with hairline cracks, which after awhile seemed to dissolve into patterns, one of them vaguely resembling a hamburger. His stomach growled. "Man I could really go for a hamburger and fries about now." _

_Cloud groaned. "How can you even think about food?"_

"_What?" Zack replied with slight indignation. "So I'm hungry." _

_Gripping his stomach, Cloud sat up slowly, his face green with nausea. "Oh man, I think I'm going to puke." Cloud swung his legs over the side of the bed and hobbled over to the bathroom with haste._

_Zack watched his friend disappear followed shortly by the sound of vomiting. Zack sat up in bed and called out to his friend, "Hey are you okay?"_

_A faint mumble originated from the bathroom. Zack rose up from his cot, curling his toes as his bare feet came in contact with the cold stone floor. He entered the bathroom only to find Cloud splayed out on the floor, hugging the toilet. __Cloud looked up at his friend, his eyes as deep a blue as the water in a bottomless well, the sorrow endless_. If it was possible, Zack would have given him the world in that instant, but with conditions as they were he couldn't give him anything but a kind word and a pat on the back. 'For all the good that will do,' Zack thought bitterly, 'gestures of friendship aren't going to stop his puking or get us out of here.'

_Breaking him out of his thoughts was the violent sound of Cloud purging the contents of his already empty stomach, gagging on the bitter taste of bile as it came up. _

_Zack crouched down by his friend and laid a firm hand on his upper back. "Must be the mako. First few doses really mess you up. It's like the worse hangover you've ever had."_

_Without looking up, Cloud spoke into the toilet bowl, his voice shaking, "When does it stop?"_

_With a sigh Zack replied, "For some people a few days, for others a few weeks, and for some unlucky bastards it never goes away." _

"_Great," Cloud groaned, then leaned in closer to the toilet bowl as he retched. _

_Zack groaned. "We better get you something to drink or you're going to get dehydrated." He took a moment to think, promptly realizing they had nothing but the shirts on their bare backs. Then he looked down at his hands and came up with an idea suddenly. Turning on the faucet, he shoved his hands underneath the running water. _

_Cloud looked up, not even bothering to wipe the gastric juices dripping from his chin. "What are you doing?" _

"_What does it look like I'm doing?"_

"_You sure that water is safe?" Cloud said apprehensively, his voice flat despite his fear. _

"_It's safer than the mako they pump into us every day," Zack said darkly. Placing his cupped hands in the near vicinity of Cloud's face, Zack ordered, "Drink."_

_Zack's determined gaze overpowered Cloud's tired one, so he obeyed, bringing his face into Zack's hands, taking slow sips. As he gained confidence, he began to take large gulps of water. Zack continued giving his friend water despite the fact that he only kept half of it down. Zack stayed with Cloud for several hours while he continued purging the sickness. Exhausted, Cloud fell asleep on his arm that was resting on the rim of the toilet bowl. At this point Zack helped him crawl back to bed. Once he made it under the covers, Cloud took his pillow and clutched it over his abdomen. _

_Zack sat on the other bed, gazing upon his friend. Words escaped him at the moment, so he just continued watching Cloud until he fell asleep. Then he laid back in bed and closed his eyes, waiting for sleep to overtake him. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

"_Hey!" A voice from outside their cell shouted. _

_That voice, Zack recognized it before even seeing the face. . . Aden. Zack sat upright, ready for action. On the other bed, Cloud's eyes had opened, but he was still lying down with the pillow pressed tightly against his stomach. _

_Beyond the bars of their cell were two men dressed in ShinRa garb. One of them was a nameless ShinRa grunt that Zack didn't recognize. The other man, a tall heavy-set man with a small pointy nose and thin lips, was someone he had hoped to forget. _

_Aden looked the pair over, sizing them up. "Well, well, well, look who we have here, Ex-SOLDIER 1__st__ Class Zack Fair and his girlfriend Cloud Strife." The other man chuckled. "You know, I transferred here for the pay increase, but it looks like I got more than I bargained for." Grabbing onto the bars Aden directed his gaze at Zack alone. "So tell me if the rumors are true. Is Strife a good fuck?" _

_Zack tensed, all the muscles of his body going rigid, coiling up like a spring. Aden started humping the bars of the cell. Then he threw his head back and moaned, "Oh Cloud, nnnngh, so tight. . . "_

_Pounding his fist on the bed, Zack shouted, "Shut the fuck up!"_

_Aden's hip gyrations became more intense, now at a frenzied pace, "Ohhhh, Cloud!"_

_Zack sprung from the bed and ran up to Aden. He reached out between the bars, grabbed a fistful of hair, and yanked Aden towards him, slamming him into the steel bars in the process. "I said shut the fuck up!"_

"_Get him off me man!" Aden cried, struggling to free himself of Zack's hold. The other man reached in with his taser. _

_All of Zack's sensory and motor nerves fired at once, an unbearable sensation, like a row of shingles being rubbed against his spinal cord. His legs gave out from under him, yet, he still managed to hold onto Aden's hair with an iron grip, bringing him down as he fell. He had yet to recover from the first one when the other man discharged another shock from his weapon. _

_Both men screamed simultaneously. Zack fell back on the ground, his muscles twitching as sensation started to return. In his hand was a tuft of brown hair. Cloud ran over to Zack's side, watching in horror as he writhed on the ground. Shock had momentarily taken away Cloud's ability to speak, so he just stared at his friend, feeling helpless and scared all at once. _

_Aden ran a hand through his hair, stopping on the bald spot, "Shit!" Then he pointed his finger at Zack menacingly, and said, "I'll get you back for that! You and your lil' bitch." He ran his hand through his hair once more, as if he couldn't believe what had happened. "Fuck!" _

**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**

"Hey," a soft voice called, pulling him out of his trance. "Are you okay?" He recognized the voice. He looked to the side and confirmed it was Lilleas. A sigh of relief escaped his lips. She was sitting next to him, a look of worry marring her gentle features.

Wiping the sweat off of his forehead, he replied, "Yeah, but I think it's time to put the fire out and get going." Lilleas watched as he walked over to their bag and pulled out the collapsible bucket. He turned, his back towards her as he walked toward the stream. A grimace crossed his face, but he knew she could not see, so he didn't fight it. She must never know. To tell the story would only confirm that it had happened. The wound was still fresh but in time it would heal, that is, if he didn't pick at the scab.

When Zack came back, Lilleas had gone back over to Cloud, but she was still watching Zack closely. As he raised the bucket, he caught sight of the fire once more, within it a thin-lipped smile, teeth bared in a sneer. His grip on the pail tightened until his knuckles blanched. Then he doused the flames.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Within another part of the forest marched ShinRa's men, row upon row of metal helmets, glinting in the sporadic sunlight. They stopped for a break while the Major set about figuring out why he had lost contact with the half of his troop that had headed east: Lieutenant Smith and his group of soldiers.

It had been several hours now, more than enough cause for worry. No contact, no call for help even. It was as if they had dropped off the face of the planet, but things like that don't just happen. Someone or _something_ had gotten to them. He had ordered the location of their last radio call to be traced. At this point they needed to be found.

He barked out the new orders to his men, they were to change course, to march southeast instead of continuing on their current path north. The men followed, dutifully and without question with the Major striding on ahead, the shadow of his stride enormous upon the earth.

Several hours later they neared the approximate location where the other troop was when they last had contact. They mounted a slope, ahead of them the Major could see several glints of light. 'Helmets perhaps,' he thought darkly. The Major quickened his pace. The soldiers followed his lead, their gait now at a run.

The Major was the first to see. Dozens of bodies littered the ground, fanned out in a semi-circular pattern. With the grey sky overhead the scene looked somewhat formal, like a mass suicide as part of a ritual. His heart sunk in his chest and now there was just a hole where it used to be. Over time facing death had become easier, but even still, he felt himself die inside a little each time. These weren't just nameless men, they were his men and in a way he felt somewhat responsible for their deaths.

Most of the men behind him stopped, but others kept going for they were too focused on the sight of the mass carnage to notice their leader. Their whispering had now become frightful chatter, loud enough to scare the birds out of the trees.

The Major turned to face them. His penetrating gaze froze all of them in place and any that had doubts about his leadership now understood why he was in command. "Stay," he ordered, his voice booming but without heat. A blanket of silence covered them all and everything became still.

As he approached the first corpse, he saw the look of horror on the man's face, as if he was caught by surprise and did not even have the opportunity to fight back. Upon closer inspection, he noticed the lack of wounds. There were no holes or slash marks anywhere. Then he examined the next corpse and found that it was also free of trauma.

He looked around him, all of the bodies were the same, purplish limbs rigid with death, no sign of blood anywhere. 'They must have been killed by some form of magic,' he thought, 'perhaps ice considering there were no scorch marks on any of the men. This was the work of someone experienced in magic with a master level material. The specimen wasn't capable of that, was he? Doubtful. . . '

He reached into his pocket and pulled out his PHS. It was time to call headquarters. He couldn't go on with only half of his men, especially considering there was some other deadly threat lurking in the shadows. "This is Major Newton. Over"

The voice from the other end replied, "This is Mike. ShinRa Army Division 5. Over."

"Mission Abort. Over."

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**A/N: **So it was less than two months since the last update :) Pharmacy school just got out (Omg, 9 years of college) and I'm graduating next week. I should have more time in the next few months before I throw myself into the working world. I spent a few weeks updating chapter 3, and then I started on the new chapter. I swear those chapter updates take almost as long as writing a new chapter. That's probably why I've done so few of them.

Thanks again to my beta's **Blue Jae** and **Cookiecat**! Not only do they help me with grammar and logic, they also help me with plotting and creating the storyline. They definitely make this story better :) A big thanks also to **Goopy Sentimentalist **who is always there to put up with my frequent questions about this story! Also for the long pep talk prior to posting this and reassuring me that I don't suck ;)

About Zack in this chapter. . . So seeing Aden has triggered his PTSD. That's part of the reason he was acting so weird in this chapter. Also, he's got to have had some psychological damage from everything that happened to him in the lab. I don't think he escaped without being a little loony. Not as much as Cloud, but he's got issues.

**Reply to Anon Reviewers:**

**To Laci:** Thanks for the review :) I'm glad you liked my writing style! To me that's more important than the actual story itself. I thought about what you said, the repetitiveness and I think you have a point, especially in the beginning chapters. As I go back and edit the chapters (just finished chapter 3) I'll definitely keep this in mind :) Of course the nature of this story is repetitive in itself, which I can't fix :/

**To Banana: **Yay! I'm glad you liked the last chapter :) I liked it quite a bit myself. Some chapters I like better than others. Regarding Aden, well Zack was traumatized not just because he recognized him but because of a dark past. It's sort of alluded to in this chapter. Sort of :/ Don't want to give any more details than that. He's kind of going through like a PTSD thing, which was triggered by seeing Aden. I'm also glad you like Lilleas. A few things about her. She won't be around forever. She'll be gone by the time the canon events in the game/story start. (Nothing worse than inserting an OC where they don't belong ). She definitely has a past though I'm not too sure how much will be revealed. That all depends on her and Zack and how much they want to tell me :P


	26. Chapter 26

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 26**

_**Beta Reader: Cookiecat**_

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**Summary of Last Chapter: **Zack, suffering from PTSD, nearly drowned himself and Cloud in a lake before Lilleas saved them. Zack has a traumatic memory about meeting Aden in Hojo's underground lab. Aden and his friend, both ShinRa grunts, had been assigned to work as security guards in the lab. Then the POV switches over to a ShinRa Major who discovers the dead bodies of his men in the forest. Upon closer examination he sees that they were killed by some sort of magic because there were no marks on them at all. He's doubtful about whether the specimen is capable of such magic. He phones in the verdict and aborts the mission before any more of his men die.

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The sun disappeared behind the cover of clouds, pulling the golden rays of light from the sky until everything was grey once more. Their shadows disappeared into the darkness, and the forest became silent, save for the snap of twigs under their feet and the whisper of leaves as the wind passed by. The day shifted into evening, but they didn't notice until the stars appeared. They had to press on until it was too dark to see the path ahead and only then could they rest.

As night came they found a place to camp. They set down their bags and began to settle down for the night. Out of the dark silence came Zack's voice, cracked from disuse. "No fire tonight." It was the first thing either of them had said all evening. Lilleas nodded, not even turning to face him as she did so.

Zack set out the blanket while Lilleas smoothed it out over the ground, the lingering moisture imparting a rank smell of mildew to the fabric. He laid Cloud down on the blanket beside her and tucked them in with the edges. Zack crouched down on the ground close to Cloud, grabbed the hard and lumpy backpack, and used it as a pillow.

The sky about him was still, the darkness infinite, extending into dimensions beyond comprehension. It made him feel small and insignificant, as if his trials and tribulations in this world made not even a ripple in the fabric of the cosmos. His existence was but a fleeting moment in the infinite expanse of time. The thought was oddly reassuring. Beside him, Cloud was breathing steadily. Beyond that he heard a loud sigh coming from Lilleas.

Zack propped himself up on his elbow and turned to face her. "I wanted to thank you for earlier." He paused, giving her a chance to respond but she did not. "You saved our lives." He reached over Cloud and placed a hand on her shoulder, giving her an affectionate squeeze. "Thanks."

Through the darkness he could see the faint shadow of a smile. She waited until he was resting on his back before she spoke, "You would have done the same."

Looking up at the sky he replied softly, "Yeah." A soft exhale escaped his lips. "Hey, do you think there's a life after this?"

Lilleas thought he might have been talking to himself, but the slight hesitation in his voice made her think otherwise. "Hmmm?"

"I mean, what do you think happens after you die?"

She sat up slowly so as not to disturb Cloud and turned towards Zack. "I thought you were reunited with your loved ones in a place like Gaia but nicer." She paused before continuing, her voice now somber, "That was a while ago. I don't know what I believe anymore."

Zack stopped to consider her words, the weight of each one. "Someone close to me once said that when you die you become a part of the Lifestream. I wonder if that means you'd never feel anything again. No hurt, pain, or suffering." He turned to face Cloud and reached out to stroke his hair, fingering the locks of spun gold. "No joy, happiness, or love." His fingers stilled, "Nothing."

In a hopeful voice she responded, "But if you don't feel anything then you won't care."

He continued on his same train of thought, as if he hadn't heard her. "All I ever am, all I ever will be is right here on Gaia. This is it, this is all there is. . ." His voice trailed off, the disbelief and fear lingering in the air between them.

As she gained confidence, her soft voice garnered an assertive edge. "It's not all bad. You're one of the few that sees things as it really is."

"Perhaps, but all I really wanted in this world was to be a hero."

"Who says you aren't one already."

Zack snorted, "Cloud. It's hard to claim you're a hero when you're the one that put them in that predicament you're saving them from."

"That's not what Cloud thinks, and you know it."

He opened his mouth to respond, but thought better of it and did not make a sound. He could feel the heat of her gaze upon him, but he did not look at her. Instead he kept his eyes trained on the sky, searching, as if the answer to life was somehow hidden amongst the stars. Eventually he heard the sound of rustling as Lilleas snuggled against Cloud to settle down for the night. As time passed, her breathing evened out, blending in with the distant sound of night-crawlers stalking their prey.

Encapsulated in the intimacy of the dark, he grabbed Cloud's hand and held it to his chest. "I'm gonna come through for you buddy. We'll make it to Midgar. I promise."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Lilleas awoke to the grey light of dawn settling around the trees. To the east she heard the faint sound of chirping, which grew louder steadily. She thought about waking Zack, but he looked so peaceful with his lips parted ever so slight. The last few nights had been rough, so she decided to not wake him, and left.

The sound seemed to be emanating from a thick clump of trees but stopped as she approached. She parted the thick branches to find a bright yellow ball of feathers. A pair of large eyes looked up at her, and the creature chirped, "Wark!"

She bent over to stroke its head and it cooed softly. "Where's your mother little one?" The baby chocobo looked up at her and blinked.

The area lacked any signs of a nest or recent habitation. Realizing that the mother had long disappeared, Lilleas scooped up the gaunt bird, his legs flailing as she did so. She cradled him to her chest, feeling the outline of his bones through his thin coat of feathers. The chick shivered against her as a cool morning breeze swept by.

Lilleas walked back to their place of morning respite, noting that both Cloud and Zack were still sleeping. "Now we have to be quiet. If Zack wakes up now he'll be grumpy. I'll introduce you later, after he wakes up."

At the sight of Cloud's yellow tuft, the chick chirped loudly and struggled against her. "Hold on," she reassured. After setting him down, he toddled over on unstable legs to Cloud's yellow nest of hair and burrowed into it. Cloud stirred but then settled back down into slumber. Lilleas couldn't help but smile.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

Upon waking, Zack found himself staring into deep pools of black, eyes so dark he could scarce see his own reflection. He bolted upright and instinctively reached for his sword. The creature darted into Cloud's hair, unaware that his behind was sticking straight up in the air. Zack released his grip on the sword and bent forward for a closer look. The creature had a stout body covered in fluffy yellow feathers, a shade of yellow matching the sun, and a pair of wings much too small to lift his large frame. Zack started to laugh. "It's just a baby chocobo." He turned towards Lilleas, who was watching from a distance. "How did it get here?"

She directed her gaze toward the ground as she answered, "I'm not sure. . ."

He eyed her suspiciously. "You mean to tell me this baby chocobo wandered over here on its own?"

Looking from Zack to the chocobo she replied, her voice wavering, "I guess."

"Well it doesn't matter how it got here. It's here now and we can't take it with us. We're a band of fugitives, not a three ring circus."

Lilleas walked over to the chocobo, scooped him up, and cradled him in her arms. Her voice was soft, like a mother speaking to her baby. "We can't just leave it here. It will die on its own." As she was saying this, she stroked the chocobo at the base of its neck and it cooed in response. Zack initially refused to hold the bird, but then the chocobo looked straight at him. Now in the morning light, the chocobo's dark eyes had softened to a more gentle shade of grey. The creature chirped, "Wark."

Zack's resolve melted, and he opened his arms to hold the creature, more like a gesture of surrender than one of welcome. He pet the chocobo clumsily, his large hands smooshing the creature down. The bird's eyes flattened into slits. Lilleas smiled and said, "See, he likes you."

Zack scoffed, "Yeah, yeah." His eyes drifted over to Cloud and rested there momentarily. With a sigh he started, "Looks like I've got more than one chocobo to take care of now. "

He looked off into the distance and paused, as if he expected to see something different than the day before, the outline of barren trees obscured by morning mist. All was grey. It was the color of progress, of steel melded into swords, fashioned into armor, and manufactured into ShinRa buildings, but that was then. Now it just meant another long day without end. He sighed without realizing he had done so.

"Well, now is as good a time as any. I doubt the weather will clear up. Let's get ready to go." Zack turned to find Lilleas still focused on Cloud. With a sharp clap of the hands, he said, "Chop, Chop." Lilleas snapped out of her daze and nodded quickly.

They crammed everything into their bags, packing the chocobo in last, his head sticking out through the unzipped top. Within minutes they were back on their feet and clearing a path through the forest. They decided to follow the river towards civilization, and from there they would reorient themselves and head east.

As they trudged through the forest , silence enshrouded them once more, suffocating, like the mist that lingered in the air. The journey had become too dangerous for Lilleas. That much Zack knew, but he was still undecided about how to best handle the situation, so up until now he had kept it in the back of his mind, tucked away like a secret for his own peace as much as hers.

Hours later night fell upon them and they were forced to camp. They made a small fire that seethed in the darkness, the ragged flames blowing downcountry, going out like a shout in the wind. As Zack got out their dinner of beef jerky and stale bread, the chocobo grazed nearby, pecking furiously at a dark green shrub.

Zack looked towards the chocobo. He spoke, his voice weak, "I just realized he doesn't have a name yet."

"He? What makes you think it's a he?" she replied, her voice more upbeat than her hunched-over posture would suggest.

"Okay fine, it's a girl. What difference does it make? It's just a bird."

"It's not just a _bird," _ she replied with indignation, "It's a chocobo and they're very intelligent."

Lilleas bent over and pulled up a large tuft of grass. Then she walked over to the chocobo, approaching it from the front, and held out her hand. The bird emerged from under Cloud, tentative, and cocked its head to the side. Lilleas resisted the urge to pet the bird and left her hand in place. It took a few steps towards her, pecked at the grass, then took a few more steps and started devouring the grass . While the chocobo was eating, Lilleas stepped back and mused, "I think we should name her Peony."

The word was barely out of her mouth before Zack responded, "Peony? It's a bird not a flower."

"Hmmm, well why don't you come up with a name then," she challenged.

"How about Butter Butt?"

Lilleas glared and Zack responded, "Okay, okay, I wasn't being serious there," but he couldn't help the smile that crept up on his face. Lilleas' scowl intensified, wiping the smug grin off of Zack. He looked over at the chocobo, its yellow rump sticking straight up in the air, its silhouette a smaller version of Cloud's hair. "How about Lil' Spike?"

She thought for a moment and smiled, "I like it."

"Actually, now that I think about it, the chocobo won't be little forever. In a few months he'll be bigger than Cloud."

"Yeah. . ." There was a minute pause, then Lilleas said, "How about Guinevere?"

Zack snorted with derision, "We're not living in some fantasy story. That name sounds too elegant for a bird. How about. . . "

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_Today he had an extended lunch break, so he decided to meet up with Aerith at the park. As he opened the gateway connecting the two worlds, he was assaulted by the strong smell of garbage interlaced with hot grease. 'Lunch time in the Slums,' he mused,_

_By the time he reached the playground, the smell had gone away and he almost forgot he was in the den of poverty itself. Over on the park bench she was sitting, lounged back with legs crossed and pretty pink lips upturned in an expectant smile. He opened up his arms in an inviting gesture and said, "Hey, it looks like you're waiting for someone."_

_She lounged back on the bench, feigning boredom, "Yeah, but he hasn't shown up yet. . . " _

_Zack walked towards her, trying to hide the grin on his face. He sat down next to her, so close he could feel her warm breath on his neck. He was having trouble keeping his voice steady, "You sure your boyfriend won't mind?"_

"_I won't tell if you won't," she said, leaning in close. Their lips met and for a moment the background faded and all was her. _

"_Ewwwwwww!" complained the children watching nearby._

_Aerith pulled away, bringing a hand to her cheek to hide the bright blush. Lost in a daze, Zack looked at Aerith and then the children. _

_The children started giggling before Zack could respond. Aerith grabbed Zack's hand and started to pull him away from the scene. _

"_I didn't realize we had an audience. . . " Zack mumbled. _

"_Oh don't mind them, they don't matter much," she said, trying to conceal her own doubt. _

_As they approached the Church, Zack mounted the stairs ahead of Aerith and opened the door. She smiled at him sweetly and walked through the threshold. Upon entering, she saw a disturbance in her flowerbed, the lilles bobbing up and down. Zack was already a step ahead of her, one hand on the hilt of his sword, advancing with caution. There was a flash of yellow between the foliage. Zack ran up and whipped out his sword. "I got you now!"_

_A small baby chocobo emerged from the lilies, a flower stem still in its mouth. It gave out a frightened warble and scurried over to hide under the closest pew. Aerith grabbed up some of the partially eaten flowers before running over to its aid. She cast a disapproving glance in his direction, "Zack, it's just a baby chocobo."_

_Zack looked away from her, towards the partially mangled flowers. "Sorry, I just meant to scare him. He was eating your flowers." _

"_Well you almost gave him a heart attack," she said in that sweet voice of hers, capable of scolding but without anger. She was now occupied with trying to feed the scared little bird flower fragments. _

_Zack sheathed his sword and walked over to Aerith, standing at a reasonable distance. He bent over and snuck a peek at the creature. It stared back at him with large unblinking eyes. Zack laughed, "I'm not that scary am I?" The bird continued to stare at Zack. _

_He crouched down near Aerith. The bird took a step towards her, eyeing Zack with caution, and started to nibble the plants. Within a minute the chocobo had demolished nearly all of the proffered foliage. Aerith handed Zack the remaining bits to Zack discreetly, and he offered them to the bird, which was so engaged in the act of eating it had not stopped to notice its meal had changed hands. After it was all gone, the chocobo looked up at Zack with large eyes and retreated back to its sanctuary, shielding itself from invaders by hiding under its wing. _

_Zack sighed, "Well I tried." _

"_Well wild animals are naturally scared of humans. Although I don't think it helped that you nearly tried to kill him," Aerith joked, but no one was laughing. _

_Another sigh, this one deeper than the one before. "I guess I can't win every battle." Zack stood up and walked around a bit before sitting down by the flowers. The air seemed less stale here, but still a far cry from the fresh air above the plate. He yawned, "I think I'm going to take a nap." _

_Aerith looked over at him and echoed his yawn, "I think I might come join you." _

_The wooden floor beneath him was hard, but yielded a small amount as he laid back on it. It reminded him of the bed during his early years in the military. He smiled. Interrupting his thoughts was the sound of footsteps, each one making the old wooden floor creak in protest. He turned his head to see Aerith approaching. She laid down and wrapped herself around him, resting her head on his chest. It seemed perfect, too perfect to last, as if they were perched on the cusp of a bubble and it was going to burst momentarily. _

_Upon waking his eyelids felt heavy, and his head fuzzy, like it was stuffed with cotton from ear to ear. He took a look at his watch and noticed it was ten minutes to two, he needed to get back to work. Aerith was tucked under his chin, sleeping, rising gently with each breath he took. He hated to wake her, but he didn't want to leave without saying goodbye. He nudged her gently, "Aerith it's time to wake up. I have to go back to work now." _

_She looked up at him and nodded drowsily. As Zack sat up, he noticed a splotch of yellow behind her. Upon closer examination he noticed it was the baby chocobo from earlier. He helped Aerith sit up, being careful that she didn't roll over onto the bird. In a hushed voice he pointed it out to her, "Look it's the baby chocobo." _

_Aerith turned around carefully and saw the small creature sleeping between her and the flowers. Aerith smiled brightly, "I think I'll name it Cuddles," she said._

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

"Cuddles. . ." he said, almost whimsically.

"Wait, what did you just say?" asked Lilleas.

"Why don't we name the bird Cuddles?" Lilleas giggled in response, making no attempt to hide it. "Hey, what's wrong with that? I thought you'd like it," Zack said, the annoyance in his voice obvious.

There was a break in her laughter. "I do, but I didn't expect it coming from you."

Zack snorted, "So what do you say?"

"Yeah sure, I like it." She walked over to the bird, still nestled under Cloud's arm, and started to pet it. "Cuddles, that seems like a good name for you."

Leaning into her touch, the bird chirped, "Wark." As she sat there, working her fingers through its downy feathers, she asked, "Do you miss your family?"

The bird cocked its head, as if it understood the question. "Kweh?"

"Cloud probably reminds you of your mom." She continued to pet the bird as it settled down to go to sleep.

Zack came up behind her, his footsteps slow and ominous, the leaves crunching under his boots. She did not turn around because she knew what he was going to say, could hear the damning words before he spoke them. "Lilleas, there's something we need to talk about." The words came out slow and articulate, artificial, as if he had practiced it over in his head one too many times "This journey has become too dangerous for you."

She did not reply nor look up. In the distance, a lone wolf cried, a melodious howl shattering the silence. The chocobo woke up immediately, his eyes as big as saucers as he scanned the distance for impending doom. Lilleas stroked the chocobo in an effort to calm him, but the bird continued to shake.

Zack wasn't worried, a wolf could be killed with a quick swipe of his sword. There were much bigger issues to face at the moment, like the one right in front of him. He closed the gap between him, a few feet at most, which now seemed like an insurmountable distance. One step, two, four, eight, and done. With a sigh of relief he sat down next to her, leaving a small space between them. She pulled her legs into her chest and rested her head between them, the way a turtle retreats into its shell. Zack rested his hand on her back, "So where is home for you?"

"Nowhere," she mumbled into her knees. "I ran away from home."

"I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you."

Raising her head inches above her knees, she spoke once more, "I ran away from home." Her voice was much harsher than intended, angry, but without heat, like the cold breeze that swept through the night air chilling them to the bone.

"Oh. . ." Words eluded him at the moment. He tried to say something, but his tongue twisted around the words and it came out as an unintelligible grunt. Nearby him was a stick, so he grabbed it and started picking at the dirt in the crevices of his shoes.

After a while she spoke, "It was a few months before I met you and Cloud."

He leaned over and turned to face her, but her eyes were still trained on her legs. "I couldn't take it anymore so I ran away. My mom and dad fought all the time. . ." The intensity of her breathing increased, quick spurts of inhalation, as if she couldn't get enough air.

The forest suddenly seemed too small-trees forming the bars of a cage holding them in. Zack looked up at the sky, dark as pitch, and wished he had wings, feathered limbs of freedom to take them away from this earthly prison.

Lilleas continued, "Sometimes he hit her."

Zack came crashing down before even taking flight. With fists clenched by his side, he said, "That bastard never hit you did he? Cause if he did I'll- "

She cut him off, "No. Not yet at least."

"Good." They both uttered a sigh. "So your dad sounds like an asshole, what was your mom like?"

"He wasn't my real dad. I never knew my real dad, he left before I was born." She paused briefly, and Zack opened his mouth to speak, but she continued before he could get a word in. "My mom remarried when I was about eight. Dave, my step-dad, was a nice guy at first. He brought me gifts on occasion, little things like a pack of bubblegum and pony toys, but that stopped fairly early in their relationship. Now that I think back on it, my mother might have started to see the warning signs, but as a poor single mother she saw financial security with him. If I were in her position I might have done the same. . . "

The silence pooled around them, drawing them under its thick current running through the darkness. Minutes passed before she spoke, "When he drank it was always the worst. It was better after the birth of my sister, Loni, but then it started back up again. He would come home from work drunk, staggering through the doorway and into the kitchen or wherever else my mom was. Then he'd start a fight over something, anything could set him off." The apathy in her voice gave way to a somber tone as she continued, "One night he tripped over one of Loni's toys and exploded in a burst of anger. My sister and I would hide in my room, huddled together under the blankets of my bed. I still remember the sound of her muffled tears, wet against my chest. He wasn't much better sober. We'd constantly get into fights that always ended with him telling me to pack my bags and leave, so one day I did."

In the luminescence of the moon, her fair skin seemed far too pale, and her figure gaunt underneath her muddied dress, as if she was fading into the night. Zack wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. "So how did you end up with those two brutes? The ones we found you with."

She spoke into knees, "I hadn't been on the streets for too long when one of them came up to me and offered me a warm meal and a job. With a sigh she continued, " I should have known better. . . "

"Don't blame yourself. They were preying on you," Zack added, hoping some of what he said got through to her.

"I guess," she shrugged. "My only regret is leaving Loni behind."

"Well, wouldn't your mom do something if she was really in danger?"

"I don't know. . ." A moment of silence followed by tears, choked sobs of repressed anger being released into the cool night air

"Hey come on, it's not your fault." He hugged her tighter. "Bad things happen in this world and that's just the way it is." Minutes passed before the tears dried up. Zack wanted to wait until she calmed down before springing the next question, "Do you have anyone else you can stay with?"

She spoke, her voice still shaky, "I might be able to stay with my aunt. We were close when I was younger, before my mom got remarried." Her last few words bordered on audible while tears started to form at the corner of her eyes.

"Hey, don't worry," he said in the most soothing voice he could manage. "We're not going to just drop you off in the middle of nowhere.' She looked up at him, eyes glistening in the faint light, vacant, staring right through him as if he wasn't there. A shiver ran down his spine. He tried to tell himself it was just the wind, but at the moment the night was still.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

It was early in the morning when they set out. The sun just peaked over the horizon, casting a golden glow over the forest. Their shadows stretched long over the ground, moving sluggishly as a unit through the unbeaten path, pausing every now and then to disassemble and regroup. Upon nightfall, they stopped to camp, unpacking their bags and making a quick dinner before they lay their weary bodies down to rest.

This was the pattern by which they laid the framework of their days, and as time passed, the imminent threat of ShinRa began to subside. The fear that had been looming over them, clinging to their every step, gave way to a false sense of security.

Eventually, the forest gave way to gravel roads and short squatty houses. They skirted the edges of the town, looking for a place to stock up on supplies. In the distance was a dilapidated gas station standing alone amongst the weeds and overgrown sedge, a remnant of time past that stood not because of the world but in spite of it. The outside, once painted white, was now chipped and fading while the boards that held it together were coming apart at the seams.

At the moment it was empty, a perfect opportunity to enter the store. Zack had Lilleas sit with Cloud and Cuddles right outside the door, within listening distance if anything were to happen. He grabbed up several boxes of energy bars and bags of dried meat and dropped them on the counter.

The wide eyed-attendant looked at the food stash, mouth agape. "What are you doing, running a marathon?"

While fishing around in his pocket for his wallet, Zack answered back, "Yeah, something like that."

The man looked like he was about to say something else, but caught sight of Zack's glowing blue eyes and thought better of it. Zack looked around the store as the man rang up his items and spotted some chocolate. He picked up a few bars and threw them on the counter. "If you could get these too."

The man stopped for a moment, raised an eyebrow, and then went back to the business of ringing things up. Zack paid the man in cash and walked out with three bulging plastic bags. Outside Lilleas was leaned up against Cloud, scanning the distance. Setting his bags down, Zack crouched down beside her and offered her a bar of chocolate. She took it weakly and snapped off a piece for herself and put the rest in her bag. At the sound of rustling foil, Cuddles chirped excitedly and flapped his little wings. Lilleas dug the candy bar out of her bag and snapped off another piece.

"He doesn't need chocolate Lilleas," Zack said, sounding much like a father reprimanding his daughter.

"I know. I'm just letting him smell it." As she brought the chocolate into the bird's proximity, he took a chomp out of it, chewed, and spit it out. Lilleas let out a small gasp, matched in intensity by Zack's weary sigh.

Zack stuffed the contents of his purchase in their bags, then hoisted Cloud to his feet and they took off to the back of the store, away from the gravel road. A few houses dotted the landscape, but Zack and his friends were shielded from view by the overgrown weeds that dominated the field.

Somewhere in this town was an inn. The thought of a warm, dry bed appealed to Zack's most primal instinct of need for shelter, but it wasn't safe, not yet. So they pressed on, the rolling hills before them like an undulating wave in water and they the fish, swimming up current. After walking for only a few hours, Lilleas started to drag behind, forcing them to stop for several minutes at a time until they were resting more than walking. At the first sight of a clump of trees, they decided to stop for the day. They set out their supplies and unrolled their blankets, laying on their backs, mouths agape as they watched the sun fall from the sky.

Zack rolled over to face Cloud and closed his eyes. Trapped in the solitude of the darkness his memories came alive, a spark of light he could not escape. He could not explain how it happened, only that it did and he was now trapped in a nightmare of the past, an experience that had changed him forever.

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Author's Note:** First off I apologize for this update being soooo late. How long has it been, six months? *sigh* Life has been so crazy in the past few months. If you really want to know more, you can send me a message. It's a long list, seriously. Things have calmed down substantially by this point.

Anyway, I missed writing, I really did. I'm going to try to get back on track and write everyday, like I used to. For me, once I stop writing, it takes a few days to get back into the swing of things. I wouldn't be surprised if lots of people stopped reading, but for those that still are, thanks! It means a lot to me ^^ Also, thanks to all of my friends who have been so supportive of me :D *snuggles*


	27. Chapter 27

**In the Shadow of Freedom**

**Chapter 27**

_**Beta Reader: Icey (aka Ice Lady)**_

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Summary of Last Chapter:**As they continue on their journey they find a chocobo and name it Cuddles. Lilleas reveals an abusive past while Zack comforts her. He explains to her that the journey is too dangerous, and she cannot stay with them for much longer. When they take a break to sleep Zack recalls a haunting memory that involves Aden. (Because it's been so long most everyone has probably forgotten who Aden was. . . A few chapters ago Zack was looking at his dead pursuers, one of them being Aden, and it started a chain of bad memories. Aden was one of Cloud's peers at ShinRa and also a bully. He was in a few flashbacks.)

**Warning: **This chapter contains a rape scene. Compared to other rape scenes it's not that explicit, but it is rape, and it's horrible. *sigh* I feel like too many people rely on it as a plot device and try to glorify it (some may not even realize that's what they're doing). That's not what happens here. I tried to portray it as it actually is, a horribly devastating event that really traumatizes people. This will be the only rape scene in the whole story. The trauma does not need to be repeated. Zack would never forgive me ;_;

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_They were slumped against the walls of their cell. The grey walls had never seemed more ominous, thick slabs of concrete towering over them, blocking out the rest of the world. Zack stared at his boots stretched out in front of him. The fresh mud still clung to his shoes, a remnant of his failed escape attempt. A thick layer of it had formed on the edge of his soles and was starting to dry, turning into brown powdery dust. They made it as far as the outskirts of the ShinRa mansion before they were apprehended, caught as they were halfway up the rusted gates and thrown back in their cells. No one had ever escaped the confines of the ShinRa Mansion successfully, but Zack refused to become just another bloated specimen suspended in Mako, or even worse, a mindless drone of Jenova._

_Zack did not even realize his hands were shaking until he looked down and saw them resting on the floor, trembling. Sweat flowed through his pores, soaking through his shirt and coating his face in an oily film. His heart thumped hard against his chest despite his efforts to calm down. Beside him was Cloud, arms hanging limp at his side. His complexion was pale as a ghost, as if all of his blood had been drained out and sitting in his place was the shell of a man, so fragile that he looked as if a single touch might shatter him into a thousand pieces. Zack reached out a cautious hand and touched Cloud's shoulder._

"_You don't look so good. Are you okay?" Cloud's only response was a slight twitch of the fingers. "I know, that was a stupid question." It was silent, save for a faint moan emanating from the hallway, the pained sound reverberating through the walls. Another moan, but this one was quieter than the one before. Zack shuddered in response. _

_He stood up, making his way over to the corner and started to do squats. Anything to take his mind off of the unspeakable horrors that took place here. The tingling sensation in his muscles felt good, the repetition akin to a mantra, and his anxiety started to absolve. He sat back down next to Cloud, who was scrunched up with his knees to his chest. Reaching a hand out, he rubbed Cloud's back. "C'mon, it's not so bad. What's the worst Hojo can do? Add another year onto our lifetime sentence?" _

_Cloud turned towards Zack and looked at him, his eyes glassy, light shades of blue with dark shadows in-between. Zack could see into the darkness, the void of Cloud's soul, and it _hurt_, the emptiness an endless pit of despair. Cloud was lost to the world, suspended somewhere beyond the limited constructs of the universe, at least a part of him. Zack knew that if they didn't get out of here soon there might not be anything left of Cloud to save. _

_A low rumble could be heard coming down the hall, soft at first, but now growing in intensity. As it came closer, Zack could make out the distinct sound of several pairs of footsteps. Before he knew it, he had pressed himself against the wall, his body reacting to the inevitable punishment. _

_Three shadows suddenly appeared, creeping through the hallway, the smallest one leading the way. Zack watched as the shadows materialized into the shapes of three men, Hojo, Aden, and some other guard he did not recognize. Hojo stood in front of their cell, arms behind his back, pacing back and forth. Then he stopped pacing and threw a hard glance at them, his dark beady eyes effectively pinning them in place. They wilted, like a barely alive butterfly in a jar, suffocating._

"_Did you really think you could get away?" The two men behind Hojo smiled, the faint light accentuating the shadows under their eyes. "After all I've done for you, and this is how you repay me." Hojo smirked before continuing, "No one has ever escaped from here, at least not alive." He threw his head back and cackled, the sound filling the air and penetrating the dead space in-between. _

_Hojo reached into the one of the large pockets of his lab coat and fumbled around for the keys. Hunched over, he jammed the key into the lock while muttering something to the guards. He placed himself strategically behind the entryway as Aden and the other guard made their way into the cell. _

_As Aden approached, Zack could feel his muscles coil in response, ready to spring, but out of the corner of his eye he caught a glimpse of Cloud slumped over with his hands behind his back, a noticeable tremble wracking his body. Everything about Cloud reminded Zack of a man walking to the gallows. His resolve faltered as feelings of guilt set in. His life was no longer his own but a part of Cloud's. _

_Zack grimaced as he felt the cool metal encircle his wrists. Aden grabbed his arm from the side and dragged him out of the room. Zack kept his gaze directed at the ground, but as he left the cell he could feel Hojo smile, those thin shapeless lips burning into the back of his head, searing into this memory. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:. **_

_Everything was dark, so dark it seeped into your pores and blackened your heart. In this place time stood still. Day and night merged into one, existence stretched thin like a dark sheet of fabric, cloaking him in its void. _

_He wasn't sure how he got here. He knew why he was here, but the details had gotten lost somehow, like he was in a dream, jumping from one event to the next without being aware of the happenings prior. Every day he was given some stale bread and water through a hole in the door. Apparently Hojo just wanted them to starve, but not to death. That would have been too kind. _

_The room was small with just enough space for Zack to lay out in only one direction. In the beginning he did squats to pass the time, but as days went by he found he spent more and more time curled up into a ball, rocking._

_For days all he could see was Hojo's sick and twisted smile floating in the darkness, faceless, as if it was an entity unto itself. Then he started hearing voices in his head and slowly Hojo's smile dissipated into the darkness. It was something not of this world, unnatural, a metallic voice that made his blood run cold. He felt it more than heard it, as if it were a part of him, pulsing through his heart, each sharp beat a plea for him to go to sleep, go to sleep forever. _

_He'd heard of mako sickness before. It was the sort of thing whispered about behind closed doors or spread around at a bar by a SOLDIER with one too many drinks. They were all just rumors until Zack saw it happen to Angeal, watched the madness consume him until there was nothing left but a monster. Shortly after, Sephiroth jumped off the edge of sanity, taking the town of Nibelheim with him. Zack could not forget the things he saw that night, Sephiroth's wild green eyes reflecting the flames that flickered, the madness burning from within. _

_And now Jenova was after him. He could feel her vying for control, attempting to shut him down, and his body felt so heavy, like his appendages were made of lead. The lure of sleep was tempting, but he knew better than to succumb to Jenova, so he continued to rock until she disappeared, retreating to the deep recesses of his mind. Then he grabbed the thin blanket he was provided and wrapped it around himself. He was half-asleep as he hit the floor. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_The door to his cell opened suddenly, the long drawn out sound stirring Zack out of his sleep. Light poured into his cell, cutting through the darkness, like the sun after a long drawn out eclipse. He brought his arm up over his eyes to shield himself from the burning sensation. Then he heard footsteps, barely making a sound as someone stepped into his cell. _

_Zack's eyes had not yet adjusted to the light when the door closed and everything was dark once more. The other man spoke, his voice penetrating through the darkness, "Well, well, well, if it isn't Zack Fair, EX-SOLDIER 1st Class. Look at how far you've fallen." _

_Zack knew this man, his voice taunting him from beyond the bars of his cell, the echo haunting his dreams. Aden turned on a lamp, its bright orange light casting a dull glow over the room, giving the room an otherworldly appearance. Zack could see Aden's face, swathed in shadow, his thin lips spread into a smile, upturned at the corners. In his delirium, Zack thought for a moment that he was in hell, and Aden was the gatekeeper, waiting to usher him to his doom. _

_His hair stood on end, but there was nowhere to run and he was weak, perhaps too weak to fight. He stood up on shaky legs, leaning against the wall for support. _

_Aden moved closer, his voice taking on a more menacing tone, "You don't know how long I've been waiting for this."_

"_What are you talking about?" Zack asked, trying not to let his voice tremble. _

"_It's because of you that I was never promoted to SOLDIER. You reported that fight with Cloud to my superiors, and it tarnished my record."_

_As the memories of Aden's abuse came back, anger took hold of Zack, "That was your own damn fault! You weren't playing by the rules." _

_Zack watched with horror as Aden drew a pistol from his belt and held it up to the side of his head. Aden's other hand reached out and grabbed his throat, squeezing tight. "Lucky for me, there aren't any rules here," he said, as a smirk came over his face. _

_Summoning up his strength, Zack elbowed Aden in the gut sharply. As Aden doubled over, Zack ran to the other side of the cell, preparing to make his next move. Still bent over, Aden kept a firm grip on the pistol and pointed it towards Zack. "If you want what's best for Cloud then you better behave," he said, a look of agony marring his features. _

_For a moment Zack froze, and then he scowled, looking at Aden with bitter hatred, "If you touch him, I'll rip you apart."_

"_You're not in a position to be making threats. Let's not forget who's in charge of who," Aden said, slowly returning to an upright position with a groan. With an amused edge to his voice, he continued, "Now be a good _puppy_ and take off your clothes."_

_As the word 'puppy' reached his ears, Zack couldn't help but wince, it was painful, like the sound of someone scratching a chalkboard. This only made Aden's smile bigger. _

_Zack removed his clothes unceremoniously, avoiding Aden's gaze as he did so. It didn't take long for Aden to close the space between them. The close proximity was unnerving. Tracing his fingers along Zack's torso, Aden purred, "Now I see why Angeal claimed you as his own personal bitch." _

_With clenched teeth, Zack uttered a low growl. Zack knew what Aden was trying to do, reach into his soul and pull out his most beloved memories. But Zack wouldn't let him destroy in minutes what took a lifetime to create. Aden could destroy his body, but no one could have his soul. _

_He was turned around to face the wall. The mottled grey concrete was a welcome sight in comparison. There was some rustling as Aden drew something out of his pocket. In the dim light Zack could not identify the object until he felt the smooth leather encircle his neck. The shocking realization came to him, it was a dog collar. Then a voice, hot and heavy, whispered in his ear, "You're my puppy now." _

_A convulsion ran through Zack's body, his skin prickling with goosebumps. Aden grabbed a thick chunk of hair and pulled him down to his knees. With a firm hand still in Zack's hair, he tilted his head to the side and bit the crook of his neck, his teeth breaking the skin. "I can taste your fear." _

"_You sick fuck," Zack spit out, his response automatic, like a reflex. The next thing he knew there was a sharp pain and a deafening sound, his skull colliding with the wall. _

"_Don't talk unless I tell you to," Aden said, the anger evident in his voice. Then Zack could hear the soft sound of a zipper, and he closed his eyes in a desperate attempt to imagine himself in a different place, but the stress formed a shroud that made his thoughts inaccessible. An arm slid across his waist, holding onto him with a firm, sweaty hand. As the man shifted forward, Zack clenched his teeth to prevent himself from screaming, but the pain forced it out, a deep guttural cry. _

_The man laughed. "Is my puppy having fun?" Then he started thrusting, moaning in an exaggerated fashion to further the humiliation. _

_It felt as if a fire was running through him, burning him from the inside out. The sweat pooled on his face and dripped into his eyes, blurring the scene before him. At one point dark spots appeared before him, mottling his vision, and he felt as if he were going to collapse, but the arm around him tightened, holding him firmly in place. Akin to a nightmare, the assault seemed to last for hours, each second painstakingly slow. When it ended, the arm around him disappeared and he collapsed onto the floor. _

_He felt Aden turn him onto his back, his limp body rolling over with ease. As he came into contact with the cold stone floor he hissed with pain. Then the man crawled on top of him, pinning his arms over his head. Aden dove in for a kiss, his tongue pushing past Zack's chapped lips, assaulting his mouth. Zack gagged on the bitter aftertaste of the foreign saliva as the kiss ended. Aden's face now hovered inches above him, his eyes large in the dim light, capturing his own. It was impossible to look away. "You're mine now, and I'll take you whenever I want," he paused, his voice deepening, "_or else. . ."

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

_Hours passed after Aden's departure and Zack still remained on his back, the same position he was left in. Moving would require energy and that had been drained out of him hours ago. Tears filled his eyes, but he didn't care to wipe them away. In this solitude he felt free to cry until his tears dried up, and then cry some more. _

_He felt at one with the darkness. If flowed through him, coursing through his veins and filling his heart. The sorrow was so great it felt as if his heart would give out, like a dying star collapsing under its own weight, leaving a black hole in its stead. He didn't think he would be able to feel again, that there would be anything beyond a hole in his chest where his heart used to be. _

_Images of Aerith and Cloud crossed his mind, but he pushed them away. They would be ashamed to see their hero sprawled out on the floor, naked, bruised, and bleeding. He wasn't a hero. He couldn't even save himself at the moment. And he couldn't think of Angeal now, the mere thought of him sent a wave of nausea through his body. _

_He could feel his stomach churning, his mouth filling with warm saliva. The nausea had gotten progressively worse. The waste bucket on the other side of the room was too far away. At the moment, all Zack could manage was to sit up and turn his head to the side as the vomit came up. The acrid smell of his stomach contents in the poorly ventilated room only further perpetuated the nausea. He threw-up several more times until his stomach gave up. _

_Panting, he crawled to the side of the room, furthest away from the vomit. He curled up on his side, hiding his head in his hands, and hoping to pass out. He was glad it was dark. There were things in that room he never wanted to see. _

_**.:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:...:`'~ ж~'`:.**_

**Author's Note:** I realize I probably lost most of my readers because of the long absence. If you're still reading this I thank you for staying with me and Zack :) I had to take a break for many reasons, one of them concerning the multiple wars within the FF 7 fandom. People got really nasty and would use my most personal information against me. It just really turned me off to the fandom. The other big reason was that I needed to pass my pharmacy exams, which I did, so I'm now a licensed pharmacist :D Unfortunately, my hip issues continue. . . Yes, there's more than one injury now, at least two, but maybe three. Long story, but I found a new doctor that's really awesome, so it looks like I might get things fixed :)

Thanks to **Blue Jae** and **Icey** (aka **Ice Lady**) for helping me with the content of this chapter! Ugh, it was so hard to write. . . I can't write sex scenes, and then having to write THIS D: **Icey** writes the most awesome sex scenes * -* If you're into Thor let me know and I'll link you to her stories 8D


	28. Update

So I was hoping the next chapter update would be an actual story chapter. Unfortunately it's not. Since the last chapter I had hip surgery on my left hip and found out that I will need another one soon on the right hip. Do any of you know Lady Gaga? She recently had hip surgery for Femoroacetabular Impingement and a labral tear. I have the same thing. I tore my right hip labrum on March 2009 and had surgery, tore the left hip labrum June 2011 and had surgery, and I retore my right hip labrum on August 2012. It is incredibly painful, and the surgery is very hard to recover from. I've had ongoing hip pain for four years now, and it seems like an eternity.

My first surgery failed because the surgeon didn't know what he was doing. I had a much better surgeon for the second one and am seeking out a specialist for a revision hip scope. I'm hoping to have surgery soon. There are only about 5 true hip scope specialists in the country. Add to that several other medical ailments, and the past few months have been filled with more pain than I've ever known. I don't want to get into specifics, but it's been incredibly hard to read and write. I spend much of my free time watching TV and playing video games because they block out my thoughts. I'm not depressed, just scared. I miss writing a lot. I hope to be back soon. Thank you all for understanding. And to those of you that have reviewed it really means a lot to me. I shall reply to your reviews soon! *Hugs*


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